Thank you for this advice, I've been slowly finding out things to fix problems in my life like you mentioned in this video, but you definitely helped me understand what to do better. Thank you for this channel in general, you have helped me find and understand myself so much.
I'm both highly empathetic (HSP) and in the gifted range. I've tried very hard all my life and to this day to fit in but it has led me to inner emptiness. I would love for you to make a video about depression and boredom in correlation to giftedness. Xox
Yes, trying to fit in is definitely a bad strategy... I know it sounds like publicity, but have a look at my book "How to handle neurotypicals" bit.ly/neurotp, I put everything together there on how to "fit in" without overadapting or losing oneself... Thanks for the tip, noted!
Thanks to the boredom i practised drawing, the ironic thing is that now when i have to draw to a work for art school i'm bored or lazy xdddd, now intead of drawing i meditate when i'm bored, i don't get better at drawing but i enjoy my inner growth xddd, and for depression estoicism and things like the wim hof method hehe, sometimes we think too much so that kind of things are quite good to relax the mind....
The part where you said that it's as far away from a 70 IQ person to an average person as from an average person to an intellectually gifted one (let's say 130) really struck me. I never really thought of it in that way. Maybe my intelligence is also something I need to change my perception of and integrate in a more constructive manner. I think I have learned to "sweep it under the carpet," as you put it. Intelligence is probably one of the most socially desirable traits. I never wanted people to think I'm arrogant or boastful. I also felt as a kid that people could force me to do stuff I did not want to do, if they thought I was capable of doing it. Unconsciously I probably started believing in this maladaptation to some degree. I have watched several clips of yours and in each one I have found something of value. Thank you!
I'm not fully convinced by this claim. Namely the IQ scale seems to be forced into a bell curve, meaning that if there were another scale that's based on the people's capability to understand each other across the intelligence scale, the new scale IQ might break the normal distribution. Of course, the claim may still be true, or approximately true. But I don't think there's any evidence for it
I'm not sure either, lower IQ ranges are usually accompanied by detectable brain damage or abnormalities, it becomes more hazy what the actual differences are between high IQ or low IQ people, but it's not likely to be entirely similar to mentally handicapped versus normal brains, this kind of general intelligence, G factor, non-withstanding
I love this. I’ve come to similar conclusion after years of anxiety and depression. My autism diagnosis made me realize that’s I think entirely differently and am learning to accept it (and to protect myself)
I didn't begin to suspect I may be neurodivergent until currently at age 25. I have made friends with a few DIAGNOSED neurodivergent people who think I could be also. I remember thinking that I "didn't belong" as early as age 5. I just felt "alien" and like my peers around me knew some secret thing about interacting that I didn't. Even when I attempted to copy my peers and share their interests, it came off unnatural like I was playing "human" and not being. I've always been academically brilliant so it was frustrating that social norms that should be EASY and were easy for academically challenged people... However as an adult, recalling childhood things like telling my parents I could "hear" electricity or that certain clothing materials were itchy or burned my skin or that fluorescent lights make my head hurt and hearing multiple sounds at one time is frustrating and that I smile and nod alot because I don't hear what people are saying to me unless I focus really hard. Plus, my parents conceived me at an older age. Mom was 36, dad was 42. I female and ended up being left handed and my dad displays neurodivergent traits. I'm curious about evaluation but it's expensive
You are not alone, I can especially relate to the "it came off unnatural like I was playing "human" and not being", I have been diagnosed with autistic traits and intellectual giftedness and ADD so you may have similar diagnosis.
Thank you so much for taking the time to put this content out there. This is extremely therapeutic for me. It's like you just hit the nail on the head with regards to most of my problems in life. If I had known earlier that I was gifted, and what the social side effects would be it would probably have saved me alot of confusion. I struggle to meet relatives even, the really nice ones, they seem to talk about actions and sequences of events instead of philosophical abstract concepts.
Hi, I'm so glad it's helpful. In a sense, it's therapeutic for me too, of course. Maybe check out my books, there might be something there for you: amzn.to/3paQsmz
There's alot of good gifted material out there, I'd suggest checking out podcasts like Unleash Monday, the Podcaster Nadia has many great interviews with more good ones to follow I hope.
I am so happy to found your channel. Your just like me, the more I listen to you, the less I feel lonely, cuz I've only met once a person like us in real life. Just found you, have to watch all of your videos.
Thanks for creating and maintaining this channel Abel. I think most of the comment section is very enlightening and also your own ideas in your videos resonate with alot of us I think, so thank you
You're very welcome! Thanks for the kind comment. If you like the videos, check out my books, it's a whole other way of developing ideas and communicating, and I think there's a lot more density and style, if you want, in the books than in the videos. See my author page here: amzn.to/3paQsmz. Thanks again for your support by commenting!
To me, one of the most difficult things is that being "dumb" is so demonized and worshipped at the same time. If you claim that you're intellectually gifted, others see it as an offense because, to them, this means that you're calling them "dumb", and people don't like feeling inferior. You might face disdain and even aggression. I personally don't think I'm a genius, I'm only "gifted". I know people much smarter than me, but it always makes people mad to think that they themselves are not.. yet, if you ask them if they think they're gifted, they will quickly reply that they're not very smart. It's hard to understand neurotypicals without sounding really full of myself..
