Always loved Margaery. She had a way of getting what she wanted without threatening or killing anyone. Just manipulation, subtlety and seduction at its finest.
Margery was a really brilliant character. She had so much more to offer. They shouldn't have killed her so early. The Tyrells in general are probably the best family.
GRRM has the neck for killing his best characters. What does it feel like to drown your own children? I’ve always wondered. He must’ve loved the Tyrell just as dearly.
Also, according to the costume designer, the way Margaery dresses and does her hair are also part of her trick to gain people's trust. She often wears sleeveless, revealing dresses and pulls her hair away from her shoulders to signify confidence and openness. Unlike Cersei who lets her hair hangs in front of her chest and wears long-sleeved dresses all the time.
Cersei was older than Margaery: the same dress wouldn't look the same on their bodies, even if their bodies were the same size and shape. It's all due to age and its effects on the skin. With a sleeveless dress, Margaery also gives the impression of innocence, even though people knew she wasn't innocent.
So, basically, Margery read the book "how to make friends and influence people" 1. Be polite 2. Build rapport by talking about what the person you talking to like. 3. Be empathetic and demonstrate. 4. Reframe how the person can win if they do what you're saying.
No she didn't. Cersei is a very narcissistic person who tries to control people like Tywin does. She might have learned after many years to be a more endearing personality. But that would be well after she burned her bridge with Robert.
I love Margaery. She's one of the only characters that doesn't make enemies, but allies and (as far as I've seen) hasn't been killed yet. She's beautiful and extremely charismatic.
*3 STEPS TO INFLUENCE ANYONE* *1. Build Rapport* - Physically put yourself on their side - Make physical contact (a lot but not too much) - Get them to talk about the things that they care about *Men* often like to be asked about how things work, *problem solving* *Women* on the other hand often enjoy to share their *emotional experience* - Indicate that you care about their opinion *2. Learn how they view the world* - Be an active listener - The best way to get someone to open up is to show vulnerability - Get to know what makes them tick - Empathise with their feelings *Pacing and Leading* - State their world view - Mirror back how they must have felt or feel - Share that you've experienced a similar situation or feeling that they just found themselves in - Sometimes is just as simple as saying the words ''I understand'' - Truly try to step into their shoes so you can lead them with much less resistance - You can also give them a reputation that they'd like to live up to *(praise the person for what they are doing)* *3. Lead*
@Donnie Darko lol.. like Daenerys lol.. in my opinion she is more like cersei than daenerys.. daenerys was a warrior a conqueror while margery is a goldigger/freeloader.. yeah she would've made a good queen or a politician but she would've never be able to make a mark in history or conquer anything by herself
@@dysplasiaanaplasia4128 she got killed because she underestimated the length Cersei would go to get what she wants. Which as you saw was pretty extreme but meh
When Joffrey is grilling Tyrion at his wedding, Margaery looks genuinely uncomfortable about what Joffrey does, so much so she tries to interfere. Meanwhile the other lannesters including Tywin and Jamie are just watching.
@Ivana Ivanasarah I remember hearing of Princess Diana doing something similar to that with victims of leprosy amongst other acts of kindness, which are too numerous to mention.
Margaery was also a crowning achievement in Game of Thrones as a series; while she is in the books, she is merely represented as a minor character, but it's in the television saga that her character truly comes to life and is fully fleshed out. P.S. This was a very articulate and insightful analysis.
please the only thing that book Loras has over show Loras is one unshown battle, a comparing with Jaime and becoming celebrate (why must the only gay character be the one who never have sex again) Plus book Loras was also extremely self absorbed and arrogant, while in the show he is much nicer and actually tries to cheer people up.
The Tyrells were the best. "Every rose has its thorns" - And Olenna was the thorns of House Tyrell. She got a very, very good sendoff, sadly unlike Margaery. Everything about that scene last night was amazing, she gave Jaime 3rd degree burns throughout.
Yeah Olenna had a really good exit, Margaery's was okay because she knew exactly what was happening and showed her strong intuition, but I wished that when she died she had a scene entirely focused on her death rather than just thrown in with everyone else, especially because of how big her impact was imo
I feel like Olenna, with her last breath, decided the future of house Lannister. She planted enough doubt in Jaime for him to finally turn against Cersei. She died, but not without letting her poisonous thorns strike one last time.
It is that easy, if you are the one perceived to be in a position of higher social standing. If however you are seen as either in a weaker or equal social standing, you're just a resource to be used.
That's why Cersei didn't like her, for she was the only one that could influence her children better than herself. Cersei has a sensitive nerve to anything that can take her power away.
In the books Maggy the Frog had prophecized when Cersei was a child that a younger woman would take everything away from her and she would be killed by her younger brother.
I love this video! So often, the power of feminine energy is overlooked but it's truly one of the biggest tactics a woman can use. Margarey lived in her femininity and her empathy and that's where she found her power. And she was the only character to consistently do that. She was definitely gone too soon, loved her and Olenna. I'm sure every woman can agree with the bit about us wanting to just vent about our problems sometimes without looking for a man to fix it for us, haha!
Margaery is hands-down my favorite Game of Thrones character, and it's so great to see someone break down what exactly makes her such a great player in the game. All your videos are great, but this has to be my favorite so far. Nice work!
@@The482075 I'm an Empath and I could tell you that us (INFPs, the mbti thing) aren't the types who would manipulate people. Maybe we would want to, but then our conscience will bug us forever even if we just think of doing it. So yeah.. P. S. But hey, if there are INFPs who would manipulate people, I'm pretty sure they wouldn't be able to handle themselves and then just do something to stop it. (im not gonna tell what they would do, just.. No) P. P. S. But if there are also Empaths who aren't INFPs, well I'm sorry, okay? I didn't know. So I would most definitely wouldn't understand what they're thinking.
@Bob Oh sorry, I didn't mean it like that.. Sorry. INFP is a personality type, and well, we're also not the only ones who are Empaths. The whole NF's are Empaths. Just.. Search for it, I'm way too lazy to explain everything. :)
@@The482075 Somebody who is truly empathetic would not use your opening up to them against you. Somebody who only pretends to be empathetic on the other hand, may do the things you describe. Most likely, somebody who is able to successfully feign empathy to the point that you believe them truly empathetic when they really want to manipulate you, is likely a psychopath, which means they have no empathy at all and is the latter person you described. So I don't think I agree that somebody very empathetic is as dangerous as somebody who lacks empathy
as someone who works in a call center, the pacing and leading at the end of the video is so beautiful when done properly. our training is to always have control of the call, but when a customer has made it a point to take the control to empathize with us- we do go that extra mile. i promise you that.
I LOVED Margaery, no one ever talks about her! She’s so gorgeous & smart, a total QUEEN & so inspirational (I have to say it, GOALS) I was so upset when she died & of course that didn’t seem to matter to anyone else I talked to smh. She should be a much more popular character from the show than she is.
