Hopefully you got out or get out before the mental, emotional pains manifest physically....it'll kill a person because the body becomes so incredible inflamed from the chronic stress and fear.
@@ritakunnunmal4226 it doesn’t have too, though even after my parents being gone now twenty years, my daughter still answers the phone with: is everything okay? during those days we never new if my brother or sister were still alive and every time we would get a call from family, that is how we would answer. what you need to do, i promise if you do this sincerely it will free you and give you a new life. first you admit that this situation is driving you crazy, that you are powerless over it and you can’t take it any more! then ask Jesus, who has been knocking on the door of your heart, to come in and take over. then go to church on a regular basis, find a group, a 12 step group. the 12 steps works for every problem. i choose the Catholic church. they have mass everyday. there are a lot of broken people there, but didn’t Jesus say i ‘m not here for the healthy but for the sick. Keep going back it works! but it takes time. be patient with yourself. Get to know Mary, she was Jesus’s mama and she wants to be our spiritual mother too. there are Catholic radio and tv stations that i listen to in the day time and at night that lift my spirit and i am never alone. God Bless you, You will soon feel better then you ever have before 💕🙏💕😊💕
@@Lennie6357 hi Lennie, thank you for affirming me. if you have been in any 12 step program, you know forgiveness has different layers, like an onion. Just when i think i have forgiven my parents an old memory pops up and i have to work through that one. one of the most important things i have learned, i learned from my daughter. how important a sense of humor is!!! being able to laugh at ourselves and others give us so much relief 😅 God bless you on the road to healing 💕🙏💕😊💕
That is for sure! At least with me when i do stand up for myself it makes things worse for me. Then he does more abuse. I am damned if I do and damned if I don't. They can not take any responsibility for their actions and blaming you for everything and anything even though they are the one at fault.
I strongly agree i was born into narcisstic parents home. I grew up with them also, the amount of chronic stress and anxiety and worry is so dangerous. A child can have health problems as young as 13 from narcisstic parents. Narc parents are the worse because you cannot choose your parents you share an unwanted connection with them. Lifelong blood contract. At least you can choose spouses. You can choose to become a parent but you cannot choose your parents. Tough pill to swallow.
My mother, now deceased was a narcissist. Her abuse as well as my father's domestic violence resulted me into having a mental breakdown resulting in me having to go for inpatient care at a mental hospital for severe anxiety and depression. Then I had to go for long term outpatient care. My doctor said it best. He said "there is nothing wrong with you, you're problem is that you are living with a toxic poison in your life." After my parents died, my life got better. No child should have to suffer the way my siblings and I did. These people are toxic as hell. I recovered from depression and am now focusing on my life and living my dreams. I sing in my church choir and am taking professional vocal lessons. I'm not living my life as the narcissist's victim. That's all behind me. I'm finally free from this. Life is great 😊
@@angelamwatts my life is so much better since they are gone! i am working on forgiveness. they were both sick, some are sicker then others, so i pray for them both. i hope the prayers help them, they are helping me one day at a time.
After finally breaking free of a 25yr marriage and her cult like family I was trying to get back to doing things I liked. The weird part was how it was a real effort to go and do anything. It was like I had to push myself hard to make that first step to do something I loved, like I had an invisible force field trying to hold me back, stop me. Still kind of battle with this. It feels like you don't have the right to do these things which make you happy. I think any of us that wake up to narcissists soon discover that we have been surrounded by them our entire lives beginning with either one or both parents. Great video. Peace!
I know exactly what you mean bro. My wife's family were like flying monkeys and my wife turned from being a covert narcissist into an full on rage overt narcissist, once I started cutting her supply and I filed for a divorce (19yrs married). I'm now remembering my old original self and it's like meeting a stranger for the 1st time. I sing and laugh and I'm more relaxed and confident in myself again. So many years of sad loss but thank God I got help and found hope.😊
I grew up in a narcissistic household. By the time I was in high school I realized that my father needed others to boss around to feel powerful. Some become narcissists if they grow up in that environment, and some become people pleasers. I'm fortunate to have empathy intact. Setting boundaries and saying no is something I have trouble with but I'm getting better. I have stopped accepting the blame when others try to dump it on me. If I have an issue I'll calmly bring it up and see how the other person responds. That determines how the relationship moves on from that point. I put my faith in actions, not words. I find it VERY difficult to accept there are people in this world who go out of their way to harm others and refuse to acknowledge their hurtful actions. I'm not sure I'll ever be able to wrap my head around that one. It makes no sense to me.
@tmo.48, God definitely created evil. He created Satan. Also, he created others that he commanded them to do evil things. The god portrayed in the bible is a terrifying, horrible, immoral monster who absolutely disregards human life. He killed millions of people, including babies.
4 year relationship with a Narc. Caught him cheating with a woman he had been with behind my back… he had been with her 8 years. I’ve been verbally abused, emotionally abused, and physically. No more. Trying to comprehend this all. On disability for a few weeks because of this all. Depression, anxiety, can’t eat or sleep. This was very helpful information. Praying for you all!
That's terrible. Sick what they did to you :( :( I'm so glad that you're away from them. It will be difficult to feel better but you will one day. Peace & lots of love to you
Ill add another dimension. When divorcing a narcissist, they throw up accusations of abuse. Mine told the judge I was dangerous because:"He's in the Marine Corps and has access to MACHINE GUNS.And when we argue he says things that hurt my feelings." And the judge granted her TRO, which messed up my career to the point, my command told me I should get out. Get my divorce, then come back. The stress of having to find a new job, place to live, and save enough money to not only hire divorce lawyer but defend myself from her accusations of the tro. Add to the fact, I didn't see our child from age 1 to age 3-1/2. He didn't know who I was. But, I still had to pay child support.?? Lawyers took their time, padded their bills. In the end, I actually got custody.
29 year marriage to a CN has caused depression, dependency, recently hair loss, severe anxiety. In process of separation but still live together i am still afraid to do anything without him because it is engrained in me to feel guilty like I am doing something wrong. I cry all the time, and feel EXTREMELY lonely.
7 yr here. got divorced he is in my house. Bought an RV. everything is my fault. Blame. etc. he will never apoligize. If i am around him I now have my phone on audio record if ever around him. I record his outbursts. Not sure why but Its recorded for now Fibromyalgia hits hard. i het flare ups. I stay involved in community have home group vidit for my politics. he disappears and tho we share same political beliefs he wont stay for our home meetings potluck. Those who show up I consider my real family . He is Jeckyl n Hyde personality. all recorded. I put my phone on audio record in the meantime just for future 'spite'?
Out of 36 year relationship, (32 married), 8 months now. Destroyed our family, no home or financial security.....he discarded me after assaulting our grown up son. I'm devastated trying to mend my life.....in severe pain daily from sciatica, recently my hair is thinning, falling out ....can relate to the depression and anxiety. They take so much from us and give nothing. I'm worn out but I have to keep going. I've been crying a lot too, we are in shock and our tears are releasing the trauma and helping us to heal. It's like dealing with two different people. Outside it's Mr Wonderful and when he was with us, it was opposite, silent treatment, isolation and always walking on eggshells afraid of a rage fit. I hope you're doing better....keep moving forward day by day and keep the focus on yourself. I wish for you a happy and peaceful life and all the best for the future. Stay strong. God bless take care.
This video was the best concise description of affects of this kind of abuse. After 40yrs married to a narcissist and 5 years divorced I can say everything she says is true.
