For those wondering what the note says: “Our daughter, Jingzhi, was born at 10am on the 24th day of the seventh month of the lunar calendar, 1995. We have been forced by poverty and affairs of the world to abandon her. Oh, pity the hearts of fathers and mothers far and near! Thank you for saving our little daughter and taking her into your care. If the heavens have feelings, if we are brought together by fate, then let us meet again on the Broken Bridge in Hangzhou on the morning of the Qixi Festival in 10 or 20 years from now.”
Holo A I know right..? I’m honestly glad the story ended this way, that’s probably the best ending we can ever ask for. So many choices can be made differently and things would not turn out as good as this, ever.
I lost it and cried when her parents gave her the red packet full of 20 years of money. Red packets is a custom, older married relatives will always give the younger generation red packets. This means every chinese new year, they put aside money and saved red packets for her. Every year they were thinking of her, probably prepared two red packets - one for her sister and one for her - and saved it for their younger daughter, hoping to give it to her one day. The level of thoughtfulness and love for their daughter completely blows my mind.
It hit me hard too, as a chinese this is the ultimate point where I truly believe that her parents suffered so much, they really want to raise her, but somehow this is the best decision. I can't imagine in that position ever.
It's so strange to think that thousands of girls have similar stories. I'm also adopted from China and raised in the US. My parents told me from the beginning, "your biological parents loved you so much and sacrificed their lives to give you up and give you a chance for a better life". Although I was never interested in finding my biological parents, I believe they really did love me and had no option bc of the 1 child policy.
@@minialex1354 umm her older sister is a girl so obviously the family did not care about whether their children were a boy or a girl, but rather this was forced upon them due to the one child policy
We Chinese people are CCP‘s slaves！We have nothing rights！We‘re terriblely hard to make our life better！The world don't know real China because CCP shows a fake China to the world！I ran away to US！But I'm still sad about our people！ CCP is Evil！
@@minialex1354 I was an unwanted daughter born to one child China. I can tell you with 100% certainty that the birth parents in this documentary absolutely wanted her, because they did the exact opposite to what my parents did to me. I wish my parents showed half their amount of love and compassion as these folks.
fact that her dad lived across the globe and thought of her every day and felt so much love and guilt, while some dads live in same city as their kids and dont give a shit, is just heartbreaking
DIONOND GIRL - It was very selfish on their part, but they were afraid that the daughter they had raised since a baby would be taken away by the government (either US or China) and given back. It’s happened before. After the fear subsided, it was clear that they just didn’t want to share her. So many chances lost for Katy to learn more about her culture (like why wasn’t she sent to Chinese language school throughout her childhood like other adoptees, so she kept line to her past), so many chances lost for her adoptive parents to prepare Katy to love both sets of parents. In the end I hope Katy fully forgives her adoptive parents. That will make this a truly happy ending.
one minor translation error here. When they're at the video chat, after Kati's biological mother said "thank you", she didn't just say "for taking care of Kati" but "for raising her to become such a wonderful child."
Jenny Ng I noticed it too and I’m glad I’m not the only one bothered by it.. what Kati’s biological mother said had so much more meaning than what was translated and it’s so upsetting that the meaning got lost in translation :(
I don't blame whoever was translating for that. It's hard to translate accurately on the spot in such an emotional moment with cameras pointing everywhere.
Yeah,they did raise an intelligent and kind hearted little girl that's growing into a fine young woman for sure and absolutely beautiful. Heck, she didn't even so much as have a bad word even come out of her mouth like at all so you can very much tell she was raised right,yet so many people hate on America and us american families. It just all depends on who you're,who and how you're raised around and where you're raised because it's very different everywhere and what other countries don't know either is that here in America it's also like being in several different countries depending on where you're at and where you go. People on the east Coast are extremely different from those of the west Coast and then you've the mid west and then the south where I was born n raised and all are completely different in every way.
@@weloveyoona693I was adopted twice as a child. Americans have no idea what they’re doing. “Least she made it ok” shouldn’t be the default. At least these people were so good as to “let” her reconnect with her biological family. Not all of us are so lucky.
Can we talk about how considerate the biological parents were? That, despite the heartache they already had, they were willing to wait TEN to TWENTY YEARS so that the adoptive parents might get comfortable with the idea. And you can see on their faces that they were thinking about her every day of their lives. I don't think any of us can imagine that kind of pain.
Definitely!! The adoptive mother on the other hand seemed to be more worried about what she wants than the child’s feelings 🙄 a bit disturbing how she was trivializing everything
As an adoptee from China myself, this definitely hits home. It's so interesting to see how us adoptees ended up and also to see the similarities. I hope that one day, I will find my biological parents as well.
I hope you will too. I’m sorry for what you’ve had to go through and for how difficult it must be to be searching for your biological family. I wish you well on this difficult journey ❤
Biological parents gave their responsibility to foster parents. Without the foster parents, the child is already dead because the biological parents do not want the child
This is such an amazing and beautiful story … "meet on the broken bridge," … it is a privilege to hear the roots of this reunion and to watch the unfolding of the overwhelmingly intense emotions. On the bridge it felt like there were too many cameras and mom's blubbering mess was understandable and a bit comical... daughter was a bit like "what the heck?" :-) THIS one is a happy account, but it gnaws at the global anguish of parent/child love.
Kati was so open and forgiving - she never blamed her biological parents and wanted to meet them with open arms. Wow. And kudos to the adoptive parents for their unwavering love and support, they're amazing too! This is moving and impactful. Glad there was a happy ending.
Meanwhile, if it was me, I would want my child to know it was loved and where it came from. Because I have met many adopted kids. They wonder where they are from. About their background.
I feel for everyone here. Adoptive parents were afraid to lose their daughter, biological parents were heartbroken, and Katie is stuck in the middle. At least she knows that she was loved. That is all we hope for.
@@justvibing2171 they should have told her the first time, when she was 10. She actually had loving parents, she wasn't just discarded like trash. Imagine she had a depressive personality and had killed herself during adolescence because she imagined her biological parents just dumped her. "We were afraid she wasn't ready" is a bullshit excuse, hiding the truth could also have played out horribly. They weren't afraid she wasn't ready, they were afraid because _they_ weren't ready. While I can totally understand the fear the adoptive parents must have felt of possibly losing their child after bonding for 10 years I wouldn't be shocked if she had rejected them once she found out they had _actively_ hidden the truth from her. They took a huge bet that she would forgive them when she eventually found out.
@@justvibing2171 they knew she had loveing bio parents out there and the fact the adoptive parent said we were afarid tonlose her. Selfish parents not thinking about how she would feel
I didn't realize this the first time I watched it, but the biological dad calls her American parents her "parents" not "adoptive parents". It's so subtle, but it just shows how sweet and grateful they really are.
The biological dad won my heart. How expressive he is of his love and regret. And the fact that like every Asian dad, he too likes to text his children Goodnight and Good morning. I loved this.
I was just watching a short documentary on the scale of the tragedy of the one child policy. Millions of people who have no siblings, no aunts or uncles, no extended family. The pressure that an only child feels knowing they have to care for their grandparents and parents. There aren’t a lot of girls and women because men were the ones to carry on the family name or work the fields. But that also means there are a lot of single men who will never marry. Millions of girls who were adopted by parents in other countries and the emotional toll it took on their parents to have to give them up. It was heartbreaking and really put into perspective the terrible impact it had on people.
My god she is so beautiful. She has her mothers face and fathers complexion. Her birthparents can't keep their hands off her, it's so sweet. And how her mother calls her "baby". The love never left, but she looks overwhelmed by it.
In China, calling their own child "baobei", which, in fact, means "precious" is equal to addressing kids "honey" in spite of age differences. I don't "baobei" should be translated as "baby" even though oftentimes younger parents do suppose the English word "baby" can be translated into "baobei".
I think (maybe I'm wrong, and they were just nervous because of the cameras) she is not used to much contact, I mean hugging and touching, because when I see her with her adoptive parents, their hug her but like in a soft way, I'm latina we are used to demonstrate care and love for friends and family with hugs, kiss touch, im not saying that her parents don't love her, but maybe, because of their culture, they aren't big huggers, if she were my daughter after such trip I would hug her more effusively, so I understand if she feels odd or overwhelmed with her birth parents demonstration of love, besides she didn't feel that longing for 20 years like her China parents did, she wanted to Know but she was raised with love, her birth parents waited and wondered for her for 20 years
The mom crying and the girl not knowing what to do or how to act. It's so hard to watch. As a mother, I can only imagine the pain that poor woman must be feeling. But to her daughter - she is a stranger. But to the mother, the daughter is a piece of her heart. A piece that was missing for so many years.
Adopted parents are more attachable when a child is brought up in a western culture where English language has become her mother tongue. As a 20 year old adopted daughter from an American family meeting her biological parents for the first time, she is more confused when she could not understand what her parents were talking.
Maybe it was a beautiful, not too painful moment either, like not every birth is hard. Humans have given birth in random places for thousands of years so it's pretty natural. I don't know i just prefer to think that it was not so bad.
@Channie Kun, and if they had given birth in a hospital they would have to sign the papers and get everything sorted. Which would be more struggling for both of them and their families. They have their reasons.
Being an adoptive parent is so difficult. You walk a very thin line. I don't think they get enough credit. People will always have something to say. Make sure you keep the kid close to their culture, make sure they know the language, make sure they learn their history. All the while, people forget how difficult it is raising a child as is.
Did you see the biological mum break down in this video? How can you blab after that how hard it is for adoptive parents. What an insensitive soul you must be.
Yeah but imagine giving your biological child up for adoption. People act like adoptive parents are saints or wtf but really, they were banking on a woman giving up her child in order to become parents. ISNT THAT QUESTIONABLE?
Maybe, but in this case they knew the agony of the birth parents and were selfish enough to ignore it. Kati was a US citizen by that point, it’s not like she would’ve been forced to stay in China after a legal adoption. It’s a kind of white parents that really make my blood boil imo. They erased her connection to her culture and hid her birth parents from her.
They made sure to keep the exact amount of lucky money each year that her sister received, because they truly loved their children equally even if they were only able to raise one.
As for the lucky money the father gave to Kati, it's composed of different versions, the black and white cash was used in the 1990s, the red one is used since 2000s, so I believe the parents really saved money to their abandonned daughter on every Chinese New Year. As a Chinese, I think her Chinese father is an intellectual, the sentences in letter he left to his daughter was kind of an old literature style of Chinese that only educated people can write, and he used a old style writing brush to write the letter, and his writing is pretty good, which also shows that he was well educated.
qqd dfsd I’m glad to know this backstory. I was 99.9999% sure the dad was sincere when he said it, but that 0.0001% part of me wondered if he had just put it together at the last minute. I’m glad to see more evidence in favor of the former, which about clinches it for me
Actually, the language barrier works as a defense mechanism in the beginning. It’s already an overwhelming meeting. Having to speak 24-7 would make it more difficult. Looks like she had a translator with her though.
Anyone who would criticise the biological parents does not understand the situation in China at that time. The biological parents did not have an abortion as they were required to do, they took incredible risks and defied a ruthless tyrannical government, and they gave their precious little girl the only gift that they could give her, her life. They have suffered terribly ever since parting with their precious little girl, their only consolation being that they know that their precious little girl is alive. I am so glad that they got to see their daughter as a young woman, and they can know that their suffering was worth it.
Exactly! Because of oppression of 2 child limit, there were countless abortions of many births, especially female babies. Infanticide was rampant because male infants are to keep their lineage prolonged. Now what? Many towns and villages suffer the imbalance.....too many males and not enough females. Perhaps now it's laxed and hoping....hoping..
I think her adoptive parents were just terrified of losing her and unfortunately this created an environment where she didn't feel comfortable asking about her adoption.
Yes, they purposely kept her in the dark even though at a young age they knew she was very curious, stacking up boxes to get to the letters and information about her adoption, come on, the fact her real parents appreciate that they took care of her is why she forgave them
The fact Katy is their only daughter created that feeling. Should her adopted family had another (biological) daughter, the feeling of "losing a daughter" would not be that strong and got in the way.
@@GG-kn2se Obviously they meant biological parents, chill. It's more about how her adoptive parents never mentioned it and sort of prevented her from knowing about it until she was 20 when she had always shown that she was curious about her adoption, including the story of when she was young and asked her mom about "who's tummy she came from" and how she would climb boxes trying to get to the one that had her adoption information that was hidden from her. Not that I'm saying her adoptive parents made a bad call, cause there's a lot of complicated feelings when someone is in that situation that I can't speak on, but both your comments are pretty rude for no reason lol
I could understand the mother, the father speaks in a dialect that I’m not familiar with. But their anguish was obvious. And when they pulled out the lucky money, it had me crying. That’s what parents do every new year for their children.
what a surprise! i understand the father clearly but it’s harder for me to understand the mother. perhaps the dad has southern dialect and the mother is more northern?
@@eileengarfield hmm, could be. I could understand both, but maybe the father less. It feels unusual to be able understand what Kati, if things were different, could've understood directly from her biological parent's mouth...
Iam asian. That pocket money reminds me when my parents gave me a big chunk of gold worth $80,000 when i married the one i love. I never knew they have that much money because we are just an average family (almost poor). It was a 30 years saving. I was crying a river, and i realized they always thinking about me and my sister. i accepted it to respect them even tho i didn’t want to. But i use the money to help them a lot on their old days. Iam a blessed daughter.
Asian cultures such as the Chinese, Korean, and Japanese have the greatest respect for their elderely and familial bonds. Wish it's something the West would practice more...
Carlos Fierro Yeah and also Filipino, at weddings we give them the “shower of coins” it’s basically we throw gold coins at their feet to bloom love, youth and sincerity.
If you are blaming families then you are not understanding the story. If you are blaming the adoptive parents then you do not understand love. If you are blaming the real parents then you do not understand history. This story is beautiful and I’m sure that Kati will continue to cultivate both sides of the family because of the overwhelming love they have for her.
jfeather503 i agree, don't blame either family in a situation like this. Like there's no ONE right way to handle something in a serious of a situation as this
and Kati has grown up to be a smart, understanding and wonderful person who has brought both the families togather so that nobody will loose anything or her
I'm a Chinese American and I've watched this before, and remembered the story so I found myself watching it again. Without fail, it reduces me to tears. Kati is incredibly loved by both sets of parents. Her father particularly struck me with his unyielding tenderness. Hopefully she continues maintaining a strong connection with her biological family, and get to spend some time with her sister as well since she grew up not having one. Kudos to the adoptive parents too for raising her to be a healthy adult.
For those of you saying she looks awkward and uncomfortable, she probably is! She has never met these people and spent any days with them even though they are supposed to be her close parents. This isn’t some cheesy movie, it isn’t all butterflies and rainbows when you first meet your biological parents. You don’t immediately establish some kind of long lost bond as if you knew them your entire life just because they are related. Sure you might feel emotion and a connection but they are still basically strangers. It is really hard to try to be fully comfortable with people she’s just met, but I’m sure she is trying. Also keep in mind she doesn’t speak chinese so...it can get awkward with the language barrier when she can’t really express herself or understand them. But I’m sure she is trying very hard to spend good time with them, it’s just not easy!
howtopasstime this is totally what I got from their first meeting. It's an emotionally charged situation for everyone and the language barrier just makes it more difficult. It can't be easy on either side to have to wait for the translator to relay everything - no one really wants to talk about such personal matters through another person.
