No one is clapping for the man who is trying to talk some sense into those men about treating a woman with respect. This speaks volume about the culture in this society.
agreed man, I admire him and wish him all the best. In my opinion he is a real man, must not have been easy to turn in his own brother but when he has murdered a child, how could you ever think of doing anything else?? I respect you Peter, and I hope he can see the amount of respect he has garnered from people living all over the world.
This man has justified himself in the eyes of God and has escaped a generational curse.He should rejoice in his heart knowing he’s free from that curse which will follow that family
sure even when it is your own son, just hand him over. You will protect him and he will kill you one day!! A person who sheds blood over no defense to self belongs to JAIL!
I was 26 years, at the prime of my life with a fresh degree and working as a management graduate trainee. I got married and three months in, my husband hit me. I lost my hearing (but it was temporary, and I resumed near full hearing after five years). When it happened, all my relatives told me to talk it out. My own sisters told me this was normal and the guy said his dad did it and he was just normal. Not a single person was on my side and I was hurt and depressed. I left him and after some back and forth, it was forever. the court sided with him that I had deserted my marital home. I never went back, so disgusted. I hated men for a long time. I am now forty. I never want to feel what I felt being beaten and crushed and kicked and the secondary pain of being accused as the one who triggered him. Gosh. I hated life. Edit: thanks for the overwhelming support and those asking, I am fine now. Also, legally, he won because he was able to prove I ran away, which made him a victim of marital desertion. Double sucks. Also, I had to do therapy and I've been at it since 2019 after calling of an engagement in 2016. So, long road to recovery but getting there.
@Abigael Kenyans and lots of Christians believe in this. Back then, it was normal and accepted that being beaten was even approved by the bible. I had quotes and a pastor reading that BS to me. I hated them all because it was a female pastor telling me to go back to that. Gosh. We have come some ways as a country but it is still too far to go.
@@GraceMusyoka That is why religion and 'culture' are anathema in my every-day life. A lot of women have fallen victim to these two. Apparently, 'God hates divorce', being shunned by the church etc as well as the family/society not wanting to deal with or outright ostracising divorced women. Also, families not being a safe place for women undergoing violence..in the name of 'it happens all the time, it's normal, just go back and apologise to your husband..'
Pole sana. Recently an educated lady narrated to me how, many years ago, she was on the verge of returning to the man (beast) that beat her, almost to death...it's her relatives that wrestled her away from that home, and organized new job beginning for her - and instead of going to the new job, she almost went back to the beast that had severally abused her. I'm still shocked.
I don’t know who needs to hear this but: if you are dating someone and they “lose their temper” and yell at you, that is the only red flag you need to leave them. It will escalate. If someone you are dating can not communicate without yelling, that’s not a situation you need to be in. Apply this to anyone in your life that you need to.
That is my motto, but I had to learn the hard way. Once had an abusive girlfriend that would moan about everything and shout and scream, throw stuff at me and hit me for no reason. Since then I've put my foot down and if anyone raises their voice for no reason, I just say that's cool and show them the door. Life is short and not worth the hassle.
That one man, who spoke against violence against women, and said you don’t need violence to be respected by a woman, had folks staring at him as if he’s a lunatic
It's like men are conditioned to laugh at women. Look at the comedy shows we have; most make fun of women. On Twitter, men like Amerix and Ja Loka have a huge following because they reduce women to objects.
That woman who is helping those who suffered gender based violence needs a huge donations for her organization since she is doing more than enough. Rape and Gender based violence should never tolerated. This needs to stop!
So true Mohamed. The Kenyan women need to be given a number to call, so that they (& their children) will be picked up and escorted to safety. A netwọk of churches, providing refuge, will be effective.
As a woman in Kenya I definitely fear the risk of being a statistic of domestic violence. It’s rampant here. Marriage or relationships don’t appeal to me at all.
I am terribly sorry for the impossible conditions you are faced with. Where everyone is against women. Just because we don't have their strength and we don't have the "equipment" to rape 😡 I live in Romania and here things are not that bad anymore, but men have that tendency. After I married my ex said now he can do anything because I won't divorce him. There was no impediment to divorce him. Just a lot of hasssle and shaming from his family and mine onto me. But he became even more toxic and before he had a second chance to try to strangle me, I divorced him. Everyone blamed me saying I am the woman and I should do my job to be a proper wife and that's how I will have a happy marriage. Well, I choose my own health and sanity. And I congratulate you for putting your well-being and health first above devilish people that don't deserve you. Be strong and may God bless you and look after you 🥺 I wish you all the best, health and happiness, which can be gained even without men! They are an addition, not a must.
It's very true but you should not be siding women alone.A woman hates another woman,a man hates another man just because of love!A woman moves out of her house with an excuse that her husband is not providing enough for her. The truth is that you can't buy a vehicle, when it's not time to do so. We come from different backgrounds, coming together for the purpose of making a family and avoiding evil. A woman may come with curses from her family! But quite unfortunately if those particular curses start working, the society always emerges and start blaming a man. The truth; that if a girl saw her mother despising her father, she will also have to do so to her husband, just because of what she saw her mother doing to her husband! If you see any woman exposing the husband,cursed should be her daughter. BBC, sometimes don't become part the problem, just to be seen working but go deep. It's you people from the west who came up with incoherent ideas that a man is the same as a woman but today, you are trying separate yourselves from the consequences. This is not only happening in Kenya or Africa but also in both West and East! Don't demonize Africa because you are the ones who have been stealing from Africa since 18th century and after becoming rich as you leave it poor, you later on wanted this particular poor continent to adopt your lifestyle. Are you stupid or crazy?
@UKnow IKnow While I agree with you that some of what is going on in Africa is brought about by the African people themselves, you can disabuse yourself of blaming the transcontinental slave trade on the African people. Since the time ignorant people heard that African warring kingdoms took slaves amongst themselves during times of war, people like you have been latching on to this fact, trying to rewrite history, convincing yourselves that Europe and America were not responsible for the slave trade, but guess what? You are wrong!! The Europeans and Americans are solely responsible for the slave trade. African kingdoms took slaves before the white man came with his 'bag of tricks' , yes. Have you ever heard of prisoners of war? Yeah, the slaves within the ancient African Kingdoms were prisoners of war. They were prisoners of war enslaved by the conquering kingdom. Many of these slaves, if they were high ranking, would be ultimately ransomed by their kingdom. If not, they would serve time in enslavement, and a few years later be assimilated into the conquering tribe or kingdom. But of course, the white man came with trickery of freeing those prisoners still enslaved, and what do you know? They took them to Europe and the Americas in shackles. Plus these kingdom slaves were a drop in the bucket in the total numbers of the slaves shipped to the Americas. Most of the slaves shipped to the Americas were abducted from their villages, or waylaid on their way from their farms by the white slave traders, and put in shackles and shipped off from their shores, never to see their homes again.. So instead of pointing a finger and calling someone 'DUMMY', maybe you should point that finger at yourself.
@@kat64470 here, the only innocent people are children! Children must be given a first priority.This woman is frankly saying that she decided to move out because the husband was not providing either at all or enough!She trusted her body to be carrying more than one man as she feeds her children.She is a human being, her jailed husband as well !If you see a man harming a woman, there must be something. We are living in a world of freedom, whereby the world we are living today is 100 times, that of Sodom and Gomorrah.Women want much, they day and night render God's establiments useless as they adopt dog's or animal lifestyle, whereby nobody would ask a bitch that why 10 men at ago! Freedom or women's rights was a silent grave yard established!
It's so sad to see the little boy suffering from PTSD as a result of his father's savagery attack on the family. He is so traumatised that a sight of men makes his anxiety go up. I pray the mother and son can get therapy. Truly despeakable from the 'men' involved in such heinous and cowardly actions.
True, abuse of any kind affects a child mentally and psychological. The child has anxiety issues as you said. Or even an anxiety disorder. He should be taken for therapy
This one hit close to home. My brother is abusing his partner. The last time he hit her so bad she literally turned blue. I tried to support her by providing funds to leave and relocate to South Africa where she has relatives and friends who had arranged a job for her, but my mom and her family convinced to stay. Told her that my brother will grow up, he is just immature and all men go through such a phase. He is fucking 37 years old, he hit her while she carried their second born on her back, the child fell and hit her head and still he continued to punch the mother. I have never felt so much rage in my life. He has always been an asshole, a toddler in a grown man’s body with zero control over his emotions. Made my childhood hell! We live in different countries, the best i can do now is check in on her as often as possible but i know the abuse continues..verbal, emotional and physical abuse. My hands are tied, hopefully she will realize her worth one day and leave him. It’s not a Kenyan problem, it’s all over the world.
So sorry for what is happening in your family. I hope she makes it out of that relationship with her children. I'm South African and my parents were very abusive towards each other. They divorced after my school teacher called my mum in for a meeting and asked her what was happening at home because my behaviour was changing and I was experiencing regression. I love my parents but their divorce saved my life. I didn't understand it when I was a child but looking back now, I'm grateful for it. Please persistent in telling her to get out for her sake and the sake of her children. I notice many women thing it's shameful to divorce, but the alternative is worse because children who grow up in abuse are at risk of becoming abusers or marrying abusive partners because that is what was modeled to them and it becomes their normal and a generational cycle. I pray she savely comes to South Africa with her children and is safe and receives healing. Maybe ask her to come for a vacation and once she is here, take her to social workers who are trained in GBV to speak to her and give her the psychological help she needs. The service is free, even if she is foreign. Some clinics also offer counseling services and group therapy for free or call the national helpline or police (use national hotline and ask to be transfered to GBV helpline if the local police can't help) or NGO groups like Opendoors or heartlines (telephone counseling, in person counseling and safe houses for GBV survivors). All the best.
