Get Rid of Self-Limiting Beliefs 27/30 How to Process Emotions
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- Опубліковано 22 вер 2021
- Get the course: How to Process Your Emotions
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In this video you’re going to learn how to let go of self-limiting beliefs, how to stop labeling yourself, how to stop getting stuck hating yourself, and how to find a healthy sense of self.
The labels you give yourself, whether you call yourself broken, stupid, bad, or even if you give yourself positive labels, these are just like painted-on cattle guards: they are self-imposed limits. And today, I’m going to teach you one way to let go of them.
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Therapy in a Nutshell and the information provided by Emma McAdam are solely intended for informational and entertainment purposes and are not a substitute for advice, diagnosis, or treatment regarding medical or mental health conditions. Although Emma McAdam is a licensed marriage and family therapist, the views expressed on this site or any related content should not be taken for medical or psychiatric advice. Always consult your physician before making any decisions related to your physical or mental health.
In therapy I use a combination of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, Systems Theory, positive psychology, and a bio-psycho-social approach to treating mental illness and other challenges we all face in life. The ideas from my videos are frequently adapted from multiple sources. Many of them come from Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, especially the work of Steven Hayes, Jason Luoma, and Russ Harris. The sections on stress and the mind-body connection derive from the work of Stephen Porges (the Polyvagal theory), Peter Levine (Somatic Experiencing) Francine Shapiro (EMDR), and Bessel Van Der Kolk. I also rely heavily on the work of the Arbinger institute for my overall understanding of our ability to choose our life's direction.
And deeper than all of that, the Gospel of Jesus Christ orients my personal worldview and sense of security, peace, hope, and love www.churchofjesuschrist.org/c...
If you are in crisis, please contact the National Suicide Prevention Hotline at suicidepreventionlifeline.org/ or 1-800-273-TALK (8255) or your local emergency services.
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I feel like listening to you for 15 minutes is more helpful than speaking about my problems for an hour with a therapist. Thank you so much for being a positive instrument of God.
Can totally agree! Her advice is better than that of my therapists
She's a great teacher.
She’s a therapist,lol
@@kingd4500 yes, she is, but in this role she is teaching, not doing therapy. People can be more than one thing.
@@christinechapman9764 You are right about multiple roles, which was my point. Being a teacher is an important aspect of being a therapist, just as being an advocate for clients or being a holder of a safe space. A therapist being a mental health professional should be educating clients on mental health to help them understand their own mental health in a way that helps them think and behave in new ways that promote healing and a desired way of experiencing life. My point of pointing out that she is a therapist was to highlight that therapists educate clients the same way she is educating people in this video and that the lack of this type of experience in therapy has more to do with the actual individual therapists (not the right match) and not therapists in general.
1.Notice how you label yourself write them down.
2.Try to step back from them. Practice watching thoughts.
3.Explore these labels
-ask yourself Which one of these are helpful or which one of these beliefs getting away of change or grawth.
-hilght the labels that serve as an excuses for you.
4.Consider changing these labels by positive mindset.
5.Get a perspective of a therapist or a safe friend.
6.Let go of false sources of self- worth like perfectionsim, approval, comparison...
7.spend less time obsessing about your identity and your ego and more energy focusing on your values.
Thank you ❤️
Despite its biological consequences sibling marriages still take place in certain parts of the world. Spread this video to stop it ua-cam.com/video/v2wDriJxAxY/v-deo.html
Thanks for the summary. 😊
Emma, thank you for this relevant and timely content!
Thank you!!
I wanted to add that on my kindergarten report card the teacher wrote in a note to my parents, "Ginene is very anxious for such a young child." I'm 70 years old now and instead of saying that I'm experiencing anxiety, I've been telling myself that I am an anxious and depressed person my whole life. Wow!
She is strangely, spookily wise for such a very young person.
I'm teaching a friend of mine Irish, and something you said reminded me of what I'm going to teach her next week.
