The 'flavors' of meanness I seem to most often run into are 1. People acting as if I've engaged in a completely unprovoked act of aggression against them. And they are NEVER able to explain what I did wrong and 2. Treating me as if I'm brain-damaged. A LOT of people have told me it's because they're intimidated and/or jealous. Thoughts?
Irrationality? If we think about it more deeply, we must realize they're not aware of their treatment towards you, and even if they are partially aware, they can't be aware of the reasoning behind it. But if they are completely aware, they must definitely feel threatened. Acting out of fear may explain it.
Something to consider. I have known many intelligent people with probably high IQ, having worked at many universities, including MIT. In fact I really worked hard to get there because I thought I would finally find a place where people were really interested in science and the hard and interesting questions. Man was I disappointed. Just like everywhere else people were fearful rule followers who cared mainly about their reputation and enforcing orthodoxy. See Fridman’s recent interview with Avi Loeb for more discussion. But generally, it seems like low IQ is not what makes for what you describe a neurotypical behavior. Many high IQ people are just as petty.
I think sensitivity also plays a big role. You can be highly intelligent but have low empathy. I had a friend like that, and I didn’t understand why he thought he was always right, but after seeing Abel’s videos I understand now. I think most of what Abel speaks about is being above average in both intelligence and sensitivity.
That's what I thought when I started working in hospitals. Finally, there would be intelligent people interested in science, and learning, right? For the most part, no.
Yes you are correct. Neurotypicals tend to value feeling good over hearing scientific or logical reasoning for a viewpoint. Just try to avoid starting intellectual conversations with neurotypicals, as they will only feel offended by any other viewpoint.
They’re not mean, they’re lost and in despair. It’s kind of sad really. They don’t realise the source of their frustration stems from their bad habits. They keep repeating everything over and over expecting a different result. In essence they are all nuts.😁
@@otakuthomas6619 Ohhh, that's sad man. Try Epictetus, he offers a great and rewarding outlook on life attainable to anyone able to understand his philosophy. I must have listened to it 30 times before fully getting it. It can change your life ua-cam.com/video/vVN-DqUqyS8/v-deo.html
@@corsicanlulu Guys. Try Epictetus, he offers a great and rewarding outlook on life attainable to anyone able to understand his philosophy. I must have listened to it 30 times before fully getting it. It can change your life ua-cam.com/video/vVN-DqUqyS8/v-deo.html
Abel, Just wanted to comment and say how much these videos have helped me construct a more accurate and healthy model of myself and the world. The discord between myself and the greater world actually got so great that in my late teens into 20; I became atypically psychotic. This has been revealed to me, through a slow health decline, to actually have been a type of arthritis that does not have any visual characteristics. I tried to tell others about the pain and difficulty navigating life, but I think my communication differences made it difficult for others to understand. Over time, as I have chipped away and treated a malady of physical issues; the psychopathologies have dropped away as well leading to me understanding that a combination of neurodivergence, high intelligence and physical pain that was not believed for a long time eventually led me to adopt a structure of the world that had its basis in me not percieving reality correctly at all. Your videos have been one of the very few experiences I have had where I can actually relate to someone else and I value it immensely. In particular I really appreciate and value your approach to intellictual giftedness and neurodivergence as not just a positive and also not measured in a "above or below way". This is incredibly valuable to me as I am really uncomfortable calling myself gifted or neurodivergent in any space. It allows me to be more accepting of myself and to take things a little more slowly. Glad I found you, even if it's at 23 years old. Hi from the USA and hope you are doing well.
Neurotypicals do something that psychopaths do. They have personas and storylines that seem artificial. The difference is healthy neurotypicals strive the be like their persona to varying degrees, while psychopaths use their persona as an instrument that allows them to fit into society and receive what people with that persona ought to receive according to the responsibilities of that persona. Just some thoughts.
I think projection is not that big a problem compaired to how they treat us... they have tastes, we have caprices. they have opinions, we have obsessions. they just defend themself, we have fit with no reason. They know amd understand, we need to be told what is what. it's not projection or perception, it's a different set of rules. and if we do to them the same shit they do to us, we are told that those are shitty things to do to 'people'... as we are not 'people'...
How I've been and probably always will be is a social observer, and I really feel odd in that sense. It always strikes me as though very few people are going about their daily lives paying much attention to their surroundings. I feel as though that observer/non-observer dichotomy may be a part of the neurodivergent/neurotypical experience. I usually feel a great amount of bewilderment by how others are going about their daily encounters with their surroundings, and in turn how I go about encountering said surroundings. I feel very present to the situation at hand, and it feels like others are in another place. Ultimately I see being a neurodivergent person as a good oppurtunity to explore the actual world, not the social world for all it has to offer. You may not be conditioned to become a social butterfly in the mainstream, but their are many tastes, sights, sounds, adventures, hobbies, etc to be experienced, that if you were tied down to the social matrix like most people seem to be you would miss out on big time. Just my thoughts. And I don't think it 's impossible to meet likeminded individuals, you're probably just going to have to venture out to different areas than you currently frequent, maybe step out of the mainstream and get more creative, as I think creativity is something neurodivergent people have a proclivity towards.
