@@emilierekdal5118 tbh I thought it was tommy wisaeu or however you spell it lol I was like daaamn he got better at English it seems lol. Boy was I wrong lol
Concerning Pinoccio, you wrote, "As a writer this really gives me confidence in my writing skills." Yes! Go forth in great confidence, my child. You cannoteth doeth worseth.
@@cdjk28 wdym it has a relantionship between a woman and a BEE fighting to stop producing honey (which increases bee population irl and benefits them) while the bees being mostly males (they wouldn't survive that long lol) and working in a company in their hive that encourages them to overwork to death how is it not an acid trip?
I like how a magical growing nose isn't logical in their world, and yet a puppet coming to life follow by a horse who could talk and two bipedal furries is
well this can simply all be explained. - living puppets aren't wrong because they are probably sex robots. - talking animals are slaves. - and furries are the lower class (as they should be 😌)
The funniest thing in this for me is the weird “SkadeeSkadeeSkadee!!” while he’s booking it to the window. Like wtf even is that sound and what is it even trying to convey
there should just be an entire montage of Polly Shore making random sounds in this movie. There's a lot. Especially that horrendous sound he make on his horse.
i dont think lionsgate showed pauly shore the scene or give any directions when he was voicing that line. or just any of his lines rlly. a lotta them sound outta place
The scene has a purpose because you can see Pinocchio in the back. But at first it was funny cause i thought it just randomly showed them lol they're like basically the same model only one has a tiny skinny mustache.
Yo, they seriously tried to do the whole "being human is about what's on the inside" morale, but then pulled the rug from under our feet and said "Screw it, let's just copy Tangled's revival thing, that'll connect somehow!"
The faces and audio don’t sync, and the acting of pretty much everyone is troll 2 teir. Everyone’s distracted by gay Pinocchio but but no ones talking about how this movie brakes like the most basic rules of animation, film making, and sound mixing.
But if everything else is considered imaginative then maybe this is the most imaginative movie of the century because they took old, classic Pinnochio and made him ✨fruity✨ along with adding things to it that could ruin someone's life 🙂
Okay so three versions of Pinocchio were due to come out this year INCLUDING a live action Disney reboot [and those have done Soooo well in the past ~Rolls my eyes~] so Lionsgate films searched for and found a cheap version shot in Russia, bought it for pennies, then knocked out the fastest, cheapest and WORST voice acting imaginable in a desperate rush to beat the other films to the market. Never seen that done before [cough that sounds remarkably like "Dungeons and Dragons"]. Lame knock-offs are commonplace. Asylum films has turned it into a full-on parody industry, but this is just going way too far.
He says “he may become a selfish actor (DiCaprio), or an artist (Da Vinci), or a turtle who only like pizza”. Not entirely sure what this film has against Leonardo DiCaprio. Or why this line was included anyway. Or any of the lines.
This seems like one of those movies you would find in the bargain bin at Walmart or a dollar store but it's actually produced by a significant film studio and I continously can't belive that
A part of me was hoping the trailer made the movie look way worse than it actually was, but this review just confirmed it wasnt the case. I still havent seen the full film yet but I already have my expectations set.
INMORTALIZED! YOU'RE THE CREATOR, YOU TRAITOR, HEY! THERE'S NO VACCINE TO CURE OUR DIRTY NEEDS, FOR NOW, YOU MUST BUILD OUR MACHINE YOU DIE TONIGHT! (Sorry, the "i'm alive" part reminded me to the song)
I just tried watching it and all the voice actors are different. I've been trying to figure this out for like an hour. Pauley Shore isn't voicing pinochhio. For some reason it's some British VA and all the other voices are different when I compare the clips to the trailer. Can someone please help me with this? I might have been watching the Russian dubbed version. Is there even a Russian dubbed version?! WHY AM I NOT HEARING TWINKNOCCHIO?! I SWEAR I'M LOOSING MY FUCKING MIND SOMEONE HELP ME PLS 😭
There are two dubs, a UK version (Which is the one you watched) and a US version. The US version is from Lionsgate and that's the one with the yassified Pinocchio lol
I guess talking animals a normal. The cat, the fox, the horse. But a wooden puppet? That's weird. And a perfect excuse for the gun crazed cat to shoot something.
