I'm an almost 65-year-old-woman who has only figured out in the past WEEK that I am mostly likely autistic. I'm a lifelong artist who ended up specializing in original paper dolls. I ran a mail-order business selling prints of my work for over 30 years, (in the 90s, way before the Internet) and had a website starting in 1996. I have only recently retired the website and most selling. Everything you said, Sam, resonated so MUCH! I wish I had had the technological tools to help me with the boring 'business' parts of my business. I believed I was just the weird artist who wanted to create and not be bothered with all that other stuff.
I was a paper doll lover well into my teen years and still have some collected, so I googled your work and I just want to say WOW, you are such a talented illustrator!
As an unemployed, almost 30 yr old AuDHDer with no idea what I want to do, a huge mismatch of qualifications and experience, and always struggled being employed, the beginning of this video was so validating to me. Thank you for sharing 🙏☺️🧡
I am self employed because being employed is so stressful as an autistic adhd adult.Being employed led to meltdowns and saying things out of turn and being fired for silly stuff. But working for yourself is hard too. I can do the “have to do” tasks, keep appointments, no problem, but the book work and tax stuff is really hard to keep on top of. Also the seeking new customers and follow up of existing customers, also a challenge. I tried business coaching but that put so much pressure on me I ended up so stressed and then burnt out, and the coach just thought I was lazy. Thanks for your insights.
@@YoSamdySam Absolutely! I'm thankful for your video, because I've listened to a lot of self-employed/entrepreneurial advice before, and it overwhelmed me. This makes it seem more approachable. Much appreciated!
I run my own one-person company and the thing I stuggle most with is myself. Frequent severe drops in energy levels, task planning, sticking to any plans, losing motivation, making decisions, prioritising, communication problems with business partners, all of it and then the axiety from seeing the problems and not really being able to solve them. And being left in the dust by competitors who are not having to deal with these issues... I'm also in a country where I haven't got the first clue whether there is any support...
I feel all of these things so hard. You are not alone in experiencing this. I am an independent contractor, and finding myself unable to keep up with the communications and paperwork required to work, even the low part-time hours I do. I work more than 40 hours right now for only 3 days of income. I am desperately seeking ways to make this work better.
Good to hear that life doesn't end at 30, as I'm 34 by now and was never able to provide for myself for one reason or another. The longer it goes the more I fear this will never change. But who knows what time will bring. At least I finally got my officiall ASD diagnosis a couple weeks ago.
I hear you, have felt the same, I'm 33 rn. Watching this gave me some hope. I need to figure out something to work on again. I've scrapped the other things I've tried before.. I've considered going back to school but IDK about more huge debt. No diagnosis but I became born again Christian so I'll pray to God about it and continue to be thankful for each day. Take care!
🤯 "Other people's expectations will get in the way and they will not hear what I'm saying, they'll hear what they EXPECT me to say." THIS is why I always have problems with people!!! Being (or NOT being) actually listened to is huge for me and you've narrowed it down for me so I now know why it goes wrong!
Only had dual diagnosis recently. Your videos are very encouraging. I worked in Film, TV and digital media. I was at uni retraining for a new aspect of creative media when health and family issues blocked me. Now I find out I'm like Sam. I used to script, shoot and edit my own work. I was a self employed creative. I'm thinking about starting a youtube channel on another subject. I've rewritten this post about 6 times because I'm so tired but I had to say something now. It's great to know there are others like me. Keep up the good work.
Don't stress. For me it was just talking. I had gone through an ADHD assessment already with the same therapist, so for me it was fairly short and expanding in what had already been discussed. I had documented my thinking behind each answer on the AQ50 questionnaire I had been given to fill in (as to me some of the questions can be answered multiple ways depending on how I read the question)
Go through the autism diagnostic criteria (search online for: autism diagnostic criteria dsm 5) and write down which ones you identify with. Have examples if you can. That’s what they will go through with you. Plus they will ask about your childhood and whether the symptoms were there in childhood. This is why they often ask you to bring a parent or a caregiver who knew you then. The key is to be honest with them. They have heard everything before so you have to be honest, or it won’t be an accurate result. Just be honest and truthful. You also need to be prepared to get emotional about it during the assessment. You might be overwhelmed with going through your past memories if they were traumatic. So get ready for that. You’ll be fine though.
They can vary a bit but you'll likely do a few questionnaires (you might take them away to do at home) and then talk a lot! Mine was 3x sessions of 2 hours and they were very intense but others had assessments that weren't that long. Good luck!
I am not self employed, but I am employed in an office environment. Clear communications cannot be over emphasized. It frustrates me to the point of anger the way some people avoid clearly stating what they are asking me to do. Being vague causes unnecessary work on my part - I can literally spend a day working on a request that the requester thought would take five minutes because they did not clearly state what they wanted. I have learned to send those requests back with questions. But formulating the questions also takes time. I also have an issue with email subject lines. It really needs to have something to do with the body of the email. Often, I will get regurgitated emails forwarded to me with subject lines like "RE: PO Number 12345." I suggest taking the PO email and adding it as an attachment to a new email containing the question - for instance "Product XXXX lead time request." Sorry for the rant... office communication is a source of persistent annoyance, frustration, and distress for me.
I am learning that I am capable of being more disciplined about my writing (I am finally writing again!), but I cannot sustain my writing sessions for very long. I seem to be good for about an hour. I wish I could have those long writing sessions some other writers are able to do, but I can’t. I’m learning to accept this. I have to do things in ways that work for me.
I had a job I really loved but once I had my son and realized he was autistic and has high support needs I became a stay at home mom. I'm thinking of becoming self employed in the future. Thank you for sharing your experiences! 💞
This is super useful if you're in a small company/enterprise especially if you've got quite a lot of autonomy too. I think one of the harsh realities with all this is you have to take responsibility for your ND presentation/traits and really get to know them and yourself a lot better. ADHD traits often mean we put things off until the last minute, but that trait can and does fail, so you absolutely need to work out ways to not put things off or have solutions in place for when that failure occurs.
It really bugs me when people in our community don't take responsibility for the way we feel, think and act and simply blame being ND all or most of the time.
Absolutely @@Catlily5 and we also need to remember than there are a lot of industries which are brimming full of other ND people - medicine, the performing arts, engineering, writing gosh all sorts...
@@RobinPalmerTV life history trauma and cptsd as well as hypersensitivity and lack of support and healthy relatuonships, are to take into account, neurdiversity doesn't explain everything and trauma history in people s lives explain a lot between those who are drawn back and those who succeed more easily or quicker in their life career
An autism coach would have been amazing tbh I’m in the US, I get nothing. There are some programs out there but you have to have super high support needs, be non verbal, or have a below average IQ (I was told it’s below 80 for a program I thought looked interesting that would get you an aid for college and stuff) It’s funny but because of those requirements, there are a lot of autistic people who might do incredibly well with just a tiny bit of guidance relying on disability because they have no way to get other help.
Occupational therapists do that work as well & would be considered for health insurance. But yeah, unfortunately not enough occupational therapists for adults... OMG maybe that could be my next career?
