@@shadowflash2392 Kya is actually a fusion of Kyle and Nin I think Kya said it somewhere at the start of the video but Kya is basically just Kyle and Nin as one
It's so bizarre seeing your past lives & see you, Kya. Weird to think 4 people who had varying opinions of eachother came together to survive. It's like seeing the same canvas get re-painted again.
@@DissociaDID Ain't it? Like maybe whatever was originally painted on that canvas can still be seen if you look close enough - but standing far away its something new; something beautiful. It's art at its finest!
For me personally, Kyle never came across as JUST the lovable goof. I think in his Meet The Alters Video, he talked a bit about how his role as protector came to be. Ever since learning that, I've had a great deal of respect for him, cause none of us would've ever been able to tell from a few videos what tremendous amounts of responsibility he had to take on, and what challenges he surely had to face. I've always remembered him as a sweet goofball, but never without the respect for what he was and what he stood for.
Let me know if this is not okay to say! I'll delete this comment. Kyle was an absolute GEM. One of my most favorite people on the internet and still is. It's so good to see glimpses of him in Kya. I appreciate this reaction so much and it's making my world feel like a better place.
Kyle!! Shout out to the part of you Kya who was such a pillar of protection and strength and vulnerability in the system 💛🧡💜 You’re the most beautiful people and person Kya and I’m so happy to know you through the internet.
Kyle was (and still is) so well loved and respected. I remember watching this video and others where he fronted and just feeling that as much as Kyle's charm and sense of humor was a necessary part of his job, we were all so lucky that he took the time to use his gifts to make us smile too. We remember.
I really miss him in such an odd way. I know he's there, but also not quite, and it's truly curious to experience. He showed care to all of us in such a firm and heartfelt way
We empathize with the "missing who we were" thing. Our partner proposed to one of the alters from well before we were diagnosed. That part of us either fusing or going dormant literally was part of the reason we even sought psychiatric help in the first place. We still shed tears over the fact that we don't feel that same level of connection or affection that we allegedly used to show. We just don't remember it, and it doesn't feel like anyone who primarily is out these days. It breaks our heart sometimes. And we know it's hard on our partner. Anyway, sorry for the ramble. All that to say, we totally understand that bittersweet feeling. It's wild to see how far you've come re: production and healing. Sending healing, good vibes, and lots of love. All the very best. -Valda
It was really cool and heartwarming hearing Kya's voice slowly start sounding more and more like Kyle's, and Kyle's accent really coming out. As much as I think we all miss Kyle, I think everyone here can agree that Kya is what this system needed, and they are so strong; we're all so proud of how far you've all come💕
21:39 I remember that. Nina was describing herself physically and mentioning her skin colour wasn't as pale as the body, because the body was "atrociously pale" 😂😂😂 That's when Chloe wrote "thanks, Nina"
I feel like this quote sums it up the best: “We all change, when you think about it. We’re all different people all through our lives. And that’s OK, that’s good, you gotta keep moving, so long as you remember all the people that you used to be.”
I’ve been watching this channel since 2018 with Chloe when the dissociaDID channel first started. Just wanted to say thank you. You’ve helped me tremendously with my own c-ptsd and understanding my trauma. I recently had a massive panic attack while being out in public, and I was able to come out of it by remembering your panic attack videos and grounding videos. I’m very thankful for your system ❤.
We came over to comment exactly this. It's so good to hear Kyle's voice come back through Kya, even just in a little way like this. Such a good reminder that even when we integrate, everyone we were before are never truly "gone."
Kyle was a soldier, and we could see that. Yes, he was funny and goofy, but I and many littles felt so safe with him (through like videos and things obviously) because there was a side to him that screamed “I will protect you no matter what.” I have nothing but respect for that man.
Kyle further gained my respect when he went on cam to announce that you were taking time off because of the online issues you had with another UA-camr. I saw how upset and protective he was and I just knew that he will make sure that all of you will stay safe and healthy.
Kyle comes forth during the reaction video. It's like he never left.. the accent, the attitude, the masculine voice - and at the end it melts back into Kya. It's fascinating to watch and listen.
Wow 5 years. 2018 seems like such a time ago. These have been some long 5 years man but we all made it trough it. Give yourselves a pat on the back for still going strong after 5 years. Love you Kya and your system. One last thing Kyles makeup video to this day is still my go to video if i need to have a laugh as Kyle always cheered me up on those darker days. Lots of love guys and to you all who have been here these last 5 years.
The way Kaya alternates between referring to Kyle in the first and the third person is actually so relatable and perfectly reflects the confusion of fusing. I describe it as a space shuttle that detaches as it goes higher up because some parts are just discarded and no longer feel part of the whole anymore
Hearing "Chloe used to love that" makes me a bit nostalgic. I was watching since Chloe was still host. At this point it's not something I'm always super concious of but remember since Nin. But every time hearing her name I'm like aw, yeah, Chloe. Super proud of how far y'all have gone since those days
Help, Kyle putting on makeup, even without amazing quality and light, is PRICELESS. I feel bad, but I was also wheezing, I was laughing so hard. 💀 - Luna and Jace Congrats on the sponsorship! All support going your way! -Cora💜
Its so interesting because you can almost see the split in kya, like when theyre almost like nin, she refers almost to kyle, “him, he, kyle” and when theyre almost like kyle he refers to himself, “me, myself, I”
Ahh I'm really glad, was genuinely impressed too! And thank you sm! Every sponsor will help us afford the case but we would only ever work with ones we really believe in ❤️
@@DissociaDIDwe've actually been searching for a good vpn for a long time but we aren't great with technology stuff. We are gonna give this one a try!
I remember watching this back then wow, this is brings me a while back mentally speaking. So proud of everything you guys have achieved and your growth :)
Is it weird that I got so excited about the VPN ad? Like, yall have had such hard fucking time with your mental health and harassment and stuff, but every now and then some good stuff happens, and now you're getting paid a sponsorship for your content. It's WELL fucking deserved. Dunno if this is yall's first sponsor or if I've just never seen one before, but I hope there's many more to come. Thanks Atlas VPN for sponsoring DissociaDID
Oh my this is nostalgia. We remember when that video came out. Your channel has been very helpful for us and our system. We are going through a lot in life rn including abrupt job change and a lot of stressors so we are very appreciative that y’all are posting more again. We watch y’all to help with the anxiety and stress. Good health to y’all!
We personally never saw Kyle as just a goof. He was like an older brother, the father figure of the friend group that is your system. If other alters laughed at the banana story, it wasn't because you were laughable, it was because you had given them the space to be able to laugh. -Billie, emotional protector, Fenix system
I felt like I heard Kyle's voice about 90% of the time as Kya spoke in this vid. I miss Kyle as well but hearing Kyle in Kya's voice is comforting. Love to you All ❤
Kyle had such a quietly intense energy, and I think anyone who watched more than just a few videos could sense his deeply protective nature. I love it when I can see that same energy in Kya. LOTS OF LOVE!!!!
