Successful Query Letter Examples That Attracted Top Agents
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- Опубліковано 18 тра 2024
- There is a ton of advice out there about how to craft the perfect query letter. But knowing what goes into a successful query letter is one thing; seeing actual examples of successful query letters in action is another. Today, I’m sharing two examples of real query letters that landed authors top literary agents - and discussing what makes each one so successful.
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MORE WRITING AND PUBLISHING ADVICE:
How to Write a Query Letter from Start to End: • How to Write a Query L...
How to Write the Perfect Book Blurb for Your Query Letter: Dos and Don’ts: • How to Write the Perfe...
Top 5 Elements of a Successful Query Letter: • Top 5 Elements of a Su...
SUCCESSFUL QUERY LETTER EXAMPLES:
01:11 - Stephanie Wrobel
03:46 - Victoria Wlosok
07:21 - Takeaways
ABOUT ME:
My name is Alyssa Matesic, and I’m a professional book editor with nearly a decade of book publishing and editorial experience. Throughout my career, I’ve held editorial roles across both sides of the publishing industry: Big Five publishing houses and literary agencies. The goal of this channel is to help writers throughout the book writing journey-whether you're working on your manuscript or you're looking for publishing advice.
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It would be helpful to have a series on query letters. Yes, it is helpful to see examples of query letters which shows what works and what doesn't.
Agreed
@@FalconFastest123 Yes, a series would be helpful. 😀
I would love a series like this. This was an excellent breakdown!
So glad you enjoyed it - thanks for the feedback!
It would be helpful to see sci-fi and fantasy examples... You mentioned a few times about being "short and snappy" and that might be challenging if you need to establish a little bit of wb / setting as well as you main story pitch. (and yes, the wb is required as context in my case to understand the story ).
All in all, would be a good series 👍
Look at the Query Shark's site, started by late agent, Janet Reid, she was invaluable in teaching me and many others about querying. She has hundreds of samples on her site.
Id love more examples in different genres. Maybe some sff.
Yes..I write in diff genres so I need examples of each;
Thriller, Horror, Contempo Fiction, YA..contemp fiction and thriller..and now Memoir
Yeah, I'd like to see more query examples. I'm at my third query and still trying to figure out the magic formula.
I'm up to 11 rejections with 44 literary agents queried (on 4/1/2024). Two personalized rejections and nine form rejections. The most recent was a tailored rejection from the agent, not her assistant, so I feel like I'm making progress.
One of the agents you mentioned are among those I'm waiting on a response from, Alyssa, so thank you for this topic and terrific video. I think it's all about the pitch. If I were an agent, I'd have requested a full manuscript from the first author and dispatched the second a form rejection, showing how absurdly subjective this process is.
I've always ended my queries with:
Thank you for your time and consideration.
I thought that the blurb was supposed to be just one paragraph, yet both of these ladies broke up their blurbs.
???
Yes, please do a series on successful query letters!!!
I actually listen to you while I'm at work so I can feel like I'm making progress with my querying even though my job has nothing to do with it
Work on a Sunday!? No wonder why you wanna be a successful author!
@BudsCartoon Luckily this isn't a common place thing. Our boss just promised something we couldn't manage to weekend work it is.
Interesting- I have never heard anyone suggest doing what both of these do, which is to discuss the pov and structure/timelines. Also WAY more plot than most advice tells you to put in, and no "one line blurbs" nor intro statement with the genre. And, assuming these are the complete letters, no personalization...
Yes please to more examples of successful query letters. From those two, I actually think that their structure is better. Admittedly, I like the first query letter in this more, even though it is so short.
Aside: The first query book's subject turns me off immediately - why would I want to read about a main character who *chooses* to live with the mother who already went to jail for harming her, thereby potentially endangering herself (again) as well as her own child? I immediately distrust the protagonist to make reasonable decisions. Just my reaction, but perhaps I'm missing something. Love this topic, thank you Alyssa.
Alyssa your hair looks stunning and bouncy. Thanks for these examples as I'm currently querying my historical romance novel, while also writing my second sci Fi novel. ❤
Yes..I can't focus on just one work
I have been drafting my upcoming project before editing my WIP.