Myself and my two daughters all have long term chronic fatigue issues that never resolve. I'm convinced this is from living with constant abuse from my ex husband
The constant criticism and name calling is what I grew up with. I overcompensated by trying to be a perfect mother and perfect wife. I had post partum depression with the second child and my husband abandoned us. I’ve struggled with my confidence, and sometimes my sanity, ever since. Constantly criticizing and calling a child names should get protective services involved. Only a maniac does that to a child.
After a point there is anger and rage too becos uv put up with so much over the years. Auto immune conditions, neuropathy , brain fog just to name a few.
Saddest thing is he doesn't even know he is a narcissist. But he tricked me too, he's not all the signs. He doesn't body shame me or call me names. It's so confusing.
The memory impact of who we were or how we were at at a previous point in time. Narcissists have a tendency to topple anyone's future, whoever, however, whenever they can. Some of us just gravitate into this kinds nature of being as a trap.
My goodness, EVERY word you said is true. Understanding what I was embroiled in didn't come to light until I left after 24 years, with my sanity and health almost gone including fibromyalgia. I'm in the process of healing from diagnosed CPTSD over the past several years. I'm still learning to treat myself with compassion...which was something I RARELY saw in my marriage. Thank you for how you help us. 😊
After I left my ex, a friend pointed out that I was constantly apologizing. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I quickly realized why I was doing it, and I broke that habit.
my mother was a narcissist my father became an alcoholic, my brother and sister both died of drugs and alcohol. i went to a Psychiatrist who recognized my symptoms. i felt like i was physically drowning, after a few try’s we found the right antidepressant for me. i became very independent of my mother. on her death bed she gave me the meanest look. it hurt but now i am so much healthier mentally. physically i am getting better after 50 yrs. of migraines heart attack, stroke, many broken bones from osteoporosis i could go on, but you get the idea. in my forties i joined the Catholic Church, i am at peace. i forgive my parents they were so very sick. God bless all of you going through this.💕😊💕🙏💕✝️💕
So for your tragic upbringing. You a strong abd resilient person, who found help. God bless you 🙏 l pray 🙏 God's love and peace over the rest of your days. ❤
@@peterssss5396 thank you so much for your encouragement . Life is great with GOD, a strong marriage, a daughter and three grandkids who are getting better everyday. may the peace of Christ be with you and yours forever
God, and the Catholic church are still healing me. i also have a loving supportive husband. at one point i couldn’t stop crying, i would see a woman making chocolate chip cookies on a tv commercial, and i would cry, for my daughter who was suffering from the disease. if it weren’t for your articles i would still be wondering what was wrong. antidepressants have really helped as well. my daughter is still suffering physically, i was a single parent and because of constant migraines for fifty years! i couldn’t finish school or hold a job and was dependent on her, so my daughter also is suffering badly. i will be really trying to help her, as you have you have helped me. God bless all of you. admit that you can’t do this alone, ask Jesus to come into your life and direct you how to heal. it takes time be patient with yourselves . and except that Jesus really love you
You are spot on and the worst of the whole thing is nobody seems to know about this and expect you to function like a normal human being afterwards. They think it’s a normal breakup and think you’re being weak or choosing to be all dysfunctional and they don’t realize your brain has been damaged and you’re dealing with like every issue big time times ten all at once with little if any support or empathy. You’ve been as damaged as a person can be and still be breathing snd barely so and all you really need is a little assistance for a while staying organized and to be validated some snd for someone to listen to you snd say like wow man that’s way terrible I’m glad you are surviving. Screw that evil narc I know you’re a good person and we know you can pull through it. Like somebody who was just in a car wreck you wouldn’t tell them it’s their fault or ask them why they aren’t over it or some other invalidating thing or worse you probably wouldn’t kick them when their down or just suddenly turn your back on them. It’s amazingly fucked up at all levels and more people especially young people and doctors and therapists and judges and teachers and employers need to know and respect victims of this and support their healing. Their needs to be big legal protections and extremely harsh zero tolerance for this kind of thing. It’s worse than any domestic beating or violence could do bc physical pain only lasts so long and usually you can observe the healing and you would get support all day. Try and explain to other guys how your wife abused you and see how they react. It is a wonder more people don’t kill their narc spouses or bosses bc they almost never get justice or proper care and support. Nobody deserves this diabolical nightmare.
Anxiety every time he opened the door coming home from work, an autoimmune disease my doc said was triggered by extreme emotional distress, and migraines almost every week for years. I’ve had one migraine in 12 years since I divorced him, and recently discovered this is his personality disorder. It helps me to emotionally heal when he checks off all the boxes and confirm I wasn’t the unstable one.
I had the same thing going on knowing my ex was on his way home from work. Serious anxiety and nausea and the unknown when he walked thru the door. 27 years wasted of my life with that magician of a man.
I met a girl when I was a happy free guy. Shortly after I met her, I became less happy. On reflection I suspect she thought in her mind... "I bet I can wipe that smile off of his face." She did and I have been working to get my humor back for over a year. The worst thing she said was, "It was unfortunate meeting you!"
This describes my experience exactly..word for word. It's the most challenging and life retarding thing that has ever happened to me. The brain damage has literally caused me 3 jobs because I can't retain and perform the information and duties that I did before with ease. It's a daily struggle, and it's hard as hell to survive and recover these days for me
I have lived through the pervasive pain of everything you have talked about. I am worn out and exhausted. I just want to exhale.I am extremely depressed and suffering mind and body as you hae described. My support system has diminished as he has brain washed most of my children and friends. Saying"it won't be easy" is an understatement. Please pray for me.
I unfortunately developed a stress ulcer. I also have been experiencing the symptoms above. I've been working through it by resting, eating healthier and doing light workouts. But this past week my ulcer flared up causing me to not workout and rest more. My eating habits have been difficult to maintain but I've been forcing myself to eat. I also have a supplemental protein powder I use when I don't eat enough calories for the day. Over time I have worked on strategies to heal. But it has been a degrading journey with trying to balance myself. It's almost like once I get to a healthy point the Narc comes with the jabs.. Thank you for this video and information.
Right you are in so many ways; I believe that's because targets of the abuse (all of us) have "space" in our emotional makeup for the effects of narcissistic abuse, which allows it to live and thrive. Let's get rid of that space in our temperament. Choose not to believe their crazymaking. And we do need to distance ourselves from them ASAP, both physically and emotionally. If we can’t, just be a spectator to their abuse from an imaginary distance (in the way you process their mental illness, like a good therapist). Let's not personalize it, spending as little time around them as possible. Ultimately, we need to leave them, in my opinion. They don't care about our well being at all, no matter what they say or do; they just don't care and never will. But they can pretend to; it's not genuine though. Be strong and move on safely as soon as you can, never to see or speak to them again -- unless forced to by the courts (if married with children, for instance).
I can’t keep friends or be a friend to anyone. On the positive, I easily make aquitances. I pushing little by little. To heal from within is long and grueling. My desire to be happy, joyful and healthy is strong. Waking up from being catatonic like a zombie is taking long because my crushed self esteem which wasn’t perfect to begin with, needs a lot of work. Like I know I have to change my self talk and hoping this changes my subconscious feelings of fear of facing the world. Anxiety of doing just about anything at all. Second guess all the time. My inner dialogue is so damaged. It also takes physical energy or stamina to even do the research. I guess the adrenals were affected also. When I think back and triggers me to cry. Is many times standing alone in my house and wondering where the heck do I go for help who in the world is going to take me in with my three kids. No money and strength. Loneliest feeling in the world. Beyond just being broken hearted or betrayed. I’m ok now. Prayers to God changed few things. I still got to be stronger by myself by valuing my own self. I think God wants that for me too, he wants me to be able to feel proud of myself and for me to say I can do anything I desire.