This is supposed to be a „true story" and even the horse said, that the Pinocchio's nose doesn't really grow when he lies. Like, the name „Pinocchio" literally means „one who lies often" (and if we consider that Pinocchio's main character trait is his nose growing when he lies, I don't understand the purpose of this movie.. oh ye, money ig) SKE DE SKE DE
Pinocchio is just a cute-ish sounding embellishment of the name Pino (actual italian name), which Geppetto chose as Pinocchio was carved from a single piece of pine wood. Supposedly after the book got popular the name became slang for liar in tuscany and neighboring regions but I've lived in collodi for years and haven't heard it used a single time
Aside from Geppetto and (surprisingly) Pinocchio none of the voices fit their characters, especially the detective guy. At least he had the whole Worldussy
“Buddy! You are alive!😭” “Ugh. Yeah. I guess so.😒” As yes, the most touching character revival scene in history.
"UGuH, I guess I'm alive."😑😔😔😒😒😒
Ngl I choked during that part
Yaaas
A mood
Yep, he's definitely a teenager 😆
This sounds like they got a group of drunk people to make a parody of this classic movie
Haha I was just about to comment on how Pinocchio sounds drunk throughout the whole movie lmao. xD
SO TRUE LOL
@@emilierekdal5118 tbh I thought it was tommy wisaeu or however you spell it lol
I was like daaamn he got better at English it seems lol. Boy was I wrong lol
Don't you mean Classic book?
Agreed
As a writer this really gives me confidence in my writing skills 🤡
As a fellow writer, I agree
Oh my as a student who is interested in writing stories, will really really make it easier lol
Concerning Pinoccio, you wrote, "As a writer this really gives me confidence in my writing skills." Yes! Go forth in great confidence, my child. You cannoteth doeth worseth.
Gepeto is just a supportive protective parent. He knows his son is fruity and he wants to protect him from homophobes.
Yes me I’m homophobic
Lmfao
The homophobic cat still found him 😔
@@manwhoismissingtwotoenails4777 I have your two toe nails
I- 💀
This movie is basically the worlds most expensive shit post and I love it
Bee movie
@Camygael true lol
@@camygael nah bee movie is much better than this lol
@@camygael At least the Bee Movie wasn't a complete acid trip, it had a story
@@cdjk28 wdym it has a relantionship between a woman and a BEE fighting to stop producing honey (which increases bee population irl and benefits them) while the bees being mostly males (they wouldn't survive that long lol) and working in a company in their hive that encourages them to overwork to death how is it not an acid trip?
I like how a magical growing nose isn't logical in their world, and yet a puppet coming to life follow by a horse who could talk and two bipedal furries is
WOWW YOU DON'T READ MY PROFILE PICTURE 😶😶❌❌
Obviously
@@kindlyhelpmereachto100ksub9 gæ
well this can simply all be explained.
- living puppets aren't wrong because they are probably sex robots.
- talking animals are slaves.
- and furries are the lower class (as they should be 😌)
This doesn’t happen every day for you? It must be a sad illogical world your live in.
The funniest thing in this for me is the weird “SkadeeSkadeeSkadee!!” while he’s booking it to the window. Like wtf even
is that sound and what is it even trying to convey
there should just be an entire montage of Polly Shore making random sounds in this movie. There's a lot. Especially that horrendous sound he make on his horse.
3:01 "IMMA BOY AND IMMA ALIIIIVE!"🤣🤣🤣
XDDD
IM A BOY AND IM ALIIIIIIIIVEEE!!
AAHH 😩💅
i LOST IT when the cat immediately fucking shot pinnochio like what the hell even was that scene😭
FR I SHAT TEARS 😭😭
he was killed for being wooden lmao
“Mama ma wooden boy”
Fr tho I died 💀💀💀
@@ImNextInLine *2nd amendment demonstration*
9:09 - 9:19 I love how Pinocchio sounds mildly annoyed at being brought back alive, as if it's some small inconvenience LMAO!
He wanted an out of this movie, but destiny said: Nope, you're going to suffer with us.
i dont think lionsgate showed pauly shore the scene or give any directions when he was voicing that line.
or just any of his lines rlly. a lotta them sound outta place
"you're alive!"
