John Reads the First Chapter of Turtles All the Way Down

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  • Опубліковано 4 вер 2017
  • Learn how to preorder a probably signed copy of Turtles All the Way Down, which comes out October 10th: probablysignedturtles.com. Or order a definitely unsigned copy wherever books are sold! Or come see Hank and me on tour: www.turtlesallthewaydownbook.c...
    In which John Green reads the first chapter of his new novel, Turtles All the Way Down. In it, we meet Aza, a young woman whose obsessive thought spirals do not seem to make her a particularly good detective.
    ----
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    Preorder John's new book, Turtles All the Way Down, out October 10th 2017! You can find links to both the signed and unsigned editions here: bit.ly/turtlespreorder and information on how to (probably) get a signed copy here: probablysignedturtles.com

КОМЕНТАРІ • 4,3 тис.

  • @MichiContreras
    @MichiContreras 6 років тому +2939

    "I mean, anybody can look at you. It's quite rare to find someone who sees the same world you see."
    Preordered.

    • @elazarn2
      @elazarn2 6 років тому +38

      "For somebody who actively dislikes bodily fluids, I throw up quite a lot."
      Clicked off.

    • @hena1937
      @hena1937 6 років тому +22

      elazarn2 if you did click off at that point, then you missed a good chapter.

    • @elazar.nudell
      @elazar.nudell 6 років тому +4

      @hena1937 I was being facetious. As an aside, I'm studying for a healthcare career, so I have to be ready to hear about any and all symptoms. But I honestly don't find this book as compelling as TFIOS.

    • @mck0612
      @mck0612 6 років тому +1

      Saaaaaaame

    • @braileyvine9629
      @braileyvine9629 6 років тому +64

      *John opens his mouth*
      Preordered.

  • @marygliedelicano7681
    @marygliedelicano7681 6 років тому +1305

    Am I the only one who thinks authors reading a chapter of their books out loud should be a thing?

    • @jobriq5
      @jobriq5 6 років тому +33

      I kept forgetting the main character was female due to John's baritone voice

    • @nolitimeremessorem
      @nolitimeremessorem 6 років тому +3

      Maryglie Angelie Delicano +

    • @ThatManinWhite
      @ThatManinWhite 6 років тому +10

      Maryglie Angelie Delicano I think that use to be a thing. Back when books meant something in the US.

    • @souvikroymoulick586
      @souvikroymoulick586 6 років тому +12

      It used to be a thing and it's still pretty much prevalent.

    • @marcoalaridwhite1315
      @marcoalaridwhite1315 6 років тому +7

      It often is, there are new yorker stories read by their authors weekly and plenty of audiobooks read by the author

  • @localbird
    @localbird 6 років тому +898

    John Green: the reason teenagers have been having existential crisis since 2005

    • @ss-ym2mc
      @ss-ym2mc 6 років тому +6

      accurate

    • @lolo.sa.s
      @lolo.sa.s 6 років тому +4

      Yeah 😂

    • @seizedmeansofproduction4739
      @seizedmeansofproduction4739 4 роки тому +18

      Robin Coolidge Not the reason, but certainly helping with them.

    • @jeanettenavarro6179
      @jeanettenavarro6179 3 роки тому +2

      no but really 😭 i’ve been out of my high school years for a while now & every time i re read one of his books i have a crisis all over ahah in

    • @aranoguera8945
      @aranoguera8945 3 роки тому

      @@jeanettenavarro6179 same 😭

  • @hazelpineapple3060
    @hazelpineapple3060 6 років тому +437

    i see a lot of people saying they relate to this too much...and i can't help but notice how lucky i am to not have thought spirals like this. i think this book will be very informative for me and may raise awareness for ocd and related disorders

    • @satirick__5
      @satirick__5 4 роки тому +3

      It is not that bad.
      It is great if you were right.

  • @pietrocelano23
    @pietrocelano23 6 років тому +389

    So, where are the turtles? I heard that there might be turtles.

    • @vlogbrothers
      @vlogbrothers  6 років тому +158

      The vast majority of turtles in the novel are non-literal, I'm sad to say. -John

    • @miriamrosemary9110
      @miriamrosemary9110 6 років тому +12

      No turtles, just a reference to a philosophical topic on logic and infinity. Look it up :)

    • @doyouseestroberries
      @doyouseestroberries 6 років тому +11

      "vast majority." At least one actual turtle confirmed!

    • @kentonhuff2177
      @kentonhuff2177 6 років тому +12

      There might be turtles is my favorite band.

    • @saikogrrl
      @saikogrrl 6 років тому

      Kenton Huff 😂

  • @nehathejedi4962
    @nehathejedi4962 6 років тому +629

    "Anybody can look at you. It's quite rare to find someone who sees the same world you see."
    This book shows a lot of promise!

  • @jugarcia1212
    @jugarcia1212 6 років тому +415

    "Sometimes I wondered why she liked me, or at least tolerated me. Why any of them did. Even I found myself annoying."
    I'm a very talkative person. Someone who always had trouble making friends, because I'd always be the person who put more effort into the friendship. The friendships were always mostly one sided. I was closer to that person than they were to me. They were my best friend, and I was nowhere near theirs.
    And that thought, that quote, is one that has plagued me for the almost 11 and a half years I've been in school. That my presence, my personality, or my conversation annoyed them. That they simply pretended to be my friend out of politeness. That they only tolerated me. No matter how many times my friends have assured me that that was not the case, I've always doubted that. These are people I've known for 5 and a half years, and I still regularly think that I'm annoying to them.
    Thank you John for expressing that thought, that constant fear in such a straightforward way. Hopefully, other people in a similar situation will see that and relate to it (I'm sure they will). And hopefully, the people on the other side of that friendship will see this and understand why the other person (like me) is constantly so worried about that statement being true.
    Thank you.

    • @amybach1
      @amybach1 6 років тому +4

      Julia Garcia I feel this

    • @mlane95126
      @mlane95126 6 років тому

      +

    • @ahobbit1273
      @ahobbit1273 6 років тому +8

      I can relate to that so much. A childhood of calling someone my best friend when I knew her own best friend was someone else has now caused me to never label anyone as being my best friend, no matter how long I've known them. And adding to that a childhood of constantly being called annoying, I'm now hesitant to bother people too much out of fear that I'm being obnoxious to them and returning to my childhood proclivity of being "the annoying girl".

