Scared Sober with Delirium Dirk - Day 1 of Delirium Tremens and Alcohol Withdrawal
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- Опубліковано 10 вер 2024
- Delirium Dirk experienced the most frightening experience of his life when he went into 4 days of Delirium Tremens. He recounts his experience in detail of audio and visual hallucinations as he suffered in agony for 4 days. He describes his encounters with the Top Hat Man, Demons, Shadow People, and the Hooded Figure. He provides insightful information in the world of alcoholism, Delirium Tremens, and Alcohol Withdrawal. Which at times can be horrific or comical.
www.scaredsober.org
Facebook - / dirk.rusthoven.94
I’m not even an alcoholic…yet I’m entranced by this guy’s life.
Thanks, man! Yep...it's been a WILD RIDE!!! And I appreciate your positive feedback 👍
I made this Channel to share just what (REAL!) Delirium Tremens are, and what goes on with both the alcoholic, but also those around them. And, with the general public as most folks have no clue what can actually happen with immediate cessation of alcohol. Or, more frankly put, why a safe MEDICAL detox is so real and usually necessary.
But yea, I've had a great ride despite the obvious challenges. You should check out the 'Speaker Meeting' video I have here on our Channel. It's a trip.
Fuck...I'M a TRIP! But, like I said- Been a wild ride indeed!!!!
Thank you again for your time and feedback 😊
Dirk:)👍👍👍
same
Me too ive been watching his videos on repeat for weeks
I went through this last week. I turned 48 last Wednesday. I had been drinking for months but more importantly, I had been drinking pretty heavy for 30 years. Not continuously but it was always a big part of my life. I felt like I hit bottom and quit drinking cold turkey. I started to read my bible as the auditory experience began. Evil laughter, a voice taunting me. I don't recall what it was saying but it was evil. I saw the stuff behind me or to the side of me. As soon as I'd snap my head to look, I'd just miss the image. It felt so evil. I was laying in bed praying. Every time I'd close my eyes? I'd feel those same footsteps. Terrified me. I'd sit on the edge of the bed and feel the steps behind me. In my mind, the presence was real. I could feel a heavy evil presence. I'd lay back down, close my eyes and I'd hear breathing and clawing at my pillow. I'd open my eyes and nothing but the fear was so intense. At times I could feel it sitting on my legs. I managed to sleep from time to time but never at night. I went through this for about two and a half days. Finally on day 3 I went to the ER. I felt a sense of impending doom. I couldn't go another sleepless night and the fear was making my heart stress so much. Thank God with treatment and two days in the ER, I came out of it. Librium definitely helped. I'm glad I sought medical help. I saw little animals, shadow people on the wall. It was the most terrirfying experience of my life. I did have very vivid dreams but I do not recall any of them. I'd recommend that anyone who notices they are losing grip with reality, from alcohol withdrawal? Don't wait like I did, seek medical help. I could of easily died. Find your higher power because there is no doubt that mine saved my life. I pray no one has to go through this. Help is available. Be stubborn and this disease will kill you or scare you sober. The question is, do you want to roll those dice?
God bless you all.
Yes...oh yes. Welcome to the ''You Have Been Thru REAL DT's Club'!.. AMAZING & TERRIFYING!!! So glad you made it to the ER. It's when we don't, we die. Plain and simple...
So, THANK GOD (Your Higher Power!) you didn't stroke out or die of heart failure.
This shit is REAL!!!
God, your story took me back 10 years in a blink.
But thank you SO much for sharing that! Glad you made it thru, and SO glad you are here with us! Check out some of the other videos, and feel free to comment, post, or contact me directly.
Thank you very much, brother!
Dirk:)👍👍💯💯🔥🔥
@@DeliriumTremensScaredSober I'm watching your day three part one video. It made me remember a hideous old woman in a white dress. I would open my eyes and she was standing over me. An old antique white dress. Hideous and scared the hell outta me. Anyways, I appreciate your videos. I'm very thankful to be alive today. I'm considering meetings but at this point, I'm focused on my higher power and have no cravings. I truly believe I was scared sober. I do know I need to take personal inventory and continue to take this one day at a time. I need to focus daily on a lot of things to maintain my sobriety. Thanks brother.
We will also be discussing the dangers in dirt never experiencing sobriety over a 40-year span of being in aa. Currently he has a little over a year and took it upon himself to have close to 10 Sponsees with right around 90 days of sobriety. He led the sponsees to believe he definitely had over a year because he would raise his hand when the discussion leader asked who had over a year sobriety. he gave the general assumption that he had 5 to 10 years in the program and was qualified to sponsor. Clearly he did not care about the individuals and was strictly wanting to increase the number of sponsees he had for his own ego...we will also go into verbal tirades when a sponsee relapsed or left him. A profane lace explosion of horrible comments were said to other sponsees about the poor individual that relapsed... So if you are currently being sponsored by this sick man keep that in mind nothing you tell him is kept a secret.
Originally I read scared sober, as how I have been living my life. Which is scared to be sober. Not scared into being sober. I don’t understand why so many people fear the darkness to that extent. That’s what we beckon with alcohol. Isn’t it?
@@NitemareAfterKrismas that's a new way to look at it....
RIP Dirk
Your honest and terrifying series on DTs brought so much awareness into this world. You’ll be missed
Hit hurt me too that he passed away. I was just becoming a fan
Can't help but think that the beer named Delirium Tremens is particularly poor taste
Totally agree
I've seen that. Its a straight up smack in the face. There's nothing cool about it. Especially delirium in general.
@@Humble-iq5ue agreed
It's one of the best beers on earth though absolutely beautiful
Perhaps not. Might be a good not-so-subtle reminder to people who indulge in alcohol of what is possible.
