Online Grooming & The Pink Pill | a Detrans Story, with Robin
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- Опубліковано 28 бер 2022
- Follow Robin on twitter @niwatori_dt and his writing at clefairy.net
Some hard-hitting criticism of Gender Ideology and AGP realism by Schrodinger's TransCat: / @schrodingerstranscat
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Jesus Christ, that could have been me. As a kid I was also this insecure, this much into nerdy stuff, and so much feeling disconnected from other boys. Now I have a wife and a son. Thank God there was no gender ideaology back then, because if someone told me there was a fix to all this angst and the fix was to transition, I might have made the biggest mistake of my life.
I think this all the time. I was an edgy goth kid and I truly feel I would have fallen into the trans trap myself. It’s scary to think where I’d be now or what I would be like. I’m really grateful it wasn’t around as I was growing up.
I still feel very strongly about this topic bc I have two young daughters (young girls tend to be very susceptible to social pressures/standards) and I’d be crushed if my daughters fell into this tragic, traumatic ideology.
@@belove751 I feel the same way. I'm also a mother who is very concerned with the social contagion. I grew up as an autistic nerdy girl, so I get it. I almost fell into the trans trap as a young adult. I'm so glad I found the truth before physically transitioning.
An autistic friend of mine, who didn't feel like they were one of the boys (because they are autistic AF) and wasn't very stereotypically masculine (slender, no fan of sports, nerdy). Has decided that they are trans.
I think they are just working from a stereotypical perspective, they are the textbook nerdy male, and are running from the idea of being a cis white male (imo because of trauma with their peers).
It saddens me.
More people need to be talking about this. So many de transition stories I’ve heard start with “I joined Tumblr and saw memes that said my anxiety and teenage angst was because I’m trans”.
You're an extremely feminine appearing male person. Even I know you're vulnerable to being beaten up in a male toilet. Security guard follows you in to protect you. Saves them all that paper work in the event of an incident.
The fact that social media so prejudiciously censors any content that even questions trans ideology, is the biggest problem. Without free expression, people easily fall into these predatory echo chambers. And these groomers are predators, period. They should be treated the same way society treats others who hurt kids. I mean normal society, not Hollywood.
@@toobnoobify well the Hollywood/media machine has been incredibly efficient at framing the narrative and covering up/defending grooming children. Ex. The “Don’t Say Gay” bill in Florida; the fact that that’s the name everyone knows the bill by shows how effective they are.
@@toobnoobify ...And schools of higher ed responsible for training counselors snd social workers. The activism of CRT trumps any attempt to get at the root of what troubles the soul of the person walking into a session. Couple this with all the coaching people get online to say what's needed to get that letter of support for the HRT and surgery...
Back when I was on Tumblr up to 2016, what broke the illusion for me were all those neurodivergent people identifying as otherkin, which made absolutely no sense and made me critical of the idea of transgenderism itself. Now it's literally sanctioned. What hot garbage.
How can anybody hear these testimonies and at the very least not see how incredibly intricately complex these matters are and thus suggesting a one size fits all solution is not only unfathomable but also potentially cruel and dangerous!
Thanks for doing this Robin. I sincerely wish you all the best as you continue your journey through life.
Well said. Sending Robin all the best. And don't feed the trolls...
they see it, there are just some cruel masterminds in this world, or at least callous enough
Well yeah, but having thoughts like that is transphobic... apparently.
My son is ocd and I definitely see a lot of ocd in the trans community. They will obsess about something all day, all night, and make impulsive choices. Many of which they regret later.
Some people do suggest that the eating disorder community (which I think is also rooted in OCD) is mostly now the trans community.
ADHD too. I think naturally occurring OCD is pretty rare among males, but the internet definitely can lead to OCD thoughts.
What's the relationship of autism with OCD?
@@Matt24002 Autism is highly comorbid with OCD. Families with OCD likely have autism in the family as well.
@@katieandnick4113 My dad has OCD and half of my male siblings have symptoms, as do half the females including myself.
Almost in tears listening to this.... you are a lovely thoughtful person Robin, far more than you realise I think. 🏵️🌺🌻🌼 I'm autistic and afraid for autistic young people these days. So glad you are highlighting these issues.
I sure wish more creators would highlight stories like this. While they can tough to hear, there can be no doubt people would be helped by hearing such CALMversations
Michael Knowles interviewed a detransitioner on his show 4 days ago..look it up, it was so very interesting and informative. Its called Helena's Detranstioning story.
Helena is a channel regular :)
@@kathygriffey3958 ... Yes. I think I saw that he did so and obviously Blaire White as well. Just that YT frowns upon such conversations and writes the algorithm accordingly!
@@BenjaminABoyce I think I've seen all her appearances on your channel! With each interview, she's become more at ease at telling her story. Knowles really didn't need to do much; Helena already knew what she wanted to say. I think her "calmversations" here really helped her open up. Hopefully, some of the confused young women who've been drawn into the transgender trap will hear Helena's story and learn from it.
Aha, so it was you two, Batman and Robin, who caused the trickle of views on my channel to suddenly turn into a ... slightly bigger trickle. That's been baffling me all day.
Seriously though, thanks Robin for the shout-out! And great to hear your story on the Boyce.
I love you, brother. There's nothing at all wrong with being a soft man. I think we should all be us, taking the most admirable traits from men and women rather than taking chemicals and knives to ourselves.. I strongly believe that the rigid gender roles contribute to gender dysphoria.
Why then, is gender dysphoria(or what they call gender dysphoria anyway) practically epidemic now, when rigid gender roles are less of a problem than they’ve ever been? There are certain innate conditions, like ASD, ADHD, and of course homoseggsuality, that predispose boys to behave in a less stereotypically masculine way. And for the former two, that may only mean they have less self confidence, are more emotionally sensitive(ADHD only) and have less interest in sports, than NT boys. And those disorders, despite what the medical industry wants us to believe, are quite rare. Masculinity is part of being male. It’s what helps them do the thing they are here to do. I personally don’t think humans have much time left, relative to how long we’ve been here, but if you’re okay with painful human extinction, then go ahead and encourage het males to stop being masculine. Maybe there’s some confusion about what masculinity and femininity mean.