I don’t know how to get away from the narcissist or even if I should! She drains my energy so much that I feel overwhelmed by her. I love her because she’s my daughter but I’m sick and tired of being sick and tired all the time 😢
It is so difficult when the person who drains you so much is a family member. Even when the other person is family, it is still important to focus on your well-being mentally and physically and do what you think is best for you.♥
I have depression severe anxiety attacks dealing with narcissistic individuals my father being one of them. Plus I get gaslit, treated like a doormat, belittled, made to feel not good enough. My narcissistic father and his flying monkeys love making me anxious. Feel on edge all the time & drained, have a lack of self worth or esteem anymore. Used to be confident, outgoing, energetic, loving my life until the gaslighting, gossiping behind my back, false accusations, mind games came along. Now I feel fatigued, drained, invisible, depressed, having trauma, feeling worthless, exhausted.
16 yrs and I am finally ready to break free. I just ran across this info. Our house was in constant chaos I had a post vaccine reaction. I'm sure bc of the turmoil I developed CNS demyelation, undifferentiated connective tissue disease, hashimoto's, and MS on and off table! I have suffered immensely from diseases and mental decline.
I just don’t feel alive anymore. It’s terrible. I remember what it feels like to live, to hope, to have joy…and it all seems so far out of reach…like I’ll never have any of that ever again.
That is what emotional abuse does to people - it drains their light and they lose who they were. You CAN have all of that again and hopefully you can find it again before you lose even a memory of what you used to be/have.
Yes, I can relate. As Dr. Emily said, you become a shell of yourself. I didn't know myself anymore and I describe it as my tiny flame being close to being entirely snuffed out. My malignant narcissistic spouse almost broke me. I had extreme anxiety and depression, eventually causing a more serious medical heart condition at age 37, which eventually resolved. I sought help in secret at first, taking medication and therapy. I improved within weeks, set boundaries, and pursued a divorce. But, eventually I lost custody of 3 children. My 2 teenage daughters were brainwashed (per psychologists) and chose to live with their father and believe lies he told them about me. It was the ultimate punishment to me for exposing his abusive treatment of me. All 3 children are estranged to me for 20 years now. Hang in there. ❤ Keep watching Dr. Emily's videos. She is spot on with this important information.
I relate to your comment. My husband was a victim of narcissistic abuse. And it turned into a smear campaign against us. He was completely innocent and used as collateral damage to cover up the narcs wrong doing. We have suffered for 8 months. Not a day goes by that I don’t cry. Our family just thinks we need to move on but everyday we are impacted by the abuse that took place. We are a broken family now. Once so happy. Now like a wheel with broken spokes. My husband has severe anxiety. And I have been depressed for months. It’s the hardest thing we’ve ever had to go through.
Can never relax while out supposedly to have fun., only to be proven once again-- why do I have even bother.. same thing different day.. for decades!😣😤
I’m so sorry. Just went through some of the worst narcissistic abuse and I can completely relate to this. My family were victims of a narcissist smear campaign. We’ve Been depressed for 8 months and people in our life can’t understand and think we just need to move on. But they don’t understand we are broken..
I am happy to hear it wasn't anything more serious medically and you were able to get away for your own health. That requires so much strength. I am proud of you!
@mth9267, I hear you. I had numerous physical symptoms due to the stress. The one that scared me was heart palpitations that I consulted a cardiologist for. That was the last straw for me. I sought help with therapy and medication, in secret, because it was forbidden by my spouse and in-laws. Eventually the heart palpitations resolved sometime after divorce. Also, I had pain in my tailbone (as$) that went away.
Many good points here. Not everyone thinks it’s the right thing to leave. Many believe that marriage is a covenant relationship with God🎚️not to be broken for the reason of narcissism.
Thank you for your comment. Yes, people stay in relationships that aren't good for them for many different reasons. It is important to support them no matter what choice they make.
Apparently my newest narcissist, who stalked me and got to every (former) friend and relative I had (already a very toxic situation I didn't need interference in from a stalking stranger who claimed he had romantic feelings for me when we had never dated). Bit by bit people I didn't even know started letting me know he had made me underground infamous by way of their ostracism at best, vandalism and worse most of the time. Everywhere I tried to move to live in peace was poisoned by this creep. His philosophy seems to be that if one was abused in childhood, one must "face" this thru losing their life to "community" hate and mobbing. Evil justifying evil. I am so toxic now I feel overwhelming hatred. I lost my life to someone else's obsession.
Ran away from my narcassist 2 months ago 6700 klm away. He found me and showed up at my door where im staying. I wasn't there but now hiding. I feel calling cops will only escalate things :( He is not accepting the breakup)
Ive been emotionally and mentally abused for 25 years by a step parent. It sucks because I'm the only one going through this. Other family members know what is going on but keep quiet
My collegue was a narcissist. He retired 10 years ago but I still think about his comments on my daily activities as if he is always there. How can I get him out of my mind?
Not being able to eat, very difficult to, the last few weeks, & not just to lose weight, feel sick, Very anxious, difficult to concentrate, cramp in my stonach, headache, lack of sleep & them keeping me awake with snoring & other sleep prob. Low confidence. Very depressed, & more this yr, from them & this negative place I've tried to leave for a bit over 2 & a half yrs, am soon to pack stuff away & have no where
My deep pit in the stomach ache and pain and being completely off my food for the time throughout our relationship is how I felt….he didn’t classically ‘bring me down’ …but the time we were together was wonderful….then he’d go no contact….then pop up again days later….he was a mixture of a self admitted narcissist and a relationship commitment avoider!!!
I was at the mercy of my former boss for 18 months and only left after the smear campaign brought everything to a head. Only after I left and didn't have to benon high alert anymore did I start to get sick, and I have had issues with my blood, heart, neurological system, pains all over my body and I feel like an 84 year old in the body of a 38 year old which is just depressing
Complex PSTD....mentioned this to a professional psychiatrist of my acquaintance. He denied that this was possible- needless to say I call bs on his so-called professional opinion. Very serious organ damage and brain damage also caused by this abuse. 'Losing skills' and being unable to operate normally without panic attacks, breathing difficulties etc. All the more serious when you've operated the majority of your life as a competent, intellingent person.
Thank you for this video I have residue from a narrc marriage I'm in a relationship still healing and being delivered I have learned not to blame my triggers on others but to know and set boundaries so I continue in counseling and learning what I went through can bee hard in all relationships because you don't want to go through it anymore and as some one said some don't know that they are a narrc
Hi, I have been married to a Narc for 30 years. In the last 3 years, after a failed APS case I had filed against her, I studied NPD abuse using Narcissistic Abuse videos on UA-cam, help lines/Groups and other sources. regardingFB groups. I am working to ensure I have all bases covered before I make my escape. I have become increasing successful with the Grey Rock methodology and use of my intellect to the point I knew she was a Narc. I fit the victim profile closely. I also seem to be building up my defenses, visibly causing her insecurity and fear. I am still living with my Narc and planning to leave ASAP. Is playing along with her schemes and controlling them good?