Yes exactly! And it makes it really difficult when someone is showing such affection for you when you can't understand what they're saying as well. Even with an interpreter, they won't necessarily interpret everything.
howtopasstime very sweetly and well stated! I totally agree! She is not a parent and until she becomes one she can only relate as a child. I can not imagine the pain and guilt that her biological parents have lived with. You can clearly see that it has been immensely torturous on them! My heart goes out to them and her sister. My heart equally goes out for her adoptive parents who clearly love her greatly!!! I completely understand their fear and protectiveness! All good parents would share the same emotions! No one has the right to judge either sets of parents because clearly both sides love her dearly and only have done their best to protect her! May God continue to bless both families as they continue to bond and create beautiful lasting memories together! This is truly a beautiful example of no matter what culture we are from we ALL share the COMMON BOND OF LOVE FOR OUR FAMILIES❤️🙏❤️
As an adopted child, I understand that they were afraid that they would lose her love. However if they trusted the upbringing they provided, they would see that they would never lose her love. My adopted mom is my mom. My birth mom is a friend.
I'm not adopted, but this was a comment I made after watching this. The adoptive parents needed to trust that they were raising her to be a responsible, wise, and thoughtful young lady. Someone they trusted to have good judgement. i also think that because they knew the biological parents were waiting all this time, and that adopted children most always want to meet the biological parents, and because it's the right thing to do, Kati should have been raised in a mix of cultures and traditions that included her Chinese Culture. And Mandarin lessons.
I mean they were forced to give her away or else she’d be killed or yeah :( because of the one child policy. It’s nice enough that they decided to keep her and not abort her
@@_xiaotin8490 well it’s true, having a child more than one is illegal act for China, they usually want the child is male focus in the army, while female focus on becoming a housewife, etc. I knew that because I have a China aunt who came from China and now she resisted as a local resident. Ps. I’m an Asian
"You look so much like your mum... But you dont understand what Im saying" My heart breaks for the pain that mother feels. I gave birth to my first child december of last year, and I couldnt imagine a life without him. I hope she went on to learn their language so they can communicate without an interpreter Edit: it makes me so happy she's learning Mandarin 😭❤
Yeah……I actually had to pause the video for a moment when she said that! I’m just like 😣 Ugh…and like idk why but holy shit that tiny little statement just hit me soo hard! As a mother myself It is hard for me to even begin to imagine the pain that that mother(and father) had to be feeling every moment, of every day, for 20 years!? FFS that’s rough 🥺
Me too. I hope she can stay close to them especially her sister. They bonded beautifully and interesting that Katie thought she had been left somewhere. Adoptees have memories because it's trauma.
I have two children who speaks only English... If I could turn back I would send them to language classes as todliers... Maybe Chinese Mondays and Spanish Tuesdays.... Languages is so important.... I can speak four
@@evamagone8613 it’s certainly easier to do as a toddler, but you can learn at any age. If they move to another country when they’re older (assuming by children you mean child age - how fun is English that you have to classify ‘grown/adult children’. My uncle didn’t begin to learn a second language until he was 20. He learnt Spanish with no pre-existing entry structure of the language or similar beforehand, (60’s-70’s New Zealand education rarely included second language) . He’s a polyglot now, just through immersion with his advertising job, immersion is the best method after early introduction (speaking as a person who was involved in a long term toddler to adulthood piano teaching study/programme). He speaks English, Spanish, Mandarin, Nihongo, French and Cantonese. As well as a handful of semi fluent languages, I was introduced to second language at 12 and speak and write English, Spanish, Japanese and Welsh. I’ve got some Māori, Italian and French, latter two just having an easy connection to the Latin languages, and can do verrrrry basic German. But I’d say a lot was self taught without immersion and my parents aren’t even bilingual. I don’t think I’ve got my uncles gift, although I have studied English linguistics, I just kept up the practice. It’s never too late, you can begin to encourage them with your own immersion programme I’d they’re at home. They’ll speak their usual language at school and with friends, but you can create an immersion environment at home gradually. Start with colours, label objects like the fridge, begin to refer to them by the label name etc.
To have 1 parent that loves you more than anything is a beautiful thing!, but to have 4 parents who love you unconditionally is a beautiful blessing that no one should take for granted!! ❤
I think both families were fantastic.. but a big pat on the back to Katie who had the confidence, strength and kindness to show both families that she has room to love them all.
If you want ear the voice of a mother, ear this film. No one actresses in the world could nt do that. The soul of this mother was just in front of us ! Pure love ! God bless them.
i have family on my dads side that i see like every 6 ish years, like i just hardly ever get to see them because they live in a different country and when i finally get to see them again, they do the exact same thing, even the crying with the tightest hugs when we first meet, my grandma hugs me so tight that it feels like i'll bruise. it kinda makes me wanna cry because it's like that big reassurance and reminder of how much they really do love you after so long of not seeing them
The poor biological mother. I watched her sit by the bio father as he talked about having to give her up and she didn't say a word but the second she saw her daughter for the first time she couldn't stop talking and crying. It's just heartbreaking and the daughter looked so out of place like she didn't know what to do. She was actually kind of stoic.
I can understand Katie feeling stoic seeing total strangers, even though their her biological parents, pour out so much emotion over her. I am sure she understood but emotionally how can she feel much for people she just met for the first time? I really felt bad for the biological mother the pain, guilt sorrow, etc over giving up her daughter the last 20 years and then seeing her the first time is overwhelming is an understatement.
@@bobmorane2082 she was followed by a filming crew with no privacy. And then there’s language and cultural barriers on top of that. No wonder she felt that way.
It's 20 years of guilt and sorrow of the birth mother. For Katie, I think she is very contended with her adoptive family, so meeting her biological parents is just to have some closure to her birth.
Today 60 years ago my mother left me in a garden in Hong Kong. I think about her a lot and I hope that even though distance and time separate us, she still think about me. I’ve got nearly no chance if ever meeting her, she might be dead for all I know, but this documentary does it for all of us who will never meet their parents. If my own parents cared as much as these parents did for Katie, then I am consoled.
Some parents just feel guilty and think they are not in a position to try to reclaim the love from their abandoned children. I knew a mother with such a mentality. When she moved to a new address, she didn't leave a message to her abandoned daughter who came to visit her sometimes. As a kid then, I could not understand her behavior, so my dad gave me that explanation. 谁都没有完美的人生，一切还是顺其自然好了。
My mother abandoned me when I was 4 years old and I was not as fortunate as some of you. it was a horrible life I’ve been through.. I was abandon because I was a girl! But I still miss my mom...I pray everyday to God for hope to see her before I die😥🙏🏻
I am so glad that you went home and met your biological family for the first time. I understood every word that your parents spoke and it warms my heart to see that you all met again. The meal that she made you in her home was so elaborate and labor-intensive. It's the way Chinese moms show their deep love for you. I also loved the fact that your parents saved your Chinese New Year money for you knowing/hoping that they would be able to give it to you in person one day. I am thrilled to see that you are learning Chinese. It's the best way to connect to your roots. Congrats on a job well done.
the most painful thing is how much her biological parents seem like really great parents. they seem to be very gentle and caring and patient. and although they have always been hurting these many years, they never neglected her sister. of course we don't know the whole story/their lives but their humility and sincerity are really obvious in this documentary.
to me, the most striking thing is how much affection her sister seems to have for her. that would likely not be the case if the parents have been neglecting her while pining for kati.
maybe its has something to do with why they had to abandon her, or bc they were poor.. and the adoptive family first have to go through some paper work to establish a income that can support the adoptive kid... dont really know.. or maybe its bc its the most f###ing racist thing i read today... but im not really sure...
Lol that was the most condescending, American exceptionalist comment.. How do you know her Chinese biological family doesn't have "graceful manners" and a "beautiful speech pattern"? Do you know Mandarin? Obviously she had it better in the U.S. given her biological family's situation, but there is ALWAYS shame and worry attached to giving up a child even if someone is poor! Poor people in the United States don't have it good either. Her parents didn't know what happened to her for years and felt a ton of guilt about giving her up, and who's to say she wouldn't have ended up somewhere terrible? The parents had no idea where she was, even if she was still alive.
@Asa Olsen lol trust me, I'm fine and don't have "emotional problems". It's ironic how you want to use the possiblity of someone having emotional issues as an insult when mental health issues have such a horrible stigma, and then you call ME the bully. How is calling out someone's condescending tone or trying to argue with their points "bullying"? In the video you can see that her Chinese DOES feel pain and shame for giving her up. Even though she was given a better life, that doesn't mean that her family doesn't feel pain and loss even though they were poor. Yes, the standard of living is lower in China than in the West, but they probably questioned every day whether they did the right thing and probably still question it. I just think it's wrong to chalk up whether someone has "pain" for giving up a child to whether the child now has wealth or not. It's dehumanizing to the Chinese family.
@Mike Chan they can't keep sons or daughters, at that time, you could only have 1 child in a family. They *had* to leave their daughter, otherwise they would be fined a lot of yen. The husband does seem really sorry about it, he's crying. Nobody was smirking throughout it all.
That was so sweet and I totallyyyy understand the moms reaction but I wouldn't advise bio parents to do that to a child upon first meeting. That's their personal space and they don't know you at all. You can see the uncomfortable and awkward face Kati has. But as a mother, I can totally understand the feeling of just collapsing when reuniting with your baby
@@SavageThrifter I understand where you are coming from as well but I have to say I disagree. They may not know her but she was created in the womb of that woman. Kati's blood and life comes from them. Kati may be uncomfortable but her mom needed to do this to be healed. She looked like to held on to so much pain and unforgiveness towards herself.
@@SavageThrifter I think Katie understood. I think her uncomfortabilty came from not being able to comprehend what her mother was saying. But you can see her comfort her biological mother as she cries on the bench.
As an adoptee who was forbidden to know my birth parents, I can say the ache never goes away. Science now points to a “primal” wound which occurs when a newborn is separated from the mother, the only contact they have ever known & bonded to in utero. My adoptive mother informed me that if I were to find my birth mother, I was not allowed to call her mother as she hadn’t earned it. That edict somehow broke my affection for my adoptive family. I finally learned the identity of my birth parents in my mid-fifties. Sadly my mother had died of lupus in her 20’s. But my father was still alive and keen to have contact. That connection was so healing. I understand the utility of adoption & the struggles of adoptive parents. But it must be understood that damage is done in separating a child, no matter the reason. And the need to connect to one’s origins is psychologically essential. It seems adoptive parents often create a narrative for themselves that negates/ignores the birth parent agony. Assuming a child doesn’t need their history & some kind of connection to birth parents is selfish and delusional.
The Chinese mom broke my heart. Look at how she was hugging Kati. I am in tears for her biological parents... She is so lucky to have another loving set of parents.. double the love
Is a blessing to have two sets of parents, you definitely get double the love. I'm fortunate to have been brought up by two families too, but it definitely hurts double when you have to say goodbye to both my fathers who coincidentally both passed away due to cancer. Still blessed to have both my mums around and they are the world to me.
Her parents did an incredible job of raising her, and her biological parents did an equally amazing job of finding her. No one should blame anyone! She’s very young and still has her whole life ahead of her and she can do what she wants.
@@KitKat4Christ Oh, yes...I do. I was adopted at birth and had a wonderful family and life! I am an American and didn't have cultural differences. I could relate to her curiosity, but my Mom also worried about me meeting my birth mother...it's natural. I received a packet of letters from her that Mom had saved for me when I turned 18. I read them and cried, because I could see her handwriting was exactly like mine and she was only 18...my same age then. My story had some twists in that in the early 80s, I went to work for a VP of a large oil co., and in about 3 yrs. over lunch with a female accountant, we discovered that we were cousins! I was shocked and met her parents who I very much liked. I eventually met another set of older cousins, but I let them know I had no intentions of contacting her as long as my Mom lived, because it would stress too many of the family. I got lots of pictures of her, and her 3 girls and Doctor husband. I was amazed at how much I favored her! I did meet my maternal grandmother, and it was emotional for me, but she didn't know who I was! In a few years, I changed jobs and lost contact with the cousins. In the end, I was happy, learning a lot about my bloodline, and not having ventured into the unknown of this family. I learned years later that her daughters were told about me, and eventually they told my birth mother. So, maybe my birth Mother saw my pictures...I don't know. She passed away just before her 91st birthday, and her mother lived to 99.5 yrs! No regrets, because the woman who raises you in a loving Christian home from birth IS the true Mother!....
Truely a touching story, I just wish the adoptive parents made more effort in educating their daughter on her heritage, culture and language, especially knowing her biological parents were longing to meet her. I hope the families continue to connect with eachother and get to know one another.
I watched it for the first time a few years ago in my school’s study area, and I was trying so hard not to cry so much. I was adopted from China in 2000 and every time I watch this I cry. Even though I have absolutely no recollection of China, it makes me so sad to know I’ll probably never know my biological family
There are two parts to this story that I love: -They saved equal amount for their daughter (not about the money); -Father texts her good morning and good night everyday. This breaks hearts.
Northernspear her birth father is so sweet and genuine in the thoughtful things he does for his daughter. I get the feeling that her Birth mom was so overwhelmed and traumatized by having to abandon her baby, that she did not know how to process the feelings. Finally, when reunited with her daughter after 20 years, all of those feelings came out. I love that her birth parents both call her Baby❤️
I was also adopted from China, at only a year old by an American family in 2001. Ever since I was a little girl, I wondered who my real parents were and if they ever still think about me. As much as I love my adoptive parents and sister, I still would love to meet my original family one day and get to know more about them.
I love how when they met on the bridge, the father gave the daughter a respectable amount of space because he knew it would be too overwhelming for her if he death-hugged her. Not to say that what the mother did was bad--I would probably do the same thing if I was her--but you can tell the daughter was kind of at a loss on what to do. The father was able to keep his emotions and impulses in check and save it for later, probably because he took into consideration the possibility that the daughter may not even want to be affectionate with them. I respect him.
I think it had to do with the cultural aspect of being respectful to women and giving them their personal space. East asian countries have more social boundaries about how men and women should act around eachother and pda in general. And of course there is the extra awkwardness of meeting for the first time. But yeah i'm sure you are also right about him feeling guilty/undeserving and wanting to respect her feelings as well.
While I can kind of imagine how emotional it must have been for the birth mother, I think I would have had a very similar reaction to Kati’s - she seemed overwhelmed and kind of stunned. It might sound heartless and of course I come from a very different culture, and China’s policy was horrendous, but it feels like the bio mom made it all about herself and her feelings. The first thing I would have liked to hear from her would’ve been something like “did you have a good life?”. I might be projecting here though...! 20 years ago I reunited with my father after 20 years of separation. He hardly asked me any questions about myself and mostly focused on telling me how my mom took me away from him (she didn’t : a family court judge did, and for good reasons). I can sympathize with what he went through, but I was like “um, I’m the child here... you wanna maybe try and make an effort to be a parent, even for a minute?” I respect the bio father and sister for giving Kati her space, though.
