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@X X rigth same im a good person for 20 years all i get is abuse next 60 years of my life i promise to myself that i will never be a good person to anybody
@@marinatebbenham4011 I know haha I commented that before they actually talked about the pandemic. I rly thought they were gonna breeze over current events but I was wrong
For someone with an anxiety disorder/ Pure OCD /intrusive thoughts...this is the most understanding video of my thought process that I have ever come across in my whole entire life. All of a sudden I feel much less alone x
Even if it's quarantine, don't mistreat yourself. Stay hydrated, try to normalize your sleeping schedule and do some basic exercises. There might not be a better time in our life to rediscover ourselves.
Agree. I'm alone in a flat, broken up with my wife after 10 years marriage (break up wasn't caused by isolation). At the beginning I was scared of loneliness. I realised it's perfect time to rethink everything. It's only me and my thoughts. I start every day with some yoga excersises, I do a lot of reading, play the guitar, try to work on my PhD and I have a lot of time to think about concept of life. Sorry for my lame english.
@@KingfisherLtd that's great to hear. Even if it can seem like a scary time, I've also realized we'll probably never have a time like this again, so we might as well use this opportunity to try out new things, exercise/meditate and practise more self-worth and compassion :)
@@KingfisherLtd I hope you're doing well with the new pattern interruptions. Made me think of the process of metamorphism - cocoon to butterfly. You have time, space and the attitude to evolve yourself! Keep it up brotha.
@@jeremytoon8106 Thanks. That's very accurate parallel with cocoon-butterfly metamorphism. We have married at a very young age. We were 22 years old kids without any adult life experience and shaped personalities. We have realised we are not on the same wavelength. Now I feel like I'm starting the process of being born again.
@@KingfisherLtd I'm sensitive to that after a 6 year relationship on my end. I complete loss of identity (initially) followed by a entirely new quest for self actualization. A difficult chapter of my life, but necessary for my evolution. Thoughtful song "Guaranteed" - Eddie Vedder.
6 Keys to Emotional maturity - 1. To motivate oneself and persist in the face of frustration. 2. To control impulses and delay gratification. 3. To regulate your mood and keep distress from swamping your ability to think clearly. 4. To empathize with others and feel hopeful 5. To positively influence the state of mind of other people 6. Make those around you to feel relaxed and calm. At best make them feel inspired and creative.
7. Forgive yourself when you have it hard or you fail to do any of the above. Understand you're not perfect and you don't need to be, trying is already a big achievement.
This helps a lot! Thanks! I just wanted to know what you meant by "delay gratification"? If you can put it into context, it would help me understand it better!
Fear Does Not Stop Death... It Stops Life. Yes we are going through tough times, and this time shall pass eventually, but I think the actual purpose of all these happenings is to reveal what we have been hiding under a facade of appearing nice and shiny on the outside. This is a crucial time to analyze ourselves, what we are actually made of. There's a saying that, "Circumstances don't make a man, they reveal him." Also, "You only get orange juice when you squeeze an orange". These times are testing the entire humanity, and we are only projecting what has been inside of us all along. Something to reflect upon.
Tough times all right, and for some of us, it was already tough enough. There are a few things to reflect upon over this way if you get time, certainly welcome to all. Great message friend.
@@ipage1 I agree... what you said does actually reflect a purpose to all this. May be the higher purpose of all this is nature trying to teach us that we have been destroying the balance and harmony for too long, that we have been too self-centric and abusing the resources around us, and that we need to change our ways immediately.
This video reminds me of the exercise that my therapist taught me to use whenever I feel extreme anxiety and depression. She said that first, we need to pick up the real CIRCUMSTANCE, then we go with the FACTS. Then since our THOUGHTS create our FEELINGS , and Feelings create behaviors, we can manage these feelings by focusing more on the FACTS and evaluating our THOUGHTS about them. I believe this is more of CBT method. Sometimes it works, sometimes it would be harder to defeat the negative thoughts but hey, it teaches us to identify and really go through the process of introspecting why we react on things and if they’re valid.
Your comment is more practically helpful than this video, so thank you for that! The video told me that I COULD remain emotionally mature, but not quite HOW I could remain emotionally mature.
That made me feel very vulnerable. The second negative sentiment of “this happening because I deserve it, it’s punishment” is derply rooted in me, and I feel excatly like a little fearful child that I, again, must soothe. For anyone struggling: it’s mode therapy, and it works. I’ve struggled with extreme anxiety and panic episodes since last July, but I’m fine now in the middle of a pandemic!
Wisdom that would have helped me in my early 20's to love and accept myself. But this is thought provoking all the same in middle age. Reassuring too. I love the gentle humour.
This is one of the most compassionate "School of Life" vids I've seen yet, and the timing of its release could not be better. I've (so far) watched it twice to buoy myself in these strange times.
It is so good to have Alain's calm voice and wisdom in this videos weekly, specially in these difficult times. I love this channel, it really brings light to our lives.
I appreciated the part near the end that said even when it really is the end of the world some people will be handling it better than others, that image of having the choice on how to respond to the worst case scenario was very eye opening for me. Thank you as always!
"Some of us belong to a social group politely called 'worriers' " Me: "WHOO, WARRIORS!... oh." I genuinely enjoy how subtlety you address the current situation :) Makes the message way more calming.