@@katieandnick4113 I'll have a go at answering your question. Relaxed gender roles, influenced by feminism, have resulted in pushback from groups in society that believe gender is innate, that women are inferior and homosexuality problematic. That's why I believe that 'trans rights allies', most of whom will never undergo hormone treatment or surgery themselves, are more accurately described as gender conservatives.
That might help explain why many 'trans allies' seem to have had an evangelical upbringing. Does this sound like a feasible explanation to you?
@@katieandnick4113 Gender roles less of a problem, you say? How would you react if your six year old grandson wanted you to paint his nails? I racked my brain for any logical reason why a man would be any less of a man while wearing nail polish, and frankly I couldn't. This is just one of those arbitrary rules which society still imposes. In all other areas, except for being very empathic with animals, the kid is as masculine as they come. So I said yes, but you're still a boy. Prior to all this gender insanity, I believed we were souls inhabiting bodies, and many of the behaviors were hormone directed. The problem is that these days we have kids that are transitioning before even going through puberty. I didn't want my grandson altering himself out of frustration at being told what he can and cannot do if he is a male. I think there will always be a supply of traditional macho men who will do what men are biologically programmed to do, which is basically fight to protect women and children. Because males are expendable in nature. Personally, I can be very soft at times, but I can also be very hard when the situation requires it. Try to harm my family, and I will do what it takes, no matter how vicious. I hope this makes sense, and I am very troubled at the current demonization of men and vulnerable people being exploited by social trends before they have developed the strength of character and self knowledge that comes with adulthood.
I'm no psychologist, but it seems that Robin has been influenced by a lack of positive male role models, first with violent stepfather and then the labeling of men by new wave feminists. Add to that the litteralism that stems from possibly being on the spectrum and he pretty much hates his male self. Hence, I say to him, you do you and don't try to force yourself into a box that doesn't fit.
responding to this whole comment chain generally - I feel like gender roles haven't been as rigid as now since the 50s (not like I knew what the 50s - the mid 90s were like, I'm just guessing). we are transing GNC people currently like never before, after all.
@@niwatori3963 The 1970's to 1990's were pretty gender fluid in British and US counterculture, at least. I have a video on my channel 'Is gender boomer culture?' which you might find interesting.
A very honest and raw testimony. The truth will set us free.
20:53 Gynaecomastia (breast growth in males) sometimes happens as a side-effect of all the hormonal changes during puberty. As far as I know, it's not caused by low testosterone. It's caused by excess oestrogen.
Weirdly, this situation could actually be due to *high* testosterone. If testosterone hangs around in the body for long enough without being used, it gets bored and turns into oestrogen. Bodybuilders who take T supplements can accidentally end up growing man-boobs.
Gynaecomastia can also be a side-effect of obesity. I think it has to do with excess fat disrupting your endocrine balance, but I'm not sure.
shit i might be an autistic man bc i love your channel ;)))
@@TheBuggeroff I've had a few comments about autism on my channel. It's starting to worry me ... 🤨
Thanks for the love though!
@@SchrodingersTransCat Nah, don't worry. It means you aren't boring anyone with ADHD or similar, I guess. I usually have to press pause a couple times bc I want to take in all the written comments as well. Welcome :)
I think a child's brain is geared up to "collect" information that we intuitively know is important/significant, even if it makes little sense to ourselves at the time...sex being one of these things. Any "interesting" images that a small child sees will stick in their brains. Information that is not relevant to their present lives, will be "filed" for later reference. The fact that we are allowing children to be exposed to explicit (and violent) porn, means we are inflicting images on their brains from which they will never be free. This is simply an abuse of the human capacity to learn.
This is so true. There are two images from TV "horror story" programmes that appeared very briefly on screen and terrified me when I was, I think, about 12 years old. For years they would keep popping into my mind's eye and I thought I would never be free of them.
Reading your comment resurrected them and I know from past experience that it will be a while now before they stop reappearing for no reason.
The same thing happened with a horrifying scene in a book that I read in my teens. It was years before the images that it summoned up stopped haunting me.
It is very worrying that children are being exposed to explicit, violent porn, whether in images or verbally, written or audio.
@@Genderwang I don't know what country you're from but I resonate with the "horror story" programme flashbacks, but for me it was TV public service announcements. We had a lot of scary ones in the UK. Also really odd not intentionally scary but eerie things like when channels would cut to test cards or test patterns - or when the TV announcer would say good night and it would go black. I don't know why that scared me but it did and it's stayed in my head at least all of this time! :P
@@niwatori3963 I am in the UK too :-) I think you are too young to remember what is generally reckoned to be the scariest of those PSAs. The one about kids drowning . . . with the Grim Reaper at the side of the pond? That one haunted many of us of a certain age!
Out of the two detrans stories I've heard through this channel, both involve older transwomen grooming young boys online. 🤔
Thank you Robin for being honest and vulnerable. I hope this helps in processing your life story as it was, is now, and will be. And thank you BAB for continuing to be one of the few people who don't politicize people's experiences.
Our world is so broken 💔
I also feel saddened by what these young people have gone (are going) through. The internet had so much potential to connect people, but it has gone so very wrong.
'I think this generations screwed'
I couldn't agree more. 60% roughly, of the girls on my kids school are 'Rainbow kids', trans, lesbian, pan etc
In most non Western countries the rates of gender dysphoria are around 0.006 to 0.008. The rates in the west in 1990 were 0.08. Which means its definitely a problem but the chances of you knowing someone who has it is are 1 in 80,000.
In California in 2021 it was 1 in 5.
The way that responsible adults have dealt with this trend will be looked upon I'm future as one if our darkest moments.
Wow, i feel so sorry for this young man😢
My favorite TransCat finally getting the attention he deserves.
TransBat took this comment personally.
I was born in 1963, and was fully aware that something was off by the time I hit third grade. Just as my classmates were starting to develop crushes on kids of the opposite gender, I was developing crushes on boys. Clearly, I was a gay kid, but there was no language for it at that time, and I had absolutely no idea why I liked boys. In total isolation, I convinced myself that I must be a girl because only girls like boys. I felt this way until I was well into middle school, and only then did I come to realize that something call "homosexuality" existed. I look back and laugh at my younger self now, but imagine if the "trans ideology" was in vogue at that time. Good lord... I could have easily fallen under the spell of a group of teachers who might have convinced me that I was trans. Thank god I didn't have today's gender-obsessed teachers shaping my identity!
