@@Ethan-nl2wg Pun, 'face heel turn' is a wrestling term for when somebody shockingly goes full bad, here Kylo's face literally heals when he turns against his new teacher
@/videos Cause Tumblrites only care about wish fulfillment. They will most often even "ship" the actors themselves and harass them in their social media accounts because they want to fantasize about their characters being gay.
Number 15: Every Night Nightmare Screams. The last thing you'd want every night is to wake up screaming, but as it turns out, that might be what you get.
It's magnificent but I'm not sure I'd trade it for the many-many-layered absurd glory of, "I'M THE SPY!" To keep my mockery of that line short. 1) Your enemy's fighting an asymmetric war against you - they probably have many, many spies in the First Order - you're only _'the_ spy' to the audience. 2) The framing and the way it's shot is so overblown I couldn't stop laughing for several minutes in the theatre (thankfully I laugh silently or a lot of folks would have been pissed off). 3) ...dude, we know. You just shot three of your own guys. 4) As Jenny covered in her video on the actual Episode IX, his reason for being THE SPY is comically absurd. It's so bad, they'd probably have been better just not explaining it at all. 5) Seriously, that framing. I still smile thinking about it. The sum total of things I enjoyed in that movie were Poe's _incredibly_ basic character arc, with which I thought Oscar Isaacs did really well, the long take of the gang trying and failing to escape prior to that scene, the astronomical corniness of a cavalry charge along the top of a Star Destroyer and, "I'M THE SPY," being shot as if it was the most important plot point in the entire movie. Weird that both shining lights involved Hux, now that I think about it, but then they were shining lights of glorious stupidity.
...although this does also have, "tell me the odds Threepio, I like numbers," which might be the feeblest attempt at callback... fan... service(?) I've ever seen. Like, I can't read it any other way. "Remember when Han used to get pissed off at C-3PO for telling him the odds? Here's someone... doing the opposite in an embarrassingly clunky way because I haven't been able to think of anything for her to say that's remotely in-character for a while and out-of-character is better than nothing. Huh? That do anything for you?"
@@Pineappolis I actually kind of like "He lost the Star Wars." The idea of him committing lightsaber seppuku is a lot cooler than getting unceremoniously shot by Admiral Nobody.
Seriously Palpatine did that, The whole lost the will to live things was the droids best explanation for Palpatine draining her life, they even show you her happy and still with hope for anakin. This is probably the most overlooked plot point in all the prequels. Palpatines final betrayal, the power promised to vader killing the one he wanted to save.
This cockroach Sith thing pisses me off so hard because there is actually some genuine potential here, with this evil counterpart of Yoda. Of course that would have been introduced at least back in TLJ for it to work... but even then, when Kylo first encounters him, it feels like this dude is an ultimate badass that will make Kylo look like a Sith pony. And then... he goes down like a fucking punk. Without as much as putting up a minor fight. Jesus Christ, Trevorrow, no wonder all of your movies suck.
If they were going to power up Kylo, they should've just had him gaining strength through Dark Side lore and the damage he does - a Darksider can feed on that if I understand the lore. You could do even do it with fanservicey relics in his throne room and a "in my travels I have walked on Korriban/Rusaan/Mustafar" reference.
It was HUX! Hux was the child who’s father bought him a giant fake spider because he had no friends!!!! And then it disintegrated over time and now his character is driven by the bitterness of rejection and LOSS! O_O
Leia: It's a shame, but there's nothing left to do about my son, you'll have to kill him Rey: I believe there's still good in him Leia (Louder): Yes, such a shame but there's nothing we can do! Rey: No really I think I can bring him to- Leia (Even louder): SUCH A TERRIBLE TRAGEDY, BUT I'M AFRAID THERE'S NO OTHER CHOICE!
It would have been a cool idea for the character if it had been established in the first movie rather than just in the final film, like ‘oh yeah this was always part of his arc’
Same except focusing chi and Kamehameha because Dragon Ball. I still try now and then because you never know for sure you're just not powerful enough yet.
@@ThatBoogieman @GGR Makes omfg, same. You still gotta go out of your way to try occasionally tho, just in case. The same as you check out weird things like sidewalk cracks and super reflective water and things that could definitely be portals to other magical worlds.
In-house snark isn't always efficient, sometimes you've gotta outsource. It's just going to be cheaper and better than re-inventing the wheel for every project.
@@phoenixdzkYou're absolutely right about Donald Glover, but they don't have to wait for the actor to fill in the blank. Surely they can find *somebody* funny.
I was cracking up at that too. I thought she’d find a way to circumvent the force sucking, maybe overwhelm him and burn him? But no, she dies twice LMFAO
They did, give or take, try this approach in the theatrical release with, "I'm the spy." It was wildly, wildly entertaining but did ultimately prove your suspicions by dint of not saving anything.
Hux had like the most anticlimactic death ever--I burst out laughing at his death. Not saying I hated TROS, but that caught me off-guard and made me laugh XD
@@drakeredwingofficial The way his hair just fans around as he's shot made me burst into laughter in the middle of the cinema. I can't explain why, it's just so....it looked so goddamn silly lol
I'm sure the Phantom Menace screenplay said "as the music begins to swell, the dark figure pulls back his hood to reveal a mass of horns; a head as spiky as a punk bracelet"
It’s so interesting to me with the foster/trevorrow/abrams treatments how every single person apparently watched episodes 7 and 8 and totally projected their own weird hang ups onto the same material. it’s like a rorschach test instead of cohesive storytelling
"projected their own weird hang ups onto the same material." I think you just described part of the process of film analysis. If three different people watch a film, it stands to reason that they might come away with three different interpretations.
@@dapeach06 tbf that can work, witness the Dark Knight Trilogy (and a lot of the MCU is plainly improvised, hence Tony blows up all his suits in Iron Man 3 but then has even more come Age of Ultron). The problem is in the execution, that IX ends up flying in the face of the themes of VIII because the writers failed or refused to engage with them.
I hate that every version of episode nine backtracks on Rey’s parentage. Like, let her be a nobody. THAT’S THE POINT. Some kid who had a rough childhood can still grow up to be a good person who does great things.
Especially since while people rarely have family that were tragically murdered to protect them or be decended from evil overlords, many people, as unfortunate as it is, have parents where were normal, shitty, neglectful people. No grand dark mystery, just assholes. Having Rey come from that sort background would not only be better for the story but would resonate with a lot of people, and it's honestly sad that the writers didn't think that was a story worth telling.
I hope that writing a good Episode Nine is just an unsolvable problem because if not it means the best that Hollywood’s “top screenwriting talent” could manage are all awful in their own special ways.
I was always a shipper of Fin and Rey! Maybe with Poe and Rose both having an unrequited crush on Fin. Rey and Kylo is cringy and Rey and Poe is just "What!?".
Finn's arc should have been him going from Trooper to Rebel, but in TFA that happens in 5 minutes and he kills his former comrades without a second thought. Phasma should have been Finn's mentor, adding tension to their conflicting paths.
i'd argue finn's character was ruined the second j.j. had him shoot his fellow soldiers without a second thought. that moment basically solidified that the whole defecting stormtrooper thing was a superficial attempt to distinguish him from the other new characters. having finn lead a stormtrooper rebellion after all that would be kinda uncomfortable.
Jenny: "It's really annoying to read a screenplay as a single person." Meanwhile BB is waiting the whole episode for her to turn around so he can confess his love.
"A pair of blue eyes snap open. Leia" Carrie Fisher had brown eyes lol. So does Adam Driver, Finn Boyega, Oscar Isaac and to an extent Daisy Ridley. I almost feel that it's kind of insulting for Trevorrow to apparently assume the beautiful princess has blue eyes.
There's a few things that sound racially problematic in this, from assuming the princess has perfect blue eyes, to making Rey put on a Sari in a Middle-Eastern inspired area "full of freaks" to make Poe see her "exotic beauty", on top of the complete dumping of Finn & Rose from the main plot to focus on the most marketable leads to force into a relationship. It all feels really icky just how unapologetically shameless the script is in trying to whitewash the main cast (and making Poe the cliché bad boy because he too isn't white).
"-staring at her just as Chewbacca was throwing him a wrench" I like to think that the wrench hit Poe in the head, killing him instantly and mercifully freeing him from this godawful script
I am imagining it as a comedy skit where the whole thing is a metaphor for a couple having lame sex. Hux: "Feel my power!" Underling: "Ack! Oh god! Ahhh!" Hux: "... you're faking it, aren't you?" Underling: "N-no...!" Hux: "You are. I've seen how you react when *Ren* force chokes you."
The rebel fleet are struggling against palpatine’s star destroyers. They’re badly outnumbered. But then Ships begin to warp in, one, two, a dozen, two dozen, soon hundreds arrive. The rebel’s call to arms has been answered. “You mess with one of us, you mess with all of us!”
Someone needs to say, "they won the star wars," in a Star Wars movie so that in the following movie someone can say, "you may have won the star battle, but not the star war."
Kylo would NEVER refer to Vader as “Anakin Skywalker.” Ever. “Anakin Skywalker” is his Jedi name. “Darth Vader” is the version of Anakin Kylo looked up to, and referring to him as Anakin instead of Vader implies that Kylo’s descended from the Skywalkers. An identity he’s trying to distance himself from. Trevorrow didn’t understand any of the characters
This reminds me of Count Dooku who has the BEST sith lord name and yet nobody refers to him as Darth Tyrannus 😂 He must have felt so fucking cool when he came up with that and everyone just went ...nah well just call you Dooku.
Please don’t take this the wrong way but this reminds me of a TikTok I saw of someone calling out transphobic Star Wars fans for insisting that people not deadname Darth Vader but refusing to respect the wishes of people in the real world. I know literally none of that is what you’re talking about it’s just something that entered my mind
Honestly just start comparing everything to punk clothing. The tower was taller than punk boots. The night was darker than punk lipstick. See? powerful.
The concept of Rey having a makeover montage with Poe being the judge makes me smile every time. It's like a teen comedy where Rey is the protagonist trying to impress a guy and Poe is the gay best friend.