THIS IS SO IRONIC-- a WEEK ago when I was binging all your videos I missed (I watch in batches), I randomly decided to go back and rewatch Kyle's makeup video too. THAT BOY, I SWEAR. I loved the bit where you described what witnessing muscle memory from the inside is like, how Kyle watched Chloe do the makeup and thought it was supposed to be all slapdash because she was just so proficient. It makes perfect sense!!!!! It's so genuinely fascinating to learn the nuances of how DID works from an internal source-- 100% not something you could learn from an outdated textbook. You're doing the world a service. KEEP UP THE FANTASTIC WORK!!! ❤❤❤❤😊😊😊
It's interesting to see their system's host evolve, Nin had a much more soft tone to her voice, and she didn't swear nearly as much as Kya. Kya speaks loudly and confidently, it's really nice to see them get this boost in confidence. Also, Kya has a little bit of Kyle australian accent :D
I want you to know that as our primary protector, Kyle was my role model. I looked up to him as what I wanted to be, because I started out similar to the feeling that you and Kyle have described. I was upset that I had to be this way, but you helped me grow into the protector I am today. I never had anyone in my life to look up to until we found your channel. This is getting super f’ing sappy but I just wanted to tell you, thank you, you helped me and continue to help me so much. Can’t wait to watch your next gaming live stream, I really like those. -Tyler
Tears hearing you (Kya) talk about how much Kyle has done for your system we will never be able to comprehend. Thank you for explaining how he transformed his suffering to be primary protector and why he had such a goofy exterior (to be perceived as less threatening to get a true read on people.). Veryyyy helpful to learn
Okay when you said 2018, I realized how much time had gone by and how long you all had been helping me deal with my own life. I've been watching since the host was Chloe and I will absolutely continue to watch. So..thank you to the whole system for everything.
Kya, I can't thank you and the system enough for sharing your story. Watching Kyle's videos has always been such a comfort to me; he truly is a selfless, kind soul that is such a breath of fresh air. I know you've struggled with the fusion, but it's honestly so beautiful to see Kyle merge with the person he loved the most. Kyle and Nin were beautiful individuals, and Kya is such an amazing representation of the love they held. I know Kyle and Nin are still there, those memories are something you'll hold onto forever as the system continues to grow and heal. Who you were and who you are is a beauty this world can't begin to put into words. Thank you so much for giving us all a chance to see both sides. To see that suffering does not define us, and pain does not have the power to sculpt us into monsters. To Kyle, thank you for doing an impossible job when no one asked you to. Thank you for protecting Chloe even if you didn't feel like you had a choice. You were so strong. And Kya, you continue to hold Kyle's strength every day. Kyle and Nin together ARE OP as fuck, and I know you, and all the memories you hold, will continue to heal. You have fought so hard, babes. You deserve happiness. To the system, I'm so sorry for the trauma I can't even begin to comprehend. You are strong. You are powerful. You didn't come this far JUST to come this far. You have beautiful memories just around the corner. I hope you all find all the happiness in this world. Thank you so much. For giving all of us a chance to lay down our own trauma, and remind us that we aren't out here fighting alone. ❤
I just wanted to say thank you so much for the information you put out for DID. When I had first met my love she had just gotten diagnosed with DID and she had to learn about it and same with me. A bunch of your videos came in handy to help us both and all I can say now is THANK YOU SO MUCH. I treasure her with all my heart and all I wanna do is be there for her and love her every day. She is the love of my life and I just wanna keep supporting her and making her happy every single day. It’s all thanks to the videos you’ve put out. Thank you again.
Kyle was SOOOOOOO much more than a goofball to me. Yes, his jovial humor allowed cracks to form in my wall of depression, but the way he (you) made me feel safe, that I would be ok, and that I was not alone will forever be a priceless part of my life that I could never thank yall enough. I am a single personality and an only child (no siblings), and when I lost my Mom in 2019, I spiraled into what turned out to be the darkest days of my life and Kyle (you) was there for me. Never in a million years would I have guessed I would have been so emotionally unstable. Your videos gave me something to look forward to when I thought there was nothing else to look forward to. I have since lost my Dad six months ago now, and I am trying my best not to go back to that place I was in 2019 and again, who shows up in today's video.....Kyle (you)! I feel like it was a reminder to keep believing that I will be ok and I will get through this.
@@DissociaDIDnot the original commenter but I’d love if she’d read Goodnight Moon. It’s one of my favorite childhood books and always made me feel safe and comforted
OMG, comparing you now to you back then, you had such a baby face. It crazy to think how much youve grown in 5 years. Gotta love the brash honesty from kyle. The way he emphasized "titties" has me dying 😂
Nah, I remember Kyle's protector role. I remember that anytime the littles were upset Kyle was one of the people calming them down. No funny story can negate that. Just adds layers.
god dammit guys, I was just gonna go for a run but i'm definitely watching this now. The dissociadid grind don't stop for no workout! Also congrats on the sponsorship!
Finally realized difference between fused together and disappear. Used to feel that fuse into one means only one alter left and one have to deal with everything until 25:55 which the word is "I still feel like Kyle just extra and a bit different."
When I think of Kyle, I think of him as a protective older brother that radiates warmth and safety. The person you search for in a crowded room, or at a complicated family get-together. The person that you could text or call at anytime, or the person that would give you that big bear hug after a difficult experience. The brother that would still joke and mess with you, but never anywhere near that "too much" boundary. The person that could always read you and know what you needed and never made you feel like you were in debt to them or made you feel like you had to mask for comfort. Someone filled with so much love, courage, and compassion. As a neurodivergent person who has experienced trauma and struggles with uncertainty, Kyle is what I would call a "Constant". For me, that means security and safety, unconditional love, peace. His energy, now a part of Kya, is safe and genuine. Seeing Kyle just always made me feel like I was in a protected space. I totally forgot about the banana story! I guess I don't associate that with him, really, just the safe protector ❤🩵🧡
Honestly about the time that you all had started this channel is when i found out about my system as well. My primart protector Kal kind of saw Kyle as a role model. We are forever greatful that your channel got started ❤. The bodies is about the same age as you all, so knowing there were other people with this disorder who are similar in age made us feel not so alone. Yalls videos and suggestions have helped us so much ❤. We cant thank you all enough.
This was about the time I started watching the channel. Your videos have always been a source of comfort for me and helped me to learn a lot about my CPTSD with your videos about structural dissociation. This made me feel so nostalgic and so proud of you for your growth. I hope to see a lot of following videos from you guys. Much love to the whole system.
Kyle was definitely one of my favorite people to listen to talk, he really was a funny guy. But I could definitely tell he had a ferocity to him that I could see when he'd front to protect and help other alters. I'll always be a Kyle stan. I see alott of Kyle shine through Kya still.
Awh.. this was heartwarming. Like getting a visit from family you havent seen in years. You can hear Kyle heavily in your voice in this. ❤ And its really awesome to just see the growth and differences!
Also, it may seem like only the goofy stuff is remembered, but i promise you me and im sure many others remember what his role fully entailed, what he did for the system.. he was a goof.. but he did so much for yall. And that will always be cherished ❤
I remember that video 😂 I was so fascinated by your system. I felt (and still do feel) like you guys were so brave and heroes for everyone who has been abused and carry negative dialog allowing those thoughts to hold us back. You guys are amazing!