Yes, the arrogance trap. If you think of them as equal, it's a huge problem because you expect stuff from them they simply can't do. And if you think of them as "less" anything, they're mortally offended.btje answer is: different, neither better nor worse.😉
Dude if you are so smart you would have figured out bragging is a bad trait you might have not meant it to be perceived that way but that’s what NT automatically think when you bring that up and them saying they are not really smart is them just downplaying their abilities to nurture the common touch and deflect envy or just trying to be modest I will be honest most autistic people drive me nuts with their rigid mindset I have schizo autism so I have a more in depth understanding of normie psychology
I wouldnt consider myself exceptionally gifted in any way but I certainly do feel different and always have. What has always made me feel estranged is just how fucking regulated and samey ppl are. They all seem to be the collective voices of one mind. Its as though they engage in things that have already been concluded but still needed voiced. The idea of spontaneity, novelty, inspiration and abstraction coming from a persons mouth is so bizarre to them that I had to wonder what the fuck was actually going on in their heads. Its as though they only speak for reassurance, reinforcement of their state and to forge further their world view in the most simplest of terms as possible. I have likened my life to being on safari, just watching ppl go about their lives on a prescriptive, instructional manner, doing natures business for the human race. Its as though everyone was born with presets that initiate at certain points of their lives and they simply carry them out. I used to think ppl had their own sense of will that was different from the norm, their friends etc but I actually believe that its their friends, cultural norms, societal expectations that actually define them and not create some sense of opposition within them at all. Culture and norms are embedded in their very DNA, they are simply a human manifestation of the current culture and its the neurodivergent, which you pointed out very well, that actually drag a culture slowly into something new, something perhaps more enhanced. I think its this peripheral experience that allows us to lift a culture up, we say change only ever comes from the margins. Trouble is on the margins many ppl simply tap out, vacate, perhaps succumb to addiction, depression and other reactions to hopelessness like suicide etc. We cant get refuge in normality, in the mundane and systematic, theirs no comfort in regulation for us. Whats worse is the mental health aspect of our culture now. The dire reality is that the academic aspect to psychology IS FULL OF NEUROPTYICALS. They think they can approach this issue they way they would everything else such as fixing a car. They are still on 1+1 = 2 (maybe) in terms of the nature of the mind is any form of therapy. The reality is that neurodivergent ppl are the ones who posses first hand experience of what these mental issues are and Ive come to the conclusion that its we who have to solve it not by academia but by sheer analysis alone. Enjoy your video, keep up the work.
Hi abel im 24 and i struggle with the loud mouthed neurotypicals they really get under my skin, they think the world revolves around them and exhibit narcissistic traits
I am a Spanish boy of 14 years old. It can that I would be a stupid person with need to feel intelligent (more probably) but respect your video of school is hell I fell identified, and it s frustrating.
You're once again on point in this video. In my personal opinion, there, sadly, are quite a few psychologists who don't seem to understand that concept. In society we have to adapt to each other to cooperate with each other, or at least not get in each others way. In my experience how NT society sees that concept of cooperation is trying to mold NATs in NTs, which in my opinion is helping everyone involved to be worse of. Such things mainly happen when dealing with instetutions or in dependend interpersonal relationships. Well at least there is the internet now, a useful tool in finding people like oneself and also to help better understand people who are not.
14:34 I wish me from 7 years ago could hear this. I caused so much suffering for myself by trying to please everyone and mangle myself into what others wanted me to be.
Your Video on “my experience with intellectual giftedness” had really cool lighting where your eyes became bright grey almost. It kind of made it more mystical and all the more interesting at the same time. I think that’s what partially made the video so cool.....(just throwing out potential ideas out there for future videos ;)
Ok, thanks. I have no idea how I did that with the lighting though, I'm really sloppy on the technical side (as everyone has undoubtedly very much noted 🙂). But thanks for the feedback... It's true my eyes change between green and grey according to the light...
You got a new subscriber, it's really gratifying watching a channel about Aspies/HFA and gifted which don't says sh*t about themselves, and even claim we're wrong and need adaptation to an illogical, dysfunctional and perverse society.
Thank you for this video. I really appreciate it! That is better advice than I heard from my parents in 2 years. Although tempted not wanting to be naive, I am gonna trust that completely because my intuition somehow tells me that that is 100% correct which it very rarely does.
I subscribed, I also will buy your book, as I am really interested in what you talk about, and you seem like a very genuine person. I also relate to many things you’ve said about your early childhood, such as being almost isolated from everybody and caring for many things nobody else did. I also took an IQ test (at my hospital a long time ago) and like my father I scored high. Thank you for these videos, Abel. They’re helping lots of us.
The problem I have is that I really don't understand myself and not sure how to. People remark me as being weird or mysterious so I guess I have internalised it as well. My "problem" is that I can't make close relationships with people as I just have a general disinterst in others, although I can feign interest to make friends it's not genuine. I don't feel close to them or have any shared interest (being around people also just drains me and I love isolation). I'm also very introspective and spend lots of time zoning out thinking about life and my interests, as well as just being at peace. (I really value being content). Furthermore, I'm highly empathetic, I can almost imagine being in a person's situation and the exact emotions they're feeling. On the contrary, I'm not overly emotional and use music as a medium to feel. Life feels like going through the motions rather then an experience to me. Not sure what I want out of life or any direction to take.
Hi I’m 18 and I have adhd. My full scale iq is average, but I have very high verbal comprehension(top 8 percent) and high spatial reasoning(top 20 percent) but very low working memory and processing speed( bottom 9 percent). I can read book about quantum physics and understand it very easily but struggle to count past 50 in my head. I have always felt angry towards the universe for not giving me a super high iq. Which lead to suicide attempt. Because I love science and math but it can be so hard to perform the most basic concepts. In some ways I’m unfairly anger at you. It just seems so unfair to me that I have to work 10x harder than some people and get just good enough grades. Idk why I’m saying this. I guess I want you to say something to make me feel better I guess.
you might be ENTP or ENFP try being chaotic in life and adopt multiple interests that is pursuing polymathy you will get good kid.I had problems with multiplation till I was 23.Also look up myer Briggs test check your personality type.
It sounds like maybe you have dysgraphia. just a thought because with a learning disability you can be bright in many areas but because of the way your brain is wired math can be such a struggle. It’s just like Einstein’s iq is 160 and he is dyslexic, very bright but probably had a hard time reading or spelling it happens. nothing to be ashamed of.
1. It’s none of my business what other people think of me. 2. I’m powerless over everything except my own thoughts and actions. 3. Take responsibility for these. 4. If you don’t believe in a God of your own understanding, recommend you invent one and act as though there’s a God. Each morning have a plan for the day and then hand the results over to your deity. If your IQ is 136 and above you’ve probably noticed the meta patterns reoccurring through the our universe; the 32 examples of fine tuning, ( Dr Donald Hoffman UC Irvine - check Don out for a neuroscientific explanation that’ll help with the above.) Yes I know patience is hard when you know other people’s next 5 articulated thoughts during conversation.
Could you make a video on sexuality friendship and family and human connection? Is the feeling of detachment common? Is it common to feel belonging or uncommon for us?