This is heartbreaking. Men need to hold each other to account. There is no excuse to hit or abuse women, or children, or men for that matter! We need to treat each other with love and respect.
This story had me crying, I pray for Mary & her son & any women & children that have been abused. This kind of violence must certainly stop immediately.
Very deeply insecure characters with nothing better to do with their lives apart from beating their spouses. These sort of men expect their wives to cook, clean and bring up children , after the women have been working hard to make ends meet. The little income the wife makes is grabbed from her so that he can spend it carelessly. I guess these useless men don't even spend quality time with their children. The same repetitive cycle evoles again and again.
As a man who grew up in an abusive home, that little boy is practically me! I am terrified of relationships. Part of me is afraid of being hurt, the other part is afraid I will end up like my step father, a violent and angry man!
YOU control yourself! No one or nothing will force you to beat the daylights out of a woman or child. You even control how you let others treat you. Leave the relationship if you are being GENUINELY disrespected.
Rest in your Spirit, my son. You will do well in relationships, because you're going to turn that negative experience into a positive one. Spend your life "making the devil out of a liar.". Show him that you'll be the opposite of the negativity that he placed you within.
Njeri is such a strong lady. Who comes to her aid when she feels like everything is bleak? All that good can be overwhelming at times. May the Lord continue to give her the strength to continue with this noble cause.
There is a whole ministry that is so out of touch with its name. All they do is hold parties for photo ops, until a woman reports violence. You'll never hear of them.
For sure. We have women representatives in this country who should be taking initiative in this kind of matters and all they do is sit pretty waiting for elections and we can continue electing them.
Domestic violence is a HUGE problem in Africa. In America, I have seen my Ghanaian mother stay even when my father has beaten her. Back home, the elders manipulate the women and young girls to think this type of behavior from man and other boys are okay and they should be quiet. But it is not. We have to do more Africa!!! Start treating women right!!
@@freegalsen5556 I have not been in all African countries, but I have seen documentaries and gotten to know different Africans with different cultures going through the same thing
@@pinklove8422 I understand where you are coming from but I agree with @Free Galsen, its not fair to generalise issues in different parts of the continent, especially when we don't lump up good things happening individual countries as one many times. Talking like that keeps making it seem the entire continent is dark and not growing. Just because we all "look the same" on the continent doesn't mean the samethings are happening the same way in our respective countries all the time 🙂
It emberasses people when the truth is spoken out, either because they too think this behaviour is normal or they are perpetrators themselves. But the truth must always be spoken. Many African women experience Gender based violence at the hands of their men. It must stop.
I applaud peter,the man talking to the crowd to respect women,the reporter,njeri i really applaud u all for standing for the truth!!!!to the victims...i pray for your healing
I am as well. So is my mother. So is my sister. It is not a Kenyan issue, we live in the West. It is a patriarchial, religious, control issue. Men need to take a serious look at themselves. Problem is they dont.
BBC is biased against Africa. You should try and watch documentaries produced for African audiences in Africa. Most good journalists here in Kenya started at the BBC and said they were manipulated into always reporting on sensationalism and never positive things going on here. Have you ever seen a documentary or report about Africa that isn’t portraying us as backward, stereotypically predisposed towards violent and poor? Hmmm… ever wondered why?
@@Ad-Lo genuine question but could you explain how bbc is biased against africa? i think these documentaries are kind of similar how vice does it. they expose problems in stigmatized countries that are not very mainstream because western media doesn’t care enough to report on it(other than the other rare instances when they actually do)
@@Ad-Lo I agree. I opted not to even watch this because all they report is negative. There are so many good things that go on as well. There’s awareness now about these issues, we did not need a documentary from BBC on this 🙄
As a 20 year old Kenyan girl who still dreams of having a wonderful and amazing marriage, am so disgusted by the men sitting around and glorifying domestic violence....its just sadddd and heartbreaking...I don't want to ever get married if domestic violence will still be a trend
Am really shocked of how openly the talk about beating there own wife's. And all of the men is laughing and applauding along as they have accomplished something great by doing so.. I swear to God that if I get a daughter (which I so badly want) and she ends up in a relationship where the man hits/beats her.. He will be in for a big surprise, I'll break both his legs and arms. And that's without any regrets.
@@Brother_frojd - You make sure you set the example by treating your spouse with the utmost respect, and instill confidence in her to create high self-esteem. Her chances are greatly improved when that happens.
This is heart wrenching. As a legal practitioner I have worked with Njeri Migwi on an advisory basis. It is really hard for victims of SGBV to get justice in Kenyan courts. Magistrates treat perpetrators of crime better than the victims. Corruption is a cancer in the criminal justice system. We as men can help by resolving not to hurt women and to teach younger men and boys that domestic violence has no place in modern society. Mary’s case is really sad.
Maybe we need to return to our Gikuyu traditions where husband's were controlled by their rika and summoned to stop domestic violence because the wife belonged to the clan , Stop the violence before it gets this bad, because I saw like the victims here are from our community
I have never commented of UA-cam. Even your Facebook. But I will now for the reason that you mentioned magistrates. Why are these "learned" fellows so backward in their thinking? I have so many questions regarding judges and magistrates, and how they administer laws in Kenya. Its disgusting. And the issue of bonds needs more than a comment.
As Africans we are taught a blurred version of respect which is highly overlapped with immense fear so in essence (fear=respect in African households )and I believe that's where the issue rises violence instills fear not respect..... fear is a mechanism for survival and respect is a privilege awarded to those who deserve it for being good people !!!!!
@@lynn_caris it's sad that till this far those are the standards that an average household is grounded upon and what can we do besides commenting on UA-cam videos ? It really breaks me as an African
@@tshegofatsophatlha8890 First we unlearn these things....We educate the people around us...especially our kids...Then we use our resourses to speak out...Dont underestimate a UA-cam comment like yours or a simple tweet...That's as much as we can do...
Toxic masculinity, which is a distorted understanding of what a man is, is what is taught to our boys..and this then leads to this epidemic of violence.
The boy child trying to protect the mother from male intruders in their compound was one of my most emotional moment in this video...may the society get rid of all men who abuse their women...you can't be aman if you can't protect awoman
Peter is a real man. Like the reporter. They both know there’s no excuse in killing/abusing children and women. The fact that Peter was shunned by his family is so disheartening. He should be praised as a community hero.
Unfortunately, gender-based violence against women and children has been so normalised in the name of 'disciplining' in society. It is painful how slow it is for victims of GBV to get justice. I wish the media could focus on highlighting these cruel acts and the government take necessary action against the perpetrators. In the same line, society (women and men) should be made aware of the oppressive social norms and how to end them.
GBV is terrible, in equal measures violence against children is heartbreaking (usually committed by women to children). And like you said, it's done in the name of Disciplining. The real hidden epidemic in most African societies is a general "culture of violence" on those weaker, regardless of gender. It's sad, and authority figures like Police and community leaders don't address it enough, instead they permit by calling it African culture. Emotional abuse through verbal insults and exclusionary practices is a growing problem. It truly does bother me.
This was so painful to watch, I saw how the reporter was holding back his tears and I could sense his pain. Kudos to Peter for taking a stand and doing the right thing.
The reporter goes to the ground to do research, files a case with a victim and witnesses how hard is it to get justice. But the head cop confidently give us a whole lot crap of plausible deniability. It is about time we agreed that our systems don't work.
I have actually reached to them sometime last year ,trying to get some help for my aunt & they just lied they wouod follow up. They took long and when I asked for the officer handling her case number, they blatantly refused to.I later learned the officer was bribed by the perpetrator and "killed "the case. The police force is a key facilitator in this issue. We have tried to engage a lawyer and he is equally frustrated by the police who are trying to protect on of their own.
We have to start teaching kids at a young age not to commit violence against girls/women or anyone. This challenge is going to hang over our heads silently; we have to demonstrate our manhood with humanity not violence. It was painful watching this doc.
The problem is our society has become gynocentric in the public, health and educational sectors, mental health has detoriated significantly among men, drug abuse is rampant everywhere in Kenya men are becoming herbivores chewing khat 24/7 and hardcore drunkards, men don't value family life anymore nowadays it seems as if most boys especially those ones in the ghetto don't have fathers, suicide is another thing that's eating up men, men can't express it because they are expected to be the stronger gender while in reality they are the weakest, Kenyan men are doomed instead of getting help they are being condemned someone tell BBC to stop projecting Kenyan men as the problem reality is they are actually in a worse condition than women
@Simon Nzioki First of all....We know not all Kenyan men are like this....Secondly, they are not the victims in this case...We do need to create more awareness to mental health as men are more affected...I agree with that...But we should also be accountable for things we do or let happen...GBV, rape and sodomy should be treated with all seriousness....