@@jean-francoisdaignault9612 the parents were living with guilt their entire life's. It was an sudden overwhelm for them to see their daughter after years after abandoning her. Their hearts were really heavy and the moment they saw her they wept for forgiveness... I mean it's kinda what they would have done becoz of their guilt.. And obviously later on they might have asked how r u? R u well? ... I mean it's just how I felt.. Although i am certain they make sure she was doing well..
millennial twins yes of course, and I can hardly imagine how they felt, and it must have been overwhelming like you say. I guess I can relate to Kati more easily, coming from a similar culture and having been on the receiving end of an estranged parent’s overwhelming expression of their feelings.
One small detail reveals Katie's biological parents' feeling are genuine, not out of guilty or because in front of a camera. The money in the "red envelope" they saved for Katie every year are very old Chinese bills that were circulated in the 90s. These bills are out of the market and rare nowadays. Katie must have been in their mind every year for a long time.
Yeah and its sad that the adoptive parents waited sooo long to tell Katie. Or I dont think they were planning on tellin katie unless Katie asked. But what if Katie never asked Bout her biological parents? Then her precious parents frm China would never see her. Jus imagine? Thats sad..
As an Adoptive Mother of a Korean young woman now this broke my heart. All I wanted was to share the amazing gift with the people who made her possible. I see adoptive parents who not want to think that child ever belonged to anyone but them but it did. You lose nothing by sharing and they can give that child parts of themselves they need. How lucky and complete will that child be to know and love four parents. It takes nothing away from the birth parents or the one’s that raised them. It gives balance and a full identity. I have wished this for my daughter always. No one ever came but each Country is different and I know the shame Korean women were made to feel and still are. I don’t believe for a minute she didn’t want contact.
I’m happy that she has decided to improve her mandarin. It would break down the barrier that still separated from her parents when she spent time with them
My husband was left at an orphanage in the Philippines as a baby. He was left in a basket at the doorway with a note wrapped in the blanket with him. The note said that his mother was scared, and that she had tried to keep him but had no choice but to leave him for his own safety, and that she would always think of him and love him. She said what his given name was, but no last name. She asked that they take care of him. He was adopted 2 years later by American parents and has had a great life here. The note is still in his adoption documents and it makes me cry everytime I see it. So this story hurts my heart but is so beautiful and miraculous at the same time.
It would be hard to track your husband's biological parents(or his mother) because they didnt leave any clue and just his name without the surname.its like finding treasure in a haystack. regardless, wishing all the best to your family.
24:05 Seeing the older sister crying got me, damn it. As heart wrenching as it was to see the parents and as much as I empathize as a biological parent myself, there’s also a lot of pain there for both her and her bio parents on that front, and a lot of pressure being put on her from her birth parents because of their own guilt and longing. But with her sister, none of that is weighing on them and neither of them have other siblings that will complicate the feelings via comparison, so they can have the chance to actually develop a normal sister relationship. For that reason, seeing her sister crying for me. Having gained a sister, and then lost a sister, and then gained a sister again, only to somewhat lose her again to the distance and language barrier (without a translator once she leaves), it just hit me deep in my gut. Maybe it’s because I always wanted a sister but I really hope they all stay in touch and Kati and her sister are able to form a real sister relationship and bond.
Gabby E a real mother?! What? Her “real” mother left her on the street! Wtf! Even if I would have to die for my kids I would never leave them on the street
Joana Messerli you privileged white girl. you don’t understand what it’s like until you experience it. it was a different world then in china especially, don’t speak about something you have no awareness on
Kati is a good woman. She appreciates and can feel how much her parents love her and the feeling was instantly mutual. I like the way she handled it and how comfortable she made her parents feel.
I agree with the daughter completely. They should have consulted her. It's an international adoption, so there was no risk of truly losing her (legally). Their logic was non-logic. They just avoided it. Parents often avoid the difficult thing.
Because of their OWN fears, she could have missed the chance to ever speak to her bio parents. I have seen this too often, where people don't tell the adopted children, and then a bio parent passes away...had a friend who wasn't told until she was in her 30's, and never got the chance to hug her bio parents....
Actually in china the govt always takes the chinese side. Many cases of half chinese half british/canada/usa/etc born in those countries and kidnapped back to china by chinese parent and china refused to return them
@@Adelicows i think you should only adopt if you can't have your own. Why would you use your resources to raise another persons genetic offspring and limit your own. Blood is thicker than water, this chinese girl will grow closer to her bio parents and more and more distant to her adoptive parents . I would of destroyed the letter, im investing in this child I want a return on my investment.Whether that investment is money,love or time/company.Now this chinese young lady will have to support two sets of parents but her bio parents will be top of the list, as china doesn't support the elderly. She'll also spend time there which could of been spent with her adoptive parents. So in the end the adoptive parents invested probably 100k plus for what? I have 5 of my own and will never adopt, but if i were infertile i'd adopt and would make sure zero contact with bio parents.Also adopting a different race of child from your own is hugely problematic , this girl don't love or care for her parents and they grow to hate you because they don't look like you. This video is a great example at 1.40 m.ua-cam.com/video/pvvsjs24UkE/v-deo.html
I was also a victim of the one child policy, my mom almost gave up on me, luckily they didn’t. But my birth costed them a fortune, we were not a wealthy family, after paying the fine, there were nothing left in the house, throughout my childhood, I had never had a new toy or new clothes, and my parents had to work so hard that they seldom spent time with me. I used to complain but now I understand how hard they have been trying to keep me with them.
see? Fiona didn't get left for dead. make damn sure you want to and are ready to have a child before you do. that's the lesson of the story here. kati's parents in the video almost didn't learn that lesson.
JurzGarz prejudice is a preconceived opinion that is not based on reason or actual experience. I can assure you my statements do not meet that definition as they are absolutely based on actual experience. Sad you’re not intelligent enough to understand the distinction.
I cried so hard at “mum is so sorry” a part of me wishes I could have this moment too with my biological Chinese parents. Where ever they are I wish them healthy, happiness and peace. My name was Qiong Zhang. And my orphanage was in WuHan. I doubt they will see this but if they do, to my biological parents: I understand and I don’t blame you. I have a loving adoptive family too. Thank you for your sacrifice.
I can't even imagine what you've already gone through but from your comment..you seem like a really great person.I wish I could help somehow..but I don't have capability..But I'll definitely pray for all your happiness..Be happy..keep smiling..And always remember your an awesomely beautiful person
She's experiencing culture shock. American Suburbia is very different than a proper Chinese street market. I hope she learns Chinese and gets to experience all the interesting things there.
See one thing is how would the adopted parents cover up the fact that she was Chinese... like I’m not saying adopted parents should not tell but how could they have covered it up either ? But both parent sets are really nice 😊👏
@@varshakaul9587 The adoptive parents didn't cover up the fact that she was Chinese. They were open from the start, telling her she came from a woman's tummy in China. What they didn't do was reveal to her all the details about her adoption.
Bawling my eyes out!!! As soon as her mum hugged her lord have mercy all that love over flowing is just priceless!!! I hope everything has been amazing for all of them ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️🇬🇧 Need an update
I would have forgiven the parents because that one child policy was brutal. Especially since Katie was a female. If they would have kept her she most likely would not be alive nor her family. Sad really.
+Spike Spiegel-I think it is pretty clear that they very much always wanted to be a parent for a next child. They never wanted to give her up if they had the choice, and the dad even said when she started crying where he surrendered her, it took his brother to hold him back from going back to her and taking her back with him. They were destroyed giving up Katie, surrendering her is arguably the most heartbreaking trauma they ever had to go through, and they probably still don't forgive themselves for having to surrender her in the first place. I don't think there's anything really to forgive. They were caught in a bad situation they couldn't escape. If they had kept Katie, the "kindest" punishment they would've been given would have been such a high fine that their families probably could not afford and would've bankrupted them entirely. If they would have been able to hide Katie away, she never would've been allowed to go to school, no anyone outside the family, have a normal life, and be locked away for her entire childhood. And if she was found out that she was a second girl in the family, there was a very good possibility she would've been killed. Taken away in the middle of the night where they never see her again. I think they realized as the second child during that horrendous, wrenching era, Katie would never have been afforded a quality life. She never would've been happy, and she may have been taken away and murdered by the system just for being alive. They gave her up not just to protect their family, but to save her. By giving her up, she had a chance at a good life that they couldn't give her. And the fact they couldn't give her that, it destroyed her mother. She kept on sobbing that she failed Katie as a mother. She felt that if she was a "good mother", she never would've agreed to give her daughter away. But there was very little else she could've done in that situation. Especially if no one close to her was willing to adopt Katie so Katie would at least grow up knowing who her biological family was. She had to make the most difficult decision of her life, and she never wanted to. These are truly very wonderful, extraordinary people. And it hurts that they will probably never forgive themselves for what they were forced to do. I think they should, Katie has forgiven them and has no ill will for what they were forced to do, and I think they should be less hard on themselves. Understand it was a decision made they never wanted to, but a decision they had to to save their family and give Katie a chance at a good life. The "one child policy" era is littered with so many tragedy that is still sending out ripples today but what they were forced to do was not their fault. So forgive yourself and don't let that regret weigh you down. All you can do is just spend the rest of your life getting to know her.
She said her father wants her forgiveness but she feels no need because there is nothing to forgive. I don't see any resentment for her birth parents as she understands the position they were in.
I came from China, grew up that time, it's all lie from biological parents. They would not be killed if they kept her, they gave birth in hoping the second child is a boy, otherwise they would've done abortion in earlier stage of pregnancy, that's how my sister accidentally pregnant but aborted because of one child policy. But in so many places couples were still hoping getting pregnant again if their first child is a girl. That's why they gave birth, in China you can't know unborn child's sex, because people didn't want girls that time, government wanted to prevent abortion of girls. If it was a son they would keep, but they wouldn't have government support for their second child. That's all. It is quite cruel for her biological parents to use all means to get her heart, considering she has parents and family where she grew up with. The biological parents are not good people, the story they were telling definitely not true. But the adoptive parents are being white people, which currently is the target of world wide condemnation and bullying, so no one truly feel what they are feeling. I guess the emotion always clouded our eyes, prevented our fair judgement.
@@Gigi-ki8xiplus they didn't even have lots of money, so they couldn't raise her even if there was no one-child policy, they could either let the child suffer with them or possibly find them a better home where they could be fed, the father even waited for someone to pick up the child and could only hope that the person had a better situation than them. plus they were definitely thinking about her because the money in the red envelope is old currency. Raising a child is a big deal, my parents have probably spent over a million dollars on me and as the last child, they also gave/give me more attention than my siblings because they were still young when they gave birth to my sister and my brother and didn't have a lot of money and worked a lot, they were only able to raise them because of my grandma who helped take care of them. they are in a much better place now they own a firm and are great lawyers. almost every parent has a reason to give up their child.
Oh boy, maybe it’s a female thing (not to stereotype). I would have freaked out if my biological parents would have sobbed like that during the first meeting.
@purple peter It's anecdotal. Used to belong to a yahoo group (lol, yes. long time ago) with Korean adoptees. Mostly talked to female adoptees and there seemed to be more emotion involved. Also, went on a binge youtube watching thing with adoption meetings. Dudes never cry when when meeting their birth families, me included. I think I might have teared up a bit when I left. edit: I remember now. I looked back at the airport and saw my sister (biological). And she was crying. I was closest to her in the whole trip there. Boy, yeah. That stuck with me.
I FELT THE SAME, its hard to exlain, i was watching though out the video but when THAT moment came in suddenly i started to cry so hard, it was like a human instinct i had never experienced it, anyway hope youre doing welll
Olivia Gerdemann My sister and I are both adopted, I’m from Guatemala while my older sister was adopted from China. When my parents adopted her, someone who worked at the orphanage or helped to arrange the adoption told my parents that they should remain in touch with another set of parents of another baby girl. The babies looked strikingly similar but my sister had longer hair. They remained in touch and suspected the girls might be related in one way or another. After about 10 years they got the girls blood tested and found out not only were they twins but IDENTICAL twins. They kept in touch all throughout their lives with plenty of visits and vacations together. I have memories of my sister’s twin coming over to stay for a week or so and memories of them speaking on the phone so often. They were truly inseparable. We still have no information on their parents; however, I believe her twin has become interested in her heritage and is nearly fluent in Mandarin and visited China several times. As for me, I have some information on my foster family and managed to reconnect with my foster sister (who was my main caregiver) over Facebook at 13 or 14 and I had a friend who was fluent in Spanish help translate for me and I just sobbed hearing her tell me she wondered what became of me and how I looked and what I was doing nearly every day. I don’t know very much at all about my biological mother but I look like a carbon copy of her. I turn 18 soon and I’ve thought about maybe trying to find her but after watching this, I think I have to.
@@gabbykabins4333 I'm not saying this to discourage you by any means instead I'm doing it as a warning. If you want to find about your biological parents it's alright, but you should be very cautious about it. In this video all went well and the biological parents were very loving and caring, but you never know. Panama isn't China, there is no "one child policy", so there must be another reason and who knows. What I know is that Latino people are very close and caring about family (I'm Spanish), if someone in the family is in need, the rest of the members come to help. Also that in Panama or Latin America in general life costs aren't expensive at all. So starting from those statements, I can't come up with a good reason why would any mother give her child in adoption. So just be careful, and more if you don't speak Spanish.
She is very collected, understanding, mature.. Her biological parents are very nice, sympathetic.. Her adopting family did a great job raising her.. All I see is beautiful souls in this video..
every animal or insects dont have money they still have baby and raise them the parents who leave their child like that is are shittiest dont show sympathy to them that type of people care more about them selves then anyone if she loved her so much she would die to be with her not leave her
I cried my heart out watching this! We adopted our loving chinese daughter when she was an infant and i always wonder how the biological parents feel and i so wish they could know what a wonderful little lady she became and how much we love her!!
I saw a documentary once about a chinese girl, who was the second child of a family and essentially lived in hiding. She did not go to school, had no friends, was basically like in a prison. A terrible life. So I think, Kaiti's biological parents took the right decision. I am very sorry for them that they lived through such a difficult situation. I really hope they all come to terms with that history and can create something of a relationship.
@@PraiseTheFSMonster they chose to because the baby could've died. For the baby it was either death or the opportunity of being saved. They chose to give her a chance, even if they weren't sure that she'd be saved.
@@Aeyaoo_11 If the government found out that they had a baby, they would have put it in an orphanage. You know when she could have died? When she was left on the street.
@@PraiseTheFSMonster no, there were consequences for having a 2nd child, including forced sterilizations, large fines imposed, and even in some circumstances, women were tied up for induced abortions. So yeah, the family was poor and they couldn't afford paying. They didn't want the government to kill the child, and to leave her in a child care place they would have to pay too.