I truly appreciate the educational information you’re sharing in these videos. Ive been a frequent flyer with alcohol for many years but over the course of the last 3 months it’s been pretty chronic from a boatload of stress. I’ve been through a terrifying experience over the last month which i just realized were tonic seizures. I tried to sober up and not drink anything which I’ve been able to do in the past but this time i was met with a terrifying experience. Ironically when i went to the hospital they could not find anything wrong and labeled both episodes as a panic attack. Well I just had another episode last night and my entire body seized to the point where i felt my throat closing up. I didn’t go to the er though. I instead drank some beer and after about 15 minutes the symptoms went away. I honestly don’t know what to do at this point as I don’t have medical insurance. I’ve wracked up over $20,000 in medical bills from the 2 previous trips where nothing was found. All i do know is that i cannot stop drinking abruptly otherwise I’ll be in the same terrifying situation. Thanks for listening
16 days clean from alcohol and other hard drugs :) had to check myself into detox but dealing with intense withdrawal symptoms on top of having COVID. puking for 4 straight days. i was going crazy, sweating and crying all day and night. shivers. the hallucinations were worse this time around than last year when i went on a similar bender. the first time i was drunk all the way until i was admitted into the hospital this time around i tried to do it at home….made it one day at home before the voices and men coming to kill me but weren’t even real began taking it’s toll on my sanity. 0/10 wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy the physical and psychological anguish alcohol withdrawal gives you. it’s hell on earth. you can’t escape it.
16 days is a fucking MIRACLE!!! For a Real Alcoholic... And it sounds like you 'fit the bill':)
But man...you are OUT of the woods👍. Yep, Covid sucks. But it doesn't hold a candle to REAL Delirium Tremens. And they both can kill us, so what a pair(!).
But yea, you made it! Now, there's only one trick moving forward. NEVER forget this-
You just can't have the FIRST drink. That's it! Simple:) But man, never ever try to have just one or get fucked up for just one night ('cause we're mad, pissed, happy, whatever-) because here's what happens. At least, it happened to me a LOT. Like, every time...
I would get drunk that 'once', and within days I was drinking in the morning...all day and night. Right back in the middle of the shit.
But, if we slip up? Just DON'T EVER QUIT QUITTING!!!
You, man, are already over the major shit/detox & withdraw. Complete with (REAL!) Delirium Tremens. You never have to go thru that again...
Thank God!!!!
Good stuff, man. Thank you so very much for your positive feedback and support!
Dirk:)👍💯🙏
Hope your well. I no my last one 3 months ago was horrific it was that bad hallucinations. I had a seizure in the hospital which I've ever had there's not been one day that I don't think about what happened. Anyway enough on me and I wish you the very best for a sober and clean life whatever way we look at it we're better of sober 🙏❤️💯
This reply is for Big C's comment-
ABSOLUTELY!!!
You know, you hear this all the time: "My WORST day sober is better than my BEST day drunk & high"...
Really?? WTF??? Who were YOU partying with? 'Cause I had a LOT of fun!!!
Then things got bad. Real real bad...
Being said, I agree with you 100%. At least we're sober........
I wouldn't trade it for ANYTHING.
Thank you so very much for your positive feedback and support!!!
Dirk:))💯
You what always gets me? There's a reason for alcohol. There's an Arabic word "Al-Khul" meaning body eating spirit. Then you have the fact that alcohol is also called spirits. Alcohol opens people up. Both figuratively and spiritually.
Love your videos Dirk. Nevermind me if I post a similar message around a few of your videos for others to see.
Facts
It moved me when you said Hi Im an alcoholic... 1st step to admit you have a problem.. Today is "day 1"
I LOVE IT!!!
Congratulations!!!!!
If I can put it behind me, ANYBODY can! I mean that...
You just 'Made my Day'!!!
With love,
Dirk:)👍👍👍
We will also be discussing the dangers in dirt never experiencing sobriety over a 40-year span of being in aa. Currently he has a little over a year and took it upon himself to have close to 10 Sponsees with right around 90 days of sobriety. He led the sponsees to believe he definitely had over a year because he would raise his hand when the discussion leader asked who had over a year sobriety. he gave the general assumption that he had 5 to 10 years in the program and was qualified to sponsor. Clearly he did not care about the individuals and was strictly wanting to increase the number of sponsees he had for his own ego...we will also go into verbal tirades when a sponsee relapsed or left him. A profane lace explosion of horrible comments were said to other sponsees about the poor individual that relapsed... So if you are currently being sponsored by this sick man keep that in mind nothing you tell him is kept a secret.
Been there done that and got the T-shirt. First time was in 2003 when my father died and I made a real attempt to deliberately drink myself to death over a period of about a month but changed my mind at a litre and a half of spirit a day and I went went cold-turkey. Alone. No friends, no family, nobody around. Big mistake. If it hadn’t been for black market diazepam I would most certainly have died. That was in 2003, and since then I’ve had the DTs about six times, and here’s the thing: it’s easier to fall into every time and it gets progressively worse. Also, I’m not young anymore - 73 and I’m in the danger zone. Not a drop for the past three months and if this ain’t the last time I’m not going to make it to 74. I don’t believe in a higher power, but I wish you guys out there all the best. Bloody hell fire, if I can do it, anyone can! May your God go with you, and best wishes from 🇬🇧 PS: brilliant and touching video. Thanks! PPS: don’t go cold turkey! There is a strong possibility of you dying due to your scrambled brain chemistry. In my experience, diazepam’s the silver bullet, not only ameliorating the horrors and physical hell, but to adjust your brain chemistry to prevent seizures. Get medical help. That’s all folks, thanks for listening.
I know this video is 4 years old but its still reaching people today. I am a real alcoholic as well. I never had visual hallucinations butni had extremely bad auditory hallucinations. Sirens and old timey music and such. This video is a real eye opener. Thank you for sharing your story.
This describes my experience to a T. I was absolutely terrified. I am happy to say I just celebrated 8 years of sobriety.
Hey how’s it going do you remember what your sounds and visions were from start to finish would love to hear it ?