@@lynn_caris it's most likely a biased report something you would expect from today's feminists media trust me I have investigated on some gender based violence in marriages and most of the time it's usually foolish women lowering their standards to get into relationships with boys instead of gentlemen, am sure you would agree if you get married to a guy who likes drinking you should also factor in the risk of him becoming a useless and violent alcoholic and am becoming anti-equality everyday I watch one-sided biased reports for example; am currently in campus and you know that it is election period so politics is the hottest topic most of my male comrades are interested in becoming politicians, with most of them vying for leadership roles in the campus and most like arguing about political opinions on the other side our female comrades are less participative infact I think it's weird on their side to talk about politics come 20-30 years men are dominating the parliament and public posts then some idiotic feminist is going to blame government for not achieving 2/3 gender rule, 😏😏 Kenya is becoming messed up, women don't want to use their brains but want to be equal to men and currently we have a high ratio of boys than men
Thank you for sharing. I’m in America and have not only been a victim but am advocating for women that are abused. Our culture and laws are different here, but the abuse is the same. Most women don’t report it out of fear. Some that have reported get victimized by the system and again by the perpetrator. We need to keep teaching women and children things to look for and ways to get out if not educate how to see the “red flags” before they are get into abusive situations.. However, I know that within respect to other cultures, it is easier said than done. My heart goes out to these women and children. Don’t stop sharing their stories. ❤️
I'm in America also and women are very protected here. As a matter of fact where I live it goes both ways. You better think twice before you put a hand on your partner whether your male or female.
Watching this brought tears to my eyes. I know what it is like to live in constant fear. From when I was 7 to 16 years I had to watch my mom beaten, choked, kicked, strangled and once my stepfather tried to drown her in the bathtub which I was able to stop. Back then in Germany there was no help for these women. Thankfully it has changed know. I used to live 25 years in Jamaica and the mindset from men there are similar and by no means I mean all men's. I met women who told me if he doesn't beat you he does not love you. Police and politicians need to change the law and protect the women when they file charges. The family needs to stop hiding those criminals! May God bless people like this very brave Peter and you.
How shameful grown men talking about abusing their wives as a way to prove a point. Shameless….having young kids as victims of such heinous crimes by grown men is very saddening. These men need to be locked up.
I shudder to think of what could have become of my sister (my only sibling). If my parents and I didn't persuade her to leave an abusive marriage. She loved that brut and was scared of what society would think of her if she left that man. But my Mom said, " We'd rather you learn how to live with ridicule, than take you back home in a casket."
Is she today ever talking about going back to that thing of a beast, or has she managed to move on and leave him completely behind? I hope she has. No woman deserves to be beaten regardless of what.
Our mainstream media is just focused on politics day in day out . Thank you Tom and your team highlighting this and I pray that the victims of these grievous acts get justice.
i am still proud that people like peter and those who stood their ground for respect to women are still around. no matter how small their number are. they are what keep society intact and going, why values and morals are still alive and well.
The men who were justifying beating women...... Shame! Shame! Shame! This is heart breaking. A grown ass person never learnt you cannot discipline a child who is not your own?
This is one of the hardest docs I’ve ever watched. Imagine there is more of this violence that is uncovered. It is terrifying. JUSTICE JUSTICE JUSTICE MUST BE SERVED
Peter is a great, brave and courageous man whose sense of security is highly commendable if possible back with national and international honours and recognition
I wholeheartedly agree with you! I think that money need to be raised to help Peter to relocate, to a safe place. When his brother is released, his family will help him find and harm Peter otherwise.
Shame on us as a Nation. Let the entire world watch n get to know how sick our society is. In all these, all we our local media dwells on is the elections and who will be the next president. Pathetic. May God help us.
unfortunately this isn't only a hidden epidemic in Kenya or other african countries. Femicides are rising in whole Europe especially since Covid as well.
I was at a police station once at muthangari a woman came to report her husband for domestic violence. The officer would not book her case, he straight told her that domestic disputes are settled by the chief. I felt for her. Perhaps that's why on few cases are reported.
@@abdiazizadan76 this woman had visible injuries. She had been beaten to a pulp. So is that not a police case? Am confused. Perhaps that's why dv case escalate to murder. The chief and elders are ill equipped to handle these case because more often than not they send the woman back to the abuser with nothing than putting a bandaid on the situation.
Yes, Trevor Noah said a similar thing in his book. His step dad would abuse his mom and when she'd go to report it at the police station the police would laugh at her and refuse to record the case. Years later when he actually shot her, he was let go cause they considered him a first time offender.
@@shirleytatha8189 Wow! I’m disgusted with life reading this! Sometimes I dream of a version of ISIS with just armed feminists “cleaning” our streets from these murderers. Even animals don’t act like this.
@@shirleytatha8189 so sad. Most of the women and molested kids in our society never get justice not to mention the trauma they have to live with. And worse that some loose their lives and the abuser walks free.
Those group of men make me angry, uncomfortable and I feel disgusted. This shows how damaged the world is. At this point there's no hope in ending gender based violence, where does one even start?! 💔 Those are fathers, grandfathers and brothers. What are they teaching those childrens?🤷🏿♀️ 😭😭 Heartbreaking 💔
I’ll never understand why men go to the extent of hurting their partners, what’s the point of hurting your partner and even go to the extent of murdering your own child? Not even animals do this to their own. My heart truly breaks for Mary
I really waited for this to be covered. A disturbing topic that needed attention but GBV issues have been normalized that people don't find the need to keep the discussion alive. We live in a world where justice makes sense when its about us. This is a continuing problem that happens to both genders,not only in kenya but around the globe. It's about me and you. It does not only affect the victim's lives but everyone's mental well-being. The anger that comes with such cases is truly unbearable.!! We need more people to create awareness within the society and help the people unlearn unhealthy cultural ideologies that are contributing to this cuz some take it to an extreme and that doesn't justify why someone would murder!. Good work to the journalist and the strong victims that decided to share their stories with us . This is a close call. 😭
Mary is such a strong and beautiful woman. No one deserves what she’s been/going through. Hope the lil man gets treatment asap so he doesn’t have to live with the trauma. Love and prayers ❤️❤️
I commend the man who turned in his brother but he needs the support of friends and the community. I hope his family will see the light and be reunited. It's painful what happened to all the victims we need to change this blood letting is horrible
The perverse thing is that they will ask he apologizes and make amends for turning in his murderer of a brother. This is how you make sure people keep hiding monsters amongst ourselves.
Congratulation Peter with what you're doing the world is watching you and you're a Hero. Yes, women and innocent children are facing physical violence, sexual abuse, torture, etc. You're a mouth to those who are mouth less innocent victims, please I encourage you to continue to assist them and to guide them to get their justice. God bless you.
The cycle must stop in the home, from dismantling the toxic masculinity that places a weight on men to act a certain way to fit in with their peers, to giving women a voice that has power towards law enforcement. Thank goodness for the wonderful woman helping but she needs help! What a difficult thing to see
This is it. You are right. This protracted uprise of toxic masculinity will (if it hasn't already) cause a rampant spread of GBV. Women will be reduced to inanimate objects, and in response, men will be reduced to inanimate wallets. And it's a slippery slope from there. I hope more of us are able to join in and help out
The men laughing at the idea of it all sicken me🤮, the same men bringing up young boys and expects them to be anything different, as a society we really do have a long way to go.
Big love going to the men who live to expose, protect and even end this insane madness! Wishes and prayers of healing, health, hope and change to to the people of Motherland Africa! I love you and have been asking God to take the evil from your homeland and finally allow for the beautiful, kind, loving, strong people of Africa to experience peace,joy and comfort! I ask myself how, why? I am so troubled by the unspeakable truths of African reality! In this year of 2022 how and why has the government not haulted these dark and viscous habits? I do believe that once again, we should mainly judge and hold the government officials responsible for yet another unaddressed situation which should have long been irradicated! Thank you to the fine and brave men and women who work to expose and end this nightmare that causes so very much agony to so many families there! All true heroes 🙏🏽🙏🏽🤝🏽💜
Domestic violence is a crime!! It's a shame seeing men celebrating beating/abusing their women. It's a big shame for parents to discourage their daughters from going back home from an abusive relationship/ marriage. This society would be a better place with people like Njeri and Peter.
My heart goes out to Mary and her young son. We are still a long way away from where we want to be Africa but every step takes us closer. Thank you Africa eye for empowering Africans to tell their Story. Bravo to the reporter.
This is beyond sickening! I couldn’t imagine anyone harming my daughter! I’d rather her be alone than deal with this atrocity!! So glad my husband is gentle and loving. My heart goes out to anyone dealing or has dealt with domestic violence.
This was long overdue! I love what USIKIMYE organization are doing. I love this documentary. Violence against women and children is a violation of human rights. The problem is more prevalent in the grassroots. There needs to be an immediate culture shift in the place and worth of a woman in this country. Thanks BBC for covering this
This is so sad, people shouldn't go through this in their lives. Kenya is a long way away to solving this menace. But we will uproot this evil at all cost
It’s so disheartening for a this little boy to witnessed a horrible crime against his mother and sister. Any African man who thinks hitting a woman means demanding respect they are ignorant and abusive to their partner. I was raised by my grandma growing up in Africa, I never saw my grandma hits or curse anyone til she died, i grow up in a drug , alcohol and violence neighborhood. The first 5 years of any child life is the most important part of their future.
