5 Things God is Doing for Good when You are in a Toxic Relationship
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- Опубліковано 11 чер 2024
- Why God Allows a Toxic Relationship: 5 Things He Does for Good when You are in a Toxic Relationship
Are you in a toxic relationship? It is never God’s plan to keep you in a toxic relationship, and God does not condone toxic behavior.
It is becoming more and more common for people to find themselves in toxic environments or toxic relationships. You might be in that situation right now. I just want to say to you that toxicity is not your destiny.
Sometimes we may be in a toxic relationship or environment because our wrong choices led us there. There may be toxic people in your family, and you can't just cut out those relationships.
Or maybe God led you into a relationship or environment that started off well but then turned toxic over time.
I created this video because I don't want you to lose heart if you are in a situation like that. There are always gems and blessings that can come forth from a situation like that or seasons like that, no matter how difficult or devastating.
This video is to help you glean those treasures while you are in that difficult trial. I’ll be discussing the ways that God uses toxic relationships for good. He is a God who can take the negative things in our life and turn them around for good.
Here is the link to Part 1 of this video called "5 Red Flags that You Are in a Toxic Relationship"
• 5 Red Flags that You a...
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WHO AM I?
It seems my whole life has prepared me to do the work I am so passionate about today. Let’s just say I had to swim in narcissistic waters for many years, in workplace scenarios, in my previous faith as a Muslim, in friendships, and even in the church. God truly doesn’t waste anything. Each and every experience and all the studies I have done help me in my passion to set people free from the bondage and oppression of narcissistic relationships, to help survivors of such pain regain their authentic selves and their hope in God’s good plans for them, and to re-educate the church around toxic leadership.
#healingfromnarcissisticabuse #biblicalperspectivenarcissism #toxicity #toxicperson #toxicrelationship #toxicsigns #navigatingtoxicrelationships #unhealthyrelationships #manipulation #healingtoxicity #churchhurts #healingfromnarcissisticabuse #biblicalperspectiveontoxicity #bibleandtoxicrelationship #bibleandtoxicity #ToxicRelationships #NarcissisticAbuse #AbusiveRelationships #HealingAfterAbuse #Empowerment #SpiritualHealing #BiblicalWisdom #SurvivingToxicity #HealthyRelationships #BreakingFree #EmotionalHealing #ToxicPeople #NarcissisticRecovery #BoundariesMatter #FindingStrength #EmotionalWellbeing #BreakingChains #narcissism #toxicity #toxicperson #toxicrelationship #toxicsigns #navigatingtoxicrelationships #unhealthyrelationships #manipulation #biblicalperspectiveontoxicity #bibleandtoxicrelationship #bibleandtoxicity #healingtoxicity
I always thought that there was some good in everyone, even toxic people. Boy was I wrong! I stayed in a marriage filled with toxicity for 29 years. It almost drove me to my demise. I learned a lot about myself and here are 3 things: 1) I'm too trusting and believe the best about others. 2) I ignored thousands of red flags and forgave too quickly and 3) Everyone does not have a pure heart and their intentions are not always obvious (pay attention to behaviors). I am grateful to be out from under the demonic influence of a person that I once called my husband. The lessons that I learned about myself were excruiatingly difficult to acknowledge. I am still healing and relying on God to complete the work he began in me. This is not for the faint or the weak...I wanted to quit thousands of times but my faith somehow pulled me back up to fight.
❤️"When God is happy with you, He gives you a trial."❤️
Amen
Excellent video! I had been single for a really long time and wasn't really desiring a mate. I often hear God's voice so when I was lying in bed one morning, I heard God say, "I have someone for you" I was really taken aback because I wasn't looking for a partner. I told God I wasn't looking for anyone and he just kept repeating the same thing, "I have someone for you". About a month later, I ran into an acquaintance I had known from a couple of years prior. We started chatting and soon made plans to hang out. And after spending a couple of months hanging out and doing fun things together, I really felt like he was the "someone" God told me he had for me. The new guy introduced me to his friends who also seemed to really care about and love me. I felt like I finally had the "family" I had lacked growing up. I was excited to finally feel valued and loved by these new people. Long story short, my boyfriend, and two of his friends were sociopaths who only sought to destroy me and play games with my mind and heart. My boyfriend was cheating on me and his friends were helping him cover it up. The embarrassment and betrayal was horrible. I was in so much pain and anguish when I learned of their sick plans against me and I cried out to God to deliver me. He revealed my deep insecurity and abandonment issues from childhood that I need to work on before he blesses me so abundantly. I'm being taken through this horrible situation because I need to discern better, put up boundaries and not trust everyone who smiles at me. I'm thankful I didn't marry him or have a child with him like we planned. And I know God is just preparing me for the man who is truly my someone!