Thank you Dirk for sharing your experiences! It helps a lot of people to not get that far
It is strange how so many of us see the same things. I'm grateful to have found your channel. I'm not a real alcoholic, I can drink small amounts and then stop for a while. But when I have binged, holy shit. the first time I dropped acid I saw a lot, one thing I saw kind of a lot of was translucent demons. I was tripping with friends who could see the exact same things. And while having the DT's, it was like an acid trip but with only the bad parts, which were multiplied by a hundred. It feels like your going to hell, and even worse, like you deserve it. Just the most hopeless feeling I've ever experienced. But what's strange is I saw similar things as I did on the acid, translucent demons moving in the darkness. I had the same auditory hallucinations, like ambient cafeteria chatter or something. Got the dts again a couple weeks ago, this was way more extreme: was sitting at my computer, looked down between my legs, and I only saw it for like a split second, but there was a black demonic looking dwarf standing there with flesh and everything, and he was just glaring up at me with these big white eyes. I looked away and it vanished, but that was way too real. Never seen anything like that . Still no where near as bad as what you described, though. Happy you're still here
Wow! Yea...you 'get it'-
It's interesting... When I describe (attempt to!) REAL Delirium Tremens, I tell people "It's like taking 20 hits of good LSD...and NOT knowing you took it..." I think that's pretty accurate 👍
Glad you're here too, man! WHAT a story! I mean, fucked up, yea. But as a testimony to cats like you that just binge periodically and otherwise drink normal... Withdraw is no fucking joke-
Thanks so much for your positive feedback and support!!!
Dirk:)💯💯💯
hey my man! crazy to see you and others have gone through dt's before and actually understand how bad it really gets most dont understand or just think we were crazy it definetly makes you rethink life and choices congrats on your sobriety you give hope for others who may be in a dark spot in life
Just found out he passed away, I watched this guy try and get sober. He was good at getting drunk, not good at getting and staying sober.
How you know he passed away?
He did. Morphine and Benzos.
In my late 20s/early 30s I was the deepest into my drinking. I couldn't work because I was drinking every waking moment and sleeping with my bottle of vodka in my arms. Eventually I started having auditory hallucinations and walked around the entire house trying to find the source. Then I'd have evil, chanting voices. I don't think it was much longer after that, when I couldn't keep any alcohol down and was quickly entering the withdrawals. I felt like I was dying, and I really was. I was able to get into a detox unit the same day. Never try and quit on your own as it could kill you. Recovery is possible, it's not always easy, but possible
How are you now?
I’ve gone through something similar to your dream that was super vivid and it was like a level of what Hell would be like. More real than being awake which was scary as shit. Makes me seriously think this is actually stepping into a spiritual realm and beyond a normal dream.
Things banging on door to get In, voices out side window and in the room, pillows being pulled off bed and finally a dark figure running over to me kicking my face. Was fucking terrifying!!! Stay away from alcohol people. This is real stuff.
Yep...you've been there!
The real deal.. welcome to the 'club'...
Stay sober & it will never happen again!
Real glad you're here with us. Thank you so much for your positive feedback.
Don't quit QUITTING!!!
Dirk:)💯
This is how sick I was.....I actually tried to make friends with the hallucinations. One gave me a massage.
That sounds horrible! :(
Yeah I heard the voices. I followed the ghosts sobbing for help. I ran from the clown that I had angered. I spat at the bad men strapping me down. But those bad men saved my life and I'm 60 days sober now. Thank god that nightmare ended.
You MADE IT!!! this stuff is absolutely no joke-
What makes 'sense' to us just baffles others. But, it makes perfect sense at that time.
I get it-
Glad you made it, and please use that experience to help others. I guess that's why we're here...
Thanks so very much,
Dirk:)💯💯💯
@@DeliriumTremensScaredSober and thank you too for helping people understand. And thank God for terrific nurses and doctors who know how to treat people in that condition. It must be very scary for them too.
I went through it 4 times another realm for days. Last time i died met god the after life and brought back , i was drinking litres of vodka a day 3 week bender. And stopped my liver failed did same kept waking up going back into the same realm. These arnt dreams thats doors we shouldnt be opening very dangerous. Since my encounter with God i havnt touched or even wanted a drop of alcohol. Im currently writing a book will be published by end of september.
Awesome & terrifying. I SO 'get it'. No, fuck no... Delirium Tremens are NOT just dreams. I, too, should have been flat out DEAD. And I'm talking just about my first experience with DT's. As a matter of fact, most people in Recovery have never been thru REAL Delirium Tremens. They think DT's are the shakes, cold sweat, puking and generally hating life because I'm GOING to have another drink (5th) at that point.
But REAL Delirium Tremens??? It's hard to get people to understand how dangerous and REAL that they are. And that would be a truely horrible way to die.
But I loved your story, and would LOVE to read your book! Let me know how to get it:)👍👍👍
Again, I appreciate your positive feedback and support! Congratulations on your Sobriety as well!!!
Awesome-
Dirk;)💯💯💯
@@DeliriumTremensScaredSober Absolutely spot on mate. And you will never forget your encounter. Ive subbed mate as soon as my book is published ill be back in here with a link. It will blow you away mate but i know you will believe every word in my book having experienced an encounter with tremens your self. My blast encounter will blow you away mate. When i was brought back by God himself i was totaly reset mate i cant stand the stentch of alcohol , not once i had an urge to drink. All my demons , depression the PTSD from childhood things that happened was gone , mind was cleared mate total new mind crystal clear with enlightenment and knowledge of life and afterlife. Im glad i stumbled on your video mate and happy your here to tell your encounter. Thanks mate again as soon as my books ready i shall post you a link. Take care buddy 😊👍
Your book published yet johno?
@@johno8562 I too.will believe every word from your book. I will never forget my Delirium tremens. I've had countless alcohol withdrawals,12 of those led to Delirium tremens. I've been hospitalized 17 times and the rest I self detoxed. I just got out of rehab on the 17th of this month. I'm 25 days sober today and back on the wagon and back on track. I'm 36 years old and I've been truly fighting this demon since 2007. I've been drinking longer than that but 2007 is when I started experiencing mild to moderate withdrawal and I knew absolutely nothing about withdrawal then. I constantly researched about it since 2009 after my first real Delirium. I'm so glad there is people on this youtube page who can relate. I too also met higher dimensional beings through DTs and it's definitely not all hallucinations. I honestly think when a small percentage of people who can reach the Delirium tremens stage our brain is tapping into something that is almost unexplainable like DMT.
#Ilovesobriety!
I have had this before and it’s horrific .. Bless anyone who’s going through it now 😢
Right, Sushi.
Its horrific.
And. If they survive, they MAY 'Make It'.
Or die. Thats the other option.
Glad to see you here!!!