I feel like we give narcissists more power than they deserve with videos and videos full of advice/information that people never seem to take. The world also shames you for standing up for yourself, having a backbone, or walking away. Even fighting back. Like by somehow not taking shit, you lose power because we all care too much about winning with narcissists or care too much about what they actually think and how they make us look if it makes us go nuclear (if onlookers are prone to judge you based on your reaction to the narc, then they aren't your people anyway). Don't go nuclear though but for other reasons not because of a power game but because it's wrong. Really though, at the end of the day, so what? Who are they anyway if they're like this? Just get away from them if you can't live with it. You can. All it takes is a step in the opposite direction.
Yes. I have the same issues. I am slowly regaining some of the memories I have forgotten about due to the constant confusion and constant work in trying to please the narcissist I was with for close to 6 years. I now know the reason my sister can't remember a lot of stuff from our childhood due to our mother (once finding out my ex has NPD then I realized my mom has the same disorder. It was a relief to my sister for her to know it was something not wrong with her not being able to remember a lot of stuff). I hope you can regain some of the memories that you haven't forgotten but that you've just locked away due to the abuse you were receiving.
I have 50 years of narcissist husband (father in law, now passed away) i am disabled, chronic health issues, ME..chronic fatigue..facing a day is so hard..im hoping to leave very soon..wishing anyone who has lived with narcissism my very best wishes..peace.
Please consider doing a future video on the prevelance of narcissistic abuse against females within extreme religious groups in the US, specifically, but not only, (so-called) "Complimentarianism" in current Fundamentalist/Evangeliical Christianity. This is a huge, psychologically-damaging problem for women, and is under-reported, sad to say.
Nice talk...Thanks, My story...dealt with few individuals over year's, Narc's, etc... I decided to flip, script...and if... any future Narc's on my radar, " I let.. "them know" , through controlled " balanced " interpersonal communication " what, "I" am saying, " mean" and " want", like a child....with a calm smile, of course..( i,e... I figured them out ...( control freak, nonsense, etc)...they hate this...especially my, calm manner now in interactions, when they are " a bit irritated by me", .. note...." they" , sought my attention, conversely m " I" , let " them" , know the terms of acceptable dialouge...in a corgial/ human said, " way", they avoid me there after... Meet (5) Narc's daily....society's so screwed up..lbut, " I control" terms, as said...with these child like figures. A good " cold" stare, calms a " brat" child, and the adult they become/ Narc. Peace
Almost every day last two years …. And now I am in discard stage and he is silent treatment. We were to be married in April and he got me so upset gaslighting me and he walked in 3 weeks ago and said because you yelled at me I don’t love you anymore. I reminded him of his mother?? UGH And here’s the best part my hands were in the air praying because he was making me feel bananas! I knew the truth and he was insistent I was wrong!! He is a completely different man! I don’t recognize him. I met him through my church and God forgive me but I call it all a phony act. 😢 It was red flags but he’d go up to wonderful and crash with constantly picking on my appearance and commenting on my kids home car friends and the way I believed in Jesus. 😢 help me Lord this has to get better.
I have non her since she was. 12. I love her me 13 years old. But it was just abused all the time I no what you think. It's not easy to live with out them. 73 nowadays. On my own. But see her we live in the same place. Flats. Thanks😥
I've been reading online how common it is for narcs to try to get police arrested 😠. I can say regarding the situation I had regarding a female narc who split me as all bad, was nasty towards me for months and then smeared me when I called her out on it...that's what caused my anger to linger for years towards her...the fact that SHE created drama with me yet would even think of going to the police *just because I said words that bruised her narcissistic ego.* Part of me almost though "well if she's gonna do that, I should tell the police the vulgar things she posted online and her past bully behavior of others"
Found out he married a woman in Mexico, constantly catching him cheating, could never just be myself and laugh or joke he would mimic my laugh and say quit acting like a child yet he constantly made jokes and would Crack himself up. Which weren't even funny and usually making fun of people. Everything had to be about him no real conversations. Expected me to cater to him 24hrs, yell my name like I'm a child to do something for him like get him a water or turn off the fan. And when something went wrong it was my fault because I did it. Which if he did it it wouldn't be a problem how convenient. Always name calling how dumb I was "you think your smart but your really not." Led to physically hitting me. I have severe internal health problems was hospitalized for a rupture in my intestines. Depression, ptsd, anxiety, migraines, constant diarrhea. Yet I did everything for him I was just a lazy bitch. "Because he did everything for me I did not appreciate a hard working man like himself" I was just a Taker!!!" He could have any woman he wanted because woman throw themselves at him"! Women are no better they knew he was with me but odviously believed whatever made up story he was feeding them about me. But when I tried to get away break free he turned into the kind understanding, I love you so much your my rock, best friend bought me nice things made promises that he would take away one by one.
The anxiety is the worst. Living on edge waiting for something bad to happen
Hopefully you got out or get out before the mental, emotional pains manifest physically....it'll kill a person because the body becomes so incredible inflamed from the chronic stress and fear.
Yes......me too......he was terrible......got me a ring and then told me he did not want to marry......
Omg, yes. It's exhausting and draining
Don't fall in that trap brother
We all create our own reality
This is true because when something bad happens it is what will feed the narcissists to worsen their abuse to finally destroy you.
Not only Destroys but also ruins you emotionally, physically & ruins your life .
Agreed
@@ritakunnunmal4226 it doesn’t have too, though even after my parents being gone now twenty years, my daughter still answers the phone with:
is everything okay? during those days we never new if my brother or sister were still alive and every time we would get a call from family, that is how we would answer.
what you need to do, i promise if you do this sincerely it will free you and give you a new life. first you admit that this situation is driving you crazy, that you are powerless over it and you can’t take it any more! then ask Jesus, who has been knocking on the door of your heart, to come in and take over. then go to church on a regular basis, find a group, a 12 step group. the 12 steps works for every problem. i choose the Catholic church.
they have mass everyday. there are a lot of broken people there, but didn’t Jesus say i ‘m not here for the healthy but for the sick. Keep going back it works! but it takes time. be patient with yourself. Get to know Mary, she was Jesus’s mama and she wants to be our spiritual mother too.
there are Catholic radio and tv stations that i listen to in the day time and at night that lift my spirit and i am never alone. God Bless you,
You will soon feel better then you ever have before 💕🙏💕😊💕
This is true. And people just think you need to move forward but you are broken. And they can’t understand that.
@@Lennie6357 hi Lennie,
thank you for affirming me. if you have been in any 12 step program, you know forgiveness has different layers, like an onion. Just when i think i have forgiven my parents an old memory pops up and i have to work through that one.
one of the most important things i have learned, i learned from my daughter. how important a sense of humor is!!! being able to laugh at ourselves and others give us so much relief 😅 God bless you on the road to healing 💕🙏💕😊💕
constantly on the defensive. I am becoming someone I do not know and do not like.
You get punished when you stand up for yourself.
That is for sure! At least with me when i do stand up for myself it makes things worse for me. Then he does more abuse. I am damned if I do and damned if I don't. They can not take any responsibility for their actions and blaming you for everything and anything even though they are the one at fault.
@@kathyhubel6794 - Plan how to leave. Don’t talk to anyone about it. Then do it.
All narcissists should be traced...Children should be protected from narcissistic parents or guardians...