I'm in New Zealand and there is support here for autistic people who have professional diagnosis - we can go through a process called Needs Assessment and Service Coordination (sometimes Connections and Funding) and get funded supports that way. I have support workers for two hours a week and they have helped a lot! There may be other options too depending on the region people live in. ADHD unfortunately doesn't qualify for that but some other neurodivergent conditions might. There is a free information service too and online support groups facilitated by peer support workers and self-diagnosed people can access those. I am not self-employed, but I do work and study mostly from home and a lot of these tips are things I do and they help a lot. It's because of having my support workers I've been able to go back to engaging with occupation, before I was so isolated and stuck and quite unwell. Autistic community are so great if I have some kind of struggle or just need some support or encouragement - they are always there to prop me up 🥰 Inertia is a BIG challenge and I completely agree with prioritising rest and self-care very deliberately, it's easy to let that slip while in the focus tunnel!! 😅
I'm a junior at university right now and i'm alreadying thinking about self employiment for my area. I have applied to over 200 internships interviews and less than 20 have returned, it's a total nightmare because i am not even graduated and i can already feel the smashing difference. so i have decided to dedicate my small freetime to get ready to seetle my own company and to learn more about all this. Your video came at the perfect time ❤
PLEASE MORE OF THIS. I’m autistic and ADHD, also 34 years old and I’ve wanted to start a business for (realistically my whole life) but since I turned 18 years old. I’ve have SO MANY ideas but I get so overwhelmed.m with all the different steps and aspects.
@@Catlily5 I’m able to break down the steps alright, but it’s the initiation of the steps that I struggle with. Like getting started. And finding time in my day on a consistent basis.
I'm so so jealous of auDHDers who are self-employed! I think that's my dream job honestly. I'm just not brave enough to make the leap yet! (and procrastinating). Looking forward to employing some of these tips when trying to upload videos in my spare time 🙂 On a completely different note, I saw you speak at Autism from the Inside's event in London and I was thoroughly impressed by your presentation! (I believe you said it was your first public speaking event?? I might be wrong, got an unreliable memory 😅) Regardless, you did amazingly! I wish you all the best Sam, you're doing the neurodivergent community proud!!
I’m struggling to set up my own business (at the age of 60), but I’ve just discovered a couple of groups organised by fellow autistics who have their own businesses and these are helping (and re-motivating)) me! Of course, this video and emails will be very helpful! I may watch this several times and take a few notes!!!
"It's never too late!" -- Hear, hear! As an early-middle-aged brand new youtuber, to this I can attest. It is never too late to get started on living your life . . . even from beyond the grave (to which I can also attest . . .).
This video is awesome - thank you! I finished my PhD in 2008 (lol) and have been underemployed ever since. The job market collapsed that year, and I never recovered. I'm close to burning out now and planning to quit my job in June. I teach at a university in Mongolia, but my teen and I are starting a "gap year" in the USA in July to see if we can try ADHD meds (banned in Mongolia). I also really want to change my career, because as an autistic person with ADHD, I am really not suited for teaching. I just don't want to do it anymore. I am 57, so I can guarantee that life doesn't end in your 30s! But I wish I had more of an idea of what to do next, so I'm excited for any info you send out.
Whew. It took a while just to start this video because it hits such a chord with me. Underemployed, with a cv that’s all over the place, and 3 years of trying to start a business when it was never something I wanted to do and repeatedly sabotaging myself. It’s so frustrating sitting with what sure looks like the fact that I am unable to support myself.
I had a really good experience with a mental health coach while doing my postgraduate degree (in the UK paid for by disabled student allowance), it is definitely helpful to get support even if it is just a person to bounce ideas off. Personally, I have worked part-time for many years at a Church where I am well supported to do what I do as the caretaker but do not have to deal with things I cannot manage. I have been fortunate in that, as the one experience I had with the Jobcentre in the UK led to a prolonged burnout (before I knew I was autistic) and I have issues with energy levels meaning full-time work is not possible.
I’m in England and have adhd and what would have been Aspergers and recently been awarded access to work. I get 30 hours help for my business. The hardest part is letting go of control and delegating lol. Also for me and what I do, the mono-tropism or as you mentioned inertia is beneficial due to complexity of task and then memory issues. I find if I don’t go with those long hours I take longer over all - so I’m working on full days of long hours for a certain project duration and then taking extra days not working off after and in between projects
I live in Czechia and as far as I am aware there is almost none support for autistic people, let alone for self-employed ones. There is one nonprofit that offers free groups and I think that's it. Two years ago I got my Asperger's diagnosis and was gently pushed out of the children clinical psychologist's office (because only children psychologists and psychiatrist can diagnose autism here. But ofc they will not treat you). I am basically on my own since then. Not that it's been different before.
Same in Italy: I decided to get diagnosed hoping in some sort of support or accommodation. Not even the University gave a 💩 (La Sapienza, the largest Uni in Europe.. ). They only recognize dyslexia/dysgraphia/dyscalculia. To have any kind of accommodations, I would need to get a certificate of severe disability.. 😶
same in Poland, that's why I moved to live abroad in UK, you wouldn't believe but people can be actually tolerant, and polite towards you even if not really willing to help you, and they would often think of you as "it's because of being foreign" instead of "what a weirdo". So after 15 years in UK I am pretty certian I am not going back, despite constant struggles to find and keep a job.
@@mariuszwisla3230 Good for you for living in UK! I lived for 6 months there as an au pair. And I'd like to move abroad as well in the future. On the finding the job front, unfortunately it will probably not be different in other places I think. It is certainly an issue in here. Are you thinking about returning? I would think that UK now after 15 years feels more like home than Poland?
Thank you, Sam! 💖 This is such excellent advice, and I really needed it right now. Your inspiring insights are perfectly balanced with the necessary realities that AuDHDers must allow for when self-employed. I especially appreciate you discussing the concepts of burnout and self-worth. I also love your email newsletters.
In Germany there are ASP/Eingliederungshilfe to assist with everyday tasks. You can actually contact a Träger without a diagnosis, and they might help you get one if you so wish. If you're still in school you can get a Schulbegleitung or Studienassistenz. I'm unsure where/how exactly to apply for those. The Eingliederungshilfe would also help finding back into work life after a time of sickness or unemployment. That's the ones I'm aware of.
Dankeschön! Ich bin gerade dabei, eine Diagnose für mich erstellen zu lassen. 54 und nie auf die Idee gekommen, ich könnte auf dem Spektrum sein. Nun ist alles verwirrend und daher danke für deinen Post ❤
(Also don’t think you were rude in the email. I often find being direct is the kindest thing as it doesn’t promote the suffering that comes with misguided expectation. Of course it’s different for us all what’s considered rude, but I think for the most part people will understand and not think it as rude)
Sorry, little random, but this video is so pleasantly sparkly and the lighting is gorgeous! I love how the two different gels catch different sides of your blonde hair 🤩😍
Your candor and honesty are so refreshing! I love the focus on working WITH what you need. There's so much in structured workplaces about trying to shove your neurodivergent self into an existing system that doesn't work. Undiagnosed autism and diagnosed ADHD here. I work as a therapist full-time and this is the first time I'm not working a structured work week. This video helped me understand what I've been struggling with as I continue to heal from burnout working two jobs and before that doing my master's degree.
I wonder how often when working that you went in the kitchen just to get a cuppa and then end up cleaning/clearing out the fridge etc. 😁 I once realised that I’d spent 30 minutes (!!!) re-arranging fridge magnets so that they all looked like they fitted together like a jigsaw. I then remembered that I’d left my boss on hold on the phone 😱 I told her it was ‘a toilet emergency’ 😅
I love your content and channel and I am glad you asked the question about the email footer and whether it is rude. As someone who appreciates your content and the question, yes, I will say that the bit at 11:00 is kinda snappy. It is presuming the other person has expectations to adjust. A more gentle approach may be: To set expectations of response time, I only work part-time hours or something of that nature where it isn't like placing anger on people who may not deserve it
@YoSamdySam it's all good. Happens to the best of us. At least you had enough self-awareness to ask the question, and that's something I really respect about you. 🥰 I honestly have had the same frustrations living in a world not built for my brain, so I hear you. It 100% gets very frustrating when people repeatedly do set expectations that aren't realistic/healthy for you to meet, and I imagine this may have been one of those that has happened a lot. You're awesome!
