When I was a child observing my mother and other women, I knew I would regret motherhood, so I made the decision at 9 to never have babies. I didn't even play with the dolls I got for my birthdays and Christmas. They just sat on the shelf in my room. I was a bookworm, not interested in playing "house." Now, when my great nieces are born, I make it a point to gift their parents with books and electronics for when they get older. I will never buy a female child a doll, a doll house, a tea set, or any domestic toys. That is just setting them up to live within societal expectations.
@NotGettingWhatIPaidForUA-cam AMEN and Hallelujah to everything you said. It is so true. It does not take actually going through something to realize it is not for you. I can look at the life of drug addicts, alcoholics, and mothers to know I don't want to experience any of that. So I stay away from drugs, alcohol, and had a hysterectomy to ensure my life trajectory was my own choice. I am not letting life just happen to me. Tradition and societal dictates be damned.
I think we need a balance of both. A doll house and a tea set are perfectly acceptable gifts for children of both sexes and so is a technology and books. I got it all. It was wonderful to be a bookworm who also was obsessed with cooking and Barbies. This makes us fully fleshed out human beings capable of all the possibilities ! Actually I think we should normalize giving boys dolls and domestic toys! Listen we humans become great cooks, starting with that play set!
Idk i played with barbies and brats too but they were always young hot girls having fun 😂. Never played family but more so like young women in college or something. Even back then i knew Barbie was not being a mom on her cruise ship. 😂
@@Spokentruths725 You can't even compare the two though. Getting Leapfrog didn't lead you into tech because there were no societal messages reinforcing that path for you. When girls are given baby dolls, doll houses, and tea sets there are strong societal messages, influences, and pressure reinforcing domesticity for women. Therein lies the difference.
I’ll never forget the day my mom broke down because we were acting so bad, and was shrieking “why did I have children?!” I felt really bad. Also, i thought. Duly noted.
I experienced that, too - more than once. Her situation was really a generational thing. When she was a girl, basically her option was "Find a good man to marry, settle down and have kids, or you'll be an old maid." Once I got older, I could understand her frustration and forgive the hurt, but it definitely had an impact on my choice to remain childless. I often wonder what she would have liked to have done with her life if she hadn't had kids. I'll never know.
I never had kids or wanted them and have not even had a pet since I left my childhood home. Though, i have an extremely high maintenance career as a cartoonist in the publishing, film, and music industries so ive moved 60 times and toured the world for years. So its not just the fact i had to be mini mom , my survival depends on mobility and flexibility
@OriginalContent89 Can't speak for them, but realizing mom was capable of being hurt and being frustrated, I started seeing less as a mom and more as a separate person. Both in good and bad ways. While I couldn't name it, her calmness started to feel more distant. I didn't know it was from being overwhelmed and kinda checked out. I just wondered why teachers and strangers felt more warm. And that I really didn't know much about this person and she won't tell me. Lack of warmth felt personal, her probably regretting having children, I understood, accepted and never judged her for it.
Sister girl, who didn’t understand the difference between not liking motherhood and not liking kids, needs to LISTEN to what those women ACTUALLY said and not succumb to the trauma her momma gave her. No where did those women say they didn’t like their children. No where.
She clearly heard what she wanted to hear. Like you said, none of those women implied that they hate their kids. Sounds like sis was projecting and deflect hard.
When I was growing up, I didn't see a woman in my family happy about being a mother. I will not have children. If I change my mind adoption, I will be there. Just because you have the equipment to have a baby doesn't mean you should use it.
As someone who was forced into taking a parental role for my nieces and nephews due to negligent parents, I tend to not like the community argument. I do not want responsibility for other people's children when I choose to be child free. I pay my taxes, it is not my fault the government sends that money to Ukraine instead of parental programs like free daycare.
There's a sense of entitlement people with kids have when it comes to child free family. And it's not fair to us. We make the choice not to have a child at the moment and people take advantage of that. This is my worry with the "community" argument. I do believe the nuclear family works too, but modernity has complicated it.
Also, modernity has changed children. It is substantially harder to raise a child now with internet, social media, television, etc. Public school defunding. The kids aren't getting smarter. They're behaving worse and worse. So to put that on other people for the name of "community" isn't fair. We have to take responsibility for our choices, even when it's hard.
I feel this....even the possibility of it happening makes me bitter. I just haven't been called to the plate because of distance, if we lived in the same city I'd be screwed....
I’m so glad this convo is happening. The village is gone, a lot of the child free community, grandparents, and dads wanna be optional or dont value kids or don’t want to be involved with children at all. Being a mom is mandatory, non stop.
Fathers are praised even if dead beats. Moms are never praised unless they're miserable. Don't have children if you like your body and your freedom and sleep. It's 24/7 and nothing is expected from the Dads. If you are a Mom, just do it single, Dads will just drag you down and be another child to care for.
Honestly the whole fathers are praised thing can be stopped with the more current generations. We had to give him praise because we were still heavily conditioned back then. If mom didnt let him play a role when he wanted to then it just made things worse. You can only do so much after the kid is here because most women will still allow a man to be a father even if its a half asses shitty one. I used to be like this with my deadbeat and then i woke up. We grow up thinking we have involved fathers because he isn’t completely gone. Smh
@MsAverageChick I hear you. Although, I NEVER thought men were involved Fathers. Lol! My Dad was a literal Dead Beat posted on The Post Office walls and a pedo. In my experience, most males in the family are pedos. Most girls in my experience SA by their own Father, brother, cousin, uncle, etc. And the elder women did nothing. Blames us. Our own Mothers jealous of a toddler because her man wants a child. I used to only hang out with males because the female elders were dangerous to girls. For me, men weren't the problem - the women who protected them were - mainly their Mothers and wives. So, whatever our elder women were, they were soldiers for the men's member above all. Their daughters harmed, jealousy, not help. All the elders need to go, then the world will have a chance. It's the elder women holding up the churches that say believe women are less than. If women stopped pushing the male religions it would all stop now. They refuse so the only solution is all the elders must be no more. They're toxic as bleep.
@@juliebella1221 i 100% agree but they arent ready for this conversation. I seen it in my own family as well. Yes the pedo is committing the act but they get so much further in life with enablers. My grandmother still feels the need to take care of her pedo brother whenever something happens to him and im over here waiting on him to take his last breath. They hide behind being evil with religion and this do not judge mentality. Yes if they weren’t so male centered many of us would have been protected. This was the only reason i gave my deadbeat any credit. The women in my family also encouraged a one sided relationship and ignored all of his shady acts because “thats my father” smh. Im not having kids but if i do they will not be subjected to this.