I know this is kind of irrelevant but I’d like your opinion on this. I have Aspergers, but my empathy is a bit different. Usually someone with aspergers has low cognitive empathy and normal affective empathy. However for me, I’d say I’m sort of the opposite. I definitely have lapses in cognitive empathy but usually I can read faces like books, and generally I’m good at giving people advice to ease their emotional state because I understand what they are feeling. I don’t want to say I don’t have affective empathy, but it is definitely diminished. I usually don’t feel much when a loved one dies, or if someone is in some sort of pain. (Definitely to an extent though). Would you say this is normal/possible for aspergers? Thanks bro I’ve learned so much from your vids!
I’m the exact same way. Never been diagnosed with anything, but my mother always tells me she thinks I have aspergers. Super introverted, but I perform really well in social interaction. I don’t have a lot of friends, but I’m often well liked by people. I get upset when loved ones die, BUT I also know that everyone dies and the underlying great thing about life is that it ends. Therefore, it doesn’t put me into a state of depression like it does for the rest of my family. I think you and I could have Aspergers OR we are extremely logical, introverted, and above average in consciousness. This causes us to display signs of Aspergers, but due to our ability to analyze and pay attention we understand others emotions better (maybe better than our own.) I’m not psych major or anything so take this with a grain of salt lol. Let me know what you think.
As a survivor, who like a prodigal, went into the world to sample it all in a bid to test the limits of his morality, social mores, spiritual, financial and philosophical principles while earnestly attempting to create praxis from years of extreme experiences; in essence the journey was worth it. My High G mind allowed me to always get by and sometimes thrive in a meaningful way. I shall write down what helped me.
There are no superior and no inferior types, this reminds me of post modernism (I was reading about art history in university). If I remember correctly, modernism (art movement before post-modernism) was saying that there is only one type of right way, and post-modernism was opposing that.
There may be confounding variables in your journey of observing and accepting yourself. Our species functions best on a meat-based diet with fruit as the carbohydrate source. Illness of the body translates directly to the mind
What is the definition of a neurodivergent? I have seen people with high IQs with personality disorders who act very much like how you describe neurotypicals, I have seen people with low IQs but also have an abnormal or not typical psychological issue or disorder, it seems like you may be talking about higher levels of consciousness or psychological development
I feel like I'm neurodivergent and I can accept it, but currently I only know things that are not certain about myself, I'd like to know what really makes me feel in this way. thanks for this very interesting video.
My take on this: People with Asperger's syndrome, ASD tend to have higher IQ whereas people with ADHD have higher level of awareness of the different reality that extend beyond this realm (Birds-eye view of things). The former group is more in tune with the physical world, while the latter is out of tune.
I'm not trying to be offensive, but it has gotten popular "to be different" in past decades, and people get diagnosed as Aspergers or autistic (or like ADHD/ADD) too often imo... Not probably offensive. As though probably there are also many aspergers or autistic (aka - neurodivergent) people too. But it is just a little my sidethought, not much to do with the video theme, as it's very well put imo.
Hey I took multiple IQ tests online and got an IQ in the 120+ range and I'm an HSP ...I don't know why but I feel Iike my childhood development affected or inhibited the development of my supposed giftedness cause I am from a strict religious household where my curiosity and artistic nature was discouraged(North Korea type environment) . I am currently working on my emotional issues through psychotherapy cause I wasn't allowed to be who I was. I have glimpses of what it might be to be moderately gifted but I am not sure if its because of the very unnurting environment I grew up in. I feel maybe the cognitive tests don't test it. What do you think?
Well, yes, IQ tests are somewhat crap actually, they only measure how alike you are to the so-called intelligent people who devised them. It's a bit like monkey tricks, if you ask me. And very geared toward "masculine" (high-prenatal testosterone) brains. A lot of true intelligence is not captured in IQ tests.
Based on the title, gifted ppl actually are neurodivergent? It would be useful for me to know, since it's pissing me off to say that I'm gifted, when I have to justify some unusual behaviors
@@archeacnos Actual gifted people can have slighly above average to high IQ, this element is falsely used as an identifier of giftedness. A lot of specialists speak out against it but it benefits the industry to keep the tests running. I think Abel still subscribes to the official narrative of high IQ = gifted, but it is neither logical nor observable irl. As a matter of fact, I'm routinely surrounded by neurotypicals and narcissists who have a high IQ (some even took the official Mensa test) and they are not gifted.
Hello Abel! Young neuroatypical here, of which subtype? Yet to be discovered. Anyway, I love your explanations, they are crystal clear and very relatable. I have a question that perhaps could be touched upon in a following video; how did you find your people? How did you find others who you didnt have to constantly manage and translate from one mindset to another to?
Thank you for sharing! Your second question interests me a lot. I think you assumed a couple of things that may not be definitive. One, Abel was managed to surrounded himself with people in his niche. Two, for him to be able to communicate effectively with people outside of his niche, he has to adopt a different approach- a real difference taken place at a cognitive level.
I don’t thinking there’s a fundamental difference between him and anyone else to find people. In other words, I don’t think neurotypicals and non-neurotypicals have differences in ways of finding people.
Seems like you know about empathy on a personal level. I have something I am struggling to find an answer that please me because some cognitive bias that help neurotipicals dont work on me. Let me know if I can explain it to you, if you are not afraid to be pulled down into my abyss.
I have a significantly longer ring finger (on both of my hands) yet I'm still very artistic and not that good on systemizing as others. Is it possible i'm more on the middle part between being an empath and systemizer?
you can approach art through systemizing as you can many things theoretically. there is a lot of variation in how a mind works so that one person can systemize some kind of information but not other or depends on the context etc. you could also be systemizing unconsciously. empathy and systemizing build upon eachother in my understanding its just that different people understand different things differently. systemizing and empathizing work in the context of other cognitive functions which results in multiple manifestations. digit ratio correlates with (un)certain aspects of those cognitive realities which are also influenced by other factors implying that regarding one's cognition as more one or the other is redundant before you've defined their exact meaning and relationship with other ideas.
I have 1 question. I don't know if you have said this before in one of your videos or not but what exactly is the definition of a neurotypical, neuroatypical, neurodivergent. Etc.
Oh and the scenario where you lose everyone while describing something you find a simple concept but others don’t…. Yeah that ..,, never goes away. If you lose people while socializing, enthusiasm will get you through. If your a socially able ie a High T prenatal atypical then tell a joke against yourself.
I took the 2D4D ratio test and my ratio is 0.99 hence i am neurodivergent. My question is will it be okay if i pursue psychology as a subject to earn money for survival, will my divergent thinking help me gain a edge in this field and yes i am genuinely interested in human psyche. Please answer.