How many of today's "trans youth" are really just gay kids who haven't quite figured it out yet??? I suspect quite a few of them, tbh... and it scares the hell out of me.
A house with miniature furniture and other stuff is definitely not just a girl's toy! It's too cool and every kid should have one!
Gordon Ramsey, a very blokey bloke, would certainly agree!
Will anyone ever be held accountable for all the problems transitioning has caused children?
Yes society as a whole is gonna pay for this in many ways … because its allowing kids to be lab rats now so the future is gonna come back and “Bite “ and blame all those who didn’t stop it …
Brave honest soul - wish them the best
I find that many detrans people change their fashion styles so I love that Robin has kept his style.
Robin- thank you for sharing your story, for being courageous enough to do it. And Ben- as always, you’re freaking awesome. Lots of love to you both 💛
As a bisexual, I have no issue with alternative sexuality but I'm very skeptical of transgenderism. I don't think gender or sexuality works that way.
Great interview - I enjoyed the two of you discussing Robin's story.
well done Robin, you really are living your authentic self now, kudos.
These poor kids. They were born after the time gay way no longer an issue. The left has a lot to answer for.
He was born in the 90’s, being gay was definitely still an issue
@@Wild_flower_415 it wasn't in the UK by the end of the 90s it didn't matter to the majority of people and institutions
@@gavinsimmons960 no bullying in schools, nothing? I don't buy it sorry
@@Wild_flower_415 no bullying at all can't be achieved ever, it's not how humans work, but buy the end of the 90s the majority of people just didn't think your sexual preferences were a big deal, its got a lot worse since then and we have gone backwards as a society things that didn't seem important anymore race, gender and sexuality are now the most important things about a person, did we still have things to improve and work on, yes, but the direction of travel has been going backwards since
@@gavinsimmons960 Sorry I don't buy that school kids wouldn't have bullied the heck out of a kid in the UK for being gay in the 90's. I was in Finland in the 90's, pinnacle of progressivism/liberalism, people were still very cruel about gayness back then, especially kids.
I loved hearing from this young man, Benjamin - thank you!
Honor is mine, Devin :)
So interesting (or is it just me? 🤔) that so many more Brits “see the light” and realize this transitioning thing is a scam…
My pet theory is that Brits are more cynical and grounded than Americans ('based' as the cool kids say) and less prone to zealous righteousness about the latest social cause.
People in the USA often seem to be overly earnest about things--whether they're conservative/evangelical types, or atheistic social justice crusader types. It might come from the Puritan heritage, or the fact that North America is a big resource-rich continent with few neighbours and doesn't really have to pay attention to the rest of the world much, so inconvenient reality doesn't smack the USA in the face as often as it does other countries.
In the UK, and in Australia where I live, anyone being overly earnest comes across as naive, annoying or up to something, and gets the piss taken out of them, i.e. they're cut down to size by acerbic wit. A phrase like "living your authentic self" sounds distinctly American and makes a lot of people roll their eyes.
Or maybe it's just because Brits (and Aussies) swear a lot more. It's harder to dismiss the fundamentals of biological sex when all our favourite swearwords rely on them. 😇
@@SchrodingersTransCat love your wording, and being a foreigner myself, agree with you, thanks for the enlightenment ⚡️
BTW Helen Joyce covers this much more eloquently (and accurately) than I did in her book 'Trans', near the end.
@@SchrodingersTransCat Ah! Thanks for the tip…😃
@@danae2882 Though I have to say that recent events in Australia (the Katherine Deves media circus) show that we're a few years behind the UK in waking up to what's going on ...
It broke my heart when he said "we're all lost boys" about his server.
With out stroking ego too much, i believe Benjamin is one of the best interviews I've watched, hes method of slofly calmly spoken chat works so well at letting the interviewie tell their tales.
Thank you for this moving story. Of course the cult would say you were never a 'real trans' to begin with, but that's how they reframe detrans stories. All the very best wishes to you.
Transition and even just identifying m2f or f2m is portrayed online as the perfect solution to confused feelings, depression, and anxiety. Nothing is mentioned any longer about the trauma of bodies and brains adjusting to puberty, life as an adult and life generally, it's all put down now to gender confusion etc. I've seen over the last few years a massive increase in young people in secondary schools saying they are now wanting to be the other gender, or are non-binary, or are gender fluid, and that's nothing to mention the addition of such a wide spectrum of sexual identities. All these are seen as more socially acceptable in some ways than being a straight kid just dealing with life. Detransitioners are seen as an enemy to those narratives, and are almost refused a voice online, so it's good to see someone standing up and saying that medical procedures and hormones won't automatically solve the problems or change the feelings of confusion. And it's interesting that you both mentioned the idea of it catching, as within my daughter's school friendship group of approximately 20, they are all changing their names, sexual identities and gender identities... And it's hard to know how much of that is fuelled by social media and peer pressure, and how much is genuine! As if teenagers don't have enough pressure on them without the added pressure of trying to work out if their sex matches their gender, especially with the increased ease of gettig hormones which are not yet tested to find out their long-term side effects and damage!
Sorry but this shows terrible parenting....too much time alone on the Internet on a juvenile brain....parents have a lot to answer for. .these days most think their kids are their friends
This was a brilliant interview.
Glad it touched you!
@@BenjaminABoyce that's the right word!
Sex with OCD is difficult and should be talked about more
solid interview - thanks
Can someone pls tell me how to watch/spell macaters ? Meecaters? Mechater ? Detrans video.. can’t figure it out..
MisterMetokur
@@gwelym ahh thank you
I haven’t got far into the video yet, but, off topic- yknow, it would be kinda nice someday to have someone listen to me as intently as Benjamin listens to his guests.