    • @aditimelkote2757
      @aditimelkote2757 6 років тому +4

      +Julia Garcia I understand, honestly. That line and your explanation really hit me hard, because I'm in the same situation myself and wonder about it quite a bit.

    • @erinbosbury4605
      @erinbosbury4605 6 років тому +3

      YOU PUT MY BRAIN INTO WORDS WOWOWOW

  • @cutiepiglete
    @cutiepiglete 6 років тому +436

    When are you ever going to narrate your own audiobook? I could listen to your voice all day.

    • @evalynn1863
      @evalynn1863 4 роки тому +13

      I literally looked up the audio book ready to buy it only to find it was narrated by someone else and was completely disappointed.

    • @francescakyanda9182
      @francescakyanda9182 3 роки тому +20

      He has a podcast called The Anthropocene Reviewed that I listen to because his voice is so calming

    • @exoticallyki
      @exoticallyki 3 роки тому +4

      On dftba.com you can buy the TFiOS audiobook read by John :)

    • @taniabarg
      @taniabarg 3 роки тому +5

      I was going to comment this! I somehow would feel more comforted if I listened to him read this book because it would make me feel less alone (does that make sense LOL)
      But I don't want someone else's narration

    • @cutiepiglete
      @cutiepiglete 3 роки тому +2

      @@francescakyanda9182 I love that podcast and that's exactly why I love listening to it (not to mention John's reviews are genuinely interesting too).

  • @reealexasuerto2880
    @reealexasuerto2880 6 років тому +294

    "...anybody can look at you, its quite rare to find someone who sees the same world you see"

  • @TheSisicool
    @TheSisicool 6 років тому +179

    "My boobs sweat"
    -John Green, (2017)
    Edit: To say that I loved the chapter would be an understatement, because this, put simply, was refreshing. It somehow seemed perfectly natural that John was narrating the story until he read the aforementioned line and I snapped back to the reality that the protagonist is Aza, not John.

    • @j.a.snyder7416
      @j.a.snyder7416 6 років тому +1

      TheSisicool That, and the fact that Aza is drinking Dr. Pepper-if it was John it would be Diet Dr. Pepper. 😁

  • @anotherbloodyfeminist3272
    @anotherbloodyfeminist3272 6 років тому +52

    I have OCD and this is the first thing I've heard that accurately describes it.

  • @linty_fresh
    @linty_fresh 6 років тому +70

    This is awesome. Really raw and a little uncomfortable and REAL. I have OCD and generalised anxiety, and I'm really lucky to be on medications that are helping me to function through and come out of my thought spirals. But I still have them, and I remember having to live with them constantly under my skin, right in the corner of my eye, itching at me in the worst way to the point that it felt like thinking about these unsettling itching thoughts was my entire existence. All while I'm trying to listen to people, or have a conversation, or do my chores, or even put on my shoes. And it's so hard to explain to people why it's hard and why you can't stop thinking about it and that no this is not the same as wanting things to be symmetrical or tidy. So thank you! This is a really real representation of what anxiety/OCD can feel like, and I'm grateful to be represented. Looking forward to reading your book!

    • @vlogbrothers
      @vlogbrothers  6 років тому +28

      That description of the experience really, really resonates with me. -John

  • @jordanrenae5131
    @jordanrenae5131 6 років тому +810

    John, i am actually crying now. As someone who has suffered with OCD for all of my young adult life, it touches me to hear it all explained in the way you have written it. I am so grateful for this, and I honestly cannot wait until October 10th

    • @kattiahrichardson5547
      @kattiahrichardson5547 6 років тому +6

      Jordan Renae as someone who also suffers with OCD I also cannot wait. The day looks way too far. The way he describes it is something I can't do, and I'm glad someone can so it helps me.
      If that makes any sense.🙈

    • @songfreak1745
      @songfreak1745 6 років тому +3

      +
      Would you say it's an accurate-ish depiction? I need to understand (not just cognitively) OCD more so I'm hoping this book will help.

    • @kattiahrichardson5547
      @kattiahrichardson5547 6 років тому +5

      Muirsa from what I heard and know about it, I do believe it will have great OCD rep, especially since John has it as well :)

    • @Monk018_CS
      @Monk018_CS 6 років тому +14

      I think that the way that John generally describes it is pretty spot on. These awful thought spirals often occur, where all you can think about it one thing. Like, you may have locked your car, you know you have locked your car, but then you can't get it out of your head that your car isn't locked. Then you have to go outside and lock the car like 10 times to convince yourself.

    • @mlane95126
      @mlane95126 6 років тому +1

      +

  • @snowyyyyyyyyyyyyy
    @snowyyyyyyyyyyyyy 6 років тому +495

    On episode 45 of Dear Hank and John you said that you new novel would be composed entirely of emojis. How dare you lie to us.

    • @vlogbrothers
      @vlogbrothers  6 років тому +153

      I'm sorry. I look forward to the emoji translation, though. I'm sure my emoji translator will do an excellent job. -John

    • @CygnusGD
      @CygnusGD 6 років тому +10

      I would buy the emoji version of Turtles.

    • @sarahgrin
      @sarahgrin 6 років тому +4

      Hey! A recent episode of the podcast 99% Invisible did a story about creating new emojis, and then they came out with a "emoji translation" of that podcast. Here's a link!
      99percentinvisible.org/episode/person-lotus-position/

    • @nerdommeetsboy
      @nerdommeetsboy 6 років тому +1

      that ep gave me anxiety about the book actually being written in emojis and whether I'd actually still want to read it

    • @nerdommeetsboy
      @nerdommeetsboy 6 років тому +1

      although I think there might be a YA novel written entirely in emojis out there? there's certainly some written in messages

  • @NotBulletProof245
    @NotBulletProof245 6 років тому +252

    Your last book, which was about a sixteen-year-old girl, I read when I was eleven and now your new book, which is about a sixteen-year-old girl, I'm going to read when I'm sixteen. So basically, this is going to be a girl the same age as Hazel and written by the same author as Hazel, but she's probably going to seem younger to me (sixteen sounds a whole lot closer to adulthood when you're 11). Interesting.