Margaery was intelligent, she knew how to get close to those who needed it, but as a social climber her family was, she chose one of the most dangerous families to get involved in, remembering that she even deceived the High Sparrow, which, despite being a fool, who was dealing, but she lacked the element of surprise, the strength that Cersei has at one point, instead of playing the game, turned the table and dropped all the pieces that thought they could with her. Margaery with her cunning, which she had in abundance. A talented manipulator who knew how to stick to judicial politics. The strength of this character lay in his ability to win the minds and loyalties. Margaery possessed the tact and courtesy that Cersei lacked. Margaery worked within the social standards of "adequate" femininity in Westeros, but deftly turned them in her favor, to orchestrate political maneuvers behind the scenes. Although Margaery has developed many different facades, depending on who she is trying to manipulate, she has genuinely shown a good heart, compassion and empathy. She also showed genuine concern and tried to form a friendship with Sansa, even offering her help to leave Porto Real after the wedding with Joffrey - although this may have been partly because she had the longer-term goal of good relations with the North , feeling that the unstable Lannisters would not be in power forever. She shared a very strong bond with her grandmother Olenna, sharing her acuteness for manipulation and political maneuvering. Although she had developed many facades to influence the opinions of others in her favor, she was extremely loyal to her family and home, and would make great efforts to keep them safe. Queen of Thorns, what character ... what character ... deserved a video too. She was also known for her wit and sarcasm. As a result, Lady Olenna was popularly known as Queen of Thorns, in reference to Tyrell's secrecy - a rose - and his sharp and barbed comments. She seems to have a very dark sense of humor and likes to mock those around her, including her own family. Despite this, Olenna clearly loves her family, especially her grandchildren.
I agree completely. Although I do think Margaery said "yes" to the engagement to Barantheon/Lannister partly due to her father's doing. I don't disagree that she liked the idea of being "the Queen." Even Olenna remarked how silly her son (M's father) for (paraphrasing here) insisting to play with the "Lions." Olenna (which I agreed with) definitely didn't think it was the best idea to get involved with a dangerous family like the Lannisters but they had to do the best they could.... I think The Tyrells managed to stay on top because of they didn't covet the 'ultimate' throne directly, they just want to secure a top position but not necessarily the number one.
I just remember watching seasons 3-6 of GOT in awe at Margaery. For once I felt like a character was handling things the way I would. No brutish outward displays of strength. No threats. Just lots of schmoozing and flattery to keep everyone (except that bitch Cersei) on your good side.
Would have been nice if Daenerys had met at least once Maergery. She would have learnt a thing or 2 about empathy and how to be good at the game without, you know, torching an entire city.
I don't know, I feel like Daenerys Would have had that coming in one way or another, I mean it wasn't the first time she torched people, and also her father and brother were both crazy so it's in her genes too, etc
@@NA-yq4pe I agree but they didn't do a good job of building up to it. I think they should have had a season of showing dany going more and more crazy. It felt weird for them to have had her torch the entire city just like that. Wish they built it up more and spent more time on it.
@@akshayapradeep9793 I agree, it was definitely rushed and either a couple more episodes or another season were necessary to make her progression less abrupt.
I've actually been doing some of these techniques for years subconsciously and I can attest to how effective they are. It was great to have these skills explained though, helps me be more aware of them and myself. I've definitely noticed you can get much further with customer service agents if you try to make friends or at the very least see them as a human being. Screaming and intimidation gets you nowhere.
I know this is a joke but you could do a video about him. He is a charming character with warmth and kindness. Due to his lack of speech, we the audience have only his body language and actions to go by.
As someone who worked in customer service over the phone for a year, I can tell you that example of you calling in and getting that extra help by just showing common decency and basic consideration makes all the difference in the world. I have bent over backwards to help customers who were understanding and patient with me despite their frustration at whatever they were calling in about, whereas by that same token i have been deliberately obtuse and difficult with customers who talked down at me The secret to getting people to do what you want is to just be nice to them
Not going to lie, I see a lot of myself in the way Margaery acts...never have I thought that the way I act was to influence people. It's surprising how far empathy can get you though. True empathy, not just feigned empathy with a hidden agenda, although I guess the latter can help you get what you want ultimately.
Me too. I always wondered why people easily open up to me and I mirror a lot of the same things she does in order to get to know people, but not having the intention of influencing them.
Your personal story with that agent reminded me of a time I chatted with an agent through a chat room, when I was looking for a certain product but she doubled checked the inventory and they were out of stock. I still thanked and praised her for taking the time to try to help. She then told me she was nervous on telling me because other's were aggressive and would insult them with the news. I then told her that agent's can't solve our problems. We then ended the conversation by wishing each other a Merry Christmas and a happy New Year.
12:00 its true. I work in customer service in a way. When someone is nice instead of screaming at me for things that arent even my fault, I go out my way to help them. But if someone is just spilling their ego at me then I'm not doing more than I absolutely have to according to procedures.
I've always thought Margery was one of the most powerful characters in the series. She could have changed Westeros' fate for the better. The polar opposite of Cersi -- manipulation of people toward the collective good.
... I don't know. Cersei didn't seem very charismatic when she met the witch. She's a malignant narcissist, and the symptoms often begin in childhood. Therefore, her ego and anger must have always been in the way of making her an empathic manipulator like Margaery.
The sad thing about Margaery's death is that she died due to her love for her family. So this still shows, that you really need to abandon every bit of your humanity to completely manipulate someone.
This seems like a great way to just make a friend. Like, it's not pretending if you do wanna know things about them and actually empathize with them, it's just a more confident/controlled (you controlling YOURSELF, not them) conversation, so they still see who you are and you're not lying about anything
My boyfriend and I are the opposites on "gender-based interest gathering". I prefer to explain how things work and I am generally blunt. He is prone to be emotional and wants to be asked about his feelings. I am not contradicting the way it typically works, though I think it's society's fault that it works that way, only giving an example of one of those "this isn't always the case" things he mentioned.
I think it's important to mention that people aren't automatically more logical or emotional due to their gender. Rather it is heavily influenced by a person's upbringing and the society you reside in.
I think it's more about the thinking/feeling spectrum (MBTI) than about gender. Most men are thinkers and most women are feelers, hence those are the stereotypes. But what really matters is the temperament and not the gender itself.
The things you said about Pacing and Leading are quite interesting, it's something I've toyed with before but never really constructed such a good definition of it. There's a particular kind of dead-end argument that can be solved using it - an argument that only exists due to different word usage. And this technique is pretty much the only way to break the deadlock. Forget your own lexicon and use the other person's. Deconstructing their ideas using... their ideas.
Wow, this was a really neat video! I wasn't consciously aware of it, but apparently I've been using these tactics for many years. I never thought of it as "manipulation", but more as simply getting along with people. It's great for work and other professional environments where you need to work closely with different kinds of people, and want your environment to be a positive and productive one. It's also excellent for diffusing tense situations (as long as you don't let your own hot-headedness take the reigns). These tactics have been especially useful as a high school teacher who often has to navigate the treacherous waters of moody, rebellious teendom!
As someone who's worked in Customer Service for a good part of my career, I can tell you that empathizing with the customer service agent will get you a LONG way because customer service reps are so used to people treating them like crap, and empathizing with how difficult their job is will absolutely get you what you need while boosting their self-esteem. It's a win-win scenario, and more customers need to take this approach imho. On the other end though, a good customer service agent will do the same. This is what we train our reps to do and it helps to diffuse so many situations.
