MSSP - Matt's Proprietary Dong Wax

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  • Опубліковано 21 січ 2025

КОМЕНТАРІ • 384

  • @peanutarbuckle2980
    @peanutarbuckle2980 2 роки тому +1512

    matt is a real life "its always sunny" character

    • @fallout3freak360
      @fallout3freak360 2 роки тому +77

      Matt as regular at Paddy’s is a great idea

    • @GlassofAIDS
      @GlassofAIDS 2 роки тому +121

      I like Shane, but as I've been getting into MSSP it's incredible how much Matt's brain is what drives the pod.

    • @marcusrussell3716
      @marcusrussell3716 2 роки тому +27

      This is the greatest description of Matt.

    • @hungry6012
      @hungry6012 2 роки тому +34

      Dong wax sounds like a sunny plot device

    • @rudiguliani4243
      @rudiguliani4243 2 роки тому +38

      @@hungry6012 Fight milk, kitten mittens, and dong wax belong together

  • @scorpionz982
    @scorpionz982 2 роки тому +1277

    I like how the blend never got more complex than just straight coconut oil

    • @TiltvikLHS
      @TiltvikLHS 2 роки тому

      Be careful dawg, the shamans west coast legal team might come after you for spreading the proprietary blend without consent.

    • @gordona7081
      @gordona7081 2 роки тому +447

      It’s proprietary

    • @cornelionsqween8028
      @cornelionsqween8028 2 роки тому +34

      what about the chocolate magic shell dip?

    • @charliec2966
      @charliec2966 Рік тому +4

      Where do I buy?

    • @VaanshLakhwara
      @VaanshLakhwara Рік тому

      He’s got a real slick dick thought

  • @jimmyrustler8983
    @jimmyrustler8983 Рік тому +529

    "The oily bird gets the ringworm" - Sun Tzu

  • @mikumonsoon
    @mikumonsoon 2 роки тому +535

    “i’m doing exercises to get my foreskin back” LMAO

    • @WalkingPaceWP
      @WalkingPaceWP 2 роки тому +74

      stolen valor on us foreskinned dawgs

    • @CapcomGod
      @CapcomGod 2 роки тому

      unironically works tho can confirm from experience kek just not in the r*tard way explained here

    • @junior1388666
      @junior1388666 2 роки тому +25

      He's culturally appropriating south americans

    • @TimmyMcGowan
      @TimmyMcGowan Рік тому +25

      “my yeast infection *might* have something to do with my foreskin reconstruction exercises” just on another planet lmao

  • @MattH-wg7ou
    @MattH-wg7ou 2 роки тому +435

    "Dude! Youre a fucking space cadet!" Is the most accurate description of Matt that I could imagine lmao

    • @padtully95
      @padtully95 2 роки тому +12

      @A Z when you call someone a space cadet that basically means they're off In space, or eccentric or just a weird dude

    • @zerocool5395
      @zerocool5395 2 роки тому +2

      @A Z What does "Out to lunch" mean?

    • @zerocool5395
      @zerocool5395 2 роки тому

      @A Z Super crazy gay dudes are fun.

    • @jacobs1047
      @jacobs1047 2 роки тому +11

      @A Z I hear this in Canada, it means that your body is there but your brain is out to lunch

  • @sl1ck557
    @sl1ck557 Рік тому +126

    That deep sigh from Shane whenever Matt has an insane idea gets me every time.

  • @Pneubeteube
    @Pneubeteube 2 роки тому +316

    The more I watch this podcast the more I realize that Matt is a modern day alchemist, in philosophy and practice

    • @marshallblansett9254
      @marshallblansett9254 Рік тому +19

      With the state that America is in it's a good sign that people like Matt are getting into these practices.

    • @B.C.101
      @B.C.101 Рік тому +7

      ​@@marshallblansett9254 And dong wax is only the beginning.

    • @TheSpagheti
      @TheSpagheti 7 місяців тому

      Philosophy, practice, and proprietary.

  • @Deeplycloseted435
    @Deeplycloseted435 2 роки тому +458

    There is something about Matt, that makes him seem like a smart 14 year old. Like he’s smart and dumb at the same time.