Thank you, thank you, thank you! So many UA-cam videos I've watched have only explained, and not shown, what a query letter should look like. I would like to see a query letter for a memoir in one of your next videos.
"No, no, and no," said the gatekeeper and that was that.
I loved this video, my favorite so far. Yes, I would like to see, hear more query letter examples. Thanks.
So glad you enjoyed it!
This video solidified that I am on the right track, however more query letter examples please. And when mine lands an agent, I’ll submit it to your channel 😊
I am interested if this is going to be a series then I'll watch it
Sounds like the Gypsy Rose case
Exactly right.
This was so practical and helpful for me. Thanks so much for sharing such timely content.😄
I have recently begun to start my letters with the pitch/blurb, after few stated this should get the agent's attention. Keeping things to the point and listing that I have self-published few books. Sadly still got a few generic rejections but this means nothing as I have queried several more who may like my work. Still waiting for responses as of writing this.
So good to hear that this may be the right direction to go with as previously, I have used the so called housekeeping and then the blurb.
Yes please for a query letter series!
This is great (and so is your hair!). Another good query resource is Query Shark's site (priceless, really). Side note...I personally don't like fiction mysteries based on true crime cases, and I've seen an uptick in debut mysteries taking inspiration from real-life murder cases (Rose Gold/Gypsy Rose case). 😳 Do these authors need to tell their agents what inspired the story?
Yes, definitely do more of this! That was very good information.
Really high quality information. Really insightful to see good query letters, thanx!
Excellent video! It helps me feel better about the query letter I've been using. Also, it's heartening to see that first-time authors really do connect with agents!
Thank you!
Definitely could do more videos like this. Because I dunno if those fit the QueryTracker Template without being repetitive.
What do you do when in QueryTracker it asks for 1. The Query 2. The Synopsis 3. The Blurb 4. Comp titles. But.....in this letter all of those things have been established?
I would love if this was a series!
Thank you for sharing! This was very helpful. I would love to see more successful query letter examples.
No, she received a response to her query letter due to her previous publications in the Bellevue Literary Review, winning a prize for emerging writers, and being an MFA at Emerson College. It was not solely based on her writing skills. Would she have gotten a reply if she had said, "I studied at Salinas High School and went on to study English literature at Stanford University but dropped out before getting a degree? I am an unpublished author, but I have been working as a caretaker and tour guide at Lake Tahoe." I doubt it, and that would have been the end of John Steinbeck´s career.
Would an agent reply to the subsequent query letter: "After enrolling at the University of Virginia to pursue studies in ancient and modern languages, I made the decision to discontinue my education after a year. Later, I became a cadet at West Point but faced a court martial for severe negligence and disobedience. Honestly, I did not want to be there anymore; however, with the support of my friends, I managed to publish a collection of poems titled "Poems." Thank you for your time and consideration. Edgar Allan Poe?"
I don´t think so, which is why we don't see writers like Steinbeck, Poe, Hemingway, and other similar authors from past centuries anymore. They didn't check all the boxes. They were just men of immense passion who had something to say and knew how to say it very well.
Exactly. These are effective query letters but you also should be writing in a genre the current publication industry is pushing, plus have the profile (youth, looks, academic or other ‘interesting’ bio details.
Respectfully, you’ve written two extremely bad query letters from two extremely gifted writers. Their letters wouldn’t look anything like that, especially not today.
Without attempting to write an actually compelling letter in their styles, you just end up with two unskilled, dismissive paragraphs that are supposed to represent two of the most well-known, respected, and beloved authors in history?
Methinks there’s a flaw or two in there.
This was great. Would love to see more videos like this. Ty!
More query letter breakdowns please!
Great video, I really appreciate all the work you put in. Thanks a million Alyssa!
Please do more about query letters.
Timely post! Thank you! Closing in on querying time myself. Before I do, (and this is a question for a future Wednesday), is it a good idea, bad idea to seek a second editorial opinion on my book? I love the connection I have with my editor, but I always wonder if another view point would be helpful.
That would be a great series!