Love the bit about relationships. Here's a secret: when men listen to women with deep empathy and relatedness rather than trying to fix her situation for her, THAT is commonly how they fix it. 😁 Doing so clears her emotions or helps her do so because of your listening to and acknowledgment of her emotions. From there, she can handle the situation she is in with ease and confidence. Either that, or she will decide the next day or so what to do about it, as her emotional insight on the situation evolves. Women are usually good at practical tackling once they have emotional clarity as a result of empathy from someone they trust. This is usually the reason she wants to talk about stuff with you. To clear and clarify her emotional state, so that she can feel clear and strong again to internally know what to do and be able to go do it. She may do this a few different times about the same topic, before she reaches that state of clarity and action within herself. If a woman wants actual specific solutions from anyone at all, she normally will directly ASK you for it. Eg. 'What should I do?" or "What would you do?" or "What do you think this means?". Listening to the precise question helps. The more you listen to women as a man without trying to fix it or go ahead and find practical solutions, unless she asks for that of course, and instead always empathizing with her, the more she will trust you, feel comfortable and feel a stronger bond with you and relax around you. Her guard will be able to lower a lot. Relationship gold....
I like to ask people to teach me things and I also prefer to talk about solving problems rather than emotions. My boyfriend on the other hand hates when I ask him to explain how something works and rather that we converse about friendly jokes. So I think it's not always the case that women like to talk about emotions and men like to talk about how things work. (The reverse can be true.) But for sure I agree that if you find what others like to talk about, you've found a great way to get someone excited and open up to you. Making you seemingly approachable
I think it's less about gender and more about personal values. If a girl sees herself a no-nonsense smart person you can offend her trying to patronise her by pushing emotons instead of problem solving. If a guy puts emphasis on his emotions you will make him feel ignored focusing on cold-blooded problem solving. Traditionally, intelligence was important value for men and goodnes and warmth for women, nowadays not so much, so it's much more important to stay in tune with a person you try to connect with.
The thing about how women sometimes just want to share an experience without a solution is super true at least in my circle. I have a very hard time understanding what someone wants when they're talking to me, so with my friends I've found it easiest just to ask. A bunch of my friends have responded well to it, and some have even started informing me before a rant whether they want a solution or just to vent, and it's immensely helpful.
A lot of these methods are things I'm learning at university to become an effective Alcohol and drug councelor, it's amazing to see this kind of information on UA-cam, good work!
I love this! Margaery is actually my favorite character aside from Daenerys. I really enjoy the series where you break down certain features of actors and characters..and was wondering if you could do a video on Hannibal Lecter (from the TV show instead of the movie)? :)
As a person who used to work in customer care, a nice greeting and a tiny bit of small talk - and then expressing your gratitude before the CC has even helped will get u so much better service. I've stayed extra hours for clients who were understanding and cooperative, while if its some nuthead screaming, I'll for sure still do what needs to be done, but hell no, I wont do anything extra for you.
THE NAIL IN THE HEAD! YASSSSS! So bummed he quit posting new stuff cuz he did some GREAT work that brought attn to personal relationships without being direct-speaking.
I feel like a socially manipulative shit, for forming my group of friends thanks to these videos. I make them open up, I make them join, I genuinely care about them, but I still feel manipulative. AGH
I think your generalizations are, well, generally correct in terms of what engages a man or woman in conversations. As you said, there's always exceptions. For me personally, I have noticed over time that I behave more like a man in conversations with other women. They confide in me about their personal problems and I react by offering up possible solutions, but I can sense while it is happening that I'm not giving them what they want and they tend to pull away. I realize later on, that what they really wanted from me is not a plan of action, but more listening, sympathy and reassurance. The dynamic is different with men. It works much better with them in most cases.
As someone with years of tech/customer service experience (to my horror), we're easy to manipulate. Just be cool, we'll go out of our way to be helpful because we'd rather spend some extra time on the phone with someone being nice than take the next call and have to listen to a jerk.
I used to question myself if I was manipulative because when I need tech/customer service I know that being kind and letting them know how much I need & appreciate their help will get me more help but then I thought, But I DO need & appreciate their help & expertise and we might as well have a better conversation.
I always loved her tactics, so much grace and elegance in her moves, words, actions, the way she behaved, always thought she was in fact one of the smartest characters in the game, house tyrell always knew when to push and to pull so subtly you wouldn't even notice
So basically: -Be pretty. -Learn basic personal space. -Be Kind. -Kiss butt like your lips were made for it. -Once there is trust, use suggestions to get someone to do what you want someone to do. Got it.
being kind and empathetic are akin to butt kissing? I'm just like that because it's my moral standpoint, but since people are over here weaponizing it....
Not really. I've met plenty of attractive people of both sexes who'd make you roll your eyes on a good day, and want to slap them across the face on a bad one. If you live with a beautiful person day in and day out, you get used to the beauty. It doesn't seem exceptional or breath-taking anymore. And if they have a bad/confrontational personality which makes you feel uncomfortable whenever you're with them, the beauty will lose its allure damn quickly.
This sort of thing works absolute WONDERS with airport customer service employees. They deal with exhausted, impatient, furious people all day, every day. Toss some empathetic warm small talk their way, maybe pepper in some self deprecating humor and WOOSH. The doors of help swing wide open. This sort of thing works with almost anyone, of course but most dramatically on folks who rarely get warmth from the people they deal with.
1. Put yourself on their side physically. Get closer without invading personal space. Standing to the side is better than being right in front of them. 2. Get people to talk about the things that they care about. Everyone likes to be asked about things that they love. Women tend to share their emotional experience of an event. 3. Indicate that you care. Active listening is quite important. Using head nods, facial expression, and summarizing what they told you. 4. I’ll show you my scar = give up something vulnerable and appropriate and they’ll likely do the same. 5. Be empathetic to other people. Give out heartfelt expression. Empathy means that you could see the world through the other person’s eyes at the moment. 6. Mirroring 7. Saying “I understand”, again put yourself in their shoes and every experience that they’ve ever had.
I am a true Margery at heart and I squashed it. I was scared by how easy it was for me to find what makes people "tick". What they want, what they need to hear and how they want to be treated. This all lead to me knowing exactly what I need to know to manipulate them. And then it wasn't fun. It wasn't necessary and it can have disastrous consequences. Any type of manipulation to me is a form of bullying. Now I am truly convinced that if people do what I want them to do it's because they like me, love me, want to help me. Or simply would like to BE helpful. And FEEL useful. Not because I tricked them. It's not selfish to do what you want. It's selfish to want other people to do what you want. Life is so much better now.
Do you honestly think Margery was bullying Joffrey? If she had been his queen and guided him through situations where he might have blundered as he did when he called for Ned's head, don't you think both he personally and the realm would have been better off than if he had lived to be a tyrannical, cruel despot like Aerys? Manipulation is neutral by definition; try thinking of it like a picture in Photoshop - graphic manipulation. It's got a lot to do with intent and circumstance.
@@kasinokaiser1319 Yes, they are pretty good in the books, but Margaery in the book is not as 'worldly' and 'experienced' as the one on screen. This is one of the instance I believe the show's characterization really outdid the book's.
@@kasinokaiser1319 I think Martin is not really gonna give anything to her, among all the characters he has to work on. She'll probably have the same fate as show Margaery by the end of Winds of Winter.