Same thing happen to me! Read the gospels in the Bible it will really help with your identity in Christ and help you discern the fruit of a person. God Bless you
My mom was so Toxic. I love that God is my parent. Thank you ! ❤️🌹👍🏻🙏🏻😊
I love that God is my parent, too!😊🙏
Thank You 20 years with a narccist i thought if i love him he will change the closer i get my relationship with god he will change him but the holy spirit has told me it is time to break the strong hold of the narccist and heal
I’d love to see you do a video on scripture and divorce. I divorced a narcissist after 22 years, and I struggled so much at the time to reconcile my action (which felt like running out of a burning forest) with scripture. After much prayer and study, I felt like I got sufficient answers... BUT... I’ve been so frustrated at the church’s lack of addressing abuse (and particularly this type of abuse). Just “stick it out and pray more” was eventually going to kill me in a very literal way. I know many Christians suffering in abusive marriages because they believe God would not allow them to leave. I’m a few years out and remarried to a wonderful Christian man.... and I STILL at times wrestle with guilt.
Thank you so much for your channel... what a refreshing perspective! ❤️
Janis, thank you for sharing. This is such an important and needed subject. I have taken note!
Janis: I have the same story but stayed 35 years. My soul was crushed to powder by the covert abuse. No one understood why I had to flee except God. So many people cut me off. This kind of abuse is worse than physical abuse because you can't detect it right away and as Christian women we keep gaslighting ourselves into staying. I remind myself that God is my vindication. Only in hindsight did I see the grooming, the love-bombing and the beginning of the discard 5 weeks after the wedding--the withdrawl of a false connection and the emotional detachment, the lack of joy, the negativity and toxicity as a way of life.
Janis leaflet . Take a look at . Without spot or blemish ministries. A video called jezabel and there narsissistic demons .
@@gailrosenberg48 thats such a good way you put it, gaslighting ourselves!!! So true. They gaslight us with their games and we gaslight ourselves trying to keep the spark of faith to stay and not give up on them or the marriage!!!
Its so sad and they never care about us at all. We are nothing to them. Absolutely nothing to them. The church does not care at all. They have no idea. Men especially need to be taught more in church how to treat their wives. We went to so many ministries in desperating but no one told my husband that his treatment of me was wrong. They gutless to say anything to them.
But God has taken care of me. Its been very hard. But God is good. He loves us and like the woman thrown at His feet He has compassion for us 🙏🏻✝️💞
@@daniellepearls6714 God bless you, sister. Please get your strength from God because this journey requires supernatural power. I have never held tighter to the Lord than I have thru this healing process. It takes a lot of time and effort--something the narc will not and cannot do. I have released him to God fully with no further concern for what comes his way becomes he, like all of us, has free will. See you in the clouds when Jesus takes us to Himself and wipes away every tear!!!! Glory!
Narc Parents are curses and a curse.
I didn’t stand a chance!
But for Christ, God made a way
It's truly the Holy Spirit that led me to this video and your other videos. Thank you my sister in Christ
You’re so welcome. Many blessings! 🙏🏽🕊
Amen!
This was extremely helpful. The Lord led me here. Grateful for your council.
48 years in a hard marriage...just am now learning about narcissistic people. Videos such as this one are helping me to feel not so alone and such a failure and that somehow I did something wrong and God isn't releasing me yet, and this is going to be my life until I die.
How are you , one year on?
You are amazing. Your voice carries the promise of hope from some place of redemption. Finally a channel on narcissism which is clearly centered in Christ. Yes we can find redemption in what we’ve suffered. God bless you Shaneen!
Yes God has a reason for everything. Sometimes we are meant to do his work.
Wow thank you Shaneen great information. I have listened to alot of the coaches on the subject of narcissism/toxic relationships and I must say you bring a fresh and new insight on the subject much appreciated. You have touched on things I have not heard the others speak on. You are very easy to listen to and I am certainly looking forward to listening to and watching more of your videos. You are a blessing. 😇🙏
Yvette, thank you so much for your encouraging feedback. 🥰 Bless you!