@@aswarmofcrabs Honestly, if we were to have Rey still being interested in Kylo, it should be after he's shown there's still good in him. The reveal that she had been pining while he was Supreme Leader really stuck in the craw for me.
@@aswarmofcrabs I'll do ya one better: they're both dating Finn, but not each other. ReyFinnPoe 4thewin. Kylo... he can stay if he actually redeens himself, which he kinda started to do in VII but certainly didn't finish doing in IX. Honestly I think it'd be hilarious if he redeems himself so hard he adopts prequel-era jedi doctrine, so he's voluntarily celibate like. Well good thing you found a less destructive path I guess
Hannah Raquel I thought I was the only one that was like ???? I can’t believe Jenny didn’t notice that! Carrie’s big brown doe-eyes were one of her most distinguishing features!
@@SimmerRose It's also one of the reasons why casting Adam Driver as her son was such a good move imo because he has a bit of the same doe-eyed quality combined with Harrison's longer facial shape. And drawing attention to that would make sense for the scene since it's cutting from him to her but guess not lol
I recently adopted a cat, and I was showing him some YT videos of other cats. He watched enthralled. I decided to show him this video, and he also watched enthralled. He has no knowledge of any Star Wars property, so I think you can consider him a fan not of your content, but of your presentation. If he ever runs away and shows up at your door, his name is Robert and he likes cat treats quite a lot.
Full respect to the fact that both Abrams and Trevorrow find the idea of extreme poverty so unrelatable that they couldn't imagine a protagonist whose pauper parents could sell her for money they spent on alcohol, and just wrote that plot point out.
It’s weird people fixated on Rey’s parents so much, the impression I got was that she was deluding herself into thinking they would come back for her when it was pretty obvious they abandoned her from the word go.
Rey Nobody was a mystery box JJ wanted to save the true reveal of Rey’s background for the final installment Rey being Han and Leias daughter was on the table; Rey was based on the character Kira Solo from George’s draft Of course nothing was set in stone, however Rian needed some kind of “I am your father” moment and Rey Nobody was the only one that was retractable depending on what the following filmmaker wanted to do Remember: Rian could have shown Rey’s parents in the cave vision but he didn’t. He could have had their names/surnames mentioned but he didn’t. And we could have seen the flashback of Reys parents dumping her on Jakku in TLJ but we didn’t. Last but not least Kylo ren despite being a bargain basement Darth Vader has somewhat of a reason to lie as he wants her to join him Anyway see Star Wars Apocrypha by Nerdnonymous The moral is when George Lucas hands you a story for the sequel trilogy then THAT is the story of the sequel trilogy
@@KRobinson-ko1neI get what you’re saying but Rian DID give us an answer, most people just weren’t happy with it. I am sad that JJ felt the need to say Rian’s answer wasn’t good enough.
@@KRobinson-ko1ne Rian didn't show Rey's parents in the cave vision because it was about Rey's fear that she's truly alone, her parents did in fact abandon her and she has no one but herself. And he didn't show them leaving or give them names because they fundamentally do not matter to the story he was telling.
i forgot this was a part of the script and upon reading this comment laughed so hard i could barely breathe for like a full minute remembering both the line and jennys absolute incredulity upon reading it. its like asking someone to show you a map to a location you need to find because you Like Shapes. who says this
I desperately want this to start a trend of screenwriters attempting to write their version of episode IX. If only so we can have Jenny read the results of Hollywood’s finest dashing themselves against the rocks.
Every time he force-chokes somebody, Obi Wan doesn’t say anything, but he floats into Vader’s eyeline with a ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)-vader is too afraid to ask so he just gets a little uncomfortable every time it happens
You get that experience with everything he writes, it feels like. I had this EXACT same epiphany when I watched "The Book of Henry" 🤣 The man writes characters he thinks are likeable, but since they're based on his own sense of what that word means, they're kind of terrible.
@@BallinBubblegum It's honestly hard to say he has more self restraint. I make a rule of not assuming things about artists' personalities based on their work (that's how you get people who don't believe Shakespeare was Shakespeare because he never taught his wife to read when the simpler answer is that, you know, he was busy, she wasn't super-interested and he just didn't believe in the transcendent glory of the written word as much as some people assume based on his works enough to push it) but, when you can see the director's notes, even I have a little trouble sticking to that given how much he seems to wear his worldview on his sleeve. At the very least, you can say that he's consistent in the kinds of decisions he makes in his writing and that _might_ speak to his character. Michael Bay, on the other hand, ultimately just makes products to sell to target demographics (generally very successfully, for better or worse). For all that his movies idolise the US military and US patriotism, he did (allegedly - it's possible the actor misremembered or made it up) refuse to use an ad-libbed joke in one of the Transformers movies with his cited reason being that, "it wouldn't play in China."
@@Pineappolis"the transcendent glory of the written word" doesn't seem like it was Shakespeare's own perspective of his work but just how people perceived it in hindsight. I think people pay more attention to the cultural gravitas of Shakespeare's work rather than the work itself when they try to extrapolate Shakespeare's character. I think solely looking at his work would give people a more accurate idea.
@@arowace498 Excellent point. I was going for my own rhetorical device where I wrote in the 'voice' of the kinds of people I'm talking about but, crucially, I forgot the sardonic quotation marks.
I took a short nap in the middle and woke up around the 40 minutes mark to Jenny wiggling her arms and making an octopus impression and I feel like I missed an important plot point of the movie.
lmaooooo jenny is on FIRE today "he died as he lived: WASTING MY TIME" "allow me to look at this whole script with a look that could be perceived as disappointment"
@@hellformichelle I keep meaning to do some digging on this subject but was this (Poe possibly being into Finn in TFA) widely discussed before Oscar Isaacs mentioned it in the run-up to RoS? I remember asking a few people, back when TFA first came out, whether they got that impression or whether they thought he was just being directed to act as such a charismatic 'Ace Rimmer' type that he would come across as at least vaguely flirtatious with anyone he spoke to whether the intention was there or not. Responses were noncommittal at best, though, so I figured I was just imagining things.
@Han Organa Awesome, thanks for the information - as I say, I always wondered. I have to say I'm seriously impressed by Oscar Isaac's acting, that being the case, because I'm typically pretty oblivious to romantic chemistry in media unless it's heavily telegraphed in the film language or outright stated in the text itself. To get me to register it purely through nuance of performance in a couple of short scenes that had so much else going on takes some talent. From John Boyega too, obviously, but I feel like it's a much more common talking point that he gave a stellar performance in TFA than Isaacs (largely due to the difference in screen time, I guess).
I don't why my brain immediately thought of the song "Sweet Transvestite" from Rocky Horror Picture Show but as "Creepy Heterosexual" instead, but here we are
@@PerpetuallyDaydreaming they’re all in blue short sleeve button ups and khakis, and it’s a room full of people who’re worried about dancing “too gay” It’s artwork
If Jenny did one of those "taking a picture every day for a year" things it would just be her in her room and the only thing that would change would be her hats
But they all just stack up on one another like with the Vader hat on top of the bucket hat, and at the end of the year it's some Seussian stack of hats.
1:02:37 "Is this to just tell us that Kylo Ren is not jacked in real life?" Um, excuse you, a buddy of mine saw Kylo Ren take his shirt off in the shower and he said that Kylo Ren had an 8-pack. That Kylo Ren was shredded.
I love the implication in this comment that Kylo Ren does not remove his clothing until he is physically already inside a (choosing to extrapolate here for the comedy) already turned on shower, v funny imagery that also fits more with his characterisation than some things in these various script treatments
I like to imagine that Luke shows up to the dojo with a bad 90s abstinence only sex ed video and 90% of Rey’s training is abstinence only sex education.
With Hux being a huge Jedi fanboy, it would have been a hilarious twist if he overcame the force-power-barrier, gained absurd power, killed Kylo, and then fought Rey. Just because.
Okay but why would that lowkey save it in a way. Then like Kylo still gets redemption and we get to see him fight along side Rey and maybe if they love the force healing so much use it there. Like rey is down in battle and kylo puts in the finishing blow to his rival and maybe bring like luke and leia back to be like look son/nephew we are not disappointed in you anymore and believe you can be redeemed after all. There could even be some snarky back and forth, allowing redeemed kylo to actually have dialogue and then heals rey and dies again. Still weird screen play but like it's something interesting and a choice. Still think episode 9 was just kinda fated to fail since there was a lot riding on it.
I think her asking C3PO for the odds was supposed to be a clever(?) homage to Han telling him "never tell me the odds!". "I like numbers" was just awful dialog to avoid making it too obvious. Which is silly considering all the other blatant call-backs and fan-service
Rey, Finn and Poe deserved a better trilogy. They had so much potential and despite the mess, I still actually like them. It makes me so sad that there was basically nothing good by the end of it all. It's so tragic.
@@BagzAndPresident No they were good actors Im sure, thats how they got the job. Its the script they were put in that was awful just like how hayden christiensen was given a mediocre script but was still a talented actor nonetheless. you cant go blaming actors for their scripts that the writers wrote
Platypus Mode The whole trilogy should’ve been better, it doesn’t stand out as its own. A lot of fanboys hate it because of pretty petty reasons but I feel like the entire trilogy is a waste of potential. It relied too much on the original trilogy and it’s characters that it didn’t let it be it’s own thing(TROS is a huge example of this). TLJ is the best because it doesn’t feel like a rehash. TFA feels like ANH retreaded and TROS does the same with ROTJ but worse. It pandered to an audience that ended up hating it anyway.
@@TheWeeklyFangirl I'm pretty sure they read everything they could that was even remotely Star Wars related to try and right the ship. We all know how that worked out.
It just made me think "Earth" and how much I hated the end of Animal Farm and then feel bad for pigs and having to internally apologize for letting the analogy taint my view. Pigs are amazing. Pigs are so much more empathetic than humans that many groups are now saying it is unethical to use them as therapy pets because they feel more deeply than we do.
@@alienatedlibrarian5017have you been on a farm before? Pigs are cool and def can be great pets but they aren’t some transcendent and emotionally superior animal either
Me: sitting here wondering why Jenny Nicholson hasn't released a new video in a while Jenny: *is trying on different hats and editing together a miniature one woman play*
@@Flowtail I decided to give the video a thumbs up at "decided to solve this problem by wearing MANY hats," and then looked for a place to post saying that I did.
