This is a perfect reason why we need to stop telling everyone to have children. A lot of people don’t need to be parents. I’m so sorry if y’all experienced something like this
The oldest of 4 children here. I do not remember too many memories of my childhood, abuse happened a lot. However, the part that made me wake up was being sold to a previous partner of theirs, in the hope that they would use their wealth to make life easier for the parent. They introduced me to a narc who tried to kill me & when I asked them for help, they told me I couldn't move back in & to find someplace of my own, all while living in fear for my life for some more months. I got a place of my own. Walked away with nothing from that dark place & now the parent is shocked that I only talk to them on the surface about things like the weather. I cannot connect with them past a superficial level or I feel the hate bubbling to the surface. I'm a great mother now & won't take parenting or any advice from her. Drives her nuts but I don't care. She thinks I'm being spiritually manipulated because I was always the model child but never, I AM FREE.
Most are stuck at home with their parents because they are broke otherwise most adult children move far far away just to get a piece of mind because parents will use your youth up just running up and down for them everyday and your only payment is food and you should be great full. So I agree with you I can't get mad at a child who moves far away and just goes no contact for peace and get some rest.
If your kids don't want to speak to you, you f'ed up. It goes against human nature to reject your own parents, all they have to do is the very bare minimum to have their children want their approval. So when it becomes apparent to the child that approval is weaponized and withheld on purpose, it's an act of self-preservation to get away from those people.
This is why I find it weird when reports say that there is an increase of mental health issues with the younger generation. This is not correct ….our parents were batshit crazy but undiagnosed!
Agree, then you have those like my mother who is aware that mental illnesses run on at least one side of her family but believes that she is exempt from having those and never cares to seek help bc there’s no issue to her.
All the time! Whenever I would remind my mother of something she said or did it was always "I don't remember that", which apparently translates to "it didn't happen"
The most hurtful part is that they honestly have no idea they ever did anything wrong. And they paint that narrative everywhere. So you’re iced out. Depression inducing
I stand on the theory that narcissists lie to everyone, themselves first. So they truly believe that they’re right bc they’ve coached themselves into it
Seriously I don't understand these parents! They abuse their children until adulthood and once their adult children leave the home and enforce either No Contact or Low Contact they get surprised and ask themselves "Why Don't My Children Talk To Me?". Erm, there are consequences for your abuse! I am No Contact with one of my parents and last month of the two year anniversary of cutting them off, and I had peace ever since!
I'm an only child , but I'm not the first child . My older brother died when he was still an infant . I remember when I dropped out of college due to depression and multiple suìCiđaL attempts , my mom said " I wish you would have died instead of your brother " , that somehow gave me the will to live but I'll never forgive her ... and she denied ever saying it 😑
Narc moms are like that, they say the most hurtful things ever in the heat of the moment and then deny it later. Sometimes their mask slips and you see that they know they said it, but are trying to gaslight you. Mine did this all the time and in 2014 it caused me to have a nervous breakdown cause I started questioning reality. Went no contact with her in 2018 and have never looked back. I choose my life over some fantasy of a good relationship with her.
I have narcissistic parents, and I will never understand why horrible people get to be parents. And others that would have been great parents never get the chance.