In my humble opinion, the following are some of the personality, behavioral and cognitive traits of neurotypical people: Poor decision making Lack of critical thinking Closed-mindedness Impulsive action Unable to learn from mistakes Struggle with planning Poor risk assessment Limited curiosity Arrogance Overconfidence Low self-awareness Impatience Aggressiveness Need for immediate gratification Gullibility Naivety Inattentiveness Multitasking Oblivious to important matters Un-mindfullness Suffering from Dunning-Kruger effect Obsession with triviality and mediocrity Low conscientiousness Seeking attention and approval Moodiness Poor attention Lack of rational reasoning
True. From observing people, expectations seem to be part of their lifestyle. Personally, I don’t expect much at all. I work at what I want from life, and the only thing that disappoints me is people. I don’t need a lot of social interaction as I’m happier alone and creating whatever. I don’t need praise for my achievements, I can see for myself if what I’ve done has given me satisfaction. Just not a competitive type of person, strangely I do extremely well without caring about winning. Makes me laugh actually.
Great video. Hey Abel, do you know about this idea that people tend to select a niche that reflects their genotype? So for example a neurodivergent person would tend to gravitate towards other neurodivergents, or neurodivergent activities/hobbies.
To all who feel different, go watch the series X-Men 97! The mutant metaphor of the story applies so well to neurodivergence. The show does an incredible job at expressing how it feels to be different, in the most profound and brutal way.
@Abel If you haven't read it yet, I recommend the following book: www.amazon.com/Dabrowskis-Theory-Positive-Disintegration-Mendaglio/dp/0910707847 anbei ein Link mit einer kurzen Erklärung: ua-cam.com/video/Wdl2BUXPYLQ/v-deo.html
I've been interested in narcissism, sociopathy, psychopathy and the crimes related to it for a very long time. Psychopathy is innate and there are reportedly 1-2% of these people. You can already recognize psychopathic behavior in children, but it is rarely diagnosed, especially since you have a lot of respect for it, while otherwise you very quickly put all kinds of "diagnostic stamps" on children. These children kill the grandmother's dog and tell their parents about it without emotion. Others push their siblings down the stairs or try to murder them. These parents can NEVER leave the children together alone, it can be fatal. Psychopaths also like to be among their own kind, there is no need to pretend and can forge "bad" plans together to formulate it sarcastically. Sociopathy is "acquired", so the cause of this disorder usually lies in childhood. Depending on the IQ, psychopaths are found either in prison before the age of thirty or in high levels (stock exchange, management, banking, etc.). Therefore, as a "normal mortal" it is probably difficult to meet one, which is better. There are also people with psychopathic traits but not enough to be a "full" psychopath. But what I think there are “too many” are people with high narcissistic proportions and sadistic tendencies. Unfortunately, narcissism has become “socially acceptable” in our society, which is why it is becoming more and more noticeable. After I also dealt with giftedness and high sensitivity, I came to the conclusion that we gifted are the counterpart to the psychopaths, both in terms of our high sensitivity and empathy ability as well as in terms of our statistical - numerical occurrence.
Not only gifted people perceive neurotypicals as mean. Being one myself, i always perceived(when i was younger in particular ) the people around me as mean (even ones who seemed kinder like women in a way or another would had some stark and mean attitudes). They told me i had to toughen up. That's what i did. By encoraging myself to be meaner tougher,more blunt and direct i ended up being like the great majority of people(temperamentally wise). Being like that now almost feels natural. Maybe because we have the potential to be bad and our "kindness" is/was more likely a product of the ineptitude to defend ourselves rather than a proper virtue.
I tell you that since i perceived in your words a will to categorize "them(neurotypicals wich i am part of) as bad and us(gifted people wich im not part of) as good".
@@albertodemarchi9562 With my contribution I explicitly meant not only neurotypical or highly gifted people, but ALL people, chimpanzees and bonobos if you will! Narcissism, sociopathy and psychopathy affect the cross-section of humanity and therefore basically each of us. Everyone has narcissistic aspects, some of them also have one or the other psychopathic, but this is by no means a narcissist or psychopath. As far as neurotypical people are concerned, I can't really say what their drive or way of thinking is, because I perceive, think and tick completely differently. What I can say with certainty, however, is that they cannot perceive us highly gifted correctly and thus mirror us wrongly (reflect). This causes micro-injuries to the gifted every day, but these have massive effects over many years, especially on the self-worth of those affected. Every neurotypical is constantly surrounded by his own kind and with full pants it is easy to stink! I therefore advise the neurotypical who understandably cannot understand how it feels to never belong, not even if the social group is nice to try it out for themselves. Mensa meetings are open to everyone, you just have to go and let a group of highly talented people influence you, how it feels to not fit in! I've already experienced this several times, you can see how uncomfortable they feel about it, they usually move away, play around with their smartphone or otherwise take themselves out. This is how it is for us, highly gifted, day in and day out, that's the big difference! If you then say that as a forty-year-old woman in the second half of your life, after many years of suffering, you only want to surround yourself primarily with your own kind, the neurotypical people perceive you as "arrogant" and "selfish". Nobody who is not affected can and may afford to judge it! I do not judge the neurotypical ones as long as they do not harm my children or myself. Unfortunately, I have to watch what goes wrong in schools every day and iron out at home what the system has broken so that my children don't get too much damage. After all, if you compare their IQ value with that of a normally gifted person, they are surrounded by nothing but "morons" who have to be judged and ordered around by them. Linda Silverman, a luminary in the field of giftedness, said something like: "For a highly gifted person in a class with all normal gifted people it feels like for a normal gifted person in a class with all mongoloid people." I read and hear so many stories of suffering of gifted schoolchildren, anorexia, cracks and suicide attempts, drug abuse, not to mention the many misdiagnoses (see James T. Webb double diagnoses and misdiagnoses of giftedness), in children who have often not even reached adolescence, are not uncommon!