@@Spokentruths725 👏👏👏Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. Times a go zillion. My brother's side of the family had girls for the male family members to pass around without the complication of the law; not that the po po did anything when they found out. They had to outlaw marrying cousins, it's so rampant. They SA girls so young, they murder whoever she would've been and all that's left is a zombie walking. Around the world you look and you're like, you do all the cooking???? Then why are any of the men who abuse still alive? How they don't see that it is the elder women keeping them enslaved, not the men, is beyond me. I don't listen to elders and I never have. They always seemed to be the most dangerous and the cruelest. I don't talk to my Mother anymore, but the last time I did, she was still a slave to the male member. Her comment was, "I am still 'bleepable.'" Still dieting because men basically want men with long hair and make up to bleep - that's why they push being thin so much - majority are not straight and loathe women. Their pleasure is our pain. It's just that simple. It's beyond gross, but it's just that simple. It's why they laugh so when we cry. These broken dolls for dollars, of elder women need to go, need to be no more. Me having pity for them, me saying, oh well, I don't know your childhood, so I'll give you a pass. That ALL changed when I had a child. If you do have one, be prepared, ALL trauma is remembered every year your child grows. Flashbacks, it's horrible. It's the worst. You realize you just stuffed it all way down. The love for your child will have you loathing your own family members and close friends. You look at your little bundle of innocence and joy and think, HOW, HOW could you let them. I'd die for my child in a heartbeat. I would literally fight to the death and resurrect myself and keep fighting for her. Majority of my friends and family had to be cut off when I became a Mom. You realize how many of your friends tolerate that crap, like in Promising Young Girl, it's so rampant what men get away with, apathy is the order of the day, even when it's their own family members. It's vile. I don't recommend having a child in this day and age; 2 plus 2 = 5 now. No joke. So you'd have to homeschool for sure. And, now the world can really hurt you; they get to your through your child and it sucks. You give birth to your heart and your heart walks around outside your body and you want to say, get back in, it's dangerous out here. LOL!! Being a Mom: If you've ever seen in the wild, the impala running a circle around her baby for hours, to keep her baby safe, and the lion is patiently sitting nearby waiting for her to tire.
@@juliebella1221 beautiful statement about being a mom and once again i agree. You sound like an amazing mother and I know your child will love and appreciate all you do. You actually are doing your best and not making excuses like others. People like you show me having kids can be okay. I hope for the best for you and your little one ❤️.
I regret motherhood and understand why mothers do. women were never created to sacrifice for children. Women are supposed to be compensated and helped, but we aren't, so it needs to end. Motherhood has become oppression.
Amen. I wholeheartedly agree. When I see pregnant women, it just makes me sad😔 because of the evil world those innocent babies are being born into. Most of them will be the next generation of suffering wage slaves, drug addicts, and criminals. 😢
@@Childfree334 agreed. My heart hurts for the suffering this world is going to cause them. They will probably have to live in tents and work 3 and 4 jobs to have one. And don't get me started on the school system.
@@Childfree334 glad im not the only one. I hardly feel happy for people who are pregnant. Especially the ones I know who are a mess. They contribute to the problem.
@@Spokentruths725 9 times our of 10 the pregnant women are single, poor, have a toxic relationship with the sperm donor, are morally bankrupt, have no support system, is a substance abuser, or really doesn't want a kid. They are just having the kid to get government assistance or to have old age caretakers. 😢
5:43 these Women NEVER said they hated kids. Nor do childless people constantly go around saying they hate kids. She’s projecting and she should probably speak to her mother about it or go to counseling
Some people just seem dedicated to misunderstanding what people say. I did not hear that woman say she hated her kids, so unless hlshe is taking in general, how the heck did that woman around 5:09 come up with that😐🙄. You can hate your job but love the field you are in or love your co workers, etc.
I made a similar comment about my job and my cousin took it as a means to downplay a 9-5. He was like “see this is why I can’t have regular hours” mind you he still lives with his parents at 27. 😂 you can definitely have two opposing feelings at once.
Raising kids was never meant to be done in this strict Western “nuclear family” setup. From infant stage to about five women will be doing the bulk of childrearing and this was why many cultures always had extended family to help these women in the community when they had children.
I like being a mom, but I absolutely HATE being a working mom. As a teacher and a mom, the parenting was neverending and it made me miserable. If i had to do it better, I would only be a SAHM. So, my advice to women is, choose/find a provider if you want to have an enjoyable experience as a mom.
The woman at the 9-minute mark hit the nail on the head. Would these women regret motherhood if they had more help at home. So much of the stress outside of worrying about your children which will never go away, is that women don't have enough help at home. And I am talking about even when you are married or in a relationship and have a partner. Women take on the bulk of the responsibility I'm talking 80-90% or more.
It took my 30 yrs old male partner 2 consultations, 450 $ and 20 minutes procedure to be sterilised. However doctors won't let 30 yrs old woman like me to have sterilisation, only birth controls wich is so fucked up !!!!
5:39 she's the slow one in the back who didn't understand not one person said they hated their kids or don't like kids. Saying that something is hard isn't saying that they hate doing it.
No. She just doesn’t agree. She’s allowed to see it how she wants just like the ones who want to publicly announce that they hate motherhood. She had a mom like this and so she knows how it feels to be regretted. I have a lot of empathy for her.
@@heathers432She definitely missed the point. These women don't hate kids, they hate the emotional, physical, mental, financial drain that is motherhood and is never ending. Two totally different things.
As a godmother of three beautiful goddaughters I would never buy them a doll unless the doll had a career in hand like Doctor McStuffins that was the first doll I bought one of my goddaughters being a mother is not for everyone being a mother is not the end all gold standing ten toes down in your immediate reality and learning to love on yourself should be gold number 1 knowing your self worth!
The woman at 8:45 is partially correct. Would women regret motherhood if the fathers were pulling equal weight in childcare and the domestic management is a valid question that needs to be answered and resolved before invoking a village. Because as it stands, mothers want a village because the fathers are not pulling their weight and all that would mean is draining free labor from the women around them who have their own lives to be free childcare servants who are to stay silent. And the invocation of a village only starts up when the subject is delegating the responsibilities of raising children to others, but no discussion on what else the village does and how parents see themselves as part of a village. A big reason why mothers are so isolated is that they want free help around the clock, but then use those same children that other people are taking care of as to why they're not going to help others in the village.
Grrrrrlllll you said a word bcuz I been saying this. The same women that stay hollering about a village ain’t never around to offer assistance or care for anybody else. Ironically enough using those same kids as to why they can’t contribute nothing. And the village never includes any other kids but theirs. CF Women are awake to the bs and when we stood up and said we were done being worked like mules it wasn’t just in relation to men. Women, especially blk women, are used as domestic mules in their own families.