Kyle was someone I genuinely loved and valued. He brightened my day so many times during a really challenging period of my life. It's so good to revisit this video, and so good to see so much of him in Kya now. Thank you for doing this- this is the hardest I've laughed in a long time. Much love to you
I’ve been watching your videos for years and I’m such a fan! The way your communication on screen has grown is amazing - thank you for your concise and clear education, I’ve grown from it too and I’m grateful ❤
This channel was first introduced to me through this makeup video! Because I was clueless about DID at the time, I began my research on it after watching this video. After watching the educational videos you guys have posted on this channel and doing some research, I found that psychology is something that interests me. Kya might find this makeup video embarrassing to watch, but it's actually one of the main reasons why I am a psychology student now! I appreciate your inspiration. Greetings from Turkey. ❤
SPONSORSSS! YES! So so happy for you! You deserve everything good, guys. We found your system around that time of the Kyle video. So glad you're still here. You mean so much to our system and others🥺💙 -J & Ben
"It looks like it was filmed on a toaster" made me 😂. We loved you even when you filmed on a toaster! And seeing you react just brought the Kyle part if you out so much more and it was so nice to see. Kyle was funny and sweet and also incredibly strong and important. Love you, Kya, and all of your (past and current) parts. 💜
Oh blimey, I've been a follower since Chloe was hoast, and seeing kyle again just me smile so much... But also watching you react made me smile loads too, because i don't think it has ever been more evident that kyle is still absolutely there as part of you Kya 😁
It is crazy to be reminded of the time in years you’ve been consuming someone’s content, four years!! how come? we are such different people now and I still enjoy so much this channel 🖤🥺 so thxx
Thank you. Thank you for being you. And especially thank you for the part towards the end where you were talking more about being a primary protector. It gave me much more of an understanding for ours, and it helped me understand things about him that I had been struggling to grasp and he had trouble trying to communicate. So, thank you guys:) Thanks for playing such a big role in accepting and understanding each other better. You guys are absolutely amazing.
i got so excited when the sponsor segment came up, i'm so glad to see you guys are getting that support again. Kyle was absolutely an integral part of the system, just as every alter is. we will never know everything he has done for you guys and likely for others as well but from everything you have shared, he did an immense amount of work that deserves to be praised. our Primary Protector is very well loved by many in our system and well respected by most. he also has a big job and lots of tasks daily from our main Gatekeeper and he's always running around and helping everyone out. he got to front and talk to one of our irl friends who is also a system and talk about his job and responsibilities and he said that was very helpful and validating. I hope you know that your role now is just as important and valuable as Kyle's was. you are an amazing, strong, assertive and capable Host and your system is lucky to have you. -Clove (Sylvar System)
I've been watching your channel since the beginning and one of my favorite things about Kyle was his duality. He was the loveable goof, but he was also a fierce protector. I can't stress enough how much I respect Kyle. I have so much respect for everyone in your system.
You guys helped me so much in figuring out what was going on in my brain. I owe my sanity to you and I really mean that. Learning to communicate with my system was a struggle and it was scary even admitting out loud but this channel gave me the strength and courage I needed to get my life together
Kyle was one of those people I looked up to, respected, and really loved. this was a wonderful video to have as a memory of him. Of course I still look up to and respect Kya, I’m proud of how far this system has come and love y’all! ❤
I have been watching since 2018, since the beginning, I watched videos from when Chloe was host, then Nin, and now Kya. It's amazing how much Kyle's distinctive accent came back to Kya in this video. I normally hear it sometimes but Kya's reactions while watching Kyle were almost like hearing Kyle speak. So glad you are back and being you, Kya! You have helped educate so many people and you've helped so many of us, me included, with our own mental health and trauma. You are a wonderful creator and I appreciate you very much.
The end of that was very moving. I'm glad you put that out there about how Kyle wanted and how you want Kyle to be remembered and how much he took on and did and that turning the pain into protection was at the core of who he was. Very powerful. ❤
I don't remember Kyle as "the banana guy" I remember him as the voice that saved you from all your hardships. He is still there and I still see him in you.
i love how u guys use makeup to express your selves and ur individualities! you (kya) and Mara’s styles are my fave. it always looks amazing and very creative 😊❤
we recently got to the point through therapy where we are now able to stream and be on camera for exactly an hour before we need to stop for a overwhelm break. I'm so glad to see the difference from Kyle to Kya now! This made my whole day. /gen - Liama
sponsorship!! proud of you guys! take that bag!! you deserve it! and also this video format of reacting to old stuff of yours could really be interesting and maybe a bit less heavy to produce for you, maybe for weeks in which life is a bit worse in general. i think hearing about your experience of what you were thinking during a past video or just your thoughts about things you did in the past is really nice to see and can honestly be so useful to hear. and i wanna also say that at least for me personally kyle was never just a goofball or a funny’s guy. i’ve always seen in him that kind of strength and kindness and determination that, based on my experiences, you only develop when you go through stuff. i’ve always thought of kyle as reliable and kind of an anchor for what i imagined to be everyone in your system. while i don’t and can not know of the things he did inside or for specific alters, i could feel the weight of his role and i could perceive how trusted and fundamental for you guys he was. i hope you all in the system know that kyle was very appreciated and that you, kya, are too, even if we will never know all the details of all the things you have done for the system and all the things you sacrificed or all the time you were there for others in the system. you are appreciated and seen as a strong and trust worthy individual, not just a funny random person (even tho you are that too). love your videos by the way!
Kyle, you have made such an impact and you have been seen my at least me. I have been here since very close to the beginning, you are seen and perceived as everything you have described in the video. Those who only watch a chip pr whatever won’t see it, but those who took the time to listen with an open heart/mind- you were seen, heard, and loved/supported. Thank you for every role you took and every job you have done and continue to do as Kya. Thank you for all you have taught while protecting the whole system (along with others) 💙
I just want to say that even though I didn't see all that Kyle did, I felt it then, and I feel it now. He is/was amazing, strong and kind. I always saw that he helped you grow and get stronger and stronger, and I am super happy that you can still have him with you and "give" strength and charisma so characteristic of him. I loved Kyle, Chloe, Nina and Nin and I still love you all as Kya. You make me feel like you can do all because you transmit so much power and kindness. I followed your channel then and still follow it now because you prove every single day that you are worth it and amazing. I hope to support you many years down the line and see you get stronger and happier each day.
I needed that pep talk in the middle, I started my own UA-cam channel 3 years ago and posted 7 monthly videos before life got in the way. I miss it and I wanna get back to them so much ❤
Kyle always seemed/seems to remind me of myself. The "ya have to laugh otherwise you will cry" type. Laughing and joking and making "light' of trauma, or a stressful situation, is a coping mechanism that I have. I find if I can joke and laugh about my past, or current problems, it puts others at ease when discussing theirs and makes it easier for me to discuss mine. I can't even imagine how important that skill is to an Alter that is so integral to the System. Helping other Alters acclimatise to who/where/what they are and communicating between others. Being a "goof" is a skill and an amazing gift. So never undervalue Kyle's/your "lovable goof" title. It doesn't diminish the trauma felt. It shows the immense strength of character to be able to find joy and laugh, or make others find joy, IN SPITE of Trauma. I feel like I have rambled, so instead, I'll just say Kyle rocks! Kya rocks! The System rocks! YOU rock!