Who possibly could have thought that there might have been negative outcomes by vilifying masculinity? Here is another example of a gender identity crisis that requires interviewing the one prominent parental unit in order to fully understand how this situation came about. There were so many clues whenever Robin made mention of his mother and his anxieties about displeasing her
@Flik AM Yes, it's also complicated by feminist apologists
@Flik AM "he was exposed to violent stepdads" and such exculpatory use of the passive voice, too
@Flik AM I'm not even disputing that he was bullied. His height alone placed him on the lowest rung of the pecking order. Yet it's rich that you accuse me of bias while you willfully ignore the implication of his mother's culpability in her choice of the men whom she brought into her life and the consequences on Robin. White knighting is its own bias. Again, the full story cannot be told until the mother's involvement is fully examined. I listened to a young man who quite likely used transition as both an escape from and a pathetic attempt to placate his his mother's failure at finding a man to satisfy her demands
This is where I get stuck. Is it truly what we’ve been told AGP is, if it can be induced or triggered by an emotionally abusive mother? I guess what I’m thinking is that some boys are born with a predisposition to react in certain ways to trauma during childhood, but I don’t think it’s as simple as Blanchard has stated, where AGP is something specifically that males are born with a predisposition to develop. I think it’s quite likely that there’s some genetic predisposition(likely to OCD or ADHD) that makes some boys react to trauma and abuse by developing paraphilias. Some people are obviously more resilient when it comes to trauma, and some, far less. And I think it can be difficult to get an accurate account of what childhood was like, especially from older men, because they have experienced so much pressure to ignore or reframe their traumas. Nobody escapes it unscathed, but what could lead one man to develop AGP, in terms of trauma, might just turn another man into someone who can’t maintain relationships because of avoidant personality or relationship style. The internet has changed people, but also, we are better able now to see what life is like for so many more people than ever before, because it exists.
@@annarboriter it’s generational trauma. How can a woman be held accountable for bringing bad men into the lives of her kids, if she too, was abused as a child? If you think about it like this, it becomes hard to really pin blame on anyone. But, I think that if more awareness were brought to the absolutely deleterious effects of GT, then maybe a mother who had a slightly troubled childhood, could learn how to cope with that, and that if she doesn’t, she’s likely to inflict even more trauma onto her kids than she experienced. Unfortunately, and apparently, having generations of people being totally messed up is beneficial to oligarchs, so I don’t see that happening. As far as trans, and what leads males and females to experience great stress over their seggsed bodies, I feel it is firmly rooted in trauma, for all who medicalize especially, and the most in tune group(feminists) on the issue of trans are also some of the most traumatized people out there. They still don’t think boys can be affected by abuse, had they lack a lot of true empathy and compassion for FtMs(their sisters), and refuse to believe they transition for reasons aside from “internalized lesbophobia”. Not all feminists, as a qualifier, but many of them. It’s not looking hopeful for future generations(starting with younger millennials). Think about the huge rise in adults being diagnosed with autism or ADHD, when most of them probably have a trauma based disorder. It feels intentional, as ASD and ADHD in adults can be medicated(antipsychotics for ASD, and a whole lotta stuff for ADHD) and the symptoms allowed to proliferate, leading to greater wealth for the .01%, while treatment of actual trauma based disorders consists of very long term CBT and/or DBT. Which makes more money for the very rich?
Robin is awesome!
Cooking is not a gender thing its a people interest so wanting a toy kitchen is not odd … they have them in preschool and kindergarten class rooms and ALL CHILDREN ENJOY THEM
What a great guy. He’s right, the hatred for gender nonconformity is one of the big issues. The fact that feminine men feel like they must be women.
im a little guy with a racecar bed (it's just NYC themed i swear)
Do you have a cb radio to talk to the other racecar beds?
@@mcroot87 😂
He sounds genuinely brainwashed.
When they become adults. I hope they remember who brainwashed them. They need to be held accountable for that .
I was there on 4chan lgbt during 2015 on. I went from a lonely boy to a transgirl. There was and still is an incredibly competitive streak hence why i felt pressured into getting vaginoplasty, getting a husband, sleeping around, all to feel like more of a real girl than anyone else. I physically can't detransition now, even my birth certificate says female, and the fact i hsve lady parts, i wouldn't want to detrans anyway, im used to this now.
Autism can make it harder for people to see themselves in their peers, a slight feeling of being different is thus common amongst autistic people.
Add onto that the idea that this difference could be because of transgenderism and you have a recipe for disaster.
Still not as harmful as the way they now propagate that if you have (any) body discomfort or self-esteem issues, it could be because you are transgender.
A friends son was very short, as well, entering middle school. He is now in 10th grade, and is 5’10” & still growing.
Males can often go through puberty later, &/or growth spurt
The UK is absolutely special for bullying in general, even among girls and women, but perhaps especially among boys/men. I don't know where it comes from, I even tried to investigate it, but there isn't a lot of research on that. Other European countries definitely don't seem to have this degree of bullying.
Robins twitter says he's relapsed. Does that mean regarding everything he said here or no?
Fantastic guest, funny, open and interesting top lad with typical British wit
I’m kind of confused about what adults expect to gain, as far as support, if they get an autism diagnosis. For people with very high functioning ASD, which typically only displays itself by way of trouble with reading social cues, especially non verbal, the best “treatment” is actually interacting with people, face to face. Having an official diagnosis isn’t necessary for CBT. You can just tell your therapist you think you may have autism. The goal of early intervention/ABA is to get a lower functioning autistic to where Robin is, or close to where he is. I don’t think there’s a connection between ASD and trans ideation, especially in girls, but rather, there’s a connection between the need to have a label for yourself, and trans ideation. Truly autistic people don’t care much about their autism, or think about it, or want other people to know about it. However, when trauma is thrown into the mix, which kids with ASD probably are more prone to experiencing, that can certainly lead to all sorts of identity problems. But it’s not autism alone.
The relief that comes with a diagnosis, finally understanding why you're not like other people, can be a powerful motivation. Self-diagnosis is unreliable, but so is a diagnosis from a therapist who believes uncritically in the theory of high functioning autism. If you're high functioning, is there anything really wrong with you except being different?
I believe the entire basis of autism as a disease and 'neurodiversity' is suspect. Asperger was working in the Third Reich, when a child not joining in with the compulsory fun of the Hitler Youth was considered pathological. He worked in the Am Spiegelgrund clinic where disabled children were murdered by their doctors on a routine basis. His theories are long overdue for critical examination.
I think some women feel better once they get an ASD diagnosis because it can be harder to detect in females. It may never have occurred to them to consider it as a possibility, because until recently it was associated in the popular mind with males. They just felt all their lives that they were 'not normal' in some way without being able to figure out what the issue is.
That said, I have strong reservations about 'seeking out' a diagnosis. It sounds eerily similar to seeking out a trans diagnosis ... in that you've already come up with the answer before you ask the question, and you're determined to find a doctor who will give you the answer you want.
@@SchrodingersTransCat tru and I don't know what I expect to gain as an adult other than closure. I tend to overthink everything I do and feel the need to make excuses for anything socially abnormal.
