Summarizing in text for myself, posting in case others want it. *1.* *Patience.* It's a long process, deeply rooted issue. *Notice* the spiral of impatience with impatience, frustration with frustration, etc. *2.* *Put yourself in the shoes of Frustration/Impatiance when they appear.* Understand their perspective, the mechanism underneath. Ask yourself how you're looking at the experience that brings them up. 2a. *Frustration:* "Things aren't happening the way I think they should be." 'Shoulding' all over yourself. Things *already are* if you observed them, it's an unwinnable game. The mind trying to change the past instead of accept it and work with it. It's never worked. 2b. *Impatience:* "I'm imagining the future and I think it should be happening now." Why? Has it ever worked? We think it causes planning, but it doesn't. (Causes fantasy and distraction instead?) *3.* *Be willing to feel uncomfortable.* The distractions are to avoid the discomfort. Feel it, even for just a bit at first. Sit with it. Practice it. The body-mind will learn through direct experience - when it expects impossible things, discomfort arises, and distraction follows. A cycle that perpetuates itself (without awareness and non-reaction) *4.* *Be more open and attentive throughout the day, looking for moments of Frustration / Impatience.* Have to fully identify them in thoughts and in sensations (2&3) first, to catch more moments of them. Can be over time or as a challenge for a specific day. *Stay alert, observant. Catch more subtle opportunities to practice!* Follow the steps when you do. *5.* *Inquire!*, ask yourself questions (Once used to the process of 1-4): 5a. *"What is the cost to me, when I believe that things could be other than they are in this moment?"* What do I lose by believing the story / world-view of Frustration/Impatience (when I don't fully recognize I'm feeling them)? Do I ever win? Or does it just make me feel bad and leads to distraction / habits? Lets that world-view control me? 5b. When used to Step 3, and presently sitting in the space of Discomfort/Restlessness - *"Is there anything that compels me to react? To have to do something? Or can I just stay here?"* Do I have to think about something else, distract myself? Do I have to come up with a solution? Or can I just stay here? Look around in the sensations, where I feel it in the body. Look for *"anything that takes me to the next step of this reaction process"*. IS there anything that moves me along? 5c. During discomfort - *"Where am I feeling the sensations associated with this situation in my body?"* *Scan the body*, feel anywhere that you feel sensations. Check every body-part, every sensation, even body-parts that seemingly have nothing at first. *Attune yourself to sensations in the body, with no goal, no conclusion. Just coming in contact* with them, get as close as you can until you are inside it, until you ARE it. Even as the sensations move or change.
This is great! Not sure if this is good or not, but with emotions like frustration, I tend to soften the landing with something like "Where is all the frustration I've felt before?" The failure to connect to past frustration seems to clear space. With impatience it is like a dance between recognizing "everything now is done" and "there is no complete". Hard to put that one into words really.
This dropped just as I was mentally berating the driver of the bus I was on, because he wasn’t going quickly enough. There seems to be a lot of anger hiding in frustration and impatience. I have work to do. Thanks, Angelo.
I have been noticing all these *new* emotions of frustration lately. I didn’t know why all of these feelings were coming up… Then I realized I was just seeing what had been there the whole time. Exactly like this timely video pointed out 😮😅
I’ve had this same line of thought when it comes to people imbibing cannabis… that more than people becoming super self-conscious, paranoid, etc… that it provides a magnifying glass or horse-blinders or however the focus gets heightened upon such… In other words you can never entirely blame a drug or another person or anything because it’s always the soup of all conditions at play ~ Lila of Totality 🌈💗
Your experiential pointings came at the perfect time when I was fully engaged in my sound and fury of impatience dealing with the insurance company. I think fear is beneath my reactivity--fear that I will have to continue to waste the precious seconds of my life dealing with this crap (my world view). The way out of this reactivity are your beautiful experiential process pointings. These are the nuts and bolts you are so generously gifting us. THANK YOU❤
Brilliant lesson Angelo. It comes to me in the perfect moment for I am experiencing a bit of frustration and impatience. I am immensely grateful I came across your work, your book (which I'm about to finish), your channel. Your words, either written or spoken have always a profound effect on the way I see myself and the way I see reality. You resonate. Thank you, from the bottom of my heart! Warm greetings!! 🙏🏻
I need to watch this video over and over again! For some reason, the past several months I have been more frustrated and impatient over minor things. Thanks for addressing this issue!