    • @scisarah3770
      @scisarah3770 4 роки тому +28

      I don't know why but your statement that "sixteen sounds a whole lot closer to adulthood when you're 11" really resonates with me. I used to look at High Schoolers as a child and think they were cut from the same fabric as adults, and now that I am here I do not feel as though that is the case. I used to believe in this great distinction between child and adult, and now I don't think it will be any more than just another birthday. Anyways, sorry to get philosophical a bit there but I like the way you worded that. It is really true!

    • @evalynn1863
      @evalynn1863 4 роки тому +15

      The kicker is that one of the biggest parts about being an adult is realizing no adults have their shit together. We're just all faking it to various degrees, trying to grasp any semblance of happiness while it lasts. That's why kindness is important to remember. We're all just trying to survive. Being kind makes that a little easier.

    • @Jessica-ix5yi
      @Jessica-ix5yi 4 роки тому +16

      this is late, but "sixteen sounds a whole lot closer to adulthood when you're 11" sounds like a line out of a john green novel I will spend nights twisting my mind and over resonating with that one simple but incredible beautiful and truthful line. So thank you for that.

  • @hitikasainiyt
    @hitikasainiyt 6 років тому +165

    Anyone else listening to this after reading the book?

  • @albw8805
    @albw8805 6 років тому +292

    Sometimes I actually believe I'm a character in a book. Not the star, just an extra. Just there.

    • @panhachea9300
      @panhachea9300 6 років тому +1

      Minty Bliss me all the time

    • @AshtoledoArt
      @AshtoledoArt 6 років тому +5

      You should read "The rest of us just live here" :) its so good!

    • @wfd87
      @wfd87 6 років тому +2

      In reality we are all part of a big book with many little characters, akin to Infinite Jest. (PS this might be the most pretentious thing I have ever typed on the internet.)

    • @Ikiratuki
      @Ikiratuki 6 років тому +2

      If you thought you were the star you'd do good to check your ego.

    • @flawedmind
      @flawedmind 6 років тому +3

      I figure I'm the star of my own story and either much smaller or nonexistent in everyone else's (so all stories but one). I figure it's basically how it works, though it's just how I think of it, and I guess it helps me feel human. Sorry for being long-winded.

  • @jackiehouse529
    @jackiehouse529 6 років тому +162

    "Life is a story told about you, not one that you tell."
    Wow, that was really deep for the first page.

    • @RalphDratman
      @RalphDratman 6 років тому +1

      But that is no 16 year old talking. It's John. I love it.

    • @vercingetorix3839
      @vercingetorix3839 6 років тому +3

      John Green has a way with words. Also who the f is Hank?

    • @Erebus4801
      @Erebus4801 6 років тому +2

      Vercingetorix if you are new, Hank is John's brother and the other half of this channel

    • @AishwaryaNair10
      @AishwaryaNair10 6 років тому

      Pakin Lertthamanon nerdfighteria.info/article/1079

    • @AishwaryaNair10
      @AishwaryaNair10 6 років тому +1

      Vercingetorix Hank is the spider chilling in the corner of my living room.

  • @deinodinosuchus
    @deinodinosuchus Рік тому +3

    as an autistic person with adhd, i resonate with this so hard. i’ve mainly heard it’s about OCD, and i haven’t done enough research to tell if i’m close to having it, but i feel the narrator’s overstimulation so incredibly hard and the spiraling thoughts along with the run-on, stream-of-consciousness sort of perspective. i love this so much and now i need to read this

  • @JoysonDeck
    @JoysonDeck 6 років тому +43

    "you think you're the painter, but you're the canvas"
    preordered tatwd the second i was able to, and this just makes me a million times more excited for october 10th! forget halloween, this'll be the highlight of my october!

    • @MattPalka
      @MattPalka 5 років тому +1

      This analogy is my favorite metaphor ever. Like we're not the dancer in life, we are a dance of life.

  • @marycl4709
    @marycl4709 6 років тому +436

    Well call me turtle, because I'm all the way down for this.
    (I love this, John. I'm a neuroscientist and have only come to know OCD through the stories of others and the less verbose microscope. Thank you so much for opening another invaluable window/insight into it! Best wishes from a long-time nerdfighter :))

    • @fossilfighters101
      @fossilfighters101 6 років тому +61

      "Well call me turtle, because I'm all the way down for this."
      Have a cookie for that awesome line.

    • @knevelchen
      @knevelchen 6 років тому +1

      Mary Cl +

    • @marycl4709
      @marycl4709 6 років тому +2

      Just doing my duty, fossilfighters101 ;) (but thank you for the cookie!)

    • @MsDogleaf
      @MsDogleaf Рік тому

      Yes this is really cool

  • @karaabelll
    @karaabelll 6 років тому +163

    "It's quite rare to find someone that sees the same world you see."
    I love this. John Green your mind is beautiful.

  • @thenly3
    @thenly3 6 років тому +316

    How can anyone dislike this? This was a beautiful way to start off my day. Thank you John :)

  • @shannonhensley2942
    @shannonhensley2942 6 років тому +69

    It's very deep. I keep finding my self trying to get out of ya novels but then john makes another gold mine and then I feel like I'm in a comfy home surrounded by warm fuzzy things and I really don't want to leave.

    • @ahobbit1273
      @ahobbit1273 6 років тому +11

      I hate the idea that YA novels are something that someone needs to stop reading once they're a "real" adult. Some YA novels are amazing. Their characters might be teenagers, and teenagers might be the target audience, but it's reductive to books like this to say they're "just for kids". They can be amazing novels in their own right, and teenagers can be much more intelligent than adults give them credit for. Besides, in the YA genre as a whole, sometimes they're just enjoyable books, and people shouldn't be shamed for reading something that gives them enjoyment.

    • @unicornlover3938
      @unicornlover3938 6 років тому +1

      Shannon Hensley I finished all of his books in a matter of a month and I've been waiting I'm so happy about this book

  • @megannancy23
    @megannancy23 6 років тому +198

    I came for turtles. I stayed for gut bacteria.
    In all seriousness, though, this is an incredible first chapter and I am so excited to read it.

  • @stargazer209
    @stargazer209 6 років тому +291

    I always found it comforting that your body, is your body plus pounds worth of bacteria. It's like you are a mini ecosystem.