"The plague is not a punishment for anything deserved. That would be to imagine that the universe was moral or had some sort of design to it. But Dr Rieux watches a young innocent child die in his hospital and knows better: suffering is entirely randomly distributed, it makes no sense, it is no ethical force, it is simply absurd." - From The school of Life's video: Albert Camus - The Plague
..And we presume to know the true nature of the Universe from our tiny little perspective on a speck of dust spinning amidst infinite stars, none of which we have ever visited save our own? Ha. This certainty is an illusion.
@@p.rabbitt4914 Suffering is inevitable as a consequnce of pain. The choise may be in holding on to suffering or trying to block it instead of going trough it and hoping to come out on the other end.
what if it does have a design to it.....that to me is a more plausible assumption....made valid by the very nature of discovery itself, for every question we answer and every problem we solve more pop up. Every discovery fills us with more problems and unanswered questions. And at the end we assume we die AND we assume we live. This is a question with no verifiable answer thus far...
THANK YOU!!! I've been feeling SO alone surrounded by people FREAKING out on me for not being afraid and told that I am being reckless and not-sane for not taking part in the Feardemic.
“If the only thing that people learned was not to be afraid of their experience, that alone would change the world." - Sydney Banks or put another way “There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.” - William Shakespeare, Hamlet
I can't believe we liven a time were we have information like this, people really go through their own lives with so much baggage and pain and they think that's how they were born, I'm blessed to be born in this time period. Thank you school of life
:-D Charby can I steal your line to use when writing a fictional story of my own? Your sentence too reminded me of the time my last husband tried to start a fire in the wood cook stove of his cottage out at the lake with a beer can full of gasoline. By doing so he managed to not only set the wood in the cook stove on fire while his arm then was retracted with the can full of gasoline spilling out too onto the floor managed as well to set the whole cabin on fire too with the flames surrounding him cornered with no escape. He said in a calm voice, "Go save yourselves". I disobeyed my husband by remembering the last piece of wet carpet he had just thrown out the door onto the lawn the day before while it was raining and then storming out the door to grab it still sopping wet in order to beat out the flames and by doing so I stopped the fire so well we didn't need to call the local volunteer fire department in the nearest town. So I guess you could call me his first responder not called.
@@francesbernard2445 Please, be my guest, it is a reference to a joke I once saw, but I'm glad the wording was evocative enough to remind you of this event!
Wow! Thank you so much for this big lesson and cure for someone who came from a nuthouse with a narcissistic family. You found the right and compassionate words to lift a huge burden of my back. 🙏
How beautiful. I am going through a long distance breakup right now, as well as I have lost my apartment due to not being able to work because of the pandemic. On top of that, having to stay inside all the time and trying to occupy myself is incredibly hard. At first, it seemed like everything I knew to be true only a month ago had dissolved into thin air, and I couldn't do a damn thing about it. Now I'm slowly working through the pain, finding my footing again. It's video's like these that help when it seems like theres nowhere to turn. But really, I myself have gotten me to where I am now.
"We learn that the catastrophe we feared would happen has in fact safely already happened." - One of my favorite phrases ever, because for me it brings with it sweet tears of sadness and relief.
I will never understand how you are able to read my mind AND then soothe it with exactly what it needs to hear AT exactly the right time FROM across an ocean. --but I am supremely grateful.❤️
As a catholic seeing the virgin mary when he mentioned the "parental voice" just filled me with warmth and love. Truly with Christianity I've defeated the fear of death with the help of christ ❤️✝️❤️
When the video was uploaded, covid was definitely a thing. I work in the travel industry - by the time this video was out, I was already planning my career exit strategy and final vacation for the year because we all could foresee the great undoing that would happen to our careers (and plans for travel) due to the virus obviously going out of hand. You can also tell this video was made in haste to be put out in time because the animation quality is so much lower than the other videos - but it worked and it perfectly captured the feeling in the moment. Actually take a look at the video, it really is about us! This video helped me see that I didn't have to relegate 2020 as just another in-between year I've been used to experiencing, but I could really make do with what I was handed and still grow despite how it initially felt. And come on, your defense mechanism is not digesting and ignoring all the helpful information you've been introduced to and scrolling down to the comments section to commiserate? Take a second look at the video.
It didn't wipe us all out. It haven't killed mor people than, say, obesity. Why does obesity not convey the same terror and axiety? If coca-cola caused vocid, no one would care.
Vagabundork Chaos Magick-User it’s a plandemic and msm war machine is one of the main factors in there global fear mongering and hysteria inflicted on humanity
Isn't that excatly part of emotional maturity?? I.e., that you can precisely define your own emotion(s), and, weigh on how sound they are?? E.g, we knock our knees as kids, we cry, because, "It hurts, it well never stop, nobody loves me, the world is against me, look there's blood hence I'm dying, and wtf is gravity meant to be for/why can't we all just fly like birds??". We knock our knees as adults, "Damn, I'm an idiot." So what is it? We're all gonna die?? Or, we'll have to deal with the virus responsibly, in order not to let everything that makes societies run go inoperarative, which will come with a bundle of different and/or individual inconveniencis, including some rigors that mostly can be managed though?? ...