Great tips! I’m working on reactivities. Notice they show up in many different forms. A lot of them tied to condition of the mind, beliefs, habits. It takes determination and work to uproot them. The suggested questions to ask oneself already cleared at least half of my problem. Thank you 🙏
I do many times this method, when I feel the contraction and uncomfortable emotions and feelings. Sometimes the energy expands, sometimes it takes even an hour to move through, sometimes it stucks and don't move at all. 🤣😅 And yes, it takes precise presence to be online when the identification appears and to not distract myself. Now its a lot more easier because each emotion has a specific sound and frequency, or octaves, and it can rapidly be detected. Thank you so much dear, it was very very helpful. 🙏🤗💕💞
I love this....albeit I'd add for sensations that are in fact too intense to be with even for 5 seconds..where absolutely no safety is present to feel, repeatedly....or you cant help but react, that's ok. These are some options. 1. Find help from someone safe who will be there for you in this process...professional or personal. 2. Cultivate just whole states as a means of being more resourced to try this again. 3.Feel AROUND the sensation 4. Relax judgements if you can about being unable to be with it. This IS hard. Acknowledge that. I found these helpful for myself and patients as an adjucts to what could be loosely put under mindfulness, when it's just too much. Cuz sometimes for now, it is. It just is. Acknowledge that truth
Well, this is incredibly synchronistic. Just what Ive been struggling with and today in fact, looking for answers as to how to stop this pattern, where i have models and expectations of how I think things or ppl *Should* be. Intellectually I know that is what is causing my suffering showing up as frustration, disappointment, and pain. Ram Dass taught me that. And it seems you have now taught me how to DEAL with those subsequent feelings. With gratitude, I Thank you. 🙇♂️
Absolutely brilliant and so deeply welcome. Thankyou Angelo, I’ve struggled with both for years and for you to provide such a clear process is so incredibly helpful. I recognise it will take time but it’s worth the commitment and for that I’m grateful. Love your channel, so accessible and making the profound simple, wisdom indeed.
My Mother was a trigger for me I would become impatient with her, She knew how to push my buttons..So I realised she should be my teacher...I welcomed the impatience and frustrations
I have been told to accept the moment and go through the sensations for decades but not to look at how to have a worldview that allows it nor to examine the effectiveness of being frustrated. I couldn’t access that during 23 years of teaching; I never did accept the reality of my failure to reach so many students. Now able to work through the process. I have been aware for years that I am very easily irritated just about all day long because there seem to be so many standards that the world is not meeting.😆
It’s hardest to do when the impatience and frustration with myself. Then I have to give this body mind a break. The SELF may be unlimited, but there is a belief this body mind isn’t.
You made me laugh when you said the first step to overcoming impatience is to be patient... Ha ha ha 😅 Very good tips, thank you. I resonate with this. 🙏 I already practice being present to the feelings in my body, it's what Jean Klein and Eric Baret teach, if you happen to know them. It's very effective as we can't think and feel at the same time so the story in our head stops immediately. Eckhart Tolle spoke about this too. And you are right, the process takes time, I still feel the whole thing is taking way too long and I'm feeling frustration !! 😅
I’m a bit surprised at how many places in the body I can sense ripples of frustration. I would’ve expected it to be more focal to one or a couple of spaces. 😳
Does F/I point to our demand to be happy and maintain ourselves ? Is there nothing inherently wrong at the moment F/I occur? If so can’t we just drop the whole charade.? Perhaps we need more convincing
Are you frustrated when you talk, angelo? Why do you talk so fast?. I, personally, would appreciate more slowness and an appreciation iof the words you say. Too many words can stop the flow of feeling and a dropping into feeling. A little too cerebral cortex and a series of instructions.
It’s just the way it is with artistic expression. I get people saying I talk too slowly, too fast, don’t like the music, do like the music, don’t like the backgrounds, do like the backgrounds lol. Basically if you are gonna produce art or express yourself publicly you have to accept that people love giving you their opinions. At this point I just enjoy making it and don’t worry too much about the opinions of others. Sone will like it others won’t etc etc. If there are technical glitches or actionable ideas about how to improve the process or content it’s always good to hear tho so I do pay attention to feedback.
Summarizing in text for myself, posting in case others want it.
*1.* *Patience.*
It's a long process, deeply rooted issue. *Notice* the spiral of impatience with impatience, frustration with frustration, etc.
*2.* *Put yourself in the shoes of Frustration/Impatiance when they appear.*
Understand their perspective, the mechanism underneath. Ask yourself how you're looking at the experience that brings them up.
2a. *Frustration:* "Things aren't happening the way I think they should be."
'Shoulding' all over yourself. Things *already are* if you observed them, it's an unwinnable game. The mind trying to change the past instead of accept it and work with it. It's never worked.
2b. *Impatience:* "I'm imagining the future and I think it should be happening now."