@@albertodemarchi9562 "Classifications" Bias and prejudice are fundamentally far from me, I prefer to get an idea of EVERY person personally. I am extroverted (ENTP ua-cam.com/video/j4YlA3aZYJQ/v-deo.html https: // ua-cam.com/video/fCKygFnf1hA/v-deo.html and "on top of that" scanner www.youtube.com / watch? v = o29KOV0jYRM) and therefore approach people aggressively, which is often misinterpreted. I am very open and basically speak to everyone, but I generally prefer online conversations with my peers, analog conversations with normally gifted people. Since knowing about my giftedness I finally no longer have the need to want to belong to the normally gifted! Since I hardly had any friends in my old life anyway, loneliness was never difficult for me, I would rather not have a friend than an inadequate one, rather be alone than one-sided contacts. The knowledge of giftedness made me free and really developed my personality. Quite a few throw their entire life upside down after the IQ test, provided they reflect on themselves and their lives sufficiently and "free" their personality. In this case, neurotypical ones in particular perceive them completely differently, which ends (clears up) friendships and enables all the more new, much deeper ones.
@@michatheresiaprimus9972 can you please send your last message again because when i click on read more It keeps opening the UA-cam link to the ENTPS video?( It happens they are so close only the link Is opened)
I think it’s sensitivity. Just as intelligence, you are born with a certain sensitivity level. I think Abel describes “intellectually gifted” as both high IQ and sensitivity. Some people are smart but have no empathy, so they still act as you stated in your comment.
Hi Abel, great content as usual! Been watching a few of your videos and I was wondering if you could cover the topics of addiction and romantic relationships. I have the feeling addictions of all types help to numb down the difference with neurotypicals.
Abel, I am autistic and I still struggle do distinguish between chimps and bonobos. A borderline person could be considered as a bonobo? I ask you this because borderline are in the same cluster b of the dsm V (together with narcissistic, psychopath, sociopath and histrionic personality disorders .
there is a gap in intellectual capacity between the average subject and the above average, possibly leading to communicative noises; as edges, which for the average individual are simply invisible, at least immediately. Thus, the amount of information left over from the brilliant is seen either as unimportant, or in a delayed manner, or is summarily disqualified; all of this, in light of the medium's impotence to capture the completeness of a problem/abstraction, with the speed and dexterity that the gifted subject is capable of using. the above average individual, if still immature, takes this reaction from the neurotypical as evilness, when there is only incomprehension.
I struggled with that a lot as a kid.when I was young I went to a really good school district. But sadly we moved to the inner city and I transferred to this really crappy school. So I became really arrogant and I disrespected my teachers and I hated my classmates, thinking of them as below me (which is not true in a cosmic perspective). I barely passed highschool because I thought I was too good to be there. So it's really important that 'gifted' people learn this stuff when they're young. I'm currently 18 and saving up so I can get my science degrees and become a student, but wouldn't have to had I of been a Humble enough to just do my schoolwork and learn what I can from those teachers who were trying their best on a low budget with too many kids, and a forced curriculum..... → get a scholarship 🥲lmao
The problem for me is that those 'edges' can scare off or cause discomfort for the average person. So whenever you try to share something you'd deem insightful, not only does it not register in their reasoning, but you're actually burning the bridge between you and them, albeit in a very small, subtle way. That is of course if you exclude the scenario in which you're actually being weird, because that's always a possibility.
I think one is fairly independent of the other. Sociopathy is more of a nurture thing, so any kind of neurobiological setup can become sociopathic according to circumstances. But also psychopathy can combine with autism in my opinion. So you can have autism with or without sociopathy, narcissism, psychopathy.
I personally have found that one is never autistic AND Cluster B (or C). And yes so far it seems that said personality disorders occur only in neurodivergent people.
yes thank-you AA i understand a tiny bit better now, U explain it better that i could in my own head. I used to think it was just blatant NT-racism (but maybe i'm too sensitive sometimes i.d.k.)
Dear all Neurodivigents, Please do not rise up one day in a fit of rage realizing you can replace us all with robots and get rid of overpopulation by killing all the neurotypicals. Love, a cynical sheeple.
@@FatherJohnny-oh4dh Hahaha! Well, I do have an X-Men Arcade in my living room! It was my favorite game as a child. As an adult, I love it even more. It reminds me of all the fun we had as kids. And it looks super cool loll :) Never stop playing and having fun!