"meets her end early, at least in the show". She was in 26 episodes, during 5 seasons. Not early at all. The character was greatly expanded from the books
An important think to remember is to not use these methods to get what you want, but use them genuinely in an effort to learn about others. Of course these things increase the chance of good things coming back to you, but your intentions should be honest and genuine. The moment you try to use these methods to manipulate someone for your self interests, you are not a good person. People also see through that kind of thing easily. The moment you stop being genuine even if you are the best actor in the world and continue to appear genuine, people will see what you really want through your actions. So it's even more important to stay as genuine as possible.
Really important question; if masculine identified people are more likely to positively respond to the opportunity to explain a mechanical concept to someone (as you argue), how then, typically, can mechanically inclined men expect to respond to one another? Since they won't get the reward of dominance. I ask as a female bicycle technician/licensed mechanic who is extremely good at her job but face the challenge of gender bias consistently. Because I am in a male-dominated industry should I expect masculine identified customers (who are not bicycle technicians) to challenge me in my work? Or is there a better way to tell them I know how their bike works more than they do, above and beyond repeating "I am a technician. I know because I am telling you. No, a bicycle is not like a rolex and even those need maintenance."
Camille Raneem To answer your question before I ask mine- change your behavior. Appear perfectly calm but in positive mood. Calmly correct any expressed preconceptions. If necessary, calmly remind them youre an experienced professional with good track record whos seen much in her job and theirs is nothing that cant be dealt with. Think of experienced saleswomen in the best shops. If someone goes very rude then, put on the severe mask- think Tywin Lannister lol and very strictly send them off to find someone else. You'd be surprised once you perfect it, how many will start apologizing, kissing your @@@ and even flirting.. Fake and insecure folks! Please help me too. Ive only had men as clients but never as competitors and coworkers like you have. How do you deal with men who always wanna be right, in control, want to know everything off you but not answer your questions and dominate you with ignoring,threatening etc techniques? Before I quit I wanna put them in their place. They already acknowledge im very skilled but they dont seem to mind replacing me with any woman who can remotely do the job.
Excellent video. Once i was watching a serial killer being grilled by the prosecutor in court. And the more the prosecutor accused him, the more the accusations became, the closer he got to the killer and you could see how uncomfortable and flustered he became.
I do that on the phone to and it works, but I also do it because it can make a difference in their day. I cant imagine the stress of dealing with angry customers on the phone all day all the time
Because I was too tired of sitting beside my bully in my class, I ended up using 3:47 to win him over; asking him for help in things that requires strength, while the bully behind me, intelligence. Thus, I had 3 former bullies that defended me against other bullies for the whole year. Plus, I did not have to follow their ways (like sharing their form of humour, aggression, etc).
Similarly, a character like Ser Davos, The Onion Knight, understands how to talk to people to get them on his side. The leaders of the Iron Bank of Braavos, Lyanna Mormont, even Melisandre (when he convinced her to resurrect Jon) all genuinely listened to him.
Always loved Margaery. She had a way of getting what she wanted without threatening or killing anyone. Just manipulation, subtlety and seduction at its finest.
Agreed
She was so good
And her manipulation always make the opposite party feel like they are also in the win. It s a win win
Na I don't like Margaery the way she act and care for others just feel ... so fake and deliberate
@@aintgonnaletuknow5758 true, but she has never done any harm to anybody. She might be fake as hell but she is not evil.
Margery was a really brilliant character. She had so much more to offer. They shouldn't have killed her so early. The Tyrells in general are probably the best family.
That's exactly why they were killed off so quickly.
Same thoughts bro. Olenna was an OG
GRRM has the neck for killing his best characters. What does it feel like to drown your own children? I’ve always wondered. He must’ve loved the Tyrell just as dearly.
Grandma Tyrell was the best character ever!!!!
The Professor ??? Where did you hear this? She found out about her death when she got the script.
Also, according to the costume designer, the way Margaery dresses and does her hair are also part of her trick to gain people's trust. She often wears sleeveless, revealing dresses and pulls her hair away from her shoulders to signify confidence and openness. Unlike Cersei who lets her hair hangs in front of her chest and wears long-sleeved dresses all the time.
Just be hot and that’s it
@@The123carrera Yep, I'd follow her anywhere !
She is a vampire
Cersei understands that though, it's a conscious decision. "She dresses like a harlot for a reason"
Cersei was older than Margaery: the same dress wouldn't look the same on their bodies, even if their bodies were the same size and shape. It's all due to age and its effects on the skin. With a sleeveless dress, Margaery also gives the impression of innocence, even though people knew she wasn't innocent.
So, basically, Margery read the book "how to make friends and influence people"
1. Be polite
2. Build rapport by talking about what the person you talking to like.
3. Be empathetic and demonstrate.
4. Reframe how the person can win if they do what you're saying.
It's a great book!
And be pretty!
888 likes
Doesn't hurt that she's so outrageously gorgeous.
Also the only reason Cersei didn’t fall for Margery’s tricks was because she used to try the same thing on Rob Baratheon.
true. cersei is 20+ years more experienced version of margery.
Nostalgic memories And Cersei doesn't have a conscience.
No she didn't. Cersei is a very narcissistic person who tries to control people like Tywin does. She might have learned after many years to be a more endearing personality. But that would be well after she burned her bridge with Robert.
@@NostalgicMem0ries no she's not. margery wouldn't sacrifice her family for throne
@@ilonakhedongu9150 ha, i doubt it.
I love Margaery. She's one of the only characters that doesn't make enemies, but allies and (as far as I've seen) hasn't been killed yet. She's beautiful and extremely charismatic.
Xenon Rising She's kind of enemies with Cersei.
,,as far as I've seen'', hehe
Consolous Yeah well, Cersi is enemies with everyone. No one but her family likes her ;p
Lmao
Not even her family likes her lmao
*3 STEPS TO INFLUENCE ANYONE*
*1. Build Rapport*
- Physically put yourself on their side
- Make physical contact (a lot but not too much)
- Get them to talk about the things that they care about
*Men* often like to be asked about how things work, *problem solving*
*Women* on the other hand often enjoy to share their *emotional experience*
- Indicate that you care about their opinion
*2. Learn how they view the world*
- Be an active listener
- The best way to get someone to open up is to show vulnerability
- Get to know what makes them tick
- Empathise with their feelings
*Pacing and Leading*
- State their world view
- Mirror back how they must have felt or feel
- Share that you've experienced a similar situation or feeling that they just found themselves in
- Sometimes is just as simple as saying the words ''I understand''
- Truly try to step into their shoes so you can lead them with much less resistance
- You can also give them a reputation that they'd like to live up to *(praise the person for what they are doing)*
*3. Lead*
Gj thanks! 👍
Thanks so much.
Excellent 😊
omg the exact same thing I do 😅
Thanks!
She was a likable and genuine version of Cersei with even more skill at that craft than Cersei herself. That pissed her off a lot.
Cersei was a lot more fun though
So smarter than her that she got killed by cersei ... no, cersei is way smarter the problem is cersei is emotional sometimes.
@Donnie Darko lol.. like Daenerys lol.. in my opinion she is more like cersei than daenerys.. daenerys was a warrior a conqueror while margery is a goldigger/freeloader.. yeah she would've made a good queen or a politician but she would've never be able to make a mark in history or conquer anything by herself
I love Cersei and didn't like margarey
@@dysplasiaanaplasia4128 she got killed because she underestimated the length Cersei would go to get what she wants. Which as you saw was pretty extreme but meh
“i do believe that Margaery is a kind-hearted character”
or is it because she manipulated you into thinking so?
hMmmMm?