@@Aeyaoo_11 People had second children ALL THE TIME. It was a huge problem. The government put those children in orphanages, which weren't great but the kids stayed alive and they got food, water, clothing and shelter. These people left their baby on the street, where it could have starved, been killed, been kidnapped, or been put into human trafficking. If they wanted to leave it somewhere, they could have dropped it off at an orphanage, at a church, or at a police station. But they chose to leave it under a table at an outdoor market where anything could have happened. Those parents are monsters.
As a Chinese citizen living in Texas, I know quite a few Chinese kids, who were adopted in China by American families. They are as amazing as you can expect. Upbringing with love, care and compassion has, in a real sense, transformed the spirit and mind of the kids in a positive and loving manner. Kudos to those adoptive parents!
Paul Gu...ALL children deserve to know who their "biological" parents are, especially when adoptive parents have the info. I KNEW this would fall back on all those adoptive parents running to China over 20 years ago in order to avoid the intervention by local, biological parents. I feel it terrible these adoptive parents withheld biological parents info from Katie for 22 yrs out of "FEAR" that their daughter would leave them & love their biological parents! I have NEVER met an adopted adult who did not want to KNOW their "biological" parents. Whether good or bad, every child is entitled to know.
Recently I've watched videos shot by Chinese TV stations about the rest of this touching story and grown to love both sweet parents even more. In 2014 I went to an appointed hospital for a body checkup in Guangzhou, China, where candidates planning to leave for US for the 1st time were required to receive a bunch of physical checkups before going . I found out there was a separate area in the hospital where the American adoptive parents were there with their lately adopted kids for the similar body exam. My gosh! I almost burst into tears while watching those kind foreign parents holding their Chinese babies with love, care and smiles. I really admired and appreciated the selfless and generous spirit of those adoptive parents. In addition, much to my astonishment, most of those little ones I saw there at the hospital had various congenital physical defects, which, to numerous Chinese families, is not accepted because of the anxieties or fears about burden, shame and trouble, etc.. And In China, esp. in the remote countries, the notion of preferring to have boys to girls is quite ingrained too. If the second or third born is still a girl, her parents or grandparents won't feel unbiased and satisfied. The girls are either not treated well enough or given away to other people to raise. What's more, some families would even sell the girls to other families or even human-traffickers. Further, if the baby, either a girl or a boy, is born disabled or has some congenital health issues, some families will abandon them under stress. Lots of the Chinese parents, many of whom tend to compare themselves with others, think children, as their own asset belonging to them, should glorify the name of their family by being successful, healthy, good-looking, wealthy, famous or showing enough filial duty. Granted, blood is thicker than water. However, in my own experience I have known several of adult friends who know their biological parents but are unwilling to meet with them; I also know or have heard about even a few of those who've never wanted to know about their biological parents after they knew from sources that they had been traded or discarded like goods or unused objects by their birth parents. Concerning the story about Katy, I remember reading a Highly Liked comment from an adopted adult on a very famous website in China. She wrote when she realized she had been traded with around 3000 Yuan by her biological parents, she was heart-broken and would never want to meet her biological parents; the day she was traded signified the day of the start of a new relationship with another family. After pondering my experience and Chinese culture combined with the psychologically dark sides of human nature I kind of know why in China most of comments about Katy's story are awfully mean, negative and even revengeful towards her biological parents even though according to the story, Katy's Chinese parents had to leave her owing to the threat of forced abortion. The reason Chinese people are so angry with her birth parents may be that a large number of Chinese people regard what the Chinese parents have done as an epitome and revelation of a series of ugly aspects of life in China. While I disagree about the angry and complaining voices in China since the biological parents of Katy were also the victims to then Chinese politics, it still bothers me that due to their own reasons many other Chinese parents at last have chosen to abandon their kids who might become a Chinese Nick Vujicic, Oscar Pistorius or Faith Hill in the future. Meanwhile, unfortunately, through the Internet, the tones of revenge, hatred, selfishness arising out of cruel abandonment spread very fast and they even hang over the younger generation who may not be involved in any of the similar experiences; this may reverberate for a long time. The adoptive parents in Katy's story are the light to the world, and I wish we had more of those people in my country. Please join me in the prayers that whether they are adopted or not the kids will be brought up with love, care, compassion and grace instead of being influenced by anger, hatred and revenge and ungratefulness.
I'm adopted and do not want to know. It is different for everyone but I do agree that the choice to know or not should be given to each child (or once they become older and more interested) if the information is available.
This story was so wholesome. I definitely teared up when I saw her birth mother cry. It must’ve been such a heart wrenching choice having to give their younger daughter up. But thank God they were able to reunite. May God bless both her birth parents and adoptive parents. They both obviously love her very much.
Maybe too much guilt shown as for the first meeting. I think the father's attitude is more appropriate. This is not that I don't understand the mother but I think they should have had support from a psychologist before they meet her
I am 28 years old. I have never had a child but I cannot imagine the depth of searing pain in her soul. It absolutely broke me in two and I sobbed and sobbed.
I wish you upcoming fulfillment in whatever you dream....No matter how "good" a family she was adopted into, it must be a lifelong inner journey to wonder who and what was left behind. We all want inner peace.
Her mother was very vocal and emotional-but her fathers heartbreak is palpable. She has been blessed with two families who love her. God bless them all ❤️
her bio parents are the kindest souls, honestly I know this was a very complicated situation, but I fell mixed feelings on how her adoptive parents handled the situation. My parents never hid anything from me, like I felt second hand betrayal from them being so hush hush and hiding it for soooooo many years.
For those wondering what the note says:
“Our daughter, Jingzhi, was born at 10am on the 24th day of the seventh month of the lunar calendar, 1995. We have been forced by poverty and affairs of the world to abandon her. Oh, pity the hearts of fathers and mothers far and near! Thank you for saving our little daughter and taking her into your care. If the heavens have feelings, if we are brought together by fate, then let us meet again on the Broken Bridge in Hangzhou on the morning of the Qixi Festival in 10 or 20 years from now.”
thank you for translation
😭
that's a beautiful note, if the heavens have feelings, then let us meet again on the broken bridge
This story is so beautiful yet so heartbreaking. 😭
😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
'You look so much like your mum .. but you don't understand what I'm saying', said her mum. That hit hard
Holo A I know right..? I’m honestly glad the story ended this way, that’s probably the best ending we can ever ask for.
So many choices can be made differently and things would not turn out as good as this, ever.
Her dad is cute af lol
She was LOVED. What a LUCKY GIRL. God bless her.
@@curiousgeorge6921 Her parents are beautiful. Bc Katie is very gorgeous. She does look like the mom. But have some of the dad in her too.
Rare Breed Gee you don’t say, who would have thought she would look like her birth parents
I lost it and cried when her parents gave her the red packet full of 20 years of money. Red packets is a custom, older married relatives will always give the younger generation red packets. This means every chinese new year, they put aside money and saved red packets for her. Every year they were thinking of her, probably prepared two red packets - one for her sister and one for her - and saved it for their younger daughter, hoping to give it to her one day. The level of thoughtfulness and love for their daughter completely blows my mind.
wang xian yeah I was like that can’t be true till I saw the old version of the RMB note in that pocket.
It hit me hard too, as a chinese this is the ultimate point where I truly believe that her parents suffered so much, they really want to raise her, but somehow this is the best decision. I can't imagine in that position ever.
wang xian sometimes this tradition happens in India it happened to me
Now I'm crying 😭😭
@@bananakids_1212 really? that is so fascinating! do you get it in red packets too or is it a different color? so interesting
It's so strange to think that thousands of girls have similar stories. I'm also adopted from China and raised in the US. My parents told me from the beginning, "your biological parents loved you so much and sacrificed their lives to give you up and give you a chance for a better life". Although I was never interested in finding my biological parents, I believe they really did love me and had no option bc of the 1 child policy.
Do u have any information about your biological parents? Or there was never any communication
Yeah that broken system!🤨
@@minialex1354 umm her older sister is a girl so obviously the family did not care about whether their children were a boy or a girl, but rather this was forced upon them due to the one child policy
We Chinese people are CCP‘s slaves！We have nothing rights！We‘re terriblely hard to make our life better！The world don't know real China because CCP shows a fake China to the world！I ran away to US！But I'm still sad about our people！
CCP is Evil！
@@minialex1354 I was an unwanted daughter born to one child China. I can tell you with 100% certainty that the birth parents in this documentary absolutely wanted her, because they did the exact opposite to what my parents did to me. I wish my parents showed half their amount of love and compassion as these folks.
fact that her dad lived across the globe and thought of her every day and felt so much love and guilt, while some dads live in same city as their kids and dont give a shit, is just heartbreaking
true
or in the same household
Fact
:((((
Well some kids are just horrible.
"her birth dad texts her "good morning" and "good night" every day" - i cry so hard
Adoptive parents: pfffft lets not tell her about her biological parents who are suffering in China and missing her pfft why would we do that??
DIONOND GIRL - It was very selfish on their part, but they were afraid that the daughter they had raised since a baby would be taken away by the government (either US or China) and given back. It’s happened before. After the fear subsided, it was clear that they just didn’t want to share her. So many chances lost for Katy to learn more about her culture (like why wasn’t she sent to Chinese language school throughout her childhood like other adoptees, so she kept line to her past), so many chances lost for her adoptive parents to prepare Katy to love both sets of parents. In the end I hope Katy fully forgives her adoptive parents. That will make this a truly happy ending.
@@darlenevm how are they to know what dialect to teach... chinese is not a singular language ..its more complex than people think
@@dionondgirl127 big women big
Big women
Big women
one minor translation error here. When they're at the video chat, after Kati's biological mother said "thank you", she didn't just say "for taking care of Kati" but "for raising her to become such a wonderful child."
Jenny Ng yeah the translation bothered me too lol especially not delivering the full message to the biological parents
Jenny Ng I noticed it too and I’m glad I’m not the only one bothered by it.. what Kati’s biological mother said had so much more meaning than what was translated and it’s so upsetting that the meaning got lost in translation :(
oh! I wish the translations were more accurate.
Thank you
I don't blame whoever was translating for that. It's hard to translate accurately on the spot in such an emotional moment with cameras pointing everywhere.
Kudos to the adoptive parents for doing a good job in raising Katie to be an emotionally matured adult.
Yeah,they did raise an intelligent and kind hearted little girl that's growing into a fine young woman for sure and absolutely beautiful. Heck, she didn't even so much as have a bad word even come out of her mouth like at all so you can very much tell she was raised right,yet so many people hate on America and us american families. It just all depends on who you're,who and how you're raised around and where you're raised because it's very different everywhere and what other countries don't know either is that here in America it's also like being in several different countries depending on where you're at and where you go. People on the east Coast are extremely different from those of the west Coast and then you've the mid west and then the south where I was born n raised and all are completely different in every way.
It would have been good if they had the guidance and support of the adoptive parents, to discuss a possible reunion etc.
They failed. Why wouldn’t they encourage her to learn Chinese?!
@@HS-ie8tj just be grateful for the love they gave her. Asking too much
@@weloveyoona693I was adopted twice as a child.
Americans have no idea what they’re doing.
“Least she made it ok” shouldn’t be the default.
At least these people were so good as to “let” her reconnect with her biological family.
Not all of us are so lucky.
Can we talk about how considerate the biological parents were? That, despite the heartache they already had, they were willing to wait TEN to TWENTY YEARS so that the adoptive parents might get comfortable with the idea. And you can see on their faces that they were thinking about her every day of their lives. I don't think any of us can imagine that kind of pain.
This is a heart touching true story hope both sets of parents and kati can finally find peace. God bless them all
Definitely!! The adoptive mother on the other hand seemed to be more worried about what she wants than the child’s feelings 🙄 a bit disturbing how she was trivializing everything
@Kaththee1 the adopted parent are really very kind persons, God has sent angels to Kati !
How can you judge that. Media brought the families together.
@Christoph, 🥺😥💖
Yo they signed it "from your heartless parents" I am in tears
Me too that hit
Me too that hit
Hard
Giselle Miranda 😔
Me too in tears. I can communicate with my family parents or brothers sisters
I have too easy life
Can we talk about what a legend her biological father is.
one chinses good guy
Amen sister. I adored him immediately
I fell in love with him. What a sweet, sweet, sweet man. They are both so loving and caring. ❤❤
They loved her. But they couldn't raise her
The note he left was written poetically, I can feel their pain & helpless back decades ago.
As an adoptee from China myself, this definitely hits home. It's so interesting to see how us adoptees ended up and also to see the similarities. I hope that one day, I will find my biological parents as well.
I hope you will too. I’m sorry for what you’ve had to go through and for how difficult it must be to be searching for your biological family. I wish you well on this difficult journey ❤
Biological parents gave their responsibility to foster parents. Without the foster parents, the child is already dead because the biological parents do not want the child
Wishing you all the best dear.. big hugs from Italy 💖
Hope for you too. Wishing you much luck.
My biological father wants nothing to do with me because he is a jerk. Thankfully, I have a Heavenly Father that loves me instead.
man wtf this sad af, this quarantine got me watching all types of stuff
Bullet proof
Malik Sharkattack Riiiighttt!!! Lol!!! I am balling my eyes out! Lol..It is sad AF...
bruh, same lol
Same here...
Get my emotions running wild, cuz no one sees me behind closed doors.
Hahaha..same with me.
Her mother was so quiet and reserved during the interviews, but when she saw her daughter she broke. She was so strong.
silkyeoja That made me really emotional. She had been longing for her beloved child.
This is such an amazing and beautiful story … "meet on the broken bridge," … it is a privilege to hear the roots of this reunion and to watch the unfolding of the overwhelmingly intense emotions. On the bridge it felt like there were too many cameras and mom's blubbering mess was understandable and a bit comical... daughter was a bit like "what the heck?" :-) THIS one is a happy account, but it gnaws at the global anguish of parent/child love.
That hit me hard
Not to kill the mood but the daughter's face was hilarious... just like :^) ???
The girl is very lucky to be adopted, most of Chinese girls were just being killed or sold
IT BROKE MY HEART WHEN SHE COULDN’T UNDERSTAND HER MOTHER’S FIRST WORDS TO HER! Oh my God...
she 3 day already being adopted by her adaption family. She grew up following totally another culture. Happy they can reunion.
Just like a baby she couldn't understand her mother's first words!
WOW
Yessss girl I cried like a bby
I teared up when her biological father lit the firecrackers...
Kati was so open and forgiving - she never blamed her biological parents and wanted to meet them with open arms. Wow. And kudos to the adoptive parents for their unwavering love and support, they're amazing too! This is moving and impactful. Glad there was a happy ending.
@Hello there, how are you doing this blessed day?
Meanwhile, if it was me, I would want my child to know it was loved and where it came from.
Because I have met many adopted kids. They wonder where they are from. About their background.
Well, clearly the 2 biological parents were the ones who needed closure.
They were riddled with guilt. Happy ending though.