@Yo Samdy Sam Maybe you were feeling snappy, but maybe not. Sometimes it’s really hard for me to tell if emotions are affecting the way I put something, or if I’m just being a bit blunt and not seeing the possible nuances. I spend a lot of time reviewing email text for how it might be perceived, which I guess is the argument for using AI. It’s what I hate about in person communications because I will absolutely review what I said later and beat myself up about it. Sometimes I was swayed by emotions, but other times it is just how I speak.
@jimwilliams3816 fair point. I do that too where I am blunt. Eg. My comment...trying to speak my perception because a question was asked but also trying to do so in a loving way because I do really appreciate @YoSamdySam and her humility and self-awareness and the wonderful contributions to AuDHD content on the internet!
@@natalieedelstein I didn't mean to suggest anything re: your comment, I found it quite reasonable. I had a similar thought to you on the wording, maybe it sounded a bit abrupt. It was more a comment to Sam on her response, to be sure and give herself some benefit of a doubt as to whether mood was a factor in the wording. Sounding snappy and feeling snappy are not always synonymous for people on the spectrum. :)
Hi Sam, thank you so much for this, not self employed but find work very difficult in terms of other people and self, everything in this piece was so relatable and so necessary ❤❤❤ thanks again 😊
Thank you so much Sam! I'm not self-employed, but many things have resonated with me. I also graduated (with one of my MSc-s) in 2008 and ended up working in coffee shops for a year. My CV is also a mismatch of roles and areas. I used to change jobs often as in 6 mo. or so I'd realise it wasn't for me / got bored. Until I got stuck in a job for over 10 years due to becoming a mum, a long term burn out, inertia and inability to pull my shit together to find a better job... Bla-di-bla... And now, at nearly 44 yo, I still don't know what I'd want to be when I "grow up" 😂 I am employed though (and even out of that 10+ year long job). And currently burnt out.
This was very helpful, thank you. More please :) I'm also self-employed and have struggled with all those things. It was even worse before knowing anything about neurodivergence; blaming and criticizing myself did not help really help much.
Planning naps sound good to me 🤣Chat GPT is great for getting me out of those 'planning a response spirals' that happen so often when I've got the less straightforward ones to attend to. I'm in the UK civil service and it's very common to have a footer saying my non work days are such and such, or my hours are flexible so I don't expect a response when I communicate out of office hours , or my inbox is not monitored when I am not working so I don't think stating that you work part time is rude - maybe specifiy what sort of hours you spend responding to emails if you want to manage expectations perhaps?
Part time worker is having boundaries. This is a useful mental health skill that most people need to learn because as children adults don't generally respect them with children, so not expected to have them as part of availability. It is okay to have boundaries.
ADHD means difficulty starting and difficulty stopping. Think about how all pervasive a difficulty that is and how it can account for so many problems we encounter.
I want to move to being self employed eventually after a decade of struggling through my job after a diagnosis. Thank you for this inspiring video - you’re so appreciated!❤
I recently started to feel burnt out at work ( I'm a Catering Assistant) on top of doing a Professional Cookery Course, which I'm enjoying but at the moment I've had to take Sunday's off just to clear my head a bit & figure out a system where I feel less tired at work. I'm not ADHD, just ASD. Also I do quite fancy the idea of being Self Employed but thanks for the heads up if it doesn't work out.
I am a late diagnosed AuDhD. I live in the USA in a right-wing state, and I'm a legal- immigrant, and so far the supports have been better than support I received in Canada where I was born and raised. *Responding to your "Leave a comment" section in this video at 16:49. I think there is more support here in the US for the neurodiversity community than there is in Canada just because of the sheer numbers of people researching it ( and making changes in policy and supporting the people they know and love that are on the spectrum). Before other Canadians call me a traitor; it's hard to get a diagnosis in Canada, traits are not recognizable by physicians or teachers, especially for girls and women, or people of certain ethnicities, and if you do get a diagnosis there is more stigma in the system than there might be in the community. Here in the place I live, I did receive a call about having a social worker available to help me, but I do not trust the American system so far as to let someone IN MY HOME. Love all your videos. Loved the idea to use an AI tool for tasks I drudge and will never get around to. Would like more information about that specifically.
Really interesting and informative video. I'm still awaiting diagnosis for autism (just under 4 years waiting for nhs appointment!). Currently employed but struggling, so self employment may be a pathway to consider. Thanks again for creating this video.
I am in the U.S. and I just found out that your local chapter of the autism society helps with coaching. I have to look into it more, but that might be a good place to start.
Great video Sam. I'm not self employed, but have recently been considering it an option for the future. It sounds very tough and demanding in many ways (although working for the man obviously has its own challenges as well), but seeing neurodivergent women such as yourself find success in a self-employed role gives me some confidence. Thank you for the tips!
My problem is continually having to reinvent on how to find hacks that work because after all while things that did work really well just stop working. It's frustrating and exhausting but equally I know that I can do it because I've done it thousands of times before. Thank you for your video and so glad you are back ❤
I think there is some great stuff in this video whether you're self-employed or not. Personally, while I do think about self-employment as a change from my current employment. It's hard to see what I could actually do (what do I make, sell, consult on, train people to do), that's going to be of sufficient value. You mentioned that in the video and about having a collection of experience and qualifications where others don't see the common links. While in my case I can see everything links to some aspect of STEM I'm still struggling to see how I might convert that into something.
Autism coaches that come to your house? Must be the only country to offer that, I think in 99% of countries that's not a thing (and I'm in the EU as well, we generally have good health care). Support of any kind is very rare in most countries as far as I'm aware. The only autism-specific support I get is a (private!) self-help group that meets maybe 4-5 times a year... Finding a therapist that has any non-outdated (or any at all) knowledge about autism is futile. So I guess most of us can't basically hope for a lot of outside help. That's why UA-cam channels like yours are so important; I get most of the relevant tipps for living with autism from here!
Yeah I am wondering about this. I am officially diagnosed and living in the Netherlands. Because they classified me as high functioning, the only coaching I got is private (and I still do because I need it). It's a right here to ask for help, but actually getting it approved and the funding? Not for all. I know because I am a social worker too 😅
I currently do Door Dash for work here in the US. It works for the most part. The hardest part is the innertia and getting myself out of the house. Also frustration intolerance if a particular order or shift is not going well its difficult to not end my shift early and just go home.
Yo Sam, it's good to see again! INSOMNIA ... There is very little support or assistance in my present area. However, I am getting together with a group in a different city, not too far away, and am thinking of seeing if there would be any way that an autism group can assist me locally with obtaining a space for an hour a week, and facilitating my own group here. I'm trying to understand why vagueness and ambiguity is such a stumbling block. Is it this idea of "mind blindness" and "delayed processing" in conjunction with ambiguity that exacerbates the autistic weakness of information processing? In a professional setting, at least in my experience, as an electronic engineer, as my work is mostly solo oriented, where I am highly skilled and respected, these issues don't negatively affect me. It's primarily in the social aspects of my life, where it wreaks havoc.