I strongly agree i was born into narcisstic parents home. I grew up with them also, the amount of chronic stress and anxiety and worry is so dangerous. A child can have health problems as young as 13 from narcisstic parents. Narc parents are the worse because you cannot choose your parents you share an unwanted connection with them. Lifelong blood contract. At least you can choose spouses. You can choose to become a parent but you cannot choose your parents. Tough pill to swallow.
Stomach Aches ...
Headaches...
HEARTACHE
My narcissistic mother makes me physically ill. I have continued illnesses
Same here for me. I get muscle aches from being around my narcissistic mom, and I almost got cancer from being around her.
My mother, now deceased was a narcissist. Her abuse as well as my father's domestic violence resulted me into having a mental breakdown resulting in me having to go for inpatient care at a mental hospital for severe anxiety and depression. Then I had to go for long term outpatient care. My doctor said it best. He said "there is nothing wrong with you, you're problem is that you are living with a toxic poison in your life." After my parents died, my life got better.
No child should have to suffer the way my siblings and I did. These people are toxic as hell. I recovered from depression and am now focusing on my life and living my dreams. I sing in my church choir and am taking professional vocal lessons. I'm not living my life as the narcissist's victim. That's all behind me. I'm finally free from this.
Life is great 😊
@@angelamwatts my life is so much better since they are gone! i am working on forgiveness. they were both sick, some are sicker then others, so i pray for them both. i hope the prayers help them, they are helping me one day at a time.
❤
After finally breaking free of a 25yr marriage and her cult like family I was trying to get back to doing things I liked. The weird part was how it was a real effort to go and do anything. It was like I had to push myself hard to make that first step to do something I loved, like I had an invisible force field trying to hold me back, stop me.
Still kind of battle with this. It feels like you don't have the right to do these things which make you happy.
I think any of us that wake up to narcissists soon discover that we have been surrounded by them our entire lives beginning with either one or both parents.
Great video.
Peace!
I know exactly what you mean bro. My wife's family were like flying monkeys and my wife turned from being a covert narcissist into an full on rage overt narcissist, once I started cutting her supply and I filed for a divorce (19yrs married). I'm now remembering my old original self and it's like meeting a stranger for the 1st time. I sing and laugh and I'm more relaxed and confident in myself again. So many years of sad loss but thank God I got help and found hope.😊
I grew up in a narcissistic household. By the time I was in high school I realized that my father needed others to boss around to feel powerful. Some become narcissists if they grow up in that environment, and some become people pleasers. I'm fortunate to have empathy intact. Setting boundaries and saying no is something I have trouble with but I'm getting better. I have stopped accepting the blame when others try to dump it on me. If I have an issue I'll calmly bring it up and see how the other person responds. That determines how the relationship moves on from that point. I put my faith in actions, not words.
I find it VERY difficult to accept there are people in this world who go out of their way to harm others and refuse to acknowledge their hurtful actions. I'm not sure I'll ever be able to wrap my head around that one. It makes no sense to me.
your answers with God he created good and evil
@@sue1657GOD didn't create evil. Others created by going AGAINST the tenants of love. BIG difference ❤. Free choice remember.
@tmo.48, God definitely created evil. He created Satan. Also, he created others that he commanded them to do evil things. The god portrayed in the bible is a terrifying, horrible, immoral monster who absolutely disregards human life. He killed millions of people, including babies.
I have anxiety, stress,depression, illnesses, sadness, not worthy😢
Seek professional help! You’re WORTHY OF A JOYFILLED LIFE
Get out!!!!!! Your beautiful
4 year relationship with a Narc. Caught him cheating with a woman he had been with behind my back… he had been with her 8 years. I’ve been verbally abused, emotionally abused, and physically. No more. Trying to comprehend this all. On disability for a few weeks because of this all. Depression, anxiety, can’t eat or sleep. This was very helpful information. Praying for you all!
A cruel lesson on .... What ppl to avoid. All the best going forward . 🌺🙏✨
A cruel lesson on .... What ppl to avoid. All the best going forward . 🌺🙏✨
That's terrible. Sick what they did to you :( :( I'm so glad that you're away from them. It will be difficult to feel better but you will one day. Peace & lots of love to you
Everything your saying is spot on!
Ill add another dimension. When divorcing a narcissist, they throw up accusations of abuse. Mine told the judge I was dangerous because:"He's in the Marine Corps and has access to MACHINE GUNS.And when we argue he says things that hurt my feelings."
And the judge granted her TRO, which messed up my career to the point, my command told me I should get out. Get my divorce, then come back.
The stress of having to find a new job, place to live, and save enough money to not only hire divorce lawyer but defend myself from her accusations of the tro.
Add to the fact, I didn't see our child from age 1 to age 3-1/2. He didn't know who I was. But, I still had to pay child support.?? Lawyers took their time, padded their bills. In the end, I actually got custody.
29 year marriage to a CN has caused depression, dependency, recently hair loss, severe anxiety. In process of separation but still live together i am still afraid to do anything without him because it is engrained in me to feel guilty like I am doing something wrong. I cry all the time, and feel EXTREMELY lonely.
7 yr here. got divorced he is in my house. Bought an RV. everything is my fault. Blame. etc. he will never apoligize. If i am around him I now have my phone on audio record if ever around him. I record his outbursts. Not sure why but Its recorded for now
Fibromyalgia hits hard. i het flare ups. I stay involved in community have home group vidit for my politics. he disappears and tho we share same political beliefs he wont stay for our home meetings potluck. Those who show up I consider my real family . He is Jeckyl n Hyde personality. all recorded. I put my phone on audio record in the meantime just for future 'spite'?
feel better. Focus on you. I get what ur going thru.
I hope things are looking up for you hun x
My hair started thinning also.
Out of 36 year relationship, (32 married), 8 months now. Destroyed our family, no home or financial security.....he discarded me after assaulting our grown up son. I'm devastated trying to mend my life.....in severe pain daily from sciatica, recently my hair is thinning, falling out ....can relate to the depression and anxiety. They take so much from us and give nothing. I'm worn out but I have to keep going. I've been crying a lot too, we are in shock and our tears are releasing the trauma and helping us to heal. It's like dealing with two different people. Outside it's Mr Wonderful and when he was with us, it was opposite, silent treatment, isolation and always walking on eggshells afraid of a rage fit. I hope you're doing better....keep moving forward day by day and keep the focus on yourself. I wish for you a happy and peaceful life and all the best for the future. Stay strong. God bless take care.
This video was the best concise description of affects of this kind of abuse. After 40yrs married to a narcissist and 5 years divorced I can say everything she says is true.
Thank you! 🙂 Happy to hear it was helpful!
Myself and my two daughters all have long term chronic fatigue issues that never resolve. I'm convinced this is from living with constant abuse from my ex husband
The constant criticism and name calling is what I grew up with. I overcompensated by trying to be a perfect mother and perfect wife. I had post partum depression with the second child and my husband abandoned us. I’ve struggled with my confidence, and sometimes my sanity, ever since. Constantly criticizing and calling a child names should get protective services involved. Only a maniac does that to a child.
After a point there is anger and rage too becos uv put up with so much over the years. Auto immune conditions, neuropathy , brain fog just to name a few.
everything you said here is so true. I have been married twice and both men are narcissists. they should teach this in our schools.
Saddest thing is he doesn't even know he is a narcissist. But he tricked me too, he's not all the signs. He doesn't body shame me or call me names. It's so confusing.
That is different and can be confusing
The memory impact of who we were or how we were at at a previous point in time.