Covid-19 is pretty bad, compared to the flu, but it's nowhere close to threatening humanity as a whole. If anything, the biggest threat is leadership running society on margins, without buffer for crisis to pass without stressing every system.
@@haydentravis3348 Exactly - COVID wouldn't have been such a terrible thing if education on hygiene, infection etc. were better, and leadership were more prepared for crises outside of "shooting people who don't look/talk/pray like us". We're a society that is at such a level of knowledge that we had a vaccine for this thing researched in months. So society's failure to prepare was not down to lack of scientific knowledge, but lack of concern and imagination for anything other than generating profits on paper.
You are creating great resources for people. I remember learning from the school of life that an emotional meltdown is our chance to make a big or little change in our lives. To change the routine. Don't be afraid of it was an important message I learned from your videos. Emotional winters come and spring comes too.
"It feels natural to turn whatever is negative and might have been entirely accidental into a verdict on us...we hear a voice in our heads that at once adds immeasurably to the misery..." Oh yeah that one hits close to home.
*"The difference actually lies in the way each of us is able to interpret events* It's our choice how we want to face events, starting with our attitude/mindset. That is something basic, but that I tend to ignore so often. The School of Life is like that wonderful teacher/adult you've known or wish you'd known :)
I got touched :O. I could see the progress of the last years in my inner world watching this video. It felt like a prize for the hard work I've done in destroying those inner demons that were clouding my mind. Today even with the craziness that is going on I feel so calm and grateful for the lessons learnt during the dark period. Today I can be the child and the soothing adult with no judgement. Thank you.
@@eduardochavacano I am fairly confident it relates to being on holidays in a " cabin" ( house , tent etc ) and there is an extended bad weather ( rain, thunderstorm, snow etc ) and you are looking out the window, at all the things you hoped you would be doing, but can't. You're stuck inside. Being away from familiar surroundings makes it worse and it happens quicker than if you were in your own home . As eve m said " cabin fever has slowly crept in a month into quarantine"
Christopher Maurer Thanks! I see. And I may have cabin fever then... But no...the term has yet to invented to describe what I go through. Good thing I at least have data.
I thought the same, and a question arose inside my mind: will you be a warrior or a worrier? Thinking on my aging diabetic dad who also suffers from hypertension, I've got to be the first
April 12, 2020 Easter Sunday 10:52 AM I had just finished mopping when this was about to come to an end. Beautiful to listen to while doing chores or running errands.
I just cried. Was feeling like that this morning. And I keep saying my life has always been like this. Everything has always been Bad. Thank you. I'm definitely joining this community. It's just sad because I have always had the most amazing parents💕💕💕
@peachykeen08 i agree, &for the most part if one hass conversation with another they'll bring up the latest even if you'd prefer conversation about something else
It is important for us to stay composed in these worrying times. Firstly we should be grateful that we have food and shelter because most people don’t. Secondly just take precautions and just work on yourself from home. Meditate and reflect on your life. Focus on yourself and just pray for the best. Most importantly, Help each other !
This is one of the best videos that I've seen recently. I have created a "Psychology" playlist on youtube, and it s dominated by your videos. Amazing job. Thank you very much.
It's good that the length of this video is 11 minutes, not short like your usual 3 minute videos. medium lenth is important for more holistic overview. Thankyou The School of Life. I've learnt many things from you.
That's called catastrophizing. It's one of the behaviours they work on in CBT. I think it's useful even in some truly eschatological scenario. As the stoics say, there is no bad thing in this world that we can't make worse by how we handle it.
@Hey GUY! I don't think it's always necessarily trolling, especially for English. English is hard and has a lot of exceptions, irregularities, homonyms, homophones, silent letters, strange expressions, etc, etc ... It's ok and even nice when people point out the subtleties of the language -- provided it's done politely, of course.
I didn't realise this was new and towards the end I started thinking 'omg this really befits what we're going through at the moment' so I clicked on the comments to see how others might have noticed 🤦🏾♀️🤦🏾♀️ and I realised that it's only hours old! May I say, it's perfect!
This video said the perfect thing at the perfect time (April 2020.) Doubt this was a coincidence - it must have been produced in response to the crisis at hand. An act of heroism.
The School of Life, thank you so much for this wonderful video that helps many of us to find peace and hope within these moments of crisis. I really needed to hear that is everything will be OKAY regardless of the final outcome.
School of Life, I would love if you could put subtitles in other languages, especially Arabic and German. This will broaden up your audience and I can finally send these videos to my parents so that they can understand.
English is the most spoken language in the world, they can' t make subtitles for every other language, go to your settings and change it to your language.
I love this! Tweeted it out, I struggle a great deal with communicating with others, thank you for helping me grow and growing, applying knowledge doesnt end, we might not or I dont graduate from 4closure, jobs, health issues, its just part of life and its bearable and at times tough but I keep trying, growing and applying knowledge.
Safak Sahin our childhoods are our life’s foundation . I’ve been labeled an overprotective mother but I had my reasons , trauma which can happen to anyone . I believe today’s children are subjected to unnecessary trauma that is happening because of greed and corruption .