The Peter's, Njeris are literally some of the angels walking on earth. So much more is needed to be done to sensitise on the injustice and deep trauma caused by gbv. My prayers goes to victims of gender based violence and for those who only memories remain.
One can see the helplessness in Jerry’s eyes. I pray the public will support her organisation with money, items and all forms of help. Jerry needs help. Even emotional support because of all She has seen and heard with the victims she helps. Less talk, more action.
My heart goes out to the woman (survivors) of DV ! I am also a survivor and my hearts is torn as I watch this ! I’m asking is the a way I can help the women who lost her daughter and is taking care of her son alone ? I want to help her some how please reach out to me !
My own threatned to kill me severally and i ran for my life with my 2 small kids .Its been 2 years and God has been soo faithful, i treasure the peace of mind i have and i vowed to myself to never ever let any man disrespect me. I personally feel for the "wife of the man encouraging other men to beat their wives". May God set all the women and men free from their abusive spouses. God protect our kids too from these hyenas roaming around
Eye-opening and touching documentary. I am from the Caribbean so I see myself as an African descendent and it pains me to see my people living like this because i know we can do better.
This is a problem in all black communities around the world sister. Whether its in US, EU, Caribbean or Africa...everywhere in the world black women are subjected to black men violence.... When is it going to stop? Unless we divest from these communities we will always suffer...
@@paulinapaulina5855 As an Kenyan woman I 100% agree. Black women being abused is too normalised in black communities worldwide. I’m glad a lot of us black women are waking up. We know we deserve better❤️
Why is it eye-opening, we all know what it's like, even in the Caribbean, it's usually not this bad, with the machetes, but this is not surprising to me. This is why I roll my eyes, when people mention the motherland. I would never feel safe.
This is a powerful story, its truly disappointing what happens in our Africa and to see that this channel only has 840 000 subscribers and yet we have millions of people in Africa able to afford a phone, as a African we need to know African issues, for my people are destroyed for lack of knowledge rather than blaming Western countries though many problems in our continent derives from western countries so we should watch such news comment and share then comes the action to help our self selves as Africans.
"In African Culture, wife beating is like an initiation ceremony"....really? In this day and age there are people with such backward and primitive thinking? This is wrong and should not be condoned...kudos Tom for this great piece. I pray that the young boy and his mom will be able to heal and may the brother who turned his brother in be blessed.
This “primitive” thinking is dominant on the planet, it is the opposite that is new. In the IS, a black woman is killed every 6 hours by an intimate partner. The idea that woman are property is well established still in some mind.
I laud you on this expose. As African men, we have been misguidedly cultured to suppress women so as to 'run' our homes. It is in our circumcision songs, it is in how the older men in our lives model their manliness in our impressionable young presence. I doubt there is any African man who didn't harbor some form of aggressive tendency and often against a woman. Men need to get to a forum to dissuade one another from the perception that women 'must' be under their absolute control, and that women deserve a chance to find their potential in society. However we cannot lump up murderers and abusers with all forms of domestic violence and succeed in curbing the crimes in domestic violence.
I know of two cases in Kenya where men killed their wives then they run to the police station to surrender and shortly after they walked free. The first case took place in Nakuru region where a man killed his wife using an iron rod. After surrendering he was arrested briefly n a few months later he was seen in the village going about his business as if he had done nothing major. The second case happed in Njoro. I watched the story on UA-cam where the sister of the girl who was killed by her boyfriend was narrating the story to an interviewer. She said after surrendering, the perpetrator was released just a few days later n his family was telling her she needs to go to their home so they can conduct a cleansing ceremony on their son. The audacity of it just shocked me. This family was not even remorseful for what their son had done. I dont know how surrendering yourself after committing a murder signifies innocence in Kenya.
In fact the reason why most surrender themselves to the police is because they fear they will be killed by the community. It has got nothing to do with admitting to the crime but saving themselves from mob justice. Ni the same na vile when a driver runs over someone they abandon their cars and run to the police station, its a safety mechanism to avoid being killed by the crowd via mob justice.
No one is clapping for the man who is trying to talk some sense into those men about treating a woman with respect. This speaks volume about the culture in this society.
Worked with a sexual harasser for many years.....heard he finally got fired last year. Took them long enough.
Not culture, poverty and lack of resources. Women are battered all over the world.
Riiiiiiight it takes so much bravery to stand in front of people who don't have the same opinion as you and for you to still say yours
And then try integrating these into the Western European society 🙄
I suppose he is the facilitator,one of those who organised the event.
Peter is a true hero for handing over his brother to the police. The world would be a much better place if we had more people like him
Imagine being shunned from his family for protecting society from a murderer!
agreed man, I admire him and wish him all the best. In my opinion he is a real man, must not have been easy to turn in his own brother but when he has murdered a child, how could you ever think of doing anything else?? I respect you Peter, and I hope he can see the amount of respect he has garnered from people living all over the world.
A true hero. When it comes to matters such as this, the sanctity of life must win.
This man has justified himself in the eyes of God and has escaped a generational curse.He should rejoice in his heart knowing he’s free from that curse which will follow that family
sure even when it is your own son, just hand him over. You will protect him and he will kill you one day!! A person who sheds blood over no defense to self belongs to JAIL!
I was 26 years, at the prime of my life with a fresh degree and working as a management graduate trainee. I got married and three months in, my husband hit me. I lost my hearing (but it was temporary, and I resumed near full hearing after five years). When it happened, all my relatives told me to talk it out. My own sisters told me this was normal and the guy said his dad did it and he was just normal. Not a single person was on my side and I was hurt and depressed. I left him and after some back and forth, it was forever. the court sided with him that I had deserted my marital home. I never went back, so disgusted. I hated men for a long time. I am now forty. I never want to feel what I felt being beaten and crushed and kicked and the secondary pain of being accused as the one who triggered him. Gosh. I hated life.
Edit: thanks for the overwhelming support and those asking, I am fine now. Also, legally, he won because he was able to prove I ran away, which made him a victim of marital desertion. Double sucks. Also, I had to do therapy and I've been at it since 2019 after calling of an engagement in 2016. So, long road to recovery but getting there.
So sorry Grace. I'm glad you gathered the courage to pack and leave.
@Abigael Kenyans and lots of Christians believe in this. Back then, it was normal and accepted that being beaten was even approved by the bible. I had quotes and a pastor reading that BS to me. I hated them all because it was a female pastor telling me to go back to that. Gosh. We have come some ways as a country but it is still too far to go.
@@GraceMusyoka That is why religion and 'culture' are anathema in my every-day life. A lot of women have fallen victim to these two. Apparently, 'God hates divorce', being shunned by the church etc as well as the family/society not wanting to deal with or outright ostracising divorced women. Also, families not being a safe place for women undergoing violence..in the name of 'it happens all the time, it's normal, just go back and apologise to your husband..'
Sorry to hear your story.
Pole sana. Recently an educated lady narrated to me how, many years ago, she was on the verge of returning to the man (beast) that beat her, almost to death...it's her relatives that wrestled her away from that home, and organized new job beginning for her - and instead of going to the new job, she almost went back to the beast that had severally abused her.
I'm still shocked.
"A man who fights a woman is a coward" I really like this kudos to that man..
Who said so ???
@@edwardngugi3537 your fellow man with brains and respect for women..
Valentina are Married. Am sure you are not
You mean physically right?
It's in the Bible
I don’t know who needs to hear this but: if you are dating someone and they “lose their temper” and yell at you, that is the only red flag you need to leave them. It will escalate. If someone you are dating can not communicate without yelling, that’s not a situation you need to be in. Apply this to anyone in your life that you need to.
That is my motto, but I had to learn the hard way. Once had an abusive girlfriend that would moan about everything and shout and scream, throw stuff at me and hit me for no reason. Since then I've put my foot down and if anyone raises their voice for no reason, I just say that's cool and show them the door. Life is short and not worth the hassle.
I think this can be misunderstood.Maybe...I had an instance like this happen with someone I am dating.
It's said love makes one blind, but i think it makes also deaf and dumb
That is a bit harsh people get angry and raise there voice dosent mean they will become voilent
💯
Peter puts morals above family. The world needs more people like him.
So sad to see such men advocating for violence
@@janetsutton8204 ua-cam.com/video/RZZKI2fJx58/v-deo.html
Rip Mz
An upright man.
A man if integrity, God will reward you
The way this men belittle women, the mothers of their children , their sisters , their aunties , mmh Time is coming men you'll pay ,
That one man, who spoke against violence against women, and said you don’t need violence to be respected by a woman, had folks staring at him as if he’s a lunatic
It's so heartbreaking seeing men laughing about such a serious matter. Our society is very rotten
Correct
Yeah..it was very hard to watch them. Makes me sick. And those are our fathers, brothers, husbands and sons. We are in trouble..
Not all of us condone gender-based violence
It's like men are conditioned to laugh at women. Look at the comedy shows we have; most make fun of women. On Twitter, men like Amerix and Ja Loka have a huge following because they reduce women to objects.
I pity and fear for the women who end up with such men
That woman who is helping those who suffered gender based violence needs a huge donations for her organization since she is doing more than enough. Rape and Gender based violence should never tolerated. This needs to stop!