Youre mostly wrong but a few ok points. C.B.T. is infamously ineffective with autism...though I was a researcher assistant in a PhD about it. As an autistic person myself, I have Aspergers but should be on benefits. We get exhausted masking and meeting demands met in the way NTs see them done in a certain time. We often have comorbidities, I have dysautonomia, celiacs, POTS snd SPD and it wears me out doing 40 hr a week jobs. People with intellectual disabilities that have no physical issues get instant disability passes. Depends on which country's rights youre under too. It really sucks. For many it can be debilitating like fibromyalgia is...while others just have social issues...never assume our struggle.
@@sarahharris2729 Seems you think you've got the world figured out. Those who you consider normies don't ever have fatigue, chronic illness, depression, anxiety etc. They have boundless energy and love to work 40+ hours a week in their dream job.
No girls allowed , I love that 😂.
What a complex, strong, honest , beautiful and very funny man . Good luck with your fight against US big pharma a❤
I’m curious, not necessarily from Robin, do men with autogynophilia have the desire to be desired by men in the way that women desired to be desired by men?
I would imagine it’s not in the same way, as even female and HSTS male seggsuality are very different(despite what the HSTS think). From what I gather, the AGPs who actually do strongly desire male attraction, it’s on a much much more seggsual, often degrading level. And it’s much more common among younger AGPs, or at least they are more comfortable with being with men. Non disordered women want men to be attracted to us for all the reasons. If we know a guy only wants to sleep with us, that’s usually a turn off.
AGP males sometimes have what Dr Ray Blanchard called pseudobisexuality. We like being desired by men because it makes us feel 'like a woman'. This can be stereotypically romantic (chocolates, flowers, etc.), or it can be full-on graphic. However, the man in the fantasy is often a faceless prop. We're not really interested in his personality or his hot bod--we're interested in how he makes *us* feel.
Unfortunately, we AGPs sometimes confuse our own feelings of being desired in this way with how females feel. In fact, we often convince ourselves that our AGP is actually 'female sexuality' and evidence that we have female brains. There's a notorious, flimsy academic study by Charles Moser (2009) that supposedly proves that most women experience AGP. It gets waved around triumphantly by activists as 'debunking' Blanchard and confirming that they're women on the inside.
What females do experience has been studied in sexology as 'erotic self-focus'. It's a woman's enjoyment of knowing that her partner desires her, feeling alluring and confident, etc. (such as when putting on lingerie in anticipation of a date). But it doesn't usually involve getting aroused by getting your period, or ironing, or putting on your boring underpants in the morning ... all of which are things that can be a turn-on to an AGP male.
@@katieandnick4113 "If we know a guy only wants to sleep with us, that’s usually a turn off."
I recall one male poster on the internet saying cynically, "If you only want sex from a woman, you have to convince her you don't just want sex. Then you get sex."
@@SchrodingersTransCat that seems pretty common sense, I would think. But it won’t work well with teenagers and women who insist on waiting a while before they sleep with someone. Though, the advent of internet p0rn0graphy has completely taken away the best “tool” girls and women had at their disposal, to make sure a guy actually cares about them before they invest in him emotionally and physically. I did have seggs early, but got into a long term(9 years) relationship within a year. I didn’t “make” him wait for seggs either, but I could tell that wasn’t all he wanted, and it worked out for a long time. I’d say that it’s always been normal, common, whatever, for teenagers to have seggs with different people, and not behave totally responsibly. But now, grown women have absolutely nothing, no way of gauging if this guy is gonna treat her well long term, aside from the fact that most women are emotionally damaged in some way, and aren’t good pickers to begin with. It’s very scary, Schro, the way kids are treated by the adults that are supposed to protect them. I can only do my best with my kids, but I’ll be sending them into a world full of people whose parents didn’t keep them safe, and they will turn that trauma on other people, including my kids(but mostly their own kids, if they have them). It’s so dark.
Can anyone completely not relate with the experience of being socially conscious before puberty?
It seems like every aspect of child development is being medicalised for profit.
It’s crazy looking at this as a 33 year old. This SO could have been me if I was younger just the other way around as I’m a woman. I was in insular nerdy forums online at that age too. I was also on Pokémon forums but before all this.
What is that restaurant scene that is showing at 58:07? Is it a troll intervention?
It’s from the Wolf of Wall Street. Coke and …
Is anyone else having trouble viewing all the replies to comments on this video? It'll say "View 4 replies," but when you click on it, only one or two replies appear. Or "View reply" but nothing shows up at all. It's been happening off and on over the last few days--sometimes they're visible and sometimes they aren't.
I can also see more comments when logged in than when logged out, but still can't see all of them.
Yeah that's happening for me too, confused about why. Are they comments pending for approval by UA-cam or something...?
It could easily be that the phantom comments are bot comments that have been reported and flagged for manual review.
At the top of the comments there is an option to "Sort by". The default is "Top Comments". Change it to "Newest First" and a lot of the "invisible comments" will appear as if by magic :-)
@@Genderwang Just tried that and it didn't work. 🤔'Newest First' does show a few *comments* you can't see sorting by 'Top Comment' ... but the invisible *replies* are still invisible. For instance, one of my own comments here on gynaecomastica says 'View 4 replies', but when I click on it I can only see 3. One of Cynthia Johnson's comments is giving me the same trouble. And I just noticed it happening on another channel where I'd previously been able to see all the replies in a thread, but now can't see one of them.
@@SchrodingersTransCat This started happening to me on several channels recently. Refreshing my browser reveals some of them sometimes. It's very annoying!
Robin is a lovely young man. Bright and down to earth. He will be fine now, he’s survived this horrible cult and thankfully the risky black market drugs he went on. I hope he is self accepting of his homosexuality.
Robin, defo cool in my book too.
It sounds like the security guards were making sure he was okay, no? They asked him if he is alright, after entering the male's toilets? Maybe think he was a girl?
I blame the Internet. 😳
Not directly related but last night I was curious about homicide and gender statistics after watching a video on "Dr" Hazard and starvation heights. "Evil men" are as dangerous as evil women. Very interesting stuff... And interesting calmversation.