I had to remain emotionally mature in a crisis, from childhood onwards. It does wear you out. But then, there was a lot of violence we were subjected to, from a father who drank, but excused his violence toward us. I am often the target of people's anger now. I struggle with regulating my emotions. When you grow up in that sort of chaos, you learn not to explode at others...even at the cost of your own sanity...which has happened a lot.. ie psychosis. So many are living in a state of permanent trauma response...this society does not really support human needs for safety very well. Thanks for reading. I hope it helps someone.
It seems like a lot of people stop watching before 2:15. That's where he said there will be a time when a disaster does strike and you're prompted to go "ah ha! See? I told you so." This leads to losing faith in 'therapy' or preached wisdom. The point of this video is that many people add insult onto their own injury. They make matters bigger or worse for themselves on top of how bad things already are for them. They miss out on what they have left. They overlook how they could survive, workaround, or even thrive despite catastrophic disasters. You are much more resilient than you think when the worse has come to be. When the truth is, therapy doesn't (shouldn't) tell you you're wrong, but that despite these possible/undeniable disasters you still have some control and that you don't need to add insult to yourself on top of current injuries. A therapist should be teach this in a way that makes it easier for you to put into practice.
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Hi! Do you have podcast in Spotify?
It is the least we can do to say THANK YOU. For all of these years you have been giving us wisdom and serenity.
@@hendalessa6405 here to say exactly the same!
Cccvuc.
So the advice here is just calm down and pretend like someone is comforting you? What absolute garbage
"We can exist outside of our failures." So true.
*foolishness
No. Our failures folllow us everywhere.
Your wound is probably not your fault, but your healing is your responsibility...
Amen 🙏
Word!
So true
Yes.
Damn rigth💪🏻
@X X rigth same im a good person for 20 years all i get is abuse next 60 years of my life i promise to myself that i will never be a good person to anybody
" There isn't a disease that is going to ruin us. There is no looming financial crisis! The hotel door is harmless." The irony of this in 2020.
Literally came to comments for this
This video was posted in April...
@@evelyndill5688 But the disease was already circulating at that point
@@marinatebbenham4011 I know haha I commented that before they actually talked about the pandemic. I rly thought they were gonna breeze over current events but I was wrong
9:38 haha
For someone with an anxiety disorder/ Pure OCD /intrusive thoughts...this is the most understanding video of my thought process that I have ever come across in my whole entire life. All of a sudden I feel much less alone x
Even if it's quarantine, don't mistreat yourself. Stay hydrated, try to normalize your sleeping schedule and do some basic exercises. There might not be a better time in our life to rediscover ourselves.
Agree. I'm alone in a flat, broken up with my wife after 10 years marriage (break up wasn't caused by isolation). At the beginning I was scared of loneliness. I realised it's perfect time to rethink everything. It's only me and my thoughts. I start every day with some yoga excersises, I do a lot of reading, play the guitar, try to work on my PhD and I have a lot of time to think about concept of life. Sorry for my lame english.
@@KingfisherLtd that's great to hear. Even if it can seem like a scary time, I've also realized we'll probably never have a time like this again, so we might as well use this opportunity to try out new things, exercise/meditate and practise more self-worth and compassion :)
@@KingfisherLtd I hope you're doing well with the new pattern interruptions. Made me think of the process of metamorphism - cocoon to butterfly. You have time, space and the attitude to evolve yourself! Keep it up brotha.
@@jeremytoon8106 Thanks. That's very accurate parallel with cocoon-butterfly metamorphism. We have married at a very young age. We were 22 years old kids without any adult life experience and shaped personalities. We have realised we are not on the same wavelength. Now I feel like I'm starting the process of being born again.
@@KingfisherLtd I'm sensitive to that after a 6 year relationship on my end. I complete loss of identity (initially) followed by a entirely new quest for self actualization. A difficult chapter of my life, but necessary for my evolution.
Thoughtful song "Guaranteed" - Eddie Vedder.
6 Keys to Emotional maturity -
1. To motivate oneself and persist in the face of frustration.
2. To control impulses and delay gratification.
3. To regulate your mood and keep distress from swamping your ability to think clearly.
4. To empathize with others and feel hopeful
5. To positively influence the state of mind of other people
6. Make those around you to feel relaxed and calm. At best make them feel inspired and creative.
Authentic Self Guide is it OK if I copy your notes? Thanks dude lol
I'll try this,thank u
7. Forgive yourself when you have it hard or you fail to do any of the above. Understand you're not perfect and you don't need to be, trying is already a big achievement.
This helps a lot! Thanks! I just wanted to know what you meant by "delay gratification"? If you can put it into context, it would help me understand it better!
I tried so hard the keep to these keys... but the intensity of my depression caught up with me and I'm finding it hard to get out again...
I've been reading your book "The School Of Life: An Emotional Education" and it is absolutely terrific during this isolation
Great name u got
Fear Does Not Stop Death... It Stops Life.
Yes we are going through tough times, and this time shall pass eventually, but I think the actual purpose of all these happenings is to reveal what we have been hiding under a facade of appearing nice and shiny on the outside. This is a crucial time to analyze ourselves, what we are actually made of.
There's a saying that, "Circumstances don't make a man, they reveal him."
Also, "You only get orange juice when you squeeze an orange". These times are testing the entire humanity, and we are only projecting what has been inside of us all along.
Something to reflect upon.