Not sure what's worse, sidelining Rose entirely or giving her the line "tell me the odds, I like numbers". Also why did both versions of IX want to retcon her parents being terrible people. Why did neither writer just leave it alone.
I think she would have been better off with the horrible dialogue, ‘cause at least then she would have some ironic fans. The way things are, her existence is just pathetic.
I actually thought a better version of that line would be pretty cool. Rose leaps into her fighter, pressing buttons and saying "Threepio tell me the odds." Threepio tells her the odds She sneers "Just how I like em." Or some badass or quirky snark like that.
I wish they'd elaborated more on what a freak show in the Star Wars universe would even entail. "Behold! A Gormulax with eleven arms, instead of the usual nine!" Or maybe the big attraction would be like a suburban dad with a sweater vest. WEIRD!
"Behold, a Galllifreyan Time Lord! And this they call a Hobbit, nay... THE HOBBIT! Over here is the jewel, the creme of the creme... oh yes, good brothers and sisters, its... the only Episode IX script that is actually filmmable!"
That would actually be cool. Honestly that whole scene already IS super cool. I just have a thing for characters realising they've lost and ending it on their own terms. It shows strength.
"And also bizarre that there are apparently versions of the script pairing Rey with every lead man except for Finn. Was that option just never on the table? And if not, hmn! I wonder why not? What's different about Finn?" THE SHADE
@@mrman6035 The poster is Rey and Finn kissing (spoiler alert) except he's so small he's holding onto her lower lip. Also, fun fact, the biggest movie ever released in China came out the same year that TFA shrank Boyega's face, it was Fast and Furious 7, it had a mostly-black cast, and everyone's face was equally sized on the posters. That was Disney making an executive decision to hide Finn, not China.
It’s strange to because I felt like Finn and Rey were set up to possibly be couple in TFA. I guess the filmmakers thought it better to be in an abusive relationship than with a Black man.
The fact that, across these 3 alternate versions of episode 9 we have, Rey is pined after by Poe, a guy she works with whom she has no chemistry with, and also by goddamn c3po, without either of these authors ever considering pairing her with Finn is goddamn hilarious. Threepio is just too irresistible
@@danielmclaughlin5546 "When you sing the song of Ice and Fire or play the Game of Thrones: The officially licensed browser game, you win or you die. Many geods available."
the whole "guy teases girl who's just all business but she secretly likes it" trope would be less obnoxious and gross if he knew how to write a funny woman. like if claire from jurassic park had been sarcastic and goofy back at him or if rey had been silly with poe i wouldn't be going "UUUUGH" about it
“I would have liked to see you write mutual banter between two bonding friends in a wartime situation, instead of grimy workplace sexual harassment citations” “What do you mean? It’s flirty and fun? She’s clearly into it by not responding more than she has to” “Oh No”
am just imagining a dynamic where goofy character A just doesnt understand sarcasm and "serious" character B doesnt get the humour in goof. both are thinking theyre trying to tease the other and get mildly annoyed the attempts dont seem to bear any fruits. idiots to lovers.
@@JRA6192 I wouldn't criticize it for being too cheesy, but for dropping such a critical, world-changing plot point as "BTW Emperor Palpatine is back" in the opening crawl. That's the sort of thing that should go in the second movie of a trilogy rather than the opening crawl of the third...and if you didn't get to make the second movie, maybe you shouldn't just run with your original idea for a trilogy finale anyways.
The only way to save this line would be to play it like it's the character being inarticulate, not the writer being a dumbass. Like something Joss Whedon would write.
almost everything about this script is like…really, really awful, but the ending with finn and rose running a sanctuary for baby force sensitives is so good and perfect i could cry. woah.
@@janjanbinks1710 I honestly feel like this version has the most to go off of to make an actually good version of episode 9. Scrap creepy workplace harasser Poe and give Kylo Ren some like actual motivations instead of “his face is gross ew” and you have like a halfway decent movie. At the very least it would be better than any version utilizing the structure of Rise of Skywalker lmao.
@@pexilated1638 literally nothing about kylo arc is good why would his mom donest care and even ask him to d!e to save rey why would he even do that cuz in this ver he doesnt even love her just soooo bad and why is luke chosen rey side out of nowhere she wasnt trying to save the world
@@ryochan9438 I’m not saying the Trevorrow script wholesale is *good,* it’s still dumb af and riddled with plotholes. It would need a lot of work to make it good, but at the very least it does not contain the phrase “somehow palpatine has returned” which already puts it at least one notch above Rise of Skywalker
She's watched Episodes 7 + 8 a loooooooooootttt of times. Like, a LOT of times. She's pretty much memorized large sections of the films, especially Kylo Ren 'cause she likes his character a lot. :D
@@etherealsky7078 I suspect you may be onto something, if you look at his Jurassic World work he appears to have a weird... thing about alpha male types. My point was just that Rey already has ample reason to reject Kylo, based solely on him choosing to be the tyrant. And it's weird that Trevorrow didn't simply go with that.
Alec Ferris Once again, I know a lot of people desperately want Rey to not be with Kylo... But whether you like it or not, when there’s a whole movie building up to their relationship (TLJ) and another riddled with hints about it (TFA), it feels very cheap to discard it last minute in the third movie.
When will a main character get stabbed with a space weapon that gives them 48 hours of lactose intolerance “That’s how I got my autism, a space wizard came into my childhood home on Halloween, and in his attempts to defeat my ultimate form (an unarmed human baby) he accidentally granted me power immaterial. So far it has not gone away. The government won’t tell you” u can’t say that
Blind Jedi are cool, too! I mean, they could make pretty much _any_ physical disability really cool with the force, but something about a blindfolded Jedi getting around like a force-sensitive Toph is just really cool.
“If Rey is a Skywalker”: Denial “Star Wars Episode IX Bingo”: Bargaining “I Read the Terrible Episode IX Pitch Where Rey is a Robot”: Anger “Oh No! The Rise of Skywalker was Real Bad :(“: Depression “Well. Let’s Read Colin Trevorrow’s Episode IX Script”: Acceptance
Hux absentmindedly runs his fingers through his Suspiciously Silvering hair before once again reaching out to the vintage lightsaber. Face twisting with effort, sweat dripping from his brow. Yet it refuses him, just like every attempt before. His spirits fall with his hand. Deep down he knows he will never be the Grey Jedi that Jenny wanted to see in this franchise.
Yeah, the Rise of Skywalker back-and-forth with them complaining about the other damaging the Falcon/BB-8 made a lot more sense than... this Yikes-O-Rama.
Honestly it just makes it feel like such a fanfic to me. Like after the insane amount of romantic tension between Rey and Kyle in episode, the idea that Poe is the one pursuing Rey in this script is so absurd to me
It kinda feels more like he wanted to write a romantic comedy roadtrip fanfic with rey and poe but he also had this hux and kylo angst fic he was pretty proud of and just fused them together, it doesn't feel like an actual star wars movie in the slightest.
Splitting up the gang is a large part of that, I think. I appreciate what he was trying to do, but it would seem more fitting to have Rey fight her final battle alongside her friends. And for Kylo to meet his end on the battlefield, with the whole Resistance looking on.
@@zacharywood9416 In the script, Poe and Rey do that movie cliche where they pretend to be lovers kissing so that the stormtroopers don't see their faces and leave them alone; Jenny imagines the characters in Jurassic World doing this to confuse velociraptors.
Much of this reads like pretty bad fanfiction, but ain't gonna lie, Hux being a fanboy surrounded by Star Wars merchandise (I mean, it isn't, but it is. Come on) actually made me chuckle.
I really want to know how the hell he god Mace Windus Lightsber and if it has any significance at all or if Trevorrow simply thought that people would recognise it.
My read is that torvalen isn't even evil. He's just a kindly carnival man who teaches cool magic tricks like pretty colored hand lightning and pig fueled cosmetic facial reconstruction and is entirely unaware of the potentially insedious uses of his fun sorccery.
Like Bozo the Clown using black magic and deals with demons to pull coins from the back of kids ears, and then being so heartbroken when one of his student uses said black magic to do decidedly not fun things like murdering people and resurrecting dictators
I think they executed Kylo''s face heal turn pretty well
Why is this pinned?
@@Ethan-nl2wg Pun, 'face heel turn' is a wrestling term for when somebody shockingly goes full bad, here Kylo's face literally heals when he turns against his new teacher
Ethan there are always really random things pinned on this channel. Idk y
@@Ethan-nl2wg Jenny usually pins comments she really loves. That's all!
Ng You Bbbgi ah that makes sense
Rey temporarily dying and then coming back could translate into a perfect crucifixion/revival sequence, perhaps in an Easter play of sorts
Maybe there could be a post crucification lament…
i love this comment. gotta go deep into jenny nicholson cinematic universe
best comment
Those who live by the lightsaber, die by the lightsaber...
*[random bits of racism from a pastor]*
Fin giving Poe his jacket back: Since it turns out we’re not gay, I guess you can have this back.
No, giving back the jacket is a total breakup move.
@Spiro Agnew he was a little short for a storm trooper
Lmao I'm dead
@/videos Cause Tumblrites only care about wish fulfillment. They will most often even "ship" the actors themselves and harass them in their social media accounts because they want to fantasize about their characters being gay.
@ Poe's actor explicitly said he played the character as romantically interested in Finn and wanted them to be together
Rey: I need to share my inner world with you so I have prepared *a numbered list*
she should have shared it with rose, since she loves numbers
You won't believe number 5!! 😲🤯
Number 15: Every Night Nightmare Screams. The last thing you'd want every night is to wake up screaming, but as it turns out, that might be what you get.
Shaun Cheah that comment was extremely well executed
Ok let's talk about theme! What are my internal struggles *about* ?
This script is a severely mixed bag, but "he lost the star wars" in the script notes is unmitigated genius.
It's magnificent but I'm not sure I'd trade it for the many-many-layered absurd glory of, "I'M THE SPY!"
To keep my mockery of that line short.
