This was such a great topic to discuss. It really is so hard to change my mindset from only allowing myself what I need to survive, to allowing myself the things that I need in order to thrive. And it’s been so hard to learn how to recognize the emotional manipulation of all those church lessons that made us feel like we had to be “true to the faith that our parents have cherished, true to the truth for which martyrs have perished” because they gave up their life (or at least their quality of life) so now we have to stick with *their* plan for our lives. I can’t wait to do the next part together!
Check out the work of Emily and Amelia Nagoski about burnout. They have a Ted talk and Amelia has UA-cam channel called Autistic Burnout. Really is helping me rethink how I deal with the big "B" word. The cure for Burnout is not self care - it is caring for each other. You two are great examples of helping each other to look after yourself. Hugs
Give up everything for everyone else, but do it with integrity, virtue, pleasant attitude and perspective. Anxiety or depression is your fault, because you should do these things to not be punished with anxiety and depression. I felt like I had high functioning anxiety and depression from the time I was 8.
Actually, I disagree. I don't think you should give up everything. I think you can sacrifice a lot as a mom but that you shouldn't give up all of yourself because you deserve to live a happy life too.
So this is NOT what the gospel of Christ teaches---it is a cultural thing. Being a parent is the most noble thing anyone can do since none of us would be here without them and certainly being a good parent is important but some people have the wrong idea of what it means to be a good parent. The mother and father's needs are just as important as the children's needs. I know that Heavenly Father cares about my personal happiness just as much as my kids and He has helped me find a way to balance it all. There are studies that show that if mothers are away from their children for more than 30 hours a week then the mental health of their children suffers but under that is fine and this would also be ideal for fathers! There is also a talk mentioning that you should not draw from an empty cup. Yes life is unpleasant at times for everyone but it's about balance.
This was such a great topic to discuss. It really is so hard to change my mindset from only allowing myself what I need to survive, to allowing myself the things that I need in order to thrive. And it’s been so hard to learn how to recognize the emotional manipulation of all those church lessons that made us feel like we had to be “true to the faith that our parents have cherished, true to the truth for which martyrs have perished” because they gave up their life (or at least their quality of life) so now we have to stick with *their* plan for our lives.
I can’t wait to do the next part together!
Check out the work of Emily and Amelia Nagoski about burnout. They have a Ted talk and Amelia has UA-cam channel called Autistic Burnout. Really is helping me rethink how I deal with the big "B" word. The cure for Burnout is not self care - it is caring for each other. You two are great examples of helping each other to look after yourself. Hugs
Thanks!
good presentation , as always .
Give up everything for everyone else, but do it with integrity, virtue, pleasant attitude and perspective. Anxiety or depression is your fault, because you should do these things to not be punished with anxiety and depression. I felt like I had high functioning anxiety and depression from the time I was 8.
Actually, I disagree. I don't think you should give up everything. I think you can sacrifice a lot as a mom but that you shouldn't give up all of yourself because you deserve to live a happy life too.
So this is NOT what the gospel of Christ teaches---it is a cultural thing. Being a parent is the most noble thing anyone can do since none of us would be here without them and certainly being a good parent is important but some people have the wrong idea of what it means to be a good parent. The mother and father's needs are just as important as the children's needs. I know that Heavenly Father cares about my personal happiness just as much as my kids and He has helped me find a way to balance it all. There are studies that show that if mothers are away from their children for more than 30 hours a week then the mental health of their children suffers but under that is fine and this would also be ideal for fathers! There is also a talk mentioning that you should not draw from an empty cup. Yes life is unpleasant at times for everyone but it's about balance.