Btw what do you do if you're attracted to Nt girls ? All of the H-word [hypergamy/girl-stuff] advice channels on YT are gear'd 100% toward NTs. I've heard from some people that inter-racial relationships (meaning; Nt-Asd) have problems :s ,some persons have told me go out with autistic girls But i like the Nt ones for some reason , i think i'm stuck :s :s :s ....
You have to realise they will act very immoral, they will seem very harsh, you will wonder why they would do such horrible things to you. Me, I finally met a beautiful doctor, we never lie, cheat, or act abusive toward each other. Having a rule of no lies, cheating, or abuse weeded out all of the psychos, narcissists and NT. Leave if they show any of those signs. It was the best decision I ever made, I was out of relationships the instant these signs showed up, saving me years of torment from bad relationships and allowing me to find someone who shares and values the importance of a life partner.
Figure It out yourself i would say...do you know her well enough? Have you opened up yourself with her(interests/hobbies/ideas)? You will understand if the relationship can work in that way. Are you bored by her? You pretend to be interested to what she says? If that's the case you shouldnt start the relationship imo. For heavens sake you can still start one and make it work but you have to know it's your responsibility to keep everything going. You can still separate but it's a bit easy to have the trial and error mentality with people(and quite immoral imo). There isnt much logic in choosing a partner(what you want to do? Measure her height,facial proportions,BMI index, somministrate her an IQ test and a personality one? Cmon' man it's about feeling sometimes). Are you and Aspie btw?
@@joe-hanhairy3882 what does race have to do with it? This channel is focused on the IQ axis of neurotypical. So yes, if you have high IQ, most people will have lower IQ. This will not work in the long term because lower IQ people just don’t understand many things; what is important to them is different. They are generally interested most in fitting in and micro slices of status. Their version of reality is tailored to these things, yet they think they are see reality as it truly is. This can only last so long.
Once i stumbled into a Asperger's kid and she's sort of autism in denial... i think it's good for many gifted individuals, I've seen a high iq person with similar struggles.
What do you mean with all this throwing around the term psychopath? As far as i know, there is no formal diagnosis of psychopathy, and by your use, it seems you qualify this diagnostic on behaviour which is unsympathetic at its root. Which i personally think is hard or impossible to determine realistically, or in terms of actual neurology, and not pathology. In regards to neurotypicals/atypicals and psychopaths, i think theses probably have some overlap. I did not study the literature though
Hi Thank you We can go deeper and explore how subconscious biological death anxiety triggers defensive or mean behaviors in neurotypicals and defensiveness within neurodivergents. Thanks again
@@timefortee neurodivergent implies the brain structure ASPD can be neurodivergent or NT the psychopath has the NT brain structure with a dysfunctional amygdala.
I don't think being smarter or more intelligent makes someone a better person, or more valuable as a (human) being. It's a neutral characteristic without merit or special value, like shoe size or the shape of your kidneys. So what arrogance?
Hi @@Abel.Abelson All of my life I have been characterized by my neurotypical family as being arrogant for just being and expressing confidence and more knowledge than they do. I have come to realize that their understandable misunderstanding of me, and their personal feelings of insecurity and incompetence, and their normal feelings of human insignificance and death anxiety, drive them to feel irrationally defensive and therefore are root causes of why they unfairly and meanly use me as their family scapegoat. Thank you for being a pioneer online that is neutrally reframing what it means to be a smarter or more intelligent human being than the majority of humans. And. Thank you for expressing why I am okay with and am actually refreshed by others who communicate as neurodivergents do.
The 'flavors' of meanness I seem to most often run into are 1. People acting as if I've engaged in a completely unprovoked act of aggression against them. And they are NEVER able to explain what I did wrong and 2. Treating me as if I'm brain-damaged.
A LOT of people have told me it's because they're intimidated and/or jealous.
Thoughts?
My world exactly. It sucks.
Irrationality? If we think about it more deeply, we must realize they're not aware of their treatment towards you, and even if they are partially aware, they can't be aware of the reasoning behind it. But if they are completely aware, they must definitely feel threatened. Acting out of fear may explain it.
Something to consider. I have known many intelligent people with probably high IQ, having worked at many universities, including MIT. In fact I really worked hard to get there because I thought I would finally find a place where people were really interested in science and the hard and interesting questions. Man was I disappointed. Just like everywhere else people were fearful rule followers who cared mainly about their reputation and enforcing orthodoxy. See Fridman’s recent interview with Avi Loeb for more discussion. But generally, it seems like low IQ is not what makes for what you describe a neurotypical behavior. Many high IQ people are just as petty.
Check out Cipolla's Laws of Human Stupidity
Agreed. A smart person born in Nazi Germany just becomes a Nazi quicker.
I think sensitivity also plays a big role. You can be highly intelligent but have low empathy. I had a friend like that, and I didn’t understand why he thought he was always right, but after seeing Abel’s videos I understand now.
I think most of what Abel speaks about is being above average in both intelligence and sensitivity.
That's what I thought when I started working in hospitals. Finally, there would be intelligent people interested in science, and learning, right? For the most part, no.
I stopped discussing things with most people. Most people don't want a genuine development. It takes courage to take the risk to be bullied etc.
Yes you are correct. Neurotypicals tend to value feeling good over hearing scientific or logical reasoning for a viewpoint.