I can't remember what video it was from but I'll never forget seeing Kyle soothe Nin as she was explaining something traumatic by telling her everything was okay and rubbing her arms - you could tell he has a heart of gold and cares deeply for his system ❤️
I've been obsessed with you guys for a few weeks now, I watched you all on Anthony Padilla's channel and the way y'all talked about DID just made me incredibly interested in learning more about it. I don't have DID, but I am a social worker (in training 😂) so learning about mental health disorder/illnesses is so goddamn interesting to me. This video is just something that I can't even put into words how absolutely insane it is to see you, as Kya now, look back on just Kyle. You guys have taught me so much and I've been talking about DID nonestop to my partner 😂
This was bittersweet to watch because I miss him and he did so well at the position he was given but at the same time I'm proud because he helped you all grow and heal and that was when his time was done and he did his job amazingly and he will be forever missed as well as the girls chole, Nina, Nin and Nadia. It's funny when I think about it but you and I had almost the exact same reaction while I was watching, like almost everything was alike and I guess it's because we have great minds lol I don't know but I enjoyed this just as much as I enjoyed it the first time I watched it when Kyle did it. I just wanted to say how completely proud of you I am because there has been so much growth and understanding and I'm just so proud 😪🤧 I love you all so very much 💕 - J ( protector of Vibe Tribe System )
Kyle always gave me so much comfort, felt lika a big brother who stepped in to parent his tribe in their most vulnerable times. I loved seeing his videos cos i could bask in those vibes ❤
I have to say, the way you had your hair dyed in that video was fabulous! Also very nostalgic to see you react, i used to watch this video Kyle made back when the home i lived in was complete chaos and it would brighten my day even if it was only for a little while ❤️
15:16 This was so powerful! I've been sitting on several half-formed video ideas for a channel I haven't even started yet for well over a year, and I haven't felt the courage to actually work on anything and get stuff out there-but you make a compelling argument! If people like you, they'll stick around to watch. Thank you Kya ❤️
Kyle never was always more than a loveable goof to me, I could tell there was so much kindness in him and he would lay down his life for you guys. This video made me so nostalgic and I almost cried seeing his mannerisms shine through Kya.
I remember feeling SO much respect and love for Kyle. I remember relating to him regarding dysphoria and I remember it being extremely validiting that he felt it in the same way I do because in a way he wasn't a trans man in the traditional sense. He was a guy that sometimes lived life in a feminine body. So he understood what I felt despite me being born in it and him not. anyway, i just wanted to say that his perspective of being a guy alter in a fem body was really validating to see as a trans man thank you Kyle for everything you did, and thank you Kya for keeping his memory alive through you we love you ❤
I just want to say that your videos really help me learn about DID and they also make me smile, me being new to DID it's nice to know that there is someone out there teaching you about, if someone did have DID, not pointing any fingers, maybe me, want would you say to them to help them.❤
i was just about to write something along the lines of "maybe Kyle's voice was so high because he wasn't comfortable with unmasking?" and then i got to the part where you actually said it lol
Hello, I just wanted to say thank you, your videos are truly a gift to the world. Ive been following your channel for around 4 years or so and each video holds a special place with me. You've become a source of not only information but comfort as well to me. Im sure im not the only one who revisits your videos even after already seeing them before just for your kind nature and comforting demeanor. Your channel has become a safe space for me. Ive delt with severe mental health issues as long as I can remember but your strength is a reminder to keep going, find answers, and heal. Though I dont know you personally, I love you and what you all bring into this world. Im so very proud of all of you and all you've overcome. I cant wait to see where youll go in the future. Once again, thank you ❤
okay hi my name is charlie and i am the primary protector of my system. i really appreciated the last little bit recognizing kyle. my role and responsibilities are a touch different to what kyles were, but i think one thing can be said for almost every primary protector ive ever met. it takes a lot of work and courage to take what happened and remain kind. it takes even more to step up and continue to face difficult things for the sake of others. i dont think that wording is the greatest but you get my point hopefully. thank you
okay so you have DID right?? It’s okay if you don’t want to answer but I am just so curious oh my god. Okay so there are obviously multiple alters in one body, and Kya mentioned in the video (and also in some other video’s) the “headspace”. Now what does that look like? Does it look like anything or is it more something abstract like- it’s there, but it also isn’t there. Just like- I guess my question is: where do all the alters chill when they aren’t fronting?
Tbf, “lovable goof” sounds like an important part of the strategy. And maybe it’s not so much that that’s *all* you’re remembered for, but rather, the part that people enjoy reminiscing about.
i always think of and remember kyle as a strong brotherly character, his beautiful goofy personality will never diminish the lasting powerful aura of protection he had, he did the most incredible, brave things imaginable.
Kyle: “I don’t normally wear hats.”
Kya: *So that was a f*cking lie.*
🤣🤣🤣🤣
@@DissociaDIDlol ❤
is kya kyle? i know she said that she used to be kyle but idk if they mean that they are currently kya or they changed their name
@@shadowflash2392 Kya is actually a fusion of Kyle and Nin I think Kya said it somewhere at the start of the video but Kya is basically just Kyle and Nin as one
Ok Kyle quite literally described gender dysphoria in the best way possible
For sure!
The “reassuring that you don’t look like a guy” thing happened to me too lol :’)
@@faeneneomg me too, it sucks
Right?! We’re masc presenting but still get “you have femme face” or “you don’t like a guy” and stuff. Pain
The gag when he did the eyeshadow
HELP the geniune shock on kyles face when he smudged the makeup everywhere is priceless 👁👄👁
I don't know what I was expecting tbh Kyle is still a mystery even tho I literally remember experiencing this 😂
When he pulls his eyelid down…. 😂
Make up makes my face itch so bad so I rarely put any on. I feel for Kyle! I feel the same way. I’m always like “What did I just do?!”
At least Kyle was having fun so
@@calestaiezu214Same with me, if I apply my mascara wrong my eye will be irritated all day, my skin is very sensitive
It's so bizarre seeing your past lives & see you, Kya. Weird to think 4 people who had varying opinions of eachother came together to survive. It's like seeing the same canvas get re-painted again.
That's such an interesting way to look at it!
@@DissociaDID Ain't it? Like maybe whatever was originally painted on that canvas can still be seen if you look close enough - but standing far away its something new; something beautiful.
It's art at its finest!
yeah that’s a really nice metaphor :)
@@AmbushedSunny i love that metaphor, literally moved me to tears
For me personally, Kyle never came across as JUST the lovable goof. I think in his Meet The Alters Video, he talked a bit about how his role as protector came to be. Ever since learning that, I've had a great deal of respect for him, cause none of us would've ever been able to tell from a few videos what tremendous amounts of responsibility he had to take on, and what challenges he surely had to face. I've always remembered him as a sweet goofball, but never without the respect for what he was and what he stood for.
Kyle holding that eyeliner like a knife totally looked like a horror movie scene ngl 🥲😂
😂😂😂
Let me know if this is not okay to say! I'll delete this comment.
Kyle was an absolute GEM. One of my most favorite people on the internet and still is. It's so good to see glimpses of him in Kya. I appreciate this reaction so much and it's making my world feel like a better place.
Awh I'm so glad it's cheering you up! And all of that is absolutely fine to say ❤️❤️
Kyle!! Shout out to the part of you Kya who was such a pillar of protection and strength and vulnerability in the system 💛🧡💜 You’re the most beautiful people and person Kya and I’m so happy to know you through the internet.