    • @T_D_B_
      @T_D_B_ 2 роки тому +55

      Curiosity plus naivety

    • @wsoares89
      @wsoares89 Рік тому

      Fr. He is simultaneously one of the greatest philosophers to ever live while also being one of the stupidest humans to ever exist

    • @FreddieJ65
      @FreddieJ65 Рік тому

      Legit!

    • @margaritaandthemasters
      @margaritaandthemasters Рік тому +28

      ​@@T_D_B_ plus a huge dose of teenage confidence

    • @ithinkimarealboy2402
      @ithinkimarealboy2402 Рік тому +13

      Don't besmirch Matt. He is wise beyond his years. The Shaman guides us Dawgs.

  • @John_Notmylastname
    @John_Notmylastname 2 роки тому +166

    That exasperated exhale from Shane right after Matt said men can get yeast infections. LMAO

  • @jwoahlnt
    @jwoahlnt 2 роки тому +284

    Lmao matt is the funniest human being on earth I swear.
    Shout out manhood
    shout out jelking
    Shout out dong wax

    • @peanutarbuckle2980
      @peanutarbuckle2980 2 роки тому +7

      Used to be. Before he had kids and got married. This is five years old.

    • @nickinskeep
      @nickinskeep 2 роки тому +10

      @@peanutarbuckle2980 that'll happen

    • @rudiguliani4243
      @rudiguliani4243 2 роки тому +8

      Lurk more newphag. The shaman is an expert in Jelqing not jelking

    • @jwoahlnt
      @jwoahlnt 2 роки тому

      @@rudiguliani4243 lurk more? Smd pussboi

    • @melodydantalionmellowastar1990
      @melodydantalionmellowastar1990 2 роки тому +2

      @@peanutarbuckle2980 I'm glad to hear he's living the dream

  • @Supreme_Sals
    @Supreme_Sals 8 місяців тому +22

    0:13 That initial huff exhale from Shane is so hilarious

  • @sapermader2198
    @sapermader2198 Рік тому +143

    Shanes reaction to hearing matt was back to applying homemade dick wax to his bird was like someone hearing a friend who is an ex alcoholic took back to the bottle 😂

    • @milesshirley6251
      @milesshirley6251 Рік тому +4

      Shane breathes heavy in the beginning like “my friend is about to say some insane shit”

  • @zacharychristy8928
    @zacharychristy8928 2 роки тому +97

    Shane's sigh after Matt first said "Dong wax" said everything you need to know 🤣

  • @stickynicky8908
    @stickynicky8908 2 роки тому +196

    Maybe my favorite arc throughout the whole cast is Matt’s messed up dong

  • @JrLv38944
    @JrLv38944 2 роки тому +132

    0:00 Genesis of Mccusker’s Dong wax
    5:35 Matt’s clinic visit
    16:48 Shamans long road to recovery
    18:45 More Dong shenanigans / Doctor Mccuskers
    25:25 Dong Wax side effects

  • @chocktaebolanca757
    @chocktaebolanca757 6 місяців тому +15

    “Dong wax, think about it.”
    This is the funniest man on Earth

  • @rangeEater
    @rangeEater 2 роки тому +73

    I’ve started syringing this stuff directly in my sensitive bellend and it’s working wonders. Not only is my yeast infection gone but my urethra is also permanently closed

  • @KinoTechUSA69
    @KinoTechUSA69 2 роки тому +102

    Doc McCusky's dong wax has saved my life several times over.

    • @T_D_B_
      @T_D_B_ 2 роки тому +6

      It's also delicious on toast

  • @lw3894
    @lw3894 Рік тому +22

    Shane reminds me so much of my late best friend. He would always be so shocked at my weird ideas and conspiracies and would always try to be the voice of reason but i was not having it lol Thanks for bringing back my fav memories boys

  • @tbug50
    @tbug50 Рік тому +32

    “Tell us the ingredients”
    “It’s a proprietary blend dude”

    • @retrodadstl
      @retrodadstl 5 місяців тому +1

      😂😂😂 its proprietary😂😂

  • @johnnyhammersticks88
    @johnnyhammersticks88 Рік тому +13

    “Rx-stop touchin your bird” 😂😂

  • @quainejohnson4808
    @quainejohnson4808 Рік тому +20

    It's so funny how they talk to each other in mortal kombat terms
    "the black dude stood behind me and Shao Khan'd the whole thing"

  • @Dingleberrycrunch36
    @Dingleberrycrunch36 2 роки тому +49

    For proprietary blends you still have to disclose all the ingredients, you just dont have to display the amount

    • @T_D_B_
      @T_D_B_ 2 роки тому +4

      Thanks for that info no one asked for bud

    • @Dingleberrycrunch36
      @Dingleberrycrunch36 2 роки тому +33

      @@T_D_B_ any time p.a.l.