YES YES YES YES YES YES I'm an African women, & here it really takes a village to raise kids. However, I don't think American women know what that entails. It means someone can send your child to the shop without your permission. It means you're told when to conceive & who to conceive with. It means important decisions about the child's future are not just decided by the mom. It means others can discipline your child without your permission. It means being there for others
Watching these videos really let’s me know I made the right decision to never ever ever have kids. I don’t even want a dog. I just hit 41. I made that decision at 12 in my home economics class. Nope 👎🏾.
I love motherhood. Having my baby made me a better person, helped me heal, grow and gives me strength. Its hard don’t get me wrong but I would never regret it not ever
The lady with the white T-shirt on that says" Wake Breastfeed Hustle" broke it all the way DOWN... Especially the part about when your child should be talking and potty trained!
I’m a mom of 3 with 1 on the way. It’s not my personality. It’s just a role I participate in. I am ME first and foremost. That will never change. I love my kids and enjoy them most times. But if it wasn’t for my parents being involved and active grandparents, I’d hate motherhood. If it wasn’t for the understanding that I need time away from my kids regularly in order to recharge using self care, I would hate it. I’ve been fortunate enough to build the village around my children that allows me to set the anxiety down, to make sure they get what they need if I can’t provide it, to show them admirable ppl to look up to.
@@Childfree334…my first husband had a massive heart attack and died when our children was 7 and 3. So yes I needed a community around me to help me lessen the impact on my children. My current husband is a big believer in community as well and we have many ppl in ours with all sorts of skills and knowledge that benefit and protect the future generation of the whole community. Only silly idiots like you think only one person can effectively provide everything for anyone.
"I love my kids and enjoy them most times. But if it weren't for my parents being involved and active parents, I'd hate motherhood. " What's saddest is YOU acknowledging you'd HATE a role you're actively creating for yourself. But I'm supposed to know about the passing of your loved ones based on your original comment huh? Or should I inquire...smh
This response was valid a few years ago but now with roe vs wade overturned many women who are 🍇ed or in other toxic situations don't have a choice. The Supreme Court hurt the children more than they negatively affected the mothers
I love how the village is brought up to help support you and your child(ren) but the village has no say in the conception, discipline etc of these child(ren). We know women have been doing majority of the domestic labor, so when they say village they really mean CF women.. single moms could have been a village for one another but it seems no one really want to have a temp. Break just to have to reciprocate. Where as CF women can watch your kid, and was/be guilted to do so because they had the time, money ,resources. You DO NOT have to go through certain things to feel, have an understanding, and empathize. And I think some women can be viewed as apathetic because they chose not to have kids and they didnt want to be viewed as a "villager".
Thank you. I'm an African women, where I live it really takes a village to raise kids. However, I don't think these women know what that entails. It means someone can send your child to the shop without your permission. It means you're told when to conceive & who to conceive with. It means important decisions about the child's future are not just decided by the mom. It means moms don't have to be consulted about a child's discipline. However "the village" is usually a group of moms, not CF women
@LM-he7eb Yea, I just wish more women would think about what they want out of life before kids. And if you want the village there needs to be communication. What you described is similar to how my mom's side of the family was. I'm African-American but looking back it really was the Aunts, and female cousins holding things down
8:20 this comparison doesn't quite cut it. Being a mother isnt something that you need to to do live, unlike working a job. And even with jobs, you can find another job if need be.
I do appreciate the first lady speaking on the anxiety of being a mother. One thing I've said to people with children, I don't have any, is I would be a mess on a consistent basis if I had children. I'm worried about my family constantly. I don't know how I could handle worrying about my own children. I don't know if I could ever say I would regret becoming a parent but again I'm not one. I am more empathetic to the first lady than I am the second lady.
When I saw my mom struggling after divorcing violent dad, when I had no choice but to move away from mom when I was 16 so I wouldnt be burden to her anymore I knew " this is not going to me! lol this is the worst scam ever sold to women! "
Never, ever regret ANYTHING that you do in life. All experiences are to help you to EVOLVE, to raise your Consciousness so that you can become an even BETTER human being and children help you to grow spiritually in leaps and bounds. This is from a mother of two grown children whom I can’t imagine not being a part of my life. 💫🙏🏾💫
That's a lie and foolish advice. You should always regret doing the wrong thing. Being a single mother is wrong. Even God regretted creating humans and destroyed them. So why would you say mother's shouldn't regret when God regretted his children. You are far less intelligent than God? And no, children do not help you grow, bc you will grow without them. They cause you to have a harder life, which is wrong. It's fine to live you children, but don't promote single motherhood as good. It's not and is something to regret.
But if women are never honest about these feelings, future generations aren't given the choice to make informed decisions. Like yes, work through the regret as best you can, but your take keeps this screen of positivity masking the very real, practical, and reasonable issues mothers have. If young girls knew that motherhood is as hard as it is, they could make better decisions and NOT regret. But if you feel like you were deceived by society and made a choice to have kids based solely on messages like the one you left, when they struggle and feel overwhelmed - which is human and natural - they internalize that as if there is something wrong with THEM, not that they were fed a bunch of bs about how amazing motherhood is. If it's good FOR YOU, that's fantastic and I am genuinely happy for you. Your experience is far from universal, though, and expressing regret and being heard is how regret stops from becoming its more toxic incarnation that is shame. Ignoring bad feelings does not make them go away. Women who feel like this deserve to be heard without being told their experiences and feelings are wrong.
@@evergreenforestwitchwhen the future generation of women hear how hard it is, their informed decision will be to never have them. That's what this person is scared of. They don't want women to stop having children bc they want all women to suffer. Clearly if they cared, they would speak to the men and tell them to stop mistreating the mother's.
@evergreenforestwitch Exactly 💯. I couldn't believe the OP actually uttered that first sentence, but thank you for articulating reality so beautifully. ❤
@@Childfree334 Are you going to get mad at her for not regretting her child? Just because your children are unwanted waste of life doesnt mean that she should feel the same way. Pathetic and you all support eaxh other in this foolishness. Keep your digusting legs closed.
The girl with the weird bun is exactly why mothers probably don't like expressing their feelings. She immediately started to judge, when it was almost like she didn't watch the same video. I think that at some point in her watching, a trauma kicked in, and everything that the mothers expressed was heard through her trauma filter, because she obviously doesn't have bad intentions, but she dismissed everything that the mothers said. She heard what she wanted to hear, and made up the rest.