Manipulation is not inherently evil, sometimes we need a little bending and pressure to help us improve ourselves.
Manipulation is not always evil.
Sometimes people manipulate to help others be better)
When Joffrey is grilling Tyrion at his wedding, Margaery looks genuinely uncomfortable about what Joffrey does, so much so she tries to interfere. Meanwhile the other lannesters including Tywin and Jamie are just watching.
@Ivana Ivanasarah I remember hearing of Princess Diana doing something similar to that with victims of leprosy amongst other acts of kindness, which are too numerous to mention.
Margaery was also a crowning achievement in Game of Thrones as a series; while she is in the books, she is merely represented as a minor character, but it's in the television saga that her character truly comes to life and is fully fleshed out.
P.S. This was a very articulate and insightful analysis.
please the only thing that book Loras has over show Loras is one unshown battle, a comparing with Jaime and becoming celebrate (why must the only gay character be the one who never have sex again)
Plus book Loras was also extremely self absorbed and arrogant, while in the show he is much nicer and actually tries to cheer people up.
Natalie Dormer tends to add something unexpected to all of her roles.
Golden Rose okay but this comment was praising Margery, not Loras
Margaery and the Tyrells in general are such amazing characters, so sad about what happened last night :(
Omg yes... I was still trying to get over Margaery's death and then...
At least Olenna died with style
The Tyrells were the best. "Every rose has its thorns" - And Olenna was the thorns of House Tyrell. She got a very, very good sendoff, sadly unlike Margaery. Everything about that scene last night was amazing, she gave Jaime 3rd degree burns throughout.
Yeah Olenna had a really good exit, Margaery's was okay because she knew exactly what was happening and showed her strong intuition, but I wished that when she died she had a scene entirely focused on her death rather than just thrown in with everyone else, especially because of how big her impact was imo
I feel like Olenna, with her last breath, decided the future of house Lannister. She planted enough doubt in Jaime for him to finally turn against Cersei. She died, but not without letting her poisonous thorns strike one last time.
Wasn't Olenna supossed to go with Ellaria? And she didn't sold out Littlefinger!!
"If you give them your love, they will return it a thousandfold."
Life Starter Pack If only it were so easy
Life Starter Pack you have a cool channel!
"Me mum always said, if you're kind to strangers, strangers, will be kind to you."
It is that easy, if you are the one perceived to be in a position of higher social standing. If however you are seen as either in a weaker or equal social standing, you're just a resource to be used.
So did Arya really killed them? Because she didn't eat it, instead she ate her bread.
That's why Cersei didn't like her, for she was the only one that could influence her children better than herself. Cersei has a sensitive nerve to anything that can take her power away.
666 likes
In the books Maggy the Frog had prophecized when Cersei was a child that a younger woman would take everything away from her and she would be killed by her younger brother.
I love this video! So often, the power of feminine energy is overlooked but it's truly one of the biggest tactics a woman can use. Margarey lived in her femininity and her empathy and that's where she found her power. And she was the only character to consistently do that. She was definitely gone too soon, loved her and Olenna. I'm sure every woman can agree with the bit about us wanting to just vent about our problems sometimes without looking for a man to fix it for us, haha!
Margaery is hands-down my favorite Game of Thrones character, and it's so great to see someone break down what exactly makes her such a great player in the game. All your videos are great, but this has to be my favorite so far. Nice work!
~ Thanks! Glad you like it :-)
And of course, very pleasing on the eye. ;-)
Her voice is so soothing
She is the true meaning of a trained "Empath"!
@@The482075 I'm an Empath and I could tell you that us (INFPs, the mbti thing) aren't the types who would manipulate people. Maybe we would want to, but then our conscience will bug us forever even if we just think of doing it. So yeah..
P. S. But hey, if there are INFPs who would manipulate people, I'm pretty sure they wouldn't be able to handle themselves and then just do something to stop it. (im not gonna tell what they would do, just.. No)
P. P. S. But if there are also Empaths who aren't INFPs, well I'm sorry, okay? I didn't know. So I would most definitely wouldn't understand what they're thinking.
@Bob Oh sorry, I didn't mean it like that.. Sorry.
INFP is a personality type, and well, we're also not the only ones who are Empaths. The whole NF's are Empaths. Just.. Search for it, I'm way too lazy to explain everything. :)
@@The482075 Somebody who is truly empathetic would not use your opening up to them against you. Somebody who only pretends to be empathetic on the other hand, may do the things you describe. Most likely, somebody who is able to successfully feign empathy to the point that you believe them truly empathetic when they really want to manipulate you, is likely a psychopath, which means they have no empathy at all and is the latter person you described. So I don't think I agree that somebody very empathetic is as dangerous as somebody who lacks empathy
@@monkiram Fair enough.
@@monkiram Yeah I've thought about it. Made that comment a year ago. I no longer stand by it.
as someone who works in a call center, the pacing and leading at the end of the video is so beautiful when done properly. our training is to always have control of the call, but when a customer has made it a point to take the control to empathize with us- we do go that extra mile. i promise you that.
I LOVED Margaery, no one ever talks about her! She’s so gorgeous & smart, a total QUEEN & so inspirational (I have to say it, GOALS) I was so upset when she died & of course that didn’t seem to matter to anyone else I talked to smh. She should be a much more popular character from the show than she is.
Yes!!!! MARGAERY WAS MY FAVORITE!!
3:56 No wonder she is so upset. There is a nail dead centre in her forehead.
Literally laughing at this XD
And she only wants to talk about it...
You can see whole that video by searching "It's not about the nail"
60 Second Success you are everywhere
This TV show is boring. Great analysis, though!
Margaery was intelligent, she knew how to get close to those who needed it, but as a social climber her family was, she chose one of the most dangerous families to get involved in, remembering that she even deceived the High Sparrow, which, despite being a fool, who was dealing, but she lacked the element of surprise, the strength that Cersei has at one point, instead of playing the game, turned the table and dropped all the pieces that thought they could with her.
Margaery with her cunning, which she had in abundance. A talented manipulator who knew how to stick to judicial politics. The strength of this character lay in his ability to win the minds and loyalties. Margaery possessed the tact and courtesy that Cersei lacked. Margaery worked within the social standards of "adequate" femininity in Westeros, but deftly turned them in her favor, to orchestrate political maneuvers behind the scenes.
Although Margaery has developed many different facades, depending on who she is trying to manipulate, she has genuinely shown a good heart, compassion and empathy.
She also showed genuine concern and tried to form a friendship with Sansa, even offering her help to leave Porto Real after the wedding with Joffrey - although this may have been partly because she had the longer-term goal of good relations with the North , feeling that the unstable Lannisters would not be in power forever.
She shared a very strong bond with her grandmother Olenna, sharing her acuteness for manipulation and political maneuvering. Although she had developed many facades to influence the opinions of others in her favor, she was extremely loyal to her family and home, and would make great efforts to keep them safe.
Queen of Thorns, what character ... what character ... deserved a video too.