    • @Dingleberrycrunch36
      @Dingleberrycrunch36 2 роки тому

      @@T_D_B_ stands for Personal Ass Licker, in case you’re wondering

    • @strongbongus
      @strongbongus Рік тому +4

      so you don’t have to put “100% coconut oil”, it’s just “coconut oil”

  • @finster6266
    @finster6266 2 роки тому +52

    Matt’s the funniest man on earth I swear… fuckin dong wax lmfao

  • @Stealth_boy
    @Stealth_boy Рік тому +22

    My brother calls my schizophrenic sister a space cadet and I’m finally getting it

  • @nickkerr5714
    @nickkerr5714 2 роки тому +15

    1:22 and Shane cracked the secret ingredient lmao

  • @NoPe-n1j
    @NoPe-n1j 6 місяців тому +2

    “You think they were taking a knee on me?” 😂😂😂

  • @Disc0-Delta
    @Disc0-Delta Рік тому +20

    Shanes so prophetic about what will happen about the dong wax

  • @sethrobinson28
    @sethrobinson28 2 роки тому +28

    Literally a concoction

  • @cullenshaver106
    @cullenshaver106 2 роки тому +35

    I like how they keep referring to it as a rash despite it clearly being ringworm

  • @hugosabato7662
    @hugosabato7662 11 місяців тому +1

    This is one of the best pod clips you guys out out, holy moly I lol’d almost the entire time

  • @gunkanjima3408
    @gunkanjima3408 10 місяців тому +5

    Who knew that Matt makes Shane look normal

  • @Dom-mw8gk
    @Dom-mw8gk 2 роки тому +13

    "dries your bird to kingdom come"

  • @geoff9905
    @geoff9905 2 роки тому +28

    As soon as Shane asked, how did they conduct the std screening, every girl he's ever bagged screamed in unison.

  • @Kyrosfam
    @Kyrosfam 18 днів тому +1

    Nothing kills me like matts unorthodox rants, Jesus

  • @tookie36
    @tookie36 Рік тому +5

    2:06 Shane predicts the future

  • @smokyprogg
    @smokyprogg 4 місяці тому +2

    Matt is the wikipedia "[citation needed]" tag manifest into a human, and I'm all for it

  • @dalemcdade3010
    @dalemcdade3010 Рік тому +3

    I love the subtle “join or die” in the back

  • @rodrigocarrillo3663
    @rodrigocarrillo3663 2 роки тому +17

    One of the greater sagas in history

    • @T_D_B_
      @T_D_B_ 2 роки тому +1

      An epic tale for the ages

  • @ChasingFin
    @ChasingFin Рік тому +3

    Got a HEP C ad at the end of the video 😂 thanks Matt for battling!

  • @Truffle_Pup
    @Truffle_Pup Рік тому

    8:33 Jesus Christ Shane... That really is how you get yourself shot in public 🤣🤣🤣

  • @1X2Y3Zk
    @1X2Y3Zk 2 роки тому +38

    It is actually super common for people to catch ringworm from dogs…..

    • @toshi7429
      @toshi7429 2 роки тому

      he does wrestle naked with his dogs too. i remember matt saying his wife told him that his as5 was dirty once or something while he was doing it

    • @trip4923
      @trip4923 2 роки тому

      If you go doggystyle on enough pups, you're bound to catch a rash or two.

    • @T_D_B_
      @T_D_B_ 2 роки тому +3

      Yiiiiiikes

    • @Ballsandcheese19
      @Ballsandcheese19 10 місяців тому +1

      What about dog girls? Asking for a friend

    • @SqueaksUofA
      @SqueaksUofA 9 місяців тому

      That’s how I got one on my knee when I was little. Playing with beagle puppies in a dog pen.

