Human Ships Encounter the Galactic Empire, and Humans Can't Stop Laughing | Best HFY Stories | HFY

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  • Опубліковано 3 січ 2025

КОМЕНТАРІ • 98

  • @MaxPSVR
    @MaxPSVR Місяць тому +44

    Captain Chaos. That is the perfect name for any cat.

  • @carliegriffiths6290
    @carliegriffiths6290 12 днів тому +2

    May your chaos be organised and your imperfections perfect . What a lovely thing to say ❤

  • @soumikmandal8604
    @soumikmandal8604 Місяць тому +24

    "This is all against imperial Protocols", please continue....

  • @tonyv8925
    @tonyv8925 Місяць тому +36

    Very amusing story, thanks for sharing.

  • @LawrenceKennard
    @LawrenceKennard Місяць тому +19

    Humans conquer the Calvinists!
    The story was perfect

  • @WilliamMccormick-xk5cb
    @WilliamMccormick-xk5cb Місяць тому +27

    I'm sure that this is AI generated, but damn is this a good story! I live it! 10/10!

    • @Axi-Sol
      @Axi-Sol Місяць тому +5

      Maybe edited by an ai but I think there is definitely someone behind this story

  • @mikemesser4326
    @mikemesser4326 Місяць тому +21

    Love the name for the cat...
    And I can empathize with the 30 signatures thing. I worked a job once where one of my duties was to create formulation changes called ECNs (Engineering Change Notice). A chemist would submit the new formula. I would have to calculate cost changes, send the proposal to 4-5 people that eventually increased to multiple passes among 8 or 9 people. Midway I would make the change and resubmit with a printoff of the new formula.
    The reason for the added signatures was a single typo I made in 5 years. I mistyped 118280 a118820. One was the oil; the other was yellow pigment. The idiot mixer in the plant didn't connect the fact that W meant White ... and Y meant yellow. And that the formula was missing its oil .. which every formula had. One type in 5 years and I had everyone yelling at me. Agreed, my fault. But that was the only typo I ever made.
    After they made the changes to the signature list, it started taking 3-4 times as long to get a formula approved.

  • @jonathanjones2835
    @jonathanjones2835 Місяць тому +7

    One of the better syfy stories of late 👍

  • @vromansaltzman5276
    @vromansaltzman5276 Місяць тому +20

    Great story what a great change from the normal SIFI stuff.

  • @nevillehoward8736
    @nevillehoward8736 Місяць тому +16

    Hmm. I expected Lord Perfect to reply that he didn't know how his fleet was propelled. Proudly, at that.

  • @GofuKyersen
    @GofuKyersen Місяць тому +7

    Funny. Enjoyed this

  • @JohnHankins-n6p
    @JohnHankins-n6p Місяць тому +30

    Why did the chicken cross the road.
    "To get away from me.".

    • @mikegremlin5249
      @mikegremlin5249 Місяць тому +2

      To show the possum it could be done.

    • @sampatton146
      @sampatton146 Місяць тому +1

      To get away from Colonel Sanders!

  • @svenguinee1072
    @svenguinee1072 10 днів тому

    This was a great and funny story. I enjoyed it a lot.

  • @Gundamortal
    @Gundamortal Місяць тому +10

    Welcome to the Sheldon Empire.😅

  • @michaeloshaughnessy9718
    @michaeloshaughnessy9718 Місяць тому +10

    I love the inference regarding OCD 😂 this is great stuff! I’m lol

  • @laymelow1979
    @laymelow1979 Місяць тому +7

    This is the best one ever 😂

  • @wadeenyart9676
    @wadeenyart9676 Місяць тому +2

    Please more, i was laughing so hard. we need several chapters on lord perfect!!!!!!

  • @troyvaughan9281
    @troyvaughan9281 Місяць тому +1

    Very well written. Worth it. Thanks. Different and entertaining. 👍

  • @stanleycarrothers9227
    @stanleycarrothers9227 Місяць тому +3

    Great

  • @johnweaver8864
    @johnweaver8864 Місяць тому +5

    interesting

  • @kili1234567
    @kili1234567 Місяць тому +3

    Good one

  • @blueeyeswhitedragon9839
    @blueeyeswhitedragon9839 Місяць тому +2

    Thank you for an entirely entertaining story. Much better than the usual juvenile stuff offered. 👽

  • @creemoon9546
    @creemoon9546 Місяць тому +6

    the AI read of this text is proof that we have a long ways to go lol

    • @Wirmish
      @Wirmish Місяць тому +2

      No. AI is exponential....