I feel for this man, he's had an awful experience, and I really hope he goes on to have a successful and happy life. Im pleased he has realised that male norms need to change to accommodate guys who present in different ways. What concerns me is that he has some very odd ideas about women. This idea that women cry all the time and are over-emotional just isn't correct; it's another stupid stereotype. He admits being subjected to violent and abusive porn from a very young age and being groomed by trans identifying males online yet blames women for his issues and his wish to escape masculinity. His ideas about women and feminism seem very confused; feminists call out 'toxic masculinity'. That doesn't mean all men are rapists, it's calling for change to a toxic form of masculinity which is abusive to society.
The notion that men have to be tough and aggressive and control others, that they should demand sex 24/7, use and abuse women and drink like fish with 'the lads' on a Friday night is at odds with the many men who dont behave in this way, but is hard to ignore when it's promoted in everything from film and music vids to advertising. That 'lad culture' stereotype is damaging to women and men. There is also a sinister side; males and females, adults and children are overwhelmingly abused and killed by males not females. Most women I meet have experienced some level abuse, he even describes his mother being abused by men but blames her 'poor choices', rather than recognising that the male is responsible for his behaviour. It is not his mother's fault that she is targeted by abusers. We live in a patriarchal society where men outnumber women in government and business, and therefore create the culture we are living in. We are also fed the line that children need 2 parents and that boys need men in their lives. .
Anyway, that said I hope he finds peace and acceptance and I for one love to see guys (& girls) who don't conform to sexist stereotypes, so keep on being I hope he carries on being non conforming.
Hey thanks for your kindness. I do just want to pick up on one thing you said - that I implied women "cry all the time and are over-emotional". I was asked about my experience when taking cross-sex hormones, and it's common for guys taking estrogen to move from aggressive outbursts of emotion like punching walls into being more teary. I mentioned that this was actually not my personal experience with estrogen, because I was already a teary guy and had been confused by male outbursts of aggression my entire life. Estrogen didn't change much for me in that regard - however in many other estrogenised males, this does happen.
If you're talking about another part of the conversation where I do make that generalisation, please point me to it.
Also, I agree. "Lad" culture is repulsive. Hell, having "passed" (at least in the eyes of drunken men at night clubs), I faced it head-on. I was happy during C*vid times to be able to complete my degree from home and get away from it all at university, where it is rampant.
I'm a biological woman and I cry very rarely. But for me, birth control pills cause crying spells and moody fits of anger. Hormones do affect behavior- especially when not natural. I'm not surprised that estrogen has the same effect on males but amplified, as they shouldn't have nearly the levels females have. I think that's what he was trying to say. That the HRT made him cry more and experience more mood swings, which are known side effects of taking synthetic estrogen.
it is socially acceptable to shame and ridicule men while women must be believed and understood, this is defiantly one of the factors to why detransed men arent talking
Nice interview, no disrespect intended but it was kind of funny how many stereotypes he fell into, computer scientist, speed runner and the typical trans past also.
I was briefly FTM and you just got me thinking. I used to fit the "Aiden" mold. Anime fan, autistic, mid 2000's style, cat lover, Pokemon fan, possible lesbian, (ended up being bi) "boys can like girly stuff too" cope, and admirer of gay male culture. A psychologist should write a book with up to date psychological profiles to estimate risk factors for gender dysphoria.
I've been working at a progressive summer camp since 2014. And that first summer there was a decidedly anti-male vibe there. I noticed this during the two week training before the camper kids arrived. I even said to some people, you are putting out a very negative vibe about men to very impressionable young male staff members. There was one lesbian singer who actually preformed a song for the entire staff (over 200 people) about how toxic men are. I even joked (based on truth) with my family when the subject of camp came up that I was spending a lot of time defending straight, white males. That sounded hilarious to say out loud at the time. Anyway, I thought, back then, it was just an alternative, summer camp culture vibe that was kind of contained there. That camp had a long history of welcoming the LBGQ community, to the point where it became the dominant culture. And many straight people complained to me in private that they felt the camp climate was hostile to straight people. And I pointed out that camp was a special environment where the LGBQ people could have a dominant culture and the rest of the world wasn't that welcoming, so we straight people could/should allow them this space. But since I have been hearing from all quarters, people pointing to 2014 as that pivotal moment we as a society went off the rails into wokedom. I remember also talking to a lot of young SJW people that summer about MLK and how we should be judging people by the content of their characters not the color of their skin. And they looked at me like I had nine heads - they had no idea what I was talking about. So now, even as we are telling young boys that they are toxic and 'rapey' we are telling young girls they don't have to take even the slightest responsibility for their own safety - they can wear what they want, take their tops off at rock concerts, bend over in short shirts in no underwear to speak of, get drunk and pass out in young men's beds and it's all fine. If anything happens to you girls, it's the rape culture's fault. I don't know how we can re-weave society into something that makes sense. Maybe Benjamin can get Camille Paglia on. She had some very good insights into this mess, particularly about how we are raising young women. And I haven't heard from her in a few years, I bet she has a lot more she could say now.
You are way off base. Wanting to make girls responsible for rape again. And Camille Paglia no less. You ain't slick. Your views are part of the problem and people can tell. Your first giveaway was using wokeism, don't you know that word has been co-opted by the reactionaries to mean the opposite of what marginalized black people were using it to mean? Now it's a blugeon used by corporations and the right cynically to do the things they've always wanted like woke bombs and woke = fake capitalism. Sheesh.
@@TestTest-ft9xh I didn't say they were responsible for rape, I said they were responsible for their own safety. Kind of like stepping into a crosswalk and expecting the law of physics to instantly cease and speeding cars come to a halt. Sure drivers 'should' see you, sure they 'should' be proceeding with caution, sure they 'should' be ready to stop, and of course people 'should' be obeying the law. It's completely crazy to be telling young girls that it's perfectly okay to put their well-beings at stake based on what other people 'should' be doing. That's a lot of shoulds to be risking your life on. Better to just make it a rule never to step in front of moving vehicles. Cause it's cold comfort to 'be in the right' when you are dead, and it's always unreasonable, if not down right insane, to expect that anyone will ever care more about your safety and well being than you do. Better safe than sorry, especially when at a serious physical disadvantage. When you can't fight your way out, best to avoid the situation in the first place. This is just pure common sense 101. Sad these things even need to be said. And one last but very important thing, the law cannot prevent evil, it can only punish it. So for your own sake best to keep your wits about you and avoid it as much as possible. We don't have to let young girls learn the hard way that no one can protect their safety as well as their own good sense, and suffer the consequences of living the rest of their life with a crushed spirit. Even if 99 out of 100 guys are decent and respectful of women, it only take one to ruin your life. And you better believe that one predatory creep is just wait for a young girl to let her guard down and wander away from the herd. And the time to discover who that 1 in 100 is, is not when you are trapped in a bad situation and it's too late.