Boh, peu importe qui te le raconte, pourvu que quelqu'un te le raconte, n'est-ce pas. Il faut devenir son propre parent. (Abel Abelson, si tu vois ce que je veux dire ;) )
Hi Elise, it's something you can learn or grow towards to, a step at a time. It's actually nothing more or less than having a genuine, benevolent interest in the person you really are. Maybe that person is an emotionally or physically battered or ignored kid still suffering and trying to cope, at times it's someone elated, at times moody and jealous, and all of that is okay. That's seeing yourself how you really are. You can most certainly do that. Just give it a try, and if you fail, give it another try 🙂.
@@Abel.Abelson thanks. I know it’s not your field… but any idea why a highly empathetic child would also be highly aggressive towards certain nice people?
Do you think there's a possibility that neurodivergence is a result of some form of acute trauma, whether it's experienced while developing within the womb, and/or later on in life? It's a hunch I have that I haven't yet researched much. Some examples I can think of are Jason Padgett, Daniel Tammet saying he experienced epileptic seizures as a child, people who were struck by lightning opening up new abilities, etc. I'm guessing there's a high electrical charge that shocks or influences the nervous system that wakes up once dormant areas of the brain that remain dormant in the majority of the population. What do you think, and do you have any sources of information that might expand on this?
I'm into cause and effect, so neurodivergence is definitely the result of certain influences, and almost always, a mix of those: genetics, hormones (prenatal and postnatal), and "nurture" to some extent but far less than generally thought, in my opinion. I don't think the general population has dormant areas that can be woken up, really. But that's just my idea...
@@Abel.Abelson, cool. I saw your video on prenatal testosterone levels since that comment. Fantastic information. It's crazy, I had always prided myself on the notion that nurture far outweighed nature, even when the dialogue was that nature outweighed when I was younger. Living as long as I have, I see the grip of nature and how that plays out in my life. My hunch is, if the environment is controlled enough to meet a certain threshold, over some period of time, nurture, or epigenetic programming can significantly influence and fuse new adaptations and neurological patterns and even biology. One quick thing I can think of is changing the gut micro biome of an obese patient with that of transplanted stool samples of someone with a healthy gut micro biome and svelte figure. I just believe it's difficult for us that want to change certain characteristics are not able to put those controls within our environment as we'd like with any consistency and potency. Who knows...science changes all the time as we evolve. Thank you once again!
Have you experienced a phase where your mind perhaps loses touch with reality or perception of time, or it overcomplicates simple and well established concepts in life?
Yes, definitely. Regularly🙂. It's the flip side of characteristics like the ability to do ramified extrapolations toward the future including some probability calculations for each branch, an extreme capacity for relativation, rather low ego, etc . Once you know and accept you're like this (both sides of these characteristics) it's easy to handle them well however.
@@Abel.Abelson It's been a new encounter for me, and I feel it has been triggered due to serious anxiety. Simple tasks are starting to feel far too complicated. It feels like my mind can't accept that 1+1=2. It always has to question regardless; almost obsessively. I am not verified as a gifted individual (doubt my IQ is far from average) or neuro-divergent. However, I am still facing this issue. Any tips on this?
@@skully366 For me it is essential to have a safe haven of Truth I can absolutely trust in, in life (my faith), since I need coherence, logic, sense and purpose to be there in order to be mentally, emotionally and spiritually OK.
Laugh - Yeah my first request for God - if I get some "requests" lol - "Can I be really really stupid in my next life?" - I've often just sort of observed how much happier/content people are, and from my observation, they're just not high thinking/introspective types... - Overall, I just learned to be "content" alone most of the time doing my own thing; but - it's highly frustrating being mostly surrounded by individuals whom tend to care less about "the" truth and more about affirmation and emotional "feel good" ideologies...
Ow, that would clash very much with my introverted personality 🙂. But very kind of you. Maybe you could review a book of mine, it's like me, but less shy 😉. See if someone here would interest you, if it's for a review I can maybe arrange a copy for you... : amzn.to/3paQsmz
Imagine an alien or a human coming with an iq of 890 or something....our poor 133 iq would be really something quite little meaning indeed xdddd, well, i think i'm wrong, after all iq depends of the general "iq" of the population and the example that i purposed was not good at all, well you get the point xddd, i wonder what we could do with an 600 iq of our current society.....
I'm absolutely positive this is a video for me. You're making so much of my life become clear.
Fabulous! Thanks for letting me know!
Thank you for this advice, I've been slowly finding out things to fix problems in my life like you mentioned in this video, but you definitely helped me understand what to do better.
Thank you for this channel in general, you have helped me find and understand myself so much.
I'm both highly empathetic (HSP) and in the gifted range. I've tried very hard all my life and to this day to fit in but it has led me to inner emptiness. I would love for you to make a video about depression and boredom in correlation to giftedness. Xox
Yes, trying to fit in is definitely a bad strategy... I know it sounds like publicity, but have a look at my book "How to handle neurotypicals" bit.ly/neurotp, I put everything together there on how to "fit in" without overadapting or losing oneself... Thanks for the tip, noted!
Thanks to the boredom i practised drawing, the ironic thing is that now when i have to draw to a work for art school i'm bored or lazy xdddd, now intead of drawing i meditate when i'm bored, i don't get better at drawing but i enjoy my inner growth xddd, and for depression estoicism and things like the wim hof method hehe, sometimes we think too much so that kind of things are quite good to relax the mind....
I have a very hard time with neurotypicals. @@Abel.Abelson
Had I known this before as an anosmatic, neurodivergent biologist. But thanks to you I understand now that I am different and not alone.
I'm glad I could be of help! Thanks for letting me know! :)
The part where you said that it's as far away from a 70 IQ person to an average person as from an average person to an intellectually gifted one (let's say 130) really struck me. I never really thought of it in that way. Maybe my intelligence is also something I need to change my perception of and integrate in a more constructive manner. I think I have learned to "sweep it under the carpet," as you put it. Intelligence is probably one of the most socially desirable traits. I never wanted people to think I'm arrogant or boastful. I also felt as a kid that people could force me to do stuff I did not want to do, if they thought I was capable of doing it. Unconsciously I probably started believing in this maladaptation to some degree.
I have watched several clips of yours and in each one I have found something of value. Thank you!