Hearing the horrors that these people went through as children is appalling😢 The people telling their stories are the ones that actually survived the horrendous behavior of their parents during their childhood. There are many, many more who don't even get the chance to survive. However, there are still people who feel justified in calling "childless by choice" women selfish and unaware of the realities of our decision. But these narcissistic-abusive-trama-causing parents are what, if not "selfish and unaware," of the impact of their choice to become parents and inflict such atrocious behavior on their children...smdh
Weirdest one for me was when I was 17 and in my senior year of high school. I got the *rare* chance to visit my relatives in another state for the summer. Was the best time of my life, not having to live in utter terror and anxiety for once. Loved it so much, I decided I wanted to go to college there. I saw a whole new life there and I was so excited. Told my parents, and my dad went full Armageddon. Called and demanded my other adult siblings come to the house for an “urgent” meeting about me. Sat everyone at the table and went *in* on me- yelling and telling me I was lazy, a bad student (had a B-average. He never helped with school, but expected straight-As and took full credit for my achievements), said I was incapable of being able to live and make it on my own, how immature and stupid I was that I wouldn’t be able to function enough to rent a place, pay bills and go to school, and threatened to take the car they bought back from me if I still decided to go. He said (I kid you not), *”You won’t have a car, how are you going to get a job and get money?? Because I’m not giving you any money for school or anything, you’re not going. And if you find your way up there anyway, you will FAIL and I hope you FAIL. And you can’t come back here when you fail, don’t come back asking me to help you!”* My entire family just sat there, nodding in agreement. I was stunned. I tried to defend myself, but was barked down by everyone as “disrespectful, ungrateful and rude” for wanting to jeopardize losing my car and my parents’ support at home over having the chance to grow. He cut me off from having contact with those relatives (this was the 90s, so no SM or other ways to call). To this day, they believe I’m the one who never wanted to keep in touch, and never respond to my attempts to reach out. Narcissist Dad already destroyed every relationship ahead of time to make sure I never had a chance. What made things worse was being stuck, and seeing my neighbors’ daughters and friends graduate and go off to college, with their families’ full blessings and financial support. I’d see their parents talking to my dad after coming back from visiting them on campus, sharing how much they were so proud of their children and how happy they were for them. In my 40s now with my own family, but it still hurts to think about it sometimes 😢.
What the fuck is up with these parents hating on their own kids for doing better than what they could? Did either of your parents graduate college? Neither of mine did and I found out as an adult they hid a letter for me about getting accepting into a college. Just to make sure I didn’t succeed past them. Petty as fuck.
I had really bad cramps as a teenager and stayed home from school, it hurt so bad I didn't want to leave my bed or my bedroom and mostly slept for hours, my dad got upset that I didn't run to meet him when he called out for me, I was asleep, so he responded by flipping over the living room table and breaking the glass. My mom explained why I didn't come to him, mind you, he could have just as easily knocked on my door and checked on me. Also, he didn't need anything from me he just liked having me and my sibling run to him when he called.
I have so many stories, but I’d rather say to those who are still dealing with or healing from narcissistic parents that it’s not your fault. Be the person who breaks the cycle. If you were judged, choose understanding. If you were rejected, choose acceptance. If you were shamed, choose compassion. Become the person you needed when you were hurting, not the person who hurt you. Heal instead of becoming bitter so you can act from your heart.. not your pain.
One day, when I was around 16, I decided that I wanted to go to college for elementary education. My narc father had other plans. He always insisted that I go into engineering. When I finally told him I wanted to be a teacher, you would have thought I had declared I wanted to start doing drugs and selling myself. We literally had a physical altercation over this. Needless to say, I moved out at 17, and he signed off on all financial responsibility for me. It really was a win/win.
He sucked, but I'm glad he signed the papers and let you go. The silver lining in a shit storm. My dad kept claiming me and just wouldn't give me his taxes to use for school. Them not being open to emancipation, even though I went to college a year early at 16/17, messed me up financially until I graduated college. I'm honestly surprised we graduated
My mom's weirdest tantrum was when she yelled and threatened to cut me off financially for PLANNING to change the foreign language that I would study during my freshman year of high school. 😑
My dad refused to eat dinner unless he was served: first, the biggest portion, and no veggies. If veggies were ever on the plate we had to remake the whole plate bc “be could taste the vegetable juice on the other food”
Sorry you went thru that, I think it's ridiculous that parents have their kids serve them, my parents were the same way. We also didn't get to spend a lot of time with them, they were always in their room. They use to have these days call "home days" and that's when we were allowed to chill with them in their room, they were always home just not around us, so the name doesn't make sense but it usually just consisted of us bringing them their food, my oldest sister rubbing my dad's feet for hours and us cleaning their room and closet 😂
My father also never touches vegetables he always says "I'm not eating grass cause I'm not a cow. While at the same time he used to scream hell of abuse on my mother that he got diabetes because of "her bad cooking" and that sheade him sick. Never the candies he ate in tones. As hes not a cow.