Super useful advice Sam! I’m not self employed but I’m a PhD student with lots of different research appointments that are all self motivated so it sometimes feels like I’m self employed 😂 but great tips for people who are not self employed but who work in places with very low supervision and require LOTS of self motivation
We are close in age and you are such an inspiration to me! I’ve benefitted from other AuDHD UA-camrs but they are all in their younger 20’s so it’s often difficult to relate and some suggestions just don’t work at this stage of life. I cannot tell you how thankful I am to have discovered your channel. You are a beacon of hope and I truly appreciate your work and your mission 🙏🏼 🩷. I would love to hear how you manage burnout as a parent! I am a first time mother to a 15 month old. I would do anything for him but my trauma and neurodivergence make me feel like I’m failing as a parent even if logically I may not be. I want another child but am terrified I won’t be able to survive. Knowing you have multiples, your insight would be most invaluable 🙏🏼.
for Aussie Autistic lovelies there are some Occupational therapy companies out there that can help you learn to drive. And some of them are covered by NDIS. Know that I"m 39 and have yet to get my license even after 2 tries. But one day I will when I can get past how intimidating it is, and can afford a car. (p.s. AuDHD and ptsd here)
I am from The Netherlands but live in Austria, and I really haven't found anything useful to help me with stuff in my life I deal with because of being autistic... Definitely not in the way that these things were available back when I lived in NL. Here, so much of the discourse around autism is still about stereotypical 8 year old boys. Any support organisations I've found are either focused on children or their parents, and there is still very much this idea of "high functioning" and "low functioning" autism. It's so frustrating... And I'm currently a PhD student, but when I finish my studies I feel like to be able to work a job in an organisation or to navigate being self employed (because honestly I can't imagine being able to work a normal job) I would need some help from the type of coach you can get in The Netherlands. So I hope that somehow in the next few years this will become more common here in Austria as well.
Make a list of things you enjoy doing and are good at (e.g., photography, cooking, writing, tutoring students, etc. ) and how you might get started part-time. In the US, the SBA - small business association - has retired business owners who will mentor you for free, offer tax help, etc. You can also shadow someone for a day, maybe videotaping the workflow. UA-cam also has hundreds of videos on self-employment, freelancing, and work-from-home jobs.
In the USA there is a job program for people who are disabled to help them get jobs. It is called DVR. I don't know how much they would help with self employment but it might be worth a try.
Hey good to see you back! I've had aspergers since birth and if it's not uncomfortable I'd like to ask you question which I don't know if you've answered already before. What kind, if any, od supplements, nootropics or drugs do you take? I'm trying to help myself as much as possible also in thia way, so it's a huge help! Thanks
Unfortunately, I live in the US. I am newly self diagnosed at 59. My journey since May has been rough. Maybe someone in the states can help me out if they have found support. 😢
I live in the US & there isn't really anything at all 😑 i applied for disability benefits the year i was diagnosed, provided my decade of diverse work history, & they denied my app from the jump because i didn't "have enough work credit." Soooooo..... am i to understand that there are benefits available for people with conditions that render them unable to support themselves fully in a way they can live with, but only if i first spend 20 years trying in order to prove it enough??
At first I doubted your divergence…then you went off script and I was like “there she is!!!” You sped up and your hands went all over. I enjoyed seeing you. Is what you said for the footer rude…I can see it getting lost in text. But hearing you say it didn’t sound rude.
Using generative aI for chat bots to better communicate with NTs sounds like a great idea. After all, the machine learning model is trained mostly on data generated by NTs, I'm assuming. BTW, remind me to have a word with your video editor, I have some minor pointers. :D
Hey, I'm wondering if there's a (group of) british mum(s) in the Netherlands (autistic or not) I could get in contact with 😊 If you know please reply, thank you in advance ❤
It's probably an advantage when you are self-employed and the system doesn't work, you can just the system, you are the boss making decisions. while when you're employed somewhere and your boss is not really concerned with your wellbeing, and completely clueless about autistic, and to drive his/hers bonus implements for example a change to your working hours, and tells you that you start early mornings from next week, and you know it won't work for you, than what? than you're living a nightmare.
WHEWWW! I can NOT do entrepreneurship 😅 Idk how y'all do it. I tried & ended up doing absolutely nothing after a while. I also burned out in half the time it takes me in traditional jobs.
This channel has to be one of the biggest whinge fests on UA-cam. Seriously, there are so many channels like this now which just go on and on about fake victimhood and struggle blah blah. I hope most the comments are bots and not actual people typing things like "omg this resonated with me so much, sending positive vibes." If you want to help yourself you need to stop watching mental health attention seeking channels like this and go outside and exercise. See a psychotherapist if you want, it can help as these struggles are just part of life, nothing more. These channels will actually reinforce victimhood in yourself and a dependency on para social relationships which will keep you coming back for more. I am sure this lady is a pretty decent person but these trendy mental health videos like many on UA-cam are exploiting vulnerable groups of people for views and ultimately money. There are many, many people who often have just mild traits of ADHD/Autism which although you should be aware of, it means very little in the scheme of things. There are a small amount of people who have true forms of ADHD/Autism and I can assure you their lives have absolutely nothing in common with these sugar coated videos. These people actually have seriously miserable struggles and these social media trend videos are an insult to people with true forms of ADHD/Autism.
I'm an almost 65-year-old-woman who has only figured out in the past WEEK that I am mostly likely autistic. I'm a lifelong artist who ended up specializing in original paper dolls. I ran a mail-order business selling prints of my work for over 30 years, (in the 90s, way before the Internet) and had a website starting in 1996. I have only recently retired the website and most selling. Everything you said, Sam, resonated so MUCH! I wish I had had the technological tools to help me with the boring 'business' parts of my business. I believed I was just the weird artist who wanted to create and not be bothered with all that other stuff.
I was a paper doll lover well into my teen years and still have some collected, so I googled your work and I just want to say WOW, you are such a talented illustrator!
As an unemployed, almost 30 yr old AuDHDer with no idea what I want to do, a huge mismatch of qualifications and experience, and always struggled being employed, the beginning of this video was so validating to me. Thank you for sharing 🙏☺️🧡
Exactly me!! I haven't gotten through the whole beginning, but I definitely look forward to it even more now 😊
The is me too
I can relate to this as well! Officially diagnosed with autism, self diagnosed with ADHD inattentive type.
I am self employed because being employed is so stressful as an autistic adhd adult.Being employed led to meltdowns and saying things out of turn and being fired for silly stuff. But working for yourself is hard too. I can do the “have to do” tasks, keep appointments, no problem, but the book work and tax stuff is really hard to keep on top of. Also the seeking new customers and follow up of existing customers, also a challenge. I tried business coaching but that put so much pressure on me I ended up so stressed and then burnt out, and the coach just thought I was lazy. Thanks for your insights.
Business coaching by neurotypicals sounds so stressful! We absolutely need someone who gets it!
@@YoSamdySam Absolutely! I'm thankful for your video, because I've listened to a lot of self-employed/entrepreneurial advice before, and it overwhelmed me. This makes it seem more approachable. Much appreciated!
I'm a self employed bookkeeper and tax preparer who is auDHD, and even I find it hard to keep on top of it when there aren't any looming deadlines!
I run my own one-person company and the thing I stuggle most with is myself. Frequent severe drops in energy levels, task planning, sticking to any plans, losing motivation, making decisions, prioritising, communication problems with business partners, all of it and then the axiety from seeing the problems and not really being able to solve them. And being left in the dust by competitors who are not having to deal with these issues... I'm also in a country where I haven't got the first clue whether there is any support...