    • @jamesogden7756
      @jamesogden7756 3 дні тому

      No capitalization, no punctuation. Right.
      Super neat. Tell me how you DICK-TATED that into your phone a little faster. 🤔🙄🤪

  • @mariuszkruk8667
    @mariuszkruk8667 Місяць тому

    The best story I have ever heard! 😊 Well done I want more, please❤

  • @georgeblair3894
    @georgeblair3894 День тому

    Humans laughing is such a contradictory message to aliens. On the one hand, they appear to be jovial and happy. On the other, they are showing teeth. It's when the humans STOP laughing that folks should worry.

  • @micahlovejoy81
    @micahlovejoy81 Місяць тому

    This was a hilarious HFY . " its vibrating is it going to explode?" I would have responded: "Thats what she said"

  • @VergilTheLegendaryDarkSlayer
    @VergilTheLegendaryDarkSlayer Місяць тому +5

    They should be grateful they didn't encounter the Goa'uld
    The description of the ships decribed the Ha'tak almost to a T

    • @marysmith-ps7uj
      @marysmith-ps7uj 4 дні тому

      So glad someone other than me loves Stargate SG-1. Loved Jack O'Neil!😊😊

    • @VergilTheLegendaryDarkSlayer
      @VergilTheLegendaryDarkSlayer 4 дні тому +1

      @marysmith-ps7uj same, his arguments with Daniel always cracked me up
      You just said Kroovas
      No I didn't
      Yes you did
      ..... did not
      Did
      Didn't
      Did
      Kroovas what is that?

    • @marysmith-ps7uj
      @marysmith-ps7uj 4 дні тому

      @@VergilTheLegendaryDarkSlayer LOL! I went ahead and bought the entire series to watch whenever I wanted!

  • @jimseven5358
    @jimseven5358 Місяць тому

    The chicken crossed the road, because it was too far to go around! LOLOL!

  • @jons387
    @jons387 Місяць тому +3

    Not bad story

  • @olle6431
    @olle6431 Місяць тому +1

    It's vibrating. Is it preparing to explode... That one got me. Hilarious. XD
    Oh... sh1t, another one... They are sending us their attack moves! XD

  • @jizziejustin
    @jizziejustin Місяць тому

    I genuinely enjoyed this story a few times I thought it was going to go in a different direction but it was really good

  • @Headloser
    @Headloser Місяць тому

    Who ever this story is brilliant in story line.

  • @Thomas-t7e2z
    @Thomas-t7e2z Місяць тому +1

    Excellent satire well told. I give 4.999 stars of 5. Very good but not perfect.

  • @v.d.d.1188
    @v.d.d.1188 Місяць тому

    Huuuuh, in a perfect universe this would've been..... perfect.😉

  • @mleboeuf8764
    @mleboeuf8764 Місяць тому

    "Dance of the Valkiries" would have been a good song for the space battle.

  • @jeffreyschuler7271
    @jeffreyschuler7271 Місяць тому

    Maybe make the picture of the galactic fleet the same as the narrative

  • @johnday8771
    @johnday8771 Місяць тому

    Explain Crazy Ivan turns to them

  • @MichaelLaw-t1c
    @MichaelLaw-t1c Місяць тому

    Commonsense versus WOKE. 😊

  • @aaronsmith8073
    @aaronsmith8073 Місяць тому

    Hahaha
    Well done!

  • @Bellator_of_the_Shadow
    @Bellator_of_the_Shadow Місяць тому

    erupted in chaos. other words they spoke in turn 😂

  • @anklebiterwoodworks2818
    @anklebiterwoodworks2818 Місяць тому +1

    Was not expecting that. David Weber, Timothy Zahn, Tom Clancy perfect. Divine chaos. THIS was a story that I always hoped would actually be First Contact. Not the horror Armageddon so stereotypically portrayed. This is along the lines of Eric Flint and David Freer's Rats, Bats, and Vats plus the sequel: The Rats, The Bats, and the Ugly. Whoever wrote this, I need a name! I want to read what else they wrote.

  • @Tjalie-j6i
    @Tjalie-j6i Місяць тому +1

    Noooo, we Dutch like order, so do our German cousins. What have you done ?!!!!!!!!