Dirk Delirium:)
@@DeliriumTremensScaredSober Thanks a lot, and I’m glad I’m here because I thought I’m finished at the time. Gratefully in recovery now ❤️🩹.. Cheers
Today is my first day off a very heavy drinking binge . I'm shaking like mad , I can feel and hear my heart racing and I'm sure I can see it beating too
Ok.
Ok... You WILL be ok. First, what's your number? I'll call you if you would like. Send me your name, number, time zone and I will call you.
Hang in THERE!!! I know it's tough. I, without speaking to you or any knowledge on your specific situation, will tell you straight the fuck up-
GO TO THD ER AND AT LEAST GET SOME ATIVAN OR LORAZAPAM. Same stuff. But, it will temper your body down. Are you going to be sick? Yes.
Are you going to feel terrible?
Yes.
Can you GET BETTER??...
Yes.
Let's talk in a bit. Of you choose-
Dude. If I can do this 'one day at a time'....
Anyone can.
Or, you let it kill you. I'm not 'nice' here. It is 100% fatal, 100% of the time. Unless YOU change.
Enough preaching- it will kill you or you recover. It's just that fucking simple.
Send me your number, and we will talk. No long winded BS on why you are 'bad' or 'wrong'...
You're not. Just alcoholic is my guess.
Chef2HelpU1@yahoo.com
I'll talk with you on a bit, or you won't wish to.
My brother....you fucking CAN 'Recover'. Let's look at options-
Cool??
Thank you so very much for your time. You sure helped me!....
Much respect-
Dirk:)💯💯💯
M black, hope you are OK hope you got treatment I've been there seizures full on delirium tremans liver disease I believe I'm lucky to be alive every detox I had was in hospital or rehab. I agree with everything dirk says hope you are getting better god bless
@@Fubar-tq7vz Thanks, I'll be honest the DTS were to bad I couldn't handle and I'm drinking still , although I know it's a excuse
@@mblack422 very few if any stop first time if any I've had 4 medical detoxes so I relapsed 4 times I'm still taking one day at a time .if you have the desire to stop and most importantly seek help I was probably having seizures when I was alone as I knew nothing about them and I was having black outs. seek help mate and plan your next move carefully I'm sure you know the ramifications god bless and good luck .maybe you have already tried AA if not look them up god bless
@@Fubar-tq7vz Honestly I'm conflicted, I have been in AA sober for years , I was genuinely content and happy . I've been drinking about 5 years now on and off . I do also have quite severe major depression , although I know exactly drinking is the worst thing I can do , I'm so tired of being lonely and depressed I feel I have nothing to lose .
Thank you for sharing, I went true the same for about 3 to 4 days is something I don't want to experience ever again, I'm at AA program doing step 4 ,
That's AWESOME!!! I'm doing a video on all 12 Steps as we speak. I'm posting Step 1 right here tonight, as the intro video is already up. I will think you will find (my) Step 4, 5 & so on interesting as you pursue your 'journy'. I, too, practice AA. I believe ANY 'Brand' of Recovery will work. I, like you, just preference AA.
Thanks so much for your feedback! Hit the little red 'Subscribe' button to see all the videos. I look forward to your feedback!
Thanks so much,
Dirk:)👍👍💯💯‼‼
I'm definitely be waiting for more videos .thank you sir. today you bring more hope into my life
@@wilfredavila4608 You can DO this!!!
@@DeliriumTremensScaredSober Yes he can! You’re a good man DT 😎
You talk about old yellow eyes. A demon from the TV show supernatural. Why do you think alcohol is refered to as "spirits"
I've just got threw dangerously on my own I've had it before many time but this time was the worse seriously scary good look with your sobriety 🙏❤️
Thanks for sharing your story - really interesting, I never knew that this was the experience of alcohol withdrawal
It's a rare thing to experience DTs like this. Unfortunately it happened to me too. It scared the shit out of me and the people around me in rehab.
I’m 45, been drinking almost everyday for the past … maybe 2 years. Thank god I haven’t gotten to the point of seeing and hearing things but have had gotten to the point of insomnia, shakes, sweats and anxiety. I’ve been reading a lot of the comments and watching your videos. Hopefully in the next day or two I can get myself to go to the hospital even though I got no insurance. Was worried on how much it’ll cost me but then again, I already got so much debt and tax issues that I guess my health is more important.
I tried to do cold turkey from Gabapentin. By day three I was in a terrible state. Very rapid heart rate, hallucinations and confusion. The physical pain was also terrible. People can die from Gabapentin withdrawals also as it has all the same withdrawals as Benzoes and alcohol. Can't really imagine a worse way of dying in all that confusion and altered reality. Still trying to get of gaba but it's almost impossible.
DON'T QUIT QUITTING...
And, see what your doctor can do for you??? Gaba is so fucking common...they are all familiar with this and how to break the cycle. Do it‼️‼️‼️
And yes, there would be no WORSE way to die than in that confused and terrifying experience. Yikes‼️
So glad you're here with us, brother👍
Dirk:)💯💯💯
I'm also a "real alcoholic". Gotta years sober has not altered that fact. It is best to remember. By the way, the Shih-tzu is my favorite brand of dog.
You needed to know that
This man routinely post on social media his sponsees first name and last initials along with a picture of the sponsee and him after they finish doing step work including step 5. I have seen him go as far as having the sponsee hold up their fifth step for the camera.... The individuals he does is to are usually very new to the program and in a sober living program themselves. They flat out do not understand the danger of posting a picture of themselves promoting their step work on social media in a public setting. The repercussions that can come from that can be lifelong and devastating. nobody with any time in the program and understands how it works will let him do this. he had actually been banned from several meetings for the danger he poses to AA and newcomers.
Tremendously appreciate these stories, sounds close to mine. Thank you.
I'm glad you're doing better sir!
Thanks so much!!!!!
It's the nightmares that are the worst part.. 🖤
That's quite a book collection! Good stuff
Thanks! Those books saved my life
DeliriumTremens can you name the books you have in the video?
@@jp5isones Yes, ABSOLUTLY. Great books, and I love the 'history' on just why I'm so fucked up.
By the way, I'm not 'stuck' on one 'brand' of Recovery. Myself personally? I do AA because I find the 'spirituality' more mature. But whatever works for ANYONE, I would support(!)...