I feel for everyone here. Adoptive parents were afraid to lose their daughter, biological parents were heartbroken, and Katie is stuck in the middle. At least she knows that she was loved. That is all we hope for.
Her adoptive "parents" where selfish
@@justvibing2171 they should have told her the first time, when she was 10. She actually had loving parents, she wasn't just discarded like trash. Imagine she had a depressive personality and had killed herself during adolescence because she imagined her biological parents just dumped her. "We were afraid she wasn't ready" is a bullshit excuse, hiding the truth could also have played out horribly. They weren't afraid she wasn't ready, they were afraid because _they_ weren't ready. While I can totally understand the fear the adoptive parents must have felt of possibly losing their child after bonding for 10 years I wouldn't be shocked if she had rejected them once she found out they had _actively_ hidden the truth from her. They took a huge bet that she would forgive them when she eventually found out.
@@justvibing2171 they knew she had loveing bio parents out there and the fact the adoptive parent said we were afarid tonlose her. Selfish parents not thinking about how she would feel
@@MelkorPT Telling a teen about that is disruptive to their education and life. It's best to wait till they are an adult and can think rationally.
@@b34k8 being dumped by your parents like a bag of trash is also "disruptive".
I like the Dad. He's an old romantic. "Meet me on the bridge in 20 years".
@Agnes Olsvik yeah, go for it. Tell me how it goes :)
When you find it, please let us meet here in this bridge comments and let us know the news ;)
Father is most likely close his heart for his daughter.
And I like your name. Lol reminds me of Japan
FOH!!
I didn't realize this the first time I watched it, but the biological dad calls her American parents her "parents" not "adoptive parents". It's so subtle, but it just shows how sweet and grateful they really are.
No he did say adoptive parents. I know Chinese the subtitles are incorrect.
It’s just a bad translation
Maybe in parts they did say adoptive, but I also understand chinese and there were definitely parts when they just said parents
Doesn't matter what anyone says. People who raise the kid are ALWAYS the real parents. 😀
@@rjkbuny
You are right, he did just say parents at a couple points.
The biological dad won my heart. How expressive he is of his love and regret. And the fact that like every Asian dad, he too likes to text his children Goodnight and Good morning. I loved this.
When the mom said: "You look just like me, but you can't understand what I'm saying."
I cried hard af
She looked identical to her bio dad.
Ikr
I was just watching a short documentary on the scale of the tragedy of the one child policy. Millions of people who have no siblings, no aunts or uncles, no extended family. The pressure that an only child feels knowing they have to care for their grandparents and parents. There aren’t a lot of girls and women because men were the ones to carry on the family name or work the fields. But that also means there are a lot of single men who will never marry. Millions of girls who were adopted by parents in other countries and the emotional toll it took on their parents to have to give them up. It was heartbreaking and really put into perspective the terrible impact it had on people.
Why What's the Big deal?
Same
My god she is so beautiful. She has her mothers face and fathers complexion. Her birthparents can't keep their hands off her, it's so sweet. And how her mother calls her "baby". The love never left, but she looks overwhelmed by it.
Speaking about being a beauty, look at her sister. So amazingly pretty.
In China, calling their own child "baobei", which, in fact, means "precious" is equal to addressing kids "honey" in spite of age differences. I don't "baobei" should be translated as "baby" even though oftentimes younger parents do suppose the English word "baby" can be translated into "baobei".
I think (maybe I'm wrong, and they were just nervous because of the cameras) she is not used to much contact, I mean hugging and touching, because when I see her with her adoptive parents, their hug her but like in a soft way, I'm latina we are used to demonstrate care and love for friends and family with hugs, kiss touch, im not saying that her parents don't love her, but maybe, because of their culture, they aren't big huggers, if she were my daughter after such trip I would hug her more effusively, so I understand if she feels odd or overwhelmed with her birth parents demonstration of love, besides she didn't feel that longing for 20 years like her China parents did, she wanted to Know but she was raised with love, her birth parents waited and wondered for her for 20 years
It's her bio parents but at the end of the day they are strangers (not anymore)
I can only imagine how you could feel in this situation...
Her sister has father face and her mother bright skin, it's so beautiful to see them together.
The mom crying and the girl not knowing what to do or how to act. It's so hard to watch. As a mother, I can only imagine the pain that poor woman must be feeling. But to her daughter - she is a stranger. But to the mother, the daughter is a piece of her heart. A piece that was missing for so many years.
language barrier
She wasn't a stranger to her daughter. Her daughter loved her before they met. She said so.
it was so hard to watch because I understood both the languages
Adopted parents are more attachable when a child is brought up in a western culture where English language has become her mother tongue. As a 20 year old adopted daughter from an American family meeting her biological parents for the first time, she is more confused when she could not understand what her parents were talking.
@@clore.clorp. I mean it is in captions. So...
Kati has been doubly blessed with two sets of parents who truly love her very much. Glad that she has finally met her birth parents.
The best !Well said ！
Shout out to the American mum who did not forget to give her piano and violin lessons haha
Only the necessities lol
That's chinese culture alright indeed.
True asian mom, white or no!😂
it’s a viola
@@giandagostinomusic same thing it's just barely a different size
Can we just talk about how cute she was a kid??? Like that face and the bangs and glasses AWH
I actually thought she was an ugly duckling but turned out to be a beautiful swan.
still cute
@@sltga1254 cute and pretty aren't the same thing
Omg adorablee
She was one of the cutest kids ever. And I think arguably in general (not always) but in general, Asian kids are the cutest.
The fact that her biological mother gave birth to her on a boat and by themselves are so heartbroken. It must have been very painful.
@Channie Kun, Yes but they had no other choice. They were already in such a troublesome situation with their family and money.
Maybe it was a beautiful, not too painful moment either, like not every birth is hard. Humans have given birth in random places for thousands of years so it's pretty natural. I don't know i just prefer to think that it was not so bad.
@Channie Kun, and if they had given birth in a hospital they would have to sign the papers and get everything sorted. Which would be more struggling for both of them and their families. They have their reasons.
@@Osiwan960 Child birth is painful. End of story lol
@@cowmcmoose94 not always. You need to open your mind and see more ways of doing things than just what you know....
Being an adoptive parent is so difficult. You walk a very thin line. I don't think they get enough credit. People will always have something to say. Make sure you keep the kid close to their culture, make sure they know the language, make sure they learn their history. All the while, people forget how difficult it is raising a child as is.
Did you see the biological mum break down in this video? How can you blab after that how hard it is for adoptive parents. What an insensitive soul you must be.
So true, however I think they could have at least told her the story and that they had been in defacto contact with them.
Yeah but imagine giving your biological child up for adoption. People act like adoptive parents are saints or wtf but really, they were banking on a woman giving up her child in order to become parents. ISNT THAT QUESTIONABLE?
I will never understand their ungrateful attitude. Better they stayed orphans.
Maybe, but in this case they knew the agony of the birth parents and were selfish enough to ignore it. Kati was a US citizen by that point, it’s not like she would’ve been forced to stay in China after a legal adoption. It’s a kind of white parents that really make my blood boil imo. They erased her connection to her culture and hid her birth parents from her.
They made sure to keep the exact amount of lucky money each year that her sister received, because they truly loved their children equally even if they were only able to raise one.
I agree. Such a wonderful parents. 😭❤️❤️❤️ Maybe miles apart but always her in their hearts
Kai M 😭 sucks they didn’t meet earlier but so glad they are reunited!
pkap617 they had too or else the kid could be high risk of death and the parent would pay such a high pay fine. 🗿
@pkap617 Did you not watch the video?
As for the lucky money the father gave to Kati, it's composed of different versions, the black and white cash was used in the 1990s, the red one is used since 2000s, so I believe the parents really saved money to their abandonned daughter on every Chinese New Year.
As a Chinese, I think her Chinese father is an intellectual, the sentences in letter he left to his daughter was kind of an old literature style of Chinese that only educated people can write, and he used a old style writing brush to write the letter, and his writing is pretty good, which also shows that he was well educated.
qqd dfsd I’m glad to know this backstory. I was 99.9999% sure the dad was sincere when he said it, but that 0.0001% part of me wondered if he had just put it together at the last minute. I’m glad to see more evidence in favor of the former, which about clinches it for me
@@Amblin80s Me too. When I saw those old cashes which are not used now, I'm pretty sure they must have always been missing their second kid.
Why you gotta make me cry even more 😭
@@isax3980 if you know the social background, you may want to cry even more and more
golden tidbits, thanks! very sweet how continued to think of in their hearts & mind & acts.
It's so sad to see how there was a language barrier between Kati and her biological parents.
@Tina Zhou exactly!
It should be mandatory for those who adopt.
Christina Tan I can’t control my tears
Actually, the language barrier works as a defense mechanism in the beginning. It’s already an overwhelming meeting. Having to speak 24-7 would make it more difficult. Looks like she had a translator with her though.
@Tina Zhou why when she never needed it
Anyone who would criticise the biological parents does not understand the situation in China at that time. The biological parents did not have an abortion as they were required to do, they took incredible risks and defied a ruthless tyrannical government, and they gave their precious little girl the only gift that they could give her, her life. They have suffered terribly ever since parting with their precious little girl, their only consolation being that they know that their precious little girl is alive. I am so glad that they got to see their daughter as a young woman, and they can know that their suffering was worth it.
Exactly! Because of oppression of 2 child limit, there were countless abortions of many births, especially female babies. Infanticide was rampant because male infants are to keep their lineage prolonged. Now what? Many towns and villages suffer the imbalance.....too many males and not enough females. Perhaps now it's laxed and hoping....hoping..
The red envelope money is actually old bills not circulating anymore. So when they say they saved the money every year, they really did.
Wow! That means it is a rare item and more pricey!
@@FarhanPerdana I think it's worth far more to her than any monetary value don't you?
@@michaelafrancis1361 depends how you look at it
@@abaddonnoddaba9153 Try again.
She can exchange them at China National Bank
Her birth dad texts her good morning and goodnight everyday
😢😢😭😭
ismipurisa i liked because first cause it’s sad and second you had 666 likes :/
@@drhrheehhshshhehe9814 its not sad. its nice! its love.
Hope he's using watsapp or something similar otherwise it cost a bit.
exactly the same words touched me
My heart just breaks for her birth family. I hope that soon they'll all be able to meet her American mom and dad and get to know each other.
I think her adoptive parents were just terrified of losing her and unfortunately this created an environment where she didn't feel comfortable asking about her adoption.
Yes, they purposely kept her in the dark even though at a young age they knew she was very curious, stacking up boxes to get to the letters and information about her adoption, come on, the fact her real parents appreciate that they took care of her is why she forgave them
The fact Katy is their only daughter created that feeling. Should her adopted family had another (biological) daughter, the feeling of "losing a daughter" would not be that strong and got in the way.
At what point did she say it made her feel uncomfortable? They didn’t talk about it so she didn’t think about it.
@@tingtingnoy3133 “real parents” you’re a bad person. Your whole comment is fantasy.
@@GG-kn2se Obviously they meant biological parents, chill. It's more about how her adoptive parents never mentioned it and sort of prevented her from knowing about it until she was 20 when she had always shown that she was curious about her adoption, including the story of when she was young and asked her mom about "who's tummy she came from" and how she would climb boxes trying to get to the one that had her adoption information that was hidden from her. Not that I'm saying her adoptive parents made a bad call, cause there's a lot of complicated feelings when someone is in that situation that I can't speak on, but both your comments are pretty rude for no reason lol
I could understand the mother, the father speaks in a dialect that I’m not familiar with. But their anguish was obvious. And when they pulled out the lucky money, it had me crying. That’s what parents do every new year for their children.
what a surprise! i understand the father clearly but it’s harder for me to understand the mother. perhaps the dad has southern dialect and the mother is more northern?
@@eileengarfield hmm, could be. I could understand both, but maybe the father less. It feels unusual to be able understand what Kati, if things were different, could've understood directly from her biological parent's mouth...
Iam asian. That pocket money reminds me when my parents gave me a big chunk of gold worth $80,000 when i married the one i love. I never knew they have that much money because we are just an average family (almost poor). It was a 30 years saving. I was crying a river, and i realized they always thinking about me and my sister. i accepted it to respect them even tho i didn’t want to. But i use the money to help them a lot on their old days. Iam a blessed daughter.
Asian cultures such as the Chinese, Korean, and Japanese have the greatest respect for their elderely and familial bonds. Wish it's something the West would practice more...
@@Clos93 sweetie, indonesian, vietnamese, thai, and moreare also respectful asians that you shouldn't forget to mentions :)
Carlos Fierro Yeah and also Filipino, at weddings we give them the “shower of coins” it’s basically we throw gold coins at their feet to bloom love, youth and sincerity.
A strong family is worth more than gold!
God bless your parents and you!
If you are blaming families then you are not understanding the story. If you are blaming the adoptive parents then you do not understand love. If you are blaming the real parents then you do not understand history. This story is beautiful and I’m sure that Kati will continue to cultivate both sides of the family because of the overwhelming love they have for her.
jfeather503 i agree, don't blame either family in a situation like this. Like there's no ONE right way to handle something in a serious of a situation as this
jfeather503 They're both "real" parents. The corrective term is "biological"
jfeather503 8
jfeather503 very well said
and Kati has grown up to be a smart, understanding and wonderful person who has brought both the families togather so that nobody will loose anything or her
“Her birth dad texts her ‘Good morning’ and ‘Goodnight’ every day”
IM CRYING, THAT IS SO PURE AND SWEET AND WHOLESOME AFGH 😭❤️
Ugh, I would be annoyed, haha.
You have no evidence that they are her parents.
HKim0072 that is the rudest thing to ever say. Are you adopted?
I'm a Chinese American and I've watched this before, and remembered the story so I found myself watching it again. Without fail, it reduces me to tears. Kati is incredibly loved by both sets of parents. Her father particularly struck me with his unyielding tenderness. Hopefully she continues maintaining a strong connection with her biological family, and get to spend some time with her sister as well since she grew up not having one. Kudos to the adoptive parents too for raising her to be a healthy adult.
For those of you saying she looks awkward and uncomfortable, she probably is! She has never met these people and spent any days with them even though they are supposed to be her close parents. This isn’t some cheesy movie, it isn’t all butterflies and rainbows when you first meet your biological parents. You don’t immediately establish some kind of long lost bond as if you knew them your entire life just because they are related. Sure you might feel emotion and a connection but they are still basically strangers. It is really hard to try to be fully comfortable with people she’s just met, but I’m sure she is trying. Also keep in mind she doesn’t speak chinese so...it can get awkward with the language barrier when she can’t really express herself or understand them. But I’m sure she is trying very hard to spend good time with them, it’s just not easy!
howtopasstime this is totally what I got from their first meeting. It's an emotionally charged situation for everyone and the language barrier just makes it more difficult. It can't be easy on either side to have to wait for the translator to relay everything - no one really wants to talk about such personal matters through another person.
Also, the whole time was filmed too, with that much emotion and confusion. it wouldn't be too surprising that she detached herself from emotion.