I have been binge watching your channel for the past 2 days. You have no idea how your channel and your knowledge of the scriptures has restored my faith. I was truly losing heart. I really hope I am learning what He is trying to teach me. I'm ready to move on to the next step. Transition is here, and I feel it is being slowed by the toxic people I am waiting to get rid of. I literally need God to run me over with his spiritual Chariot to help me to understand his plan clearly... I really don't trust my judgment because of where I am now. 😥
But the good news is I know that he is bringing knowledge and understanding into my life at this time when I am truly ready to receive it. His grace is endless.... I just gotta stop complaining about my trial through the desert 🙂
Thank you so much for your video today...I was with a Narcissist for a year and a half, but left him due to I saw a text message from another woman, whom he had behind myback...That was my sign from GOD that it was time for me to leave...so THANKFUL I LEFT!!! NO WAY GOING BACK TO HIM!!!
Update God has released me from this marriage, I'm so happy my divorce will be finalized this year! This marriage started off well but very slowly began to be so toxic and now, its finally going to be over! I wish to give you a big hug 🤗 thank you!!
Congratulations !! Now your happiness can start. Be careful though there is alot of toxic people out there.
Shaneen has help me so much to understand my 7 years of narcissistic abuse, god bless her, Jesus saved me and is teaching me to become a better man daily . Thank you Shaneen.
I needed to hear this so bad. Amazing how God works .😭😭😭
I'm so glad the video spoke to you. May God bring the breakthroughs you have been asking Him for in Jesus' name. 🙏🏽💕🕊
Learning to trust God in all places
Is essential for life on this Earth
Even in the bad moments we have
She encourages us to trust God always
Safe, Sane, Sober (in your right mind) God gave me this while I was just recently fresh put of the toxicity.
You just gave me so much hope by what you said about the people in the Bible working under toxic people for so many years you have no idea how much hope this is just brought me!
His WIll for everyone is for us to glorify his name. The way you do that is portrayed in the parable of the King and his servants. When the King returns I will make sure I invested and multiplied the gifts He's given me. thank you so much. I just came across your videos, at 303am because I don't sleep, I constantly pray just to get through the day. I am not doing a good job of multiplying my gifts. Maybe, after hearing this, I'll get back on track, Thank you. Truly, God has answered my prayers with your videos. See you when the Kingdom comes. You have invested those gifts and you have glorified His name. He is pleased by you. How awesome is that! God Bless you.
so true....I did not know that....the wounds where so deep...Jesus is healing...let Him do it...allow Jesus to do the work in you, it is worth it!!!
I always felt like there was a spiritual aspect of Narcissism or Toxicity but all the experts I listened to down played it. I am so glad I was lead to your channel. Through the help of the Holy Spirit and the insights He has given you, watching you has made this journey with a Narcissist husband so much clearer. Thank you so much. It's not easy but the knowledge that I have gain and the spiritual insight on knowing how to pray and what to pray for I have a peace that I just can not describe. I am using this time to grow deeper into my relationship with God and I find now that things dont affect me as much anymore! Thank you!!! Keep doing what you are doing. I am just trusting God's timing. This will not last always.
You are a blessing to The Body of Christ 🙌❤️
I love your messages & I can see God at work in my Life when I once had no idea what was going on.
Thank you James. God bless you! 🙏🏽
Thank you for this vid. Ive always wondered why God allowed it .. for decades especially in Christian families. Ive prayed for deliverance .. of having been the target.. and used .. as a smokescreen for a family members addiction .. and narcissism. I came to understand this through wisdom I believe God gave me. It’s been a difficult row to hoe .. and done a number on me.me, but God has always been there, helping me along the way. Just being there.. to listen and carry me through. I still do pray the Lord provides a blessings …where I can rest.. not live in fight or flight To develop a trusting relationship with a Godly man capable of real love with God in the center.,It would be awesome to have an earthly man of God to love and share life with. I pray the Lord will bring this blessing .. and glorify Him .
I’m praying for this as well.
Wow, You are speaking of my life! Thank you for this Godly message! This is such a hard season and place to be in! There are other videos that say nearly the same things you are saying about being in toxic marriage relationship! God bless you Women of God!!! I couldn't understand "Why" the Lord wanted me to stay in this marriage,I thought he was punishing me or angry with me!
Bless you Angela! I've learned that when God gives us a trial, it is usually because He is happy with us! So know that God is happy with you, His beautiful daughter who is the apple of His eye. 👁
Potiphar wife was a narc she tried to get Joseph off track . When he said no she got him in trouble. Along with delilia. She even mocked him when they blinded him a lot like the narc mocks you when discarded you or triangulating you
Thank you for sharing this! It is the affirmations that I need as I transition away from a toxic relationship. The spiritual aspect of my life and my relationship with God, is the most important thing to me. I appreciate your knowledge and the time you take to put this together and share with others. ❤️
I needed this, my covert narcissists wife love to play the Sunday Christian. Christ light does not shine through. Do anything that would hint at her being a Christian are her Facebook posts every Sunday for the service link. Been growing very discouraged but this was just the thing I needed today. Thank you ❤️
I'm 54 and have been married for 27 years. My promised land...? Death. That's all. I lost my youth, I lost everything. I made a mistake and I've been paying for it all my live.