I'm not fully convinced by this claim. Namely the IQ scale seems to be forced into a bell curve, meaning that if there were another scale that's based on the people's capability to understand each other across the intelligence scale, the new scale IQ might break the normal distribution.
Of course, the claim may still be true, or approximately true. But I don't think there's any evidence for it
I'm not sure either, lower IQ ranges are usually accompanied by detectable brain damage or abnormalities, it becomes more hazy what the actual differences are between high IQ or low IQ people, but it's not likely to be entirely similar to mentally handicapped versus normal brains, this kind of general intelligence, G factor, non-withstanding
Could you talk about romantic relationships and how you percieve your interactions were affected by being intellectually gifted?
Yes, good topic, noted.
I love this. I’ve come to similar conclusion after years of anxiety and depression. My autism diagnosis made me realize that’s I think entirely differently and am learning to accept it (and to protect myself)
I didn't begin to suspect I may be neurodivergent until currently at age 25. I have made friends with a few DIAGNOSED neurodivergent people who think I could be also. I remember thinking that I "didn't belong" as early as age 5. I just felt "alien" and like my peers around me knew some secret thing about interacting that I didn't. Even when I attempted to copy my peers and share their interests, it came off unnatural like I was playing "human" and not being. I've always been academically brilliant so it was frustrating that social norms that should be EASY and were easy for academically challenged people...
However as an adult, recalling childhood things like telling my parents I could "hear" electricity or that certain clothing materials were itchy or burned my skin or that fluorescent lights make my head hurt and hearing multiple sounds at one time is frustrating and that I smile and nod alot because I don't hear what people are saying to me unless I focus really hard.
Plus, my parents conceived me at an older age. Mom was 36, dad was 42. I female and ended up being left handed and my dad displays neurodivergent traits. I'm curious about evaluation but it's expensive
You are not alone, I can especially relate to the "it came off unnatural like I was playing "human" and not being", I have been diagnosed with autistic traits and intellectual giftedness and ADD so you may have similar diagnosis.
I agree. I consider "acceptance" as one, or the one greatest lesson in life.
Thank you so much for taking the time to put this content out there. This is extremely therapeutic for me. It's like you just hit the nail on the head with regards to most of my problems in life. If I had known earlier that I was gifted, and what the social side effects would be it would probably have saved me alot of confusion. I struggle to meet relatives even, the really nice ones, they seem to talk about actions and sequences of events instead of philosophical abstract concepts.
Hi, I'm so glad it's helpful. In a sense, it's therapeutic for me too, of course. Maybe check out my books, there might be something there for you: amzn.to/3paQsmz
There's alot of good gifted material out there, I'd suggest checking out podcasts like Unleash Monday, the Podcaster Nadia has many great interviews with more good ones to follow I hope.
Oh the relatives Meetings, I grew to even despise these occasions, it’s so boring with all of them...
Sounds very intense. Don't autistic people struggle with abstract concepts, like idioms, figures of speech and more usual expressions.
I am so happy to found your channel. Your just like me, the more I listen to you, the less I feel lonely, cuz I've only met once a person like us in real life. Just found you, have to watch all of your videos.
Thanks for creating and maintaining this channel Abel. I think most of the comment section is very enlightening and also your own ideas in your videos resonate with alot of us I think, so thank you
You're very welcome! Thanks for the kind comment. If you like the videos, check out my books, it's a whole other way of developing ideas and communicating, and I think there's a lot more density and style, if you want, in the books than in the videos. See my author page here: amzn.to/3paQsmz. Thanks again for your support by commenting!
To me, one of the most difficult things is that being "dumb" is so demonized and worshipped at the same time. If you claim that you're intellectually gifted, others see it as an offense because, to them, this means that you're calling them "dumb", and people don't like feeling inferior. You might face disdain and even aggression.
I personally don't think I'm a genius, I'm only "gifted". I know people much smarter than me, but it always makes people mad to think that they themselves are not.. yet, if you ask them if they think they're gifted, they will quickly reply that they're not very smart. It's hard to understand neurotypicals without sounding really full of myself..
Yes, the arrogance trap. If you think of them as equal, it's a huge problem because you expect stuff from them they simply can't do. And if you think of them as "less" anything, they're mortally offended.btje answer is: different, neither better nor worse.😉
Dude if you are so smart you would have figured out bragging is a bad trait you might have not meant it to be perceived that way but that’s what NT automatically think when you bring that up and them saying they are not really smart is them just downplaying their abilities to nurture the common touch and deflect envy or just trying to be modest I will be honest most autistic people drive me nuts with their rigid mindset I have schizo autism so I have a more in depth understanding of normie psychology
I wouldnt consider myself exceptionally gifted in any way but I certainly do feel different and always have. What has always made me feel estranged is just how fucking regulated and samey ppl are. They all seem to be the collective voices of one mind. Its as though they engage in things that have already been concluded but still needed voiced. The idea of spontaneity, novelty, inspiration and abstraction coming from a persons mouth is so bizarre to them that I had to wonder what the fuck was actually going on in their heads. Its as though they only speak for reassurance, reinforcement of their state and to forge further their world view in the most simplest of terms as possible.
I have likened my life to being on safari, just watching ppl go about their lives on a prescriptive, instructional manner, doing natures business for the human race. Its as though everyone was born with presets that initiate at certain points of their lives and they simply carry them out. I used to think ppl had their own sense of will that was different from the norm, their friends etc but I actually believe that its their friends, cultural norms, societal expectations that actually define them and not create some sense of opposition within them at all. Culture and norms are embedded in their very DNA, they are simply a human manifestation of the current culture and its the neurodivergent, which you pointed out very well, that actually drag a culture slowly into something new, something perhaps more enhanced. I think its this peripheral experience that allows us to lift a culture up, we say change only ever comes from the margins. Trouble is on the margins many ppl simply tap out, vacate, perhaps succumb to addiction, depression and other reactions to hopelessness like suicide etc. We cant get refuge in normality, in the mundane and systematic, theirs no comfort in regulation for us.
Whats worse is the mental health aspect of our culture now. The dire reality is that the academic aspect to psychology IS FULL OF NEUROPTYICALS. They think they can approach this issue they way they would everything else such as fixing a car. They are still on 1+1 = 2 (maybe) in terms of the nature of the mind is any form of therapy. The reality is that neurodivergent ppl are the ones who posses first hand experience of what these mental issues are and Ive come to the conclusion that its we who have to solve it not by academia but by sheer analysis alone.