    • @vlogbrothers
      @vlogbrothers  6 років тому +92

      I am glad that someone is able to find this idea comforting. ;) -John

    • @danielcampos1715
      @danielcampos1715 6 років тому +7

      And even the cells that form you are just a bunch of similar individuals that strike a deal to live harmoniously and die when the've lived long enough.

    • @perplexedprimate
      @perplexedprimate 6 років тому

      I find the emerging view of everything as ecosystems one of the main sources of hope for the world: ua-cam.com/video/tMSlhpRhaKQ/v-deo.html

    • @stargazer209
      @stargazer209 6 років тому +3

      daniel campos It's like they really care about your well-being and are rooting for you to thrive

    • @TracyLayden
      @TracyLayden 6 років тому +1

      @stargazer209 I really like that thought, about them all rooting for you!

  • @FlameoColdman
    @FlameoColdman 6 років тому +30

    First thought upon hearing the ending: "I see Wolf in White Van got to you, too."
    First thought early on: "He really nailed the lack of agency that you feel when you're in a US public high school."

  • @denensammacellen
    @denensammacellen 4 роки тому +12

    “I was somebody’s something”
    That sentence is just amazing!

  • @SerpentStare
    @SerpentStare 6 років тому +161

    The best advertisement for a book is hearing its opening. Good idea. I am many times more likely to seek out this story now.
    Also, I appreciate hearing the voice of a protagonist who clearly gets thought spirals worse than I do.

  • @rapnsee
    @rapnsee 6 років тому +26

    I cannot stop crying. Anyone who suffers from mental illness of any kind: we love you, your friends and family love you, and all is well. Stay safe. People care.

  • @bunnyfantastic
    @bunnyfantastic 4 роки тому +9

    I got so psyched when I saw "Turtles All the Way Down" at my local Meijer's. (I'm buying ASAP) I was like - "It's. John. Green's. Book. *cue scream*" It was so hard to explain to my friends because they had no idea about you or Nerdfighteria, but it was a very happy moment for me.

  • @cheencheen
    @cheencheen 6 років тому +26

    I feel like I would pay for John Green himself to read his entire book to me. LOL

  • @elizabethsmith6477
    @elizabethsmith6477 6 років тому +623

    I feel as though you just reached inside my mind, pulled out the brown sludge, and extremely poetically put it on paper. I don't know if I've ever felt this exposed and simultaneously understood in my whole life.

  • @brigittedances
    @brigittedances 6 років тому +45

    "Thought spiral" is such a perfect way to describe it

  • @hallieeramos
    @hallieeramos 6 років тому +32

    I love this, John. Not just because you write in such a beautiful, yet relatable manner. Or even because the way you wrote highlights the reality of mental disorders, and you did not try to play it down. I love this because I can feel it. I do not struggle with the mental things you or Aza do, but this made me feel it. I feel like I understand people who struggle deeply with mental disorders more than I ever have. Art is self expression, and I feel like this is your greatest self expression yet. Thank you, John.

  • @theGhostSteward
    @theGhostSteward 3 місяці тому +1

    I find this book in a strange, almost closing, store and I love it. It was such a find to be like "Hey! It's John!" Now I regret not buying it but definetly will.
    I feel like she sees the world I see and- as an autistic struggling with oversharing- this is so refreshing. ❤❤

  • @jaychoi2450
    @jaychoi2450 6 років тому +272

    THAT. WAS AWESOME. It seems unachievable for me to describe how I felt, but I may as well give it a try.
    I could feel the inability of Aza to escape her thought spiral, how she felt like she was being forced to do things despite her knowing it's no good / use doing so, which combined greatly with the author-and-role stuff (sorry for that injustice).
    As you (John) said last time, it's impossible to talk about the thing in perfectly objective way, but only how one perceives it.
    But your description of OCD was so detailed and to the point that I could FEEL IT(although maybe not perfectly).
    Truly amazing job, John; thank you for this jewel and all other things you have done.

    • @vlogbrothers
      @vlogbrothers  6 років тому +27

      Thanks, Jay. That means a lot to me. I hope you enjoy the rest of the book, too! -John

    • @jaychoi2450
      @jaychoi2450 6 років тому +11

      vlogbrothers
      FRENCH THE LLAMA YOU ACTUALLY REPLIED
      OH THIS IS THE BEST
      I WAS SO HAPPY I WOKE UP MY SISTER AND BRAGGED
      GOODNESS GRACIOUS
      I'M SO HAPPY

    • @RainaRamsay
      @RainaRamsay 6 років тому +3

      The greatest accomplishment of my life to date is a Facebook comment that Hank replied to. I totally feel you, Jay. ::fistbump::

    • @jaychoi2450
      @jaychoi2450 6 років тому +3

      Raina Ramsay
      Yesss I'm not alone
      ::fistbump::

    • @jaychoi2450
      @jaychoi2450 6 років тому +2

      TheRedstoneToaster
      Oh you

  • @Razbeariez
    @Razbeariez 6 років тому +1103

    Ah! It's so interesting to hear anxieties, and panic attacks, and and all that stuff from a different perspective than my own. I constantly found myself thinking, I know exactly what this feels like, but also this is completely different subject matter and manifestations than my own. (For anyone curious, I personally, deal with generalized anxiety and occasional bouts of depression.)

    • @mlane95126
      @mlane95126 6 років тому

      +

    • @aleksfakename7105
      @aleksfakename7105 6 років тому +9

      Brynley Louise I am the exact same way, your comment makes me feel more sane :)

    • @james4thedoctor482
      @james4thedoctor482 6 років тому

      +

    • @symanthahoward5238
      @symanthahoward5238 6 років тому +4

      Brynley Louise it took me about 4 minutes in to realize that's what was happening. It seemed so comfortable and familiar but then I recognized that it was only the feeling that was familiar, not the spirals.

    • @danseb6415
      @danseb6415 6 років тому

      +

  • @alaha8349
    @alaha8349 6 років тому +178

    guess who's got two thumbs and is gonna buy that book so fricken fast?
    this gal
    (imagine me gesturing towards myself with my thumbs)

  • @nikkoleadams4677
    @nikkoleadams4677 6 років тому +8

    This is the first character of yours that, instead of wishing I could be like them, I am like them. I love it.

  • @winter.soldier721
    @winter.soldier721 6 років тому +352

    That. Was. FANTASTIC.