19:46 Our parents and other elders got away with a lot of 💩because they extorted us to be quiet. This is pretty much why I went no contact with my whole family because as an adult even the eyewitnesses were gaslighting about whether or not anything ever happened. I’ve been estranged from my family for about 20 years and I don’t miss the reunions but I do miss that one auntie (RIP).
11:00 My heart goes out to her, my mom was like this too. And when my dad came home from work, she would make up stories about things we did. So then he would be upset with us for giving her grief, whole time she would be lying.
It’s interesting that several people here said their upbringing was the reason why they decided to not have children. That was definitely the main reason I didn’t have any. What kind of parent would I be if I never saw a good example of one?
Omg...I have a Narcissistic aunt (my moms sis). The stories I have from her unyielding hell! Decades of stories! I wish nothing but healing for those who encounter narcissists, psychopaths and sociopaths! 🙏🏾🙏🏾
It's basically a lifelong healing journey. The trauma is sooo deep. You end up questioning yourself, overthinking everything, being depressed/anxious, and not having the best relationships.
The demonic maternal carrier assigned to me punched me in the chest as well mind you I was teen that weighed about 115 wet and she was at least 300 pounds
OMG! My mom would do the thing where she'd completely dump out my drawers and pull everything out of my closet. The gift thing was an issue as well. Very entitled and mean at times. Emotional and physical abuse from both parents. 😔 Could never do it to my boys. It's soul crushing
I bet all of these narc parents are also the same type of people who flex about being parents or say to people when they're losing an argument about kids/parenting "dO yOU eVEn HaVE kIDs?!". Yep.
After this last Thanksgiving I had enough. Was in the car w/ mom and dad, me and dad have been drinking mom is driving. It's a new car so she asks him where the parking brake is, he didn't hear her. I spoke up and asked again, he IMMEDIATELY flips out, everyone is a mother effer, we're trying to drive he's telling my mom she's driving erratically and starts swinging his body around, I tell him he needs to stop or he can find his own way home because he was going to have us in an accident. I'm a mother effer, he tries to jump out of a moving vehicle and honestly at this point who cares right.... Anyway my mom and I ended up at my uncle's house for the night and made him find his own way home. I'm done with that man and it looks like that decision cost me my mother too. What happens when pick mes grow up? This .
Listening to the Lady @ 10:55 was like listening to someone recall my childhood. My mother expected perfection. The last tantrum was two years ago over a plant light. I severed ties over a year ago but, I still grieve. For years I excused her behavior due to her childhood trauma. But I realize that only enabled her behavior and abuse. 15:54 is all too common, they target and pick someone to unleash their rage on (pets are not excluded from this).
I was suicidal from age fourteen. I was so depressed and traumatized by things that had happened in my life, and the craziness of my family situation. I begged my parents to get me psychological help, but they refused. I staggered on for the next ten or so years, and made one relatively serious attempt at suicide. My life was an ongoing crisis because i was just so f*cked up. I couldn’t afford a therapist and for years I could not get a doctor to take me seriously enough to refer me to help. But FINALLY I got some help. My mother was deeply hurt, would not stop crying about how some stranger, who she would never meet, might think she was a bad mother. She fought against me getting help even though my life was a disaster. To this day, I think she would rather I had died, than that she might have to look at her own failings.
I have always said this to myself before and say it again: Not everyone is meant to be a parent nor should they even try. And being a childfree person, like myself, helps prevent you from being the monster you know you can wind up being. Getting to know yourself and who you are as a person is both terrifying but enlightening and also very much needed in the face of humanity (for all humans of all ages). Looking at this video makes me feel so sad and angry because I had parents, family members, just like the ones in this video and I'm glad I went no contact with them. I'm glad the victims of this ab*se have a voice.