I feel all of these things so hard. You are not alone in experiencing this. I am an independent contractor, and finding myself unable to keep up with the communications and paperwork required to work, even the low part-time hours I do. I work more than 40 hours right now for only 3 days of income. I am desperately seeking ways to make this work better.
Good to hear that life doesn't end at 30, as I'm 34 by now and was never able to provide for myself for one reason or another. The longer it goes the more I fear this will never change. But who knows what time will bring. At least I finally got my officiall ASD diagnosis a couple weeks ago.
I hear you, have felt the same, I'm 33 rn. Watching this gave me some hope. I need to figure out something to work on again. I've scrapped the other things I've tried before.. I've considered going back to school but IDK about more huge debt. No diagnosis but I became born again Christian so I'll pray to God about it and continue to be thankful for each day. Take care!
🤯 "Other people's expectations will get in the way and they will not hear what I'm saying, they'll hear what they EXPECT me to say." THIS is why I always have problems with people!!! Being (or NOT being) actually listened to is huge for me and you've narrowed it down for me so I now know why it goes wrong!
Only had dual diagnosis recently. Your videos are very encouraging. I worked in Film, TV and digital media. I was at uni retraining for a new aspect of creative media when health and family issues blocked me. Now I find out I'm like Sam. I used to script, shoot and edit my own work. I was a self employed creative. I'm thinking about starting a youtube channel on another subject. I've rewritten this post about 6 times because I'm so tired but I had to say something now. It's great to know there are others like me. Keep up the good work.
my autism assessment starts next week Wednesday. After about a year of waiting. I have no idea what to expect honestly.
Don't stress. For me it was just talking. I had gone through an ADHD assessment already with the same therapist, so for me it was fairly short and expanding in what had already been discussed.
I had documented my thinking behind each answer on the AQ50 questionnaire I had been given to fill in (as to me some of the questions can be answered multiple ways depending on how I read the question)
Go through the autism diagnostic criteria (search online for: autism diagnostic criteria dsm 5) and write down which ones you identify with. Have examples if you can.
That’s what they will go through with you. Plus they will ask about your childhood and whether the symptoms were there in childhood. This is why they often ask you to bring a parent or a caregiver who knew you then.
The key is to be honest with them. They have heard everything before so you have to be honest, or it won’t be an accurate result. Just be honest and truthful.
You also need to be prepared to get emotional about it during the assessment. You might be overwhelmed with going through your past memories if they were traumatic. So get ready for that. You’ll be fine though.
They can vary a bit but you'll likely do a few questionnaires (you might take them away to do at home) and then talk a lot! Mine was 3x sessions of 2 hours and they were very intense but others had assessments that weren't that long. Good luck!
It can be very draining, so plan plenty of rest and be kind to yourself. It is also perfectly alright to ask them what you can expect. Good luck! ❤
I am not self employed, but I am employed in an office environment. Clear communications cannot be over emphasized. It frustrates me to the point of anger the way some people avoid clearly stating what they are asking me to do. Being vague causes unnecessary work on my part - I can literally spend a day working on a request that the requester thought would take five minutes because they did not clearly state what they wanted. I have learned to send those requests back with questions. But formulating the questions also takes time. I also have an issue with email subject lines. It really needs to have something to do with the body of the email. Often, I will get regurgitated emails forwarded to me with subject lines like "RE: PO Number 12345." I suggest taking the PO email and adding it as an attachment to a new email containing the question - for instance "Product XXXX lead time request." Sorry for the rant... office communication is a source of persistent annoyance, frustration, and distress for me.
I'm with you on all that. I hate when someone sends me a request in an email reply that doesn't even have to do with the original email.
I am learning that I am capable of being more disciplined about my writing (I am finally writing again!), but I cannot sustain my writing sessions for very long. I seem to be good for about an hour. I wish I could have those long writing sessions some other writers are able to do, but I can’t. I’m learning to accept this. I have to do things in ways that work for me.
I had a job I really loved but once I had my son and realized he was autistic and has high support needs I became a stay at home mom. I'm thinking of becoming self employed in the future. Thank you for sharing your experiences! 💞
This is super useful if you're in a small company/enterprise especially if you've got quite a lot of autonomy too.
I think one of the harsh realities with all this is you have to take responsibility for your ND presentation/traits and really get to know them and yourself a lot better.
ADHD traits often mean we put things off until the last minute, but that trait can and does fail, so you absolutely need to work out ways to not put things off or have solutions in place for when that failure occurs.
Absolutely, you nailed it!
It really bugs me when people in our community don't take responsibility for the way we feel, think and act and simply blame being ND all or most of the time.
Learning to work with or around our problems instead of fighting against them is important.
Absolutely @@Catlily5 and we also need to remember than there are a lot of industries which are brimming full of other ND people - medicine, the performing arts, engineering, writing gosh all sorts...
@@RobinPalmerTV life history trauma and cptsd as well as hypersensitivity and lack of support and healthy relatuonships, are to take into account, neurdiversity doesn't explain everything and trauma history in people s lives explain a lot between those who are drawn back and those who succeed more easily or quicker in their life career
An autism coach would have been amazing tbh
I’m in the US, I get nothing. There are some programs out there but you have to have super high support needs, be non verbal, or have a below average IQ (I was told it’s below 80 for a program I thought looked interesting that would get you an aid for college and stuff)
It’s funny but because of those requirements, there are a lot of autistic people who might do incredibly well with just a tiny bit of guidance relying on disability because they have no way to get other help.
Occupational therapists do that work as well & would be considered for health insurance. But yeah, unfortunately not enough occupational therapists for adults... OMG maybe that could be my next career?
how did it go?!
Love the sparkly mermaid back drop by the way, this makes me instantly feel happy 🧜♀️✨
I'm in New Zealand and there is support here for autistic people who have professional diagnosis - we can go through a process called Needs Assessment and Service Coordination (sometimes Connections and Funding) and get funded supports that way. I have support workers for two hours a week and they have helped a lot! There may be other options too depending on the region people live in. ADHD unfortunately doesn't qualify for that but some other neurodivergent conditions might. There is a free information service too and online support groups facilitated by peer support workers and self-diagnosed people can access those.
I am not self-employed, but I do work and study mostly from home and a lot of these tips are things I do and they help a lot. It's because of having my support workers I've been able to go back to engaging with occupation, before I was so isolated and stuck and quite unwell. Autistic community are so great if I have some kind of struggle or just need some support or encouragement - they are always there to prop me up 🥰 Inertia is a BIG challenge and I completely agree with prioritising rest and self-care very deliberately, it's easy to let that slip while in the focus tunnel!! 😅
I'm a junior at university right now and i'm alreadying thinking about self employiment for my area. I have applied to over 200 internships interviews and less than 20 have returned, it's a total nightmare because i am not even graduated and i can already feel the smashing difference. so i have decided to dedicate my small freetime to get ready to seetle my own company and to learn more about all this. Your video came at the perfect time ❤
PLEASE MORE OF THIS. I’m autistic and ADHD, also 34 years old and I’ve wanted to start a business for (realistically my whole life) but since I turned 18 years old. I’ve have SO MANY ideas but I get so overwhelmed.m with all the different steps and aspects.
I have difficulty breaking down all the steps needed to reach a goal.
@@Catlily5 I’m able to break down the steps alright, but it’s the initiation of the steps that I struggle with. Like getting started. And finding time in my day on a consistent basis.
