Moving countries while autistic (with
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- Опубліковано 20 сер 2024
- In this episode I talk to Bianca Toeps, author of "But you don't look autistic at all" and the recently published "This autistic girl went to Japan". We talk about what it's like moving and living abroad as an autistic person, the cultural differences between the Netherlands, Japan and the UK and our own experiences of being the odd one out... twice.
Find Bianca's book here: www.toeps.nl/b...
Her Instagram: / biancatoeps
Apart from obvious thing that comes from watching an interview which is getting to know somebody's views, I really appreciate these because it feels so good to see natural autistic flow. And it is norm here and expected. When I hear Sam or people interviewed, I recognise so much of my own way of speaking. Usually tiny things like a millisecond delay in reply because I'm pulling together thoughts and finding best words available to me at the moment that would convey the message (that's why it happens to me). It's nice feeling to see these as valid and a proper way of communicating. Thank you Sam.
I really like the consistant motif across the covers of all three books! It is subtle but recognizable. *chef's kiss*
I feel everything Bianca says about Japans medical system!!!! It is so confusing and I‘m glad I haven’t been really sick since I moved to Japan. Fearing the day when it will actually happen 🥲
14:40 grown up in the very north pf Germany the german family including my mother spoke "plattdütsch", which is a language, not a dialect, and I find it very similar to dutch. It also has english influence, as well as german of cause.
I for real only have two books in my house, one is yours, and the other is from Bianca.
Zo leuk om deze aflevering te luisteren, dank Samantha en Bianca!
This video popped up at just the right time! I’m audhd and moving abroad in 2 weeks!
I get asked what country I'm from in my home town reasonably frequently.
I can relate the things you said about learning the language so much! live in the Netherlands for 10 years now and I can read and write much better than I can speak or understand what people are saying. I've had many courses, I had a taalcoach for a year, I have a language diploma for B2 level. If I am prepared for the topic, I can speak fairly well and people assume that I can speak very well, but then they answer and at their second sentence I am lost, I don't understand anything and I can't remember very basic Dutch words. If I would be able to hang out at the bars, meeting new people at parties, parks etc, I would be very fluent now with all those courses I took. Now when Dutch people hear that I live here for 10 years theyalways say "you should learn the language" and I just scream inside "Oh really? You think so?"
I thought this was a great interview! You both are so interesting. Thank you for sharing this.
I'm having great trouble with the language too, and I can totally relate to what was said. First fo all, I learn in a specific way and learning languages I have always been worst at in school. (I did some self-studying with text books and online apps and had one-on-one classes for about 2 years, but I'm still kind of at beginners' level.) Then, I'm afraid of speaking for fear of making mistakes and sounding stupid. Third, and this completely mirrors what Bianca said, when I say something in Japanese I have carefully planned out my sentence and may give the impression of being fluent. But then the other person starts to flood me with a Japanese reply of which I only understand maybe 10% of the words and hence the meaning is lost on me. Then not only do I struggle to reply with what little Japanese I have at my disposal, I also get flustered and nervous and my mind starts to go blank, losing that little bit of ability as well.... I had seen another interview with Bianca before and what I do not quite understand is how she is allowed to live, stay and work in Japan. Don't you either need to be a spouse of a Japanese national or have a working Visa, i.e. have a sponsoring Japanese employer?
Business manager visa! In short: I have my own company and invested money in it.
I am always so interested in your topics and would love to watch all your videos but your sound is so low compared to other channels I watch and to the other people you talk to on your videos that I'm constantly adjusting to not be alternately blasted and straining to hear. I've held off mentioning it until now but I hope I'm not the only one who feels this way. Sorry to give any negative feedback but wanted to let you know. Hope for the best for you...
it's really helpful to get feedback like this, although I have been doing my best to level out the audio and bring both participants up to volume. Theoretically, the editing should have worked and the end result sounds fine to me (I wouldn't upload it if it didn't) and many people, but I know that a few people still have this issue and I'm trying to work out exactly why it's fine for some and not others.