  • @everyvillainislemons7583
    @everyvillainislemons7583 Рік тому +5

    “Reconstruct my bird”

    • @NoFlu
      @NoFlu 10 місяців тому

      Porn parody of the post-bellum south...

  • @nvrted4809
    @nvrted4809 4 місяці тому +4

    i am absolutely crying in the gym rn i cannot bench😭😭😭

  • @charliec2966
    @charliec2966 Рік тому +5

    McCuskie's Diamond Dong Wax.
    "Shine Bright Like A Diamond"

  • @Vers16
    @Vers16 Рік тому +6

    When he said it helps bring the fat cells to his dick to increase the girth made me piss my pants

  • @RocketCityGardener
    @RocketCityGardener 2 роки тому +11

    Coconut oil, old spice, and tendy grease

  • @joshuafriesen4436
    @joshuafriesen4436 10 днів тому +1

    Man I wish I had a bro like how these guys are bros

  • @Initial__B
    @Initial__B 2 роки тому +6

    saziraph hit me like a 432 flute

  • @traviscoates6878
    @traviscoates6878 2 роки тому +24

    It's Proprietary...

  • @aanntthhoonnyy
    @aanntthhoonnyy 11 місяців тому +3

    Shoutout to all the dawgs waxing bird

  • @SqueaksUofA
    @SqueaksUofA 9 місяців тому

    Incredible. Matt talking about his ashy bird and I immediately thought of a Phoenix reference and without skipping a beat - in comes Shane with the same reference.
    I’m home fellas!

  • @AgentZ3R0.
    @AgentZ3R0. Рік тому +11

    Can someone please get Theo con and Matt together for a podcast. I’d love to listen to them co-sign each others shit for 2 hours haha

    • @Chibears1523
      @Chibears1523 Місяць тому

      Did you watch the one recently?

    • @AgentZ3R0.
      @AgentZ3R0. 6 днів тому

      @ I did! Loved it! What did you think of their on Mic Banter/Chemistry?

  • @Nomadestra
    @Nomadestra Рік тому +4

    Dong Wars: Return Of The Foreskin

  • @tomik6537
    @tomik6537 2 роки тому +10

    but is it propriatary?

  • @jrector04
    @jrector04 2 роки тому +1

    Hell yea, I’ve been waiting for someone to splice the before and after episodes

  • @tyca659
    @tyca659 2 роки тому +1

    "pet friendly" got me 😂😅

  • @davidwouldntyouliketoknow2166
    @davidwouldntyouliketoknow2166 2 роки тому +13

    when you take into consideration Matts romantic proclivity - of course it is coconut oil

    • @cesartapia610
      @cesartapia610 2 роки тому

      @@T_D_B_ It works? Wait, it does what exactly?

    • @T_D_B_
      @T_D_B_ Рік тому +1

      ​@Cesar Tapia it's just natural lube... general use multi purpose type of this... brown folks ❤ the stuff 😂

  • @kylebardin4786
    @kylebardin4786 10 місяців тому

    “Dead man walkin” 😂😂

  • @GP-ch9ys
    @GP-ch9ys 2 роки тому +40

    Shout to all the uncirc’d dawgs that don’t give into the female aesthetic.👊🏼

    • @mr.bidnessman2469
      @mr.bidnessman2469 2 роки тому

      Never give up your foreskin like all those other mutilated freaks. The Good Lord Jesus Christ didn’t make a mistake when he made our dicks.

    • @tomik6537
      @tomik6537 2 роки тому

      shout out to having feeling in your dic during sex 👍

    • @tomik6537
      @tomik6537 2 роки тому +12

      shout out to not partaking in a tradition based around sanitation practices thkusand years ago

    • @Bran_Flakesx7
      @Bran_Flakesx7 2 роки тому +11

      @@tomik6537 shout out to the long-term health benefits of chewing on your own smeg 🦾🎓

    • @tomik6537
      @tomik6537 2 роки тому

      @@Bran_Flakesx7 Hey idiot, take a bath and WASH. youre not 5 anymore

  • @bnizzle8500
    @bnizzle8500 2 роки тому +5

    Matt is doctor dong M.D.! Doctor Doogie trouser snake M.D.!