Books are as follows: Alcoholics Anonymous (Big Book), AA Comes of Age, 12 & 12, Living Sober, 24 Hours a Day, Daily Reflections, and then my TWO (Favorite!), Not God- A History of AA & The Spirituality of Imperfection...both by Ernest Kurtz. Those two are AWESOME. The Big Book is necessary to work the 12 Steps of the program, & the 12 & 12 is a good 'companion' to do so. Of course, you work the Steps with a Sponsor. Results?? It REALLY FUCKING WORKS!!!
& I tried everything else 'My Way'..
Hope that helps!
Dig it-
Dirk:)👍👍💯💯✅✅‼‼
@@jp5isones We will also be discussing the dangers in dirt never experiencing sobriety over a 40-year span of being in aa. Currently he has a little over a year and took it upon himself to have close to 10 Sponsees with right around 90 days of sobriety. He led the sponsees to believe he definitely had over a year because he would raise his hand when the discussion leader asked who had over a year sobriety. he gave the general assumption that he had 5 to 10 years in the program and was qualified to sponsor. Clearly he did not care about the individuals and was strictly wanting to increase the number of sponsees he had for his own ego...we will also go into verbal tirades when a sponsee relapsed or left him. A profane lace explosion of horrible comments were said to other sponsees about the poor individual that relapsed... So if you are currently being sponsored by this sick man keep that in mind nothing you tell him is kept a secret.
We will also be discussing the dangers in dirt never experiencing sobriety over a 40-year span of being in aa. Currently he has a little over a year and took it upon himself to have close to 10 Sponsees with right around 90 days of sobriety. He led the sponsees to believe he definitely had over a year because he would raise his hand when the discussion leader asked who had over a year sobriety. he gave the general assumption that he had 5 to 10 years in the program and was qualified to sponsor. Clearly he did not care about the individuals and was strictly wanting to increase the number of sponsees he had for his own ego...we will also go into verbal tirades when a sponsee relapsed or left him. A profane lace explosion of horrible comments were said to other sponsees about the poor individual that relapsed... So if you are currently being sponsored by this sick man keep that in mind nothing you tell him is kept a secret.
Hi from Canada.
Thank you. You helped steer me in the correct direction.
Stay strong.
I've experienced the same thing with the dreams, demonic imagery or just demons and ultra violence. Waking up and then going back into the same dream when I fall back asleep. This would happen over and over with each time the dream would progress further into the narrative. I still remember them 7 years later. They were beyond disturbing, I have no words for the depth of impact these dreams had. I would sometimes realise I was dreaming after the 3rd or 4th round of the same dream and I would often become possessed myself in the dream. The constant of demons and a manifestation of pure evil was so common and completely out of the blue in respect to my real world interests.
It's very strange to hear of other alcoholics having experienced the same kind of imagery
This needs 1M views asap!! I never knew about dt's and withdrawal when I started drinking. I don't think anyone who drinks a lot knows about them, until it happens. But, by then it's too late, you either survive them or become a sad statistic. More people need to know the truth about alcohol, and the fate of someone who drinks heavily.
Exactly my point of starting this Channel. It's REAL TERRIFYING...and it REALLY KILLS US!!!
Thank you so very much for your feedback, and please SHARE THIS anywhere you think it will have some value.
The whole point is, this may save a life!!!!
So glad you're here with us:)👍👍👍
Dirk:)💯💯💯
Loved your video, these things can be extremely traumatic and out this world
had one a few years ago of satan forcing me to play on his game show and each task he would kill a member of mine. The end was burning a home with my nephew. Terrible I also remember him making myself shove a cactus through myself. I truly wonder how these things form in our mind.
I SO 'Get It'. The version of 'Hell' I saw in the 'vivid dreams ' portion ot DT'S was like that. There were ALL these people coming to the island where this 'death factory' was. They were all so happy & EXCITED to arrive, but I knew WHAT was going on inside. I had been IN it. They were even grinding up the teeth of the dead and incorporating into 'ice cream' they were passing out to the 'new arrivals'. They were coming by cruise ships and huge busses...lined up.
Do yea, it was SO FUCKED UP...and I really do 'Get It'...
I will be happy to talk to you, man- Private message me at Dirk Delirium/Facebook. Send me your number. I will text first (704 area code), introduce myself, and we can connect live. Happy to do so-
Thanks so much,
Dirk:)💯💯💯
Thanks for the postings, so glad there’s a term for this. I experienced it pretty bad a few years back, and have been too scared to stop drinking since. Ever since maybe 2-3 years ago, I tried to see how long I could go being sober. I made it to the 6-8th day, when it really started to hit me. I had two pretty scary instances back then. But ever since I’ve not been anymore than a week sober since. Just out of the fear from hearing the voices, and the darkness that’s called out to me when being sober. But I’m so glad to find out this has an actual name. I’m going to try to do another week or so sober now. I just want to have better control, and not have to worry about the fear of the darkness.
@@NitemareAfterKrismas You may (really!) want to do a SAFE 'Medical Detox'. Even in a free, State run place. They will at least give you medicine to prevent seizures AND Delirium Tremens. You can sleep (which is a bitch at home), PLUS....you CAN'T FUCKING DRINK! Amazing concept, right???!
But, that will at least get you 'Set Up' for success.
I can help you from there, if you want it(?). But really, this IS 'Life or Death'. And, if you've been there...you KNOW that.
Let me know what I may do to help??
Thanks so much, and I'm GLAD that you are here with us 👍‼️
Dirk:)💯💯💯
@@DeliriumTremensScaredSober I’m pretty sure I’m fine on my own, thanks. But during my original excessive binge drinking a few years back. I went through some stuff, and stopped caring about the end result. I only recently am getting over another semi rough patch from something else that pulled me under. Again, the end result of prolonged life, just wasn’t something I valued anymore. But I’m over it. I’ve gotten through not drinking before. It really doesn’t bother me, as much as it used to. I think having mental clarity and conflict resolution, is a primary catalyst on where my feet and hands will carry me. Thanks for reaching out though. Oh and I just noticed your first name is just one letter short of drink. Is that a coincidence?
@@NitemareAfterKrismas You know, I NEVER noticed that!!! One letter short...
I'll remember that!
Thanks, brother!