Yes exactly! And it makes it really difficult when someone is showing such affection for you when you can't understand what they're saying as well. Even with an interpreter, they won't necessarily interpret everything.
howtopasstime very sweetly and well stated!
I totally agree!
She is not a parent and until she becomes one she can only relate as a child. I can not imagine the pain and guilt that her biological parents have lived with. You can clearly see that it has been immensely torturous on them!
My heart goes out to them and her sister.
My heart equally goes out for her adoptive parents who clearly love her greatly!!!
I completely understand their fear and protectiveness! All good parents would share the same emotions!
No one has the right to judge either sets of parents because clearly both sides love her dearly and only have done their best to protect her!
May God continue to bless both families as they continue to bond and create beautiful lasting memories together!
This is truly a beautiful example of no matter what culture we are from we ALL share the COMMON BOND OF LOVE FOR OUR FAMILIES❤️🙏❤️
You're absolutely right. I am an adopted child as well. It is hard for me not to feel akward with my biological father....
I started tearing up when her mom hugged her, crying hard and pleading forgiveness. ... my heart felt her cries.
Stephanie Sanchez me too
same, and I lost my breath for a moment when they were watching her play violin
And when it said her dad texts her good morning and good night everyday😭 I lost it
Aeternus I believe they probably traffic the little girls just like other countries. Makes me sick.
"You look so much like me, your mother, but you don't understand a word I'm saying" oh my gosh 😭😭😭
As an adopted child, I understand that they were afraid that they would lose her love. However if they trusted the upbringing they provided, they would see that they would never lose her love. My adopted mom is my mom. My birth mom is a friend.
I'm not adopted, but this was a comment I made after watching this. The adoptive parents needed to trust that they were raising her to be a responsible, wise, and thoughtful young lady. Someone they trusted to have good judgement. i also think that because they knew the biological parents were waiting all this time, and that adopted children most always want to meet the biological parents, and because it's the right thing to do, Kati should have been raised in a mix of cultures and traditions that included her Chinese Culture. And Mandarin lessons.
@@rebeccacaraska4112I agree!
S biological mom is A MOM in this case
Solid, measured take.
yes, im adopted too, it was kinda frusturating tbh
Her father doesn’t need HER to forgive him. He needs to forgive himself.
I mean they were forced to give her away or else she’d be killed or yeah :( because of the one child policy.
It’s nice enough that they decided to keep her and not abort her
@@_xiaotin8490 well it’s true, having a child more than one is illegal act for China, they usually want the child is male focus in the army, while female focus on becoming a housewife, etc. I knew that because I have a China aunt who came from China and now she resisted as a local resident.
Ps. I’m an Asian
xt _ fake. They have to pay more taxes if they have more than one child. They had no money to pay.
@@edai5645 really? I’m chinese and a friend of my mom secretly had a girl but she fled because she either had to abort it or pay a huge sum(a fine)
Blackveil Vaal hazak Chinese women are the most likely to work in the world. Housewives are not popular at all. I think you are taking about Japanese?
HER BIOLOGICAL DAD IS AMAZING
👏👏👏👏👏👏👏
So is her Mom and Sister !
He is sweet!
Rawest Channel i agree
I feel they are so pure 😭
"You look so much like your mum... But you dont understand what Im saying" My heart breaks for the pain that mother feels. I gave birth to my first child december of last year, and I couldnt imagine a life without him. I hope she went on to learn their language so they can communicate without an interpreter
Edit: it makes me so happy she's learning Mandarin 😭❤
Same! When she said that, it hit me like a truck.
Yeah……I actually had to pause the video for a moment when she said that!
I’m just like 😣 Ugh…and like idk why but holy shit that tiny little statement just hit me soo hard!
As a mother myself It is hard for me to even begin to imagine the pain that that mother(and father) had to be feeling every moment, of every day, for 20 years!?
FFS that’s rough 🥺
Me too. I hope she can stay close to them especially her sister. They bonded beautifully and interesting that Katie thought she had been left somewhere. Adoptees have memories because it's trauma.
I have two children who speaks only English... If I could turn back I would send them to language classes as todliers... Maybe Chinese Mondays and Spanish Tuesdays.... Languages is so important.... I can speak four
@@evamagone8613 it’s certainly easier to do as a toddler, but you can learn at any age. If they move to another country when they’re older (assuming by children you mean child age - how fun is English that you have to classify ‘grown/adult children’.
My uncle didn’t begin to learn a second language until he was 20. He learnt Spanish with no pre-existing entry structure of the language or similar beforehand, (60’s-70’s New Zealand education rarely included second language) . He’s a polyglot now, just through immersion with his advertising job, immersion is the best method after early introduction (speaking as a person who was involved in a long term toddler to adulthood piano teaching study/programme).
He speaks English, Spanish, Mandarin, Nihongo, French and Cantonese. As well as a handful of semi fluent languages,
I was introduced to second language at 12 and speak and write English, Spanish, Japanese and Welsh. I’ve got some Māori, Italian and French, latter two just having an easy connection to the Latin languages, and can do verrrrry basic German.
But I’d say a lot was self taught without immersion and my parents aren’t even bilingual. I don’t think I’ve got my uncles gift, although I have studied English linguistics, I just kept up the practice.
It’s never too late, you can begin to encourage them with your own immersion programme I’d they’re at home. They’ll speak their usual language at school and with friends, but you can create an immersion environment at home gradually. Start with colours, label objects like the fridge, begin to refer to them by the label name etc.
To have 1 parent that loves you more than anything is a beautiful thing!, but to have 4 parents who love you unconditionally is a beautiful blessing that no one should take for granted!! ❤
I think both families were fantastic.. but a big pat on the back to Katie who had the confidence, strength and kindness to show both families that she has room to love them all.
Your comment made me smile :) room to love all ❤️
Love has no boundary. Endless love. Beautify comment Karyn Honor.
I am tearing up over people I don't even know 😢 😭
I can tell Katie is very wise for her age and very smart. I'm inspired by her strength and maturity dealing with her past.
If you want ear the voice of a mother, ear this film. No one actresses in the world could nt do that. The soul of this mother was just in front of us ! Pure love ! God bless them.
i love how the biological dad just lit the fireworks in broad daylight "im in charge!"
That dad is awesome
It sounds just as badass in Chinese too, as if this is an area full of mafia and he's the leader or something
Lol!! That was so Adorable and Beautiful!!! I love them!!! 💗💞💕
The biological parents always holding her hands, like trying to make up all those years they missed her
Jalan Rina 😭
I love themmmm!!! 💗💗💞💞💞💗💗
The mom and sister combing styling her hair in the car!! Oh my gawww 😭😭😭
Too Flippin Cute!!!!
Don’t want to let her go!
i have family on my dads side that i see like every 6 ish years, like i just hardly ever get to see them because they live in a different country and when i finally get to see them again, they do the exact same thing, even the crying with the tightest hugs when we first meet, my grandma hugs me so tight that it feels like i'll bruise. it kinda makes me wanna cry because it's like that big reassurance and reminder of how much they really do love you after so long of not seeing them
😔😔😔😭
I'm glad it's not just me, a soft-hearted 72 year old dad, who cried big tears.
showing emotions is a beautiful thing. specially love. have a great day.
The poor biological mother. I watched her sit by the bio father as he talked about having to give her up and she didn't say a word but the second she saw her daughter for the first time she couldn't stop talking and crying. It's just heartbreaking and the daughter looked so out of place like she didn't know what to do. She was actually kind of stoic.
I don’t think she liked it that much even in the final speech she seems to have find not what she wanted
I can understand Katie feeling stoic seeing total strangers, even though their her biological parents, pour out so much emotion over her. I am sure she understood but emotionally how can she feel much for people she just met for the first time? I really felt bad for the biological mother the pain, guilt sorrow, etc over giving up her daughter the last 20 years and then seeing her the first time is overwhelming is an understatement.
@@bobmorane2082 she was followed by a filming crew with no privacy. And then there’s language and cultural barriers on top of that. No wonder she felt that way.
It's 20 years of guilt and sorrow of the birth mother. For Katie, I think she is very contended with her adoptive family, so meeting her biological parents is just to have some closure to her birth.
@@bobmorane2082 she said it was fulfilling
Today 60 years ago my mother left me in a garden in Hong Kong. I think about her a lot and I hope that even though distance and time separate us, she still think about me. I’ve got nearly no chance if ever meeting her, she might be dead for all I know, but this documentary does it for all of us who will never meet their parents. If my own parents cared as much as these parents did for Katie, then I am consoled.
Some parents just feel guilty and think they are not in a position to try to reclaim the love from their abandoned children. I knew a mother with such a mentality. When she moved to a new address, she didn't leave a message to her abandoned daughter who came to visit her sometimes. As a kid then, I could not understand her behavior, so my dad gave me that explanation.
谁都没有完美的人生，一切还是顺其自然好了。
I am very sure they did or do care as much and I am sure you were or are very loved and missed.
My mother abandoned me when I was 4 years old and I was not as fortunate as some of you. it was a horrible life I’ve been through.. I was abandon because I was a girl! But I still miss my mom...I pray everyday to God for hope to see her before I die😥🙏🏻
@@annhoskinson5318 keep your faith & hope. She is probably looking for you too 💘. I am a birth mom. I understand.
@@Cha4k no matter where we start we all end up where we are meant to be in the end. Family is not always blood. I wish you all the best.
When her mum hugged her and started crying, my eyes teared up.
Anonymous Phantom same I basically died so many happy tears
Anonymous Phantom me too
I just about lost it there too.
I started crying when she did
I fare worse than all of u! I cried at the first few minutes.. way before they even meet!
I am so glad that you went home and met your biological family for the first time. I understood every word that your parents spoke and it warms my heart to see that you all met again. The meal that she made you in her home was so elaborate and labor-intensive. It's the way Chinese moms show their deep love for you. I also loved the fact that your parents saved your Chinese New Year money for you knowing/hoping that they would be able to give it to you in person one day. I am thrilled to see that you are learning Chinese. It's the best way to connect to your roots. Congrats on a job well done.
the most painful thing is how much her biological parents seem like really great parents. they seem to be very gentle and caring and patient. and although they have always been hurting these many years, they never neglected her sister. of course we don't know the whole story/their lives but their humility and sincerity are really obvious in this documentary.
Thought so too, humility and blunt sincerity.
to me, the most striking thing is how much affection her sister seems to have for her. that would likely not be the case if the parents have been neglecting her while pining for kati.
maybe its has something to do with why they had to abandon her, or bc they were poor.. and the adoptive family first have to go through some paper work to establish a income that can support the adoptive kid... dont really know.. or maybe its bc its the most f###ing racist thing i read today... but im not really sure...
Lol that was the most condescending, American exceptionalist comment.. How do you know her Chinese biological family doesn't have "graceful manners" and a "beautiful speech pattern"? Do you know Mandarin?
Obviously she had it better in the U.S. given her biological family's situation, but there is ALWAYS shame and worry attached to giving up a child even if someone is poor! Poor people in the United States don't have it good either. Her parents didn't know what happened to her for years and felt a ton of guilt about giving her up, and who's to say she wouldn't have ended up somewhere terrible? The parents had no idea where she was, even if she was still alive.
@Asa Olsen lol trust me, I'm fine and don't have "emotional problems". It's ironic how you want to use the possiblity of someone having emotional issues as an insult when mental health issues have such a horrible stigma, and then you call ME the bully. How is calling out someone's condescending tone or trying to argue with their points "bullying"?
In the video you can see that her Chinese DOES feel pain and shame for giving her up. Even though she was given a better life, that doesn't mean that her family doesn't feel pain and loss even though they were poor. Yes, the standard of living is lower in China than in the West, but they probably questioned every day whether they did the right thing and probably still question it. I just think it's wrong to chalk up whether someone has "pain" for giving up a child to whether the child now has wealth or not. It's dehumanizing to the Chinese family.
The mom’s sobbing when they met broke me. How horrible she must have felt in that moment and all those years
Mothers love is so genuine. The best love.
same i broke down into tears smh
@Mike Chan they can't keep sons or daughters, at that time, you could only have 1 child in a family. They *had* to leave their daughter, otherwise they would be fined a lot of yen. The husband does seem really sorry about it, he's crying. Nobody was smirking throughout it all.
Broke me too. I blubbered.
Yes 20 years of emotional regret and guilt releasing!😕
When her biological mom fell into her arms on the bridge, I lost it. I could feel that deeply. So happy and so sad at the same time.
Tess W omg!!! Me too!! I was not ready
That was so sweet and I totallyyyy understand the moms reaction but I wouldn't advise bio parents to do that to a child upon first meeting. That's their personal space and they don't know you at all. You can see the uncomfortable and awkward face Kati has. But as a mother, I can totally understand the feeling of just collapsing when reuniting with your baby
@@SavageThrifter I understand where you are coming from as well but I have to say I disagree. They may not know her but she was created in the womb of that woman. Kati's blood and life comes from them. Kati may be uncomfortable but her mom needed to do this to be healed. She looked like to held on to so much pain and unforgiveness towards herself.
@@SavageThrifter
I think Katie understood. I think her uncomfortabilty came from not being able to comprehend what her mother was saying. But you can see her comfort her biological mother as she cries on the bench.
Same!! I really lost it.
As an adoptee who was forbidden to know my birth parents, I can say the ache never goes away. Science now points to a “primal” wound which occurs when a newborn is separated from the mother, the only contact they have ever known & bonded to in utero. My adoptive mother informed me that if I were to find my birth mother, I was not allowed to call her mother as she hadn’t earned it. That edict somehow broke my affection for my adoptive family. I finally learned the identity of my birth parents in my mid-fifties. Sadly my mother had died of lupus in her 20’s. But my father was still alive and keen to have contact. That connection was so healing. I understand the utility of adoption & the struggles of adoptive parents. But it must be understood that damage is done in separating a child, no matter the reason. And the need to connect to one’s origins is psychologically essential. It seems adoptive parents often create a narrative for themselves that negates/ignores the birth parent agony. Assuming a child doesn’t need their history & some kind of connection to birth parents is selfish and delusional.
Your real parents didn’t want you and now you’ve made the only people who did, regret their decision.
Sucks to be you
My heart goes out to you. You write beautifully.
Thank you for sharing. 🤗
That’s mess up what your adoptive parents did
The Chinese mom broke my heart. Look at how she was hugging Kati. I am in tears for her biological parents... She is so lucky to have another loving set of parents.. double the love
Is a blessing to have two sets of parents, you definitely get double the love. I'm fortunate to have been brought up by two families too, but it definitely hurts double when you have to say goodbye to both my fathers who coincidentally both passed away due to cancer. Still blessed to have both my mums around and they are the world to me.
She is so blessed. Both sets of parents are so kind, gentle and full of love. A breathtaking story.
like her bio mother said to her..you look like your mother
Her parents did an incredible job of raising her, and her biological parents did an equally amazing job of finding her. No one should blame anyone! She’s very young and still has her whole life ahead of her and she can do what she wants.
But still, I want to cry.
Very well said!