Refusing to give my mother thousands of dollars because she overdrafted her account. Shes terrible with money. And the bonus was she was going on vacation where she was going to gamble. I later “divorced” her and the rest of my family because they were all a bunch of narcissists for other reasons. It was honestly like escaping a cult
The random fits of rage mother was very relatable. My mother also became very violent and aggressive when our rooms were even a little untidy. She would do things like tip shelves over, knock things off from surfaces, etc. She blames it all on "being stressed" now, which isn't and excuse to be violent and aggressive to your own children
I don't believe my mom was a narcissist but looking back on her (sometimes) extreme anger towards us kids, I feel like she was extremely unhappy being a parent. That's why I am happy being able to have the choice to not have kids, bc I know I don't have the emotional bandwidth to care for them.
Exactly. I know for a fact that my mother’s treatment of me was a big part of me deciding to not have children. I felt like I had no idea how to be a good parent because I never had a good example of how to be one, and I certainly wasn’t going to mess up another generation.
@carmenlarose4072 I understand what you're saying. I've been around kids since the age of 8 (I have older siblings) and I always knew kids weren't for me. I love them but I also love it when they leave lol
6 місяців тому+16
My mom likes to talk major ish about her bf's daughters who are literally my friends and I told her to stop taking to me about them because I don't like hearing what she has to say about them, and she lost her dang mind begging me to have a conversation with her about why she ISN'T talking ish. I told her that what she says may be true, but the way she says it is straight up meangirl ish. For example, the daughters still live with their father and depend on him...uh yeah- cause they're fresh outta highschool. Not the point, but the way she talked about that was "the older one doesn't pay for anything herself. she's still living off of daddy's money." Ummm? Cause he went to the store and she asked for a bag of chips? *I* depend on her and she doesn't talk about me like I'm a moocher. It's just such icky behavior and I don't wanna hear it. She called me rude for not wanting to talk about it anymore. I literally don't need an explanation for what you're trying to say- just stop saying it to me. How are you gonna throw a fit because I don't wanna hear you talk about my friends who are your boyfriend's daughters. How are you gonna throw a fit because I don't want to have a conversation in general? ESPECIALLY ONE THAT DOESN'T MATTER OMG. My dad also used to ask me if I had a problem if I didn't laugh at his jokes. Used to because I cut him off
Some of these parents sound like they have undiagnosed borderline disorder... Grew up with a parent with it and the tantrums and shifting moods are INSANE!
Weirdest tantrum my mom ever threw: she asked me to clean her fridge, which I did immediately. I wasted no time, not even a minute, I went straight to her fridge, cleaned it out, washed it down, and refilled it. She got so pissed and yelled at me literally two inches from my face, spit flying everywhere, about how I was a b**ch and stressing her out and to go f**k myself. This was last year. I lived with her temporarily because she's disabled and I went there to help her out. I work fulltime, was paying everything (mortgage, insurance, water/elec, internet) except her cigarettes, drove her to her doc appointments, took care of her 3 cats and large dog, did ALL the chores and laundry, did the shopping with my own car and gas, paid all the groceries by myself (this included food for me, her, and her boyfriend who is also disabled), and shovelled the snow all alone. I helped fix things around her house, and when her car had problems, I brought it to the garage myself and paid for it to be repaired. I even gave her money to help have her teeth fixed. Once that tantrum happened, I said NOPE and left a few months after cause it took a bit to find an affordable apartment. I went no contact and haven't spoken to her in a year. She didn't even text me on my birthday. She was terrible my whole life, and I tried SO HARD to have a good relationship with her but at 34 I realized it isn't possible.
My narcissistic/abusive father died from brain cancer 2 years ago, and while I was staying at my parents' home, doing hospice care, my narcissistic mother told me I was stressing her out worse than my father was by dying, because I wanted to buy her a new dish rack.
@@zilness yeah, that was when the blinders really started to come off. My father was so unpleasant, it was easy to think that he's the problem, and my mother is a victim. But he was, at least, really mentally ill and had suffered terrible abuse as a child. She's just a codependent pick-me who neglected her kids so she could spend forty years arguing with my dad, and always acts like nothing is her fault, or her responsibility. Once he was dead, I saw how she's kind of a monster, and worse than he was in a lot of ways. I haven't spoken to her in almost a year now, it's amazing how quickly you can heal, and how many repressed memories started coming up, once you are not under constant emotional attack.