1) Your enemy's fighting an asymmetric war against you - they probably have many, many spies in the First Order - you're only _'the_ spy' to the audience.
2) The framing and the way it's shot is so overblown I couldn't stop laughing for several minutes in the theatre (thankfully I laugh silently or a lot of folks would have been pissed off).
3) ...dude, we know. You just shot three of your own guys.
4) As Jenny covered in her video on the actual Episode IX, his reason for being THE SPY is comically absurd. It's so bad, they'd probably have been better just not explaining it at all.
5) Seriously, that framing. I still smile thinking about it. The sum total of things I enjoyed in that movie were Poe's _incredibly_ basic character arc, with which I thought Oscar Isaacs did really well, the long take of the gang trying and failing to escape prior to that scene, the astronomical corniness of a cavalry charge along the top of a Star Destroyer and, "I'M THE SPY," being shot as if it was the most important plot point in the entire movie.
Weird that both shining lights involved Hux, now that I think about it, but then they were shining lights of glorious stupidity.
...although this does also have, "tell me the odds Threepio, I like numbers," which might be the feeblest attempt at callback... fan... service(?) I've ever seen. Like, I can't read it any other way. "Remember when Han used to get pissed off at C-3PO for telling him the odds? Here's someone... doing the opposite in an embarrassingly clunky way because I haven't been able to think of anything for her to say that's remotely in-character for a while and out-of-character is better than nothing. Huh? That do anything for you?"
i love it when he went "it's starwarsing time" and then proceeded to star all over the wars. truly, one of the scipts of all time.
I feel like “You lost the Star Wars” on screen could have been the end of Episode IX.
@@Pineappolis I actually kind of like "He lost the Star Wars." The idea of him committing lightsaber seppuku is a lot cooler than getting unceremoniously shot by Admiral Nobody.
“Projection of his ideal self”
Kylo ren has a self-insert OC that he forced Rey to look at
We should just be grateful it wasn't an anthropomorphic wolf.
Nah, he's just going through a pretentious phase and has been reading a lot of Lacan.
Kylo Ren, photo-shopping the navel-high trousers onto his body: this is what peak performance looks like. You may not like it
Matt the Radar Tech
This sounds hilarious and I can only imagine him looking more like a edgelord vader.
Medical droids know how to solve sith face cancer but you'd better not lose the will to live during childbirth
*Dr Ball, MD hated that*
Meddroid: We can fuse metal plates to your soul to keep you alive.
Padme: ight imma head out
sadness is very lethal to women, don't you know
That was palps who killed her bro bro. Told Vader it was him.
Seriously Palpatine did that, The whole lost the will to live things was the droids best explanation for Palpatine draining her life, they even show you her happy and still with hope for anakin.
This is probably the most overlooked plot point in all the prequels. Palpatines final betrayal, the power promised to vader killing the one he wanted to save.
"Wow, he died the way he lived... WASTING MY TIME."
I am genuinely taken aback at the savagery.
Jenny can throw nuclear-level shade when she wants to.
She is frigging hilarious.
This cockroach Sith thing pisses me off so hard because there is actually some genuine potential here, with this evil counterpart of Yoda. Of course that would have been introduced at least back in TLJ for it to work... but even then, when Kylo first encounters him, it feels like this dude is an ultimate badass that will make Kylo look like a Sith pony. And then... he goes down like a fucking punk. Without as much as putting up a minor fight. Jesus Christ, Trevorrow, no wonder all of your movies suck.
49:09 for those who want it handy!
If they were going to power up Kylo, they should've just had him gaining strength through Dark Side lore and the damage he does - a Darksider can feed on that if I understand the lore. You could do even do it with fanservicey relics in his throne room and a "in my travels I have walked on Korriban/Rusaan/Mustafar" reference.
"He died the way he lived: wasting my time" is the absolute coldest line ever and I love it
It’s the kind of thing a Bond villain would say after shooting a minion who failed him.
When you finally win the boss battle after getting killed eight times:
timestamp?
@@sabianwatts8515 49:09
jenny would be an absolutely incredible supervillain we should be thankful she chose this path instead
hux didnt lose the star wars
because the real star wars were the friends we made along the way. that he also never had
So he never had the star wars to begin with, poor man
It was HUX! Hux was the child who’s father bought him a giant fake spider because he had no friends!!!! And then it disintegrated over time and now his character is driven by the bitterness of rejection and LOSS! O_O
SHREK NO
It's not that Hux sucks is just that those DON'T rhyme.
Hux is a Wanker
Leia: It's a shame, but there's nothing left to do about my son, you'll have to kill him
Rey: I believe there's still good in him
Leia (Louder): Yes, such a shame but there's nothing we can do!
Rey: No really I think I can bring him to-
Leia (Even louder): SUCH A TERRIBLE TRAGEDY, BUT I'M AFRAID THERE'S NO OTHER CHOICE!
LMFAO
Also Leia: "Come home, son"
Also Kylo: "okay mum"
I love this
Leia: Please kill my son, he is too cringe
If Carrie Fisher and Harrison Ford had a kid, would you expect anything better?
Jenny honestly "he died the way he lived: wasting my time" is a great villain line
How do I save a UA-cam comment
@@moredetonation3755 copy/paste in notepad, save the file with filename "he died the way he lived-wasting my time.txt"
@@moredetonation3755 or you can use print screen button found on your keyboard.
@@moredetonation3755 or you could use the snipping tool and take a screenshot if ur on pc or just press whatever buttons on your phone do that
@@moredetonation3755 We'll remind you every once in a while
Finn and Rose setting up a refuge for force sensitive children is unironically a better ending for both characters than what we actually got
Which was basically nothing
Yesss!!! That follows up their TLJ stuff so well!
……what was Rose’s finale? I don’t even remember her showing up except to say she had to do busy work 😅
@@devantesissenstein4714 too accurate 💀
@@devantesissenstein4714I’m pretty sure the last time she ever appears is celebrating that they won and then just vanishes
Time to find out if Jenny was actually a Palpatine this whole time
"you don't just have comedic timing. You have HIS comedic timing.
Jenny, you're a Palpatine."
What's a palpabletiny?
The dark side of the force is a pathway to many takes some consider to be unnatural.
Omg that made me snort lol!
She's AlL tHe SiTh
Hux trying to use the force every day, alone in his office was me as a kid after I saw Matilda tbh
Relatable villains
Who hasn’t wanted to dance on a table and psychically move all the objects around you in a crazy dance
It would have been a cool idea for the character if it had been established in the first movie rather than just in the final film, like ‘oh yeah this was always part of his arc’
Same except focusing chi and Kamehameha because Dragon Ball. I still try now and then because you never know for sure you're just not powerful enough yet.
@@ThatBoogieman @GGR Makes omfg, same. You still gotta go out of your way to try occasionally tho, just in case. The same as you check out weird things like sidewalk cracks and super reflective water and things that could definitely be portals to other magical worlds.
Screen writers shouldn't be afraid to put "snarky quip here" and let a dedicated snark master write that part
In-house snark isn't always efficient, sometimes you've gotta outsource. It's just going to be cheaper and better than re-inventing the wheel for every project.
That's a rare occurrence. Like Glover in Community. They trust him because they know he's genuinely funny
@@phoenixdzkYou're absolutely right about Donald Glover, but they don't have to wait for the actor to fill in the blank. Surely they can find *somebody* funny.
Rey losing to Ren and then being amped back up by the power of friendship only to just lose and die again is the funniest shit
I was cracking up at that too. I thought she’d find a way to circumvent the force sucking, maybe overwhelm him and burn him? But no, she dies twice LMFAO
If Hux had actually said "I lost the star wars." before killing himself it might have saved the whole thing... Probably not though.
They did, give or take, try this approach in the theatrical release with, "I'm the spy."
It was wildly, wildly entertaining but did ultimately prove your suspicions by dint of not saving anything.
Hux had like the most anticlimactic death ever--I burst out laughing at his death. Not saying I hated TROS, but that caught me off-guard and made me laugh XD
@@drakeredwingofficial The way his hair just fans around as he's shot made me burst into laughter in the middle of the cinema. I can't explain why, it's just so....it looked so goddamn silly lol
@@DeadKraken I know--it was an unintentionally hilarious scene
Bruh...hes my favorite character;-; and yall laughed at his death lol jk but he is I found th hat sad they completely wasted his character :/
I'm sure the Phantom Menace screenplay said "as the music begins to swell, the dark figure pulls back his hood to reveal a mass of horns; a head as spiky as a punk bracelet"
Gab Garde this comment made me fucking lose it
And it was probably written in different crayon colours.
"He is starting the Star Wars"
It’s so interesting to me with the foster/trevorrow/abrams treatments how every single person apparently watched episodes 7 and 8 and totally projected their own weird hang ups onto the same material. it’s like a rorschach test instead of cohesive storytelling
I still cannot believe that Lucasfilm didn't plan out all 3 movies, and instead let each movie be a reaction to the last
"projected their own weird hang ups onto the same material."
I think you just described part of the process of film analysis. If three different people watch a film, it stands to reason that they might come away with three different interpretations.
@@dapeach06/videos That would take actual effort and artistic responsibility.
Disney execs: "We don't do that here."
@@dapeach06 tbf that can work, witness the Dark Knight Trilogy (and a lot of the MCU is plainly improvised, hence Tony blows up all his suits in Iron Man 3 but then has even more come Age of Ultron). The problem is in the execution, that IX ends up flying in the face of the themes of VIII because the writers failed or refused to engage with them.
Kimmy Edie 7 was awful
I'm 100% imagining "ugly Kylo" as that guy from Beastly
Pretty gruesome, huh?
Omg 😭😂😂😂
@@bookshelfhoney I’ve seen worse :)
Literally laughed out loud, thanks 😆
Kylo Kingson
I was disappointed nobody in the script said "this is truly a duel of the fates"
I would have taken someone saying, just off-hand, "And now we duel with Fate"
"Truly, we are fighting a Star Wars Episode 9: Duel of the Fates."
She truly is a rogue one
In a last ditch attempt, Kylo Ren attacks our heroes with menacing phantoms.