Yess
Tough times all right, and for some of us, it was already tough enough. There are a few things to reflect upon over this way if you get time, certainly welcome to all. Great message friend.
Great point well made. A lot of self assessment is being done. Sending warm wishes to you all.
@@ipage1 I agree... what you said does actually reflect a purpose to all this. May be the higher purpose of all this is nature trying to teach us that we have been destroying the balance and harmony for too long, that we have been too self-centric and abusing the resources around us, and that we need to change our ways immediately.
@@duchessofdark wishing you health and wellness as well friend. Stay healthy and safe :)
Your videos should be broadcasted globally on the main national medias, everyday, on a perpetual basis.
“ Face catastrophe without catastrophizing ..” beautiful!
This video reminds me of the exercise that my therapist taught me to use whenever I feel extreme anxiety and depression. She said that first, we need to pick up the real CIRCUMSTANCE, then we go with the FACTS. Then since our THOUGHTS create our FEELINGS , and Feelings create behaviors, we can manage these feelings by focusing more on the FACTS and evaluating our THOUGHTS about them. I believe this is more of CBT method. Sometimes it works, sometimes it would be harder to defeat the negative thoughts but hey, it teaches us to identify and really go through the process of introspecting why we react on things and if they’re valid.
Thankyou for penning it down. I can hopefully start applying it in my life
Thank you for sharing this with us much appreciated.
This specific comment seems to be really helpful for me..
Thank you.
Exactly. Thank you for the nice explanation. I concur.
Your comment is more practically helpful than this video, so thank you for that!
The video told me that I COULD remain emotionally mature, but not quite HOW I could remain emotionally mature.
That made me feel very vulnerable. The second negative sentiment of “this happening because I deserve it, it’s punishment” is derply rooted in me, and I feel excatly like a little fearful child that I, again, must soothe. For anyone struggling: it’s mode therapy, and it works. I’ve struggled with extreme anxiety and panic episodes since last July, but I’m fine now in the middle of a pandemic!
"Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional."
Absolutely
The best line!
How is pain not suffering? That's baked into the definition.
@@tree-stufferBecause pain can also mean growth. You need pain to teach you things, and keep you alive. How you respond to pain is the difference.
Suffering is optional? Tell that to people with medical problems
Wisdom that would have helped me in my early 20's to love and accept myself. But this is thought provoking all the same in middle age. Reassuring too. I love the gentle humour.
This is one of the most compassionate "School of Life" vids I've seen yet, and the timing of its release could not be better. I've (so far) watched it twice to buoy myself in these strange times.
"meeting catastrophe without catastrophizing" 🙏🏻
It is so good to have Alain's calm voice and wisdom in this videos weekly, specially in these difficult times. I love this channel, it really brings light to our lives.
As someone who just found out my mum, who’s an nhs worker, and my brother both started having the symptoms today, i really needed this❤️
All the best to you anarcho. May you be well.
I hope your mother and brother and also you are all well now.
I cried softly a few times, peacefully, what a beautiful, well crafted and logical video. Thank you.
I appreciated the part near the end that said even when it really is the end of the world some people will be handling it better than others, that image of having the choice on how to respond to the worst case scenario was very eye opening for me. Thank you as always!
Me: Going through an Existential Crisis
My Phone listening to everything I say: Got you bro
I do, in the form of muddled ramblings that I call "poetry, art and music." It's not artistically profound, but I say everything I feel.
'Going through an Existential Crisis' Do you mean life?
"Some of us belong to a social group politely called 'worriers' "
Me: "WHOO, WARRIORS!... oh."
I genuinely enjoy how subtlety you address the current situation :)
Makes the message way more calming.
I thought he said that too haha
Worriers......come out and PLAYEEEE.....
True. Though I feel like you hear what you see yourself as the most. And then you replay it and hear warriors.
I heard the same
"There will be others greeting catastrophe without catastrophizing" Truly eye opening 😍
"The plague is not a punishment for anything deserved. That would be to imagine that the universe was moral or had some sort of design to it. But Dr Rieux watches a young innocent child die in his hospital and knows better: suffering is entirely randomly distributed, it makes no sense, it is no ethical force, it is simply absurd." - From The school of Life's video: Albert Camus - The Plague
😿🍀🗽🌈🌆
..And we presume to know the true nature of the Universe from our tiny little perspective on a speck of dust spinning amidst infinite stars, none of which we have ever visited save our own? Ha. This certainty is an illusion.
@@MegaJAK77 Pain is inevitable. Suffering is a choice.
@@p.rabbitt4914 Suffering is inevitable as a consequnce of pain. The choise may be in holding on to suffering or trying to block it instead of going trough it and hoping to come out on the other end.
what if it does have a design to it.....that to me is a more plausible assumption....made valid by the very nature of discovery itself, for every question we answer and every problem we solve more pop up. Every discovery fills us with more problems and unanswered questions. And at the end we assume we die AND we assume we live. This is a question with no verifiable answer thus far...
What a beautiful line “ some of us would be greeting catastrophe without catastrophizing things”
THANK YOU!!! I've been feeling SO alone surrounded by people FREAKING out on me for not being afraid and told that I am being reckless and not-sane for not taking part in the Feardemic.