Aww, loved getting to see Kyle. He was such a good sport and made me smile
not ok no reason
Kyle was (and still is) so well loved and respected. I remember watching this video and others where he fronted and just feeling that as much as Kyle's charm and sense of humor was a necessary part of his job, we were all so lucky that he took the time to use his gifts to make us smile too. We remember.
❤️❤️❤️❤️
I really miss him in such an odd way. I know he's there, but also not quite, and it's truly curious to experience. He showed care to all of us in such a firm and heartfelt way
Watching Kyle gives me the same feeling as getting a warm hug.
Aww
Yes, it is very much like that.
Same.
We empathize with the "missing who we were" thing. Our partner proposed to one of the alters from well before we were diagnosed. That part of us either fusing or going dormant literally was part of the reason we even sought psychiatric help in the first place. We still shed tears over the fact that we don't feel that same level of connection or affection that we allegedly used to show. We just don't remember it, and it doesn't feel like anyone who primarily is out these days. It breaks our heart sometimes. And we know it's hard on our partner.
Anyway, sorry for the ramble. All that to say, we totally understand that bittersweet feeling. It's wild to see how far you've come re: production and healing. Sending healing, good vibes, and lots of love.
All the very best.
-Valda
It was really cool and heartwarming hearing Kya's voice slowly start sounding more and more like Kyle's, and Kyle's accent really coming out. As much as I think we all miss Kyle, I think everyone here can agree that Kya is what this system needed, and they are so strong; we're all so proud of how far you've all come💕
Thank you so much ❤️❤️❤️
21:39 I remember that. Nina was describing herself physically and mentioning her skin colour wasn't as pale as the body, because the body was "atrociously pale" 😂😂😂 That's when Chloe wrote "thanks, Nina"
I feel like this quote sums it up the best: “We all change, when you think about it. We’re all different people all through our lives. And that’s OK, that’s good, you gotta keep moving, so long as you remember all the people that you used to be.”
Oooh, that’s from Doctor Who. Love that quote
I’ve been watching this channel since 2018 with Chloe when the dissociaDID channel first started. Just wanted to say thank you. You’ve helped me tremendously with my own c-ptsd and understanding my trauma. I recently had a massive panic attack while being out in public, and I was able to come out of it by remembering your panic attack videos and grounding videos. I’m very thankful for your system ❤.
I'm so glad and also so proud of you! It's so hard to remember anything when you're panicking, congratulations! ❤️❤️❤️
@@DissociaDID thank you! 🥰 it means a lot to hear you say that ! ❤️
Same! We've been watching since pretty early, since chloe, before we realized our system existed, and their videos have helped us so dang much
Kyle's accent is coming through while you guys react and it makes me so nostalgic ❤
Right, it was so cute I loved it:)
We came over to comment exactly this. It's so good to hear Kyle's voice come back through Kya, even just in a little way like this. Such a good reminder that even when we integrate, everyone we were before are never truly "gone."
I was just about to comment that!! It’s nice to hear his accent again 😊
Kyle was a soldier, and we could see that. Yes, he was funny and goofy, but I and many littles felt so safe with him (through like videos and things obviously) because there was a side to him that screamed “I will protect you no matter what.” I have nothing but respect for that man.
Kyle further gained my respect when he went on cam to announce that you were taking time off because of the online issues you had with another UA-camr. I saw how upset and protective he was and I just knew that he will make sure that all of you will stay safe and healthy.
I do not remember this video, but I would like to watch it since I think I've only seen him in a light funny mood.
Kyle comes forth during the reaction video. It's like he never left.. the accent, the attitude, the masculine voice - and at the end it melts back into Kya. It's fascinating to watch and listen.
Wow 5 years. 2018 seems like such a time ago. These have been some long 5 years man but we all made it trough it. Give yourselves a pat on the back for still going strong after 5 years. Love you Kya and your system. One last thing Kyles makeup video to this day is still my go to video if i need to have a laugh as Kyle always cheered me up on those darker days. Lots of love guys and to you all who have been here these last 5 years.
❤️❤️❤️❤️ Here's to the 5 year gang 💪💪
The way Kaya alternates between referring to Kyle in the first and the third person is actually so relatable and perfectly reflects the confusion of fusing. I describe it as a space shuttle that detaches as it goes higher up because some parts are just discarded and no longer feel part of the whole anymore
Hearing "Chloe used to love that" makes me a bit nostalgic. I was watching since Chloe was still host. At this point it's not something I'm always super concious of but remember since Nin. But every time hearing her name I'm like aw, yeah, Chloe. Super proud of how far y'all have gone since those days
Kyle is me asf trying to do makeup even now 😭 I’m fr just finger painting like “hmm let’s see what this does”
Relatable content
I still fingerpaint eyeshadow on sometimes😅. Definitely a vibe
Help, Kyle putting on makeup, even without amazing quality and light, is PRICELESS. I feel bad, but I was also wheezing, I was laughing so hard. 💀 - Luna and Jace
Congrats on the sponsorship! All support going your way! -Cora💜
The make up video by Kyle is one of my favorite videos of DissociaDID. It’s where I began to watch this channel
You're an OG! Thanks for being here so long!
Its so interesting because you can almost see the split in kya, like when theyre almost like nin, she refers almost to kyle, “him, he, kyle” and when theyre almost like kyle he refers to himself, “me, myself, I”
OMG congrats on the sponsorship!!! We’ve used Atlas VPN for a long time too and it works really well! -Murdock
Ahh I'm really glad, was genuinely impressed too! And thank you sm! Every sponsor will help us afford the case but we would only ever work with ones we really believe in ❤️
@@DissociaDIDwe've actually been searching for a good vpn for a long time but we aren't great with technology stuff. We are gonna give this one a try!
@@MysticSynergyit’s absolutely worth it. We’ve been using it for about a year and it’s never given us any problems.
Kya- "He was approachable, he was trustworthy, he was charismatic, he was gentle and reassuring, but also really funny."
So are you Kya. :3
You've inheritated a lot of good and admirable traits.
Thank u!
I remember watching this back then wow, this is brings me a while back mentally speaking. So proud of everything you guys have achieved and your growth :)
Is it weird that I got so excited about the VPN ad? Like, yall have had such hard fucking time with your mental health and harassment and stuff, but every now and then some good stuff happens, and now you're getting paid a sponsorship for your content. It's WELL fucking deserved. Dunno if this is yall's first sponsor or if I've just never seen one before, but I hope there's many more to come. Thanks Atlas VPN for sponsoring DissociaDID
I'm glad you got a sponsor to help you afford a lawyer!
Yes yes we are so so grateful! ❤️❤️
A lawyer, what happened?
@@ms.wilson6439Theres multiple videos about this on their channel
Oh my this is nostalgia. We remember when that video came out. Your channel has been very helpful for us and our system. We are going through a lot in life rn including abrupt job change and a lot of stressors so we are very appreciative that y’all are posting more again. We watch y’all to help with the anxiety and stress. Good health to y’all!
Good luck navigating so much change, I'm glad we've been able to help in some way! Youve got this 💪💪❤️
We personally never saw Kyle as just a goof. He was like an older brother, the father figure of the friend group that is your system. If other alters laughed at the banana story, it wasn't because you were laughable, it was because you had given them the space to be able to laugh.