She was also known for her wit and sarcasm. As a result, Lady Olenna was popularly known as Queen of Thorns, in reference to Tyrell's secrecy - a rose - and his sharp and barbed comments. She seems to have a very dark sense of humor and likes to mock those around her, including her own family. Despite this, Olenna clearly loves her family, especially her grandchildren.
Thank you! Because we see a lot of events concerning her by Cersei's perspective, a lot of people seem to forget she's actually quite a good person!
*King's landing
I agree completely. Although I do think Margaery said "yes" to the engagement to Barantheon/Lannister partly due to her father's doing. I don't disagree that she liked the idea of being "the Queen." Even Olenna remarked how silly her son (M's father) for (paraphrasing here) insisting to play with the "Lions." Olenna (which I agreed with) definitely didn't think it was the best idea to get involved with a dangerous family like the Lannisters but they had to do the best they could.... I think The Tyrells managed to stay on top because of they didn't covet the 'ultimate' throne directly, they just want to secure a top position but not necessarily the number one.
Reminds me of Megan Markle..
@@NWYVR No way. Megan Markle buldozes her way through with a smile. Maybe she's a combination of Cersei and Margaery.
The same actress who played Anne Boleyn in the Tudors.
Yes, Natalie Dormer, she's great!
I love how half of the comments is just mentioning her beauty
No one cares about her beauty. That's it.
@@EmmyV2002 what?
I just remember watching seasons 3-6 of GOT in awe at Margaery. For once I felt like a character was handling things the way I would. No brutish outward displays of strength. No threats. Just lots of schmoozing and flattery to keep everyone (except that bitch Cersei) on your good side.
This!
2:02 This is why people have such intimate conversations in cars.
Would have been nice if Daenerys had met at least once Maergery. She would have learnt a thing or 2 about empathy and how to be good at the game without, you know, torching an entire city.
I don't know, I feel like Daenerys Would have had that coming in one way or another, I mean it wasn't the first time she torched people, and also her father and brother were both crazy so it's in her genes too, etc
@@NA-yq4pe I agree but they didn't do a good job of building up to it. I think they should have had a season of showing dany going more and more crazy. It felt weird for them to have had her torch the entire city just like that. Wish they built it up more and spent more time on it.
@@akshayapradeep9793 I agree, it was definitely rushed and either a couple more episodes or another season were necessary to make her progression less abrupt.
True
@@NA-yq4pe that's what Cercei did too
I've actually been doing some of these techniques for years subconsciously and I can attest to how effective they are. It was great to have these skills explained though, helps me be more aware of them and myself. I've definitely noticed you can get much further with customer service agents if you try to make friends or at the very least see them as a human being. Screaming and intimidation gets you nowhere.
You should do hodor charisma breakdown
Honza novák "Notice how Hodor hodors in this scene. Now this may not work for everyone, but when Hodor hodors, notice how people always listen."
Honza novák I try to hold the door for everyone. So his death is not for nothing.
I know this is a joke but you could do a video about him. He is a charming character with warmth and kindness. Due to his lack of speech, we the audience have only his body language and actions to go by.
hodor? hodor.
hodor hodor hodor
Margaery is definitely one of the best characters on the show.
This channel made me realize how well written and detailed game of thrones is. Until the last two seasons of course
Us : Margery Tyrel is one of the most charismatic personality in GoT
Olena Tyrel : Hold my wine
😂😂😂😂
You mean: Hold my poisoned wine
Margeary knew how to use her beauty and intelligence. That's what I loved most about her.
As someone who worked in customer service over the phone for a year, I can tell you that example of you calling in and getting that extra help by just showing common decency and basic consideration makes all the difference in the world. I have bent over backwards to help customers who were understanding and patient with me despite their frustration at whatever they were calling in about, whereas by that same token i have been deliberately obtuse and difficult with customers who talked down at me
The secret to getting people to do what you want is to just be nice to them
But I wonder who decided all these body languages, the actress or the director
Both. We're talking about the character though, not the people behind Margaery, so it doesn't matter.
I think it's about knowing the character and truly embodying them, the body language then follows as you are in character
Lady Olenna
director.
A good actress would most likely do it herself.
Not going to lie, I see a lot of myself in the way Margaery acts...never have I thought that the way I act was to influence people. It's surprising how far empathy can get you though. True empathy, not just feigned empathy with a hidden agenda, although I guess the latter can help you get what you want ultimately.
Me too. I always wondered why people easily open up to me and I mirror a lot of the same things she does in order to get to know people, but not having the intention of influencing them.
Fiona L true empathy doesnt work on psychopaths and a lot of people in management are pretty f’ed up
Elephant in the room . margaery has the good looks to make those tricks work.
Margaery is a great influencer, not everyone can copy her works. And only Batman is immune to her skills
As a batman, i very much agree with you. Every time I watched her i felt there was something wrong. I felt uncomfortable while shes on screen.
Make a video about VARYS!
Felipe Vergara I agree.. He's the most interesting character for me.. The way he carries himself..
Varys cannot be quantified through conventional means.
I've never visited this channel before, but I just had to click it as soon as I saw my love Margaery
Rule 1: Be attractive
Rule 2: Don't be unattractive
Your personal story with that agent reminded me of a time I chatted with an agent through a chat room, when I was looking for a certain product but she doubled checked the inventory and they were out of stock. I still thanked and praised her for taking the time to try to help. She then told me she was nervous on telling me because other's were aggressive and would insult them with the news. I then told her that agent's can't solve our problems. We then ended the conversation by wishing each other a Merry Christmas and a happy New Year.
Please make one about Hitler's speaches and how he made the people follow him.
Very tough to explain charisma when you have language, culture, and time-period barriers.
Benny Kreiler damn lol
Benny Kreiler awesome man!
youtube will flag him as a racist and delete his channel
interesting suggestion
12:00 its true. I work in customer service in a way. When someone is nice instead of screaming at me for things that arent even my fault, I go out my way to help them. But if someone is just spilling their ego at me then I'm not doing more than I absolutely have to according to procedures.
I've always thought Margery was one of the most powerful characters in the series. She could have changed Westeros' fate for the better. The polar opposite of Cersi -- manipulation of people toward the collective good.
Cercei did that because she saw her younger self in Margeary, and she knew that she was a real treat to her.
True tho
... I don't know. Cersei didn't seem very charismatic when she met the witch. She's a malignant narcissist, and the symptoms often begin in childhood. Therefore, her ego and anger must have always been in the way of making her an empathic manipulator like Margaery.
Was so mad when she died... she legit... was my favorite character.... so mad still.
1 Million!! Huge congrats Charlie :D
Forflies
contact
The sad thing about Margaery's death is that she died due to her love for her family. So this still shows, that you really need to abandon every bit of your humanity to completely manipulate someone.
This seems like a great way to just make a friend. Like, it's not pretending if you do wanna know things about them and actually empathize with them, it's just a more confident/controlled (you controlling YOURSELF, not them) conversation, so they still see who you are and you're not lying about anything
My boyfriend and I are the opposites on "gender-based interest gathering". I prefer to explain how things work and I am generally blunt. He is prone to be emotional and wants to be asked about his feelings. I am not contradicting the way it typically works, though I think it's society's fault that it works that way, only giving an example of one of those "this isn't always the case" things he mentioned.