@@cynthiajohnson9412 I was disturbed a couple of years ago by something commentators kept saying after sexual assault / rape cases: "We need to make it clear to men and teenage boys that rape isn't okay." As if people only do bad things because they're naive and misguided.
I was like, "A rapist *knows* it's not okay! He just doesn't care! Do you think people rob banks because they think it's okay?"
Stop victim blaming. Women from babies to old ladies are raped and abused by males regardless of their attire. It's not girls that need educating, it's boys. Most don't believe that no actually means no. The growth of violent, abusive porn on the Internet, that boys are watching from pre-puberty doesn't help, neither does the majority of music videos with ½ naked women gyrating around and fawning over, fully dressed males. Most assaults and rapes happen indoors not outside and 80- 90% involve someone the victim knows. Being raped is never a woman's fault.
@@joannayoung4578 I never said it was a woman's fault, but a woman is responsible for her own safety, cause the reality is no one else is going to do it, nor could they. And a woman does that by being smart and avoiding potential bad situations where she is exceptionally vulnerable. Your reasoning is so fundamentally flawed. Seriously, it like stepping into traffic and expecting cars to instantly stop. All the education on safe driving isn't going to change the laws of physics or circumstances of reality, and as I said before it only takes one bad driver and you are dead. And all the moaning about how that one driver should have been better educated ain't gonna bring you back from the dead. And reality doesn't care whether you think it's fair or you think it should be otherwise. Reality will flatten you if you aren't careful - so be careful - or hire a 24/7 body guard. Your choice. P.S. It's beyond hilarious to the point of absurdity, that young women think that their righteous bitching is gonna change a circumstance that has existed through all of human history. As if people needed to be educated as to the differential in vulnerability between the sexes and we just needed your in-born wisdom on equity to enlighten us. The arrogance is astounding and on par with the anger that accompanies that collision with reality - that isn't going to change regardless of the level of screeching. It's just isn't, and you can shoot me as the messenger if it makes you feel better, but it still isn't going to make the truth more palatable.
Is it possible that some of these on-line 'gamer' people could be drug dealer/pharmaceutical reps. or have I gone completely round the bend? Cause I can't help but be suspicious when all roads lead to one destination and that destination just happens to have a profit motive attached.
I've heard rumours of this nowadays but I don't think this was the case when I started transitioning in the early 2010s
@@niwatori3963 I don't know, seems to me the drug companies hit the ground running on this. I have business degree and maybe things have changed a bit since I went to school, but I don't think big companies are that responsive to market changes....unless they've had a hand in shaping the market. It would be interesting to see when the research and development on these hormone drugs took place and see marketing memos from that time period. Companies don't develop drugs without a bead on the market and an angle how to market them. I'm sure there are people we can point to who did for hormones what Edward Bernays did for the marketing of cigarettes.
Wouldn't surprise me, but I doubt they'd need to recruit
@@OrwellsHousecat I'm old enough to remember the days before drugs were allowed to be advertised. Back then we had prominent people like Ralph Nader who were actually trying to protect the innocent consumer from undue influence of advertising and marketers pushing products that weren't really good for people. Now prescription drugs are ubiquitous in society. Even as far back as 1988 in the family movie 'Big' Elizabeth Perkins makes a joke when she thinks that Josh's emotional problem is a recent break-up, she quips isn't that what Xanex is for. I don't think this is an accident or the natural progression of society that using drugs to solve every emotional problem has been 100% normalized, to the point where it's almost considered a foolish waste of time to sort through one's own emotional problems without chemical help. We've been carefully taught to think that way by powerful forces who make a billions by fanning the flames of our problems. They aren't in the business of solutions and neither are our mental health professionals (I know they are getting paid by drug companies), because if you cure someone you lose them as a customer - bad business model. P.S. There was a big article in the New Yorker in the summer of 2019 written by a woman about her struggle to get off anti-depressants. All, or nearly all, the people in the hierarchy of medical review for these drugs are taking them themselves.
@@cynthiajohnson9412 I know plenty of mental health professionals - that's where I first noticed the ideology creeping in. Many of them are so focused on feelings and stories that they are almost completely devoid of critical thinking, others are coerced by their professional organisations.
Nawww, I want to take Robin home and look after him like a pet. What a lovely honest soul. I feel like I'm listening to a genuine seeker when he speaks.
this comment has brought me great joy
@@niwatori3963 why?
@@jdevil8877 it was wholesome (i am robin)
Oh, I did wonder if it was you.
I feel a little awe-struck now that you've confirmed. Um, hello Robin. 😊
I really enjoyed your perspective. I'd like to know if there is anywhere apart from twitter (as I don't have it) that I could follow you? I think seeing your further evolution could be really illuminating for myself and others as you're in a unique position and appear to connect many dots outside of the trans debate. I would especially like to know more of your thoughts around male autism and its manifestations under different environmental pressures.
Anyway, I hope to hear back from you on this thread, and also to gain more access to you. I live in New Zealand so I don't mean physical access, just in case I have "come on too strong".. I'm autistic as f*ck also lol, so yeah... Awkward
@@jdevil8877 hahaha well unfortunately i'm not on any other public platforms than twitter (seriously unfortunately - what a terrible website. i don't know any good alternative for microblogging, though). if you want to contact me personally then if you go to the "about" page on my youtube channel then you can get my email address, but i don't think that's what you're after.
29:55, he makes such a good point, and I think it also applies to girls. In fact, I am sure of it. So tired of hearing women say girls watching, from an outside perspective, men being terrible, can cause ROGD. That’s just not true. Not only do they have to experience the horribleness of men(and boys) personally, but they have to experience in a very specific way. Maybe, because most of the women who posit that, have experienced a great deal of trauma involving men, it’s a smaller leap for them to make in their minds. But speaking honestly as someone who never experienced male violence(or any violence) as a child, I know that taking testosterone, which causes you to go bald and grow a beard, having your breasts removed, and in some cases, your jenitals mootilayted, isn’t something that any female would even think about without very very very major stuff happened to them as children. I can’t believe I bought into the(pure) social contagion hypothesis for one second. Not to make light of anorexia, but medical transition, especially for females, isn’t in the same ballpark. It’s not in the same city.