Super helpful! Thank you for these examples!!
It does make me feel more confident
This is an interesting format Alyssa - both of these query letters jump right into the blurb without any kind of segue into it. Everything I've learned from you and others tell me to start with some kind of introduction, especially one which personalizes it to the agent. Pardon me for sounding a bit dramatic, but are these queries not a bit risky?
It definitely is interesting that both of these happen to be formatted that way. I do know that Victoria included a personalization line when possible in her queries, and that likely came before the plot blurb (this is likely her base template, which she could customize for each query). That said, I know there are some other querying resources that do suggest jumping straight into the plot blurb - Query Shark is one that comes to mind.
I will be self publishing but the part about taking about the story is go to get ideas for hooking the readers on the description
sorry meant to say good not go
The * Halo * Effect: Yellow gold flames behind you
This is SO helpful! Thank you. One question: prior to your example, I had understood that a query should not be a teaser, but spell out a crisp plot outline. Both of these letters felt like teasers. Is there room for both, or is short-and-sweet the best?
I do recommend thinking of your query like a teaser for your book - similar to a movie trailer. It shouldn't give everything away, just enough to entice the agent to want to read more! Here's a video with my suggestions for writing a strong query letter: ua-cam.com/video/SSBcasOsRCs/v-deo.html A synopsis, on the other hand, should spell out a complete plot outline - I have another video that talks about that here: ua-cam.com/video/GpCBuCH9Vwo/v-deo.html I hope this helps!
If I was an agent I would definitely want to see the manuscript in the first, but the second I would throw in the trash. Just my opinion. 17yo with 2 employees? Figures it is YA 😂
And yet we're always told to ensure our comp titles are no more than five years old. The ones mentioned in the first query letter are waaaay older than that.
The only one out of the range was Sharp Objects published in 2006. The other example was definitely within the five year range. Just look them up.
@@TheEccentricRaven No it wasn't. Good Me Bad Me was published in 2015 or 2016.
@leenaronalds4155 Darling Rose Gold came out in 2020. Query was most likely sent in 2019.
@VeraBrightfeather Yep. Good Me Bad Me came out in 2017. Darling Rose Gold came out in 2020. Query was more likely sent out in 2018 or 2019.
great episode! is it normal to start with the blurb first though?
That's one of the things I found so interesting about both of these examples - I often recommend putting your housekeeping information (genre, word count, etc.) first, but these both jump straight into the blurb. I think there are pros and cons to both formats. It just goes to show that one isn't necessarily "right" or "better" than the other.
This is super helpful as I am about to begin querying and already I can see a few things I hadn't considered in my approach and will now be implementing!
In regards to the synopsis, I am a little confused by these query letters and also your previous advice about not telling them everything about the story as most of the UK/children's agencies I've listed have asked to know everything in the synopsis and they stress 'including spoilers'. Do you have any thoughts on this?
I do suggest including spoilers in your synopsis document (but not in your query letter). Here's a video with some more synopsis do's and don'ts: ua-cam.com/video/GpCBuCH9Vwo/v-deo.html I hope that helps!
It must be a bit weird to be a literary agent and receive all these letters, apropos of nothing, saying:
"Dear Sir Bob Frankfurter,
Andy thought his life at the sandwich factory was everything until one day he turned into a duck.
Hi my name's Troy McClure and I just wrote a novel and need an agent. "
My point is: Surely, you should introduce yourself and the context of your message and THEN launch into your pitch? It seems really weird to start straight off with the pitch, without context.
Your advice is usually pretty good so I’m not knocking your comments on them but these two queries completely lost me. The first one is just a rip off of the gypsy rose Blanchard case. The second one, though not my style was a little more original, but it was a lot of words for nothing really going on. Both were boring sounding stories. It’s interesting that both contradict advice you’ve given before which made me concerned about how I was doing my queries (blurb first). After seeing these I don’t really know what I’m doing wrong. Mine are short and follow these pretty much exactly except mine don’t fall into easy categorized or commercial genres. I’d like to see examples from stories that are more fantasy and sci-fi or blended.
First
None of the authors or agents are male. Coincidence?