I think I'm not a Mother, I'm just a daughter, but I remember being 18 years old when I had an abortion my mother knew what she first saw me she was so angry she said what if something would have happened to you and all my life she said if you have a child if you get pregnant I will kill you. In the way some of these young mothers who still have kids under the age of 18 speak about their daughters or their sons hurts because it's not fair for my life to be affected and me also possibly being a mother not getting support it was devastating. I feel like I would never want to be a mother like this with me because they hate that they're showing it's a sign that they're not worth it just like the child's not working to you you're not worth being a mother to the child which one is it?
I'm going to come back the further I go into the video but I want to comment from the beginning. I listen to the initial ladies. One regret having to care about her daughter. I'm sorry that's what it is. She doesn't want the burden of caring about her. The next lady basically said she doesn't really want to play I guess or interact playfully with her child. She also mentioned that she can have as much fun as someone 34. So her regret seems to stem from not wanting to have to deal with her child and wanting to go have fun. Next lady commenting stated that everyone makes motherhood out to be great. Where? Where are y'all seeing what everyone makes motherhood out to be great? What you see is mother's loving their children but I've never heard anyone just say motherhood is great. I hear people say being a grandparent is great. But no matter how much people love their kids I really hear someone say motherhood is great. They simply say that they love their children but that their children may be the best thing that ever happened to them because they love them so much.
I think this is coming from a place of selfishness frankly. 'Regret' is a strong word. There is no way you say you regret your friendship but not your friend. It doesn't make sense.
It's a result of forcing people to conform. Hopefully our society will reach a point where we aren't demonizing people who don't want kids or relationships.
You can hate a job, but love the people you work with. Mothers hate the role, not their kids. Idk why this is so hard for some of ya'll to differentiate.
@@LadyAstarionAncunin i rather do no harm in loving kids enough to NOT be a mother ! then hating having them and " loveeee " my kids after the fact ! it does harm no matter how u wanna put it ! they just dont wanna say i hate my kids ! they cant say it with they full chest lol
Complaining about working at Walmart is not the equivalent to complaining about your child on the Internet which is forever. Regardless of you thinking that this is a place for you to vent about the person you gave birth too, it not go to therapy. Protect you child feelings.
It's best to be brutally honest to have these uncomfortable hard conversations from mothers who've been there done that so other women don't make the same mistake and realize they can opt out of participating in motherhood because you know society pressures the shit outta women to have kids.
@@Laquia okay, I didn't say anything against that but read up children that found old blogs or videos by their parents. See how hearing or reading how their parents felt about them messed them up.
@@MsBrentLang You really show no grave to struggling mothers who regret motherhood bases on society's lies and pressures and it shows. Your implication is that parents should keep that TABOO part under the table only to their THERAPISTS and not be honest about it to their kids even in the risks of the possibility of messing up their pysche. At the end of the day it's better for the adult grown child(rens) to know then to NOT know so then they can decide in their adult futures if they want to be a better parent than their mothers who regret motherhood or not be a parent at all. Listen here 🧁 I didn't asked to be born I didn't asked to be born in a dysfunctional toxic abusive family, I didn't ask to be hurt and mistreated as a child, I didn't ask for a sperm donar I don't claim as parental father figure. But you know WTF I asked? That I would never be born to experience those traumatic events growing up. But it's way past too late for that. All I could do is not repeat the same mistake and warm women that motherhood is not what it's cracked up to be despite the Hallmark commercials that paints a perfect picture of it. If you care about the kids who could be hurt by videos like these posted then start warning women young, middle aged, and old the harsh brutal reality of motherhood before they make motherhood their reality only to then end up regretting it. DO THAT!!!! 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
@@MsBrentLangthese mothers didn't say anything about their kids. they talked about motherhood and the role of parenting. Speaking on a role is different than speaking on a personal relationship you have with your child.
My baby sister had her first at 16. I was in college and I was able to help her with babysitting. After I graduated she had two more. Thankfully, I had a flexible job I assisted with cleaning, cooking, feeding them, doctors appointments and infant massage. 🥹 Sadly, children are not born in the world we USED to live In. Women are no longer giving into the societal pressures of having a child. There is also no guarantee they will care for you when you are older. If you are uncertain don’t do it! Babies can sense rejection while in the womb. Peace and love queens. ❤
Often times when a mother says "I love my kids... I hate being a mom" it is easy to question if they actually love their children. It is clear as day they don't like their children. The child made you a mom. If you "loved" your child, wouldn't you like being a mom? I can't even fathom the amount of stress parents go through raising children. There is definitely envy from parents towards adults without children
The point is that in society that these women are all born into these women that are speaking out there were chances to never get pregnant like abstinent not having sex. If you don't want to kid not being involved with the man who doesn't want kids it's like so many things that you could do to avoid having a child but regretting the fact that you have a child which is the point that you don't understand you regretting life which is so against humanity
Ole girl with blue glasses doesn't realize nobody has to listen to you complain about being a Mom either Go find another Mother to care. Wal-Mart workers can quit,yall can't and that choice isn't even comparable. Nice try tho😂
When I was a child observing my mother and other women, I knew I would regret motherhood, so I made the decision at 9 to never have babies. I didn't even play with the dolls I got for my birthdays and Christmas. They just sat on the shelf in my room. I was a bookworm, not interested in playing "house." Now, when my great nieces are born, I make it a point to gift their parents with books and electronics for when they get older. I will never buy a female child a doll, a doll house, a tea set, or any domestic toys. That is just setting them up to live within societal expectations.
@NotGettingWhatIPaidForUA-cam AMEN and Hallelujah to everything you said. It is so true. It does not take actually going through something to realize it is not for you. I can look at the life of drug addicts, alcoholics, and mothers to know I don't want to experience any of that. So I stay away from drugs, alcohol, and had a hysterectomy to ensure my life trajectory was my own choice. I am not letting life just happen to me. Tradition and societal dictates be damned.
I think we need a balance of both. A doll house and a tea set are perfectly acceptable gifts for children of both sexes and so is a technology and books. I got it all. It was wonderful to be a bookworm who also was obsessed with cooking and Barbies. This makes us fully fleshed out human beings capable of all the possibilities ! Actually I think we should normalize giving boys dolls and domestic toys! Listen we humans become great cooks, starting with that play set!
Idk i played with barbies and brats too but they were always young hot girls having fun 😂. Never played family but more so like young women in college or something. Even back then i knew Barbie was not being a mom on her cruise ship. 😂
@@Rodrasroom i would get leapfrog stuff all the time too 😂. Definitely didnt make me into tech though im a therapist lol
@@Spokentruths725 You can't even compare the two though. Getting Leapfrog didn't lead you into tech because there were no societal messages reinforcing that path for you. When girls are given baby dolls, doll houses, and tea sets there are strong societal messages, influences, and pressure reinforcing domesticity for women. Therein lies the difference.