Just try to avoid starting intellectual conversations with neurotypicals, as they will only feel offended by any other viewpoint.
Same.I rather think "neuroaverage", "neuroconformist", or "neuromediocre"
They’re not mean, they’re lost and in despair. It’s kind of sad really.
They don’t realise the source of their frustration stems from their bad habits.
They keep repeating everything over and over expecting a different result.
In essence they are all nuts.😁
i think they are very, very insecure which makes them mean when they are trying to defend themselves
i guess im neurotypical.. and ye im lost and in despair i even have depression!
@@otakuthomas6619 i have depression too but im not neurotypical. depression has nothing to do w/ that
@@otakuthomas6619 Ohhh, that's sad man. Try Epictetus, he offers a great and rewarding outlook on life attainable to anyone able to understand his philosophy.
I must have listened to it 30 times before fully getting it.
It can change your life
ua-cam.com/video/vVN-DqUqyS8/v-deo.html
@@corsicanlulu Guys. Try Epictetus, he offers a great and rewarding outlook on life attainable to anyone able to understand his philosophy.
I must have listened to it 30 times before fully getting it.
It can change your life
ua-cam.com/video/vVN-DqUqyS8/v-deo.html
Abel,
Just wanted to comment and say how much these videos have helped me construct a more accurate and healthy model of myself and the world. The discord between myself and the greater world actually got so great that in my late teens into 20; I became atypically psychotic. This has been revealed to me, through a slow health decline, to actually have been a type of arthritis that does not have any visual characteristics. I tried to tell others about the pain and difficulty navigating life, but I think my communication differences made it difficult for others to understand. Over time, as I have chipped away and treated a malady of physical issues; the psychopathologies have dropped away as well leading to me understanding that a combination of neurodivergence, high intelligence and physical pain that was not believed for a long time eventually led me to adopt a structure of the world that had its basis in me not percieving reality correctly at all. Your videos have been one of the very few experiences I have had where I can actually relate to someone else and I value it immensely. In particular I really appreciate and value your approach to intellictual giftedness and neurodivergence as not just a positive and also not measured in a "above or below way". This is incredibly valuable to me as I am really uncomfortable calling myself gifted or neurodivergent in any space. It allows me to be more accepting of myself and to take things a little more slowly. Glad I found you, even if it's at 23 years old. Hi from the USA and hope you are doing well.
23 is really young! You have a very long life ahead. Enjoy it.
Neurotypicals do something that psychopaths do. They have personas and storylines that seem artificial. The difference is healthy neurotypicals strive the be like their persona to varying degrees, while psychopaths use their persona as an instrument that allows them to fit into society and receive what people with that persona ought to receive according to the responsibilities of that persona. Just some thoughts.
Beautiful notion.👍🏻
So fuck them in essence
Accurate, very accurate.
They are so easily threatened, yet so easily bullies if your differences don't match the mainstream idea of diversity.
"Neuro conformist" would be more accurate
I think projection is not that big a problem compaired to how they treat us...
they have tastes, we have caprices.
they have opinions, we have obsessions.
they just defend themself, we have fit with no reason.
They know amd understand, we need to be told what is what.
it's not projection or perception, it's a different set of rules. and if we do to them the same shit they do to us, we are told that those are shitty things to do to 'people'...
as we are not 'people'...
You may have described slavery in a sense
How I've been and probably always will be is a social observer, and I really feel odd in that sense. It always strikes me as though very few people are going about their daily lives paying much attention to their surroundings. I feel as though that observer/non-observer dichotomy may be a part of the neurodivergent/neurotypical experience. I usually feel a great amount of bewilderment by how others are going about their daily encounters with their surroundings, and in turn how I go about encountering said surroundings. I feel very present to the situation at hand, and it feels like others are in another place.
Ultimately I see being a neurodivergent person as a good oppurtunity to explore the actual world, not the social world for all it has to offer. You may not be conditioned to become a social butterfly in the mainstream, but their are many tastes, sights, sounds, adventures, hobbies, etc to be experienced, that if you were tied down to the social matrix like most people seem to be you would miss out on big time.
Just my thoughts. And I don't think it 's impossible to meet likeminded individuals, you're probably just going to have to venture out to different areas than you currently frequent, maybe step out of the mainstream and get more creative, as I think creativity is something neurodivergent people have a proclivity towards.
In my humble opinion, the following are some of the personality, behavioral and cognitive traits of neurotypical people:
Poor decision making
Lack of critical thinking
Closed-mindedness
Impulsive action
Unable to learn from mistakes
Struggle with planning
Poor risk assessment
Limited curiosity
Arrogance
Overconfidence
Low self-awareness
Impatience
Aggressiveness
Need for immediate gratification
Gullibility
Naivety
Inattentiveness
Multitasking
Oblivious to important matters
Un-mindfullness
Suffering from Dunning-Kruger effect
Obsession with triviality and mediocrity
Low conscientiousness
Seeking attention and approval
Moodiness
Poor attention
Lack of rational reasoning
the problem is expectation, and that applies to hapiness in any aspect of life
True. From observing people, expectations seem to be part of their lifestyle. Personally, I don’t expect much at all. I work at what I want from life, and the only thing that disappoints me is people. I don’t need a lot of social interaction as I’m happier alone and creating whatever. I don’t need praise for my achievements, I can see for myself if what I’ve done has given me satisfaction. Just not a competitive type of person, strangely I do extremely well without caring about winning. Makes me laugh actually.