"oh yeah, I guess"
"Ugh, yeah... I guess so"
Kuzco
Bella: "I don't even like you!"
Pinocchio: "No, Bella, please! Help me! My daddy will kill me if he finds out I don't like you either. 😭"
Lol
Lol
Am I the only one who bursted laughing with the 3:39 scene?
"Anyone suspicious in your home?"
Zoom the weirdst extras ever in any animation movie
I thought I was the only one who loved the constable lmaoo
The scene has a purpose because you can see Pinocchio in the back. But at first it was funny cause i thought it just randomly showed them lol they're like basically the same model only one has a tiny skinny mustache.
I know someone who looks like that.
They look like dream 💀
IM LOOSING MY FUCKING MIND IM LITERALLY UNCONTROLLABLY LAUGHING WHY DID THEY MAKE HIM CALL GEPPETO DADDY 😭😭
They did it for the fanfics
they made him an entire fruit buffet
Daddy is just meaning dad the guy is basically a child nothing bad behind it u guys are strange.
@@whydidtheballooneatthefox282 daddy doesnt mean father anymore it means master, sir, dom , owner
@@cyberjunkie2880 well people are sick
Yo, they seriously tried to do the whole "being human is about what's on the inside" morale, but then pulled the rug from under our feet and said "Screw it, let's just copy Tangled's revival thing, that'll connect somehow!"
WOWW YOU DON'T READ MY PROFILE PICTURE
Ok, I won't, I'm sure no one else will either
my favorite part is the deep voice of “see you later my dear gepetto” to “bye daddeeeee!!!!’”
5:32
“MAMA MIA! A WOODEN BOY! AHHHGH!”
*pulling that trigger without hesitation*
This movie is a comedy gold. It feels like a parody just to piss the audience or something😂😂😂😂
I took away this comment’s 123 likes
@@paulolsen2197 I took your fridge
I just want to listen to Pinocchios voice. Cracks me up. And the skedeee skedee thing
WOWW YOU DON'T READ MY PROFILE PICTURE
I'd only be pissed if I brought the DVD.
The faces and audio don’t sync, and the acting of pretty much everyone is troll 2 teir. Everyone’s distracted by gay Pinocchio but but no ones talking about how this movie brakes like the most basic rules of animation, film making, and sound mixing.
well the movie was originally made in Russia, so the faces are most likely synced to the original Russian audio
And the voice acting for Pinocchio is the worse voice acting I’ve ever seen
c'mon this is way worse than trolls 2. Not a fan of the trolls franchise but this movie is pathetic
@@pillbugm8914 Not Trolls 2,Troll 2.
@@pillbugm8914 you need to watch Troll 2. As soon as possible.
2:48 feels like a fever dream. Well the whole movie does but especially this- like why did he laugh and then ‘oH bOy iM AlIvE”
Tf
True
The acting was so bad
As an Italian, I'm dying laughing. Poor Collodi is surely writhing in his grave. Lmao.
At least you're finding some enjoyment in this disaster of a movie!
Collodi, who was already rolling in his grave after a Soviet guy took his work, changed the plot and claimed as his own:
I remember hearing one review that summed the movie up too well I couldn't say it better myself:
"Horrible & Phenomenally Unimaginative"
it's funny how Taco Bell made a better anime then a full fledge movie
There's a Taco Bell aNIME????!!!!
@@amirose4434 yeah look it up on UA-cam. It's used to promote their nacho fries
But if everything else is considered imaginative then maybe this is the most imaginative movie of the century because they took old, classic Pinnochio and made him ✨fruity✨ along with adding things to it that could ruin someone's life 🙂
@@kindlyhelpmereachto100ksub9 oh shut up
Shrek pinocchio is the real pinocchio, thongs and all.
Fax
XD
Tbf this Pinocchio sounds like he wears thongs too
Lol
I think it's just this Pinocchio's future self no
8:52 can't believe there's literally hello neighbor in this movie
Hello neighbor 3 confirmed???
Hello Neighbor 3: A Fairly Odd Tale
wait WHAT-
My personal favorite lines:
“SKIDEWSKIDEWSKIDEWSKIDEW-“
“BYE DADEEE!”