I have the same problem, it’s really hard to listen to this one, I have to crank the audio up extremely far. If any other normal sound comes in during this hour, it will damage my ears.
@@alessazoe It's very confusing because even listening on my phone, it seems about the same level as other videos on the platform, with my phone volume at a medium level. So how can there be a certain error for some people and not others, even checking on multiple devices? I'll keep trying to troubleshoot and reupload if necessary.
@@YoSamdySam Yep, that’s really weird! My only assumption would be that certain devices like phones (or certain headphones maybe even?) level out audio automatically, while others like desktop pcs (I’m on one) don’t to that?
@@YoSamdySam I watched it on my phone and had no issue at all. I did have trouble hearing Bianca but that was mostly because of the quality of the sound. I personally love to watch with subtitles but the automatic ones from UA-cam often mess it up. I don't know if it's an option that UA-cam offers or not, but maybe you can add your own subtitles (or automatically generated and perfected by you) that people can choose to turn on or off. I know it would be more work for you but it would definitely help a lot of people.
I hope you'll still do a follow up video to your Psilocybin Retreat! I'm so looking forward to it.
although moving, the visa process, and taxes were difficult to navigate in Czech republic, health care is pretty straightforward for basic stuff. I had no idea I was autistic at that time
leaving you´re bag ... It´s gone when you are back or the bombsquad is called for a suspicious bag...
In Japan still being there would be such a weird thing to me. But i love that it´s possible over there.
I am Icelandic. I am told that Icelanders come across as cold stoics who are nice when they get to know you. The Japanese seem even colder to me.
Oh gosh, yes, I still find I'm afraid to speak! I've been trying to learn Japanese for over a decade, and it's still super hard >.<
I assume Bianca isn't based in Tokyo? I know there's a chain called 'The Hub' in Japan, and it's a bar designed for foreigners to socialise.
I've learning Japanese for 6 years and the hardest part of every lesson is the small talk at the beginning! Learning rules A okay, saying what I did at the weekend or what the weather is doing and I got blank.
I am, but I'd rather die than go to The Hub, lol ;)
@@Bianca_Toeps Oh, well, kinda stuck there then. I'm sure there's other places out there, but oddly enough, nobody seems to talk about anywhere other than the hub 😑
In Korea you go to the hospital for a lot of things as well. And you can leave your bag and laptop unattended no problem. I also feel trouble speaking and listening (well listening I might get half the context but I can't speak back). I feel this way with most of the languages I've tried learning. Maybe partly with reading/writing I can take my time to form a response and figure out the exact meaning but I can't do that in real-time. Unfortunately Korea is pretty behind social progress like LGBTQ and accepting mental health, single women/divorcees, etc. So there are reasons why I wouldn't want to live there personally.
The sound is really muffled from both contributors.
Which podcast platforms is your podcast on? I can't seem to find it on the ones I use.
@@aftereight5266 Which is great for some purposes, and not for others. Clearly this is a podcast that is broadcast on other platforms in addition to youtube, hence my question.
In Europe it’s easier because they just think your American.
Great conversation! Thank you both.
Also, I find it so rude to call everyone in a country rude. You also are talking to a dutch lady.
Not very respectful.
What I don't like about living in the Netherlands is that everyone is always in a hurry. They're like 'oh, we have to wait for the train, no, we don't have time for that, I'll risk my life and the life of the child I have with me, to be a minute earlier at my destination'. Everything has to happen fast and they don't care what danger it brings. People here are selfish, they care about getting to their destination on time, but they don't care if they do that by making you late, or even putting you in danger. People here just don't give a shit about anyone's life but their own. I usually get along a lot better with foreigners 🙈
Compared to Germans, Dutch people are so chill though. For example, when our train broke down and we had to switch to buses, everyone was super relaxed about it.
I had a lot of interesting conversations on trains and buses with strangers in the Netherlands. My problem was rather that Dutch people would prioritize socializing and get upset when I said I had to study.
@@tas7471 that's interesting, I have a very different experience about the socialising. The only people who have ever tried socialising with me on public transport, were foreigners. The Dutch are too busy with their phones to even notice others.