Finally, someone who gets the point of this video.
@@KitKat4Christ Oh, yes...I do. I was adopted at birth and had a wonderful family and life! I am an American and didn't have cultural differences. I could relate to her curiosity, but my Mom also worried about me meeting my birth mother...it's natural. I received a packet of letters from her that Mom had saved for me when I turned 18. I read them and cried, because I could see her handwriting was exactly like mine and she was only 18...my same age then. My story had some twists in that in the early 80s, I went to work for a VP of a large oil co., and in about 3 yrs. over lunch with a female accountant, we discovered that we were cousins! I was shocked and met her parents who I very much liked. I eventually met another set of older cousins, but I let them know I had no intentions of contacting her as long as my Mom lived, because it would stress too many of the family. I got lots of pictures of her, and her 3 girls and Doctor husband. I was amazed at how much I favored her! I did meet my maternal grandmother, and it was emotional for me, but she didn't know who I was! In a few years, I changed jobs and lost contact with the cousins. In the end, I was happy, learning a lot about my bloodline, and not having ventured into the unknown of this family. I learned years later that her daughters were told about me, and eventually they told my birth mother. So, maybe my birth Mother saw my pictures...I don't know. She passed away just before her 91st birthday, and her mother lived to 99.5 yrs! No regrets, because the woman who raises you in a loving Christian home from birth IS the true Mother!....
biological parents deserve all hatred - what kind of parents sends their kids away.
i started ugly crying when the dad said "i just want to tell her "baby i love you"" and just cried the whole way through after
I cried when he was telling that they are waiting for her
20042020 Mon. Just stumbled upon this story. Covid -19 became invisible while watching this documentary. " the Perfect teardrop."
Same here... I don't know when it started though
exactly the moment I just balled
So did I ... it's so touching
Truely a touching story, I just wish the adoptive parents made more effort in educating their daughter on her heritage, culture and language, especially knowing her biological parents were longing to meet her. I hope the families continue to connect with eachother and get to know one another.
Yeah, I wouldn’t recommend watching this in a library either.
made the same mistake lol
@@92heoHEo96 oh noo😭
HAISHAHHAHAHAHAHA
Dude my math teacher asked me why I was crying...
I watched it for the first time a few years ago in my school’s study area, and I was trying so hard not to cry so much. I was adopted from China in 2000 and every time I watch this I cry. Even though I have absolutely no recollection of China, it makes me so sad to know I’ll probably never know my biological family
There are two parts to this story that I love:
-They saved equal amount for their daughter (not about the money);
-Father texts her good morning and good night everyday.
This breaks hearts.
Northernspear her birth father is so sweet and genuine in the thoughtful things he does for his daughter.
I get the feeling that her Birth mom was so overwhelmed and traumatized by having to abandon her baby, that she did not know how to process the feelings. Finally, when reunited with her daughter after 20 years, all of those feelings came out.
I love that her birth parents both call her Baby❤️
Her dad melted my.heart.
I understand what you are saying💜
I felt the same when I saw how loving her birth parents were. What a lovely dad. I hope she sees them often.
Shes lucky to have 2 sets of parents that love her that much.
I.Agree
true
the adopting parents were so unbelievably selfish
@@leonandre7210
what do you mean?
@Leon Are you dumb?
I was also adopted from China, at only a year old by an American family in 2001. Ever since I was a little girl, I wondered who my real parents were and if they ever still think about me. As much as I love my adoptive parents and sister, I still would love to meet my original family one day and get to know more about them.
awww
Good idea to learn Chinese now.
I know pretty sure they love you and think about you. I hope you find your biological parents someday
I love how when they met on the bridge, the father gave the daughter a respectable amount of space because he knew it would be too overwhelming for her if he death-hugged her. Not to say that what the mother did was bad--I would probably do the same thing if I was her--but you can tell the daughter was kind of at a loss on what to do. The father was able to keep his emotions and impulses in check and save it for later, probably because he took into consideration the possibility that the daughter may not even want to be affectionate with them. I respect him.
hugging also isn't something that's done a lot in Asian countries, but you might be right too
I think it had to do with the cultural aspect of being respectful to women and giving them their personal space. East asian countries have more social boundaries about how men and women should act around eachother and pda in general. And of course there is the extra awkwardness of meeting for the first time. But yeah i'm sure you are also right about him feeling guilty/undeserving and wanting to respect her feelings as well.
While I can kind of imagine how emotional it must have been for the birth mother, I think I would have had a very similar reaction to Kati’s - she seemed overwhelmed and kind of stunned. It might sound heartless and of course I come from a very different culture, and China’s policy was horrendous, but it feels like the bio mom made it all about herself and her feelings. The first thing I would have liked to hear from her would’ve been something like “did you have a good life?”.
I might be projecting here though...! 20 years ago I reunited with my father after 20 years of separation. He hardly asked me any questions about myself and mostly focused on telling me how my mom took me away from him (she didn’t : a family court judge did, and for good reasons). I can sympathize with what he went through, but I was like “um, I’m the child here... you wanna maybe try and make an effort to be a parent, even for a minute?”
I respect the bio father and sister for giving Kati her space, though.
@@jean-francoisdaignault9612 the parents were living with guilt their entire life's. It was an sudden overwhelm for them to see their daughter after years after abandoning her. Their hearts were really heavy and the moment they saw her they wept for forgiveness... I mean it's kinda what they would have done becoz of their guilt..
And obviously later on they might have asked how r u? R u well? ... I mean it's just how I felt.. Although i am certain they make sure she was doing well..
millennial twins yes of course, and I can hardly imagine how they felt, and it must have been overwhelming like you say. I guess I can relate to Kati more easily, coming from a similar culture and having been on the receiving end of an estranged parent’s overwhelming expression of their feelings.
"Her birth father text her goodmorning and goodnight everyday" aww
Laura Sierra man, I shed even more tears when I read that! 😩
He seems like an absolute angel.
That made me CRY!
One small detail reveals Katie's biological parents' feeling are genuine, not out of guilty or because in front of a camera. The money in the "red envelope" they saved for Katie every year are very old Chinese bills that were circulated in the 90s. These bills are out of the market and rare nowadays. Katie must have been in their mind every year for a long time.
that's what they said. They gave the same amount to her as her sister got (EVERY year) .. 20 years of $$ envelopes
Yeah and its sad that the adoptive parents waited sooo long to tell Katie. Or I dont think they were planning on tellin katie unless Katie asked. But what if Katie never asked Bout her biological parents? Then her precious parents frm China would never see her. Jus imagine? Thats sad..
As an Adoptive Mother of a Korean young woman now this broke my heart. All I wanted was to share the amazing gift with the people who made her possible.
I see adoptive parents who not want to think that child ever belonged to anyone but them but it did. You lose nothing by sharing and they can give that child parts of themselves they need. How lucky and complete will that child be to know and love four parents. It takes nothing away from the birth parents or the one’s that raised them. It gives balance and a full identity.
I have wished this for my daughter always. No one ever came but each Country is different and I know the shame Korean women were made to feel and still are. I don’t believe for a minute she didn’t want contact.
I’m happy that she has decided to improve her mandarin. It would break down the barrier that still separated from her parents when she spent time with them
+1
sel99100 YB a
My husband was left at an orphanage in the Philippines as a baby. He was left in a basket at the doorway with a note wrapped in the blanket with him. The note said that his mother was scared, and that she had tried to keep him but had no choice but to leave him for his own safety, and that she would always think of him and love him. She said what his given name was, but no last name. She asked that they take care of him. He was adopted 2 years later by American parents and has had a great life here. The note is still in his adoption documents and it makes me cry everytime I see it. So this story hurts my heart but is so beautiful and miraculous at the same time.
I'd love to talk to him!
Did your husband get to know his birth mother...?
I suggest, you could approach the famous Philippine program 'Tulfo in Action'
@@evangelineventura9026 KMJS has greater influence.
It would be hard to track your husband's biological parents(or his mother) because they didnt leave any clue and just his name without the surname.its like finding treasure in a haystack. regardless, wishing all the best to your family.
The love ... is so pure. I can't stop crying.
I agree. Very touched
Ellen Henderson me too☹️
Preach. 😢😢
me too😢😢😢
I also cried all the way through the video.
24:05
Seeing the older sister crying got me, damn it. As heart wrenching as it was to see the parents and as much as I empathize as a biological parent myself, there’s also a lot of pain there for both her and her bio parents on that front, and a lot of pressure being put on her from her birth parents because of their own guilt and longing. But with her sister, none of that is weighing on them and neither of them have other siblings that will complicate the feelings via comparison, so they can have the chance to actually develop a normal sister relationship. For that reason, seeing her sister crying for me. Having gained a sister, and then lost a sister, and then gained a sister again, only to somewhat lose her again to the distance and language barrier (without a translator once she leaves), it just hit me deep in my gut. Maybe it’s because I always wanted a sister but I really hope they all stay in touch and Kati and her sister are able to form a real sister relationship and bond.
The girl did not shed a tear and I'm here balling my eyes out
Amen to that
The crying was done behind camera.
And thats not her problem
I know, me too!!😭😭😭
Don’t forget how young she is, and on camera. Not all people want to show strong emotion in front of others.
Wow... 22 years of red envelopes... They really had her in their hearts all that time
Yup right after ditching their infant daughter in a market..... Asian love for sure.
434x18 hey buddy, you finish the video? Or even heard of the one child policy?
20 years, youre watching this two years later
Steven Jung Still the only reason she turned out the way she did or even alive and well at all is because of the kindness of strangers.
434x18 ok...? Thanks for sharing how simply your mind works. Good luck in your life man, you’re going to need it.
A real mothers love never dies and a real mother does what is best for their child. I fully support her adopted and biological parents.
Gabby E "real"=more like "good", in your line
Anita Diaz a real MOTHER is a good mother by default
Gabby E a real mother?! What? Her “real” mother left her on the street! Wtf! Even if I would have to die for my kids I would never leave them on the street
Joana Messerli you realize they would have killed her or taken her away anyway and they did what was best because they love her. Did you watch it?
Joana Messerli you privileged white girl. you don’t understand what it’s like until you experience it. it was a different world then in china especially, don’t speak about something you have no awareness on
Kati is a good woman. She appreciates and can feel how much her parents love her and the feeling was instantly mutual. I like the way she handled it and how comfortable she made her parents feel.
I agree with the daughter completely. They should have consulted her. It's an international adoption, so there was no risk of truly losing her (legally). Their logic was non-logic. They just avoided it. Parents often avoid the difficult thing.
Yes, i feel she has sympathy for her biological family and slight resentment towards her adoptive parents
Yes, i feel she has sympathy for her biological parents and slight resentment towards her adoptive
Because of their OWN fears, she could have missed the chance to ever speak to her bio parents. I have seen this too often, where people don't tell the adopted children, and then a bio parent passes away...had a friend who wasn't told until she was in her 30's, and never got the chance to hug her bio parents....
Actually in china the govt always takes the chinese side. Many cases of half chinese half british/canada/usa/etc born in those countries and kidnapped back to china by chinese parent and china refused to return them
@@Adelicows i think you should only adopt if you can't have your own. Why would you use your resources to raise another persons genetic offspring and limit your own. Blood is thicker than water, this chinese girl will grow closer to her bio parents and more and more distant to her adoptive parents . I would of destroyed the letter, im investing in this child I want a return on my investment.Whether that investment is money,love or time/company.Now this chinese young lady will have to support two sets of parents but her bio parents will be top of the list, as china doesn't support the elderly. She'll also spend time there which could of been spent with her adoptive parents. So in the end the adoptive parents invested probably 100k plus for what? I have 5 of my own and will never adopt, but if i were infertile i'd adopt and would make sure zero contact with bio parents.Also adopting a different race of child from your own is hugely problematic , this girl don't love or care for her parents and they grow to hate you because they don't look like you. This video is a great example at 1.40 m.ua-cam.com/video/pvvsjs24UkE/v-deo.html
I was also a victim of the one child policy, my mom almost gave up on me, luckily they didn’t. But my birth costed them a fortune, we were not a wealthy family, after paying the fine, there were nothing left in the house, throughout my childhood, I had never had a new toy or new clothes, and my parents had to work so hard that they seldom spent time with me. I used to complain but now I understand how hard they have been trying to keep me with them.
I'm glad to know that. Good luck on your future endeavors!
I’m sorry you had to go through that I really hope you have a good life
You must have had a really tough childhood though, but I´m happy for you that evverything went well.
see? Fiona didn't get left for dead. make damn sure you want to and are ready to have a child before you do. that's the lesson of the story here. kati's parents in the video almost didn't learn that lesson.
@@quickstep2408 what if the family is poor?. maybe them were rich
Tears rolling on my cheek when her biological mother said ... oh my baby 😣😣 ..
TEARS COMNG DOWN MY CHEEKS TOO .
The same here...
She is a cutie
Streeeaaaming! I can't remember the last time I've teared up like that.
Surya get.shipstation.com/free-trial/?ref=online-facebook-ads&hs_fb_account_id=63005939&hs_fb_campaign_id=6080320080184&hs_fb_adset_id=6080320178384&hs_fb_ad_id=6080320178184&hs_parent_creative_id=6080770082184&source=an&AKB+-+FB+-+Remarketing+-+LPis Sra
What a beautiful reunion. I can see how deeply sorry the parents are. They still love her from the bottom of the heart after 20 long years.
Number one rule in parenting: Always be honest with your kids.
cosmo_rebeljdal97 they’re christians, honesty is not in their vocabulary.
@@mb61j2 bruh don't justify people by their religion
TheYellowFLash XD justify? Wtf do you speak English bro?
@HardcoreRomeo: Sad that you’re so prejudiced.
JurzGarz prejudice is a preconceived opinion that is not based on reason or actual experience. I can assure you my statements do not meet that definition as they are absolutely based on actual experience. Sad you’re not intelligent enough to understand the distinction.
I cried so hard at “mum is so sorry” a part of me wishes I could have this moment too with my biological Chinese parents. Where ever they are I wish them healthy, happiness and peace. My name was Qiong Zhang. And my orphanage was in WuHan. I doubt they will see this but if they do, to my biological parents: I understand and I don’t blame you. I have a loving adoptive family too. Thank you for your sacrifice.
I suggest you could post your wish on weibo.com , a Chinese vision of twitter. I think that will help you to find your birthparents.
I pray that you will find your biological parents too like Katie.
jasmine grace thank you that means a lot to me
As a believer in my faith I pray you find your family and have all your questions answered and be the happiest you’ve ever been. Amen :)
I can't even imagine what
you've already gone through but from your comment..you seem like a really great person.I wish I could help somehow..but I don't have capability..But I'll definitely pray for all your happiness..Be happy..keep smiling..And always remember your an awesomely beautiful person
She's experiencing culture shock. American Suburbia is very different than a proper Chinese street market. I hope she learns Chinese and gets to experience all the interesting things there.
For sure. She was a very awkward and looked uncomfortable when her parents were talking to her from a close distance.