And
“It’s just meEe”
The it's just me could become a new meme
"Pinnochio u r alive!" " *sighs* I guess so" he sounds so disappointed 🤣😂
"Ugh, I guess so..." 🙄😒
Aahaahhaahhahaahha
WHYYY DID HE HAVE TO CALL HIM DADDY 😭
he was already fruity, might as well go full throttle
skidew skidew skidew
THANK YOU DAD-EI 😩
“Bye daddi, bye bye!”
Idk bro, is calling your dad daddy not normal? Even I thought it wasn't weird cuz I call my dad daddy...
Okay so three versions of Pinocchio were due to come out this year INCLUDING a live action Disney reboot [and those have done Soooo well in the past ~Rolls my eyes~]
so Lionsgate films searched for and found a cheap version shot in Russia, bought it for pennies, then knocked out the fastest, cheapest and WORST voice acting imaginable in a desperate rush to beat the other films to the market.
Never seen that done before [cough that sounds remarkably like "Dungeons and Dragons"].
Lame knock-offs are commonplace. Asylum films has turned it into a full-on parody industry, but this is just going way too far.
“Maybe Leonardo…No, that won’t do. He’d grow up to be a selfish actor.”
They really came for Leo by adding that line 💀
I love how when Pinocchio came back to life and became a real boy he sounded annoyed like they just woke him up from a nap
2:37
Funny since in the trailer he says he would grow up to be a turtle that eats pizza
Probably a good thing they changed it. The original line felt soooo forced
@@sigma--boss7098 So does the final line.
He actually says both, including an artist
He says “he may become a selfish actor (DiCaprio), or an artist (Da Vinci), or a turtle who only like pizza”.
Not entirely sure what this film has against Leonardo DiCaprio. Or why this line was included anyway. Or any of the lines.
Genuinely the most believable voice acting from Pinocchio this whole movie was when he said “ugh, yeah I guess so.” Like…are you kidding?
Geppetto: *takes head and hits it with hammer 3 times *
Also Geppetto: "damn that was the most exhausting thing I've ever done"
Bruh this line got me laughing so hard: “I was having a very nice nap and Pinocchio rudely awakened me with this god-awful noise.”
This looks like a very impressive college student project but not enough for a studio sponsored feature...
WOWW YOU DON'T READ MY PROFILE PICTURE
I've seen better college student projects as well, so-
@@somanygoodfandoms well, there's still range in impressive, some go to become assistance animators and others lead animators
@@davadh Fair enough
"Lions gate didn't pay me to crap on this movie." That's exactly what someone who's been paid to crap all over this movie would say 🧐
This seems like one of those movies you would find in the bargain bin at Walmart or a dollar store but it's actually produced by a significant film studio and I continously can't belive that
“Lions gate didn’t pay me to crap on this movie” did anyone else see his nose grow when he said that?
HAHAHA
WOWW YOU DON'T READ MY PROFILE PICTURE
@@kindlyhelpmereachto100ksub9 WOW why don’t u stop putting this on every comment
5:19 this looks like a highschool play, where no one wanted to participate, and they barely remember their lines
..I'm-.. bella-
MY 😐 NAME 😐 IS 😐 PINOCCHIO 😐
MAMA MIA 😨 A WOODEN BOY 😱 ARRGGHHHHH 💥💥💥💥💥💥
*mOaN* PEENOKIOOOOOO 😭 WOT HAVE YOU Dh-🥵ONE? U KEELED H-hIEM! 😩😩😩😩😩😩😩
@@tripleltrouble568 WHAT ARE YOU SHOOTING 🔫 AT FURBRAAAAAIINZZZ!?!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!? 🏋️♀️🏋️♀️🏋️♀️🏋️♀️🏋️♀️🏋️♀️🏋️♀️🏋️♀️
7:20
A wooden boy gets rejected by a girl, funniest sh*t I’ve ever seen ..
8:25 best piece of advice ever
2:31 I think it’s funny how the ninja turtle joke was dropped because it made absolutely zero sense
It’s still in there, though he says he’ll be an actor, than he says he’ll be an artist, than a turtle who only cares about pizza.