The weirdest tantrums my mom would throw were always when I dropped something, or anything like that while she was in a different room. My mom would literally throw something across the room she was in, to the extent that it startled me, and said, "see, I can throw things too!" The first time it happened, I told her I dropped something. Her reply: "Oh". As it kept happening though, I just stopped wasting my energy to open my mouth and give an explanation.
My mom cut me out of family pictures and hung them back up on the wall when I went to visit my dad who she hated. I was 18 and not living in her house.
I Notice that a lot of people who aren't into spiritual Enlightenment or life and a people who are considered awake. What is a lot of these young people who are breaking generational curses? Cause the stuff that we are talking about narcissists. Devastating to people's lives. And it's like I applaud these young people speak it about this. I'm 44 years old and I'm just finding out what my mother was and how I was treated. I'm a survivor.
I have both a narcissistic, mom and dad, but I grew up with my mom since my dad married my mom’s sister. I have so many stories that I could tell. A few years ago, my mom was living with my sister and my sister went to jail. She never asked to borrow any money, but got mad at me because I went to go get a tattoo done in Las Vegas. She took it out on me because how dare I do something for myself, a grown adult, when she’s struggling. One time she blame me for my sister‘s car getting repossessed. She felt that it was my fault because I was trying to buy a house at the time and she stated that they found her car at my house because the process made my information public.
I started my response to a question he asked me with "well..." and he went off on my for 'talking to him crazy' I belive his exact first words were "dont f*cking talking to me like that!" Random morning.
I remember I asked for in the car in the 4th grade, happy and asked my mom how her day was. She literally said, “Shut the fuck up. I’m not talking to you. Clearly it wasn’t good”. She was always angry, btw. Nothing had to happen for her to be engaged. I’m sorry 😞
Omg these are awful. It hurts me to hear them. I literally crying right now. These stories were a lot even though the ppl telling them laugh I can only imagine how their hearts hurt. Such abuse.
Videos like this and seeing all the Comments make me feel I have a community. Because if you are alone as the scapegoat of the family with a narcissistic mother, you can feel crazy, like you’re the only one in the world going through things like this. Sending love to you all and thank you all for sharing pieces of your personal story. ❤💯
Videos like this and hearing the stories of my friends and co-workers over the years have shown me how blessed me and my sister were to be born to my parents. Some people are not meant to be parents and I am so grateful that mine were ready. ❤
My father went ballistic in a restaurant. Kicking chairs and screaming at me cause of cinnamonrolls. It was my first time making cinnamonrolls and i followed the recipe to the T. They came out gigantic like thensize of my hand. And he kept sayibg they're too big so i just said it's my first time and i just followed the recipe. Boom! "Don't ever make anymore fucking cinnamonrolls again! Bla bla bla" Another time he went crazy cause my mom didn't remove the plastic that keeps cake slices from drying out in the fridge. I hate my dad
My father is extremely negative, pessimistic, and cynical. He is very stubborn and committed to his perspective and unwilling to make adjustments in his communication with me. The last straw was when I recently shared news of my FIRST pregnancy. I am 30 years old! He was very argumentative and unsupportive. I walked out and wrote a message that I don’t want him in my life anymore. I will never forgive him or welcome him into my life/family with my new baby.
I just had my baby and I had post-partum depression. I was crying because I had no sleep, was hungry and overwhelmed. My mom looked at me with tears in her eyes and asked "why do you have an attitude with me?" I just look like 😳🤯and continued to cry....
My mom never liked it when I received any kind of attention. I'm talking from a young age too. She wanted to be the center of attention, especially when it came to men. My mom would always comment on how stupid I was, my clothes were too this or that (Jean and a t shirt y'all, she slut shamed me), she would rip up my art work. Yep. My senior year, I was asked by my Art teachers to apply for a full ride scholarship for Art. My mom was so mad, she took that paperwork, told me to follow her outside and proceeded to burn the application in our outside fire pit. She then burned any art I created or any art supply she could find of mine. She denied she ever did it to the day she died.