Great channel, I just started watching.
Great video. Hey Abel, do you know about this idea that people tend to select a niche that reflects their genotype? So for example a neurodivergent person would tend to gravitate towards other neurodivergents, or neurodivergent activities/hobbies.
Interesting
i dont believe i am intellectually gifted but i can relate a lot to your videos
That's great! Thanks for watching and letting me know🙂!
To all who feel different, go watch the series X-Men 97! The mutant metaphor of the story applies so well to neurodivergence. The show does an incredible job at expressing how it feels to be different, in the most profound and brutal way.
Thank you so much I need this content to survive :)
@Abel If you haven't read it yet, I recommend the following book: www.amazon.com/Dabrowskis-Theory-Positive-Disintegration-Mendaglio/dp/0910707847 anbei ein Link mit einer kurzen Erklärung: ua-cam.com/video/Wdl2BUXPYLQ/v-deo.html
I've been interested in narcissism, sociopathy, psychopathy and the crimes related to it for a very long time. Psychopathy is innate and there are reportedly 1-2% of these people. You can already recognize psychopathic behavior in children, but it is rarely diagnosed, especially since you have a lot of respect for it, while otherwise you very quickly put all kinds of "diagnostic stamps" on children. These children kill the grandmother's dog and tell their parents about it without emotion. Others push their siblings down the stairs or try to murder them. These parents can NEVER leave the children together alone, it can be fatal. Psychopaths also like to be among their own kind, there is no need to pretend and can forge "bad" plans together to formulate it sarcastically. Sociopathy is "acquired", so the cause of this disorder usually lies in childhood. Depending on the IQ, psychopaths are found either in prison before the age of thirty or in high levels (stock exchange, management, banking, etc.). Therefore, as a "normal mortal" it is probably difficult to meet one, which is better. There are also people with psychopathic traits but not enough to be a "full" psychopath. But what I think there are “too many” are people with high narcissistic proportions and sadistic tendencies. Unfortunately, narcissism has become “socially acceptable” in our society, which is why it is becoming more and more noticeable. After I also dealt with giftedness and high sensitivity, I came to the conclusion that we gifted are the counterpart to the psychopaths, both in terms of our high sensitivity and empathy ability as well as in terms of our statistical - numerical occurrence.
Not only gifted people perceive neurotypicals as mean. Being one myself, i always perceived(when i was younger in particular ) the people around me as mean (even ones who seemed kinder like women in a way or another would had some stark and mean attitudes). They told me i had to toughen up. That's what i did. By encoraging myself to be meaner tougher,more blunt and direct i ended up being like the great majority of people(temperamentally wise). Being like that now almost feels natural. Maybe because we have the potential to be bad and our "kindness" is/was more likely a product of the ineptitude to defend ourselves rather than a proper virtue.
I tell you that since i perceived in your words a will to categorize "them(neurotypicals wich i am part of) as bad and us(gifted people wich im not part of) as good".
@@albertodemarchi9562 With my contribution I explicitly meant not only neurotypical or highly gifted people, but ALL people, chimpanzees and bonobos if you will! Narcissism, sociopathy and psychopathy affect the cross-section of humanity and therefore basically each of us. Everyone has narcissistic aspects, some of them also have one or the other psychopathic, but this is by no means a narcissist or psychopath. As far as neurotypical people are concerned, I can't really say what their drive or way of thinking is, because I perceive, think and tick completely differently. What I can say with certainty, however, is that they cannot perceive us highly gifted correctly and thus mirror us wrongly (reflect). This causes micro-injuries to the gifted every day, but these have massive effects over many years, especially on the self-worth of those affected. Every neurotypical is constantly surrounded by his own kind and with full pants it is easy to stink! I therefore advise the neurotypical who understandably cannot understand how it feels to never belong, not even if the social group is nice to try it out for themselves. Mensa meetings are open to everyone, you just have to go and let a group of highly talented people influence you, how it feels to not fit in! I've already experienced this several times, you can see how uncomfortable they feel about it, they usually move away, play around with their smartphone or otherwise take themselves out. This is how it is for us, highly gifted, day in and day out, that's the big difference! If you then say that as a forty-year-old woman in the second half of your life, after many years of suffering, you only want to surround yourself primarily with your own kind, the neurotypical people perceive you as "arrogant" and "selfish". Nobody who is not affected can and may afford to judge it! I do not judge the neurotypical ones as long as they do not harm my children or myself. Unfortunately, I have to watch what goes wrong in schools every day and iron out at home what the system has broken so that my children don't get too much damage. After all, if you compare their IQ value with that of a normally gifted person, they are surrounded by nothing but "morons" who have to be judged and ordered around by them. Linda Silverman, a luminary in the field of giftedness, said something like: "For a highly gifted person in a class with all normal gifted people it feels like for a normal gifted person in a class with all mongoloid people." I read and hear so many stories of suffering of gifted schoolchildren, anorexia, cracks and suicide attempts, drug abuse, not to mention the many misdiagnoses (see James T. Webb double diagnoses and misdiagnoses of giftedness), in children who have often not even reached adolescence, are not uncommon!