“Let the duel of the fates begin”
loved the makeover segment where rey puts down her hair and takes off her glasses
As Girls Just Wanna Have Fun plays in the background
She’s all that(s left of the jedi)
@@oldschool3424 I was actually picturing Material Girl
@@oldschool3424 I imagined an alien-disco instrumental (and for some reason, she's chewing bubble gum)
Maybe I'm biased, but there was more romantic tension in "Trapped in an island with Josh Hutcherson" than there is between Rey and Poe.
Of course there was! How could Rey and Poe possibly match the masterpiece-level writing that was Trapped in A Island With Josh Hutcherson?
I’m still reeling from Trapped In A Island With Jenny Nicholson
@@thisisbetterthanmyprevious6674 Bro
@@yeethittter1285 You killed them bro 😔
@@thisisbetterthanmyprevious6674 Bro bro don't snitch 😠
Jenny: "No-one makes their password the date of christmas."
Entire nation of Aldovia: "Ummmm.... yeah."
I think it’s a royal mandate there
Great crossover 10/10
this sounds like a cool funny reference but i can't find what exactly it's referencing
@@blubboiii7706 it's a reference to her Christmas Prince review
No wonder they had that economic crisis.
I hate that every version of episode nine backtracks on Rey’s parentage. Like, let her be a nobody. THAT’S THE POINT. Some kid who had a rough childhood can still grow up to be a good person who does great things.
^ T H I S ^
Especially since while people rarely have family that were tragically murdered to protect them or be decended from evil overlords, many people, as unfortunate as it is, have parents where were normal, shitty, neglectful people. No grand dark mystery, just assholes. Having Rey come from that sort background would not only be better for the story but would resonate with a lot of people, and it's honestly sad that the writers didn't think that was a story worth telling.
Well... Rian Johnson thought that was worth telling
Yes but this is the Skywalker saga. I don't know, from my point of view everything should be related to Anakin
I hope that writing a good Episode Nine is just an unsolvable problem because if not it means the best that Hollywood’s “top screenwriting talent” could manage are all awful in their own special ways.
I truly hate Poe and Rey being shoved together here, but TRoS stripped Finn of any agency or character outside of her. Finn deserved better.
I was always a shipper of Fin and Rey!
Maybe with Poe and Rose both having an unrequited crush on Fin.
Rey and Kylo is cringy and Rey and Poe is just "What!?".
Finn's arc should have been him going from Trooper to Rebel, but in TFA that happens in 5 minutes and he kills his former comrades without a second thought.
Phasma should have been Finn's mentor, adding tension to their conflicting paths.
i'd argue finn's character was ruined the second j.j. had him shoot his fellow soldiers without a second thought. that moment basically solidified that the whole defecting stormtrooper thing was a superficial attempt to distinguish him from the other new characters. having finn lead a stormtrooper rebellion after all that would be kinda uncomfortable.
These screenwriters not knowing what to do with characters who are not in a romantic relationship is a big woof.
Finn deserves better than Rey.
Jenny: "It's really annoying to read a screenplay as a single person."
Meanwhile BB is waiting the whole episode for her to turn around so he can confess his love.
“i don’t want to have to give dialogue tags” changes hats between every line lol
I hope this video ends with BB-8 beeping out "I'll never understand organics".
"A pair of blue eyes snap open. Leia" Carrie Fisher had brown eyes lol. So does Adam Driver, Finn Boyega, Oscar Isaac and to an extent Daisy Ridley. I almost feel that it's kind of insulting for Trevorrow to apparently assume the beautiful princess has blue eyes.
This has nothing really to do with what you said but I'm giggling at Finn Boyega
@@karinmaria6455 haha oops! Well if the shoe fits I guess. I'll just leave it there
the Night King turned her from a Skywalker into a white walker
Such a clear sign that he didn't really know what he was talking about
There's a few things that sound racially problematic in this, from assuming the princess has perfect blue eyes, to making Rey put on a Sari in a Middle-Eastern inspired area "full of freaks" to make Poe see her "exotic beauty", on top of the complete dumping of Finn & Rose from the main plot to focus on the most marketable leads to force into a relationship.
It all feels really icky just how unapologetically shameless the script is in trying to whitewash the main cast (and making Poe the cliché bad boy because he too isn't white).
If only there was a word that meant "throne-like chair."
Thrair
@@h3adcrabbio toilet
@@RebelCannonClub74 A throne of kings
Almost all of Star Wars is fanfic at this point.
Perhaps it could be found in a throne room.
"-staring at her just as Chewbacca was throwing him a wrench"
I like to think that the wrench hit Poe in the head, killing him instantly and mercifully freeing him from this godawful script
And, perhaps more importantly, freeing Rey from his advances.
These poor characters. I love them, but they just can't catch a break
I like to imagine some of Hux’s coworkers faking a reaction when he tries using the force just to make him feel better
awww stop, I already struggel so much to take the poor guy seriously. Now I feel even more bad for him :(
Aww gee, boss. You sure are force choking me.
*Coughs unenthusiastically*
It’s just a stormtrooper under the table with a magnet
he looks like a coke feind💀
I am imagining it as a comedy skit where the whole thing is a metaphor for a couple having lame sex.
Hux: "Feel my power!"
Underling: "Ack! Oh god! Ahhh!"
Hux: "... you're faking it, aren't you?"
Underling: "N-no...!"
Hux: "You are. I've seen how you react when *Ren* force chokes you."
I liked the part when Rey ghosted Poe by literally becoming a force ghost. It's not very good, but it's an effective way to stop their romance.
The real poe was killed after episode 7 that one was an imposter
"I've heard of being ghosted but this is ridiculous" *laugh track*
Im-poe-ster
That’s gotta hurt Poe’s ego a bit 😂
The rebel fleet are struggling against palpatine’s star destroyers. They’re badly outnumbered.
But then
Ships begin to warp in, one, two, a dozen, two dozen, soon hundreds arrive. The rebel’s call to arms has been answered.
“You mess with one of us, you mess with all of us!”
Someone needs to say, "they won the star wars," in a Star Wars movie so that in the following movie someone can say, "you may have won the star battle, but not the star war."
Ghost Luke: I can’t help but notice Rei, that you don’t appear to be wearing your standard issue Jedi chastity belt...”
Kylo would NEVER refer to Vader as “Anakin Skywalker.” Ever. “Anakin Skywalker” is his Jedi name. “Darth Vader” is the version of Anakin Kylo looked up to, and referring to him as Anakin instead of Vader implies that Kylo’s descended from the Skywalkers. An identity he’s trying to distance himself from. Trevorrow didn’t understand any of the characters
This reminds me of Count Dooku who has the BEST sith lord name and yet nobody refers to him as Darth Tyrannus 😂
He must have felt so fucking cool when he came up with that and everyone just went ...nah well just call you Dooku.
@@Picking.a.name.is.hard1 I believe they didn't know Dooku's Sith name was Tyranus until Season 6 of The Clone Wars
@@unknownexerpt4724 Sidious calls him that in Episode II.
@@jonathanlgill Yes but they didn't know Tyrannus and Dooku are the same until much later in the clone wars. I think. It's been a while
Please don’t take this the wrong way but this reminds me of a TikTok I saw of someone calling out transphobic Star Wars fans for insisting that people not deadname Darth Vader but refusing to respect the wishes of people in the real world.
I know literally none of that is what you’re talking about it’s just something that entered my mind
Honestly just start comparing everything to punk clothing.
The tower was taller than punk boots.
The night was darker than punk lipstick.
See? powerful.
Like, it’s a ridiculous line, but I can’t say it wasn’t effective in describing the visual.
Their attitude was more punk than punk
The light shined brighter than a silver studded punk belt
I want to add this to my vocabulary like patches on a punk jacket
Finn shouts 'REY!!!' like a punk chorus.
The concept of Rey having a makeover montage with Poe being the judge makes me smile every time. It's like a teen comedy where Rey is the protagonist trying to impress a guy and Poe is the gay best friend.
Stormpilot or not, Poe as Rey's gay wingman is infinitely more believable than this romance arc.
@@blokey8 Poe as Rey's gay wingman, but he's dating Finn and Rey is trying to woo Kylo
@@aswarmofcrabs Honestly, if we were to have Rey still being interested in Kylo, it should be after he's shown there's still good in him. The reveal that she had been pining while he was Supreme Leader really stuck in the craw for me.
@@aswarmofcrabs I'll do ya one better: they're both dating Finn, but not each other. ReyFinnPoe 4thewin. Kylo... he can stay if he actually redeens himself, which he kinda started to do in VII but certainly didn't finish doing in IX. Honestly I think it'd be hilarious if he redeems himself so hard he adopts prequel-era jedi doctrine, so he's voluntarily celibate like. Well good thing you found a less destructive path I guess
@@aswarmofcrabs hell yeah!
any one else a little peeved that the script said leia's eyes were blue, when carrie fisher's eyes were DEFINITELY brown
So are Adam Drivers. So I was very confused who they were referring too in that scene.
The moment I heard that I had to scroll down to the comments to see if it jumped out at anyone else lol
Hannah Raquel I thought I was the only one that was like ???? I can’t believe Jenny didn’t notice that! Carrie’s big brown doe-eyes were one of her most distinguishing features!
@@SimmerRose It's also one of the reasons why casting Adam Driver as her son was such a good move imo because he has a bit of the same doe-eyed quality combined with Harrison's longer facial shape. And drawing attention to that would make sense for the scene since it's cutting from him to her but guess not lol
Liquid Pig exactly! I’ve been thinking that about Adam since TFA! But yeah I guess Trevorrow is either blind or has little to no object permanence
I recently adopted a cat, and I was showing him some YT videos of other cats. He watched enthralled. I decided to show him this video, and he also watched enthralled. He has no knowledge of any Star Wars property, so I think you can consider him a fan not of your content, but of your presentation. If he ever runs away and shows up at your door, his name is Robert and he likes cat treats quite a lot.
this was just really cute to read so thank you for sharing your robert’s yt opinions
My cat also enjoyed parts of the video, especially when Jenny was portraying the octopus guy lol
@thatlycantomboy
"your robert" lmao
"this is my robert! there are many like it but this one is mine!"
can we get the jenny cut of all Star Wars movies where she apathetically narrates the dialogue
Or alternatively where she plays every character and is just sort of photoshopped into various landscapes
ua-cam.com/video/G0JxmyTwY7s/v-deo.html You mean like this?