Having a bad mother who makes bad choices is a type of female abuse which is more relevant than the male violence. Misandry comes in many forms - none of them helpful.
17:00
There is no female Mozart because there is no female Jack-The-Ripper.
The identity (and therefore the gender) of Jack the Ripper is unknown, but at least one suspect at the time was a woman named Mary Pearcey.
@@superscatboy You're being sarcastic right?
@@lancewalker2595 I'm stating two facts.
@@superscatboy It is possible that Jack-The-Ripper was female... that hardly makes it likely enough to invest belief in.
@@lancewalker2595 I'm not saying that I believe it, I'm just pointing out that you're stating an unknown as fact.
Coding brain? xD I am a software developer and i am a woman, i think more people should be ingroduced to programming in school to understand more that its rly fun and a lot of it is very easy to do. That way we would get more male and female programmers i think :)
I think that's awesome. You have no idea how much it upset me to see so few women in computer science, and that I, a male, was unjustifiably contributing to that number. It's one reason I want to be a teacher. STEM should not be "gendered" the way it is.
@@niwatori3963 It's completely organic why STEM is the way it is. If you subscribe to the theory of evolution, you will find that men evolved to be more interested in "things" (tools, objects), whereas women evolved to be more interested in people, generally speaking. The reasons for this are fairly obvious, and arose out of biological necessity. This is why you see more women in people-oriented fields like psychology and nursing, whereas you see more men in engineering. Even in egalitarian societies like Sweden, for example, where they have literally tried to pay women for years to study STEM in college, the women just simply do not want to do it and the numbers reflect this. You're not unjustifiably contributing to anything nefarious as you suggest, you as a male are simply biologically wired to be more interested in these fields than women are, generally speaking.
Love how he says he hopes he isn’t toxic but he had already been watching rape on tape and was obsessed with porn 🙄 ‘misandry’ isn’t real. Stop blaming tumblr feminism for patriarchy.
He was a 9 year old autistic kid and his usage of the "obsessed" term is referring to his mental illness, why are you being so spiteful to him
I enjoy your interviews though I have to concentrate on the interviewee because of your rocking, it is a bit distracting (sorry!).
Sorry I was really nervous :3
Have you ever had an hour long phone call in the bath? If so, you’re a girl.
Don't give us AGPs any ideas!
@@SchrodingersTransCat lol how many agps have a female friend they can call for over an hour - it’s a catch 22!
@@CharlieRabbit87 Oi! I've done the hour-long phone convo with plenty of female friends in my time. We're not all incels living under our mum's house. Some of us even shower. 😜
There was one girl in high school who did THREE-hour phone convos. I think she was using me as a therapist. Bit of a problem back in the days when the dial-up used the landline ...
@@SchrodingersTransCat well yeah you are the exception. You’d go on for ages on phone, I bet 😛. It’s strange tho bc I was wondering about gender roles in England (& Australia/NZ) for example & maaaaybe Benjamin is right- maybe British isles & compatriots are gender rigid?? Certainly if you dropped England into California gender roles would be an issue. I’m a (millennial, English) woman so I’m old school generally, as much as I’d like not to admit. I asked the men around me whether they were forced to play rugby & most said they weren’t depending on school… but most boys play rugby here, like NZ. There’s a difference between masculinity in America & uk (+compatriots) & I kinda think it’s just the difference between the beach boys & the Beatles.
@@CharlieRabbit87 Yeah, I was intrigued by the part about gender roles in the interview too. I'd imagine it varies a great deal between US states, though. What do you see as the major differences between US and UK in terms of masculinity?
I'm technically millennial but feel more like an honorary Gen Xer--born in the early 80s. I grew up in one of the more conservative Aussie states. In primary school I was hassled and called 'gay', but not for feminine behaviour--just for acting odd or weird or nerdy. (First day of high school I got called gay because the new school uniform included a tie and I'd accidentally tied mine too short. 🤨) Another common insult was 'stiff', which meant nerd or dork. There's a certain 'blokiness' that males are expected to perform, whether or not it comes naturally.
I may be suffering from sample bias, but a lot of North American guys (including Canadians) come across as wide-eyed kids. "Awesome!" and all that. Not that I'm not a big kid myself, but I wouldn't say I'm a typical representative of the blokes here in Oz.
I've never been too sporty, but in Australia it's in the air we breathe. There's always cricket and footy (rugby / AFL) on the radio and on TV, I used to do swimming squad for exercise after school, we all know which rugby team to barrack for, etc. Sport was generally compulsory in one form or another at my school, but only for formal lessons and school sports carnivals. We didn't have to belong to an after-school team or anything. (I went to a parish Catholic private school--one of the cheap ones that have traditionally served the working and middle class as an alternative to the public system, not one of the elite big-name private schools, although we have those too.)
Someone on Twitter claimed that many of the people cheering on Lia Thomas don't play sport themselves--and in fact hate sport or never think about it--so they don't understand why the unfairness matters to other people. In an Australian context that would be quite weird. I wonder if it might be an American thing. Is sport 'siloed' away from the rest of society as a more specialist kind of interest rather than pervading the culture?
(whoops I just went on for ages on the internet phone, didn't I 😅)
Who is this? Where's the introduction? Did this person just walk into your house and you started talking to him? I feel put off. I'm not particularly interested in these sorry losers, anyway. The only interesting thing they ever did is ruin their lives. If you're not even going to set the story up so I know what the situation is, I'm not going to listen. I know this sounds mean, but it's true.
I present a steep cliff into the unknown. If someone isn’t willing to venture, the loss is theirs.
@@BenjaminABoyce Unknown?!? LOL. First, part of being an adult is accepting that life is full of losses. Second, detrans people are the opposite of unknown. Always the same story: screwed-up, misfit kid, more than likely autistic; negligent, UMC parents who let said misfit stay on Tumblr 16 hours a day; the Glitter Family said misfit thinks will be so much better than his; mutilation, sterilization, regret. Rinse, repeat. Seen one, seen 'em all.
Losing you as a listerner seems like a net gain for this channel
Find the content that speaks to you!
Imagine dismissing someone's fascinating story because you've never heard of them.