In English, we describe feelings and emotions as things that we are; for instance, "I am happy", "I am hungry", "I am worried", etc. But in Irish it's phrased a little differently: "Tá áthas orm" literally means "Happiness is on me." "Tá ocras orm": "Hunger is on me." "Tá imní orm." "Worry is on me." and so on and so forth. These feelings and emotions don't make up the entirety of who we are, as the English language implies; they're just things that we experience for a time, that come and go like leaves or snowflakes falling on our head, as Irish more accurately gets at. (Not a criticism of the English language btw - I just love the little differences between languages that make life more interesting!)
Your video was a really good reminder that we don't have to believe the stories that we tell ourselves, and that even if we do have some very real limitations with our circumstances or state of health for example, we can still choose to focus on what we can control and on what we're grateful for. Thanks a million for this series, or as we say in Irish, go raibh míle maith agat! :)
Yes! Same with spanish, how we use our words impacts how we think and feel, great example!
Same in Hindi as well ❤️
I love this! Going to try to remember this and redirect my thinking.
Beautiful sentiment. Preserve the Irish language
Same in French, the auxiliary verb is often “to have,” rather than “to be.” You would say I have hunger, rather than I am hunger (that would mean you’re the literal embodiment of Hunger itself😂)
I wonder how many of these comments you read?
Anyways, I wanted to thank you. I had my life changed by therapy back in 2019. I was having a difficult time with friends, family, and feeling like a failure, but managed to grow past everything and develop this sense of peace. Last year, that sense of peace ended up slipping away from me and I ended up struggling, once again, with friends, family, and feeling like a disaster. I was put on a waitlist for therapy, but I'd have to wait months and I was in crisis mode. I am so, so grateful that this playlist is here. Your advice and guidance allowed me to rebuild who I am and set me back on course to who I want to be. I've been recommending it to people in similar straights as I was in.
It's also small, but I find it interesting when you bring up your relationship to your religion. Each time God comes up, I feel my own hackles raise because I'm so used to people trying to take every opportunity to proselytize. I was raised evangelical, but turned out queer and atheist, so you can imagine where that stress comes from. While I don't imagine that I'll be able to let my guard entirely down, I do appreciate how your beliefs come across as both incidental and sincere. It's pleasant to be exposed to someone who lives by kindness when all my life I was exposed to faith being a weapon. Thanks again for everything. I do hope your God blesses you. :)
What you said about her beliefs come across as both incidental and sincere brought to mind a metaphor I incorporated in my thinking some 20+ years ago: "Silent rivers run deep." People who have absorbed their religion and are at one with it tend not to trumpet their religious beliefs, instead making only occasional reference to it. Likewise, rivers that have been around for extended periods of time usually manage to carve deep into the landscape they flow in, creating depth to their existence and minimizing the sound their water makes as they gingerly meander along. Younger, less established rivers are far more limited when it comes to the space the volume of water is given to flow through, usually generating more sound as it scurries over rocks and ground that may be but mere feet or inches below the surface.
This is so beautiful, I must confess ve just spoken direct to me I need to pick myself up and start doing the right thing. Many thanks Ms Emma Lots of love from Uganda.
This helps with illnesses too. "I have trouble with xx...but i am not the illness."
I don’t need personal therapy because this channel exists ❤
I love that your a spiritual person. I have not found many doctors that are in my area. Your a jewel. Thank you. You have helped me so much.
Been labeling myself saying "I'm a failure" "I'm stupid" "I'm an idiot" "I'm a bad mum" This has opened my eyes. I'm definitely keeping a check on it now
Emma...I stumbled upon your videos and I can't thank you enough. So many of these skills are exactly what I've been needing. I especially love that you are a Christian. How cool is it that God's word authored so many, if not all of these skills you teach. He knew what we would need! And he raised up people such as yourself to present the concepts in a clear, methodical fashion. Thank you for what you do. You are making a difference! 😊☝️💛
Not me having to check the title of the video again after you jumped straight into talking about cattle guards and agriculture 🤣🤣
For real though, these videos have actually been a godsend during the pandemic and have been helping me so much as someone who can’t afford therapy rn and is living in lock down. I’m taking notes during every video like a good little student 😅 Thanks for making these lessons freely available and always taking the time to explain topics in depth. It’s been helping me more than you’ll ever know and I suspect it’s the same for a lot of other people watching too. You’re a gem!