So true Mohamed. The Kenyan women need to be given a number to call, so that they (& their children) will be picked up and escorted to safety. A netwọk of churches, providing refuge, will be effective.
Exactly.. Actually the Kenyan government must establish resources to empower alot of women.
She's doing more by herself than a whole government!! What a shame😥
You can support her page Usikimye... She is doin an amazing job her name is njeri wa migwi
@@lizahakinyi9564 Thank you for this
As a woman in Kenya I definitely fear the risk of being a statistic of domestic violence. It’s rampant here. Marriage or relationships don’t appeal to me at all.
This just breaks my 💔 heart...I cry out to God all the time everyone in world...This is soo undeserving..
Which is why I never married and it is the best thing I did. May sound selfish to some but it is my life.
I am terribly sorry for the impossible conditions you are faced with. Where everyone is against women. Just because we don't have their strength and we don't have the "equipment" to rape 😡
I live in Romania and here things are not that bad anymore, but men have that tendency. After I married my ex said now he can do anything because I won't divorce him. There was no impediment to divorce him. Just a lot of hasssle and shaming from his family and mine onto me.
But he became even more toxic and before he had a second chance to try to strangle me, I divorced him.
Everyone blamed me saying I am the woman and I should do my job to be a proper wife and that's how I will have a happy marriage.
Well, I choose my own health and sanity.
And I congratulate you for putting your well-being and health first above devilish people that don't deserve you.
Be strong and may God bless you and look after you 🥺 I wish you all the best, health and happiness, which can be gained even without men! They are an addition, not a must.
Very true one often lives with the fear that their patner might turn on them one day...
Come to America
My heart is breaking for the women and children of Kenya and the world. End gender based violence
It's very true but you should not be siding women alone.A woman hates another woman,a man hates another man just because of love!A woman moves out of her house with an excuse that her husband is not providing enough for her.
The truth is that you can't buy a vehicle, when it's not time to do so.
We come from different backgrounds, coming together for the purpose of making a family and avoiding evil.
A woman may come with curses from her family! But quite unfortunately if those particular curses start working, the society always emerges and start blaming a man.
The truth; that if a girl saw her mother despising her father, she will also have to do so to her husband, just because of what she saw her mother doing to her husband!
If you see any woman exposing the husband,cursed should be her daughter.
BBC, sometimes don't become part the problem, just to be seen working but go deep.
It's you people from the west who came up with incoherent ideas that a man is the same as a woman but today, you are trying separate yourselves from the consequences.
This is not only happening in Kenya or Africa but also in both West and East! Don't demonize Africa because you are the ones who have been stealing from Africa since 18th century and after becoming rich as you leave it poor, you later on wanted this particular poor continent to adopt your lifestyle.
Are you stupid or crazy?
How can we assist these women and children?
@UKnow IKnow
While I agree with you that some of what is going on in Africa is brought about by the African people themselves, you can disabuse yourself of blaming the transcontinental slave trade on the African people. Since the time ignorant people heard that African warring kingdoms took slaves amongst themselves during times of war, people like you have been latching on to this fact, trying to rewrite history, convincing yourselves that Europe and America were not responsible for the slave trade, but guess what? You are wrong!! The Europeans and Americans are solely responsible for the slave trade.
African kingdoms took slaves before the white man came with his 'bag of tricks' , yes. Have you ever heard of prisoners of war? Yeah, the slaves within the ancient African Kingdoms were prisoners of war. They were prisoners of war enslaved by the conquering kingdom. Many of these slaves, if they were high ranking, would be ultimately ransomed by their kingdom. If not, they would serve time in enslavement, and a few years later be assimilated into the conquering tribe or kingdom. But of course, the white man came with trickery of freeing those prisoners still enslaved, and what do you know? They took them to Europe and the Americas in shackles. Plus these kingdom slaves were a drop in the bucket in the total numbers of the slaves shipped to the Americas. Most of the slaves shipped to the Americas were abducted from their villages, or waylaid on their way from their farms by the white slave traders, and put in shackles and shipped off from their shores, never to see their homes again..
So instead of pointing a finger and calling someone 'DUMMY', maybe you should point that finger at yourself.
@@kat64470 here, the only innocent people are children! Children must be given a first priority.This woman is frankly saying that she decided to move out because the husband was not providing either at all or enough!She trusted her body to be carrying more than one man as she feeds her children.She is a human being, her jailed husband as well !If you see a man harming a woman, there must be something.
We are living in a world of freedom, whereby the world we are living today is 100 times, that of Sodom and Gomorrah.Women want much, they day and night render God's establiments useless as they adopt dog's or animal lifestyle, whereby nobody would ask a bitch that why 10 men at ago! Freedom or women's rights was a silent grave yard established!
Easy said than done. You have to educate the men to stop seeing a w0man as rival. 😕
That small boy who witnessed the mother's ordeal May God interven and give him the healing he deserves. No child should experience such.
He also needs therapy.....his mother too....hope well wishers will intervene and help her with her child
Poor kid is probably damaged forever
Amen
Amen
Ameeeeeeeeeen.....
It's so sad to see the little boy suffering from PTSD as a result of his father's savagery attack on the family. He is so traumatised that a sight of men makes his anxiety go up. I pray the mother and son can get therapy. Truly despeakable from the 'men' involved in such heinous and cowardly actions.
True, abuse of any kind affects a child mentally and psychological. The child has anxiety issues as you said. Or even an anxiety disorder. He should be taken for therapy
I am proud of PETER for handing over his brother to the police we can do better as men this is wrong
Me too!
I agree 100%
This one hit close to home. My brother is abusing his partner. The last time he hit her so bad she literally turned blue. I tried to support her by providing funds to leave and relocate to South Africa where she has relatives and friends who had arranged a job for her, but my mom and her family convinced to stay. Told her that my brother will grow up, he is just immature and all men go through such a phase. He is fucking 37 years old, he hit her while she carried their second born on her back, the child fell and hit her head and still he continued to punch the mother. I have never felt so much rage in my life. He has always been an asshole, a toddler in a grown man’s body with zero control over his emotions. Made my childhood hell!
We live in different countries, the best i can do now is check in on her as often as possible but i know the abuse continues..verbal, emotional and physical abuse. My hands are tied, hopefully she will realize her worth one day and leave him. It’s not a Kenyan problem, it’s all over the world.
Thank you for being there for her and showing her support despite the perpetrator being your brother. You're doing good. I applaud you
So sorry for what is happening in your family. I hope she makes it out of that relationship with her children. I'm South African and my parents were very abusive towards each other. They divorced after my school teacher called my mum in for a meeting and asked her what was happening at home because my behaviour was changing and I was experiencing regression. I love my parents but their divorce saved my life. I didn't understand it when I was a child but looking back now, I'm grateful for it. Please persistent in telling her to get out for her sake and the sake of her children. I notice many women thing it's shameful to divorce, but the alternative is worse because children who grow up in abuse are at risk of becoming abusers or marrying abusive partners because that is what was modeled to them and it becomes their normal and a generational cycle. I pray she savely comes to South Africa with her children and is safe and receives healing. Maybe ask her to come for a vacation and once she is here, take her to social workers who are trained in GBV to speak to her and give her the psychological help she needs. The service is free, even if she is foreign. Some clinics also offer counseling services and group therapy for free or call the national helpline or police (use national hotline and ask to be transfered to GBV helpline if the local police can't help) or NGO groups like Opendoors or heartlines (telephone counseling, in person counseling and safe houses for GBV survivors).
All the best.
I'm South African please bring her here
Checking on her ass will not be enough,soon she might end up dead by him and you live with the regrets forever..do more till she leaves him
@@Tt-iu4vk would you say that men who abuse their wives or women should get 20 years in prison
This is heartbreaking. Men need to hold each other to account. There is no excuse to hit or abuse women, or children, or men for that matter! We need to treat each other with love and respect.
Black men don't do accountability... They don't understand the concept of it.
A man who fights a woman is a coward. I hope that the society will change its mentality on gender based violence. Thank you for sharing 🙏🏾
What if the woman want to kill the man ?
@yemmydboss as they should, if someone would grab and harm my small child all bets are off.
what about a woman who fights a man?
@@Olori-Ogun a woman that fights a man is a pure narcissist. #notoviolence
@@ramadhankakai7303 a woman that fights a man is a pure narcissist. #notoviolence
This story had me crying, I pray for Mary & her son & any women & children that have been abused. This kind of violence must certainly stop immediately.
That man advocating for violemce is very disgusting 🤮🤮 Those kinds of men have serious low self esteem
Very deeply insecure characters with nothing better to do with their lives apart from beating their spouses. These sort of men expect their wives to cook, clean and bring up children , after the women have been working hard to make ends meet. The little income the wife makes is grabbed from her so that he can spend it carelessly. I guess these useless men don't even spend quality time with their children. The same repetitive cycle evoles again and again.
That was s at an. Not a man
It's true usipopiga mwanamke haezi kueshimu
@@josphatongaya4740 tofauti yako na ng'ombe ni wewe unaongea.
@@cherutokiboi6881 kalenjins ndo ngombe
As a man who grew up in an abusive home, that little boy is practically me! I am terrified of relationships. Part of me is afraid of being hurt, the other part is afraid I will end up like my step father, a violent and angry man!