Why? Has it ever worked? We think it causes planning, but it doesn't. (Causes fantasy and distraction instead?)
*3.* *Be willing to feel uncomfortable.*
The distractions are to avoid the discomfort. Feel it, even for just a bit at first. Sit with it. Practice it.
The body-mind will learn through direct experience - when it expects impossible things, discomfort arises, and distraction follows. A cycle that perpetuates itself (without awareness and non-reaction)
*4.* *Be more open and attentive throughout the day, looking for moments of Frustration / Impatience.*
Have to fully identify them in thoughts and in sensations (2&3) first, to catch more moments of them. Can be over time or as a challenge for a specific day.
*Stay alert, observant. Catch more subtle opportunities to practice!* Follow the steps when you do.
*5.* *Inquire!*, ask yourself questions (Once used to the process of 1-4):
5a. *"What is the cost to me, when I believe that things could be other than they are in this moment?"*
What do I lose by believing the story / world-view of Frustration/Impatience (when I don't fully recognize I'm feeling them)?
Do I ever win? Or does it just make me feel bad and leads to distraction / habits? Lets that world-view control me?
5b. When used to Step 3, and presently sitting in the space of Discomfort/Restlessness -
*"Is there anything that compels me to react? To have to do something? Or can I just stay here?"*
Do I have to think about something else, distract myself? Do I have to come up with a solution?
Or can I just stay here?
Look around in the sensations, where I feel it in the body.
Look for *"anything that takes me to the next step of this reaction process"*. IS there anything that moves me along?
5c. During discomfort - *"Where am I feeling the sensations associated with this situation in my body?"*
*Scan the body*, feel anywhere that you feel sensations. Check every body-part, every sensation, even body-parts that seemingly have nothing at first.
*Attune yourself to sensations in the body, with no goal, no conclusion. Just coming in contact* with them, get as close as you can until you are inside it, until you ARE it. Even as the sensations move or change.
When i started watching your video i hated these backgrounds but idk why i love them now .
Thanks 🙏
😂😍
Thank God that UA-cam recommended me this video when i was so frustrated
This is great! Not sure if this is good or not, but with emotions like frustration, I tend to soften the landing with something like "Where is all the frustration I've felt before?" The failure to connect to past frustration seems to clear space. With impatience it is like a dance between recognizing "everything now is done" and "there is no complete". Hard to put that one into words really.
Man, this was like a therapy session only a lot better. Priceless.
This dropped just as I was mentally berating the driver of the bus I was on, because he wasn’t going quickly enough. There seems to be a lot of anger hiding in frustration and impatience. I have work to do. Thanks, Angelo.
Thank you Angelo
I have been noticing all these *new* emotions of frustration lately. I didn’t know why all of these feelings were coming up… Then I realized I was just seeing what had been there the whole time. Exactly like this timely video pointed out
😮😅
Yes!!
I’ve had this same line of thought when it comes to people imbibing cannabis… that more than people becoming super self-conscious, paranoid, etc… that it provides a magnifying glass or horse-blinders or however the focus gets heightened upon such…
In other words you can never entirely blame a drug or another person or anything because it’s always the soup of all conditions at play ~ Lila of Totality 🌈💗
Your experiential pointings came at the perfect time when I was fully engaged in my sound and fury of impatience dealing with the insurance company. I think fear is beneath my reactivity--fear that I will have to continue to waste the precious seconds of my life dealing with this crap (my world view). The way out of this reactivity are your beautiful experiential process pointings. These are the nuts and bolts you are so generously gifting us.
THANK YOU❤
Master once said to me, "Do the opposite of whatever I tell you." So I didn't.
Lol
🤣😅🤣😅
Haha ! That was a good test ! 👌
Thankkyou so much, Angelo, very helpful, ❤️
Brilliant lesson Angelo. It comes to me in the perfect moment for I am experiencing a bit of frustration and impatience. I am immensely grateful I came across your work, your book (which I'm about to finish), your channel. Your words, either written or spoken have always a profound effect on the way I see myself and the way I see reality. You resonate. Thank you, from the bottom of my heart! Warm greetings!! 🙏🏻
Wonderful!
I need to watch this video over and over again! For some reason, the past several months I have been more frustrated and impatient over minor things. Thanks for addressing this issue!
YES, brilliant! These pointers are MOST helpful! For deeper realization of acceptance, for self-inquiry. THANK YOU!
You're so welcome!
Thank you.
Welcome!
Thanks to you and all for taking time to point us to this looking.