  • @iBeauty96
    @iBeauty96 6 років тому +172

    This is the most woke 16 year old I've ever heard

    • @gryein7223
      @gryein7223 6 років тому +32

      Sarah Torrella I think a lot of people with anxiety think like this, regardless of age

  • @coena9377
    @coena9377 4 роки тому +3

    “Why is life so much easier for everyone else?” I asked.
    He thought a moment before answering “Because living isn’t something we do, it’s something we have done to us”.
    That didn’t answer my question, but it did replace it with the probably even harder question “why has life been done to me the way it has?”

  • @notjamin
    @notjamin 6 років тому +116

    I really like that Daisy said "and people who do not identify as ladies or gentlemen". Non-binary inclusion, yay!

    • @doomgirl5341
      @doomgirl5341 3 роки тому +10

      I just put a big smile when I read that part : )

  • @zawadiwilliams4639
    @zawadiwilliams4639 6 років тому +638

    This is my first John Green book cycle as a Nerdifghter, and I am extremely excited.

  • @FrontalBeep
    @FrontalBeep 6 років тому +469

    1. someone please loop John saying "my boobs sweat" and make it a song or something.
    2. John, you write the most amazing, precocious, slightly annoying but otherwise loveable characters!
    3. I know that if you ever need a punishment for video lenght, my suggestion will be for you to write a Chewbacca love story that you have to read out loud for us :)

  • @JesterPear3737
    @JesterPear3737 6 років тому +14

    I would like John Green to read me an action-sci-fi novel. His voice, almost bored in the way he measures every sentence before speaking it in a tone that leads you to ignore how it sounds and focus on the words, is perfect for his own style of writing. He writes in a leisurely, expository tone which is perfect for oblique fandom references and really getting inside the mind of a teenager. But I want him to read me something action-packed, punchy and irreverent. Something without the casually sacred atmosphere and frequent navel-pondering. Something completely different from his usual work. Like The Enemy by Charlie Higson, where the action is in-your-face and tension is palpable. Or is this just me?

  • @courtneykates755
    @courtneykates755 6 років тому

    This book is one of the most meaning pieces of text I believe I will ever have the pleasure of encountering. It felt like someone finally understood what it is like to be so fearful of your surroundings that you know may be harmless but can't help but to believe they aren't. There was a song included that I believed up until I read this book only existed between my parents and I, and when I heard it, I burst into tears. The dialogue and relationship between Daisy and Aza felt almost painfully personal and it truly felt real. This book is a modern work of genius and I hope that everyone gets a fraction of the enjoyment reading this novel that I did.

  • @queenybeany
    @queenybeany 6 років тому +120

    DROP EVERYTHING YOU'RE DOING, FOLKS.

    • @vlogbrothers
      @vlogbrothers  6 років тому +56

      NOBODY PANIC. -John

    • @queenybeany
      @queenybeany 6 років тому +14

      Too late, friend. Too late.

    • @googolplexbyte
      @googolplexbyte 6 років тому +1

      The thing about "NOBODY PANIC", is I can panic faster than you can say that.

    • @lignusungil
      @lignusungil 6 років тому +3

      DROP EVERYTHING, YOU'RE DYING, FOLKS.

    • @aleksfakename7105
      @aleksfakename7105 6 років тому

      vlogbrothers Panic is difficult to avoid, but dropping everything is darn near impossible when you have something about your book.

  • @AlexBodyParts
    @AlexBodyParts 6 років тому +422

    IM ALL THE WAY DOWN WITH THIS

  • @daswintermaedchen07
    @daswintermaedchen07 6 років тому

    Okay, so you are never going to read this but I just want to thank you. I have been struggling with my mental health for years and I have always been suffering in silence, which has been killing me slowly and I have probably reached my worst this time around. I finished TATWD last night and I realized that maybe it's time for me to get help. You got help, Aza got help , so why should I keep doing this to myself? So today I wrote dozens of emails to several therapists in my area, asking for their help. Maybe one of them will help me get my shit together after 21 years.
    Thank you so much. You saved my life.

  • @plumsweater7947
    @plumsweater7947 2 роки тому

    I remember very vividly the day this video came out. I had just started at my first medium term job a few weeks prior. I was on the way there, and I put on my cheap earbuds and listened to this video.
    What struck me so deeply about it was that you wrote so unapologetically about the ways mental illness affects you. Obviously, novels are not to be consumed to analyse the lives of the people who write them, but it was inspiring to me. Truly writing about what you know, in the context of fiction, was something I felt ashamed of.
    Later that day, I began to write about my own experiences with mental health, in the form of a story about identity and self worth etc.
    This video made me pick up writing again. Maybe not entirely, but it gave me such a strong push. I'd always enjoyed writing as a kid, but when I got into my later teens I started to give up on the whole thing.
    The story itself didn't exactly pan out. but it laid the groundwork for the story I am currently working on, which is very near completion! Whether that means trying to get it published or not, I don't know. But I have enjoyed the process so much. The way I understood myself more as I write has been invaluable. Writing has been very fun! Like, not every single day or anything, but certainly most. This video in a roundabout way led me to the conclusion that I have to like what I am writing, and I shouldn't write solely for the imagined enjoyment of others (which may seem like an obvious conclusion but I was 19 at the time). If I never watched this video, I really don't know if I would have made writing as important a part of my life as it has been these last few years.
    Anyway, all that to say, thanks John. This video changed my life for the better. And watching it almost 5 years later, the memory came rushing back like it was yesterday.

  • @avj8833
    @avj8833 6 років тому +75

    I have a test in college tomorrow and John posts this. I have a conflict of interests.

    • @pegy6384
      @pegy6384 6 років тому +22

      You will need a 10 minute study break at some point, and this will be waiting for you.

    • @taliafore1578
      @taliafore1578 6 років тому +1

      Av J ahahahaha same here. Someone help me stop procrastinating please

    • @costanzarosamongioi5989
      @costanzarosamongioi5989 6 років тому +1

      Same here, but I managed to wait till evening (now) to check this out 💪

    • @avj8833
      @avj8833 6 років тому

      Talia Føre it's a hard life bud

  • @LeBeauFred23
    @LeBeauFred23 6 років тому +24

    As a 24 years old man with anxiety disorder and as a hypochondriac, I strongly relate to this. Thank you for this extremely accurate representation!