You are on a good Way of not beeing the violent Person. Self awareness is the Key. Not every abused Person turned to an abuser.
YOU control yourself! No one or nothing will force you to beat the daylights out of a woman or child.
You even control how you let others treat you. Leave the relationship if you are being GENUINELY disrespected.
Rest in your Spirit, my son. You will do well in relationships, because you're going to turn that negative experience into a positive one. Spend your life "making the devil out of a liar.". Show him that you'll be the opposite of the negativity that he placed you within.
The fact you are aware of it is proof you won’t end up like your step father 💕
🙏🏾
Njeri is such a strong lady.
Who comes to her aid when she feels like everything is bleak? All that good can be overwhelming at times.
May the Lord continue to give her the strength to continue with this noble cause.
This woman is doing what the government should. It's shameful.
There is a whole ministry that is so out of touch with its name. All they do is hold parties for photo ops, until a woman reports violence. You'll never hear of them.
Her name is Njeri
@@elijahmurigi2413 SAD.
We literally have WOMEN REPS they could be the ones partnering up with a kind lady like this but they dont care
For sure. We have women representatives in this country who should be taking initiative in this kind of matters and all they do is sit pretty waiting for elections and we can continue electing them.
Domestic violence is a HUGE problem in Africa. In America, I have seen my Ghanaian mother stay even when my father has beaten her. Back home, the elders manipulate the women and young girls to think this type of behavior from man and other boys are okay and they should be quiet. But it is not. We have to do more Africa!!! Start treating women right!!
Have u been in all African countries??
Stop your généralisation pffff
@@freegalsen5556 I have not been in all African countries, but I have seen documentaries and gotten to know different Africans with different cultures going through the same thing
@@pinklove8422 I understand where you are coming from but I agree with @Free Galsen, its not fair to generalise issues in different parts of the continent, especially when we don't lump up good things happening individual countries as one many times. Talking like that keeps making it seem the entire continent is dark and not growing. Just because we all "look the same" on the continent doesn't mean the samethings are happening the same way in our respective countries all the time 🙂
Shut up. Nonsense
It emberasses people when the truth is spoken out, either because they too think this behaviour is normal or they are perpetrators themselves.
But the truth must always be spoken.
Many African women experience Gender based violence at the hands of their men. It must stop.
I applaud peter,the man talking to the crowd to respect women,the reporter,njeri i really applaud u all for standing for the truth!!!!to the victims...i pray for your healing
As a domestic violence survivor, this breaks my heart. I am glad I gathered the courage to escape when I could.
Thank God, for being with you and for giving you the mind to get out and to find a safe place to go!
Way to go..run!!
I am as well. So is my mother. So is my sister. It is not a Kenyan issue, we live in the West. It is a patriarchial, religious, control issue. Men need to take a serious look at themselves. Problem is they dont.
This presenter is quite good, should get him to cover future documents around Africa
BBC is biased against Africa. You should try and watch documentaries produced for African audiences in Africa. Most good journalists here in Kenya started at the BBC and said they were manipulated into always reporting on sensationalism and never positive things going on here. Have you ever seen a documentary or report about Africa that isn’t portraying us as backward, stereotypically predisposed towards violent and poor? Hmmm… ever wondered why?
Have you got any recommendations where I should begin my search for such documentaries?
@@Ad-Lo genuine question but could you explain how bbc is biased against africa? i think these documentaries are kind of similar how vice does it. they expose problems in stigmatized countries that are not very mainstream because western media doesn’t care enough to report on it(other than the other rare instances when they actually do)
@@Ad-Lo I agree. I opted not to even watch this because all they report is negative. There are so many good things that go on as well. There’s awareness now about these issues, we did not need a documentary from BBC on this 🙄
@@Ad-Lo that's true brother,. I've never seen any positive documentary in Africa
As a 20 year old Kenyan girl who still dreams of having a wonderful and amazing marriage, am so disgusted by the men sitting around and glorifying domestic violence....its just sadddd and heartbreaking...I don't want to ever get married if domestic violence will still be a trend
its wrong to beat up a woman just sit down and settle your issues together
Am really shocked of how openly the talk about beating there own wife's. And all of the men is laughing and applauding along as they have accomplished something great by doing so..
I swear to God that if I get a daughter (which I so badly want) and she ends up in a relationship where the man hits/beats her.. He will be in for a big surprise, I'll break both his legs and arms. And that's without any regrets.
@@Brother_frojd good job FATHER! Men need 2 handle men, if they want the remaining women 2 listen 2 them.
Kama ukona attitude ama weni toxic kaa kwa nyumba ya mamako.
@@Brother_frojd - You make sure you set the example by treating your spouse with the utmost respect, and instill confidence in her to create high self-esteem. Her chances are greatly improved when that happens.
This is heart wrenching. As a legal practitioner I have worked with Njeri Migwi on an advisory basis. It is really hard for victims of SGBV to get justice in Kenyan courts. Magistrates treat perpetrators of crime better than the victims. Corruption is a cancer in the criminal justice system. We as men can help by resolving not to hurt women and to teach younger men and boys that domestic violence has no place in modern society. Mary’s case is really sad.
Please share her contact so we donate
Much Respect,Senior.
Maybe we need to return to our Gikuyu traditions where husband's were controlled by their rika and summoned to stop domestic violence because the wife belonged to the clan , Stop the violence before it gets this bad, because I saw like the victims here are from our community
@@janendegwa5462 what does rika mean? If you don't mind me asking.
I have never commented of UA-cam. Even your Facebook. But I will now for the reason that you mentioned magistrates.
Why are these "learned" fellows so backward in their thinking? I have so many questions regarding judges and magistrates, and how they administer laws in Kenya. Its disgusting.
And the issue of bonds needs more than a comment.
As Africans we are taught a blurred version of respect which is highly overlapped with immense fear so in essence (fear=respect in African households )and I believe that's where the issue rises violence instills fear not respect..... fear is a mechanism for survival and respect is a privilege awarded to those who deserve it for being good people !!!!!
That explains it. You can fear someone and not respect them. Most people dont comprehend the difference.
@@lynn_caris it's sad that till this far those are the standards that an average household is grounded upon and what can we do besides commenting on UA-cam videos ? It really breaks me as an African
@@tshegofatsophatlha8890 First we unlearn these things....We educate the people around us...especially our kids...Then we use our resourses to speak out...Dont underestimate a UA-cam comment like yours or a simple tweet...That's as much as we can do...
Same in the ghettos of America.
Toxic masculinity, which is a distorted understanding of what a man is, is what is taught to our boys..and this then leads to this epidemic of violence.
The boy child trying to protect the mother from male intruders in their compound was one of my most emotional moment in this video...may the society get rid of all men who abuse their women...you can't be aman if you can't protect awoman
N STOP tryna punch down on us. Nobody respects u when u do!
That comment would make you think Woman dont do evil things. Why not get rid of all Evil Individuals no matter which Gender?
Peter is a real man. Like the reporter. They both know there’s no excuse in killing/abusing children and women. The fact that Peter was shunned by his family is so disheartening. He should be praised as a community hero.
Unfortunately, gender-based violence against women and children has been so normalised in the name of 'disciplining' in society. It is painful how slow it is for victims of GBV to get justice. I wish the media could focus on highlighting these cruel acts and the government take necessary action against the perpetrators. In the same line, society (women and men) should be made aware of the oppressive social norms and how to end them.
How can one discipline his grown woman? 😳 thats the shocking part
GBV is terrible, in equal measures violence against children is heartbreaking (usually committed by women to children). And like you said, it's done in the name of Disciplining.
The real hidden epidemic in most African societies is a general "culture of violence" on those weaker, regardless of gender. It's sad, and authority figures like Police and community leaders don't address it enough, instead they permit by calling it African culture.
Emotional abuse through verbal insults and exclusionary practices is a growing problem. It truly does bother me.
@@firdowzaabdullahi6001 these men, seem to build NOTHING
@@kathleenking47 FACTS
This was so painful to watch, I saw how the reporter was holding back his tears and I could sense his pain. Kudos to Peter for taking a stand and doing the right thing.
Very true.
The reporter goes to the ground to do research, files a case with a victim and witnesses how hard is it to get justice. But the head cop confidently give us a whole lot crap of plausible deniability. It is about time we agreed that our systems don't work.
I have actually reached to them sometime last year ,trying to get some help for my aunt & they just lied they wouod follow up. They took long and when I asked for the officer handling her case number, they blatantly refused to.I later learned the officer was bribed by the perpetrator and "killed "the case. The police force is a key facilitator in this issue. We have tried to engage a lawyer and he is equally frustrated by the police who are trying to protect on of their own.
Talk of gas light. Majorly gas lighting us as if we don't know how corrupt these cops are. She herself looks fattened by dirty money
Peter is the best brother in law every woman would like to have.... thank u Peter
Thank you, Peter, for being a protector and helping to keep your community safe 🙏
26 minutes is not even enough to cover this epidemic in Kenya, I pray that people will find their humanity
Peter chose justice over family (the brother) . If in this world we could have people like him , the the world would be a better place to live.
Absolutely it would. He did the right thing.
If I were Peter I would even disown my own family for protecting the killer in the family. Peter you’re better off without your family.