Love it - same experience
Okay, bawling my head off. Asking my Higher Power how do you see me? I was overwhelmed with such a strong sense of love, I almost couldn’t bear it. ❤🎉
Emma, thanks for sharing this message of HOPE and not allowing us to wallow in our broken past. I am a new creation!
So from now on we regard no one from a worldly point of view. Though we once regarded Christ in this way, we do so no longer. Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here! All this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation: that God was reconciling the world to himself in Christ, not counting people’s sins against them. And he has committed to us the message of reconciliation.
2 Corinthians 5:16-19
Woah, that feeling of predestination is something that rules my life, I'd never seen anyone articulate it so eloquently and I didn't even realise it was a common experience🤯
This is so powerful and eye opening thank you very much for this!
I like to use the shirt metaphor when I start judging myself as well as others. I ask myself: am I this shirt? Obviously no bc I can change my shirt if I feel like it- it's totally my choice. I can wear a red shirt, blue, etc. Thoughts work the same way. When we identify with our thoughts, it's like identifying with our shirt- it doesn't define us and we can change it if we so choose to.
To change our reality, we must see that the judgements we place upon ourselves are the same judgements we place on others, and vice versa. Life is a mirror. When we treat ourselves with unconditional love, we do so to others as well. However, never pressure yourself to be more loving, for that too is a form of judgement. Rather, write down the consistent beliefs and thoughts you tell yourself and determine how someone else would feel if you told that to them or even someone who is experiencing the same specific challenges as you. Like a passing cloud, thoughts come and go. Just take a deep breath and let them pass. They always do. If you were your thoughts, when they fade, so would you, and yet you remain. You are more powerful than you realize!
this is beautifully written!
This is really eye opening thank you 😄
Whoa! 🔥💪🏾🔥💪🏾
Really good video, I'd give it 5 stars if that were still a thing on UA-cam.
Instead of saying "I am an introvert" I like to take on an observer viewpoint of "I have parts of me that are as a social animal, and enjoy having food, water, and a sense of community"
nice!
That’s awesome.
You are really easy to listen to and I learn so much from your videos.
You do know just by discussing these things and also your anxiousness topics you're not only helping us and my friends( I actually recommend your channel everytime) you're also making other people whos so deep in the "dark" inch by inch understand themselves and even saving a life.
THANK YOU FOR THIS I dont know about the others but I am so thankful your channel exists
Be safe and healthy thank you :*
sending digital hugs and love from Manila
Love your easy to listen to style and amazing content.
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Painted cow cattle guards is about the best analogy I have heard, ever! You are so creative, Emmal - love it. Thank you!
I can’t express how much your channel has helped me.. I have watched your videos when I feel I have nothing left and just want to give up and you always give me good tips and advice. I can’t thank you enough
Emma, thank you, thank God for you...more grace to you & through you🙏
Omg you are like a modern healer.
After this video was over I was able to listen to my thoughts and I recognized I was setting myself up for failure. Wow just wow.
You literally made it so I could let love in and rationalize my thoughts and emotions. You are an angel!
I wish I heard this 20 years ago. Beautiful. Thank you❤
A better help commercial on Facebook had phrase "I have emotions, I am not emotion " and truly seeing myself as observer of my emotions instead of being my emotions was amazing.
Your videos have helped me a lot. Glad to hear you're a child of God!
Thank you Emma.... And for spreading the word of God.
Love from South-Africa
I love her semi-deep voice. It’s beautiful and relaxing.
This is brilliant - it made me cringe just to hear it and accept that I do this all the wrong way around both on the positive side and the negative side - wow, so logical - and the message was delivered so gnetly.