    • @LeBeauFred23
      @LeBeauFred23 6 років тому

      Ill be buying your bool by the way, for sure ;p

  • @bidaubadeadieu
    @bidaubadeadieu 6 років тому +11

    I have long said that I like John Green as a person and a UA-camr, but that his writing has never done much for me, but this first chapter really hooked me. After not really enjoying tfios and not really getting what the hype was I wasn't even sure I was going to read John's next book, but I think I'll definitely have to pick up a copy from the library.

  • @cupidrockz1
    @cupidrockz1 5 років тому +2

    "I mean, anybody can look at you. It's quite rare to find someone who sees the same world you see."
    my favorite line!

  • @52flyingbicycles
    @52flyingbicycles 6 років тому +270

    Hmm, the character in the book wants to be the author of her own life, but she's not because John is. John made a video about OCD keeping him from being the author of his own life, is it just turtles all the way down? Does this book get super meta?

    • @crashcourse
      @crashcourse 6 років тому +83

      Thomas Urech no more meta than you want it to be! -John (accidentally signed in as crashcourse)

    • @alliefurlong486
      @alliefurlong486 6 років тому +17

      Thomas Urech What's cool is, no matter who the "real author" is, they share this disorder that seems to take over the mind and run a course that neither "author" can control. In the end, maybe the real author is OCD, but both John and Aza are fighting it for control of that pen.

    • @redlion145
      @redlion145 6 років тому +2

      Turtles indeed. Taking a mytheme (new one on me) as the basis for the title of your book is pretty meta. I hope I just taught John a new word. It pays him back for his history crash course. Maybe just an episode, they were really dense.

    • @Kaalyn_HOW
      @Kaalyn_HOW 6 років тому +15

      I feel like John being signed in as the wrong "author" is another meta layer to pull apart :)

    • @planetsoccer99
      @planetsoccer99 6 років тому +2

      Someone's been reading some Borges

  • @DrCBonner
    @DrCBonner 6 років тому +71

    I think his Michael project should actually be pictures of people named RYAN

  • @meghanabhange13
    @meghanabhange13 6 років тому +2

    SO MANY THINGS FROM THE PODCASTS. There are times when you can relate to a story and there are times when it feels like someone tore a page out of your diary and is reading it to you. CAN"T WAIT FOR THE BOOK.

  • @Mostlydedperson2251
    @Mostlydedperson2251 Рік тому +1

    As he read, I fell in love the way you fall asleep: slowly, then all at once - John Green

  • @turtles8081
    @turtles8081 6 років тому +130

    I can't believe I was in his book title!

    • @vlogbrothers
      @vlogbrothers  6 років тому +126

      Thanks for being part of the title, turtles. I am sorry that you are not really, like, in the book as physical creatures much. -John

    • @turtles8081
      @turtles8081 6 років тому +20

      vlogbrothers it's okay but thanks for making a book for a really dedicated fan behind my internet persona and I'm more thankful for making my day.Sincerely, just another nerdfighter

    • @mavie3716
      @mavie3716 6 років тому +9

      turtles this convo is so cute haha

  • @kiya12309
    @kiya12309 6 років тому +140

    That reference to the parasites is so Dear Hank and John.

    • @kiya12309
      @kiya12309 6 років тому +30

      Or as I prefer to call it, Dear John and Hank.

    • @milissamackey7231
      @milissamackey7231 6 років тому +5

      Now with actual sponsors

    • @hazabee
      @hazabee 6 років тому +5

      I imagine it isn't a reference exactly. It's something that's probably been in John's mind, so he talked about it on the podcast and wrote it into the book.

    • @madisonprice5677
      @madisonprice5677 6 років тому

      kiya12309 yes!

    • @MarinaFerreiras
      @MarinaFerreiras 6 років тому

      kiya12309 right

  • @CallMeMargo
    @CallMeMargo 6 років тому +8

    I feel like someone's taken a piece of my heart and brain and put it on paper to be spoken out loud. Oh my gosh.

  • @heyimmashark9030
    @heyimmashark9030 6 років тому

    I don't exhibit any physical signs of anxiety other than an overwhelming urge to forget with everything and eat a lot, but this still made me cry. Hearing the programmed, thought out, perfect line of thoughts was too much like myself. The idea that only the author can change the story, and the author just lets it happen, makes them suffer. It's beautiful and sad. I would love to be able to put my thoughts into words like that

  • @benjulesrun9057
    @benjulesrun9057 6 років тому +202

    did you just make your fictional character suspect that theyre fictional in the opening line? Im not even mad

  • @Julika7
    @Julika7 6 років тому +21

    When John first said Aza, I understood Hazel.

  • @travisyanes3166
    @travisyanes3166 Рік тому

    Finished this wonderful novel a month ago. Mr. Green does a wonderful job, at purtraying what it is like to suffer with mental illness. I have been a fan for years, Mr. Green, but to read your book, it became a space where I could see patterns of myself but from an onlookers perpective. The way you capture how quickly obsevive thinking can send one spirally down, to the empty void that is depression and self loathing. Her inner voice rings through book into the readers imagination almost to the point of reality, have the ready to scream ' Ava just breathe' Lastly, I just wanted to say thank you.
    TY

  • @petermysels8644
    @petermysels8644 6 років тому

    Your prose is phenomenal. Your ability to jump into the shoes of a teenager from any walk of life and speak as if it's your autobiography is unmatched. Can't wait for the book, John.

  • @fanboy3430
    @fanboy3430 6 років тому +48

    I feel like I can already tell that this is gonna change the way I think

  • @ninamarie177
    @ninamarie177 6 років тому +160

    After watching the first three minutes I have to pause and comment because I'm wondering weather "Dear Hank and John" has influenced this book, or whether this book has influenced the podcast.

    • @vlogbrothers
      @vlogbrothers  6 років тому +136

      The book influenced the podcast. Or, more generally, my own fears and experiences influenced both the book and the podcast. -John

    • @sugarthekitty8689
      @sugarthekitty8689 6 років тому +2

      There's definitely both in all of his work. And also, things in his life influencing both his writing and his other public creations like the podcast.

    • @ninamarie177
      @ninamarie177 6 років тому +6

      vlogbrothers thank you for the reply! As someone who generally worries too much and gets caught up in thought spirals sometimes, I'm really looking foreword to reading the book as soon as it comes out. The first chapter made me a lot more exited because I find myself relating to the narrator.