Narcissists have a tendency to topple anyone's future, whoever, however, whenever they can.
Some of us just gravitate into this kinds nature of being as a trap.
Then there are those awfully kind people (paths collide 🤞) who make matters concerned to us (empathetically/realistically) a cinche. ✌
My goodness, EVERY word you said is true. Understanding what I was embroiled in didn't come to light until I left after 24 years, with my sanity and health almost gone including fibromyalgia. I'm in the process of healing from diagnosed CPTSD over the past several years. I'm still learning to treat myself with compassion...which was something I RARELY saw in my marriage. Thank you for how you help us. 😊
After I left my ex, a friend pointed out that I was constantly apologizing. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I quickly realized why I was doing it, and I broke that habit.
I have that trouble too.
my mother was a narcissist my father became an alcoholic, my brother and sister both died of drugs and alcohol. i went to a Psychiatrist who recognized my symptoms. i felt like i was physically drowning, after a few try’s we found the right antidepressant for me. i became very independent of my mother. on her death bed she gave me the meanest look. it hurt but now i am so much healthier mentally. physically i am getting
better after 50 yrs. of migraines heart attack, stroke, many broken bones from osteoporosis i could go on, but you get the idea. in my forties i joined the Catholic Church, i am at peace. i forgive my parents they were so very sick. God bless all of you going through this.💕😊💕🙏💕✝️💕
Am so sorry. I share the many broken bones from osteoporosis, it’s a nasty disease
So for your tragic upbringing. You a strong abd resilient person, who found help. God bless you 🙏 l pray 🙏 God's love and peace over the rest of your days. ❤
@@peterssss5396 thank you so much for your encouragement . Life is great with GOD, a strong marriage, a daughter and three grandkids who are getting better everyday. may the peace of Christ be with you and yours forever
God, and the Catholic church are still healing me. i also have a loving supportive husband. at one point i couldn’t stop crying, i would see a woman making chocolate chip cookies on a tv commercial, and i would cry, for my daughter who was suffering from the disease. if it weren’t for your articles i would still be wondering what was wrong. antidepressants have really helped as well. my daughter is still suffering physically, i was a single parent and because of constant migraines for fifty years! i couldn’t finish school or hold a job and was dependent on her, so my daughter also is suffering badly. i will be
really trying to help her, as you have you have helped me. God bless all of you. admit that you can’t do this alone, ask Jesus to come into your life and direct you how to heal. it takes time be patient with yourselves . and except that Jesus really love you
Depression, panic attack, anxiety. A year after my divorce I learned I had stage 4 NHL.
I am so sorry, I hope you recover.
You are spot on and the worst of the whole thing is nobody seems to know about this and expect you to function like a normal human being afterwards. They think it’s a normal breakup and think you’re being weak or choosing to be all dysfunctional and they don’t realize your brain has been damaged and you’re dealing with like every issue big time times ten all at once with little if any support or empathy. You’ve been as damaged as a person can be and still be breathing snd barely so and all you really need is a little assistance for a while staying organized and to be validated some snd for someone to listen to you snd say like wow man that’s way terrible I’m glad you are surviving. Screw that evil narc I know you’re a good person and we know you can pull through it. Like somebody who was just in a car wreck you wouldn’t tell them it’s their fault or ask them why they aren’t over it or some other invalidating thing or worse you probably wouldn’t kick them when their down or just suddenly turn your back on them. It’s amazingly fucked up at all levels and more people especially young people and doctors and therapists and judges and teachers and employers need to know and respect victims of this and support their healing. Their needs to be big legal protections and extremely harsh zero tolerance for this kind of thing. It’s worse than any domestic beating or violence could do bc physical pain only lasts so long and usually you can observe the healing and you would get support all day. Try and explain to other guys how your wife abused you and see how they react. It is a wonder more people don’t kill their narc spouses or bosses bc they almost never get justice or proper care and support. Nobody deserves this diabolical nightmare.
I'm currently living with that demon and I want to get out!
Set a date to leave and never look back.
Anxiety every time he opened the door coming home from work, an autoimmune disease my doc said was triggered by extreme emotional distress, and migraines almost every week for years. I’ve had one migraine in 12 years since I divorced him, and recently discovered this is his personality disorder. It helps me to emotionally heal when he checks off all the boxes and confirm I wasn’t the unstable one.
Thank you for sharing. I am sure your experiences will help someone else feel less alone in their own experiences.
I had the same thing going on knowing my ex was on his way home from work. Serious anxiety and nausea and the unknown when he walked thru the door. 27 years wasted of my life with that magician of a man.
Like my vietnam vet dad coming home, in the 70's. We kids would hide behind walls to keep away from him. Headaches all the time back then,
I met a girl when I was a happy free guy. Shortly after I met her, I became less happy. On reflection I suspect she thought in her mind... "I bet I can wipe that smile off of his face." She did and I have been working to get my humor back for over a year. The worst thing she said was, "It was unfortunate meeting you!"
I experience muscle weakness whenever he's anywhere near so it becomes extremely hard to walk and function normally
This describes my experience exactly..word for word. It's the most challenging and life retarding thing that has ever happened to me. The brain damage has literally caused me 3 jobs because I can't retain and perform the information and duties that I did before with ease. It's a daily struggle, and it's hard as hell to survive and recover these days for me
I have lived through the pervasive pain of everything you have talked about. I am worn out and exhausted. I just want to exhale.I am extremely depressed and suffering mind and body as you hae described. My support system has diminished as he has brain washed most of my children and friends. Saying"it won't be easy" is an understatement. Please pray for me.
It will be difficult but you are learning more about what you went through and that will make you stronger!
I've lived with my husband who is a narcissist and everything she said is my life
I unfortunately developed a stress ulcer. I also have been experiencing the symptoms above. I've been working through it by resting, eating healthier and doing light workouts. But this past week my ulcer flared up causing me to not workout and rest more. My eating habits have been difficult to maintain but I've been forcing myself to eat. I also have a supplemental protein powder I use when I don't eat enough calories for the day. Over time I have worked on strategies to heal. But it has been a degrading journey with trying to balance myself. It's almost like once I get to a healthy point the Narc comes with the jabs.. Thank you for this video and information.
I’ve lived 33 years with a narcissist and everything she says is true.
Right you are in so many ways; I believe that's because targets of the abuse (all of us) have "space" in our emotional makeup for the effects of narcissistic abuse, which allows it to live and thrive. Let's get rid of that space in our temperament. Choose not to believe their crazymaking. And we do need to distance ourselves from them ASAP, both physically and emotionally. If we can’t, just be a spectator to their abuse from an imaginary distance (in the way you process their mental illness, like a good therapist). Let's not personalize it, spending as little time around them as possible. Ultimately, we need to leave them, in my opinion. They don't care about our well being at all, no matter what they say or do; they just don't care and never will. But they can pretend to; it's not genuine though. Be strong and move on safely as soon as you can, never to see or speak to them again -- unless forced to by the courts (if married with children, for instance).
Thank you for sharing. 🤗
@@DrEmilyMayfield My pleasure, and thank you for uploading this very informative content.