@@nataliefoxmartin9764 I have trouble with initiating the steps as well.
I'm so so jealous of auDHDers who are self-employed! I think that's my dream job honestly. I'm just not brave enough to make the leap yet! (and procrastinating). Looking forward to employing some of these tips when trying to upload videos in my spare time 🙂
On a completely different note, I saw you speak at Autism from the Inside's event in London and I was thoroughly impressed by your presentation! (I believe you said it was your first public speaking event?? I might be wrong, got an unreliable memory 😅) Regardless, you did amazingly! I wish you all the best Sam, you're doing the neurodivergent community proud!!
Not my first time public speaking, but the first time speaking about autism! So glad you enjoyed the talk and the event :-)
I’m struggling to set up my own business (at the age of 60), but I’ve just discovered a couple of groups organised by fellow autistics who have their own businesses and these are helping (and re-motivating)) me! Of course, this video and emails will be very helpful! I may watch this several times and take a few notes!!!
Oh!! I’m just over 40! I’m used to so many people being so young on here. Can you point me toward these groups you found?
"It's never too late!" -- Hear, hear! As an early-middle-aged brand new youtuber, to this I can attest. It is never too late to get started on living your life . . . even from beyond the grave (to which I can also attest . . .).
Hi Sam! So glad your self employment includes UA-cam ❤❤
This video is awesome - thank you! I finished my PhD in 2008 (lol) and have been underemployed ever since. The job market collapsed that year, and I never recovered. I'm close to burning out now and planning to quit my job in June. I teach at a university in Mongolia, but my teen and I are starting a "gap year" in the USA in July to see if we can try ADHD meds (banned in Mongolia). I also really want to change my career, because as an autistic person with ADHD, I am really not suited for teaching. I just don't want to do it anymore. I am 57, so I can guarantee that life doesn't end in your 30s! But I wish I had more of an idea of what to do next, so I'm excited for any info you send out.
Whew. It took a while just to start this video because it hits such a chord with me. Underemployed, with a cv that’s all over the place, and 3 years of trying to start a business when it was never something I wanted to do and repeatedly sabotaging myself. It’s so frustrating sitting with what sure looks like the fact that I am unable to support myself.
I had a really good experience with a mental health coach while doing my postgraduate degree (in the UK paid for by disabled student allowance), it is definitely helpful to get support even if it is just a person to bounce ideas off.
Personally, I have worked part-time for many years at a Church where I am well supported to do what I do as the caretaker but do not have to deal with things I cannot manage. I have been fortunate in that, as the one experience I had with the Jobcentre in the UK led to a prolonged burnout (before I knew I was autistic) and I have issues with energy levels meaning full-time work is not possible.
I’m in England and have adhd and what would have been Aspergers and recently been awarded access to work. I get 30 hours help for my business. The hardest part is letting go of control and delegating lol. Also for me and what I do, the mono-tropism or as you mentioned inertia is beneficial due to complexity of task and then memory issues. I find if I don’t go with those long hours I take longer over all - so I’m working on full days of long hours for a certain project duration and then taking extra days not working off after and in between projects
I live in Czechia and as far as I am aware there is almost none support for autistic people, let alone for self-employed ones. There is one nonprofit that offers free groups and I think that's it. Two years ago I got my Asperger's diagnosis and was gently pushed out of the children clinical psychologist's office (because only children psychologists and psychiatrist can diagnose autism here. But ofc they will not treat you). I am basically on my own since then. Not that it's been different before.
Same in Italy: I decided to get diagnosed hoping in some sort of support or accommodation. Not even the University gave a 💩 (La Sapienza, the largest Uni in Europe.. ). They only recognize dyslexia/dysgraphia/dyscalculia. To have any kind of accommodations, I would need to get a certificate of severe disability.. 😶
same in Poland, that's why I moved to live abroad in UK, you wouldn't believe but people can be actually tolerant, and polite towards you even if not really willing to help you, and they would often think of you as "it's because of being foreign" instead of "what a weirdo". So after 15 years in UK I am pretty certian I am not going back, despite constant struggles to find and keep a job.
@@mariuszwisla3230 Good for you for living in UK! I lived for 6 months there as an au pair. And I'd like to move abroad as well in the future. On the finding the job front, unfortunately it will probably not be different in other places I think. It is certainly an issue in here. Are you thinking about returning? I would think that UK now after 15 years feels more like home than Poland?
@@kikitauer I stay in UK. Tiy can feel it in the air, that society is less angry
Thank you, Sam! 💖 This is such excellent advice, and I really needed it right now. Your inspiring insights are perfectly balanced with the necessary realities that AuDHDers must allow for when self-employed. I especially appreciate you discussing the concepts of burnout and self-worth. I also love your email newsletters.
Thank you so much! I've been working on a lot of mental blocks I had around newsletters all through this year, so I'm very glad they are appreciated!
In Germany there are ASP/Eingliederungshilfe to assist with everyday tasks. You can actually contact a Träger without a diagnosis, and they might help you get one if you so wish.
If you're still in school you can get a Schulbegleitung or Studienassistenz. I'm unsure where/how exactly to apply for those.
The Eingliederungshilfe would also help finding back into work life after a time of sickness or unemployment.
That's the ones I'm aware of.
Dankeschön! Ich bin gerade dabei, eine Diagnose für mich erstellen zu lassen. 54 und nie auf die Idee gekommen, ich könnte auf dem Spektrum sein. Nun ist alles verwirrend und daher danke für deinen Post ❤
@@stephanijeopdevelt5600 Freut mich! 😊 Gerne!!
Thank you Sam, your content and input is really appreciated.
(Also don’t think you were rude in the email. I often find being direct is the kindest thing as it doesn’t promote the suffering that comes with misguided expectation. Of course it’s different for us all what’s considered rude, but I think for the most part people will understand and not think it as rude)
this is going to useful to me as an autistic person with adhd
Sorry, little random, but this video is so pleasantly sparkly and the lighting is gorgeous! I love how the two different gels catch different sides of your blonde hair 🤩😍
Your candor and honesty are so refreshing! I love the focus on working WITH what you need. There's so much in structured workplaces about trying to shove your neurodivergent self into an existing system that doesn't work. Undiagnosed autism and diagnosed ADHD here. I work as a therapist full-time and this is the first time I'm not working a structured work week. This video helped me understand what I've been struggling with as I continue to heal from burnout working two jobs and before that doing my master's degree.
I wonder how often when working that you went in the kitchen just to get a cuppa and then end up cleaning/clearing out the fridge etc. 😁
I once realised that I’d spent 30 minutes (!!!) re-arranging fridge magnets so that they all looked like they fitted together like a jigsaw. I then remembered that I’d left my boss on hold on the phone 😱
I told her it was ‘a toilet emergency’ 😅
I think the email signoff is very polite. It is clearly comminicating and setting expectations. Reminding people you are a human is perfectly fine.
I love your content and channel and I am glad you asked the question about the email footer and whether it is rude. As someone who appreciates your content and the question, yes, I will say that the bit at 11:00 is kinda snappy. It is presuming the other person has expectations to adjust. A more gentle approach may be: To set expectations of response time, I only work part-time hours
or something of that nature where it isn't like placing anger on people who may not deserve it
that's a great suggestion to rewrite it in a more gentle way! I must have been feeling snappy when I wrote it 😂
@YoSamdySam it's all good. Happens to the best of us. At least you had enough self-awareness to ask the question, and that's something I really respect about you. 🥰 I honestly have had the same frustrations living in a world not built for my brain, so I hear you. It 100% gets very frustrating when people repeatedly do set expectations that aren't realistic/healthy for you to meet, and I imagine this may have been one of those that has happened a lot. You're awesome!