    • @songfreak1745
      @songfreak1745 6 років тому

      ahhhhh

    • @Kaelytraec
      @Kaelytraec 6 років тому +4

      I wonder if we'll see any references to Cheyenne Wyoming in the book.

  • @kkaylaamarie
    @kkaylaamarie 6 років тому

    About a month or two before this video came out I was diagnosed with an annoying but non-life-threatening heart condition which has caused me to experience health-related and existential anxiety/panic attacks for the first time in my life. I had no idea how debilitating they could be. This book has come at a perfect time. Thank you John!

  • @TaffyPanda
    @TaffyPanda 6 років тому

    I got Turtles All The Way Down for Christmas after I begged and begged my parents for the book, and I was hooked immediately. Being a reader, it's always interesting to read a boom like this, and as I read on I felt so connected to the story and the character. By the time I finished the book, I got the same aura of wanting to re-read the book over and over, which was the same aura that I got from The Fault in Our Stars (I have read this masterpiece over and over again). These kinds of books motivate me to write about specified issues and it's what makes me happy to be human. I hope he continues to write aspiring novels for the community, and I hope to be engaged every time :)

  • @fanboy3430
    @fanboy3430 6 років тому +26

    I think now I understand the title and the cover

  • @xThePinkApple
    @xThePinkApple 6 років тому +339

    I'm gonna take a wild guess here and say the bacteria thoughts came from that episode of Dear Hank and John where John found out about that being a thing and freaked out and also talked about it in the next episode. I really like this chapter

    • @RainaRamsay
      @RainaRamsay 6 років тому +5

      It did remind me of those episodes

    • @crawfordbrown75
      @crawfordbrown75 6 років тому

      xThePinkApple Was thinking the exact same thing!

    • @saber1epee0
      @saber1epee0 6 років тому +24

      I think you may have it a bit backwards... I'm pretty sure John's been freaked out by the bacteria-count-thing for much of his Adult life, and has used the Pod and now set a full novel as part of expressing it.
      DFTBA. ++

    • @alicattor1469
      @alicattor1469 6 років тому +5

      Yeah this is more so coming from the fact that John has OCD and struggles with thought-spirals with almost the same topics (He talks a bit about them in this video from 100 days: ua-cam.com/video/CcylG7ZuQb8/v-deo.html )

    • @7894561276
      @7894561276 6 років тому

      The latest updates are here. shortlink.im/R4lYx

  • @elizabethg2076
    @elizabethg2076 6 років тому

    My God, John Green, if by some chance in this aimless world you read over these words, you must know what an absolute hero you are to aspiring writers. You speak the true voice of us teenagers, who, let's be honest, spend a good amount of their time thinking about why we exist and how, and less on the latest gossip. Your vocabulary is stellar, you speak a voice uniquely yours, and you remain an example of how we can all succeed and strive for education. With that, all I can say is thank you. Thank you so much for the words. I can't wait to read the rest!

  • @katyhepburn6657
    @katyhepburn6657 6 років тому

    THIS IS HOW YOU WRITE A BOOK ON ANXIETY! THIS IS NOT ROMANTICIZING ANXIETY OR ODC IT IS GIVING YOU THE EVERYDAY OF WHAT ITS LIKE! IM SO HAPPY THAT JOHN PUT IT INTO THE WORDS SO MANY PEOPLE WHO HAVE IT CANT!

  • @mengjunwei1169
    @mengjunwei1169 6 років тому +44

    Oh I get it. So like Azel has OCD and it is that idea that has defined her way of thinking and also her way of life. like acting on her own will she decides to not talk to anyone because she doesn't want to. But she does not want to not on her own free will, but rather because her OCD forces her to focus and think in thought spirals, endless, constricting paths that really end up going nowhere, so she cannot will her will.
    Azel wants be be normal and talk to her friends about art and gossip and stuff but the problem is she can't because all she is forced to think about is the germs growing in her stomach. In a sense she is a spectator in her own life, unable to even think about what she wants, much less do what she wants.
    it makes you wonder: how much of Azel is really herself and how much of her is her OCD? If she can't even think, cant even will her wills, she must be fictional. she is a canvas that gets painted on not only by exterior forces, but also by herself, by her OCD
    She pretends to be the author of her story because she has to, but really it is her OCD and Thought spirals that chooses how her story is told.
    Love the first chapter and can't wait ready how Azel realizes her identity!

    • @sarahburgess7306
      @sarahburgess7306 6 років тому +21

      Yeah and isn't it cool how when she breaks the skin of her finger it makes a mark on her FINGERPRINT? aka a symbol of identity? Perhaps representing how her OCD is inextricably a part of who she is?

    • @arushiseth3979
      @arushiseth3979 6 років тому +2

      Sarah Burgess how i love critical reading! :') dftba!!!

  • @alliefurlong486
    @alliefurlong486 6 років тому +76

    Warning: do not listen to this while eating. Especially if you are very suggestible and anxious.
    But this book sounds amazing so far. It feels like jumping into one on my friends minds.

    • @mehco-op9061
      @mehco-op9061 6 років тому +5

      Too late I was eating nachos with salsa and cheese.

    • @casserol2202
      @casserol2202 6 років тому +1

      cereal

    • @jacobturnage
      @jacobturnage 6 років тому +1

      the frozen chicken nuggets really got to me

  • @autumnrosedearborn8923
    @autumnrosedearborn8923 6 років тому

    I need to get your book, John. I've had panic disorder for 7 years, since I was 16, and I haven't read any book yet that properly explain what it's like to have anxiety. It's important for people with anxiety to read this book so they feel understood and not alone, but also important that everyone else reads it so they can understand what it's like living with anxiety. Anxiety disorder is a very misunderstood mental illness. People don't understand why we can't just "chill out", "calm down", "relax"... it's not hat easy. My friend who also has anxiety already read you book and was highly effected. She loved it, though, and recommended it to me. Great first chapter 💜

  • @clarap727
    @clarap727 6 років тому +5

    Seeing yourself as the canvas is so much more depressing than seeing yourself as the paint.
    I love this very much...I really want to know how it continues!