I can’t keep friends or be a friend to anyone. On the positive, I easily make aquitances. I pushing little by little. To heal from within is long and grueling. My desire to be happy, joyful and healthy is strong. Waking up from being catatonic like a zombie is taking long because my crushed self esteem which wasn’t perfect to begin with, needs a lot of work. Like I know I have to change my self talk and hoping this changes my subconscious feelings of fear of facing the world. Anxiety of doing just about anything at all. Second guess all the time. My inner dialogue is so damaged. It also takes physical energy or stamina to even do the research. I guess the adrenals were affected also. When I think back and triggers me to cry. Is many times standing alone in my house and wondering where the heck do I go for help who in the world is going to take me in with my three kids. No money and strength. Loneliest feeling in the world. Beyond just being broken hearted or betrayed. I’m ok now. Prayers to God changed few things. I still got to be stronger by myself by valuing my own self. I think God wants that for me too, he wants me to be able to feel proud of myself and for me to say I can do anything I desire.
I don’t know how to get away from the narcissist or even if I should! She drains my energy so much that I feel overwhelmed by her. I love her because she’s my daughter but I’m sick and tired of being sick and tired all the time 😢
It is so difficult when the person who drains you so much is a family member. Even when the other person is family, it is still important to focus on your well-being mentally and physically and do what you think is best for you.♥
I have depression severe anxiety attacks dealing with narcissistic individuals my father being one of them. Plus I get gaslit, treated like a doormat, belittled, made to feel not good enough. My narcissistic father and his flying monkeys love making me anxious. Feel on edge all the time & drained, have a lack of self worth or esteem anymore. Used to be confident, outgoing, energetic, loving my life until the gaslighting, gossiping behind my back, false accusations, mind games came along. Now I feel fatigued, drained, invisible, depressed, having trauma, feeling worthless, exhausted.
16 yrs and I am finally ready to break free. I just ran across this info. Our house was in constant chaos I had a post vaccine reaction. I'm sure bc of the turmoil I developed CNS demyelation, undifferentiated connective tissue disease, hashimoto's, and MS on and off table! I have suffered immensely from diseases and mental decline.
Zzz😊❤😮
You've explained things as they really are. Well done yo!
The covered type is disgusting. Goes so under the skin.
I just don’t feel alive anymore. It’s terrible. I remember what it feels like to live, to hope, to have joy…and it all seems so far out of reach…like I’ll never have any of that ever again.
That is what emotional abuse does to people - it drains their light and they lose who they were. You CAN have all of that again and hopefully you can find it again before you lose even a memory of what you used to be/have.
@@DrEmilyMayfield thank you 🙏
Yes, I can relate. As Dr. Emily said, you become a shell of yourself. I didn't know myself anymore and I describe it as my tiny flame being close to being entirely snuffed out. My malignant narcissistic spouse almost broke me. I had extreme anxiety and depression, eventually causing a more serious medical heart condition at age 37, which eventually resolved. I sought help in secret at first, taking medication and therapy. I improved within weeks, set boundaries, and pursued a divorce. But, eventually I lost custody of 3 children. My 2 teenage daughters were brainwashed (per psychologists) and chose to live with their father and believe lies he told them about me. It was the ultimate punishment to me for exposing his abusive treatment of me. All 3 children are estranged to me for 20 years now.
Hang in there. ❤ Keep watching Dr. Emily's videos. She is spot on with this important information.
I relate to your comment. My husband was a victim of narcissistic abuse. And it turned into a smear campaign against us. He was completely innocent and used as collateral damage to cover up the narcs wrong doing. We have suffered for 8 months. Not a day goes by that I don’t cry. Our family just thinks we need to move on but everyday we are impacted by the abuse that took place. We are a broken family now. Once so happy. Now like a wheel with broken spokes. My husband has severe anxiety. And I have been depressed for months. It’s the hardest thing we’ve ever had to go through.
Can never relax while out supposedly to have fun., only to be proven once again-- why do I have even bother.. same thing different day.. for decades!😣😤
I’m severely depressed.
I hope your ok now
I’m so sorry. Just went through some of the worst narcissistic abuse and I can completely relate to this. My family were victims of a narcissist smear campaign. We’ve Been depressed for 8 months and people in our life can’t understand and think we just need to move on. But they don’t understand we are broken..
Several EKGs,and heart specialiits and suddenly it all went away after I got away.
I am happy to hear it wasn't anything more serious medically and you were able to get away for your own health. That requires so much strength. I am proud of you!
@mth9267, I hear you. I had numerous physical symptoms due to the stress. The one that scared me was heart palpitations that I consulted a cardiologist for. That was the last straw for me. I sought help with therapy and medication, in secret, because it was forbidden by my spouse and in-laws. Eventually the heart palpitations resolved sometime after divorce. Also, I had pain in my tailbone (as$) that went away.
Many good points here. Not everyone thinks it’s the right thing to leave. Many believe that marriage is a covenant relationship with God🎚️not to be broken for the reason of narcissism.
Thank you for your comment. Yes, people stay in relationships that aren't good for them for many different reasons. It is important to support them no matter what choice they make.
@@DrEmilyMayfield THANK YOU‼️
All true! Thank you, God with us all healing & suffering ❤️🤘✝️
Highs and lows in my emotions
Apparently my newest narcissist, who stalked me and got to every (former) friend and relative I had (already a very toxic situation I didn't need interference in from a stalking stranger who claimed he had romantic feelings for me when we had never dated). Bit by bit people I didn't even know started letting me know he had made me underground infamous by way of their ostracism at best, vandalism and worse most of the time. Everywhere I tried to move to live in peace was poisoned by this creep. His philosophy seems to be that if one was abused in childhood, one must "face" this thru losing their life to "community" hate and mobbing.
Evil justifying evil. I am so toxic now I feel overwhelming hatred. I lost my life to someone else's obsession.
Dont loose hope my dear, behind the clouds the sunshine always shine
Ran away from my narcassist 2 months ago 6700 klm away. He found me and showed up at my door where im staying. I wasn't there but now hiding. I feel calling cops will only escalate things :( He is not accepting the breakup)
Yes
Your channel is really really good
I'm terrified of hurting people and don't know how to not hurt people. So I just stay alone most of the time.
Jesus is the answear, ask Him, and He will show you step by step how to move in this. god bless you
This rang true for me. Had to take a week off of lifting weights from physical pain that had no physical reason to be there.
Ive been emotionally and mentally abused for 25 years by a step parent. It sucks because I'm the only one going through this. Other family members know what is going on but keep quiet
Leave. Don’t look back. Forgive and learn.
low self esteem and always second guessing myself.
They are demonic. Leave. Run.
They will also excuse you of being the narcissistic one
My collegue was a narcissist. He retired 10 years ago but I still think about his comments on my daily activities as if he is always there. How can I get him out of my mind?
I sometimes don’t see my self or miss myself and don’t recognise who I am anymore because of over ten years of narcissist abuse
I used to pull my hair a lot and from am healed i stopped.
Not being able to eat, very difficult to, the last few weeks, & not just to lose weight, feel sick, Very anxious, difficult to concentrate, cramp in my stonach, headache, lack of sleep & them keeping me awake with snoring & other sleep prob. Low confidence. Very depressed, & more this yr, from them & this negative place I've tried to leave for a bit over 2 & a half yrs, am soon to pack stuff away & have no where
My deep pit in the stomach ache and pain and being completely off my food for the time throughout our relationship is how I felt….he didn’t classically ‘bring me down’ …but the time we were together was wonderful….then he’d go no contact….then pop up again days later….he was a mixture of a self admitted narcissist and a relationship commitment avoider!!!