  • @AnilWang-fs4nj
    @AnilWang-fs4nj Місяць тому +1

    Here are some other chicken crossing the road answers:
    To escape the farmer’s wife’s cooking
    To get away from the farmer’s constant “egg-xpectations”
    Because people kept calling him "chicken" and he had something to prove.
    Sheesh....Does there have the be a reason? Can't a chicken just stretch his legs?
    To fulfill its destiny as a roadkill statistic
    To respond to the evolutionary pressure to cross roads and adapt to new environments
    To participate in the “Great Chicken Migration” and find a new home in the suburbs
    To find the meaning of life on the other side (spoiler alert: it’s still just a chicken)
    To demonstrate its ability to navigate complex spatial environments
    To transcend the boundaries of this side and explore the existential implications of the other side
    To experience the ontological shift that occurs when crossing the road
    To challenge the notion of “sides” and blur the lines between reality and fantasy
    To embody the concept of “becoming” and leave its old self behind
    To commemorate the 100th anniversary of the original “Why did the chicken cross the road?” joke
    To escape the farmer’s drone surveillance and find a new home in the “Fowl Internet”
    To fill out form TRG-1532 requesting permission to cross the road.
    To get away from Chuck Norris’ roundhouse kick.
    To get away from the T-1000, "Hasta la Vista… Poultry!"
    To get to the dark side… of the highway!
    To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.

  • @boffo63
    @boffo63 Місяць тому

    The story could have been 10 minutes and still worked.

  • @movieloverfan18
    @movieloverfan18 Місяць тому +1

    Humor is interesting. Behaviorists think that it is a fear response. Studying the behavior of Chimpanzees the reaction they have that is most like laughter is in response to one of them being suprised, but not in a way that hurts them. Or they are alright but the bad thing happened to a different Chimpanzee.
    If you analyze jokes the humor is a result of either the listeners own confusion , or it is making fun of someone else or laughing at their confusion, their limitations, or that other person's misfortunes.

  • @dennish.7708
    @dennish.7708 Місяць тому +1

    “We sort of just. Built rockets.”. Ugh. Take the time to get a human to read this aloud.

  • @hariseldon3786
    @hariseldon3786 Місяць тому +1

    lol lolo lol Sounds like Washington...

  • @AnonIllumi
    @AnonIllumi Місяць тому

    is this vulcans VS the romulans?

  • @jaysnewphone7005
    @jaysnewphone7005 Місяць тому

    'Where are you from?'
    '173-42-A; what about you?'
    'New York.'
    'I'll bet it's a strange place.'
    'It is.'
    After an unknown amount of time and an unknown amount of discussion later.
    'so you build out of stone.'
    'Yes and glass, which is melted sand; we're allowed to heat it. Carve the stone and stack it. We have furnishings. In the past we did not. What do you build out of?'
    '-exact wording forgotten-'
    'And what is that?'

  • @nevillehoward8736
    @nevillehoward8736 Місяць тому +1

    Huh, just wait till the humans see the Vogon ships!

    • @darthwiizius
      @darthwiizius Місяць тому

      Just wait till the Humans hear the Vogon poetry..

  • @remischmitt9308
    @remischmitt9308 Місяць тому +2

    Full of inconsistencies like ' follow at this distance' (no translation into metric); they never stepped inside but where amazed by how the ship looked on the inside;...
    If you can overlook those mistakes it's a reasonable story.
    I recommend you read some books from real writers instead.
    Or wait for this AI to learn more... in 10 years he might be a decent writer.

  • @outforbeer
    @outforbeer Місяць тому

    Are there any good sci fi novels where human meet aliens empires for the first time that led to a war with human losing at first but crawl back by stealing alien tech and improving earth tech. Something similar to stargate sg 1

    • @chrisa.1740
      @chrisa.1740 Місяць тому

      Babylon 5 is based on that type of conflict having happened before the series starts.

  • @biffgee6797
    @biffgee6797 Місяць тому +1

    Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.
    Why did The adventurous chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide.
    Why did the robot cross the road? It was programmed by the chicken.

  • @souplike.homogenate
    @souplike.homogenate Місяць тому

    wait, how do I get the Space Shark story as shown by the background ships?

  • @jimlassiter749
    @jimlassiter749 14 днів тому

    the v.o. needs to be the british version....

  • @tyeadel
    @tyeadel Місяць тому

    Our district council would benefit from this.

  • @Shinobubu
    @Shinobubu 26 днів тому

    No plan survives contact with the enemy.