-Billie, emotional protector, Fenix system
I felt like I heard Kyle's voice about 90% of the time as Kya spoke in this vid. I miss Kyle as well but hearing Kyle in Kya's voice is comforting. Love to you All ❤
Kyle had such a quietly intense energy, and I think anyone who watched more than just a few videos could sense his deeply protective nature. I love it when I can see that same energy in Kya. LOTS OF LOVE!!!!
THIS IS SO IRONIC-- a WEEK ago when I was binging all your videos I missed (I watch in batches), I randomly decided to go back and rewatch Kyle's makeup video too. THAT BOY, I SWEAR.
I loved the bit where you described what witnessing muscle memory from the inside is like, how Kyle watched Chloe do the makeup and thought it was supposed to be all slapdash because she was just so proficient. It makes perfect sense!!!!! It's so genuinely fascinating to learn the nuances of how DID works from an internal source-- 100% not something you could learn from an outdated textbook. You're doing the world a service.
KEEP UP THE FANTASTIC WORK!!! ❤❤❤❤😊😊😊
Thank you so much!! ❤️❤️❤️❤️
It's interesting to see their system's host evolve, Nin had a much more soft tone to her voice, and she didn't swear nearly as much as Kya. Kya speaks loudly and confidently, it's really nice to see them get this boost in confidence. Also, Kya has a little bit of Kyle australian accent :D
I want you to know that as our primary protector, Kyle was my role model. I looked up to him as what I wanted to be, because I started out similar to the feeling that you and Kyle have described. I was upset that I had to be this way, but you helped me grow into the protector I am today. I never had anyone in my life to look up to until we found your channel. This is getting super f’ing sappy but I just wanted to tell you, thank you, you helped me and continue to help me so much.
Can’t wait to watch your next gaming live stream, I really like those.
-Tyler
Tears hearing you (Kya) talk about how much Kyle has done for your system we will never be able to comprehend. Thank you for explaining how he transformed his suffering to be primary protector and why he had such a goofy exterior (to be perceived as less threatening to get a true read on people.). Veryyyy helpful to learn
Okay when you said 2018, I realized how much time had gone by and how long you all had been helping me deal with my own life. I've been watching since the host was Chloe and I will absolutely continue to watch. So..thank you to the whole system for everything.
Kya, I can't thank you and the system enough for sharing your story. Watching Kyle's videos has always been such a comfort to me; he truly is a selfless, kind soul that is such a breath of fresh air. I know you've struggled with the fusion, but it's honestly so beautiful to see Kyle merge with the person he loved the most. Kyle and Nin were beautiful individuals, and Kya is such an amazing representation of the love they held. I know Kyle and Nin are still there, those memories are something you'll hold onto forever as the system continues to grow and heal. Who you were and who you are is a beauty this world can't begin to put into words. Thank you so much for giving us all a chance to see both sides. To see that suffering does not define us, and pain does not have the power to sculpt us into monsters. To Kyle, thank you for doing an impossible job when no one asked you to. Thank you for protecting Chloe even if you didn't feel like you had a choice. You were so strong. And Kya, you continue to hold Kyle's strength every day. Kyle and Nin together ARE OP as fuck, and I know you, and all the memories you hold, will continue to heal. You have fought so hard, babes. You deserve happiness. To the system, I'm so sorry for the trauma I can't even begin to comprehend. You are strong. You are powerful. You didn't come this far JUST to come this far. You have beautiful memories just around the corner. I hope you all find all the happiness in this world. Thank you so much. For giving all of us a chance to lay down our own trauma, and remind us that we aren't out here fighting alone. ❤
I just wanted to say thank you so much for the information you put out for DID. When I had first met my love she had just gotten diagnosed with DID and she had to learn about it and same with me. A bunch of your videos came in handy to help us both and all I can say now is THANK YOU SO MUCH. I treasure her with all my heart and all I wanna do is be there for her and love her every day. She is the love of my life and I just wanna keep supporting her and making her happy every single day. It’s all thanks to the videos you’ve put out. Thank you again.
This is beautiful, so glad to be a helpful resource! ❤️
Remember that video so well when you guys first posted it, I laughed so hard watching 😅 was a big mood booster for me x
Awh I'm so glad!!
Kyle was SOOOOOOO much more than a goofball to me. Yes, his jovial humor allowed cracks to form in my wall of depression, but the way he (you) made me feel safe, that I would be ok, and that I was not alone will forever be a priceless part of my life that I could never thank yall enough. I am a single personality and an only child (no siblings), and when I lost my Mom in 2019, I spiraled into what turned out to be the darkest days of my life and Kyle (you) was there for me. Never in a million years would I have guessed I would have been so emotionally unstable. Your videos gave me something to look forward to when I thought there was nothing else to look forward to. I have since lost my Dad six months ago now, and I am trying my best not to go back to that place I was in 2019 and again, who shows up in today's video.....Kyle (you)! I feel like it was a reminder to keep believing that I will be ok and I will get through this.
I love Kyle's story about being identified as a boy by the woman in the store. He was so happy!
can you ask Maeri. if she can read us a bedtime story? She mentioned that she would like to do so in her Meet The Alters video ❤
I'm sure she'd be happy to do that! Any story you want in particular? I'll leave her a message ❤️
@@DissociaDIDnot the original commenter but I’d love if she’d read Goodnight Moon. It’s one of my favorite childhood books and always made me feel safe and comforted
@@DissociaDID Tysm! I believe any story that Maeri chooses will be wonderful and pleasant! Love you all so much ❤️
thats a great idea, if maeri is willing to do so that would be really nice. she and sally have that easy going voices.
I love this comment and I’m glad you are tuned in. 🌻🪷 Bedtime stories are sacred.
OMG, comparing you now to you back then, you had such a baby face. It crazy to think how much youve grown in 5 years. Gotta love the brash honesty from kyle. The way he emphasized "titties" has me dying 😂
Nah, I remember Kyle's protector role. I remember that anytime the littles were upset Kyle was one of the people calming them down. No funny story can negate that. Just adds layers.
god dammit guys, I was just gonna go for a run but i'm definitely watching this now. The dissociadid grind don't stop for no workout!
Also congrats on the sponsorship!
Priorities 😎
Finally realized difference between fused together and disappear. Used to feel that fuse into one means only one alter left and one have to deal with everything until 25:55 which the word is "I still feel like Kyle just extra and a bit different."
When I think of Kyle, I think of him as a protective older brother that radiates warmth and safety. The person you search for in a crowded room, or at a complicated family get-together. The person that you could text or call at anytime, or the person that would give you that big bear hug after a difficult experience. The brother that would still joke and mess with you, but never anywhere near that "too much" boundary. The person that could always read you and know what you needed and never made you feel like you were in debt to them or made you feel like you had to mask for comfort. Someone filled with so much love, courage, and compassion. As a neurodivergent person who has experienced trauma and struggles with uncertainty, Kyle is what I would call a "Constant". For me, that means security and safety, unconditional love, peace. His energy, now a part of Kya, is safe and genuine. Seeing Kyle just always made me feel like I was in a protected space. I totally forgot about the banana story! I guess I don't associate that with him, really, just the safe protector ❤🩵🧡
Honestly about the time that you all had started this channel is when i found out about my system as well. My primart protector Kal kind of saw Kyle as a role model. We are forever greatful that your channel got started ❤. The bodies is about the same age as you all, so knowing there were other people with this disorder who are similar in age made us feel not so alone. Yalls videos and suggestions have helped us so much ❤. We cant thank you all enough.