“You’re a palpatine” although honestly it probably wouldn’t sound any different
Jenny leaned into these lines WAY more than she needed to, lol.
Jenny could do the "audio description" tracks they make for deaf people.
WE DID IT BOYS.
WE LOST THE STAR WARS
BUT WE MADE THE FRIENDS ALONG THE WAY
Maybe the real Star Wars was the friends we made along the way.
@@commandercaptain4664 THE REAL STAR WARS WAS INSIDE US ALL ALONG
THE STAR WARS IS NO MORE
Full respect to the fact that both Abrams and Trevorrow find the idea of extreme poverty so unrelatable that they couldn't imagine a protagonist whose pauper parents could sell her for money they spent on alcohol, and just wrote that plot point out.
They can't imagine not having great parents. But the reality is that there are neglectful or abusive parents all around
It’s weird people fixated on Rey’s parents so much, the impression I got was that she was deluding herself into thinking they would come back for her when it was pretty obvious they abandoned her from the word go.
Rey Nobody was a mystery box
JJ wanted to save the true reveal of Rey’s background for the final installment
Rey being Han and Leias daughter was on the table; Rey was based on the character Kira Solo from George’s draft
Of course nothing was set in stone, however Rian needed some kind of “I am your father” moment and Rey Nobody was the only one that was retractable depending on what the following filmmaker wanted to do
Remember: Rian could have shown Rey’s parents in the cave vision but he didn’t. He could have had their names/surnames mentioned but he didn’t. And we could have seen the flashback of Reys parents dumping her on Jakku in TLJ but we didn’t. Last but not least Kylo ren despite being a bargain basement Darth Vader has somewhat of a reason to lie as he wants her to join him
Anyway see Star Wars Apocrypha by Nerdnonymous
The moral is when George Lucas hands you a story for the sequel trilogy then THAT is the story of the sequel trilogy
@@KRobinson-ko1neI get what you’re saying but Rian DID give us an answer, most people just weren’t happy with it. I am sad that JJ felt the need to say Rian’s answer wasn’t good enough.
@@KRobinson-ko1ne Rian didn't show Rey's parents in the cave vision because it was about Rey's fear that she's truly alone, her parents did in fact abandon her and she has no one but herself. And he didn't show them leaving or give them names because they fundamentally do not matter to the story he was telling.
I know there are worse parts, but "Tell me the odds, I like numbers" is what got me. I almost fell out of my chair.
It's really such a choice that basically the only development of Rose, the only Asian character in the movie, is to have her voice a love of numbers
i forgot this was a part of the script and upon reading this comment laughed so hard i could barely breathe for like a full minute remembering both the line and jennys absolute incredulity upon reading it. its like asking someone to show you a map to a location you need to find because you Like Shapes. who says this
@@butterknifepatten4455 It's there to be the awkward opposite of Han's "never tell me the odds".
So glad I live in the day and age where I can confidently say I’ve heard the line, “He lost the star wars.”
I desperately want this to start a trend of screenwriters attempting to write their version of episode IX. If only so we can have Jenny read the results of Hollywood’s finest dashing themselves against the rocks.
and hey, if we are lucky that might actually result in a good screenplay at some point lül^^
datz fatz my money is on Wes Anderson being able to pull it off well.
I'd write one better than JJ Abrams
Tareltonlives wouldn’t be much of a miracle. i’m not doubting your skill, but that’s not much of a challenge to pull off.
@@mayhemivory5730 LOL That is absolutely true. It's easy to top JJ Abrams' writing
I'm now imagining Obi-Wan's force ghost hanging around Darth Vader to passive-aggressively mock his life choices
that would be lowkey great, please make a sitcom where that's a thing
@@liaspooked4980 It would have to be like Perfect Strangers and Obi Wan is the over the top one because he's a ghost and no one but Vader can see him.
Oh my god I want it
that could've been a comedy
Every time he force-chokes somebody, Obi Wan doesn’t say anything, but he floats into Vader’s eyeline with a
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)-vader is too afraid to ask so he just gets a little uncomfortable every time it happens
I now feel uncomfortably aware of not only what type of person Colin Trevorrow is, but also what type of person he THINKS he is
He’s basically just Michael Bay with a little more self restraint.
You get that experience with everything he writes, it feels like. I had this EXACT same epiphany when I watched "The Book of Henry" 🤣
The man writes characters he thinks are likeable, but since they're based on his own sense of what that word means, they're kind of terrible.
@@BallinBubblegum It's honestly hard to say he has more self restraint. I make a rule of not assuming things about artists' personalities based on their work (that's how you get people who don't believe Shakespeare was Shakespeare because he never taught his wife to read when the simpler answer is that, you know, he was busy, she wasn't super-interested and he just didn't believe in the transcendent glory of the written word as much as some people assume based on his works enough to push it) but, when you can see the director's notes, even I have a little trouble sticking to that given how much he seems to wear his worldview on his sleeve. At the very least, you can say that he's consistent in the kinds of decisions he makes in his writing and that _might_ speak to his character.
Michael Bay, on the other hand, ultimately just makes products to sell to target demographics (generally very successfully, for better or worse). For all that his movies idolise the US military and US patriotism, he did (allegedly - it's possible the actor misremembered or made it up) refuse to use an ad-libbed joke in one of the Transformers movies with his cited reason being that, "it wouldn't play in China."
@@Pineappolis"the transcendent glory of the written word" doesn't seem like it was Shakespeare's own perspective of his work but just how people perceived it in hindsight. I think people pay more attention to the cultural gravitas of Shakespeare's work rather than the work itself when they try to extrapolate Shakespeare's character. I think solely looking at his work would give people a more accurate idea.
@@arowace498 Excellent point. I was going for my own rhetorical device where I wrote in the 'voice' of the kinds of people I'm talking about but, crucially, I forgot the sardonic quotation marks.
I took a short nap in the middle and woke up around the 40 minutes mark to Jenny wiggling her arms and making an octopus impression and I feel like I missed an important plot point of the movie.
Also side note. I agree, Jenny. Rey needed a full 80s style makeover montage!
For all the UA-cam channels I watch, this one has the most octopus impressions.
Read this while she was doing it, showstopping
Nope.
@@Chipiliro613 As opposed to Vlogbrothers, the channel with the most Squid impressions.
lmaooooo jenny is on FIRE today
"he died as he lived: WASTING MY TIME"
"allow me to look at this whole script with a look that could be perceived as disappointment"
Maybe my favorite Jenny line ever. It’s like she’s in a Bond movie.
Time code for the first line P L E A S E
also "they liked that ending. must be nice"
@@thehonorablereverendaddiso1943 49:08 :]
@@mori2037 Thank you!
I feel like all of Poe's character traits and personality were just replaced with:
"Horny"
He certainly had a mildly horny energy in the force awakens but that was towards Finn and made sense
@@hellformichelle EXACTLY.
Stormpilot should be canon.
It's the only way that Trevorrow knows how to write a leading man. Plus "condescending."
@@hellformichelle I keep meaning to do some digging on this subject but was this (Poe possibly being into Finn in TFA) widely discussed before Oscar Isaacs mentioned it in the run-up to RoS? I remember asking a few people, back when TFA first came out, whether they got that impression or whether they thought he was just being directed to act as such a charismatic 'Ace Rimmer' type that he would come across as at least vaguely flirtatious with anyone he spoke to whether the intention was there or not. Responses were noncommittal at best, though, so I figured I was just imagining things.
@Han Organa Awesome, thanks for the information - as I say, I always wondered. I have to say I'm seriously impressed by Oscar Isaac's acting, that being the case, because I'm typically pretty oblivious to romantic chemistry in media unless it's heavily telegraphed in the film language or outright stated in the text itself. To get me to register it purely through nuance of performance in a couple of short scenes that had so much else going on takes some talent. From John Boyega too, obviously, but I feel like it's a much more common talking point that he gave a stellar performance in TFA than Isaacs (largely due to the difference in screen time, I guess).
Colin deciding to make poe a creepy heterosexual is the most horrific and hilarious thing
This is creepy bisexual erasure and I won't stand for it.
I don't why my brain immediately thought of the song "Sweet Transvestite" from Rocky Horror Picture Show but as "Creepy Heterosexual" instead, but here we are
And so predictable...
Dude really just did a cursory glance over the cast and decided that Oscar Isaac resembled Chris Pratt the most and did what he does best/worst 💀
@@PerpetuallyDaydreaming they’re all in blue short sleeve button ups and khakis, and it’s a room full of people who’re worried about dancing “too gay”
It’s artwork
As a student filmmaker, should I put “YOU MESS WID WON OF US YOU MESS WID ALL OF US” in every scene I direct?
just hope you learnt after watch Disney star wars how not to make a movie.
yes
Marina p I have images of De Niro at the Oscars just going “and Best Picture goes to YOU MESS WID WON OF US YOU MESS WID ALL OF US: The Movie”
@Lord Renek Gamer Always have a plan.
oh, yes~
If Jenny did one of those "taking a picture every day for a year" things it would just be her in her room and the only thing that would change would be her hats
But they all just stack up on one another like with the Vader hat on top of the bucket hat, and at the end of the year it's some Seussian stack of hats.
I’m glad this movie never got made because honestly I cannot imagine any other person playing Torvalum now I’ve seen Jenny’s Oscar worthy performance
1:02:37 "Is this to just tell us that Kylo Ren is not jacked in real life?"
Um, excuse you, a buddy of mine saw Kylo Ren take his shirt off in the shower and he said that Kylo Ren had an 8-pack. That Kylo Ren was shredded.
I love the implication in this comment that Kylo Ren does not remove his clothing until he is physically already inside a (choosing to extrapolate here for the comedy) already turned on shower, v funny imagery that also fits more with his characterisation than some things in these various script treatments
I like to imagine that Luke shows up to the dojo with a bad 90s abstinence only sex ed video and 90% of Rey’s training is abstinence only sex education.