@@albertodemarchi9562 "Classifications" Bias and prejudice are fundamentally far from me, I prefer to get an idea of EVERY person personally. I am extroverted (ENTP ua-cam.com/video/j4YlA3aZYJQ/v-deo.html https: // ua-cam.com/video/fCKygFnf1hA/v-deo.html and "on top of that" scanner www.youtube.com / watch? v = o29KOV0jYRM) and therefore approach people aggressively, which is often misinterpreted. I am very open and basically speak to everyone, but I generally prefer online conversations with my peers, analog conversations with normally gifted people. Since knowing about my giftedness I finally no longer have the need to want to belong to the normally gifted! Since I hardly had any friends in my old life anyway, loneliness was never difficult for me, I would rather not have a friend than an inadequate one, rather be alone than one-sided contacts. The knowledge of giftedness made me free and really developed my personality. Quite a few throw their entire life upside down after the IQ test, provided they reflect on themselves and their lives sufficiently and "free" their personality. In this case, neurotypical ones in particular perceive them completely differently, which ends (clears up) friendships and enables all the more new, much deeper ones.
@@michatheresiaprimus9972 can you please send your last message again because when i click on read more It keeps opening the UA-cam link to the ENTPS video?( It happens they are so close only the link Is opened)
Lots of high IQ people are normies - that's to say corrupt. It's truly a question of the soul.
I think it’s sensitivity. Just as intelligence, you are born with a certain sensitivity level. I think Abel describes “intellectually gifted” as both high IQ and sensitivity.
Some people are smart but have no empathy, so they still act as you stated in your comment.
Hi Abel, great content as usual! Been watching a few of your videos and I was wondering if you could cover the topics of addiction and romantic relationships. I have the feeling addictions of all types help to numb down the difference with neurotypicals.
Thanks :) Yes, interesting subject, noted...
Abel, I am autistic and I still struggle do distinguish between chimps and bonobos. A borderline person could be considered as a bonobo? I ask you this because borderline are in the same cluster b of the dsm V (together with narcissistic, psychopath, sociopath and histrionic personality disorders .
This makes me wonder if NTs can mistake NDs for psychopaths in the same way.
you look a bit like mads mikkelsen
there is a gap in intellectual capacity between the average subject and the above average, possibly leading to communicative noises; as edges, which for the average individual are simply invisible, at least immediately. Thus, the amount of information left over from the brilliant is seen either as unimportant, or in a delayed manner, or is summarily disqualified; all of this, in light of the medium's impotence to capture the completeness of a problem/abstraction, with the speed and dexterity that the gifted subject is capable of using.
the above average individual, if still immature, takes this reaction from the neurotypical as evilness, when there is only incomprehension.
I struggled with that a lot as a kid.when I was young I went to a really good school district. But sadly we moved to the inner city and I transferred to this really crappy school.
So I became really arrogant and I disrespected my teachers and I hated my classmates, thinking of them as below me (which is not true in a cosmic perspective). I barely passed highschool because I thought I was too good to be there.
So it's really important that 'gifted' people learn this stuff when they're young.
I'm currently 18 and saving up so I can get my science degrees and become a student, but wouldn't have to had I of been a
Humble enough to just do my schoolwork and learn what I can from those teachers who were trying their best on a low budget with too many kids, and a forced curriculum.....
→ get a scholarship 🥲lmao
How can you use so many big words but have such terrible grammar? 😮
The problem for me is that those 'edges' can scare off or cause discomfort for the average person. So whenever you try to share something you'd deem insightful, not only does it not register in their reasoning, but you're actually burning the bridge between you and them, albeit in a very small, subtle way.
That is of course if you exclude the scenario in which you're actually being weird, because that's always a possibility.
Question for you. Do you think Autistc/Neurodivergent people can be psychopaths/Narcisists/Soiopaths? I'm Autistic myself.
I think one is fairly independent of the other. Sociopathy is more of a nurture thing, so any kind of neurobiological setup can become sociopathic according to circumstances. But also psychopathy can combine with autism in my opinion. So you can have autism with or without sociopathy, narcissism, psychopathy.
I personally have found that one is never autistic AND Cluster B (or C).
And yes so far it seems that said personality disorders occur only in neurodivergent people.
How can you make money if I have not done well working in companies? Any starting point? I know some math, programming. any advice? thank you.
Freelancing... finding customers who are willing to pay for what you can offer.
Yes, and try to find your first few clients using your family, and your friends
Start a UA-cam channel
You appear to have slender, muscular hands. Also, lively plants. Nice video.
he's kinda hawt, also the accent. No homo but our man has alpha nerd potential
yes thank-you AA i understand a tiny bit better now, U explain it better that i could in my own head. I used to think it was just blatant NT-racism (but maybe i'm too sensitive sometimes i.d.k.)
Glad I could be of help :)
Dear all Neurodivigents,
Please do not rise up one day in a fit of rage realizing you can replace us all with robots and get rid of overpopulation by killing all the neurotypicals.