Thank you so very much for this video. I can't tell you how encouraging it is to me. God is SO good! Be blessed!
I got into a bad marriage because I got pregnant and as a Christian felt obligated to marry..still I knew I could love him because God loved me. There were red flags from the beginning. But I never thought it could be like it ended up. Now I'm getting a divorce and will be seriously considering pastoral counseling as a career. With a bend on christians in abusive relationships. I really like this video.
I’m so sorry for all you have been through. 😔 But that is awesome that you are thinking of doing a pastoral counseling degree! I believe your experience and learning is going to help many people get free. 💕
@@ShaneenMegji thank you very much. You're videos are a huge help. Absolutely huge and well done.
You are EPIC! This video made me laugh and feel lighter. You shared so much truth and wisdom and it is good medicine to my soul to hear it all! This was such a blessing. God bless.
The Holy Spirit speaks through you! Thank you Shaneen for being obedient to God's calling on your life. You are helping so many people!
WOW! Thank you Jesus
AmeN and AmeN 🙏!!
Great Spiritual Truth that makes total sense to my heart (Jesus IS. my Lord) and the ways of the world 🌎 i’ve had a couple narcissistic relationships and finally about 10 years ago I started delving into the narcissistic UA-cam categories which has been an extremely valuable resource of information that played a major role in helping the Lord heal my heart ❤️ I learned the importance of boundaries and more so the importance of forgiving ALL every day in every way ✝️ I have learned to immediately give my cares, concerns and hurts to Jesus Christ and because of it and this is probably one reason why I do not look 67,I have the energy of someone half my age and I truly do feel that the best years of my life are ahead of me. I am the latest bloomer that you will ever know and I praise God for it🙌!! This is by far one of your best videos ever!!
Thank you so much lovely lady🥰
Wow!! Thank you for sharing! I'm so glad the video blessed you. Your best years are indeed ahead of you in Jesus' name! Amen. 😊🙏🏽💕🕊
This is the most practical advice because not everyone can just leave the toxic environment easily 🙌
Blessed by your message.
Praise God. Thank you!
Thanks for this, needed it so much. I said the other day that no one had ever got me so close to God that my ex narc, I will have to thank him one day, that was the most precious gift I ever got and came from evil somehow...
This was sooooo good! I really needed it!!
Oh I'm so glad to hear that! ❤️
This was such an insightful video! I feel that connecting my healing with our father is helping me truly heal all the narcissist abuse I’ve lived with! Most videos out there just show you signs of narcissism but don’t help with the full healing we get from God! Thank you for allowing me to understand my life through scripture which is the only book I trust! Thank you!!❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
You are a GREAT teacher. Thank you for your biblical references.
Your videos are so enlightening. You're wonderful! So thankful to the Lord for you! Definitely led by the Holy Spirit.
I like the observation about some of the most toxic people being gifted people. But I would extend this to all people with extreme power/money/success. I thought about that a while ago. If you are gifted, and all you see is success in your life, there is little incentive to change bad behaviors, and people surrounding the gifted person don't have the power to correct the gifted person. In reinforcement learning (AI / computer science), an agent learns with failures and penalties. If there is a character flaw, and there is no failure/penalty, there is no incentive to change it. So this makes total sense. Then we can infer from this, that as Christians, success/power/money are not always the best thing. They could make us blind. And I think this is consistent with the Gospel.
Being married to a very narcissistic abusive husband for 38 yrs I just believe that I am being chastised for marrying him and ignoring the red flags in our beginning relationship and being so absolutely naive and not walking with God and sinning. Now I am 74 yrs old with a husband of course getting worse and worse. It’s all been my fault. Not putting Jesus first and my 3 sons first when I married him so long ago and jumped from one very abusive marriage to three years later marrying another abusive man! I know Jesus loves me but I know that I greatly sinned and am being chastised of course. 😢
Thank you for this good teaching!
You’re so welcome! God bless you. 🙏🏽😊
Thankyou sister. It reminds me of the exodus. Darkness for the unbeliever and always lite ahead for the believer. Godbless you sister love mick
God bless you too!
Same difference! Yes.
This is an excellent video. It helps to balance the pain associated with a toxic relationship and the hidden benefits thereof. One of the great benefits is knowing how and why to NOT treat people ungodly. 1 Corinthians 10:6 (NIV) says "Now these things occurred as examples to keep us from setting our hearts on evil things as they did."