See one thing is how would the adopted parents cover up the fact that she was Chinese... like I’m not saying adopted parents should not tell but how could they have covered it up either ? But both parent sets are really nice 😊👏
@@varshakaul9587 The adoptive parents didn't cover up the fact that she was Chinese. They were open from the start, telling her she came from a woman's tummy in China. What they didn't do was reveal to her all the details about her adoption.
Yeah..... She's American.
She’s moved to China and is talking with her birth family!
Bawling my eyes out!!! As soon as her mum hugged her lord have mercy all that love over flowing is just priceless!!! I hope everything has been amazing for all of them ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️🇬🇧
Need an update
I would have forgiven the parents because that one child policy was brutal. Especially since Katie was a female. If they would have kept her she most likely would not be alive nor her family. Sad really.
+Spike Spiegel-I think it is pretty clear that they very much always wanted to be a parent for a next child. They never wanted to give her up if they had the choice, and the dad even said when she started crying where he surrendered her, it took his brother to hold him back from going back to her and taking her back with him. They were destroyed giving up Katie, surrendering her is arguably the most heartbreaking trauma they ever had to go through, and they probably still don't forgive themselves for having to surrender her in the first place.
I don't think there's anything really to forgive. They were caught in a bad situation they couldn't escape. If they had kept Katie, the "kindest" punishment they would've been given would have been such a high fine that their families probably could not afford and would've bankrupted them entirely. If they would have been able to hide Katie away, she never would've been allowed to go to school, no anyone outside the family, have a normal life, and be locked away for her entire childhood. And if she was found out that she was a second girl in the family, there was a very good possibility she would've been killed. Taken away in the middle of the night where they never see her again.
I think they realized as the second child during that horrendous, wrenching era, Katie would never have been afforded a quality life. She never would've been happy, and she may have been taken away and murdered by the system just for being alive. They gave her up not just to protect their family, but to save her. By giving her up, she had a chance at a good life that they couldn't give her.
And the fact they couldn't give her that, it destroyed her mother. She kept on sobbing that she failed Katie as a mother. She felt that if she was a "good mother", she never would've agreed to give her daughter away. But there was very little else she could've done in that situation. Especially if no one close to her was willing to adopt Katie so Katie would at least grow up knowing who her biological family was. She had to make the most difficult decision of her life, and she never wanted to.
These are truly very wonderful, extraordinary people. And it hurts that they will probably never forgive themselves for what they were forced to do. I think they should, Katie has forgiven them and has no ill will for what they were forced to do, and I think they should be less hard on themselves. Understand it was a decision made they never wanted to, but a decision they had to to save their family and give Katie a chance at a good life. The "one child policy" era is littered with so many tragedy that is still sending out ripples today but what they were forced to do was not their fault. So forgive yourself and don't let that regret weigh you down. All you can do is just spend the rest of your life getting to know her.
She said her father wants her forgiveness but she feels no need because there is nothing to forgive. I don't see any resentment for her birth parents as she understands the position they were in.
I came from China, grew up that time, it's all lie from biological parents. They would not be killed if they kept her, they gave birth in hoping the second child is a boy, otherwise they would've done abortion in earlier stage of pregnancy, that's how my sister accidentally pregnant but aborted because of one child policy. But in so many places couples were still hoping getting pregnant again if their first child is a girl. That's why they gave birth, in China you can't know unborn child's sex, because people didn't want girls that time, government wanted to prevent abortion of girls. If it was a son they would keep, but they wouldn't have government support for their second child. That's all. It is quite cruel for her biological parents to use all means to get her heart, considering she has parents and family where she grew up with. The biological parents are not good people, the story they were telling definitely not true. But the adoptive parents are being white people, which currently is the target of world wide condemnation and bullying, so no one truly feel what they are feeling. I guess the emotion always clouded our eyes, prevented our fair judgement.
@@Gigi-ki8xiplus they didn't even have lots of money, so they couldn't raise her even if there was no one-child policy, they could either let the child suffer with them or possibly find them a better home where they could be fed, the father even waited for someone to pick up the child and could only hope that the person had a better situation than them. plus they were definitely thinking about her because the money in the red envelope is old currency. Raising a child is a big deal, my parents have probably spent over a million dollars on me and as the last child, they also gave/give me more attention than my siblings because they were still young when they gave birth to my sister and my brother and didn't have a lot of money and worked a lot, they were only able to raise them because of my grandma who helped take care of them. they are in a much better place now they own a firm and are great lawyers. almost every parent has a reason to give up their child.
@@Gigi-ki8xi Wow. I didn't consider this perspective. Thank you for posting it.
I'm also adopted from China and I burst into tears when her bio mother started crying. It was touching in a way I've never felt before.
Oh boy, maybe it’s a female thing (not to stereotype). I would have freaked out if my biological parents would have sobbed like that during the first meeting.
@purple peter It's anecdotal. Used to belong to a yahoo group (lol, yes. long time ago) with Korean adoptees. Mostly talked to female adoptees and there seemed to be more emotion involved.
Also, went on a binge youtube watching thing with adoption meetings. Dudes never cry when when meeting their birth families, me included. I think I might have teared up a bit when I left. edit: I remember now. I looked back at the airport and saw my sister (biological). And she was crying. I was closest to her in the whole trip there. Boy, yeah. That stuck with me.
I FELT THE SAME, its hard to exlain, i was watching though out the video but when
THAT moment came in suddenly i started to cry so hard, it was like a human instinct i had never experienced it, anyway hope youre doing welll
Olivia Gerdemann My sister and I are both adopted, I’m from Guatemala while my older sister was adopted from China. When my parents adopted her, someone who worked at the orphanage or helped to arrange the adoption told my parents that they should remain in touch with another set of parents of another baby girl. The babies looked strikingly similar but my sister had longer hair. They remained in touch and suspected the girls might be related in one way or another. After about 10 years they got the girls blood tested and found out not only were they twins but IDENTICAL twins. They kept in touch all throughout their lives with plenty of visits and vacations together. I have memories of my sister’s twin coming over to stay for a week or so and memories of them speaking on the phone so often. They were truly inseparable. We still have no information on their parents; however, I believe her twin has become interested in her heritage and is nearly fluent in Mandarin and visited China several times.
As for me, I have some information on my foster family and managed to reconnect with my foster sister (who was my main caregiver) over Facebook at 13 or 14 and I had a friend who was fluent in Spanish help translate for me and I just sobbed hearing her tell me she wondered what became of me and how I looked and what I was doing nearly every day. I don’t know very much at all about my biological mother but I look like a carbon copy of her. I turn 18 soon and I’ve thought about maybe trying to find her but after watching this, I think I have to.
@@gabbykabins4333
I'm not saying this to discourage you by any means instead I'm doing it as a warning.
If you want to find about your biological parents it's alright, but you should be very cautious about it. In this video all went well and the biological parents were very loving and caring, but you never know.
Panama isn't China, there is no "one child policy", so there must be another reason and who knows.
What I know is that Latino people are very close and caring about family (I'm Spanish), if someone in the family is in need, the rest of the members come to help. Also that in Panama or Latin America in general life costs aren't expensive at all.
So starting from those statements, I can't come up with a good reason why would any mother give her child in adoption.
So just be careful, and more if you don't speak Spanish.
She is very collected, understanding, mature..
Her biological parents are very nice, sympathetic..
Her adopting family did a great job raising her..
All I see is beautiful souls in this video..
every animal or insects dont have money they still have baby and raise them
the parents who leave their child like that is are shittiest
dont show sympathy to them
that type of people care more about them selves then anyone
if she loved her so much she would die to be with her not leave her
@@copiumclipirl9299 stop replying that on every fkn comment dude
@@e-lisa7503 copy pasta 🍝
I cried my heart out watching this! We adopted our loving chinese daughter when she was an infant and i always wonder how the biological parents feel and i so wish they could know what a wonderful little lady she became and how much we love her!!
@@e-lisa7503 x 12 has a valid comment
I saw a documentary once about a chinese girl, who was the second child of a family and essentially lived in hiding. She did not go to school, had no friends, was basically like in a prison. A terrible life. So I think, Kaiti's biological parents took the right decision. I am very sorry for them that they lived through such a difficult situation. I really hope they all come to terms with that history and can create something of a relationship.
Imagine how much guilt and frustration the big sister feels too, your parents had to leave your baby sister on the street cos they already had you 😭
They didn't have to leave their baby on the street, they chose to.
@@PraiseTheFSMonster they chose to because the baby could've died. For the baby it was either death or the opportunity of being saved. They chose to give her a chance, even if they weren't sure that she'd be saved.
@@Aeyaoo_11 If the government found out that they had a baby, they would have put it in an orphanage. You know when she could have died? When she was left on the street.
@@PraiseTheFSMonster no, there were consequences for having a 2nd child, including forced sterilizations, large fines imposed, and even in some circumstances, women were tied up for induced abortions. So yeah, the family was poor and they couldn't afford paying. They didn't want the government to kill the child, and to leave her in a child care place they would have to pay too.
@@Aeyaoo_11 People had second children ALL THE TIME. It was a huge problem. The government put those children in orphanages, which weren't great but the kids stayed alive and they got food, water, clothing and shelter. These people left their baby on the street, where it could have starved, been killed, been kidnapped, or been put into human trafficking. If they wanted to leave it somewhere, they could have dropped it off at an orphanage, at a church, or at a police station. But they chose to leave it under a table at an outdoor market where anything could have happened. Those parents are monsters.
As a Chinese citizen living in Texas, I know quite a few Chinese kids, who were adopted in China by American families. They are as amazing as you can expect. Upbringing with love, care and compassion has, in a real sense, transformed the spirit and mind of the kids in a positive and loving manner. Kudos to those adoptive parents!
Paul Gu o
itsthecatlyfe21 TV I agree:)
Paul Gu...ALL children deserve to know who their "biological" parents are, especially when adoptive parents have the info. I KNEW this would fall back on all those adoptive parents running to China over 20 years ago in order to avoid the intervention by local, biological parents. I feel it terrible these adoptive parents withheld biological parents info from Katie for 22 yrs out of "FEAR" that their daughter would leave them & love their biological parents! I have NEVER met an adopted adult who did not want to KNOW their "biological" parents. Whether good or bad, every child is entitled to know.
Recently I've watched videos shot by Chinese TV stations about the rest of this touching story and grown to love both sweet parents even more. In 2014 I went to an appointed hospital for a body checkup in Guangzhou, China, where candidates planning to leave for US for the 1st time were required to receive a bunch of physical checkups before going . I found out there was a separate area in the hospital where the American adoptive parents were there with their lately adopted kids for the similar body exam. My gosh! I almost burst into tears while watching those kind foreign parents holding their Chinese babies with love, care and smiles. I really admired and appreciated the selfless and generous spirit of those adoptive parents. In addition, much to my astonishment, most of those little ones I saw there at the hospital had various congenital physical defects, which, to numerous Chinese families, is not accepted because of the anxieties or fears about burden, shame and trouble, etc..
And In China, esp. in the remote countries, the notion of preferring to have boys to girls is quite ingrained too. If the second or third born is still a girl, her parents or grandparents won't feel unbiased and satisfied. The girls are either not treated well enough or given away to other people to raise. What's more, some families would even sell the girls to other families or even human-traffickers. Further, if the baby, either a girl or a boy, is born disabled or has some congenital health issues, some families will abandon them under stress. Lots of the Chinese parents, many of whom tend to compare themselves with others, think children, as their own asset belonging to them, should glorify the name of their family by being successful, healthy, good-looking, wealthy, famous or showing enough filial duty.
Granted, blood is thicker than water. However, in my own experience I have known several of adult friends who know their biological parents but are unwilling to meet with them; I also know or have heard about even a few of those who've never wanted to know about their biological parents after they knew from sources that they had been traded or discarded like goods or unused objects by their birth parents. Concerning the story about Katy, I remember reading a Highly Liked comment from an adopted adult on a very famous website in China. She wrote when she realized she had been traded with around 3000 Yuan by her biological parents, she was heart-broken and would never want to meet her biological parents; the day she was traded signified the day of the start of a new relationship with another family. After pondering my experience and Chinese culture combined with the psychologically dark sides of human nature I kind of know why in China most of comments about Katy's story are awfully mean, negative and even revengeful towards her biological parents even though according to the story, Katy's Chinese parents had to leave her owing to the threat of forced abortion.
The reason Chinese people are so angry with her birth parents may be that a large number of Chinese people regard what the Chinese parents have done as an epitome and revelation of a series of ugly aspects of life in China. While I disagree about the angry and complaining voices in China since the biological parents of Katy were also the victims to then Chinese politics, it still bothers me that due to their own reasons many other Chinese parents at last have chosen to abandon their kids who might become a Chinese Nick Vujicic, Oscar Pistorius or Faith Hill in the future. Meanwhile, unfortunately, through the Internet, the tones of revenge, hatred, selfishness arising out of cruel abandonment spread very fast and they even hang over the younger generation who may not be involved in any of the similar experiences; this may reverberate for a long time. The adoptive parents in Katy's story are the light to the world, and I wish we had more of those people in my country. Please join me in the prayers that whether they are adopted or not the kids will be brought up with love, care, compassion and grace instead of being influenced by anger, hatred and revenge and ungratefulness.
I'm adopted and do not want to know. It is different for everyone but I do agree that the choice to know or not should be given to each child (or once they become older and more interested) if the information is available.
"I've finally seen you, my daughter."
That got me right away.
This story was so wholesome. I definitely teared up when I saw her birth mother cry. It must’ve been such a heart wrenching choice having to give their younger daughter up. But thank God they were able to reunite. May God bless both her birth parents and adoptive parents. They both obviously love her very much.
When her birth mother hugged her crying and begging for forgiveness I felt it in my soul. I couldn’t hold back the tears 😭
Me too I started crying so much I’m a mom too and I felt their pain.. I’m so glad this is happy ending and and I cried of joyed
Same. I don’t think it’s possible not to cry seeing that
Maybe too much guilt shown as for the first meeting. I think the father's attitude is more appropriate. This is not that I don't understand the mother but I think they should have had support from a psychologist before they meet her
I am 28 years old. I have never had a child but I cannot imagine the depth of searing pain in her soul. It absolutely broke me in two and I sobbed and sobbed.
Same, me too. I’m adopted from China as well and always wondered about my birth parents
As a girl who has also been adopted from China, she got the outcome I wish I could have. I'm so happy she found her parents.
Same tho
I wish you all the best....should you choose the same outcome.
I love the cosplay in your pfp :) Todoroki!
I wish you upcoming fulfillment in whatever you dream....No matter how "good" a family she was adopted into, it must be a lifelong inner journey to wonder who and what was left behind. We all want inner peace.
Her mother was very vocal and emotional-but her fathers heartbreak is palpable. She has been blessed with two families who love her. God bless them all ❤️
her bio parents are the kindest souls, honestly I know this was a very complicated situation, but I fell mixed feelings on how her adoptive parents handled the situation. My parents never hid anything from me, like I felt second hand betrayal from them being so hush hush and hiding it for soooooo many years.
Exactly