@Yo Samdy Sam Maybe you were feeling snappy, but maybe not. Sometimes it’s really hard for me to tell if emotions are affecting the way I put something, or if I’m just being a bit blunt and not seeing the possible nuances. I spend a lot of time reviewing email text for how it might be perceived, which I guess is the argument for using AI. It’s what I hate about in person communications because I will absolutely review what I said later and beat myself up about it. Sometimes I was swayed by emotions, but other times it is just how I speak.
@jimwilliams3816 fair point. I do that too where I am blunt. Eg. My comment...trying to speak my perception because a question was asked but also trying to do so in a loving way because I do really appreciate @YoSamdySam and her humility and self-awareness and the wonderful contributions to AuDHD content on the internet!
@@natalieedelstein I didn't mean to suggest anything re: your comment, I found it quite reasonable. I had a similar thought to you on the wording, maybe it sounded a bit abrupt. It was more a comment to Sam on her response, to be sure and give herself some benefit of a doubt as to whether mood was a factor in the wording. Sounding snappy and feeling snappy are not always synonymous for people on the spectrum. :)
Nice advice for not necessarily just self-employed. Like client-facing jobs. Also, I had no idea what an autism coach was until now. Thank you.
Bless you, seriously, thank you for deciding to make this video, I felt seen
Hi Sam, thank you so much for this, not self employed but find work very difficult in terms of other people and self, everything in this piece was so relatable and so necessary ❤❤❤ thanks again 😊
Thank you so much Sam!
I'm not self-employed, but many things have resonated with me.
I also graduated (with one of my MSc-s) in 2008 and ended up working in coffee shops for a year. My CV is also a mismatch of roles and areas. I used to change jobs often as in 6 mo. or so I'd realise it wasn't for me / got bored. Until I got stuck in a job for over 10 years due to becoming a mum, a long term burn out, inertia and inability to pull my shit together to find a better job... Bla-di-bla...
And now, at nearly 44 yo, I still don't know what I'd want to be when I "grow up" 😂
I am employed though (and even out of that 10+ year long job). And currently burnt out.
This was very helpful, thank you. More please :)
I'm also self-employed and have struggled with all those things. It was even worse before knowing anything about neurodivergence; blaming and criticizing myself did not help really help much.
Sam you are an inspiration to me and everyone. I am Autistic as well and I am doing it podcast pn UA-cam. 😊
Planning naps sound good to me 🤣Chat GPT is great for getting me out of those 'planning a response spirals' that happen so often when I've got the less straightforward ones to attend to. I'm in the UK civil service and it's very common to have a footer saying my non work days are such and such, or my hours are flexible so I don't expect a response when I communicate out of office hours , or my inbox is not monitored when I am not working so I don't think stating that you work part time is rude - maybe specifiy what sort of hours you spend responding to emails if you want to manage expectations perhaps?
No help and support in Ireland. It’s so behind! But I’m praying and it will change 🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻
Part time worker is having boundaries. This is a useful mental health skill that most people need to learn because as children adults don't generally respect them with children, so not expected to have them as part of availability. It is okay to have boundaries.
ADHD means difficulty starting and difficulty stopping. Think about how all pervasive a difficulty that is and how it can account for so many problems we encounter.
I want to move to being self employed eventually after a decade of struggling through my job after a diagnosis. Thank you for this inspiring video - you’re so appreciated!❤
This is the first time I’ve heard you mention celiac disease. Would you consider doing a video on food restrictions and aversions?
out of interest in nutrition, I concur, if you're willing.
I recently started to feel burnt out at work ( I'm a Catering Assistant) on top of doing a Professional Cookery Course, which I'm enjoying but at the moment I've had to take Sunday's off just to clear my head a bit & figure out a system where I feel less tired at work. I'm not ADHD, just ASD. Also I do quite fancy the idea of being Self Employed but thanks for the heads up if it doesn't work out.
I am a late diagnosed AuDhD. I live in the USA in a right-wing state, and I'm a legal- immigrant, and so far the supports have been better than support I received in Canada where I was born and raised. *Responding to your "Leave a comment" section in this video at 16:49.
I think there is more support here in the US for the neurodiversity community than there is in Canada just because of the sheer numbers of people researching it ( and making changes in policy and supporting the people they know and love that are on the spectrum). Before other Canadians call me a traitor; it's hard to get a diagnosis in Canada, traits are not recognizable by physicians or teachers, especially for girls and women, or people of certain ethnicities, and if you do get a diagnosis there is more stigma in the system than there might be in the community.
Here in the place I live, I did receive a call about having a social worker available to help me, but I do not trust the American system so far as to let someone IN MY HOME.
Love all your videos. Loved the idea to use an AI tool for tasks I drudge and will never get around to. Would like more information about that specifically.
Omg Chat GPT for emails and replies is genius. Love these tips!
I really want to start my own business! But I’m very nervous of the whole talking to customers thing, so it probably won’t happen
This information is helpful for every day adulthood as well. Thank you 😊
Really interesting and informative video. I'm still awaiting diagnosis for autism (just under 4 years waiting for nhs appointment!). Currently employed but struggling, so self employment may be a pathway to consider. Thanks again for creating this video.
I am in the U.S. and I just found out that your local chapter of the autism society helps with coaching. I have to look into it more, but that might be a good place to start.
Great video Sam. I'm not self employed, but have recently been considering it an option for the future. It sounds very tough and demanding in many ways (although working for the man obviously has its own challenges as well), but seeing neurodivergent women such as yourself find success in a self-employed role gives me some confidence. Thank you for the tips!
My problem is continually having to reinvent on how to find hacks that work because after all while things that did work really well just stop working. It's frustrating and exhausting but equally I know that I can do it because I've done it thousands of times before. Thank you for your video and so glad you are back ❤
I think there is some great stuff in this video whether you're self-employed or not. Personally, while I do think about self-employment as a change from my current employment. It's hard to see what I could actually do (what do I make, sell, consult on, train people to do), that's going to be of sufficient value. You mentioned that in the video and about having a collection of experience and qualifications where others don't see the common links. While in my case I can see everything links to some aspect of STEM I'm still struggling to see how I might convert that into something.
Autism coaches that come to your house? Must be the only country to offer that, I think in 99% of countries that's not a thing (and I'm in the EU as well, we generally have good health care).
Support of any kind is very rare in most countries as far as I'm aware. The only autism-specific support I get is a (private!) self-help group that meets maybe 4-5 times a year...
Finding a therapist that has any non-outdated (or any at all) knowledge about autism is futile.
So I guess most of us can't basically hope for a lot of outside help. That's why UA-cam channels like yours are so important; I get most of the relevant tipps for living with autism from here!
Yeah I am wondering about this. I am officially diagnosed and living in the Netherlands. Because they classified me as high functioning, the only coaching I got is private (and I still do because I need it). It's a right here to ask for help, but actually getting it approved and the funding? Not for all. I know because I am a social worker too 😅
Great ideas and the email message footer is a great idea.
I currently do Door Dash for work here in the US. It works for the most part. The hardest part is the innertia and getting myself out of the house. Also frustration intolerance if a particular order or shift is not going well its difficult to not end my shift early and just go home.
Yo Sam, it's good to see again!
INSOMNIA ...