It’s not natural for a woman to take on all that responsibility without proper support
I’ll never forget the day my mom broke down because we were acting so bad, and was shrieking “why did I have children?!” I felt really bad. Also, i thought. Duly noted.
I experienced that, too - more than once. Her situation was really a generational thing. When she was a girl, basically her option was "Find a good man to marry, settle down and have kids, or you'll be an old maid." Once I got older, I could understand her frustration and forgive the hurt, but it definitely had an impact on my choice to remain childless. I often wonder what she would have liked to have done with her life if she hadn't had kids. I'll never know.
I never had kids or wanted them and have not even had a pet since I left my childhood home.
Though, i have an extremely high maintenance career as a cartoonist in the publishing, film, and music industries so ive moved 60 times and toured the world for years. So its not just the fact i had to be mini mom , my survival depends on mobility and flexibility
@OriginalContent89 Can't speak for them, but realizing mom was capable of being hurt and being frustrated, I started seeing less as a mom and more as a separate person.
Both in good and bad ways. While I couldn't name it, her calmness started to feel more distant. I didn't know it was from being overwhelmed and kinda checked out.
I just wondered why teachers and strangers felt more warm. And that I really didn't know much about this person and she won't tell me.
Lack of warmth felt personal, her probably regretting having children, I understood, accepted and never judged her for it.
Sister girl, who didn’t understand the difference between not liking motherhood and not liking kids, needs to LISTEN to what those women ACTUALLY said and not succumb to the trauma her momma gave her. No where did those women say they didn’t like their children. No where.
Yes it was clearly projection based off of her feeling unwanted by her own mother.
She clearly heard what she wanted to hear. Like you said, none of those women implied that they hate their kids. Sounds like sis was projecting and deflect hard.
She Annoyed Me TREMENDOUSLY!!! Not ONE Of Them Even Expressed That AT ALL
I know I’ll regret it. I like to be able to get up & go & sleep in as late as I want on my day off. I’m too selfish to be anyone’s mother.
Agreed ! Same here !
When I was growing up, I didn't see a woman in my family happy about being a mother. I will not have children. If I change my mind adoption, I will be there. Just because you have the equipment to have a baby doesn't mean you should use it.
As someone who was forced into taking a parental role for my nieces and nephews due to negligent parents, I tend to not like the community argument. I do not want responsibility for other people's children when I choose to be child free. I pay my taxes, it is not my fault the government sends that money to Ukraine instead of parental programs like free daycare.
There's a sense of entitlement people with kids have when it comes to child free family. And it's not fair to us. We make the choice not to have a child at the moment and people take advantage of that. This is my worry with the "community" argument. I do believe the nuclear family works too, but modernity has complicated it.
Also, modernity has changed children. It is substantially harder to raise a child now with internet, social media, television, etc. Public school defunding. The kids aren't getting smarter. They're behaving worse and worse. So to put that on other people for the name of "community" isn't fair. We have to take responsibility for our choices, even when it's hard.
If you voted for sleepy Joe, it is your fault.
I feel this....even the possibility of it happening makes me bitter. I just haven't been called to the plate because of distance, if we lived in the same city I'd be screwed....
well said
Some of us never got to even experience womanhood before motherhood
The woman at 10:43 has a point-the parent who *STAYS* always gets the most blame. And women like 5:09 are a part of this problem.
Former nanny and new mom … she needs time to understand. She doesn’t get it.
I’m so glad this convo is happening. The village is gone, a lot of the child free community, grandparents, and dads wanna be optional or dont value kids or don’t want to be involved with children at all. Being a mom is mandatory, non stop.
This right here!!
I Think Grandparents are ok to Be Optional. NEVER FATHERS Tho
Fathers are praised even if dead beats. Moms are never praised unless they're miserable. Don't have children if you like your body and your freedom and sleep. It's 24/7 and nothing is expected from the Dads. If you are a Mom, just do it single, Dads will just drag you down and be another child to care for.
Honestly the whole fathers are praised thing can be stopped with the more current generations. We had to give him praise because we were still heavily conditioned back then. If mom didnt let him play a role when he wanted to then it just made things worse. You can only do so much after the kid is here because most women will still allow a man to be a father even if its a half asses shitty one. I used to be like this with my deadbeat and then i woke up. We grow up thinking we have involved fathers because he isn’t completely gone. Smh
@MsAverageChick I hear you. Although, I NEVER thought men were involved Fathers. Lol! My Dad was a literal Dead Beat posted on The Post Office walls and a pedo. In my experience, most males in the family are pedos. Most girls in my experience SA by their own Father, brother, cousin, uncle, etc. And the elder women did nothing. Blames us. Our own Mothers jealous of a toddler because her man wants a child. I used to only hang out with males because the female elders were dangerous to girls. For me, men weren't the problem - the women who protected them were - mainly their Mothers and wives. So, whatever our elder women were, they were soldiers for the men's member above all. Their daughters harmed, jealousy, not help. All the elders need to go, then the world will have a chance. It's the elder women holding up the churches that say believe women are less than. If women stopped pushing the male religions it would all stop now. They refuse so the only solution is all the elders must be no more. They're toxic as bleep.
@@juliebella1221 i 100% agree but they arent ready for this conversation. I seen it in my own family as well. Yes the pedo is committing the act but they get so much further in life with enablers. My grandmother still feels the need to take care of her pedo brother whenever something happens to him and im over here waiting on him to take his last breath. They hide behind being evil with religion and this do not judge mentality. Yes if they weren’t so male centered many of us would have been protected. This was the only reason i gave my deadbeat any credit. The women in my family also encouraged a one sided relationship and ignored all of his shady acts because “thats my father” smh. Im not having kids but if i do they will not be subjected to this.
@@Spokentruths725 👏👏👏Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. Times a go zillion. My brother's side of the family had girls for the male family members to pass around without the complication of the law; not that the po po did anything when they found out. They had to outlaw marrying cousins, it's so rampant. They SA girls so young, they murder whoever she would've been and all that's left is a zombie walking. Around the world you look and you're like, you do all the cooking???? Then why are any of the men who abuse still alive? How they don't see that it is the elder women keeping them enslaved, not the men, is beyond me. I don't listen to elders and I never have. They always seemed to be the most dangerous and the cruelest. I don't talk to my Mother anymore, but the last time I did, she was still a slave to the male member. Her comment was, "I am still 'bleepable.'" Still dieting because men basically want men with long hair and make up to bleep - that's why they push being thin so much - majority are not straight and loathe women. Their pleasure is our pain. It's just that simple. It's beyond gross, but it's just that simple. It's why they laugh so when we cry.