I think it's important to mention that people aren't automatically more logical or emotional due to their gender. Rather it is heavily influenced by a person's upbringing and the society you reside in.
I think it's more about the thinking/feeling spectrum (MBTI) than about gender. Most men are thinkers and most women are feelers, hence those are the stereotypes. But what really matters is the temperament and not the gender itself.
Left/right brain dominance, hormones
@@zetaforever4953 I work as a clinical psychologist, trust me, it is just simply not true what you say lol
@@t091293 May I ask your opinion on the issue?
The things you said about Pacing and Leading are quite interesting, it's something I've toyed with before but never really constructed such a good definition of it. There's a particular kind of dead-end argument that can be solved using it - an argument that only exists due to different word usage. And this technique is pretty much the only way to break the deadlock. Forget your own lexicon and use the other person's. Deconstructing their ideas using... their ideas.
I never noticed the problem solving versus emotional experience thing. It makes total sense I just needed to hear it in words to notice
videos like this make me admire how well- written the show used to be...and then make me cry when I realise how they ruined it
Wow, this was a really neat video! I wasn't consciously aware of it, but apparently I've been using these tactics for many years. I never thought of it as "manipulation", but more as simply getting along with people. It's great for work and other professional environments where you need to work closely with different kinds of people, and want your environment to be a positive and productive one. It's also excellent for diffusing tense situations (as long as you don't let your own hot-headedness take the reigns). These tactics have been especially useful as a high school teacher who often has to navigate the treacherous waters of moody, rebellious teendom!
Margarey Tyrell was one of my favorite GoT characters. RIP Margarey Tyrell
Loved the use of some of the best characters in some of the best episodes of GoT
As someone who's worked in Customer Service for a good part of my career, I can tell you that empathizing with the customer service agent will get you a LONG way because customer service reps are so used to people treating them like crap, and empathizing with how difficult their job is will absolutely get you what you need while boosting their self-esteem. It's a win-win scenario, and more customers need to take this approach imho. On the other end though, a good customer service agent will do the same. This is what we train our reps to do and it helps to diffuse so many situations.
Love the bit about relationships. Here's a secret: when men listen to women with deep empathy and relatedness rather than trying to fix her situation for her, THAT is commonly how they fix it. 😁 Doing so clears her emotions or helps her do so because of your listening to and acknowledgment of her emotions. From there, she can handle the situation she is in with ease and confidence. Either that, or she will decide the next day or so what to do about it, as her emotional insight on the situation evolves. Women are usually good at practical tackling once they have emotional clarity as a result of empathy from someone they trust. This is usually the reason she wants to talk about stuff with you. To clear and clarify her emotional state, so that she can feel clear and strong again to internally know what to do and be able to go do it. She may do this a few different times about the same topic, before she reaches that state of clarity and action within herself. If a woman wants actual specific solutions from anyone at all, she normally will directly ASK you for it. Eg. 'What should I do?" or "What would you do?" or "What do you think this means?". Listening to the precise question helps. The more you listen to women as a man without trying to fix it or go ahead and find practical solutions, unless she asks for that of course, and instead always empathizing with her, the more she will trust you, feel comfortable and feel a stronger bond with you and relax around you. Her guard will be able to lower a lot. Relationship gold....
I like to ask people to teach me things and I also prefer to talk about solving problems rather than emotions. My boyfriend on the other hand hates when I ask him to explain how something works and rather that we converse about friendly jokes. So I think it's not always the case that women like to talk about emotions and men like to talk about how things work. (The reverse can be true.) But for sure I agree that if you find what others like to talk about, you've found a great way to get someone excited and open up to you. Making you seemingly approachable
I think it's less about gender and more about personal values. If a girl sees herself a no-nonsense smart person you can offend her trying to patronise her by pushing emotons instead of problem solving. If a guy puts emphasis on his emotions you will make him feel ignored focusing on cold-blooded problem solving. Traditionally, intelligence was important value for men and goodnes and warmth for women, nowadays not so much, so it's much more important to stay in tune with a person you try to connect with.
She is drop dead gorgeous.
The thing about how women sometimes just want to share an experience without a solution is super true at least in my circle.
I have a very hard time understanding what someone wants when they're talking to me, so with my friends I've found it easiest just to ask. A bunch of my friends have responded well to it, and some have even started informing me before a rant whether they want a solution or just to vent, and it's immensely helpful.
A lot of these methods are things I'm learning at university to become an effective Alcohol and drug councelor, it's amazing to see this kind of information on UA-cam, good work!
I love this! Margaery is actually my favorite character aside from Daenerys. I really enjoy the series where you break down certain features of actors and characters..and was wondering if you could do a video on Hannibal Lecter (from the TV show instead of the movie)? :)
Can you cover introducing yourself to people your friends know that you don't?
all your friends are in your head. Oh wait! you blew your face off. Whoops forgot.
watch YES THEORY
As a person who used to work in customer care, a nice greeting and a tiny bit of small talk - and then expressing your gratitude before the CC has even helped will get u so much better service. I've stayed extra hours for clients who were understanding and cooperative, while if its some nuthead screaming, I'll for sure still do what needs to be done, but hell no, I wont do anything extra for you.
THE NAIL IN THE HEAD! YASSSSS! So bummed he quit posting new stuff cuz he did some GREAT work that brought attn to personal relationships without being direct-speaking.
Do Varys, please!!!
I feel like a socially manipulative shit, for forming my group of friends thanks to these videos. I make them open up, I make them join, I genuinely care about them, but I still feel manipulative. AGH
Hello fellow Lunar Scorpio ☺☺
I think your generalizations are, well, generally correct in terms of what engages a man or woman in conversations. As you said, there's always exceptions. For me personally, I have noticed over time that I behave more like a man in conversations with other women. They confide in me about their personal problems and I react by offering up possible solutions, but I can sense while it is happening that I'm not giving them what they want and they tend to pull away. I realize later on, that what they really wanted from me is not a plan of action, but more listening, sympathy and reassurance. The dynamic is different with men. It works much better with them in most cases.
As someone with years of tech/customer service experience (to my horror), we're easy to manipulate. Just be cool, we'll go out of our way to be helpful because we'd rather spend some extra time on the phone with someone being nice than take the next call and have to listen to a jerk.
I used to question myself if I was manipulative because when I need tech/customer service I know that being kind and letting them know how much I need & appreciate their help will get me more help but then I thought, But I DO need & appreciate their help & expertise and we might as well have a better conversation.
In yesterday's episode, conversation between Jon and Dany was awesome. Can you do a video on that scene.
C on C is the best channel for this stuff being in highschool I found this make life easier
This show used to be so good!
I always loved her tactics, so much grace and elegance in her moves, words, actions, the way she behaved, always thought she was in fact one of the smartest characters in the game, house tyrell always knew when to push and to pull so subtly you wouldn't even notice
So basically:
-Be pretty.
-Learn basic personal space.
-Be Kind.
-Kiss butt like your lips were made for it.
-Once there is trust, use suggestions to get someone to do what you want someone to do.
Got it.
Little CinnamonRoll I think the hardest part IS to kiss butt lol Most people aren’t willing to put aside their pride to win.