“If the only thing that people learned was not to be afraid of their experience, that alone would change the world." - Sydney Banks or put another way “There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.” - William Shakespeare, Hamlet
I think of it as a perfect time to reassess my life. In "normal" times I rarely if ever think about my life because I'm too busy living it.
Sebastian Elytron amen!
Coming from someone who works at Target, I loved the toilet paper throne
I can't believe we liven a time were we have information like this, people really go through their own lives with so much baggage and pain and they think that's how they were born, I'm blessed to be born in this time period. Thank you school of life
9:15 "THIS IS FINE." Thought the dog to itself, as the inferno raged around it's placid demeanour.
Charby 4:25 Girl on right: Imma jemmy open this door raaargh!
Girl on left: Shit, I haven’t got a crow bar!
:-D Charby can I steal your line to use when writing a fictional story of my own? Your sentence too reminded me of the time my last husband tried to start a fire in the wood cook stove of his cottage out at the lake with a beer can full of gasoline. By doing so he managed to not only set the wood in the cook stove on fire while his arm then was retracted with the can full of gasoline spilling out too onto the floor managed as well to set the whole cabin on fire too with the flames surrounding him cornered with no escape. He said in a calm voice, "Go save yourselves". I disobeyed my husband by remembering the last piece of wet carpet he had just thrown out the door onto the lawn the day before while it was raining and then storming out the door to grab it still sopping wet in order to beat out the flames and by doing so I stopped the fire so well we didn't need to call the local volunteer fire department in the nearest town. So I guess you could call me his first responder not called.
@@francesbernard2445 Please, be my guest, it is a reference to a joke I once saw, but I'm glad the wording was evocative enough to remind you of this event!
I always get something valuable from SOL videos. Thanks to all who contribute. I'm very grateful. 💐
I love Alain's perspectives. Always helping me see situations through different eyes... I am grateful...
For me, Alain de Botton's voice is the calming voice! Thank you so much, The School of Life! An absolutely beneficial and amazing channel you are!
Wow! Thank you so much for this big lesson and cure for someone who came from a nuthouse with a narcissistic family. You found the right and compassionate words to lift a huge burden of my back. 🙏
How beautiful. I am going through a long distance breakup right now, as well as I have lost my apartment due to not being able to work because of the pandemic. On top of that, having to stay inside all the time and trying to occupy myself is incredibly hard. At first, it seemed like everything I knew to be true only a month ago had dissolved into thin air, and I couldn't do a damn thing about it. Now I'm slowly working through the pain, finding my footing again. It's video's like these that help when it seems like theres nowhere to turn. But really, I myself have gotten me to where I am now.
The Calm App
"We learn that the catastrophe we feared would happen has in fact safely already happened." - One of my favorite phrases ever, because for me it brings with it sweet tears of sadness and relief.
I will never understand how you are able to read my mind AND then soothe it with exactly what it needs to hear AT exactly the right time FROM across an ocean. --but I am supremely grateful.❤️
As a catholic seeing the virgin mary when he mentioned the "parental voice" just filled me with warmth and love. Truly with Christianity I've defeated the fear of death with the help of christ ❤️✝️❤️
Thank you! Needed to hear this today in the midst of all the chaos! Be well....
This video made a lot of sense.
I finally know why it is important to stay calm inside even if the outside world is chaotic
"There isn't a disease that's about to wipe us all out"
Covid-19:Please allow me to introduce myself
When the video was uploaded, covid was definitely a thing. I work in the travel industry - by the time this video was out, I was already planning my career exit strategy and final vacation for the year because we all could foresee the great undoing that would happen to our careers (and plans for travel) due to the virus obviously going out of hand. You can also tell this video was made in haste to be put out in time because the animation quality is so much lower than the other videos - but it worked and it perfectly captured the feeling in the moment. Actually take a look at the video, it really is about us! This video helped me see that I didn't have to relegate 2020 as just another in-between year I've been used to experiencing, but I could really make do with what I was handed and still grow despite how it initially felt.
And come on, your defense mechanism is not digesting and ignoring all the helpful information you've been introduced to and scrolling down to the comments section to commiserate? Take a second look at the video.
Weird to think it'll kill everyone. People have already survived
It didn't wipe us all out. It haven't killed mor people than, say, obesity. Why does obesity not convey the same terror and axiety? If coca-cola caused vocid, no one would care.
Vagabundork Chaos Magick-User it’s a plandemic and msm war machine is one of the main factors in there global fear mongering and hysteria inflicted on humanity
Isn't that excatly part of emotional maturity?? I.e., that you can precisely define your own emotion(s), and, weigh on how sound they are?? E.g, we knock our knees as kids, we cry, because, "It hurts, it well never stop, nobody loves me, the world is against me, look there's blood hence I'm dying, and wtf is gravity meant to be for/why can't we all just fly like birds??". We knock our knees as adults, "Damn, I'm an idiot." So what is it? We're all gonna die?? Or, we'll have to deal with the virus responsibly, in order not to let everything that makes societies run go inoperarative, which will come with a bundle of different and/or individual inconveniencis, including some rigors that mostly can be managed though?? ...
"there isnt some disease that'll wipe us all out"
*looks at the date this video was uploaded*
Yeah, when covid was already a thing. And five months later, we haven't been wiped out.