Enjoy your video, keep up the work.
Great video. The internet has made my life less lonely. It is my best friend. Every idea I can imagine is in there.
This channel saved my life
Glad I could be of help :) Check out my books too, they might interest you: amzn.to/3paQsmz
Hi abel im 24 and i struggle with the loud mouthed neurotypicals they really get under my skin, they think the world revolves around them and exhibit narcissistic traits
I am a Spanish boy of 14 years old. It can that I would be a stupid person with need to feel intelligent (more probably) but respect your video of school is hell I fell identified, and it s frustrating.
You're once again on point in this video. In my personal opinion, there, sadly, are quite a few psychologists who don't seem to understand that concept. In society we have to adapt to each other to cooperate with each other, or at least not get in each others way. In my experience how NT society sees that concept of cooperation is trying to mold NATs in NTs, which in my opinion is helping everyone involved to be worse of. Such things mainly happen when dealing with instetutions or in dependend interpersonal relationships. Well at least there is the internet now, a useful tool in finding people like oneself and also to help better understand people who are not.
14:34 I wish me from 7 years ago could hear this. I caused so much suffering for myself by trying to please everyone and mangle myself into what others wanted me to be.
Your Video on “my experience with intellectual giftedness” had really cool lighting where your eyes became bright grey almost. It kind of made it more mystical and all the more interesting at the same time. I think that’s what partially made the video so cool.....(just throwing out potential ideas out there for future videos ;)
Ok, thanks. I have no idea how I did that with the lighting though, I'm really sloppy on the technical side (as everyone has undoubtedly very much noted 🙂). But thanks for the feedback... It's true my eyes change between green and grey according to the light...
merci Abel pour ce que vous faites ! j'ai lu "How to handle neurotypicals" pleins de sagesse, cela va changer ma vie !!
Génial, merci! (N'oublie pas de laisser une évaluation où tu as acheté le livre stp!!!)
thank-you for the help/advice A.A, they are driving me mad sometimes.
You got a new subscriber, it's really gratifying watching a channel about Aspies/HFA and gifted which don't says sh*t about themselves, and even claim we're wrong and need adaptation to an illogical, dysfunctional and perverse society.
Thank you for this video. I really appreciate it! That is better advice than I heard from my parents in 2 years. Although tempted not wanting to be naive, I am gonna trust that completely because my intuition somehow tells me that that is 100% correct which it very rarely does.
I subscribed, I also will buy your book, as I am really interested in what you talk about, and you seem like a very genuine person. I also relate to many things you’ve said about your early childhood, such as being almost isolated from everybody and caring for many things nobody else did. I also took an IQ test (at my hospital a long time ago) and like my father I scored high.
Thank you for these videos, Abel. They’re helping lots of us.
You're welcome :) Thanks for letting me know :)
Keep making videos Abel - Quality content with substance and synthesis of information that's already out there. Thanks man
The problem I have is that I really don't understand myself and not sure how to. People remark me as being weird or
mysterious so I guess I have internalised it as well. My "problem" is that I can't make close relationships with people as I just have a general disinterst in others, although I can feign interest to make friends it's not genuine. I don't feel close to them or have any shared interest (being around people also just drains me and I love isolation). I'm also very introspective and spend lots of time zoning out thinking about life and my interests, as well as just being at peace. (I really value being content). Furthermore, I'm highly empathetic, I can almost imagine being in a person's situation and the exact emotions they're feeling. On the contrary, I'm not overly emotional and use music as a medium to feel. Life feels like going through the motions rather then an experience to me. Not sure what I want out of life or any direction to take.
Hi I’m 18 and I have adhd. My full scale iq is average, but I have very high verbal comprehension(top 8 percent) and high spatial reasoning(top 20 percent) but very low working memory and processing speed( bottom 9 percent). I can read book about quantum physics and understand it very easily but struggle to count past 50 in my head. I have always felt angry towards the universe for not giving me a super high iq. Which lead to suicide attempt. Because I love science and math but it can be so hard to perform the most basic concepts. In some ways I’m unfairly anger at you. It just seems so unfair to me that I have to work 10x harder than some people and get just good enough grades. Idk why I’m saying this. I guess I want you to say something to make me feel better I guess.
Use the pomodoro method to retrain your memory. Switch to a ketogenic diet and find techniques to raise your BDNF.
you might be ENTP or ENFP try being chaotic in life and adopt multiple interests that is pursuing polymathy you will get good kid.I had problems with multiplation till I was 23.Also look up myer Briggs test check your personality type.
It sounds like maybe you have dysgraphia. just a thought because with a learning disability you can be bright in many areas but because of the way your brain is wired math can be such a struggle. It’s just like Einstein’s iq is 160 and he is dyslexic, very bright but probably had a hard time reading or spelling it happens. nothing to be ashamed of.
1. It’s none of my business what other people think of me. 2. I’m powerless over everything except my own thoughts and actions. 3. Take responsibility for these. 4. If you don’t believe in a God of your own understanding, recommend you invent one and act as though there’s a God. Each morning have a plan for the day and then hand the results over to your deity. If your IQ is 136 and above you’ve probably noticed the meta patterns reoccurring through the our universe; the 32 examples of fine tuning, ( Dr Donald Hoffman UC Irvine - check Don out for a neuroscientific explanation that’ll help with the above.) Yes I know patience is hard when you know other people’s next 5 articulated thoughts during conversation.
Lonely AF. Gifted.
Could you make a video on sexuality friendship and family and human connection? Is the feeling of detachment common? Is it common to feel belonging or uncommon for us?
Noted, I'll see what I can do...
Absolutely
I feel detached from others most of the time
@@globuspallidus2457 me too
I know this is kind of irrelevant but I’d like your opinion on this. I have Aspergers, but my empathy is a bit different. Usually someone with aspergers has low cognitive empathy and normal affective empathy. However for me, I’d say I’m sort of the opposite. I definitely have lapses in cognitive empathy but usually I can read faces like books, and generally I’m good at giving people advice to ease their emotional state because I understand what they are feeling. I don’t want to say I don’t have affective empathy, but it is definitely diminished. I usually don’t feel much when a loved one dies, or if someone is in some sort of pain. (Definitely to an extent though). Would you say this is normal/possible for aspergers? Thanks bro I’ve learned so much from your vids!