We have to start teaching kids at a young age not to commit violence against girls/women or anyone. This challenge is going to hang over our heads silently; we have to demonstrate our manhood with humanity not violence. It was painful watching this doc.
Speak!!
The problem is our society has become gynocentric in the public, health and educational sectors, mental health has detoriated significantly among men, drug abuse is rampant everywhere in Kenya men are becoming herbivores chewing khat 24/7 and hardcore drunkards, men don't value family life anymore nowadays it seems as if most boys especially those ones in the ghetto don't have fathers, suicide is another thing that's eating up men, men can't express it because they are expected to be the stronger gender while in reality they are the weakest, Kenyan men are doomed instead of getting help they are being condemned someone tell BBC to stop projecting Kenyan men as the problem reality is they are actually in a worse condition than women
@Simon Nzioki First of all....We know not all Kenyan men are like this....Secondly, they are not the victims in this case...We do need to create more awareness to mental health as men are more affected...I agree with that...But we should also be accountable for things we do or let happen...GBV, rape and sodomy should be treated with all seriousness....
@@lynn_caris it's most likely a biased report something you would expect from today's feminists media trust me I have investigated on some gender based violence in marriages and most of the time it's usually foolish women lowering their standards to get into relationships with boys instead of gentlemen, am sure you would agree if you get married to a guy who likes drinking you should also factor in the risk of him becoming a useless and violent alcoholic and am becoming anti-equality everyday I watch one-sided biased reports for example; am currently in campus and you know that it is election period so politics is the hottest topic most of my male comrades are interested in becoming politicians, with most of them vying for leadership roles in the campus and most like arguing about political opinions on the other side our female comrades are less participative infact I think it's weird on their side to talk about politics come 20-30 years men are dominating the parliament and public posts then some idiotic feminist is going to blame government for not achieving 2/3 gender rule, 😏😏 Kenya is becoming messed up, women don't want to use their brains but want to be equal to men and currently we have a high ratio of boys than men
@@simonnzioki5679 so we should blame the "boys"?. They're still MEN.
Thank you for sharing.
I’m in America and have not only been a victim but am advocating for women that are abused. Our culture and laws are different here, but the abuse is the same. Most women don’t report it out of fear. Some that have reported get victimized by the system and again by the perpetrator.
We need to keep teaching women and children things to look for and ways to get out if not educate how to see the “red flags” before they are get into abusive situations.. However, I know that within respect to other cultures, it is easier said than done.
My heart goes out to these women and children.
Don’t stop sharing their stories. ❤️
I'm in America also and women are very protected here. As a matter of fact where I live it goes both ways. You better think twice before you put a hand on your partner whether your male or female.
Watching this brought tears to my eyes. I know what it is like to live in constant fear. From when I was 7 to 16 years I had to watch my mom beaten, choked, kicked, strangled and once my stepfather tried to drown her in the bathtub which I was able to stop. Back then in Germany there was no help for these women. Thankfully it has changed know. I used to live 25 years in Jamaica and the mindset from men there are similar and by no means I mean all men's. I met women who told me if he doesn't beat you he does not love you. Police and politicians need to change the law and protect the women when they file charges. The family needs to stop hiding those criminals! May God bless people like this very brave Peter and you.
@stavros333 beautiful said
How shameful grown men talking about abusing their wives as a way to prove a point. Shameless….having young kids as victims of such heinous crimes by grown men is very saddening. These men need to be locked up.
We have a philosophical crisis and no one is raising this issue.
I shudder to think of what could have become of my sister (my only sibling). If my parents and I didn't persuade her to leave an abusive marriage. She loved that brut and was scared of what society would think of her if she left that man.
But my Mom said, " We'd rather you learn how to live with ridicule, than take you back home in a casket."
Is she today ever talking about going back to that thing of a beast, or has she managed to move on and leave him completely behind?
I hope she has. No woman deserves to be beaten regardless of what.
@@Brother_frojd She healed and moved on years ago, even found a man I'm proud to call brother-in-law.
@@ngashjr thank God.
Our mainstream media is just focused on politics day in day out . Thank you Tom and your team highlighting this and I pray that the victims of these grievous acts get justice.
☑️☑️
so many things happen out here, so many things,,
Our media stations are owned by the politicians what do you expect.... Its really sad, i never advocate for GBV at all
You people do not watch news or listen to the radio. This cases are always there. Just listen you will here them.
@@MachineryMasters101 these politicians actually do even worse.
i am still proud that people like peter and those who stood their ground for respect to women are still around. no matter how small their number are. they are what keep society intact and going, why values and morals are still alive and well.
Man i feel the pain of Kenyan women. Here in India too we have huge problem with violence against women.
The men who were justifying beating women...... Shame! Shame! Shame! This is heart breaking. A grown ass person never learnt you cannot discipline a child who is not your own?
Discipline women indeed. What crazy thinking is that? No justification whatsoever for beating your wife.
This is one of the hardest docs I’ve ever watched. Imagine there is more of this violence that is uncovered. It is terrifying. JUSTICE JUSTICE JUSTICE MUST BE SERVED
Peter is a great, brave and courageous man whose sense of security is highly commendable if possible back with national and international honours and recognition
Peter is a man of integrity, if more people were like him more murderers would be arrested for their heinous crimes against women and children.
I wholeheartedly agree with you! I think that money need to be raised to help Peter to relocate, to a safe place. When his brother is released, his family will help him find and harm Peter otherwise.
Unfortunately people of integrity are few on this earth while majority are fake....
*I hope Peter knows he is better off without his so called ‘family’… I hope God blesses him for his courage!*
He should just move away from home and go far far away
Shame on us as a Nation. Let the entire world watch n get to know how sick our society is. In all these, all we our local media dwells on is the elections and who will be the next president. Pathetic. May God help us.
unfortunately this isn't only a hidden epidemic in Kenya or other african countries. Femicides are rising in whole Europe especially since Covid as well.
I was at a police station once at muthangari a woman came to report her husband for domestic violence. The officer would not book her case, he straight told her that domestic disputes are settled by the chief. I felt for her. Perhaps that's why on few cases are reported.
Its true domestic cases are settled by the chief and council of elders. But rape and sodomy is serious police case and should be handled with agency.
@@abdiazizadan76 this woman had visible injuries. She had been beaten to a pulp. So is that not a police case? Am confused. Perhaps that's why dv case escalate to murder. The chief and elders are ill equipped to handle these case because more often than not they send the woman back to the abuser with nothing than putting a bandaid on the situation.
Yes, Trevor Noah said a similar thing in his book. His step dad would abuse his mom and when she'd go to report it at the police station the police would laugh at her and refuse to record the case. Years later when he actually shot her, he was let go cause they considered him a first time offender.
@@shirleytatha8189 Wow! I’m disgusted with life reading this!
Sometimes I dream of a version of ISIS with just armed feminists “cleaning” our streets from these murderers. Even animals don’t act like this.
@@shirleytatha8189 so sad. Most of the women and molested kids in our society never get justice not to mention the trauma they have to live with. And worse that some loose their lives and the abuser walks free.
Those group of men make me angry, uncomfortable and I feel disgusted. This shows how damaged the world is. At this point there's no hope in ending gender based violence, where does one even start?! 💔 Those are fathers, grandfathers and brothers. What are they teaching those childrens?🤷🏿♀️ 😭😭 Heartbreaking 💔
I’ll never understand why men go to the extent of hurting their partners, what’s the point of hurting your partner and even go to the extent of murdering your own child? Not even animals do this to their own. My heart truly breaks for Mary
I really waited for this to be covered. A disturbing topic that needed attention but GBV issues have been normalized that people don't find the need to keep the discussion alive. We live in a world where justice makes sense when its about us. This is a continuing problem that happens to both genders,not only in kenya but around the globe. It's about me and you. It does not only affect the victim's lives but everyone's mental well-being. The anger that comes with such cases is truly unbearable.!! We need more people to create awareness within the society and help the people unlearn unhealthy cultural ideologies that are contributing to this cuz some take it to an extreme and that doesn't justify why someone would murder!. Good work to the journalist and the strong victims that decided to share their stories with us . This is a close call. 😭
Mary is such a strong and beautiful woman. No one deserves what she’s been/going through. Hope the lil man gets treatment asap so he doesn’t have to live with the trauma. Love and prayers ❤️❤️
And she's so pretty. So traumatic
Deliverance from the trauma planted in his limbic system is so very crucial.
@@jeemmachrimiss6251 ua-cam.com/video/RZZKI2fJx58/v-deo.html
Rip Mz
I commend the man who turned in his brother but he needs the support of friends and the community. I hope his family will see the light and be reunited. It's painful what happened to all the victims we need to change this blood letting is horrible
The perverse thing is that they will ask he apologizes and make amends for turning in his murderer of a brother. This is how you make sure people keep hiding monsters amongst ourselves.
Love from Bulgaria for all the women and children of Kenya. Much prayers God bless X
Someday we will win this battle of GBV....
Thank you Peter for being an example to men all over the world...not just in Kenya alone.
Congratulation Peter with what you're doing the world is watching you and you're a Hero. Yes, women and innocent children are facing physical violence, sexual abuse, torture, etc. You're a mouth to those who are mouth less innocent victims, please I encourage you to continue to assist them and to guide them to get their justice. God bless you.