Weirdly, a significant portion of sith training is a comprehensive guide to contraceptives.
@@nerdherder9340 wow the Jedi really were the bad guys
And she's like "how come the boys are in the other gym learning light sabres?"
@@emilytrace3670 Luke replies very irritably “well my dad DIDN’T see the tape before the lightsaber training and we both know how that went.”
With Hux being a huge Jedi fanboy, it would have been a hilarious twist if he overcame the force-power-barrier, gained absurd power, killed Kylo, and then fought Rey. Just because.
Okay but why would that lowkey save it in a way. Then like Kylo still gets redemption and we get to see him fight along side Rey and maybe if they love the force healing so much use it there. Like rey is down in battle and kylo puts in the finishing blow to his rival and maybe bring like luke and leia back to be like look son/nephew we are not disappointed in you anymore and believe you can be redeemed after all. There could even be some snarky back and forth, allowing redeemed kylo to actually have dialogue and then heals rey and dies again. Still weird screen play but like it's something interesting and a choice. Still think episode 9 was just kinda fated to fail since there was a lot riding on it.
@@zane8605 ight dat kinda didnt rly have much to do with hux...tbh idc I just love general hux,my fav character lol.
"I like numbers." Wow, rose really got the short end of the stick in terms of dialogue here, huh.
Still more dialogue than what she got in Rise of Skywalker
Tbf, in the full script she's got some pretty fucking great lines
I think her asking C3PO for the odds was supposed to be a clever(?) homage to Han telling him "never tell me the odds!". "I like numbers" was just awful dialog to avoid making it too obvious. Which is silly considering all the other blatant call-backs and fan-service
Of course it's the one Asian character who likes numbers...
Bard W. At least she’s not a doctor too
I like the idea of Tor Vallum being the antithesis of Yoda - an ancient Sith master who similarly hangs out in bogs making wisecrack remarks
tor vallum is quite literally the only good thing about this script i want him inserted into star wars canon right now
I think it's enhanced by Jenny's Hermaeus Mora impression tbh lmao
Rey, Finn and Poe deserved a better trilogy. They had so much potential and despite the mess, I still actually like them. It makes me so sad that there was basically nothing good by the end of it all. It's so tragic.
Platypus Mode lmao NO they were terrible characters and terrible actors hack frauds
@@BagzAndPresident how
@@BagzAndPresident No they were good actors Im sure, thats how they got the job. Its the script they were put in that was awful just like how hayden christiensen was given a mediocre script but was still a talented actor nonetheless. you cant go blaming actors for their scripts that the writers wrote
Tragic? That's nothing! Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise?
(okay but really, I agree with you. so much potential wasted)
Platypus Mode The whole trilogy should’ve been better, it doesn’t stand out as its own. A lot of fanboys hate it because of pretty petty reasons but I feel like the entire trilogy is a waste of potential. It relied too much on the original trilogy and it’s characters that it didn’t let it be it’s own thing(TROS is a huge example of this). TLJ is the best because it doesn’t feel like a rehash. TFA feels like ANH retreaded and TROS does the same with ROTJ but worse. It pandered to an audience that ended up hating it anyway.
ADMIRAL VONN: Lord Ren, your popcorn is ready.
[HATTASKA REN decapitates ADMIRAL VONN with his DARKSABER]
REN: I forgot to ask for butter.
REN: DON'T YOU KNOW I USUALLY BURN MY TONGUE WHEN I EAT IT IMMEDIATELY!
What’s funnier to me than both versions of RoS having force sucking is that so does Black Moon Rising
😳 OH MY GOD--
*do you think they might've actually read it...?*
I'm just sitting here wondering if I'm thinking about the right kind of force sucking.. ...
@@TheWeeklyFangirl I'm pretty sure they read everything they could that was even remotely Star Wars related to try and right the ship. We all know how that worked out.
Blackmoon Rising was the stealth RoS script we never knew we needed.
"Fly to a planet where there are pigs in abundance" is rarely used as the solution to mystical curses, and frankly, that's disappointing.
It sounds more like a curse itself. A more creative form of Go Fuck Yourself
It just made me think "Earth" and how much I hated the end of Animal Farm and then feel bad for pigs and having to internally apologize for letting the analogy taint my view. Pigs are amazing. Pigs are so much more empathetic than humans that many groups are now saying it is unethical to use them as therapy pets because they feel more deeply than we do.
@@alienatedlibrarian5017have you been on a farm before? Pigs are cool and def can be great pets but they aren’t some transcendent and emotionally superior animal either
As someone who hasn’t finished the video yet and don’t know much about this series, I am so confused right now
@@bcc5701they mean pigs are cute and humans are not. I alone know the expetions
Me: sitting here wondering why Jenny Nicholson hasn't released a new video in a while
Jenny: *is trying on different hats and editing together a miniature one woman play*
1 month later, this cycle repeats itself
@@Flowtail 1 month later the cycle repeats itself yet again.
Max Strand well shit here’s hoping i get replies to this until the end of time
@@Flowtail lol
@@Flowtail I decided to give the video a thumbs up at "decided to solve this problem by wearing MANY hats," and then looked for a place to post saying that I did.
Not sure what's worse, sidelining Rose entirely or giving her the line "tell me the odds, I like numbers".
Also why did both versions of IX want to retcon her parents being terrible people. Why did neither writer just leave it alone.
Because the whole sequel trilogy is a joke without a single person's creative vision as a guide
If you check out the whole script, Rose has a decent amount to do in the B-team stuff that Jenny skipped over with the Jedi Temple transmitter
I think she would have been better off with the horrible dialogue, ‘cause at least then she would have some ironic fans. The way things are, her existence is just pathetic.
For real
I actually thought a better version of that line would be pretty cool.
Rose leaps into her fighter, pressing buttons and saying "Threepio tell me the odds."
Threepio tells her the odds
She sneers "Just how I like em." Or some badass or quirky snark like that.
I wish they'd elaborated more on what a freak show in the Star Wars universe would even entail. "Behold! A Gormulax with eleven arms, instead of the usual nine!"
Or maybe the big attraction would be like a suburban dad with a sweater vest. WEIRD!
"Behold, a Galllifreyan Time Lord! And this they call a Hobbit, nay... THE HOBBIT! Over here is the jewel, the creme of the creme... oh yes, good brothers and sisters, its... the only Episode IX script that is actually filmmable!"
This here is a creature called a Golden Retriever! It has - count them - FOUR limbs! It can smell treats from a mile away!
The real freak show were these half-baked Episode IX scripts.
@@BenjaminWhitley The real real freak show are the friends we made along the way
Imagine if right after Hux stabbed himself with the lightsaber, reaching out in pain, he managed to move an object with the force.
It’s a pot that immediately slams into his face. And he dies
That would actually be cool. Honestly that whole scene already IS super cool. I just have a thing for characters realising they've lost and ending it on their own terms. It shows strength.
@@Nalimias i think it shows unwillingness to face the fallout and consequences, especially when they;re the "bad guy"
@@fr4nkensk4nkcould look at it that way too, but there definitely is some stoic badassery to it, true coward always protects their life at all costs
@@Nalimias maybe it's because i've struggled with depression and suicidal thoughts since i was 12 but i just dont see it that way
"And also bizarre that there are apparently versions of the script pairing Rey with every lead man except for Finn. Was that option just never on the table? And if not, hmn! I wonder why not? What's different about Finn?"
THE SHADE
They'd have to shrink Finn's face even smaller if he was a love interest in China
@@mrman6035 Can we just ban China?
@@mrman6035 The poster is Rey and Finn kissing (spoiler alert) except he's so small he's holding onto her lower lip.
Also, fun fact, the biggest movie ever released in China came out the same year that TFA shrank Boyega's face, it was Fast and Furious 7, it had a mostly-black cast, and everyone's face was equally sized on the posters. That was Disney making an executive decision to hide Finn, not China.
Diversity?
It’s strange to because I felt like Finn and Rey were set up to possibly be couple in TFA. I guess the filmmakers thought it better to be in an abusive relationship than with a Black man.
The fact that, across these 3 alternate versions of episode 9 we have, Rey is pined after by Poe, a guy she works with whom she has no chemistry with, and also by goddamn c3po, without either of these authors ever considering pairing her with Finn is goddamn hilarious. Threepio is just too irresistible
What was the third?
@@RexOrbis the actual episode 9 I guess?
@@carysbebard3690 list them?
Rex Orbis the released version, the version in this video, and presumably the pitched version from Jenny’s video two videos prior to this one.
Brain Genius Academy precisely!
I can't believe someone actually wrote "he lost the star wars" in a serious way.
"When you play the game of thrones, you win or you die. There is no middle ground."
@@danielmclaughlin5546 "When you sing the song of Ice and Fire or play the Game of Thrones: The officially licensed browser game, you win or you die. Many geods available."
Senna Asad sponsored by Raid: Shadow Legends
Mfw my boy looses the star war
Maybe it was supposed to be self-referential?
the whole "guy teases girl who's just all business but she secretly likes it" trope would be less obnoxious and gross if he knew how to write a funny woman. like if claire from jurassic park had been sarcastic and goofy back at him or if rey had been silly with poe i wouldn't be going "UUUUGH" about it
“I would have liked to see you write mutual banter between two bonding friends in a wartime situation, instead of grimy workplace sexual harassment citations”
“What do you mean? It’s flirty and fun? She’s clearly into it by not responding more than she has to”
“Oh No”
am just imagining a dynamic where goofy character A just doesnt understand sarcasm and "serious" character B doesnt get the humour in goof. both are thinking theyre trying to tease the other and get mildly annoyed the attempts dont seem to bear any fruits. idiots to lovers.
@@cigaretteparfumI believe they called it “Much Ado About Nothing”
So.....Han and Leia?
“YOU MESS WID ONE OF US YOU MESS WID AALLLL OF US” -Rey
I feel like that was the working title but she needs to appease the algorithm.
"NEW YAWKERS STICK TOGETHER!"
Spiderman! Spiderman!
"I think it is difficult to do an actively bad opening crawl"
You could always start with "The dead speak!"