@@amotesolum9577 actually, most people are like that. It's really rare to find someone honest
I failed at point 1
@@amotesolum9577 That's why Littlefinger is so dangerous.
being kind and empathetic are akin to butt kissing? I'm just like that because it's my moral standpoint, but since people are over here weaponizing it....
Step 1. Be ridiculously attractive and alluring.
Step 2. Doesn't matter.
Step 3. Doesn't matter.
Not really. I've met plenty of attractive people of both sexes who'd make you roll your eyes on a good day, and want to slap them across the face on a bad one. If you live with a beautiful person day in and day out, you get used to the beauty. It doesn't seem exceptional or breath-taking anymore. And if they have a bad/confrontational personality which makes you feel uncomfortable whenever you're with them, the beauty will lose its allure damn quickly.
Sansa for instance doesn't have the same convincing skills as Margaery. But you get a starting bonus if you're attractive, yes.
Nice, then the whores in Littlefinger's brothels would have the same manipulative ability that the Tyrell women have.
This sort of thing works absolute WONDERS with airport customer service employees. They deal with exhausted, impatient, furious people all day, every day. Toss some empathetic warm small talk their way, maybe pepper in some self deprecating humor and WOOSH. The doors of help swing wide open. This sort of thing works with almost anyone, of course but most dramatically on folks who rarely get warmth from the people they deal with.
Active listening is huge! Most don’t even know how to do it.
please make a video on Ser Davos Seaworth!
I could watch 100 of these videos, make ones about the mistakes and talents of other characters please
1. Put yourself on their side physically. Get closer without invading personal space. Standing to the side is better than being right in front of them.
2. Get people to talk about the things that they care about. Everyone likes to be asked about things that they love. Women tend to share their emotional experience of an event.
3. Indicate that you care. Active listening is quite important. Using head nods, facial expression, and summarizing what they told you.
4. I’ll show you my scar = give up something vulnerable and appropriate and they’ll likely do the same.
5. Be empathetic to other people. Give out heartfelt expression. Empathy means that you could see the world through the other person’s eyes at the moment.
6. Mirroring
7. Saying “I understand”, again put yourself in their shoes and every experience that they’ve ever had.
I am a true Margery at heart and I squashed it. I was scared by how easy it was for me to find what makes people "tick". What they want, what they need to hear and how they want to be treated. This all lead to me knowing exactly what I need to know to manipulate them. And then it wasn't fun. It wasn't necessary and it can have disastrous consequences. Any type of manipulation to me is a form of bullying. Now I am truly convinced that if people do what I want them to do it's because they like me, love me, want to help me. Or simply would like to BE helpful. And FEEL useful. Not because I tricked them. It's not selfish to do what you want. It's selfish to want other people to do what you want. Life is so much better now.
Do you honestly think Margery was bullying Joffrey? If she had been his queen and guided him through situations where he might have blundered as he did when he called for Ned's head, don't you think both he personally and the realm would have been better off than if he had lived to be a tyrannical, cruel despot like Aerys? Manipulation is neutral by definition; try thinking of it like a picture in Photoshop - graphic manipulation. It's got a lot to do with intent and circumstance.
What if book Margaery won the Game of Thrones?
Kasino Kaiser she’s not used nearly as much in the books. One of the few characters better in the show
Hasan Abbas Do the Tyrells do anything in the books? All these scheming, and political maneuvers?
@@kasinokaiser1319 Yes, they are pretty good in the books, but Margaery in the book is not as 'worldly' and 'experienced' as the one on screen. This is one of the instance I believe the show's characterization really outdid the book's.
Tracy S She still has room to grow
@@kasinokaiser1319 I think Martin is not really gonna give anything to her, among all the characters he has to work on. She'll probably have the same fate as show Margaery by the end of Winds of Winter.
"meets her end early, at least in the show". She was in 26 episodes, during 5 seasons. Not early at all. The character was greatly expanded from the books
Make one about Robb Stark
An important think to remember is to not use these methods to get what you want, but use them genuinely in an effort to learn about others. Of course these things increase the chance of good things coming back to you, but your intentions should be honest and genuine. The moment you try to use these methods to manipulate someone for your self interests, you are not a good person. People also see through that kind of thing easily. The moment you stop being genuine even if you are the best actor in the world and continue to appear genuine, people will see what you really want through your actions. So it's even more important to stay as genuine as possible.
She is amazingly beautiful, smart & very calm! Good at handling most situations! Damn I love her
Really important question; if masculine identified people are more likely to positively respond to the opportunity to explain a mechanical concept to someone (as you argue), how then, typically, can mechanically inclined men expect to respond to one another? Since they won't get the reward of dominance. I ask as a female bicycle technician/licensed mechanic who is extremely good at her job but face the challenge of gender bias consistently. Because I am in a male-dominated industry should I expect masculine identified customers (who are not bicycle technicians) to challenge me in my work? Or is there a better way to tell them I know how their bike works more than they do, above and beyond repeating "I am a technician. I know because I am telling you. No, a bicycle is not like a rolex and even those need maintenance."
Camille Raneem To answer your question before I ask mine- change your behavior. Appear perfectly calm but in positive mood. Calmly correct any expressed preconceptions. If necessary, calmly remind them youre an experienced professional with good track record whos seen much in her job and theirs is nothing that cant be dealt with. Think of experienced saleswomen in the best shops. If someone goes very rude then, put on the severe mask- think Tywin Lannister lol and very strictly send them off to find someone else. You'd be surprised once you perfect it, how many will start apologizing, kissing your @@@ and even flirting.. Fake and insecure folks!
Please help me too. Ive only had men as clients but never as competitors and coworkers like you have. How do you deal with men who always wanna be right, in control, want to know everything off you but not answer your questions and dominate you with ignoring,threatening etc techniques?
Before I quit I wanna put them in their place. They already acknowledge im very skilled but they dont seem to mind replacing me with any woman who can remotely do the job.
Love these Game of Thrones videos they make these concepts so easy to understand!! Can you do one on Davos?
Excellent video. Once i was watching a serial killer being grilled by the prosecutor in court. And the more the prosecutor accused him, the more the accusations became, the closer he got to the killer and you could see how uncomfortable and flustered he became.
This is one the most important topic (influence, persuasion) u have done for this day of age, pretty important skill when u see populism everywhere...
the tyrells are my favourite
Hey can you PLEASE do Davos and his ability to quickly save a situation with conversation
I do that on the phone to and it works, but I also do it because it can make a difference in their day.
I cant imagine the stress of dealing with angry customers on the phone all day all the time
Because I was too tired of sitting beside my bully in my class, I ended up using 3:47 to win him over; asking him for help in things that requires strength, while the bully behind me, intelligence. Thus, I had 3 former bullies that defended me against other bullies for the whole year. Plus, I did not have to follow their ways (like sharing their form of humour, aggression, etc).
I just got a new job, i gunna manipulate all my coworkers according to this 😂👍
How did it go??😂
People tend to like me a lot and trust me a lot because I do all these things already. I didn't realise until now though
So you dress like a harlot for a reason?
@@darrenpat182 who tf said anything about me dressing up
I LOVED her character.
Similarly, a character like Ser Davos, The Onion Knight, understands how to talk to people to get them on his side. The leaders of the Iron Bank of Braavos, Lyanna Mormont, even Melisandre (when he convinced her to resurrect Jon) all genuinely listened to him.