  • @DerangedTrapper
    @DerangedTrapper 2 роки тому +1

    Your channel is the best, keep it up homie

  • @screechweiner2921
    @screechweiner2921 2 роки тому +10

    snake oil shaman

    • @seanmatthewking
      @seanmatthewking 2 роки тому +4

      his dong wax is literally oil for his snake

  • @aspiringnormie9499
    @aspiringnormie9499 2 роки тому +8

    It's a proprietary blend.

  • @philgiordano7715
    @philgiordano7715 8 місяців тому

    This is the most Matt thing ever, it’s almost like someone imitating him

  • @bobbosnap1693
    @bobbosnap1693 10 місяців тому +1

    I laughed so hard I had to stop at 3min to catch my breath... why do we still not have dong wax!

  • @John-mf1sz
    @John-mf1sz 11 місяців тому +1

    The fact that he got ringworm from this shit is so insanely hilarious.

    • @Cobbido
      @Cobbido 3 місяці тому

      you don't get ringworm from coconut oil

  • @johnnyhammersticks88
    @johnnyhammersticks88 Рік тому +1

    Calling your d**k your bird is just so funny. Where tf did that even originate? Why bird? Lmao

    • @T_D_B_
      @T_D_B_ Рік тому +1

      I don't know the origin but it's def widely used Philly area slang

    • @johnnyhammersticks88
      @johnnyhammersticks88 Рік тому +1

      @@T_D_B_ well they are the eagles?

    • @WaffleHouseBandit
      @WaffleHouseBandit Рік тому +1

      I feel like there may be a connection between the term "bird" and "the old twig and berries"

    • @peepas2633
      @peepas2633 10 місяців тому

      It kinda looks like a bird

    • @SqueaksUofA
      @SqueaksUofA 9 місяців тому

      I think the term bird for your dick originated with The Rat Pack. They had their own slang language and bird was one of them.
      Could be wrong though.

  • @fallout3freak360
    @fallout3freak360 2 роки тому +2

    I could totally see Matt working on some stuff with Will Blunderfield

  • @mattf8479
    @mattf8479 Рік тому +1

    I had the same experience at that urgent care on city ave

  • @toatsmagoats72
    @toatsmagoats72 Рік тому +1

    that nurse had ring worm on her worm ring

  • @jmsmith1767
    @jmsmith1767 Рік тому

    “Dong Wax & T-Shirts dude”

  • @geo8367
    @geo8367 Рік тому +2

    Side effects of Dong Wax©may lead to ringworm

  • @maximeb190
    @maximeb190 9 місяців тому

    Matt is the goat for this. Anyone else restoring?

  • @anthonyrose2232
    @anthonyrose2232 2 роки тому +26

    Matt is 100% correct on circumcision. It was the 90s so I don’t hold my parents too morally responsible but good grief, imagine your child is born into a crazy new world, and one of the first things you do is mutilate his unit 🤢

  • @AU-pu9vl
    @AU-pu9vl 2 роки тому +1

    i dont know if this was urgent care hahahahaahahahahah

  • @JamieBrennan
    @JamieBrennan 2 місяці тому

    proprietary blend hahaha he is fucking brilliant.

  • @some-replies
    @some-replies Рік тому +1

    Shane shitting on it the whole time is great

  • @NDRonin1401
    @NDRonin1401 2 роки тому +5

    Forget coconut oil.
    100% pure almond oil is where it's at.
    Been using it through 8 years of dating and marriage and it's Shrek 1 !
    Perfect for bird and puss.

    • @jimmyrustler8983
      @jimmyrustler8983 Рік тому +1

      Jojoba oil is good for those with nut allergies, too. 👍

    • @NDRonin1401
      @NDRonin1401 Рік тому +1

      @@jimmyrustler8983 if your woman has a nut allergy, you have a bigger problem than lube 🤣

    • @MichaelBrown-wx6zq
      @MichaelBrown-wx6zq Рік тому

      On the beef tallow train myself. Highly reccomend

  • @whitebroccoli694
    @whitebroccoli694 2 роки тому +4

    These two should have a tv show. Matt is like the funny nutty guy and Shane the straight guy.