Great tips! I’m working on reactivities. Notice they show up in many different forms. A lot of them tied to condition of the mind, beliefs, habits. It takes determination and work to uproot them. The suggested questions to ask oneself already cleared at least half of my problem. Thank you 🙏
I do many times this method, when I feel the contraction and uncomfortable emotions and feelings. Sometimes the energy expands, sometimes it takes even an hour to move through, sometimes it stucks and don't move at all. 🤣😅 And yes, it takes precise presence to be online when the identification appears and to not distract myself. Now its a lot more easier because each emotion has a specific sound and frequency, or octaves, and it can rapidly be detected. Thank you so much dear, it was very very helpful. 🙏🤗💕💞
I love this....albeit I'd add for sensations that are in fact too intense to be with even for 5 seconds..where absolutely no safety is present to feel, repeatedly....or you cant help but react, that's ok.
These are some options.
1. Find help from someone safe who will be there for you in this process...professional or personal.
2. Cultivate just whole states as a means of being more resourced to try this again.
3.Feel AROUND the sensation
4. Relax judgements if you can about being unable to be with it. This IS hard. Acknowledge that.
I found these helpful for myself and patients as an adjucts to what could be loosely put under mindfulness, when it's just too much. Cuz sometimes for now, it is. It just is. Acknowledge that truth
Well, this is incredibly synchronistic. Just what Ive been struggling with and today in fact, looking for answers as to how to stop this pattern, where i have models and expectations of how I think things or ppl *Should* be. Intellectually I know that is what is causing my suffering showing up as frustration, disappointment, and pain. Ram Dass taught me that. And it seems you have now taught me how to DEAL with those subsequent feelings.
With gratitude, I Thank you. 🙇♂️
You're Welcome
So much gratitude for these generous offerings, Angelo. Deep bow.
Thank you for your pointing it helps all of us
Absolutely brilliant and so deeply welcome. Thankyou Angelo, I’ve struggled with both for years and for you to provide such a clear process is so incredibly helpful. I recognise it will take time but it’s worth the commitment and for that I’m grateful. Love your channel, so accessible and making the profound simple, wisdom indeed.
You're very welcome
Question number four....what is impatience and frustation...who owns it?
Thank you for this, just what I need right now ❤
Thank you ❣️
Welcome
I'm enjoying your channel! I bought your book today and I'm also enjoying that.
Hope you enjoy it!
Simple and awake.
❤
My Mother was a trigger for me I would become impatient with her, She knew how to push my buttons..So I realised she should be my teacher...I welcomed the impatience and frustrations
Awesome
I have been told to accept the moment and go through the sensations for decades but not to look at how to have a worldview that allows it nor to examine the effectiveness of being frustrated. I couldn’t access that during 23 years of teaching; I never did accept the reality of my failure to reach so many students. Now able to work through the process. I have been aware for years that I am very easily irritated just about all day long because there seem to be so many standards that the world is not meeting.😆
It’s hardest to do when the impatience and frustration with myself. Then I have to give this body mind a break. The SELF may be unlimited, but there is a belief this body mind isn’t.
You made me laugh when you said the first step to overcoming impatience is to be patient... Ha ha ha 😅
Very good tips, thank you. I resonate with this. 🙏
I already practice being present to the feelings in my body, it's what Jean Klein and Eric Baret teach, if you happen to know them. It's very effective as we can't think and feel at the same time so the story in our head stops immediately. Eckhart Tolle spoke about this too.
And you are right, the process takes time, I still feel the whole thing is taking way too long and I'm feeling frustration !! 😅
How to overcome impatience:
Step 1: Be patient.
;-)
If only it were that easy eh?
I’m a bit surprised at how many places in the body I can sense ripples of frustration. I would’ve expected it to be more focal to one or a couple of spaces. 😳
Nice exploration
Does F/I point to our demand to be happy and maintain ourselves ? Is there nothing inherently wrong at the moment F/I occur? If so can’t we just drop the whole charade.? Perhaps we need more convincing
🙏♥️♥️♥️
Not only am I should-ing all over myself, but I'm should-ing all over my loved ones!
Are you frustrated when you talk, angelo? Why do you talk so fast?. I, personally, would appreciate more slowness and an appreciation iof the words you say. Too many words can stop the flow of feeling and a dropping into feeling. A little too cerebral cortex and a series of instructions.
It’s just the way it is with artistic expression. I get people saying I talk too slowly, too fast, don’t like the music, do like the music, don’t like the backgrounds, do like the backgrounds lol. Basically if you are gonna produce art or express yourself publicly you have to accept that people love giving you their opinions. At this point I just enjoy making it and don’t worry too much about the opinions of others. Sone will like it others won’t etc etc. If there are technical glitches or actionable ideas about how to improve the process or content it’s always good to hear tho so I do pay attention to feedback.