Love,
a cynical sheeple.
Please explain the reasoning behind your entire statement.
What a lovely idea!
**Tinkers with army of robots in basement**
;)
@@askani21 you must have saved your toys since you were a kid. Wish I did!
@@FatherJohnny-oh4dh Hahaha! Well, I do have an X-Men Arcade in my living room! It was my favorite game as a child. As an adult, I love it even more. It reminds me of all the fun we had as kids. And it looks super cool loll :)
Never stop playing and having fun!
Btw what do you do if you're attracted to Nt girls ? All of the H-word [hypergamy/girl-stuff] advice channels on YT are gear'd 100% toward NTs. I've heard from some people that inter-racial relationships (meaning; Nt-Asd) have problems :s ,some persons have told me go out with autistic girls But i like the Nt ones for some reason , i think i'm stuck :s :s :s ....
You have to realise they will act very immoral, they will seem very harsh, you will wonder why they would do such horrible things to you.
Me, I finally met a beautiful doctor, we never lie, cheat, or act abusive toward each other.
Having a rule of no lies, cheating, or abuse weeded out all of the psychos, narcissists and NT.
Leave if they show any of those signs.
It was the best decision I ever made, I was out of relationships the instant these signs showed up, saving me years of torment from bad relationships and allowing me to find someone who shares and values the importance of a life partner.
Figure It out yourself i would say...do you know her well enough? Have you opened up yourself with her(interests/hobbies/ideas)? You will understand if the relationship can work in that way. Are you bored by her? You pretend to be interested to what she says? If that's the case you shouldnt start the relationship imo. For heavens sake you can still start one and make it work but you have to know it's your responsibility to keep everything going. You can still separate but it's a bit easy to have the trial and error mentality with people(and quite immoral imo). There isnt much logic in choosing a partner(what you want to do? Measure her height,facial proportions,BMI index, somministrate her an IQ test and a personality one? Cmon' man it's about feeling sometimes). Are you and Aspie btw?
You have to find someone in the same IQ band.
@@zwatwashdc ,so does this mean NTs are low-iq ? (without meaning to be racist to them)
@@joe-hanhairy3882 what does race have to do with it? This channel is focused on the IQ axis of neurotypical. So yes, if you have high IQ, most people will have lower IQ. This will not work in the long term because lower IQ people just don’t understand many things; what is important to them is different. They are generally interested most in fitting in and micro slices of status. Their version of reality is tailored to these things, yet they think they are see reality as it truly is. This can only last so long.
Abel, what happens if i turn off a neurobioooec configuration of my brain?
what happens if i turn off the neurobiological configuration of my brain?
Once i stumbled into a Asperger's kid and she's sort of autism in denial... i think it's good for many gifted individuals, I've seen a high iq person with similar struggles.
One thing my grandma deal with Nts is avoiding them .
She's a solitary human being, as i grow up ive seen deceptions everywhere and felt they're dangerous
She's social and can social well, it's just that she's reclusive, I'm grateful
What do you mean with all this throwing around the term psychopath? As far as i know, there is no formal diagnosis of psychopathy, and by your use, it seems you qualify this diagnostic on behaviour which is unsympathetic at its root. Which i personally think is hard or impossible to determine realistically, or in terms of actual neurology, and not pathology.
In regards to neurotypicals/atypicals and psychopaths, i think theses probably have some overlap. I did not study the literature though
They repeat one thousand times the same (jokes, stories, etc) to affirm their ego I guess hahhhaaaa!
Attention, recognition and approval seeking, maybe.
Hi
Thank you
We can go deeper and explore how subconscious biological death anxiety triggers defensive or mean behaviors in neurotypicals and defensiveness within neurodivergents.
Thanks again
psychocopaths are the NT's little monster alot if the time
No, in my experience it is only neurodivergent people who develop personality disorders, including the one you mentioned
@@timefortee the psychopath is pretty much an NT with a shrunk amygdala aka a brain injury due to child abuse!
@@ahmadag1820 No, a person with ASPD is born with the *narcissistic* neurotype which is _neurodivergent_ .
@@timefortee neurodivergent implies the brain structure ASPD can be neurodivergent or NT the psychopath has the NT brain structure with a dysfunctional amygdala.
So you are saying you are different because you are smarter, more intelligent. Biologically so. Sounds a little arrogant.
I don't think being smarter or more intelligent makes someone a better person, or more valuable as a (human) being. It's a neutral characteristic without merit or special value, like shoe size or the shape of your kidneys. So what arrogance?
Hi @@Abel.Abelson
All of my life I have been characterized by my neurotypical family as being arrogant for just being and expressing confidence and more knowledge than they do.
I have come to realize that their understandable misunderstanding of me, and their personal feelings of insecurity and incompetence, and their normal feelings of human insignificance and death anxiety, drive them to feel irrationally defensive and therefore are root causes of why they unfairly and meanly use me as their family scapegoat.
Thank you for being a pioneer online that is neutrally reframing what it means to be a smarter or more intelligent human being than the majority of humans.
And. Thank you for expressing why I am okay with and am actually refreshed by others who communicate as neurodivergents do.
Some ppl are smarter and more intelligent biologically simple as