    • @T_D_B_
      @T_D_B_ 2 роки тому

      If you mean broadcast TV, unfortunately, that is a dying medium. As a result, they are in a death spiral of lesser quality output. So I would say a network or cable show would never be a good a the podcast. Subscribe to the boys Patreon. Watch the entire cast in long form. If you like these clips, you'll love the full cast. That is the show you seek.

  • @Buelr
    @Buelr 2 роки тому +10

    I’m in dyer need of dong wax

  • @halfpint90
    @halfpint90 Рік тому +8

    The fact that he got ring worm a few weeks after this is great

  • @bradyhale6191
    @bradyhale6191 2 роки тому +4

    “DoNg wAx???”

    • @John_Notmylastname
      @John_Notmylastname 2 роки тому +2

      Did you hear Shane’s exhale right after Matt said men can get yeast infections?

    • @bradyhale6191
      @bradyhale6191 2 роки тому

      @@John_Notmylastname i swear Matt makes Shane confused if he’s the weird one sometimes😂

  • @kevina8858
    @kevina8858 Рік тому +1

    Goes away and comes back??? MATTYS got the herpiederpies 😂😂😂

  • @boi4369
    @boi4369 9 місяців тому +1

    I would pay so much money for a McCusker’s Dong Wax shirt

  • @viktorsincic8039
    @viktorsincic8039 2 роки тому +4

    "war torn dong" noice.

  • @codyb1909
    @codyb1909 6 місяців тому +1

    MSSP needs to be in gta 6

  • @Nickl920
    @Nickl920 2 роки тому +2

    in the morning, and at night if you want.

  • @loopeygoopey
    @loopeygoopey 2 місяці тому

    there’s something different about Shane‘s voice in these early episodes can’t quite put my finger on it

  • @T_double_U
    @T_double_U Рік тому +1

    Lmao proprietary blend

  • @adamhoward7221
    @adamhoward7221 2 роки тому +3

    I wish they sold a dong wax shirt

  • @whyshouldibeats
    @whyshouldibeats Рік тому

    I remember when I first heard the ep with dong wax. Incredible saga

  • @mdvv-2521
    @mdvv-2521 9 місяців тому

    Is every episode including the old episodes available on Patreon. I really want to hear the first episodes they’re not available on spotify

  • @Ashley_Cano
    @Ashley_Cano Рік тому +4

    What is Matt doing with that wiener that he got a yeast infection? That’s rare for men.
    Bruh a piss test doesn’t test for herpes or aids 😭 you gotta get your blood drawn for both of those or wait till you have an active outbreak to get a swab test. Plus hiv/aids doesn’t show up for 6 months after coming into contact with it.
    Wtf is Matt doing out here 🤣 Geezus Christ dude

  • @CinoThoughtExperiment
    @CinoThoughtExperiment 2 роки тому +4

    Matt’s right I got a coco oil hj and it was probably as close to head as it can get 10/10 would recommend

  • @neekbot
    @neekbot Рік тому +2

    Lmaoo imagine if instead of massage parlors it was janky doctors offices and the doctors wack you off

    • @boosted_spirit
      @boosted_spirit Рік тому

      They used to for women back in the day.
      Wife complaining too much or sad?
      Hysterical.
      Doctor would fingerblast her to cure it.
      If that didn't work you could have her lobotomized.
      Simpler times

  • @ramondimas1252
    @ramondimas1252 Рік тому +2

    I had a rash once and my pecker looked like a burn victim. I called it spawn dick. As in spawn the McFarlane character. 😂

  • @genzcurmudgeon8037
    @genzcurmudgeon8037 7 місяців тому

    Coconut oil dries out your skin bros. Just FYI. Oil draws out the water from your skin. Use coconut oil very very sparingly. Use like 1/4 of the amount of lotion you would use.
    Teeny amount of C oil for your Teenis

  • @nathaniellavender9388
    @nathaniellavender9388 3 місяці тому

    I totally forgot about Bleed for This

  • @shewbtoob
    @shewbtoob Рік тому +2

    Matt calling his dick his bird is so funny and I can’t explain why