2:55 from what I’ve seen, this is the smoothest animation out of this movie
FOR SURE
HOLY SHEET
their whole budget went for that scene XD
lmao you’re actually right
I’m I boy and I’m alive! Leaves
this movie feels ironic, like all the animations looks mediocre but when he got shot, that shit was amazing
We did not ask
05:39 the ending screen would be "perfect" here
The way Pinocchio said I IM ALIVE sounded like he was drunk
7:04
“It’S jUsT mE”
-Pinocchio 2022
A part of me was hoping the trailer made the movie look way worse than it actually was, but this review just confirmed it wasnt the case. I still havent seen the full film yet but I already have my expectations set.
bro who tf say "skiddy skiddy skiddy!" while running 🤣 1:03
Fairy: "If someone wants to be human, all they have to do is be human."
I don't think that's how the system works...
It's 2022, you can be anything you want to be!
Just identify yourself as human
Your dog suddenly poofing into a human would be terrifying.
@@nunyabiznes33 because 14 year olds said so
This is 2020 gen ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE EVEN MARRYING A COOKIE
I won't get that out of my head
"Thank you daddy"
"SKA DI SKA DI SKA DI!"
Edit: oh my god mom I'm FAMOUS!
I choked on my pita chips at that part 😭😭😭😭💀😂
My favorite part 🤣
No way the voice actor wasn't drunk
"RRAAACHA"
@@Amulet. I have to believe he was held at gunpoint by the cat, forced to voice act as the gayest straight character in cinema history lmao
if this was a movie from like 2009 i wouldnt say a thing but this just hurts to look at, not mentioning the sound design
Pinocchio: Is straight.
Everyone: *"absolutely not."*
4:32 "Thank you daddy." I feel like they knew what they were doing.
“I’m a boy and I’m ALIVEEEEEEEEE ah-”
-Pinocchio 2022 also Pinocchio “SKEDISKEDISKEDISKEDI”
INMORTALIZED! YOU'RE THE CREATOR, YOU TRAITOR, HEY! THERE'S NO VACCINE TO CURE OUR DIRTY NEEDS, FOR NOW, YOU MUST BUILD OUR MACHINE YOU DIE TONIGHT! (Sorry, the "i'm alive" part reminded me to the song)
I FREAKING CANT🤣🤣
5:16
And it spawns one of the most insane scenes in cinimea history..
-Wells Fargo add plays-
5:51 so true 😹
I just tried watching it and all the voice actors are different. I've been trying to figure this out for like an hour. Pauley Shore isn't voicing pinochhio. For some reason it's some British VA and all the other voices are different when I compare the clips to the trailer. Can someone please help me with this? I might have been watching the Russian dubbed version. Is there even a Russian dubbed version?! WHY AM I NOT HEARING TWINKNOCCHIO?! I SWEAR I'M LOOSING MY FUCKING MIND SOMEONE HELP ME PLS 😭
There are two dubs, a UK version (Which is the one you watched) and a US version. The US version is from Lionsgate and that's the one with the yassified Pinocchio lol
@@espasold6275 OMG THANK YOU. That makes so much more sense now
Well this movie IS from Russia so the Russian dub as well as the weitd lip sync should make sense
@@benitomercia7643 There's also another US dub with Jon Heder as Pinocchio.
Where can i watch the version with pauley shore 😭
This movie looks like is was made in a different language and then dubbed over. This is horrible hahah
It was. The movie was made in Russian originally
@@2PRO_4U_2NO that explains so much to me
@@2PRO_4U_2NO we don't want to be associated with this
@@nostalgicrobot No, definitely not!
As a fellow Russian, I'm torn between apologizing for this movie's existence and saying "you're welcome" for all the memes it created.
The cat just straight up shot Pinocchio without warning, what a gangsta
8:17 close your eyes and listen 😏
Omg
I can’t get enough of this channel. Well done!
Thank you!
4:40 I make this sound when I’m taking a piss
*SKE DEE SKE DEE SKE DEE RRRRRHHHAAKA*
DEE SKÆDEE SKÆDEE SKÆDE- LAKKA
"I'm a boy and I'm aliiiive!"
STOP IT 😭
E
🔫
0:20 I THOUGHT HE SAID I TOOK A BIG SHAT😂
😂😂😂😂
FAATHER WHEN CAN I LEAVE TO BE OWN MY OWWNNNN, I'VE GOT THE WHOOLLE WOOORRRRLLLDD TO SEEEE!!!!!