These broken dolls for dollars, of elder women need to go, need to be no more. Me having pity for them, me saying, oh well, I don't know your childhood, so I'll give you a pass. That ALL changed when I had a child. If you do have one, be prepared, ALL trauma is remembered every year your child grows. Flashbacks, it's horrible. It's the worst. You realize you just stuffed it all way down. The love for your child will have you loathing your own family members and close friends. You look at your little bundle of innocence and joy and think, HOW, HOW could you let them. I'd die for my child in a heartbeat. I would literally fight to the death and resurrect myself and keep fighting for her. Majority of my friends and family had to be cut off when I became a Mom. You realize how many of your friends tolerate that crap, like in Promising Young Girl, it's so rampant what men get away with, apathy is the order of the day, even when it's their own family members. It's vile. I don't recommend having a child in this day and age; 2 plus 2 = 5 now. No joke. So you'd have to homeschool for sure. And, now the world can really hurt you; they get to your through your child and it sucks. You give birth to your heart and your heart walks around outside your body and you want to say, get back in, it's dangerous out here. LOL!!
Being a Mom:
If you've ever seen in the wild, the impala running a circle around her baby for hours, to keep her baby safe, and the lion is patiently sitting nearby waiting for her to tire.
@@juliebella1221 beautiful statement about being a mom and once again i agree. You sound like an amazing mother and I know your child will love and appreciate all you do. You actually are doing your best and not making excuses like others. People like you show me having kids can be okay. I hope for the best for you and your little one ❤️.
Motherhood is a pointless endeavour
I regret motherhood and understand why mothers do. women were never created to sacrifice for children. Women are supposed to be compensated and helped, but we aren't, so it needs to end. Motherhood has become oppression.
Amen. I wholeheartedly agree. When I see pregnant women, it just makes me sad😔 because of the evil world those innocent babies are being born into. Most of them will be the next generation of suffering wage slaves, drug addicts, and criminals. 😢
@@Childfree334 agreed. My heart hurts for the suffering this world is going to cause them. They will probably have to live in tents and work 3 and 4 jobs to have one. And don't get me started on the school system.
💯💯💯
@@Childfree334 glad im not the only one. I hardly feel happy for people who are pregnant. Especially the ones I know who are a mess. They contribute to the problem.
@@Spokentruths725 9 times our of 10 the pregnant women are single, poor, have a toxic relationship with the sperm donor, are morally bankrupt, have no support system, is a substance abuser, or really doesn't want a kid. They are just having the kid to get government assistance or to have old age caretakers. 😢
5:43 these Women NEVER said they hated kids. Nor do childless people constantly go around saying they hate kids. She’s projecting and she should probably speak to her mother about it or go to counseling
Exactly
Some people just seem dedicated to misunderstanding what people say. I did not hear that woman say she hated her kids, so unless hlshe is taking in general, how the heck did that woman around 5:09 come up with that😐🙄. You can hate your job but love the field you are in or love your co workers, etc.
I made a similar comment about my job and my cousin took it as a means to downplay a 9-5. He was like “see this is why I can’t have regular hours” mind you he still lives with his parents at 27. 😂 you can definitely have two opposing feelings at once.
5:26 the truth is often unpleasant and leaves bad feelings for the person who doesn’t want to be aware of the other persons feelings.
Raising kids was never meant to be done in this strict Western “nuclear family” setup.
From infant stage to about five women will be doing the bulk of childrearing and this was why many cultures always had extended family to help these women in the community when they had children.
I like being a mom, but I absolutely HATE being a working mom. As a teacher and a mom, the parenting was neverending and it made me miserable. If i had to do it better, I would only be a SAHM. So, my advice to women is, choose/find a provider if you want to have an enjoyable experience as a mom.
The woman at the 9-minute mark hit the nail on the head. Would these women regret motherhood if they had more help at home. So much of the stress outside of worrying about your children which will never go away, is that women don't have enough help at home. And I am talking about even when you are married or in a relationship and have a partner. Women take on the bulk of the responsibility I'm talking 80-90% or more.
It took my 30 yrs old male partner 2 consultations, 450 $ and 20 minutes procedure to be sterilised.
However doctors won't let 30 yrs old woman like me to have sterilisation, only birth controls wich is so fucked up !!!!
5:39 she's the slow one in the back who didn't understand not one person said they hated their kids or don't like kids. Saying that something is hard isn't saying that they hate doing it.
Regret implies hate.
@@heathers432No it doesn't but maybe for you it does.
5:09 she missed the point *entirely* .
Completely
Completely missed it.
Yep. She was so wrapped up in what her own mom said that she ignored what the lady in the original video was saying.
No. She just doesn’t agree. She’s allowed to see it how she wants just like the ones who want to publicly announce that they hate motherhood. She had a mom like this and so she knows how it feels to be regretted. I have a lot of empathy for her.
@@heathers432She definitely missed the point. These women don't hate kids, they hate the emotional, physical, mental, financial drain that is motherhood and is never ending. Two totally different things.
I have 1 kid, but it wasn't planned. It's not great but, she cool
As a godmother of three beautiful goddaughters I would never buy them a doll unless the doll had a career in hand like Doctor McStuffins that was the first doll I bought one of my goddaughters being a mother is not for everyone being a mother is not the end all gold standing ten toes down in your immediate reality and learning to love on yourself should be gold number 1 knowing your self worth!
🤔🤔🤔 that's deep
The woman at 8:45 is partially correct. Would women regret motherhood if the fathers were pulling equal weight in childcare and the domestic management is a valid question that needs to be answered and resolved before invoking a village. Because as it stands, mothers want a village because the fathers are not pulling their weight and all that would mean is draining free labor from the women around them who have their own lives to be free childcare servants who are to stay silent. And the invocation of a village only starts up when the subject is delegating the responsibilities of raising children to others, but no discussion on what else the village does and how parents see themselves as part of a village. A big reason why mothers are so isolated is that they want free help around the clock, but then use those same children that other people are taking care of as to why they're not going to help others in the village.
Grrrrrlllll you said a word bcuz I been saying this. The same women that stay hollering about a village ain’t never around to offer assistance or care for anybody else. Ironically enough using those same kids as to why they can’t contribute nothing. And the village never includes any other kids but theirs.
CF Women are awake to the bs and when we stood up and said we were done being worked like mules it wasn’t just in relation to men. Women, especially blk women, are used as domestic mules in their own families.
YES YES YES YES YES YES
I'm an African women, & here it really takes a village to raise kids. However, I don't think American women know what that entails. It means someone can send your child to the shop without your permission. It means you're told when to conceive & who to conceive with. It means important decisions about the child's future are not just decided by the mom. It means others can discipline your child without your permission. It means being there for others
Watching these videos really let’s me know I made the right decision to never ever ever have kids. I don’t even want a dog. I just hit 41. I made that decision at 12 in my home economics class. Nope 👎🏾.