Thank you Amwey! Great scripture reference. 🙏🏽💕
🔥🔥🔥
Great insight!! Love that you share with biblical perspective!!
John 8:32;36!
Maranatha!
👍☝️✌️
Thank you for your videos. The Holy Spirit led me to this to teach me about the relationship I have now. I thought it is me going crazy. Just small thing you said the egiptians were in slavery of Pharaoh instead of the israelites. Just picked it up in case someone else that doesn't know the Bible. Thanx for all your teachings. It really helps to know these things. Blessings in the name of Jesus Christ to you
Truly anointed woman you are Shaneen❤
No matter the matter, God remains faithful. This video is soothing but point number 4. is very painful. Wounds to heal deeper wounds.. Sad.
Yes, the toxic people I have met are brilliant and talented.
After so many toxic relationships in my life the trial by fire has been very deep..but now on the other side of the purging and purification I am stronger in my faith and gained so much wisdom and strength to move forward in my life with more discernment...with many betrayals and rejections enroute but it comes down to this for me and I pray it will help others...that is...REJECTION = DIVINE PROTECTION = DIVINE REDIRECTION! .. Blessings and love to you and all here present..💜
Yes. The Lord told me that when I am rejected, I must know that He accepts me all the more.
@@gailrosenberg48 you are loved!💜
Angel d could you ever amagine the person you loved so much wanted to destroy you. I no now how Samson felt being betrayed. Godbless you
@@micktaylor1991 God bless you brother !💜
I love your stuff Shaneen. Thank you ❤
New sub! On point scripturally!
Thank you and Blessings to you!
Jesus Jesus! After prayer and prayer, God finally led me to u. Thank u Jesu!🙏🏾
🙏 I really, really needed that! ❤
Thank you so much for your videos.
THANK YOU for sharing this message! 🙏🏼 💜💜💜💜
You're welcome
Wow - timely for me! Thank you so much!
This was so helpful. Thank you.
Thank For The Word📖📖📖😀✌
Excellent... thank you for this. You are spot on.
Beautiful video, thank you!
Thank you for doing this.
I have really been helped
Your videos are a blessing to me. Thank you so much💕
I really needed to hear this. Thank you Shaneen.
But I think Jacob reaped Laban over him by deceiving his father to get the blessing. I don’t understand why you see that as training. I do think King David is a better example of someone serving under a toxic leader through no fault of his own.
It still seems really unfair for God to put you in a Hosea position where your children will get hurt if redemption is impossible. I am still wrestling with it hard. It started well with no obvious red flags and both of us being self aware. Then he flipped because he would not do the deeper work.
I do not think even these answers are helping enough but thank you.
God bless you thank you for your videos
Very helpful thankyou
your videos are so helpful ...thank you
Your channel a keeper! 👍💛
Thank you
Oh my God the tree analogy is so deep 🙏🔥
Thank you.. I love your videos.. it directly touches my heart.. bless your Heart.. 🙏❤😇
Beautiful talk
This was so necessary for me to hear. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. 🙏🏻
Thank u u are a blessing 🙏❤️
Thanks darling so much 😘 very very helpful ☺ 💚💚💚💚💚💚💚🙏🌷
You are such a, blessing 💕
Shannen,
You Are God Sent To All Who Are Journeying In This World With Negative ..Toxicity.
God Has His Purpose And We Forgive Those With This Toxicity!
Shannen Thank You Very Much.
I am learning so much from your teaching from a biblical stand point, which is what I needed. It is encouraging me and making me stronger no doubt. Thank you Shaneen!
This is 5 star!☆☆☆☆☆
Thank you for your immense help and support.
Your videos are awesome. Thank you! 🕊😇🙏✝
I'm so glad you like them. God bless you! 🙏🏽🕊
A lot like Joseph's story. Thank you!
Thanks alot...you are Blessed to explain this difficult situation in our lives in a biblical way...
Thank you😭❤️
You're so welcome. God bless!
I love your scripture references!
Truth!
This is REALLY speaking to me and I recognize how God is doing the things you mentioned! Thank you so much.
Awesome teaching! Great message, another perspective that is relatable. Minds eye opening and heart calming. The Bible examples make it easier to relate to. Thank you and God bless..
I enjoyed that video. I'm in a place where I'm trying to figure out where God would like to use me.
It was helpful. Thankt♥️you.
Such good stuff. Thanks
You're welcome. 😊
Thank you. ❤
Thanks for your life changing, Biblical teaching. This is liberating. May God shower you with many great blessings. 🛐🛐🛐
God bless you. Thank you for your great insight and support.
You’re so welcome. God bless!