This was about the time I started watching the channel. Your videos have always been a source of comfort for me and helped me to learn a lot about my CPTSD with your videos about structural dissociation. This made me feel so nostalgic and so proud of you for your growth. I hope to see a lot of following videos from you guys. Much love to the whole system.
Kyle was definitely one of my favorite people to listen to talk, he really was a funny guy. But I could definitely tell he had a ferocity to him that I could see when he'd front to protect and help other alters. I'll always be a Kyle stan. I see alott of Kyle shine through Kya still.
Awh.. this was heartwarming. Like getting a visit from family you havent seen in years. You can hear Kyle heavily in your voice in this. ❤ And its really awesome to just see the growth and differences!
Also, it may seem like only the goofy stuff is remembered, but i promise you me and im sure many others remember what his role fully entailed, what he did for the system.. he was a goof.. but he did so much for yall. And that will always be cherished ❤
I remember that video 😂 I was so fascinated by your system. I felt (and still do feel) like you guys were so brave and heroes for everyone who has been abused and carry negative dialog allowing those thoughts to hold us back. You guys are amazing!
❤️❤️❤️❤️
Watching you watch Kyle was wonderful. You were so accepting and loving. Your All loved and valued by so many people.
Kyle was someone I genuinely loved and valued. He brightened my day so many times during a really challenging period of my life. It's so good to revisit this video, and so good to see so much of him in Kya now. Thank you for doing this- this is the hardest I've laughed in a long time. Much love to you
I’ve been watching your videos for years and I’m such a fan! The way your communication on screen has grown is amazing - thank you for your concise and clear education, I’ve grown from it too and I’m grateful ❤
This is such a lovely comment, thank you so much! ❤️❤️
@@DissociaDID ❤️❤️❤️
This channel was first introduced to me through this makeup video! Because I was clueless about DID at the time, I began my research on it after watching this video. After watching the educational videos you guys have posted on this channel and doing some research, I found that psychology is something that interests me. Kya might find this makeup video embarrassing to watch, but it's actually one of the main reasons why I am a psychology student now! I appreciate your inspiration. Greetings from Turkey. ❤
SPONSORSSS! YES! So so happy for you! You deserve everything good, guys. We found your system around that time of the Kyle video. So glad you're still here. You mean so much to our system and others🥺💙 -J & Ben
I hope you win the court and get justice from the people who hurt you and the others. ❤❤❤ Love from Thailand
Sorry for screaming, please read it as excitement and not anger: OMG YOU GOT A SPONSER!?!?!!!! I AM SO F*** HAPPY FOR YOU GUYS!!!
I love seeing how comfortable the system has gotten in front of the camera and really being able to express theirselves without much thought to it.
"It looks like it was filmed on a toaster" made me 😂. We loved you even when you filmed on a toaster! And seeing you react just brought the Kyle part if you out so much more and it was so nice to see. Kyle was funny and sweet and also incredibly strong and important. Love you, Kya, and all of your (past and current) parts. 💜
Oh blimey, I've been a follower since Chloe was hoast, and seeing kyle again just me smile so much... But also watching you react made me smile loads too, because i don't think it has ever been more evident that kyle is still absolutely there as part of you Kya 😁
It is crazy to be reminded of the time in years you’ve been consuming someone’s content, four years!! how come? we are such different people now and I still enjoy so much this channel 🖤🥺 so thxx
This is so lovely 😍 thank you for being here! ❤️
Thank you. Thank you for being you. And especially thank you for the part towards the end where you were talking more about being a primary protector. It gave me much more of an understanding for ours, and it helped me understand things about him that I had been struggling to grasp and he had trouble trying to communicate. So, thank you guys:) Thanks for playing such a big role in accepting and understanding each other better. You guys are absolutely amazing.
❤️❤️❤️❤️
i got so excited when the sponsor segment came up, i'm so glad to see you guys are getting that support again. Kyle was absolutely an integral part of the system, just as every alter is. we will never know everything he has done for you guys and likely for others as well but from everything you have shared, he did an immense amount of work that deserves to be praised. our Primary Protector is very well loved by many in our system and well respected by most. he also has a big job and lots of tasks daily from our main Gatekeeper and he's always running around and helping everyone out. he got to front and talk to one of our irl friends who is also a system and talk about his job and responsibilities and he said that was very helpful and validating. I hope you know that your role now is just as important and valuable as Kyle's was. you are an amazing, strong, assertive and capable Host and your system is lucky to have you.
-Clove
(Sylvar System)
I've been watching your channel since the beginning and one of my favorite things about Kyle was his duality. He was the loveable goof, but he was also a fierce protector. I can't stress enough how much I respect Kyle. I have so much respect for everyone in your system.
You guys helped me so much in figuring out what was going on in my brain. I owe my sanity to you and I really mean that. Learning to communicate with my system was a struggle and it was scary even admitting out loud but this channel gave me the strength and courage I needed to get my life together
Kyle was one of those people I looked up to, respected, and really loved. this was a wonderful video to have as a memory of him. Of course I still look up to and respect Kya, I’m proud of how far this system has come and love y’all! ❤
I have been watching since 2018, since the beginning, I watched videos from when Chloe was host, then Nin, and now Kya. It's amazing how much Kyle's distinctive accent came back to Kya in this video. I normally hear it sometimes but Kya's reactions while watching Kyle were almost like hearing Kyle speak.
So glad you are back and being you, Kya! You have helped educate so many people and you've helped so many of us, me included, with our own mental health and trauma. You are a wonderful creator and I appreciate you very much.
The end of that was very moving. I'm glad you put that out there about how Kyle wanted and how you want Kyle to be remembered and how much he took on and did and that turning the pain into protection was at the core of who he was. Very powerful. ❤
"Our skills have become WORSE since fusing with Kyle". Poor Kyle, so bad at makeup that even fusing with Nin couldn't make up (wink wink) for it
I don't remember Kyle as "the banana guy" I remember him as the voice that saved you from all your hardships. He is still there and I still see him in you.
i love how u guys use makeup to express your selves and ur individualities! you (kya) and Mara’s styles are my fave. it always looks amazing and very creative 😊❤
we recently got to the point through therapy where we are now able to stream and be on camera for exactly an hour before we need to stop for a overwhelm break. I'm so glad to see the difference from Kyle to Kya now! This made my whole day. /gen - Liama
sponsorship!! proud of you guys! take that bag!! you deserve it! and also this video format of reacting to old stuff of yours could really be interesting and maybe a bit less heavy to produce for you, maybe for weeks in which life is a bit worse in general. i think hearing about your experience of what you were thinking during a past video or just your thoughts about things you did in the past is really nice to see and can honestly be so useful to hear. and i wanna also say that at least for me personally kyle was never just a goofball or a funny’s guy. i’ve always seen in him that kind of strength and kindness and determination that, based on my experiences, you only develop when you go through stuff. i’ve always thought of kyle as reliable and kind of an anchor for what i imagined to be everyone in your system. while i don’t and can not know of the things he did inside or for specific alters, i could feel the weight of his role and i could perceive how trusted and fundamental for you guys he was. i hope you all in the system know that kyle was very appreciated and that you, kya, are too, even if we will never know all the details of all the things you have done for the system and all the things you sacrificed or all the time you were there for others in the system. you are appreciated and seen as a strong and trust worthy individual, not just a funny random person (even tho you are that too). love your videos by the way!