  • @chelsealeigh9203
    @chelsealeigh9203 6 років тому +37

    As someone largely on the other side of OCD that grew from a phobia, this does a better job of communicating what I have felt, than anything else I have ever encountered. I am glad I did not find it when I was younger; the panic that would have followed listening to or reading this would have been all-consuming. It is evocative, without doubt.
    I look forward to reading the rest! Thank you for writing this ♥️

  • @GabbyCamilleri
    @GabbyCamilleri 6 років тому +24

    JOHN I AM CRYING. I feel like I'm Aza. Your writing is so perfect and it was beautiful hearing you reading it. Thank you for sharing this with nerdfighteria!!!

    • @vlogbrothers
      @vlogbrothers  6 років тому +16

      Thank you, Gabby. I hope you like the rest of the book as well. -John

    • @GabbyCamilleri
      @GabbyCamilleri 6 років тому

      I can't wait it to read it, i've already pre-ordered it!! Thank you for everything

  • @demonsrun425
    @demonsrun425 6 років тому

    This book feels so much more personal than your others. This may seem like nothing coming from a throng of adoring comments from adoring fans, but I'm proud of you for opening up about yourself like that, and for putting your most secret self in the world to help other people. I'm proud.

  • @jessicawardlaw1821
    @jessicawardlaw1821 6 років тому +1

    "I wanted to say more, but the thoughts kept coming" and the spiraling is so spot on, personally. Because who actually craves unpleasant, negative thoughts at any inconvenient time? Well done, John! 👏🐢👏🐢

  • @miah5350
    @miah5350 6 років тому +113

    The place only properly crazy people get to go
    Cheyenne Wyoming

  • @lovemusic5310
    @lovemusic5310 6 років тому +67

    As always, being exposed to any part of one of your books has given me an overwhelming desire to drop everything and read said book. However, this is the first time this has occurred for me when I did not yet have access to the book, so all I can do is rewatch you read this chapter instead of doing my school work, because I know myself well enough to know that this will take less time than either contemplating what could be coming next in Turtles or the 8 hours I require to reread TFIOS... Basically, I'm obsessed with Turtles already... October still feels too far away. I love everything about this first chapter, and still maintain that I could listen to you read a phone book. Thanks for teasing the first chapter, but also how dare you torture us with the first chapter before we can acquire the entire masterpiece. Best wishes!

    • @sarahburgess7306
      @sarahburgess7306 6 років тому

      +

    • @hhhmlvv2073
      @hhhmlvv2073 6 років тому

      hahah you should feel better , I ' ll only receive the book at the end of the winter as a birthday gift xD Aaaaah it's amazing how an upcoming event can make one's day so much brighter and the next months so worth living !!!

  • @kayleemcdonald2047
    @kayleemcdonald2047 6 років тому +6

    This!!! I love the way you describe a spiral as not going down but going forever just tighter and tighter. THE VOCABULARY IS ALSO GORGEOUS

  • @brookew2709
    @brookew2709 6 років тому

    Thank you for sharing this with us, John. As a person who was severely abused to the point of psychological trauma for having a mental illness, it means so much to me that a writer such as yourself is taking the time to tell the story of a young woman with mental illness. I greatly appreciate your humanization of this character. People with mental illness are dehumanized both casually and tragically every day, and I have great hope that this book will take part in challenging that. Thank you from the depths of my heart.

  • @justtvalerie
    @justtvalerie 6 років тому +107

    Wow. That was such a realistic portrait of anxiety, it's crazy. I could feel myself growing nervous. I don't have that kind of anxiety (mine is more social than anything), but I completely understand the feeling. I can't wait to read the book!

  • @wednesdaybee5229
    @wednesdaybee5229 6 років тому +116

    French the llama that was awesome 🐢

  • @ninetozero920
    @ninetozero920 2 роки тому +1

    "Turtles are one of my favorite tastes. Not only that, but spirals taste amazing as well."

  • @lizmoss
    @lizmoss 6 років тому

    i LOVED it! so excited to read such a different book from you! the last line was so beautiful.

  • @caitlynjones2147
    @caitlynjones2147 6 років тому +27

    I know there are plenty of books that exist in the world that cover mental illness and OCD but holy. Shit. I am thrilled that someone with an audience as large as yours will be able to enlighten people on what OCD is like. It's so much more than checking locks and using hand sanitizer and I'm so SO excited to read this.
    Thank you for allowing the world to see a part of you that you may have preferred to keep hidden.
    ❤️💛💚💙💜

  • @flost108
    @flost108 6 років тому +105

    I wasn't gonna buy the book but i guess now I HAVE TO DAMN YOU

    • @Asummersdaydreamer14
      @Asummersdaydreamer14 6 років тому

      Or nag your local library until they have a copy you can check out. Someone back me up here because it's too early in the evening where I am at in the world for someone to have damnation thrown at her face.

    • @Pamsypam
      @Pamsypam 6 років тому +1

      Same

    • @lipimehta5337
      @lipimehta5337 6 років тому

      SAMEEEE

  • @paulisnatis
    @paulisnatis 6 років тому

    Very excited for this new book, John it sounds great. Really sounds like a story worth telling, glad you're back at it

  • @pantopia3518
    @pantopia3518 3 роки тому +2

    That was beautifully written. I last read one of your books some years ago and I’d forgotten how much I love your style

  • @sophiemagallanez3810
    @sophiemagallanez3810 6 років тому +122

    I made myself a peanut butter and jelly sandwich right before pressing play on this, and that was a mistake

    • @fugithegreat
      @fugithegreat 6 років тому +2

      Me toooooo! I was chewing mine as Aza was describing it...

    • @aliceroux7616
      @aliceroux7616 6 років тому +1

      fugithegreat me too

  • @iremderyacaglayan9008
    @iremderyacaglayan9008 6 років тому +148

    As a psychologist I love that the book is from a perspective of a mentally ill person! I know this book will not be only about her disorder which is great! Tfios made the point cancer kids are just kids, and maybe Tatwd will make the point of psychological disorders are just like physiological disorders. They don't define you, not unless you let them. John, this made me more excited about the book. DFTBA

  • @HeidiRK
    @HeidiRK 6 років тому

    I am so excited to buy your book soon and read it! I haven´t stoped thinking about it ever since it came out

  • @andreahernaiz9830
    @andreahernaiz9830 6 років тому

    This is the first book you've published since I started following you guys and I'm so excited❤️❤️❤️