  • @redrexgames8458
    @redrexgames8458 23 дні тому

    Pov the E4 mafia makes first contact

  • @honilock577
    @honilock577 22 дні тому

    Prompt: a Douglas Adams story
    Don't need anything more lmao

  • @ericlondon2663
    @ericlondon2663 Місяць тому

    Glass the empire.
    Use the xenos for food

  • @stanbarker3764
    @stanbarker3764 Місяць тому

    After sending word back, I'd have had my chief engineer speed us up and slow us down just to yo yo the hell out of that proper distance. Claim minor engine troubles

  • @MartinLovasz-r7r
    @MartinLovasz-r7r Місяць тому

    How did Smith get a cat?

  • @matthewlloyd2501
    @matthewlloyd2501 Місяць тому

    Fun story I just dont get what they are finding so funny in the beginning before learning anything about the empire

  • @Wirmish
    @Wirmish Місяць тому

    So the "Aliens" are just unions?

  • @gabrieldjatienza6971
    @gabrieldjatienza6971 Місяць тому

    It better an Empire without the Sith...if run by humans. the astronauts have lots of options.

  • @Wolfen443
    @Wolfen443 Місяць тому +1

    It was interesting and guess full of irony. But very unlikely to have the Star Trek ending it got. I certainly hope that first contact is not with the Vulcans, even the galactic Empires of Star Wars or LOGH, or even Warhammer are better. This is just terribly tragically funny for a first contact. Our free wiling culture is the most dangerous weapon we have, apparently. So, that is how the Europeans more practical and driven conquered the world in the age of colonization?.

  • @leexgx
    @leexgx Місяць тому

    It’s too bad. He didn’t see productivity improved by 300%. 😅

  • @shadowmystery5613
    @shadowmystery5613 Місяць тому

    Our "primitive language has limitations" 😂
    Bro' never heard about german and _Rindfleischetikettierungsüberwachungsaufgabenübertragungsgesetz_

  • @JamesKoji-f6j
    @JamesKoji-f6j Місяць тому

    Fulgrim what does fulcrum doing in this arm of the Galaxy

  • @keithdouggosse2181
    @keithdouggosse2181 Місяць тому +1

    Suppressing emotions with all the perfection as well? Vulcans taken to the nth degree

  • @vmwindustries
    @vmwindustries Місяць тому

    Definitely made by A.I., and the A.I. thinks that humour is just humans being rude to eachother about things we don't understand.

  • @ChristoFerrus
    @ChristoFerrus Місяць тому

    How wpuld anyone know the cermony if its first contact...
    Ur lucky im bored af

  • @RioEin
    @RioEin Місяць тому

    i like that all of these sci fi stories have all judged human ships are just going to be metal boxes and non-sense blobs with only the lowest sense of a "navel battleship but in space"

    • @KurtShaw-v4w
      @KurtShaw-v4w 4 дні тому

      *naval. Your navel is your bellybutton and doesn't usually have anything to do with ships.

  • @bfwilley1
    @bfwilley1 14 годин тому

    (Original story, written and owned by me) What's your HFY user name?
    Was this or anything else you have done been posted on HFY? Or are you just another HFY rip off?

  • @leroybarron6005
    @leroybarron6005 Місяць тому

    So aliens have german names

  • @ChristoFerrus
    @ChristoFerrus Місяць тому

    I dont get the laughter..
    Feels like a drunk narcissist wrote this

  • @ogoglethorp
    @ogoglethorp Місяць тому

    no like no hate but the story shited sides at 29:38 stupid AI.

    • @flitsertheo
      @flitsertheo Місяць тому

      Yes, the Swarm suddenly changed from being chaotic to being perfect geometrical.

  • @Shakar322
    @Shakar322 Місяць тому

    So boring and chaotic writing. Waste of time to listen.

  • @AxysofAnarchy
    @AxysofAnarchy Місяць тому

    sigh, another disappointment of science fantasy.

  • @davidjames1063
    @davidjames1063 Місяць тому

    Story describes geometric shaps, but the thumbnail shows what look like fish designs. This incongruentcy earned a Thumbs Down. I will NOT be subscribing, and will block your channel from my feeds.
    Try a bit of consistency, or others with higher standards will dump you too.

  • @leexgx
    @leexgx Місяць тому

    It’s too bad. He didn’t see productivity improved by 300%. 😅