My relationship to my mental health has improved a LOT over the past two years. But as everyone does, I still have my wobbles. I return to this video the most in those moments like revision. It reminds me about how I frame my wobbles to avoid me becoming too cynical about how I'm feeling
The best video on UA-cam about limiting beliefs! 🙏👍👌
Wow, I’ve been watching your videos for awhile and it just never really stuck to me, until this week. I have been dealing with depression for so long.. I got so sick of my life being terrible and I’m trying to get up again and get out of these labels and self limiting beliefs.Thank you for the encouragement and knowledge.
I don't understand all you said but I got this point what you say. I just new learning English skills and I am struggling with the self-limiting belief I hope I can speak English fluently to translate your video into Indonesian languages. anyway, thank Emma your videos give me warmth and gratitude.
You had me at “I am a daughter of God” thank you
I always learn something new here! :-) It hadn't occurred to me that positive labels could also be limiting! Thanks for that :-)
Thank you so much Emma ...I am guilty of labelling myself as an anxious person or an overthinker. Now I can learn to say to myself...sometimes I overthink and sometimes im anxious or sad or lonely.
you-tubers like them deserve so much more subscribers, amazing work keep up
I do the "I'm better than" comparison all the time. I think it originated from me competing constantly in sports when I was young. Only over the past year or so I've started to see it as an unhealthy way of thinking. This video really confirms and accelerates my motivation to change. Thank you
I can’t thank you enough, I was able to separate from my thoughts and see my labels more clearly. I was aware before I am the observer but this time I was aware of my ego as well, telling me it’s not safe explore all the negative things I think about. I was able to control it now by saying “no I choose growth”
What kind of therapist are you? e.g. CBT, psychodynamic, IFS, ACT etc? Your way of explaining emotional issues across all of your videos is the best I’ve seen on UA-cam and clearer than in-person therapy that I’ve engaged in.
Loved this video. I am struggling with beliefs of superiority at work and it's been causing me to experience constant feelings of anger. This helped!
Good on you to have such great insight!
This is better than my 1year therapy
My PHP (virtual) used this amazing video. The quote at the beginning knocked me over! The way you present the material makes it a logical process, and it's so accessable! I can't wait to start watching this whole series. I think I'll even use each video as an art prompt for afterwards! Thank you so much!
That wall exercise is really helpful for me. I think I may have some kind of disassociative disorder. I experienced death in the family when I was a teenager and that caused me to explore spirituality. And I think it led me to disassociate with reality. So I have some issues where I think things are talking to me when they're not talking to me. So like when I look at the wall I have trouble looking directly at it. It feels like I am the wall.
Love your calming voice Emma ❤
You are so kind
THANK YOU FOR WHAT YOU DO!!
Thank you for sharing and teaching. These are things we are working on to build a foundation with our children and by default healing our own disabling beliefs. Growth mindset is such a powerful and Grace filled tool ❤️
lets everyone make her 2m subscriber she is just amazing
This was A VERY helpful segment !!
Thank you for this information and love. God bless you more abundantly in JESUS name. Amen.❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
Such a strong and powerful message. Too often we enter into a vicious cycle of self-limiting belief. Absolutely love your channel! Sending you loads of positive vibes ☮️💟
(insert GIF of my mind being blown) ... BAM!!! 👍
wow this video is extremely profound!! Love it
I have a major decision to make in the very near future. The illustration of the cattle guards brought everything into focus. Will I let my self-limiting beliefs decide for me or will I choose which nature to water? I've been deliberating for days about this decision and in less than five minutes with Emma I know what I need to do and where to place my focus. Thanks Emma.
Emma, your content is superb. I found your videos as companion pieces to the therapy sessions I presently attend. This video in particular cuts extremely close to the bone, as it hits so many points that I saw myself in practically every scenario you discussed. My struggle with finding a healthy sense of self has been lifelong (I'm nearing 50) and, only within the last six months, have I started to realize the damaging behaviors I put myself through and how much I clung to equally damaging labels. THIS video--if I may use slang from today's youth--hits different. Thank you for sharing your gift with us, and in particular thank you for THIS video that I will use on my path to healing.