Am glad for you sis go on be happy and live your best life
I love motherhood. Having my baby made me a better person, helped me heal, grow and gives me strength. Its hard don’t get me wrong but I would never regret it not ever
The lady with the white T-shirt on that says" Wake Breastfeed Hustle" broke it all the way DOWN... Especially the part about when your child should be talking and potty trained!
I’m a mom of 3 with 1 on the way.
It’s not my personality. It’s just a role I participate in. I am ME first and foremost. That will never change.
I love my kids and enjoy them most times. But if it wasn’t for my parents being involved and active grandparents, I’d hate motherhood. If it wasn’t for the understanding that I need time away from my kids regularly in order to recharge using self care, I would hate it.
I’ve been fortunate enough to build the village around my children that allows me to set the anxiety down, to make sure they get what they need if I can’t provide it, to show them admirable ppl to look up to.
"To make sure they get what they need if I can't provide it" Yet, you keep having kids. 😮
@@Childfree334that part. This is sad
@@Childfree334…my first husband had a massive heart attack and died when our children was 7 and 3. So yes I needed a community around me to help me lessen the impact on my children.
My current husband is a big believer in community as well and we have many ppl in ours with all sorts of skills and knowledge that benefit and protect the future generation of the whole community.
Only silly idiots like you think only one person can effectively provide everything for anyone.
@@aylanae4797… yes. Dealing with death in families is sad. But what’s sadder is your assumptions and limited understanding of what I said.
"I love my kids and enjoy them most times. But if it weren't for my parents being involved and active parents, I'd hate motherhood. " What's saddest is YOU acknowledging you'd HATE a role you're actively creating for yourself. But I'm supposed to know about the passing of your loved ones based on your original comment huh? Or should I inquire...smh
If it’s so hard why do it? You’re not doing yourself or your child any favors
This response was valid a few years ago but now with roe vs wade overturned many women who are 🍇ed or in other toxic situations don't have a choice. The Supreme Court hurt the children more than they negatively affected the mothers
I love how the village is brought up to help support you and your child(ren) but the village has no say in the conception, discipline etc of these child(ren).
We know women have been doing majority of the domestic labor, so when they say village they really mean CF women.. single moms could have been a village for one another but it seems no one really want to have a temp. Break just to have to reciprocate. Where as CF women can watch your kid, and was/be guilted to do so because they had the time, money ,resources.
You DO NOT have to go through certain things to feel, have an understanding, and empathize. And I think some women can be viewed as apathetic because they chose not to have kids and they didnt want to be viewed as a "villager".
Thank you. I'm an African women, where I live it really takes a village to raise kids. However, I don't think these women know what that entails. It means someone can send your child to the shop without your permission. It means you're told when to conceive & who to conceive with. It means important decisions about the child's future are not just decided by the mom. It means moms don't have to be consulted about a child's discipline.
However "the village" is usually a group of moms, not CF women
@LM-he7eb Yea, I just wish more women would think about what they want out of life before kids. And if you want the village there needs to be communication. What you described is similar to how my mom's side of the family was. I'm African-American but looking back it really was the Aunts, and female cousins holding things down
8:20 this comparison doesn't quite cut it. Being a mother isnt something that you need to to do live, unlike working a job. And even with jobs, you can find another job if need be.
That part. Plus unless so a**Ault took place you also choose your partner can't choose your co workers🫣 can't fire them either i.e. ( get rid of)
I do appreciate the first lady speaking on the anxiety of being a mother. One thing I've said to people with children, I don't have any, is I would be a mess on a consistent basis if I had children. I'm worried about my family constantly. I don't know how I could handle worrying about my own children. I don't know if I could ever say I would regret becoming a parent but again I'm not one. I am more empathetic to the first lady than I am the second lady.
I never understand this, it is obvious that parent hood is going to be extremely hard, childbirth etc is awful, parents just don't think
When I saw my mom struggling after divorcing violent dad, when I had no choice but to move away from mom when I was 16 so I wouldnt be burden to her anymore
I knew " this is not going to me! lol this is the worst scam ever sold to women! "
Never, ever regret ANYTHING that you do in life. All experiences are to help you to EVOLVE,
to raise your Consciousness so that you can become an even BETTER human being and children help you to grow spiritually in leaps and bounds.
This is from a mother of two grown children whom I can’t imagine not being a part of my life. 💫🙏🏾💫
That's a lie and foolish advice. You should always regret doing the wrong thing. Being a single mother is wrong. Even God regretted creating humans and destroyed them. So why would you say mother's shouldn't regret when God regretted his children. You are far less intelligent than God?
And no, children do not help you grow, bc you will grow without them. They cause you to have a harder life, which is wrong. It's fine to live you children, but don't promote single motherhood as good. It's not and is something to regret.
"Never, ever regret ANYTHING that you do in life." Seriously?? 😂😂😂😂
But if women are never honest about these feelings, future generations aren't given the choice to make informed decisions. Like yes, work through the regret as best you can, but your take keeps this screen of positivity masking the very real, practical, and reasonable issues mothers have. If young girls knew that motherhood is as hard as it is, they could make better decisions and NOT regret. But if you feel like you were deceived by society and made a choice to have kids based solely on messages like the one you left, when they struggle and feel overwhelmed - which is human and natural - they internalize that as if there is something wrong with THEM, not that they were fed a bunch of bs about how amazing motherhood is. If it's good FOR YOU, that's fantastic and I am genuinely happy for you. Your experience is far from universal, though, and expressing regret and being heard is how regret stops from becoming its more toxic incarnation that is shame. Ignoring bad feelings does not make them go away. Women who feel like this deserve to be heard without being told their experiences and feelings are wrong.
@@evergreenforestwitchwhen the future generation of women hear how hard it is, their informed decision will be to never have them. That's what this person is scared of. They don't want women to stop having children bc they want all women to suffer. Clearly if they cared, they would speak to the men and tell them to stop mistreating the mother's.
@evergreenforestwitch Exactly 💯. I couldn't believe the OP actually uttered that first sentence, but thank you for articulating reality so beautifully. ❤
no i will not help u raise yo lil kidssss 😂
I never wanted a baby while pregnant but once he was born I loved him so much and don’t regret it at all.
This is a video about women REGRETTING motherhood. You say you don't regret it, yet you are here. 😏
Okay. What do you want us to do with that information?