Kyle, you have made such an impact and you have been seen my at least me. I have been here since very close to the beginning, you are seen and perceived as everything you have described in the video. Those who only watch a chip pr whatever won’t see it, but those who took the time to listen with an open heart/mind- you were seen, heard, and loved/supported. Thank you for every role you took and every job you have done and continue to do as Kya. Thank you for all you have taught while protecting the whole system (along with others) 💙
I just want to say that even though I didn't see all that Kyle did, I felt it then, and I feel it now. He is/was amazing, strong and kind. I always saw that he helped you grow and get stronger and stronger, and I am super happy that you can still have him with you and "give" strength and charisma so characteristic of him. I loved Kyle, Chloe, Nina and Nin and I still love you all as Kya. You make me feel like you can do all because you transmit so much power and kindness. I followed your channel then and still follow it now because you prove every single day that you are worth it and amazing. I hope to support you many years down the line and see you get stronger and happier each day.
I needed that pep talk in the middle, I started my own UA-cam channel 3 years ago and posted 7 monthly videos before life got in the way. I miss it and I wanna get back to them so much ❤
Kyle always seemed/seems to remind me of myself. The "ya have to laugh otherwise you will cry" type. Laughing and joking and making "light' of trauma, or a stressful situation, is a coping mechanism that I have. I find if I can joke and laugh about my past, or current problems, it puts others at ease when discussing theirs and makes it easier for me to discuss mine.
I can't even imagine how important that skill is to an Alter that is so integral to the System. Helping other Alters acclimatise to who/where/what they are and communicating between others. Being a "goof" is a skill and an amazing gift. So never undervalue Kyle's/your "lovable goof" title. It doesn't diminish the trauma felt. It shows the immense strength of character to be able to find joy and laugh, or make others find joy, IN SPITE of Trauma.
I feel like I have rambled, so instead, I'll just say
Kyle rocks!
Kya rocks!
The System rocks!
YOU rock!
I can't remember what video it was from but I'll never forget seeing Kyle soothe Nin as she was explaining something traumatic by telling her everything was okay and rubbing her arms - you could tell he has a heart of gold and cares deeply for his system ❤️
This made me realize I've been watching y'all since 2018 and it's been so wonderful to watch you grow and change
I've been obsessed with you guys for a few weeks now, I watched you all on Anthony Padilla's channel and the way y'all talked about DID just made me incredibly interested in learning more about it. I don't have DID, but I am a social worker (in training 😂) so learning about mental health disorder/illnesses is so goddamn interesting to me. This video is just something that I can't even put into words how absolutely insane it is to see you, as Kya now, look back on just Kyle. You guys have taught me so much and I've been talking about DID nonestop to my partner 😂
This was bittersweet to watch because I miss him and he did so well at the position he was given but at the same time I'm proud because he helped you all grow and heal and that was when his time was done and he did his job amazingly and he will be forever missed as well as the girls chole, Nina, Nin and Nadia. It's funny when I think about it but you and I had almost the exact same reaction while I was watching, like almost everything was alike and I guess it's because we have great minds lol I don't know but I enjoyed this just as much as I enjoyed it the first time I watched it when Kyle did it. I just wanted to say how completely proud of you I am because there has been so much growth and understanding and I'm just so proud 😪🤧 I love you all so very much 💕 - J ( protector of Vibe Tribe System )
Kyle always gave me so much comfort, felt lika a big brother who stepped in to parent his tribe in their most vulnerable times. I loved seeing his videos cos i could bask in those vibes ❤
I have to say, the way you had your hair dyed in that video was fabulous! Also very nostalgic to see you react, i used to watch this video Kyle made back when the home i lived in was complete chaos and it would brighten my day even if it was only for a little while ❤️
15:16 This was so powerful! I've been sitting on several half-formed video ideas for a channel I haven't even started yet for well over a year, and I haven't felt the courage to actually work on anything and get stuff out there-but you make a compelling argument! If people like you, they'll stick around to watch. Thank you Kya ❤️
Kyle never was always more than a loveable goof to me, I could tell there was so much kindness in him and he would lay down his life for you guys. This video made me so nostalgic and I almost cried seeing his mannerisms shine through Kya.
I remember feeling SO much respect and love for Kyle. I remember relating to him regarding dysphoria and I remember it being extremely validiting that he felt it in the same way I do because in a way he wasn't a trans man in the traditional sense. He was a guy that sometimes lived life in a feminine body. So he understood what I felt despite me being born in it and him not.
anyway, i just wanted to say that his perspective of being a guy alter in a fem body was really validating to see as a trans man
thank you Kyle for everything you did, and thank you Kya for keeping his memory alive through you
we love you ❤
Kya reacting to Kyle in general is literally a mood and I need more of it.
i remember the "wow, thanks." comment!! nina had said that chloe was "atrociously pale" and chloe responded through the editing
That was the one!
I just want to say that your videos really help me learn about DID and they also make me smile, me being new to DID it's nice to know that there is someone out there teaching you about, if someone did have DID, not pointing any fingers, maybe me, want would you say to them to help them.❤
We have a video called "a letter to you" for newly discovered systems! ❤️
Thank you, your channel has help me so much and this is going to help more, thank you so much.❤❤❤
i was just about to write something along the lines of "maybe Kyle's voice was so high because he wasn't comfortable with unmasking?" and then i got to the part where you actually said it lol
Hello, I just wanted to say thank you, your videos are truly a gift to the world. Ive been following your channel for around 4 years or so and each video holds a special place with me. You've become a source of not only information but comfort as well to me. Im sure im not the only one who revisits your videos even after already seeing them before just for your kind nature and comforting demeanor. Your channel has become a safe space for me. Ive delt with severe mental health issues as long as I can remember but your strength is a reminder to keep going, find answers, and heal. Though I dont know you personally, I love you and what you all bring into this world. Im so very proud of all of you and all you've overcome. I cant wait to see where youll go in the future. Once again, thank you ❤
"It feels like it was filmed on a fuckin toaster." Lmfaooooooo I'm fukin dead 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣❤
okay hi my name is charlie and i am the primary protector of my system. i really appreciated the last little bit recognizing kyle. my role and responsibilities are a touch different to what kyles were, but i think one thing can be said for almost every primary protector ive ever met. it takes a lot of work and courage to take what happened and remain kind. it takes even more to step up and continue to face difficult things for the sake of others. i dont think that wording is the greatest but you get my point hopefully. thank you
okay so you have DID right?? It’s okay if you don’t want to answer but I am just so curious oh my god. Okay so there are obviously multiple alters in one body, and Kya mentioned in the video (and also in some other video’s) the “headspace”. Now what does that look like? Does it look like anything or is it more something abstract like- it’s there, but it also isn’t there. Just like- I guess my question is: where do all the alters chill when they aren’t fronting?
Tbf, “lovable goof” sounds like an important part of the strategy. And maybe it’s not so much that that’s *all* you’re remembered for, but rather, the part that people enjoy reminiscing about.
i always think of and remember kyle as a strong brotherly character, his beautiful goofy personality will never diminish the lasting powerful aura of protection he had, he did the most incredible, brave things imaginable.