I was at the mercy of my former boss for 18 months and only left after the smear campaign brought everything to a head. Only after I left and didn't have to benon high alert anymore did I start to get sick, and I have had issues with my blood, heart, neurological system, pains all over my body and I feel like an 84 year old in the body of a 38 year old which is just depressing
PTSD
Complex PSTD....mentioned this to a professional psychiatrist of my acquaintance. He denied that this was possible- needless to say I call bs on his so-called professional opinion. Very serious organ damage and brain damage also caused by this abuse. 'Losing skills' and being unable to operate normally without panic attacks, breathing difficulties etc. All the more serious when you've operated the majority of your life as a competent, intellingent person.
Perfect description 🎯
Thank you!
Spot on with my experience. Thanks!
You are welcome!
Thank you for this video I have residue from a narrc marriage I'm in a relationship still healing and being delivered I have learned not to blame my triggers on others but to know and set boundaries so I continue in counseling and learning what I went through can bee hard in all relationships because you don't want to go through it anymore and as some one said some don't know that they are a narrc
I experienced all aspects of this video😢
I am happy to see it was helpful but sad to hear you are able to relate to the information. 😞
Hi, I have been married to a Narc for 30 years. In the last 3 years, after a failed APS case I had filed against her, I studied NPD abuse using Narcissistic Abuse videos on UA-cam, help lines/Groups and other sources. regardingFB groups.
I am working to ensure I have all bases covered before I make my escape.
I have become increasing successful with the Grey Rock methodology and use of my intellect to the point I knew she was a Narc.
I fit the victim profile closely. I also seem to be building up my defenses, visibly causing her insecurity and fear.
I am still living with my Narc and planning to leave ASAP. Is playing along with her schemes and controlling them good?
Well said....
My neighbor is a toxic narcissist that constantly belittles me.
Stay away from them.
Thank you so much!
I feel like we give narcissists more power than they deserve with videos and videos full of advice/information that people never seem to take. The world also shames you for standing up for yourself, having a backbone, or walking away. Even fighting back. Like by somehow not taking shit, you lose power because we all care too much about winning with narcissists or care too much about what they actually think and how they make us look if it makes us go nuclear (if onlookers are prone to judge you based on your reaction to the narc, then they aren't your people anyway). Don't go nuclear though but for other reasons not because of a power game but because it's wrong. Really though, at the end of the day, so what? Who are they anyway if they're like this? Just get away from them if you can't live with it. You can. All it takes is a step in the opposite direction.
I have lost years of my memories- can chronic narcissistic abuse make you feel like you have Alzheimer’s ?
Yes. I have the same issues. I am slowly regaining some of the memories I have forgotten about due to the constant confusion and constant work in trying to please the narcissist I was with for close to 6 years. I now know the reason my sister can't remember a lot of stuff from our childhood due to our mother (once finding out my ex has NPD then I realized my mom has the same disorder. It was a relief to my sister for her to know it was something not wrong with her not being able to remember a lot of stuff). I hope you can regain some of the memories that you haven't forgotten but that you've just locked away due to the abuse you were receiving.
Thank you Kevin@@kevinmcclernan3166
Yessssss
This is a brilliant video 😅 Thank u so much dear ❤❤❤
PEOPLE get SICK and can't leave because they can't even walk after awhile
I have 50 years of narcissist husband (father in law, now passed away) i am disabled, chronic health issues, ME..chronic fatigue..facing a day is so hard..im hoping to leave very soon..wishing anyone who has lived with narcissism my very best wishes..peace.
Thank you for sharing kind words for others.
Please consider doing a future video on the prevelance of narcissistic abuse against females within extreme religious groups in the US, specifically, but not only, (so-called) "Complimentarianism" in current Fundamentalist/Evangeliical Christianity. This is a huge, psychologically-damaging problem for women, and is under-reported, sad to say.
Nice talk...Thanks, My story...dealt with few individuals over year's, Narc's, etc... I decided to flip, script...and if... any future Narc's on my radar, " I let.. "them know" , through controlled " balanced " interpersonal communication " what, "I" am saying, " mean" and " want", like a child....with a calm smile, of course..( i,e... I figured them out ...( control freak, nonsense, etc)...they hate this...especially my, calm manner now in interactions, when they are " a bit irritated by me", .. note...." they" , sought my attention, conversely m " I" , let " them" , know the terms of acceptable dialouge...in a corgial/ human said, " way", they avoid me there after... Meet (5) Narc's daily....society's so screwed up..lbut, " I control" terms, as said...with these child like figures. A good " cold" stare, calms a " brat" child, and the adult they become/ Narc. Peace
merci !!!!!!!!!
Almost every day last two years …. And now I am in discard stage and he is silent treatment. We were to be married in April and he got me so upset gaslighting me and he walked in 3 weeks ago and said because you yelled at me I don’t love you anymore. I reminded him of his mother?? UGH And here’s the best part my hands were in the air praying because he was making me feel bananas! I knew the truth and he was insistent I was wrong!! He is a completely different man! I don’t recognize him. I met him through my church and God forgive me but I call it all a phony act. 😢 It was red flags but he’d go up to wonderful and crash with constantly picking on my appearance and commenting on my kids home car friends and the way I believed in Jesus. 😢 help me Lord this has to get better.
That why you have to get away and total no contact
4:02 - He isolated me !from everyone thur gaslighting , he finally left and thats when the military revenge tactical attacks began ........
Totally agree
Spot on!
Does anyone ever mention that they do not like to cooperate or collaborate?
I have non her since she was. 12. I love her me 13 years old. But it was just abused all the time I no what you think. It's not easy to live with out them. 73 nowadays. On my own. But see her we live in the same place. Flats. Thanks😥
For the males caught , listen to this person and do your research . Thankyou
I've been reading online how common it is for narcs to try to get police arrested 😠.
I can say regarding the situation I had regarding a female narc who split me as all bad, was nasty towards me for months and then smeared me when I called her out on it...that's what caused my anger to linger for years towards her...the fact that SHE created drama with me yet would even think of going to the police *just because I said words that bruised her narcissistic ego.*
Part of me almost though "well if she's gonna do that, I should tell the police the vulgar things she posted online and her past bully behavior of others"
Can hair loss also be a symptom?
Yes, hair loss can be a symptom of stress.
100 percent
Yes
PTSD
Why is the "narcisist" always the "mother" or a partner??
Sounds like the monster i live with
Found out he married a woman in Mexico, constantly catching him cheating, could never just be myself and laugh or joke he would mimic my laugh and say quit acting like a child yet he constantly made jokes and would Crack himself up. Which weren't even funny and usually making fun of people. Everything had to be about him no real conversations. Expected me to cater to him 24hrs, yell my name like I'm a child to do something for him like get him a water or turn off the fan. And when something went wrong it was my fault because I did it. Which if he did it it wouldn't be a problem how convenient. Always name calling how dumb I was "you think your smart but your really not." Led to physically hitting me. I have severe internal health problems was hospitalized for a rupture in my intestines. Depression, ptsd, anxiety, migraines, constant diarrhea. Yet I did everything for him I was just a lazy bitch. "Because he did everything for me I did not appreciate a hard working man like himself" I was just a Taker!!!" He could have any woman he wanted because woman throw themselves at him"! Women are no better they knew he was with me but odviously believed whatever made up story he was feeding them about me. But when I tried to get away break free he turned into the kind understanding, I love you so much your my rock, best friend bought me nice things made promises that he would take away one by one.
Did he wear a pair of house shoes? where are they?
im loosing my hair and i think he was cutting it in my sleep.