That affirmation did not age well...
@@SarahJeanOnly it is actually
Covid-19 is pretty bad, compared to the flu, but it's nowhere close to threatening humanity as a whole. If anything, the biggest threat is leadership running society on margins, without buffer for crisis to pass without stressing every system.
@@haydentravis3348 Exactly - COVID wouldn't have been such a terrible thing if education on hygiene, infection etc. were better, and leadership were more prepared for crises outside of "shooting people who don't look/talk/pray like us". We're a society that is at such a level of knowledge that we had a vaccine for this thing researched in months. So society's failure to prepare was not down to lack of scientific knowledge, but lack of concern and imagination for anything other than generating profits on paper.
You are creating great resources for people. I remember learning from the school of life that an emotional meltdown is our chance to make a big or little change in our lives. To change the routine. Don't be afraid of it was an important message I learned from your videos. Emotional winters come and spring comes too.
I'm so glad the school of life has remained so logical over this time
I particularly like the artstyle in this video, very sympathetic and expressive characters!
The full depth and timed allowed for this video is outstanding. Thank you Alain de Botton and School of Life.
"It feels natural to turn whatever is negative and might have been entirely accidental into a verdict on us...we hear a voice in our heads that at once adds immeasurably to the misery..."
Oh yeah that one hits close to home.
All I can say is just, "wow!" a video that will stand the test of time and something we must all come back to every once in a while!
*"The difference actually lies in the way each of us is able to interpret events*
It's our choice how we want to face events, starting with our attitude/mindset. That is something basic, but that I tend to ignore so often.
The School of Life is like that wonderful teacher/adult you've known or wish you'd known :)
Just Wow!!! So profound and something that I plan to come back to frequently...it just brings back my state of calm!! ❤️
I got touched :O. I could see the progress of the last years in my inner world watching this video. It felt like a prize for the hard work I've done in destroying those inner demons that were clouding my mind. Today even with the craziness that is going on I feel so calm and grateful for the lessons learnt during the dark period. Today I can be the child and the soothing adult with no judgement. Thank you.
I like how the character's hair is pink to mirror my impulsive hair dyeing while in isolation.
I agree i agree
Yup! I've been cutting my hair. It's getting pretty short!
Gabriella Travaline looks gorgeous from your profile pic!
Thank you. Your friends must be delighted. They are so lucky.
it is just unbelievable how you are able to put such complex idea in so little time. your speech always amazes me thanks.
After a long shift I needed to hear this powerful voice of wisdom. Thank you
Just what i needed as cabin fever has slowly crept in a month into quarantine. Thank you SOL ♥️
Wigga u gut d coruna?
what is cabin fever?
@@eduardochavacano I am fairly confident it relates to being on holidays in a " cabin" ( house , tent etc ) and there is an extended bad weather ( rain, thunderstorm, snow etc ) and you are looking out the window, at all the things you hoped you would be doing, but can't. You're stuck inside. Being away from familiar surroundings makes it worse and it happens quicker than if you were in your own home . As eve m said " cabin fever has slowly crept in a month into quarantine"
Christopher Maurer Thanks! I see. And I may have cabin fever then... But no...the term has yet to invented to describe what I go through. Good thing I at least have data.
@Reggie Cyde Jack Nicholson . Yes, I got the reference as soon as I saw your first comment . I haven't seen the movie but I've seen that clip heaps.
"Most of us belong to a social group called WARRIORS!"
"YEAAAAAAGHHHHHHHH!!"
I thought the same, and a question arose inside my mind: will you be a warrior or a worrier? Thinking on my aging diabetic dad who also suffers from hypertension, I've got to be the first
"Home of the Great Worrier Susano" is one of my favorite jokes in Okami
I heard it the same way the first time. Staying awake this time thru.
I heard "warriors" the first time too even though I knew he meant "worriers".
Anyways, happy mistake 😁
Im pretty sure he meant “WORRIERS”
It hits differently when u swear.
This video has arrived just at the right time of my life. Thank you.
So helpful. Thank you so very much for this video. You are doing an amazing work
April 12, 2020 Easter Sunday
10:52 AM
I had just finished mopping when this was about to come to an end. Beautiful to listen to while doing chores or running errands.
Going to watch this everyday. Thank you.
Wow. That was a lot to take in. Thank you for making this. Hope you are all safe and well. xx
I just cried. Was feeling like that this morning. And I keep saying my life has always been like this. Everything has always been
Bad. Thank you. I'm definitely joining this community. It's just sad because I have always had the most amazing parents💕💕💕
How a Stoic perspective is so wonderfully therapeutucal. Great clip!
I’ve listened ethics one over and over. This vid is saving me.
Number 1 way is not spend every waking moment consuming content about the crisis, because it doesn't often help
@Colleen Kelly 😁
@peachykeen08 i agree, &for the most part if one hass conversation with another they'll bring up the latest even if you'd prefer conversation about something else
Just as I am trying to choose my favourite SoL video, you upload this masterpiece. Thank you!
It is important for us to stay composed in these worrying times. Firstly we should be grateful that we have food and shelter because most people don’t. Secondly just take precautions and just work on yourself from home.
Meditate and reflect on your life. Focus on yourself and just pray for the best. Most importantly, Help each other !