Dirk:)💯💯💯
I’ve gone through some terrible withdrawals multiple times. I wouldn’t say it was as bad as yours but I really thought I was going to die.
Yep.
I remember a few withdraw episodes where I to truely thought I was going to die. I get it!!! And it FUCKING SUCKS!!!!
BUT...here's the 'Kicker'.
I kept drinking (again & again) after those 'withdrawls'. Call it 'Relapsing'. Call it whatever!! Doesn’t matter. It got worse. I was continuing to TRY to get sober thru all this. Problem was, for me, that I would 'Get Sober'. I would hit AA hard... put in time. Relapse... Have worse shit happen....
Repete.
Until I FINALLY GOT IT! And, that's just it. I had REAL! Delirium Tremens a total of 5 times. Yes, the worst one, by far, was the first one and it absolutely SHOULD have killed me. But I went thru them 4 more times(!). Then, I knew they were coming so I kept a plethora of benzos around at that time just for Delirium Tremens.
Plus, I was doing a shit ton of drugs. It was a very strange & EXTREMELY dangerous period of my life. Anyway...
And yea, I STILL DRANK!!!
But man, that's just alcoholism. It really just all makes sense at the time...but, that was simply because I was SO FUCKED UP!!!! And I couldn't even see it...
That's Alcoholism.
Thank God I finally had enough of getting the shit beat out of me, rehabs, detoxes, ER's, psyce ward (1 time after an unplanned overdose. A bad one. They saved my life, BUT thought I had tried to take my own. Nope.... Just drunk.), halfway houses, heroin-den shitbag motels, hookers, drug dealers, police, pimps and an overall dangerous lifestyle.
Again, that's Alcoholism...
But I finally made it! Thank God🙏
&, I fucking LOVE my life today!!! It is absolutely UNBELIEVABLE in an Over-the-Top COOL(!!!!!) kind of way! And, very 'Undeserving' in my honest opinion. And that's saying the least...
But, I so TOTALLY Dig It-
Glad you're here, my friend:)👍👍👍
Do yourself a favor- Quit now, before those close calls get worse and worse. Because they will and DO. And it always kills us. Guaran-Fucking-Tee.
Unless we quit.
Period.
IF...IF we are 'Real Alcoholics', that is. And I know I ABSOLUTELY am. I'm as real as a fucking tornado-
Please keep me posted, and check out some of the other videos I've got up. I promise I WILL be shooting a new one soon.
Thanks so much!
Dirk:)💯💯💯
Man,, im a 35 year vet & Lord knows I "Qualify" , put together bout 2 years completely sober, even when I went back, I couldn't go more than a week till the sickness stopped me, times have changed, I go for months now, average 20 beers a day, I just can't find a "jumping off" point, I live alone, & mostly I'm always by myself, can't find a "jumping off" point, the thoughts & constant, "doom" are worse than the physical, & the physical is bad enough, any advise ??
Yes. Fuck yes, I do...
DON'T QUIT QUITTING!!!
You probably need a 'Safe Medical Detox'. I sure did! (Lots and lots of them) before it FINALLY 'Took'.
Listen, brother- if I can quit...ANYONE CAN.
Yes, I was THAT BAD. I did find the 'Jumping Off Place'...I was just too much of a pussy to kill myself. I did try, though...
Pvt message me at Dirk Delirium and we can talk live if you should like(?).
You CAN quit forever...
Dirk:)💯💯💯
Hey bro, had it bad about 2 months ago! It started off ok! Some sounds! Then blown out sounds! Then it got into people cutting me me up and it felt real its no joke
Thank you for sharing!
I'll never understand why people who are going through such severe DT doesn't just carry around a very small amount with them and take just the tiniest of sips throughout the day
If we could do that, it would work(!). The problem with REAL DT's is two-fold:
First, we often don't know we are in them. What we see and hear is 'real' to us! It's just to wild to explain, but we don't know what you don't know 'isn't real'. Its fucked up(!)-
The second problem for a REAL alcoholic is this: We don't take small sips throughout the day. We drink until we're fucking HAMMERED! At least, I sure did! Once I put any alcohol into me, what-so-ever, i simply can not stop (or moderate) at all. It's so dangerous, but that's the level I progressed to. And to hit the point of 'REAL DT's', you usually have to be pretty far advanced in our drinking behavior.
But yes, small amounts of alcohol spaced out would, in fact, work in theory.
Good stuff, man! I'm glad you are here with us:)👍👍👍
Dirk:)💯💯💯
I totally understand you. I thought it only happened to me.
Dude it's crazy I've had these visions . I've seen the cowboy man it's really like a bad trip on Acid...🥺
I had a similar experience with benzo detox. Voices and visuals and dreams that seem like a lifetime
Sometimes in the nightmares you struggle to try to wake up and you can't get and it's very difficult to get out of them I remember even to the point of praying and dreams
I’ve been drinking heavily daily for 10 years now and honestly this scares me so much I think I’d rather just die young from drinking than go through this.
I have a theory. I believe what you perceived may not in fact be illusory. I am of the mindset that what you are perceiving is in fact real. I believe the mind is affected seriously by the bodies attempt to cope with the absence of alcohol.
Hey dirk, think we can get your written account available?
You should have taper down the daily dosage... I don't understand why people stop drinking immediately. There is not delirium when reducing slowly.
Doesnt work for everyone especially if you drink rly heavy.
I been edging off today my last day. Pray for me
You CAN do it!!
And you will:)
Much love & prayers,
Dirk:)🙏🙏🙏
@@DeliriumTremensScaredSober I can’t believe you responding. I have a question, did fell like things are crawling on you ever?
Of course!
Send me your number to Chef2HelpU1@yahoo.com and I will call you immediately.
Thanks so much,
Dirk:)👍👍👍
In an hour, 72 hours sober for me. Was drinking between 8-16 beers a night with 3-6 vodka shooters for a good year. I'm 35 and have been drinking since I was 17 damn near every day. So far, day one was hell with anxiety. Feel good right now. But, I have a benzo Rx just in case. I'm hoping I don't go through the DTs. I had a minor case of it about 9 years ago and that was scary fucking shit. Shaking, temp swings, fast heart beat. I couldn't even stand. Mild auditory and visual hallucinations.