The dark side of the force is a pathway to many opening text crawls that some may consider....u n n a t u r a l
Or, the classic War! - I shat my pants laughing at that one
@@JRA6192 I’m exactly of the same mindset. Star Wars has always been a little cheesy, rightfully so as it’s partially inspired by Flash Gordon.
It’s so tacky I loved it !!!
@@JRA6192 I wouldn't criticize it for being too cheesy, but for dropping such a critical, world-changing plot point as "BTW Emperor Palpatine is back" in the opening crawl. That's the sort of thing that should go in the second movie of a trilogy rather than the opening crawl of the third...and if you didn't get to make the second movie, maybe you shouldn't just run with your original idea for a trilogy finale anyways.
"Tell me the odds 3PO. I like numbers." might be my favourite horrible line.
- the only Asian character in SW
"Never tell me the odds"
The only way to save this line would be to play it like it's the character being inarticulate, not the writer being a dumbass. Like something Joss Whedon would write.
I need to make an informed decision, Threepio. Always tell me the odds!
@@DStecks "i do like me some numbers" she says nervously
almost everything about this script is like…really, really awful, but the ending with finn and rose running a sanctuary for baby force sensitives is so good and perfect i could cry. woah.
Maybe with a few rewrites and revisions this script could've been good
@@janjanbinks1710 I honestly feel like this version has the most to go off of to make an actually good version of episode 9. Scrap creepy workplace harasser Poe and give Kylo Ren some like actual motivations instead of “his face is gross ew” and you have like a halfway decent movie. At the very least it would be better than any version utilizing the structure of Rise of Skywalker lmao.
@@pexilated1638 literally nothing about kylo arc is good why would his mom donest care and even ask him to d!e to save rey why would he even do that cuz in this ver he doesnt even love her just soooo bad and why is luke chosen rey side out of nowhere she wasnt trying to save the world
@@ryochan9438 I’m not saying the Trevorrow script wholesale is *good,* it’s still dumb af and riddled with plotholes. It would need a lot of work to make it good, but at the very least it does not contain the phrase “somehow palpatine has returned” which already puts it at least one notch above Rise of Skywalker
"I lost the star wars" said Kylo Ren, before committing Sithpukku
pulling a war minister Anami
I'M FUCKING DEAD
SITHPUKKU
I'M SOBBING, LIKE ACTUALLY SOBBING, WHY THE FUCK WAS THAT SO GOOD LMAO
Rest In Pieces Kylo-kun…….
Okay but why does Jenny deliver Kylo Ren’s lines EXACTLY like Adam Driver would it’s so spot on
She really nailed that like... miserable and obsessive psychopath expression, as well as the inflection, of Kylo Ren.
She's watched Episodes 7 + 8 a loooooooooootttt of times. Like, a LOT of times. She's pretty much memorized large sections of the films, especially Kylo Ren 'cause she likes his character a lot. :D
I can hear his almost-accent so well.
I love how it’s obvious Trevorrow felt that his Poe/Rey ship was threatened by Kylo Ren and, consequently, felt the need to turn him into an uggo.
As opposed to Rey just going "you're a murderous dictator and that's a dealbreaker for me." Like, that's a viable stance.
Alec Ferris 😐 .... I honestly don’t wanna have this debate, but once again I think there’s a reason why Colin felt so threatened by Reylo...
@@etherealsky7078 I suspect you may be onto something, if you look at his Jurassic World work he appears to have a weird... thing about alpha male types.
My point was just that Rey already has ample reason to reject Kylo, based solely on him choosing to be the tyrant. And it's weird that Trevorrow didn't simply go with that.
Alec Ferris Once again, I know a lot of people desperately want Rey to not be with Kylo... But whether you like it or not, when there’s a whole movie building up to their relationship (TLJ) and another riddled with hints about it (TFA), it feels very cheap to discard it last minute in the third movie.
Alec Ferris Oh Colin definitely has a type for macho, dudebro males... He writes romances like they’re from a bad 80s action movie...
Rose saying, "I like numbers," was so bad that it gave me Sith face cancer.
Admiral Vaughn: *dies*
Jenny: this popcorn is so good, it makes me want to move my head like Remy from Ratatouille when he eats fine cheese
I had to take a full moment to stop and ponder "He lost the star wars."
Kylo Ren: *beats Rey, then kills himself out of regret*
Everyone: YAY REY SAVED THE GALAXY
"her sight is restored" oh cool it's that trope where you make a main character disabled for like a minute and then magically heal them. cool
Pretty much
When will a main character get stabbed with a space weapon that gives them 48 hours of lactose intolerance
“That’s how I got my autism, a space wizard came into my childhood home on Halloween, and in his attempts to defeat my ultimate form (an unarmed human baby) he accidentally granted me power immaterial. So far it has not gone away. The government won’t tell you” u can’t say that
Blind Jedi are cool, too! I mean, they could make pretty much _any_ physical disability really cool with the force, but something about a blindfolded Jedi getting around like a force-sensitive Toph is just really cool.
Or have the only character who gets their limb cut/ripped off be the person who can regrow limbs.
Ah my favorite Kylo Ren quote, "This is noisy, I can hear it crinkling in my ears"
Best line of the screenplay to be honest
kylo autistic confirmed
@@changelingsys yes
I feel like this is a real Adam Driver quote.
A worthy successor to Anakin's sand speech
Poe couldn’t take the Friend Zone hint so Rey had to resort to Dead Zoning him.
Garlic Jr., nooo!
That shirt be like:
"My name is Rey...
Rey Star Wars"
Rey Star Wars! From the film- Star Wars!
Star Wars: Episode IX: Rise of Star Wars
Scott Brown Star Wars: Episode Star Wars: The Star Wars
Anyone know where I can get that shirt?
@@ThreadBomb Good find thank you
“If Rey is a Skywalker”: Denial
“Star Wars Episode IX Bingo”: Bargaining
“I Read the Terrible Episode IX Pitch Where Rey is a Robot”: Anger
“Oh No! The Rise of Skywalker was Real Bad :(“: Depression
“Well. Let’s Read Colin Trevorrow’s Episode IX Script”: Acceptance
Kubler-Ross would be proud.
Oh my god
Why do the nights of ren have the same dynamic as the ouran high school host club all there missing is the boy Lolita
Obsidian Valentine 😭😭😭😂😂😂 bruh
well that's the role kylo filled
@@Paraves426 did you just-
Kylo = Kyouya. Headcanon ACCEPTED
*chef's kiss~* 😗👌
Hux absentmindedly runs his fingers through his Suspiciously Silvering hair before once again reaching out to the vintage lightsaber. Face twisting with effort, sweat dripping from his brow. Yet it refuses him, just like every attempt before. His spirits fall with his hand. Deep down he knows he will never be the Grey Jedi that Jenny wanted to see in this franchise.
Hahaha! Better writing for that moment than the actual screenplay. Nice!
I love how there's a romance for Rey and Poe... when the two, prior to The Rise of Skywalker, literally hadn't said a word to each other.
They said at least two in The Last Jedi.
@@Dagenspear oh, my mistake. Cue the wedding then
@@Fuzzy_Barbarian No, you don't get it! They made eye contact and everything! OTP! OTP! OTP!
Yeah, the Rise of Skywalker back-and-forth with them complaining about the other damaging the Falcon/BB-8 made a lot more sense than... this Yikes-O-Rama.
Honestly it just makes it feel like such a fanfic to me. Like after the insane amount of romantic tension between Rey and Kyle in episode, the idea that Poe is the one pursuing Rey in this script is so absurd to me
How did everyone here sleep on the cut to Poe when Luke’s says the force “penetrates” us. That’s a “we lost the star war” tier moment.
Poe gets force-pegged
It kinda feels more like he wanted to write a romantic comedy roadtrip fanfic with rey and poe but he also had this hux and kylo angst fic he was pretty proud of and just fused them together, it doesn't feel like an actual star wars movie in the slightest.
Splitting up the gang is a large part of that, I think. I appreciate what he was trying to do, but it would seem more fitting to have Rey fight her final battle alongside her friends. And for Kylo to meet his end on the battlefield, with the whole Resistance looking on.
I hit “like” after I heard “many hats.”
Luke's hat is the best.
The bit with Jurassic World using the "lover's trick" to confuse a velociraptor is gold.
I’m so confused by every word of this sentence... what is this a reference to? 😭
@@zacharywood9416 In the script, Poe and Rey do that movie cliche where they pretend to be lovers kissing so that the stormtroopers don't see their faces and leave them alone; Jenny imagines the characters in Jurassic World doing this to confuse velociraptors.
I could picture the Raptor blushing
Honestly they should use it for the Jurassic World 3. The volcano one was already super dumb, just turn it all the way up
"Don't have sex, you will get pregnant and die"
- Luke Skywalker, apparently
Padmé can confirm
@@michellehanson984 😂😂😂😂😂omg. A+
@@michellehanson984 Padmé as a historical case study for abstinence classes 💀
Much of this reads like pretty bad fanfiction, but ain't gonna lie, Hux being a fanboy surrounded by Star Wars merchandise (I mean, it isn't, but it is. Come on) actually made me chuckle.
Maybe he has all of those round drink bottles from Star Wars Land
I really want to know how the hell he god Mace Windus Lightsber and if it has any significance at all or if Trevorrow simply thought that people would recognise it.
@@Picking.a.name.is.hard1 I'm sure you know the answer, deep down.
"Death is a concept invented by the Jedi. I can't even spell it." -Rey Palpatine, 2016
D E
_"I will use the force to heal my broken body"_ - Kylo Ren, 2016
In fairness, do we even know that Rey can read and write?
@@jackjones4248 Yes. We even know that she reads the same language the Sacred Jedi Texts (and Luke's notes therein) were written in.
My read is that torvalen isn't even evil. He's just a kindly carnival man who teaches cool magic tricks like pretty colored hand lightning and pig fueled cosmetic facial reconstruction and is entirely unaware of the potentially insedious uses of his fun sorccery.
Like Bozo the Clown using black magic and deals with demons to pull coins from the back of kids ears, and then being so heartbroken when one of his student uses said black magic to do decidedly not fun things like murdering people and resurrecting dictators