I’m the exact same way. Never been diagnosed with anything, but my mother always tells me she thinks I have aspergers. Super introverted, but I perform really well in social interaction. I don’t have a lot of friends, but I’m often well liked by people. I get upset when loved ones die, BUT I also know that everyone dies and the underlying great thing about life is that it ends. Therefore, it doesn’t put me into a state of depression like it does for the rest of my family.
I think you and I could have Aspergers
OR we are extremely logical, introverted, and above average in consciousness. This causes us to display signs of Aspergers, but due to our ability to analyze and pay attention we understand others emotions better (maybe better than our own.)
I’m not psych major or anything so take this with a grain of salt lol. Let me know what you think.
Just re-read that you said you do indeed have Aspergers. My bad.
Can you make a video about how to overcome procrastination
Yes, not a bad topic, noted.
Up
As a survivor, who like a prodigal, went into the world to sample it all in a bid to test the limits of his morality, social mores, spiritual, financial and philosophical principles while earnestly attempting to create praxis from years of extreme experiences; in essence the journey was worth it. My High G mind allowed me to always get by and sometimes thrive in a meaningful way. I shall write down what helped me.
There are no superior and no inferior types, this reminds me of post modernism (I was reading about art history in university). If I remember correctly, modernism (art movement before post-modernism) was saying that there is only one type of right way, and post-modernism was opposing that.
There may be confounding variables in your journey of observing and accepting yourself. Our species functions best on a meat-based diet with fruit as the carbohydrate source. Illness of the body translates directly to the mind
Once you understand that your intellect is a tool then you can start to find ways to use it to create a better life.
I don't think I am perfect the way I am. I have a lot of tension in my body accrued throughout my unconscious life in distress and restriction.
What is the definition of a neurodivergent? I have seen people with high IQs with personality disorders who act very much like how you describe neurotypicals, I have seen people with low IQs but also have an abnormal or not typical psychological issue or disorder, it seems like you may be talking about higher levels of consciousness or psychological development
I feel like I'm neurodivergent and I can accept it, but currently I only know things that are not certain about myself, I'd like to know what really makes me feel in this way. thanks for this very interesting video.
You're welcome, thanks for letting me know :) Check out my books also, they might be of help: amzn.to/3paQsmz
@@Abel.Abelson sure I will check 🙌😳
My take on this:
People with Asperger's syndrome, ASD tend to have higher IQ whereas people with ADHD have higher level of awareness of the different reality that extend beyond this realm (Birds-eye view of things). The former group is more in tune with the physical world, while the latter is out of tune.
Thank you so much 🖤
Great advice
You're welcome. Thank you :)
this is gold
I'm not trying to be offensive, but it has gotten popular "to be different" in past decades, and people get diagnosed as Aspergers or autistic (or like ADHD/ADD) too often imo...
Not probably offensive.
As though probably there are also many aspergers or autistic (aka - neurodivergent) people too.
But it is just a little my sidethought, not much to do with the video theme, as it's very well put imo.
Yes, there's also that. There are exaggerations both ways, I definitely agree on that.
So? Is that a good or bad thing to you? Why the offensive disclaimer?
@@mariempavon2916 I have no answer to that. I have just started doubting about things...
Thank you for this!
Hey I took multiple IQ tests online and got an IQ in the 120+ range and I'm an HSP ...I don't know why but I feel Iike my childhood development affected or inhibited the development of my supposed giftedness cause I am from a strict religious household where my curiosity and artistic nature was discouraged(North Korea type environment) . I am currently working on my emotional issues through psychotherapy cause I wasn't allowed to be who I was. I have glimpses of what it might be to be moderately gifted but I am not sure if its because of the very unnurting environment I grew up in. I feel maybe the cognitive tests don't test it. What do you think?
Well, yes, IQ tests are somewhat crap actually, they only measure how alike you are to the so-called intelligent people who devised them. It's a bit like monkey tricks, if you ask me. And very geared toward "masculine" (high-prenatal testosterone) brains. A lot of true intelligence is not captured in IQ tests.
@@Abel.Abelson That's true. And it's usually NTs who over-rely on IQ tests and scores.
Based on the title, gifted ppl actually are neurodivergent? It would be useful for me to know, since it's pissing me off to say that I'm gifted, when I have to justify some unusual behaviors
Yes they are ND. But it's not about IQ, since anyone can have a high IQ, NTs included.
@@timefortee so what is it about?
@@archeacnos Actual gifted people can have slighly above average to high IQ, this element is falsely used as an identifier of giftedness. A lot of specialists speak out against it but it benefits the industry to keep the tests running. I think Abel still subscribes to the official narrative of high IQ = gifted, but it is neither logical nor observable irl. As a matter of fact, I'm routinely surrounded by neurotypicals and narcissists who have a high IQ (some even took the official Mensa test) and they are not gifted.
Please start a discord server for your subscribers so that we can connect as a community and make friends!! 🙏
I just hope you are feeling well
Hello Abel! Young neuroatypical here, of which subtype? Yet to be discovered. Anyway, I love your explanations, they are crystal clear and very relatable. I have a question that perhaps could be touched upon in a following video; how did you find your people? How did you find others who you didnt have to constantly manage and translate from one mindset to another to?
Yes, good subject, noted! Thanks!
Thank you for sharing! Your second question interests me a lot. I think you assumed a couple of things that may not be definitive. One, Abel was managed to surrounded himself with people in his niche. Two, for him to be able to communicate effectively with people outside of his niche, he has to adopt a different approach- a real difference taken place at a cognitive level.
I don’t thinking there’s a fundamental difference between him and anyone else to find people. In other words, I don’t think neurotypicals and non-neurotypicals have differences in ways of finding people.
Do Neurodivergent People tend to be called Weird a lot?
Seems like you know about empathy on a personal level. I have something I am struggling to find an answer that please me because some cognitive bias that help neurotipicals dont work on me.
Let me know if I can explain it to you, if you are not afraid to be pulled down into my abyss.
Try me
I have a significantly longer ring finger (on both of my hands) yet I'm still very artistic and not that good on systemizing as others. Is it possible i'm more on the middle part between being an empath and systemizer?
you can approach art through systemizing as you can many things theoretically. there is a lot of variation in how a mind works so that one person can systemize some kind of information but not other or depends on the context etc. you could also be systemizing unconsciously. empathy and systemizing build upon eachother in my understanding its just that different people understand different things differently. systemizing and empathizing work in the context of other cognitive functions which results in multiple manifestations. digit ratio correlates with (un)certain aspects of those cognitive realities which are also influenced by other factors implying that regarding one's cognition as more one or the other is redundant before you've defined their exact meaning and relationship with other ideas.