Peter, you did the right thing! Usitishwe, baba yako yuko Mbinguni
The cycle must stop in the home, from dismantling the toxic masculinity that places a weight on men to act a certain way to fit in with their peers, to giving women a voice that has power towards law enforcement. Thank goodness for the wonderful woman helping but she needs help! What a difficult thing to see
This is it. You are right. This protracted uprise of toxic masculinity will (if it hasn't already) cause a rampant spread of GBV. Women will be reduced to inanimate objects, and in response, men will be reduced to inanimate wallets. And it's a slippery slope from there. I hope more of us are able to join in and help out
I have never understood justification of violence as a sign of seeking respect.
The men laughing at the idea of it all sicken me🤮, the same men bringing up young boys and expects them to be anything different, as a society we really do have a long way to go.
Big love going to the men who live to expose, protect and even end this insane madness! Wishes and prayers of healing, health, hope and change to to the people of Motherland Africa! I love you and have been asking God to take the evil from your homeland and finally allow for the beautiful, kind, loving, strong people of Africa to experience peace,joy and comfort! I ask myself how, why? I am so troubled by the unspeakable truths of African reality! In this year of 2022 how and why has the government not haulted these dark and viscous habits? I do believe that once again, we should mainly judge and hold the government officials responsible for yet another unaddressed situation which should have long been irradicated!
Thank you to the fine and brave men and women who work to expose and end this nightmare that causes so very much agony to so many families there! All true heroes 🙏🏽🙏🏽🤝🏽💜
Domestic violence is a crime!! It's a shame seeing men celebrating beating/abusing their women. It's a big shame for parents to discourage their daughters from going back home from an abusive relationship/ marriage. This society would be a better place with people like Njeri and Peter.
First things first Respect is earned........ I have cried for the lady that lost her child 😭😭😭😭
My heart goes out to Mary and her young son. We are still a long way away from where we want to be Africa but every step takes us closer. Thank you Africa eye for empowering Africans to tell their Story. Bravo to the reporter.
This is beyond sickening! I couldn’t imagine anyone harming my daughter! I’d rather her be alone than deal with this atrocity!! So glad my husband is gentle and loving. My heart goes out to anyone dealing or has dealt with domestic violence.
This was long overdue! I love what USIKIMYE organization are doing. I love this documentary. Violence against women and children is a violation of human rights. The problem is more prevalent in the grassroots. There needs to be an immediate culture shift in the place and worth of a woman in this country. Thanks BBC for covering this
Its painful to see the tears of a single mother. Such" DEVILS"that harras their partners in marriage,may they rot in prison. Justice should be served
Kenyan men we need to be better than this, this is pathetic behaviour that needs to stop immediately.
Yes they are really pathetic asf!
Not all of them some are good
This is so sad, people shouldn't go through this in their lives. Kenya is a long way away to solving this menace. But we will uproot this evil at all cost
It’s so disheartening for a this little boy to witnessed a horrible crime against his mother and sister.
Any African man who thinks hitting a woman means demanding respect they are ignorant and abusive to their partner.
I was raised by my grandma growing up in Africa, I never saw my grandma hits or curse anyone til she died, i grow up in a drug , alcohol and violence neighborhood.
The first 5 years of any child life is the most important part of their future.
This is so heartbreaking, Mary should know that she's a strong woman, may God heal her heart. Big ups to the man's brother, he's a true hero
The Peter's, Njeris are literally some of the angels walking on earth. So much more is needed to be done to sensitise on the injustice and deep trauma caused by gbv. My prayers goes to victims of gender based violence and for those who only memories remain.
Peter is so lovely ❤
@@Bambotb a selfless person
One can see the helplessness in Jerry’s eyes. I pray the public will support her organisation with money, items and all forms of help. Jerry needs help. Even emotional support because of all She has seen and heard with the victims she helps. Less talk, more action.
It's Njeri 😊
Gender based violence is also a big problem in SA. It's really hard to be a woman in this world. This is so sad💔
Exactly so sad
Peter is amazing. How can we support him to encourage him and to grow his business.
My heart goes out to the woman (survivors) of DV ! I am also a survivor and my hearts is torn as I watch this ! I’m asking is the a way I can help the women who lost her daughter and is taking care of her son alone ? I want to help her some how please reach out to me !
My own threatned to kill me severally and i ran for my life with my 2 small kids .Its been 2 years and God has been soo faithful, i treasure the peace of mind i have and i vowed to myself to never ever let any man disrespect me. I personally feel for the "wife of the man encouraging other men to beat their wives". May God set all the women and men free from their abusive spouses. God protect our kids too from these hyenas roaming around
Really touched. What a call to action! More needs to be done, perpetrators need to be held accountable.
Eye-opening and touching documentary. I am from the Caribbean so I see myself as an African descendent and it pains me to see my people living like this because i know we can do better.
This is a problem in all black communities around the world sister. Whether its in US, EU, Caribbean or Africa...everywhere in the world black women are subjected to black men violence....
When is it going to stop? Unless we divest from these communities we will always suffer...
@@paulinapaulina5855 As an Kenyan woman I 100% agree. Black women being abused is too normalised in black communities worldwide.
I’m glad a lot of us black women are waking up. We know we deserve better❤️
You indeed are an African descendant💖 you're a child of the soil
@@paulinapaulina5855 black culture is bad and toxic
Why is it eye-opening, we all know what it's like, even in the Caribbean, it's usually not this bad, with the machetes, but this is not surprising to me. This is why I roll my eyes, when people mention the motherland. I would never feel safe.
That brother was a heaven-sent!! such an honorable act that he did!!! If for no one else for THE CHILD!!
I want to hug Mary. I can't even imagine what the poor boy saw. He's so young and already traumatized and trying to protect mom.
To the woman helping those abused women thank u🙏🏽💪🏽
Peter you deserve an award. People need to watch this 👏👏👏👏
This is a powerful story, its truly disappointing what happens in our Africa and to see that this channel only has 840 000 subscribers and yet we have millions of people in Africa able to afford a phone, as a African we need to know African issues, for my people are destroyed for lack of knowledge rather than blaming Western countries though many problems in our continent derives from western countries so we should watch such news comment and share then comes the action to help our self selves as Africans.
would u please shout a little bit more so that they can hear
that was a tough watch , well done to Peter ..i truly hope those women get the justice they deserve
You can see Peter’s soul thru his eyes. It is a beautiful soul and I pray for his protection, prosperity and long life.
"In African Culture, wife beating is like an initiation ceremony"....really? In this day and age there are people with such backward and primitive thinking? This is wrong and should not be condoned...kudos Tom for this great piece. I pray that the young boy and his mom will be able to heal and may the brother who turned his brother in be blessed.
It is scary to see that we share a country with people with such reasoning. Such a shame.
This “primitive” thinking is dominant on the planet, it is the opposite that is new. In the IS, a black woman is killed every 6 hours by an intimate partner. The idea that woman are property is well established still in some mind.
I don't know why a so-called adult man would stand up and spew such nonsense..in public! Discipline my ass! Just call it what it is..violence!
Koran 4:34
Stay away from them.protect yourself.
I laud you on this expose. As African men, we have been misguidedly cultured to suppress women so as to 'run' our homes. It is in our circumcision songs, it is in how the older men in our lives model their manliness in our impressionable young presence. I doubt there is any African man who didn't harbor some form of aggressive tendency and often against a woman. Men need to get to a forum to dissuade one another from the perception that women 'must' be under their absolute control, and that women deserve a chance to find their potential in society. However we cannot lump up murderers and abusers with all forms of domestic violence and succeed in curbing the crimes in domestic violence.
My heartbeat increasing in tempo and noted myself holding my breath this entire time watching this.... oh God deliver our country!!!
The poor kid is traumatized at such a tender age. It's heartbreaking 💔
I’m a survivor of Domestic violence and Domestic abuse it still haunts me till this day I’m frightened of Men and relationships
I know of two cases in Kenya where men killed their wives then they run to the police station to surrender and shortly after they walked free. The first case took place in Nakuru region where a man killed his wife using an iron rod. After surrendering he was arrested briefly n a few months later he was seen in the village going about his business as if he had done nothing major. The second case happed in Njoro. I watched the story on UA-cam where the sister of the girl who was killed by her boyfriend was narrating the story to an interviewer. She said after surrendering, the perpetrator was released just a few days later n his family was telling her she needs to go to their home so they can conduct a cleansing ceremony on their son. The audacity of it just shocked me. This family was not even remorseful for what their son had done. I dont know how surrendering yourself after committing a murder signifies innocence in Kenya.
In fact the reason why most surrender themselves to the police is because they fear they will be killed by the community. It has got nothing to do with admitting to the crime but saving themselves from mob justice. Ni the same na vile when a driver runs over someone they abandon their cars and run to the police station, its a safety mechanism to avoid being killed by the crowd via mob justice.
Peter is a hero.... he will have eternal joy for this bold act
Kenya government should now start recogning people who have committed such good Acts.salute you peter
Am really sorry for what happened to you it’s incredible how much you have done for your kids l🎉🎉🎉❤❤❤❤
🎉the interviewer is Soo kind and connects/feels the victims in a deeper way....