I'm less than 24 hours sober , I'm shaking like mad and so anxious I have chest pains
Dude....that's all I can say. Thank you!
This is me too every detail,,the wierdest way too prepare youre death experience,,and for a long time,, one problem is they dont tell you this can happen even from Dr's and Hospitals,, its been 12 months and the shadows and dogs still randomly appear in the week day or night,,14 month no alcohol dont think they will ever leave ,, Bit like the movie "Jakobs Ladder"
Why didn’t you go to the hospital?
Dude...I had no idea the statistics were so grim. I was blackout drunk everyday for a decade, and for the last year of my drinking I was slamming between 20 and 30 tall cans of Steel Reserve a day. I went through full blown DT's this past October, and it was so bad I tried to kill myself. When trying to describe it to people I would tell them one of two things:
1. It was literally everything I had ever been afraid of and trying to drink away, and I was finally forced to deal with it. As a kid I was scared of monsters, as an adult I'm scared of emotional things, and I was forced to see both.
2. It was my own version of hell.
But the series of events is exactly the way mine played out: I saw flutters in my eyes and I heard an endless stream of music that only I could hear, I heard people talking about me, and I started seeing small things...within the first 12 hours I had to do a double take at a vacuum in the middle of the hallway because it looked like a creepy little girl at first glance. DT's are the scariest thing I have ever experienced in my life, and the things I saw and heard, man...I heard my sister dying and my mom screaming as though she was watching...I saw my ex girlfriend's rotting head in the freezer and it was taunting me... these are only a couple things out of the all the fucked up shit I saw, and it lasted for seven days. I ended up getting evicted from my house because I was chasing invisible people with knives and I kicked down the front door. I was scared I was turning schizophrenic and that I would remain that way forever. I would have gladly just taken the spiders on the wall too. That's not even including all the physical shit that was happening to my body. I felt like pins and needles were poking me all over, and I was bed ridden within the first 12 hours of my last drink because my muscles were constantly convulsing and I couldn't move.
Can't wait to watch the others. It makes me feel good to know I'm not the only one.
Did you see my other responses? Spooky, and VERY REAL!!!
So glad you are alive...
Thank you so much for your feedback.
Dirk:)👍
I feel like I’ve seen the factory. Settled in a green field, big smokestacks?
Yep....and out on almost an island with a long ass two lane road out to it.
It was a fucking DEATH FACTORY.
Isn't it a trip how many of us have seen such similar terrifying shit in full blown DT'S? Blows my mind...
Thanks so very much for your positive feedback and support!
Dirk:)👍👍👍
@@DeliriumTremensScaredSober I actually experienced the factory after a DPH (Bendryl) OD (fake syrup sold as the real deal). But my experience was eerily similar to DT's, however only lasted 7 hours. Maybe a similar thing is happening to the brain.
Yeah nightmares can get pretty damn weird
If I drink 1 nite 5 pints I feel bad the whole day I can't imagine what this feels like
Well...let me tell you this...
It SUCKS!!!
But here's the COOL thing- For me, all I have to do today is NOT DRINK!!! What a 'novel' idea!!!
You Ciaran, most likely are not alcoholic. I can tell by the first WORD of your comment.
If... If I drink 5 pints. An alcoholic would say "ONLY 5 pints?? What are we going to drink after that?? I'm just getting 'warmed up'!!!" So, you will never have to deal with (REAL!) Delirium Tremens.
Thanks for your feedback! I'm really glad you're here with us.
Thanks so much,
Dirk:)👍👍👍
@@DeliriumTremensScaredSober I used to binge drink foe a few days but stopped that I only drink now and then can't handle it in your 40s I thought it was just to hard, I focus on training now more 6 days a week running boxing weights stuff like that I think it helps me cope.
The insanity is when you keep jumping back into the fire after YOU GET BURNED...😂
How many liters a day did you drink?
When I was younger (17-25), it was a 5th of vodka EVERY night, in ADDITUON to everything I drank at work (Which was a LOT!!!).
Then, I moved to 25-30 Icehouse (or anything 5.5% or higher) beers a day.
They were easier to drinkbin the morning....
Thanks so very much!
Dirk Delirium:)
Has anyone heard of the kindling theory and how it relates with-drawls and DTs. I’m a firm believer in it having experienced it during my alcoholism. Never got to full DTs but I was laying the groundwork for sure.
I'm not familiar with that one, but I'll certainly look into it.
Thank you so very much, and I'm glad your here with us👍👍👍
Dig it-
Dirk:)💯💯💯
@@DeliriumTremensScaredSober I’m seeing people in the comment section saying that their withdrawals aren’t as bad. Kindling describes an increase in withdrawal symptoms over time. It happens in binge drinkers. The stopping and starting seems to have something to do with it. So if you believe the theory a certain percentage of chronic drinkers will develop DTs and you won’t know which detox will be the one. Scary thought. I’ve felt the demon. Never saw it but I felt it on my back and I knew if I died it was going to take me to a place I didn’t want to go. You are right about that.
Yes. Absolutly correct. What Danial is referencing is the 'Progression' of chronic alcoholism. I LIVED IT. And, as we progress, DT'S WILL happen. Its just a question of 'when'. And this shit can KILL YOU‼️‼️‼️
Good stuff, man.
And, once you DO experience REAL DT'S, the probability of it happening again is almost inevitable.
Thank you so very much for your feedback!!!
Glad you all are here...
Dirk:)💯💯💯
Oh and thanks for your honesty. People need to hear about this.
@@DeliriumTremensScaredSober pl
wtf out to restorants ? im dead sitting in bed sweating and shaking
It will get better. I SWEAR! Just hang in there. If you feel Delirium Tremens kicking in, hit the ER ASAP. As soon as you begin to hear shit that's not there. You will know if you have watched any of my videos(!).
After detoxing safely, DON'T QUIT QUITTING!!!
Thanks, my friend. I wish you all the success. Please keep me posted, and let me know what I may do to help?
Thanks so much,
Dirk:)💯💯💯
Do you help people get into treatment?
Yes. Absolutely. And no, I'm not a slime belly 'patient broker'. I make ZERO money on anything I do. It comes down to this.. our work is an avocation. Period. You help me by me helping you.
What State/town are you in?