*worldussy
*worldussy
*worldussy
*worldussy
no
Please dress up as Pinocchio for Halloween 😂😂
Add powder + 💅 + feminine sound = _SASSY_
MATERIAL GWORL
daddy~~
"trick or trEat💅"
*receives candy*
"yass queen, sLay"
"trick or treat! 💅"
*Gives Candy 🍭*
"Thank you _daddy~!_ 👁️👄👁️"
I guess talking animals a normal. The cat, the fox, the horse.
But a wooden puppet? That's weird. And a perfect excuse for the gun crazed cat to shoot something.
The “animation” during the first exchange with Bella gave me so many Zelda vibes
I hate that the dude at 7:36 walks like he's holding in a giant Taco Bell turd.
💀💀💀
STAPHHHH 💀💀💀💀
"hmm.... how about we change his voice?"
"we can't"
"oh c'mon, they wont notice"
*"hey tom, just act gay as possible"*
also that "bye daddy" 💀
This is a Russian movie, so the detective randomly looking for suspicious people with no evidence makes sense.
Good ol' militsiya days...
9:36 TAKE A SEAT SHORTEEE
*CRASH*
I still struggle to believe this is a real lionsgate film
2:55 this looks like something from the sims 4
It does too- 💀🤣
It does!
lol
9:03 but why is it like Tangled
9:21 At least it has better lip sync lol
It’s cuz the original movie was in another language
6:07 Just look at the Fox's hand
Oh shit went right threw
yikes
Clipped throw his head
This is supposed to be a „true story" and even the horse said, that the Pinocchio's nose doesn't really grow when he lies. Like, the name „Pinocchio" literally means „one who lies often" (and if we consider that Pinocchio's main character trait is his nose growing when he lies, I don't understand the purpose of this movie.. oh ye, money ig)
SKE DE SKE DE
It is the other way around: Pinocchio started to mean "liar" only after Collodi's book became popular.
Pinocchio is just a cute-ish sounding embellishment of the name Pino (actual italian name), which Geppetto chose as Pinocchio was carved from a single piece of pine wood.
Supposedly after the book got popular the name became slang for liar in tuscany and neighboring regions but I've lived in collodi for years and haven't heard it used a single time
"U dont think its suspicious that theres no one suspicious in ur home?" -some detective
3:01 “ima boy and imaliiiiiiive” kiLLED ME
I think the most shocking thing in this movie isn't that they have completely changed the whole story and made it worse it's that he isn't gay
SKIDEE SKIDEE SKIDEE SKIDEE 🐎🪟🏃🏼♂️
9:13 LMAO WHA
"See you later my dear GEPETTOOO"
I can't- lol im dying😂
“If you wanna be human (or anything else) then just be human”
Ollie London: and I took that personally
Pinocchio leaves his home, 5 mins after, gets shot, this is trully a very accurate Latino experience.
Aside from Geppetto and (surprisingly) Pinocchio none of the voices fit their characters, especially the detective guy. At least he had the whole Worldussy
“Hey you should like this person!”
“Ok!”
This makes so much sense 😌
The horse is voiced by Napoleon Dynamite.
When Pauly Shore is the most normal thing in the movie, you know you've got an...interesting movie.
"I'm a boy and I'm aliveeee"
"AUGHHH😩"
5:00 he sounds like hes drunk
Just listening to the lines is making me scream: "Who wrote this script?! I want names!"
Why the hell does Pinocchio just fucking shout at everyone
4:16
Yo, what is this...
In my entire LIFE I never THIS-
The body movement doesn't match the voice, the voice doesn't match the character 😭
Guy : he's a living puppet!!!!
Also the guy : *a talking cat*
I really feel like they made this movie bad on purpose👁️👄👁️
Still better than dingo pictures
a man named jePEDO carving a little boy to call him daddie.......this one of them scifi adaptations aint it
whoa this is history.
Fun fact: Pinocchio is 100 years old because most trees are 100 years old and Pinocchio is made out of trees, (wood) so he is old
Yeah but the wooden parts are also dead tree material. This implies that Pinocchios are 100 yr old wooden zombies.
The most cinematic and emotional scene I’ve ever seen:
“Buddy, you’re alive!”
“Uh… I guess so.”