This video came out at the right time! I was wondering why I don't have a solid identity and keep changing them according to the person that I want to please. It was insightful. I love "I am God's child" identity coz nothing can shake it. Can you make a video on how to have solid faith in God from psychological perspective? My faith in Him keeps fluctuating whenever I face obstacles in life. I want to get close to Him and hold onto him even when I face challenges. By the way I have BPD so that explains my splitting with God Himself! And about smartness as identity, I believe that the definition we give to it matters. To me being smart is being aware that I don't know everything and the willingness to learn. Thank you for your work. It's really helpful to understand myself a little more each day.
Despite its biological consequences sibling marriages still take place in certain parts of the world. Spread this video to stop it ua-cam.com/video/v2wDriJxAxY/v-deo.html
Thank you so much dear therapist, you're so wonderful, I can listen and assimilat your teachings rapidly, I'm so grateful for your great work 🙏💖
I just want to say thank you. I appreciate that you are a member of the church and you aren't afraid to let that come out in your videos. Your topics and messages have been very helpful for me. Have you considered releasing a course with regards to healthy eating? I realize that my eating habits have taken a nose-dive in recent years and when I try to make even the most incremental of positive changes, my brain rejects the thought and I get even worse in my decision making! I'm sure this isn't anything new but would be interested in a course to help me change my thinking.
Amazing course! Thanks so much for sharing your knowledge !
Thank you so much for the beautiful work lots of love and prayers from Egypt
I just want to say tank you ❤ l learn lot's of thing because of you and I try to cure my depression and fight it . I watch your video's and practice to become a good person and creat the happy life !!
Thanks for your video's ❤❤❤❤
Thanks Ghazaleh, keep up the good work! it adds up over time :)
@@TherapyinaNutshell ❤
Needed to hear it today. 💖thank you
She uses the best examples. These really help since I’m a bit of a visual learner. So grateful for these videos ❤️
I am Anusha and I like to learn and grow. I love this sentence.
Thank you so much for this video. it was incredible. i learned so much about myself. that example about thinking your smart really hit home because i often think about myself this way and feel so uncomfortable with being in spaces where i don't feel smart, so often times i'll avoid these spaces all together. this one belief about myself has not been helpful at all. i've missed out on so many opportunities to learn new skills.
I love the advice pointing out our all-or-nothing thinking about the kind of person I am…I am a smart person, I’m a hard worker. I did t think about how even positive labels are limiting. Some of my labels are defensive/protective, I’m not analytical and others are arrogant, I am a risk taker. You’ve given more to explore. Thank you
So so good !
I never thought of it this way, thank you for this!! :)
I needed this.
I really DO APPRECIATE your videos, THANKS FOR ALL THE FREE Therapy ! BE BLESSED!
Love your analogies!
You are wonderful, Emma!
Thank You ❤️😍🥰
Thank you so much! I love your videos!
So glad to have found your wonderful channel.
Thank you for this . .
Will definitely check out others as well, but this certainly resonates with how I may be labelling myself without even being aware that I am. As always, thank you again for being you!
Kind regards to you and yours. Stay well!
Great insights Emma! Thank you!
This was SO helpfull, thanks 💖
Awesome guidance as always.
Thank you so much. This is so helpful. ❤️
This was really helpful! ♥️
Thank-you very much for putting these up on the tube. I've watched a few of them and they are helping me a lot.
I needed this more than anything.
Thank you so much for sharing this.
Grateful 🙏🙏
What I appreciate so much here is the use of such good and relevant examples and stories, thank you so much for your hard work.
You are amazing
This is so powerful thank you!
Thank you for your videos
So important!
Amazing msg to start my new week 💓
Super insightful 👏 😊 Thank you!
Great advice.God bless you to share this.
Ty for putting out these eye-opening videos for free. So helpful and very much appreciated.
Great …. Thank you so much! 🍃❤️🍃
Thank you so much 💫 I appreciate your videos are very helpful ⭐️🤍
I love your stuff , so practical, clear and concise… thank you !!!! You are blessing people
Been waiting for long ! Tysm
Hope you like it!
Thank you so much !Emma.You are definitely one of the best therapist I have know.One big hug
This is helpful and you explained it clearly. Thank you.