Thank you!!! There is help!
@@DeliriumTremensScaredSober helllo could i privately talk to you about this or reach you by email . thank you
Yes, I can. I don't get 'paid' to do that, but LORD KNOWS I gave been to them!!!
Private message me at Facebook/Dirk Delirium...
Send me your number, and I am happy to give you a call!
👍👍👍
Dirk:)
I baffles me as to why our brain gives off this experience, it must just be such a stressful biological reaction in the brain where the set up reality within out DNA is completely sent into overdrive witch manifests into DT’s and the experience it provides, the mind is a absolutely mental thing what it can let you experience
This guy is dead? Rip
The sex dreams are so vivid and yes I saw the cowboy hat guy this is not a coincidence... there's definitely something going on...🤔
Are these demons..😳
20 hits of bad lsd is about right. 1 hit =fun. 20 =cancel Christmas.
Did you drink with out stopping for enen a day for 6 months? I've been on 1 now for 10 Months. 12 to 15 beer a day. I take single days off once an a while but not offen. I don't wanna experience this lol
Yes. 6 months on 24/30 a day of 8.2%'ers. My body went into complete shock, then full fucking blown DT's. Unbelieveable...still can't understand how I lived thru it w/o stroking out or heart failure. That's just what happens-
BE CAREFUL, amigo. This shit is as real as real gets. Detox is safe, free, and there for a reason(!). Let me know how it goes-
Dirk:)
Get medical help. You can withdraw much more comfortably. I could never detox on my own it was that bad.
Man how is your liver ?
Functionality is like 96%, last I checked. Which was two months ago.
Amazing. The one organ that repairs itself. And all I have to do??
Not drink.
Yes, I should not have survived. But I did...
Amazing.
Thanks so much! So glad you're here with us 👍.
Dirk:)💯
@@DeliriumTremensScaredSoberI'm on day 2 ,doctor told me my liver is pretty swollen ,he then said something about enzyme 400 which I had no clue about but he used the word Catastrophic ,which in turn has kicked me right in the fucking arse ,I went out bought berries,juice,nuts etc , have an appointment Monday with a proper Alcohol service ,you sir are a legend I hope we have a chat sober soon xc
Inn on Britain by the way your videos really help .
I've had those dreams before, It's Time Travel... Days will happen in your head... But maybe maybe 2 hours passed.. 😎
the minister didnt know what he was talking about, he almost killed you, not advisable!
Dude I went on a year and a half bender and every morning I'd crawl to the bathroom puke and cry 😂 no shittt
You are pretty forgiving of the minister. But, wow, people who do not understand how to medically detox someone should NOT be giving advice about stuff like this. I hope he understands this now...he's lucky you didn't die and/or sue him
You know, I don't know if it ever really 'sunk in'. Needless to say, I didn't return, and he moved elsewhere.
Yes, not his fault as most people are ignorant in just how severe real alcohol withdraw can be. That, and benzodiazepines are the ONLY two 'withdrawals' that actually kill. It's real scary stuff(!).
Thank you so much for your feedback, and I am glad you're here with us!
Please share our Channel...it may just save a life!
Thanks so much,
Dirk:)👍👍👍💯💯💯
I just started a new channel on alcohol/drug recovery. I've been through alcohol withdrawal several times and it is nasty shit indeed.
The pain is so extreme...nothing compares.. 🤢🤮😣❤️
the spirits are real its all real
Absolutely, the demons are coming for you as they control you through the alcohol.
Very true, words of wisdom. It's all spiritual, and we become physically/spirituality vulnerable when we're experiencing life threatening withdrawals from alcohol. The good lord Jesus Christ has given me the gift of sobriety and the wisdom to know what that poison truly is. God Bless
Look into tapering friends. It can save your life
It is very difficult for an alcoholic to tape, as we tend to just get drunk all over again. If done correctly tapering does work. The idea solution is to go to the hospital.
Tapering is neer Impossible for a alcoholic.. We drink to get loaded, I for 1 can't have 1 beer at supper and be done. 1 turns into 15 everytime
Yes. DAMN NEAR IMPOSSIBLE!!! I tried, with best intentions only to fail EVERY time. Every single time...
Then, the 'I'll do it tomorrow, but I may as well get good and fucked up now' would set in, and I was DONE. I REQUIRED a safe medical Detox after almost loosing my life to real Delirium Tremens. They are fatal more often than not.
No, I do not suggest tapering at all, but it CAN be done (almost ALWAYS with someone else involved). But we alcoholics can get around that, too...were too damn smart! Detox is the best solution.
I have tried tapering so many times....I end up drinking more. One time after tapering I ended up on a detox shaking in a bed and getting medicated for 3 days...next time I ended up in the hospital with even more tests and meds being given....I myself as an alcoholic cannot taper apparently :( I end up drunk again. The craving and obsession is too strong. But if it works for you then great!
No. Tapering does absolutely NOT WORK for this alcoholic, either! I don't recommend it, and it's dangerous. I do what you do...drink more(!)...
But, Brown Tupperware is entitled to his/her opinion. My recommendation is Safe Medical Detox!!!
All the way-
Saved my life!!!
Thanks!
Dirk:)😊😊😊
I've been through delium tremes.... It's an acid trip to HELL.. 😎
RIP Dirk. Morphine and Benzos.
How do you know about his death? . I can't find any info. If he did pass away it's so sad and must have been suicide if he took enough morphine and benzos to die. This really is so sad and had to happen within past 7 months. Please send me a link about his death. I am so sorry to hear this bad news if true.
Why suicide? Maybe he just wanted to get high.
Your proud of that nickname?
It’s not a matter of being proud, but rather a matter of him being realistic.
@@Tommy88- I've been there. Nobody needs to know.
Isn't it weird with the sex fever dreams their not even fun their frightening huh....😂
I actually drank for a whole year... Just so I could achieve the tremens.... 😎🤟 It is like dropping acid... 😂
6 months is a warmup
Thank you for your video. I’ve experienced everything you have still struggling with alcohol, but much better than I used to be on 49 now got a lot better when I was 46 but still a problem I always thought have you ever felt this way that delirium tremens is actually opens up another dimension. It may actually be there that our brains are just turned into it briefly I don’t know what your take
what about tampering off?