Lucky for you. What if it wasnt the case and u end up hating your kid. You should never have kids except youre sure
@@Childfree334 Are you going to get mad at her for not regretting her child? Just because your children are unwanted waste of life doesnt mean that she should feel the same way. Pathetic and you all support eaxh other in this foolishness. Keep your digusting legs closed.
Mother's regret Motherhood because of how sick this world is ... who wants their precious innocent child here ...
The girl with the weird bun is exactly why mothers probably don't like expressing their feelings.
She immediately started to judge, when it was almost like she didn't watch the same video. I think that at some point in her watching, a trauma kicked in, and everything that the mothers expressed was heard through her trauma filter, because she obviously doesn't have bad intentions, but she dismissed everything that the mothers said. She heard what she wanted to hear, and made up the rest.
I think I'm not a Mother, I'm just a daughter, but I remember being 18 years old when I had an abortion my mother knew what she first saw me she was so angry she said what if something would have happened to you and all my life she said if you have a child if you get pregnant I will kill you. In the way some of these young mothers who still have kids under the age of 18 speak about their daughters or their sons hurts because it's not fair for my life to be affected and me also possibly being a mother not getting support it was devastating. I feel like I would never want to be a mother like this with me because they hate that they're showing it's a sign that they're not worth it just like the child's not working to you you're not worth being a mother to the child which one is it?
Ur heart is outside ur body
The kids are in school most of the time.
I'm going to come back the further I go into the video but I want to comment from the beginning. I listen to the initial ladies. One regret having to care about her daughter. I'm sorry that's what it is. She doesn't want the burden of caring about her. The next lady basically said she doesn't really want to play I guess or interact playfully with her child. She also mentioned that she can have as much fun as someone 34. So her regret seems to stem from not wanting to have to deal with her child and wanting to go have fun. Next lady commenting stated that everyone makes motherhood out to be great. Where? Where are y'all seeing what everyone makes motherhood out to be great? What you see is mother's loving their children but I've never heard anyone just say motherhood is great. I hear people say being a grandparent is great. But no matter how much people love their kids I really hear someone say motherhood is great. They simply say that they love their children but that their children may be the best thing that ever happened to them because they love them so much.
13:02 she said it's what it is
I think this is coming from a place of selfishness frankly. 'Regret' is a strong word. There is no way you say you regret your friendship but not your friend. It doesn't make sense.
Yet, mothers are forced to be the most selfless person. They do it all with or without help. Yet, get no appreciation and not expecting appreciation.
EXACTLY! You can’t regret motherhood without regretting the kids. Period!
It's a result of forcing people to conform. Hopefully our society will reach a point where we aren't demonizing people who don't want kids or relationships.
It makes sense to me. You love the person but hate the role. You don’t hate the person.
@@Nimbithefallen5326 It makes sense to me too. I can see what they mean. It's so frustrating when people see things in black and white.
Most women like it raw unfortunately that's how mothers are made.
people be like i hate motherhood but they love they kids ! 😒 🙄 your a mother because of yo kid its synonymous
You can hate a job, but love the people you work with. Mothers hate the role, not their kids. Idk why this is so hard for some of ya'll to differentiate.
@@YourMajesty143 i disagree ! i think it sounds really silly
I love kids, but I'll never be a mother, so I can understand the reverse.
@@YourMajesty143 you can have a job without other employees ! but you can never be a mother without having kids !! try again
@@LadyAstarionAncunin i rather do no harm in loving kids enough to NOT be a mother ! then hating having them and " loveeee " my kids after the fact ! it does harm no matter how u wanna put it ! they just dont wanna say i hate my kids ! they cant say it with they full chest lol
Complaining about working at Walmart is not the equivalent to complaining about your child on the Internet which is forever. Regardless of you thinking that this is a place for you to vent about the person you gave birth too, it not go to therapy. Protect you child feelings.
It's best to be brutally honest to have these uncomfortable hard conversations from mothers who've been there done that so other women don't make the same mistake and realize they can opt out of participating in motherhood because you know society pressures the shit outta women to have kids.
@@Laquia okay, I didn't say anything against that but read up children that found old blogs or videos by their parents. See how hearing or reading how their parents felt about them messed them up.
@@MsBrentLang You really show no grave to struggling mothers who regret motherhood bases on society's lies and pressures and it shows.
Your implication is that parents should keep that TABOO part under the table only to their THERAPISTS and not be honest about it to their kids even in the risks of the possibility of messing up their pysche.
At the end of the day it's better for the adult grown child(rens) to know then to NOT know so then they can decide in their adult futures if they want to be a better parent than their mothers who regret motherhood or not be a parent at all.
Listen here 🧁 I didn't asked to be born I didn't asked to be born in a dysfunctional toxic abusive family, I didn't ask to be hurt and mistreated as a child, I didn't ask for a sperm donar I don't claim as parental father figure.
But you know WTF I asked?
That I would never be born to experience those traumatic events growing up. But it's way past too late for that. All I could do is not repeat the same mistake and warm women that motherhood is not what it's cracked up to be despite the Hallmark commercials that paints a perfect picture of it.
If you care about the kids who could be hurt by videos like these posted then start warning women young, middle aged, and old the harsh brutal reality of motherhood before they make motherhood their reality only to then end up regretting it.
DO THAT!!!! 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
@@MsBrentLangthese mothers didn't say anything about their kids. they talked about motherhood and the role of parenting. Speaking on a role is different than speaking on a personal relationship you have with your child.
Twitter???
Stop doing it then 😂
My baby sister had her first at 16. I was in college and I was able to help her with babysitting. After I graduated she had two more. Thankfully, I had a flexible job I assisted with cleaning, cooking, feeding them, doctors appointments and infant massage. 🥹 Sadly, children are not born in the world we USED to live In. Women are no longer giving into the societal pressures of having a child. There is also no guarantee they will care for you when you are older. If you are uncertain don’t do it! Babies can sense rejection while in the womb. Peace and love queens. ❤
Often times when a mother says "I love my kids... I hate being a mom" it is easy to question if they actually love their children. It is clear as day they don't like their children.
The child made you a mom. If you "loved" your child, wouldn't you like being a mom? I can't even fathom the amount of stress parents go through raising children. There is definitely envy from parents towards adults without children
The point is that in society that these women are all born into these women that are speaking out there were chances to never get pregnant like abstinent not having sex. If you don't want to kid not being involved with the man who doesn't want kids it's like so many things that you could do to avoid having a child but regretting the fact that you have a child which is the point that you don't understand you regretting life which is so against humanity
Ole girl with blue glasses doesn't realize nobody has to listen to you complain about being a Mom either
Go find another Mother to care. Wal-Mart workers can quit,yall can't and that choice isn't even comparable. Nice try tho😂
Her point is people are allowed to complain even if they put themselves in that position