There is very little support or assistance in my present area. However, I am getting together with a group in a different city, not too far away, and am thinking of seeing if there would be any way that an autism group can assist me locally with obtaining a space for an hour a week, and facilitating my own group here.
I'm trying to understand why vagueness and ambiguity is such a stumbling block. Is it this idea of "mind blindness" and "delayed processing" in conjunction with ambiguity that exacerbates the autistic weakness of information processing? In a professional setting, at least in my experience, as an electronic engineer, as my work is mostly solo oriented, where I am highly skilled and respected, these issues don't negatively affect me. It's primarily in the social aspects of my life, where it wreaks havoc.
I don't think saying you work part time hours is rude. It's setting boundaries.
Super useful advice Sam! I’m not self employed but I’m a PhD student with lots of different research appointments that are all self motivated so it sometimes feels like I’m self employed 😂 but great tips for people who are not self employed but who work in places with very low supervision and require LOTS of self motivation
thanks for putting out this content. i'm investigating these subjects for myself and my partner. this is all very helpful
Really useful video Sam, THANKYOU! And i LOVE the outtake bits at the end so much, take care xx
Such a relevant video for me. Thank you for the very sound advice. 😊
You're so welcome!
We are close in age and you are such an inspiration to me! I’ve benefitted from other AuDHD UA-camrs but they are all in their younger 20’s so it’s often difficult to relate and some suggestions just don’t work at this stage of life. I cannot tell you how thankful I am to have discovered your channel. You are a beacon of hope and I truly appreciate your work and your mission 🙏🏼 🩷.
I would love to hear how you manage burnout as a parent! I am a first time mother to a 15 month old. I would do anything for him but my trauma and neurodivergence make me feel like I’m failing as a parent even if logically I may not be. I want another child but am terrified I won’t be able to survive. Knowing you have multiples, your insight would be most invaluable 🙏🏼.
this advice is really great.
for Aussie Autistic lovelies there are some Occupational therapy companies out there that can help you learn to drive. And some of them are covered by NDIS. Know that I"m 39 and have yet to get my license even after 2 tries. But one day I will when I can get past how intimidating it is, and can afford a car. (p.s. AuDHD and ptsd here)
9:36 THIS!
I am from The Netherlands but live in Austria, and I really haven't found anything useful to help me with stuff in my life I deal with because of being autistic... Definitely not in the way that these things were available back when I lived in NL. Here, so much of the discourse around autism is still about stereotypical 8 year old boys. Any support organisations I've found are either focused on children or their parents, and there is still very much this idea of "high functioning" and "low functioning" autism. It's so frustrating... And I'm currently a PhD student, but when I finish my studies I feel like to be able to work a job in an organisation or to navigate being self employed (because honestly I can't imagine being able to work a normal job) I would need some help from the type of coach you can get in The Netherlands. So I hope that somehow in the next few years this will become more common here in Austria as well.
Can you please add chapters to your videos, especially for videos like this
Its so hard to sit through these and hear the important bits
Anyone have any tips for literally starting? I don't know the first steps. Can't picture them.
Make a list of things you enjoy doing and are good at (e.g., photography, cooking, writing, tutoring students, etc. ) and how you might get started part-time. In the US, the SBA - small business association - has retired business owners who will mentor you for free, offer tax help, etc. You can also shadow someone for a day, maybe videotaping the workflow. UA-cam also has hundreds of videos on self-employment, freelancing, and work-from-home jobs.
I have dual diagnosis I’d love to be an actor
SO good tips! Thank you Sam!
Is there any support for folks who are self-diagnosed (UK)?
Forgot to say great video, thanks! I didn't think your email footer was too rude, btw...
In the USA there is a job program for people who are disabled to help them get jobs. It is called DVR. I don't know how much they would help with self employment but it might be worth a try.
Hey good to see you back! I've had aspergers since birth and if it's not uncomfortable I'd like to ask you question which I don't know if you've answered already before. What kind, if any, od supplements, nootropics or drugs do you take? I'm trying to help myself as much as possible also in thia way, so it's a huge help! Thanks
Id love to own a business, but having both myself aswell i understand completely, id need a manager if i did own a business though probably :3
Unfortunately, I live in the US. I am newly self diagnosed at 59. My journey since May has been rough. Maybe someone in the states can help me out if they have found support. 😢
I live in the US & there isn't really anything at all 😑 i applied for disability benefits the year i was diagnosed, provided my decade of diverse work history, & they denied my app from the jump because i didn't "have enough work credit." Soooooo..... am i to understand that there are benefits available for people with conditions that render them unable to support themselves fully in a way they can live with, but only if i first spend 20 years trying in order to prove it enough??
They is ssi for p😢who are disabled and not enough work history
It is very common for people applying for disability benefits in the US to be denied first time, definitely apply again!
At first I doubted your divergence…then you went off script and I was like “there she is!!!” You sped up and your hands went all over. I enjoyed seeing you.
Is what you said for the footer rude…I can see it getting lost in text. But hearing you say it didn’t sound rude.
I want to work from home but don't know where to start . I have to do something but not sure what
Using generative aI for chat bots to better communicate with NTs sounds like a great idea. After all, the machine learning model is trained mostly on data generated by NTs, I'm assuming.
BTW, remind me to have a word with your video editor, I have some minor pointers. :D
let's talk ;)
The background sensory overload 🤯
Hey, I'm wondering if there's a (group of) british mum(s) in the Netherlands (autistic or not) I could get in contact with 😊 If you know please reply, thank you in advance ❤
Ohh wow you use a teleprompter? You look so natural. So does it help a lot with filming videos? :) Thanks
“Even in the USA where they don’t support anyone..” 😂
My specific struggle is NTs
It's probably an advantage when you are self-employed and the system doesn't work, you can just the system, you are the boss making decisions. while when you're employed somewhere and your boss is not really concerned with your wellbeing, and completely clueless about autistic, and to drive his/hers bonus implements for example a change to your working hours, and tells you that you start early mornings from next week, and you know it won't work for you, than what? than you're living a nightmare.
Nope, there's no support in the USA
To me the self employed is the only way.
WHEWWW! I can NOT do entrepreneurship 😅 Idk how y'all do it. I tried & ended up doing absolutely nothing after a while. I also burned out in half the time it takes me in traditional jobs.
planning naps planning naps yes yes yes!
Ha! In the USA where they don’t support anyone. Yep.
Wait, did you just say "In the Netherlands, _we_ have autism coaches"? Haha, wat is het vandaag koud he. 😅
This channel has to be one of the biggest whinge fests on UA-cam. Seriously, there are so many channels like this now which just go on and on about fake victimhood and struggle blah blah. I hope most the comments are bots and not actual people typing things like "omg this resonated with me so much, sending positive vibes." If you want to help yourself you need to stop watching mental health attention seeking channels like this and go outside and exercise. See a psychotherapist if you want, it can help as these struggles are just part of life, nothing more. These channels will actually reinforce victimhood in yourself and a dependency on para social relationships which will keep you coming back for more. I am sure this lady is a pretty decent person but these trendy mental health videos like many on UA-cam are exploiting vulnerable groups of people for views and ultimately money. There are many, many people who often have just mild traits of ADHD/Autism which although you should be aware of, it means very little in the scheme of things. There are a small amount of people who have true forms of ADHD/Autism and I can assure you their lives have absolutely nothing in common with these sugar coated videos. These people actually have seriously miserable struggles and these social media trend videos are an insult to people with true forms of ADHD/Autism.
I’m in the U.S., so nada/zilch/zip…..