What do you mean by "most people don't"? Most people do, according to statistics.
Thank you for your reassuring message.
- Don't forget to exercise and eat healthy, a strong immune system is the best bet
i tried exercising and eating at the same time and managed to break my legs. thanks internet stranger!
@@kombinatsiya6000 🤣🤣😂
Helpful
Also get enough sleep and do meditation regularly and spend time with friends. They all contribute to your well-being.
Always love your videos. Without fail, they give me a sense of calm.
As usual, your videos come up on my recommendations right on time. Thank you for your work!
For me, TSOL is that soothing voice I’ve been deprived from for so long
This is one of the best videos that I've seen recently.
I have created a "Psychology" playlist on youtube, and it s dominated by your videos.
Amazing job. Thank you very much.
Always a pleasure to take the time to find our inner calmness.
It's good that the length of this video is 11 minutes, not short like your usual 3 minute videos. medium lenth is important for more holistic overview.
Thankyou The School of Life. I've learnt many things from you.
This is the best channel on UA-cam, hands down. Life changing
How to not loose your mind would be a better headline.
*How not to LOSE your mind is even better, since "loose" is the opposite of "tight".
That's called catastrophizing. It's one of the behaviours they work on in CBT. I think it's useful even in some truly eschatological scenario. As the stoics say, there is no bad thing in this world that we can't make worse by how we handle it.
@Hey GUY! It goes to the bathroom and produces a lot of shit
@Hey GUY! I don't think it's always necessarily trolling, especially for English. English is hard and has a lot of exceptions, irregularities, homonyms, homophones, silent letters, strange expressions, etc, etc ... It's ok and even nice when people point out the subtleties of the language -- provided it's done politely, of course.
Excellent and thought provoking video. I am going to watch this again and learn and apply it to my life. Thanks.
Thank you The School of Life. You are the best.
This is excellent, so measured and needed right now. Thank you!
I didn't realise this was new and towards the end I started thinking 'omg this really befits what we're going through at the moment' so I clicked on the comments to see how others might have noticed 🤦🏾♀️🤦🏾♀️ and I realised that it's only hours old! May I say, it's perfect!
I know a number of people in life that need to see this.
Thank you! This, in some aspects, has been the most soothing message yet! It was a joy and pain, but of a good kind, to listen to! :)
This video said the perfect thing at the perfect time (April 2020.) Doubt this was a coincidence - it must have been produced in response to the crisis at hand.
An act of heroism.
The School of Life, thank you so much for this wonderful video that helps many of us to find peace and hope within these moments of crisis. I really needed to hear that is everything will be OKAY regardless of the final outcome.
Once again I came out wiser and calmer. Thanks!
WOW, THANK YOU❤
School of Life, I would love if you could put subtitles in other languages, especially Arabic and German. This will broaden up your audience and I can finally send these videos to my parents so that they can understand.
and Polish! pretty please
spanish please. Muchas gracias
English is the most spoken language in the world, they can' t make subtitles for every other language, go to your settings and change it to your language.
Thank you for my weekly therapy seassion... Really thank you... It's hard to find a good therapist...
It is so soothing to see and hear videos from the school of life during this crisis. Thank you eternally❤️❤️
Thank you. Really needed this today.
I love this! Tweeted it out, I struggle a great deal with communicating with others, thank you for helping me grow and growing, applying knowledge doesnt end, we might not or I dont graduate from 4closure, jobs, health issues, its just part of life and its bearable and at times tough but I keep trying, growing and applying knowledge.
Good on you!
These videos are so therapeutic for me. I am deeply influenced by the ideas presented. Thanks!
i had no idea how enormous of an effect our childhood has on our quality of life in adulthood. woww. thank you for the enlightening
Safak Sahin Really? If you have children don’t forget that then 🙏
Safak Sahin our childhoods are our life’s foundation . I’ve been labeled an overprotective mother but I had my reasons , trauma which can happen to anyone . I believe today’s children are subjected to unnecessary trauma that is happening because of greed and corruption .
I had to remain emotionally mature in a crisis, from childhood onwards. It does wear you out. But then, there was a lot of violence we were subjected to, from a father who drank, but excused his violence toward us. I am often the target of people's anger now. I struggle with regulating my emotions. When you grow up in that sort of chaos, you learn not to explode at others...even at the cost of your own sanity...which has happened a lot.. ie psychosis. So many are living in a state of permanent trauma response...this society does not really support human needs for safety very well. Thanks for reading. I hope it helps someone.
❤
It seems like a lot of people stop watching before 2:15. That's where he said there will be a time when a disaster does strike and you're prompted to go "ah ha! See? I told you so." This leads to losing faith in 'therapy' or preached wisdom.
The point of this video is that many people add insult onto their own injury. They make matters bigger or worse for themselves on top of how bad things already are for them. They miss out on what they have left. They overlook how they could survive, workaround, or even thrive despite catastrophic disasters. You are much more resilient than you think when the worse has come to be.
When the truth is, therapy doesn't (shouldn't) tell you you're wrong, but that despite these possible/undeniable disasters you still have some control and that you don't need to add insult to yourself on top of current injuries. A therapist should be teach this in a way that makes it easier for you to put into practice.
This was wonderful. I should listen to this once a week.