I have 1 question. I don't know if you have said this before in one of your videos or not but what exactly is the definition of a neurotypical, neuroatypical, neurodivergent. Etc.
Oh and the scenario where you lose everyone while describing something you find a simple concept but others don’t…. Yeah that ..,, never goes away. If you lose people while socializing, enthusiasm will get you through. If your a socially able ie a High T prenatal atypical then tell a joke against yourself.
I took the 2D4D ratio test and my ratio is 0.99 hence i am neurodivergent. My question is will it be okay if i pursue psychology as a subject to earn money for survival, will my divergent thinking help me gain a edge in this field and yes i am genuinely interested in human psyche.
Please answer.
ooooh j'aurais voulu que mes parents me racontent tout ça ^_^
Boh, peu importe qui te le raconte, pourvu que quelqu'un te le raconte, n'est-ce pas. Il faut devenir son propre parent. (Abel Abelson, si tu vois ce que je veux dire ;) )
@@Abel.Abelson hihi Oui c'est le cas de le dire. Juste que j'aurais voulu le savoir plus tôt ! Enfin bon, 39 ans ça va encore. Merci...
I really have no idea how to “see myself how I am”. That feels unattainable for me
Hi Elise, it's something you can learn or grow towards to, a step at a time. It's actually nothing more or less than having a genuine, benevolent interest in the person you really are. Maybe that person is an emotionally or physically battered or ignored kid still suffering and trying to cope, at times it's someone elated, at times moody and jealous, and all of that is okay. That's seeing yourself how you really are. You can most certainly do that. Just give it a try, and if you fail, give it another try 🙂.
@@Abel.Abelson thanks. I know it’s not your field… but any idea why a highly empathetic child would also be highly aggressive towards certain nice people?
You look like 60% house from house.md and 40% i wanna say..sheldon cooper from the big bang theory? Idk im probably wrong
Hehhe he does
And here I am wondering why doctor House is exceptionally calm and not in a yelling mode 😂
17:45excellent point
Others: You know I'm not psychic 🤨 me: I know I'm psychic, but you still have to tell me what you want.
Do you think there's a possibility that neurodivergence is a result of some form of acute trauma, whether it's experienced while developing within the womb, and/or later on in life? It's a hunch I have that I haven't yet researched much. Some examples I can think of are Jason Padgett, Daniel Tammet saying he experienced epileptic seizures as a child, people who were struck by lightning opening up new abilities, etc. I'm guessing there's a high electrical charge that shocks or influences the nervous system that wakes up once dormant areas of the brain that remain dormant in the majority of the population. What do you think, and do you have any sources of information that might expand on this?
I'm into cause and effect, so neurodivergence is definitely the result of certain influences, and almost always, a mix of those: genetics, hormones (prenatal and postnatal), and "nurture" to some extent but far less than generally thought, in my opinion. I don't think the general population has dormant areas that can be woken up, really. But that's just my idea...
@@Abel.Abelson, cool. I saw your video on prenatal testosterone levels since that comment. Fantastic information. It's crazy, I had always prided myself on the notion that nurture far outweighed nature, even when the dialogue was that nature outweighed when I was younger. Living as long as I have, I see the grip of nature and how that plays out in my life. My hunch is, if the environment is controlled enough to meet a certain threshold, over some period of time, nurture, or epigenetic programming can significantly influence and fuse new adaptations and neurological patterns and even biology. One quick thing I can think of is changing the gut micro biome of an obese patient with that of transplanted stool samples of someone with a healthy gut micro biome and svelte figure. I just believe it's difficult for us that want to change certain characteristics are not able to put those controls within our environment as we'd like with any consistency and potency. Who knows...science changes all the time as we evolve. Thank you once again!
How do I actually find out my IQ? I've tried several tests and got a range of nearly 30 IQ, should I just take the average of those?
Consider the scores of the most reliable tests. Do not consider the short online ones reliable because they generally use a smaller sample size.
How True!
Have you experienced a phase where your mind perhaps loses touch with reality or perception of time, or it overcomplicates simple and well established concepts in life?
Yes, definitely. Regularly🙂. It's the flip side of characteristics like the ability to do ramified extrapolations toward the future including some probability calculations for each branch, an extreme capacity for relativation, rather low ego, etc . Once you know and accept you're like this (both sides of these characteristics) it's easy to handle them well however.
@@Abel.Abelson It's been a new encounter for me, and I feel it has been triggered due to serious anxiety. Simple tasks are starting to feel far too complicated. It feels like my mind can't accept that 1+1=2. It always has to question regardless; almost obsessively. I am not verified as a gifted individual (doubt my IQ is far from average) or neuro-divergent. However, I am still facing this issue. Any tips on this?
@@skully366 For me it is essential to have a safe haven of Truth I can absolutely trust in, in life (my faith), since I need coherence, logic, sense and purpose to be there in order to be mentally, emotionally and spiritually OK.
Laugh - Yeah my first request for God - if I get some "requests" lol - "Can I be really really stupid in my next life?" - I've often just sort of observed how much happier/content people are, and from my observation, they're just not high thinking/introspective types... - Overall, I just learned to be "content" alone most of the time doing my own thing; but - it's highly frustrating being mostly surrounded by individuals whom tend to care less about "the" truth and more about affirmation and emotional "feel good" ideologies...
We should connect bro! Would love to interview you on my channel!
Ow, that would clash very much with my introverted personality 🙂. But very kind of you. Maybe you could review a book of mine, it's like me, but less shy 😉. See if someone here would interest you, if it's for a review I can maybe arrange a copy for you... : amzn.to/3paQsmz
Algorithm comment
Imagine an alien or a human coming with an iq of 890 or something....our poor 133 iq would be really something quite little meaning indeed xdddd, well, i think i'm wrong, after all iq depends of the general "iq" of the population and the example that i purposed was not good at all, well you get the point xddd, i wonder what we could do with an 600 iq of our current society.....
👍👍👍
❤️
We need more content abel! Greetings Lisa bode < lost my UA-cam account!
Thanks Lisa, that's really kind of you. I'm fighting a few other battles here and there, but when I can I will add here.
@@Abel.Abelson Bon courage!!