These parents will never remember the incidents, they will literally look at us dumbfounded, like we’re making it up. I can relate with Destiny, had to grow up fast, cook and clean. That’s why I will always be the best auntie or Titi or Zia, never the parent I’m all the way good.
My mom was psycho... once during school I missed the morning bus because it came and went early. I walked back home from the bus stop to tell her I missed the bus and she flipped her lid, calling me a useless r-slur. She drove me to school, which was perfect for her narcissistic raging because I was trapped in the car and had to listen to her screaming at me. She was speeding and driving erratically btw. Anyway, later that evening the school called to aplogize about the bus driver missing a bunch of students. And nope she didn't apologize
One day when I was talking with my mom at the kitchen table. I told her wanted to get a Monroe piercing. My dad came in the kitchen during the conversation. He said a smart comment. After saying I didnt care about what he likes or doesnt like, my dad threw juice in my face.
That first story hurt my heart bless that sister for going through that all because her mother was jealous over a gift 💝 why not buy it yaself make it make sense the kids still treated her she’s an ungrateful ass!
I recently found out my mother blamed me for my father s. abusing me. She says bc she taught me to speak up but the gag is I was too scared because I thought she wouldn’t believe me and would kick me out. You’re the drama, not me. I’ve stopped taking to her since. That’s probably not even the worst either of them have done to me.
My mom once came to my high school stage event.I was in charge of setting up the stage and it was a bunch of kids getting awards for various things and she turned to me and complained that "Why I wasn't getting awards like this? Or "why am I not applying myself?" These were awards for debate and math leagues. I did tennis after school 🎾 mine you she made me do a sport after school cuz she believed it would keep us out of trouble.....didn't work for my sister
@12:05 my jaw fell to the ground because my mom did this to me quite often. I think sometimes I would just come home and everything would be flipped the details are blurry I’ve forgotten it for years.
Got in trouble for washing my hair before doing my chores. Step mom was knocking on the door asking me what I was doing. I just wanted to use the bathroom before it smelled of cleaners.
One thing I've learned is that children of narcissists can adopt narcissistic traits but not have full blown NPD. If I remember correctly, we all exhibit narcissism to a degree bc of self preservation and such. However, it can turn into patterns, behaviors, or a personality disorder. We don't know what's exactly the reason or why yet, so there really isn't no telling when it progresses. That being said Ms Destiny she could've been narcissistic in how she dealt w/you but not a person w/NPD. Narcs wouldn't do that out of concern for their children bc their only concern is themselves sadly
And these older parents really are trying to figure out why their millennial children are putting them in nursing homes and not visiting them. 😵💫😵💫😵💫
I have been writing in journals for a majority of my life, so a lot of the tantrum stories I have are documented in them. There are so many, especially from 2021, that I don’t even know what to share. One of the weirdest is when she called me while I was at a friend’s dorm celebrating the release of Red TV, to yell at me about how I messed up setting up the tables at my job for the event the next day. Mind you, I was setting them up after a birthday party as a favor for my skating club, I wasn’t even directed to do so by my boss. But I had to go at the end of my shift because I had plans, so I remember I just tried to set up the room as close to what was needed as I remembered, after a several hour long shift. She said I “ruined so and so’s day” and that I had to “explain why I did it wrong.” She told me to apologize to them, and I did, thinking I really did ruin their day, but they just said “it’s ok”. And that’s when I realized that, hey, she is the only one making me feel bad here. She said “too bad there’s nothing you can do to make this right” clearly expecting me to drop all of my plans to go fix my mistake. And then “is there anything else you have to say for yourself?” I have the nerve to say “nope, I think that’s it.” And go back to my plans. I was an adult, being spoken to like a child. This may seem rather mild but it is a bold example of why I thought growing up that it’s acceptable for others to make mistakes, but not for me to. And I definitely did make mistakes, so it led to a loooooot of self hatred.
Not only was I being s. abused by my father he always would pick on me and one day after I got out of school I got a whooping bc my hair was misplaced after school bc my mom had just done it. I was maybe 6 or 7? My hair was already unhealthy and short thanks to my mom so there wasn’t much to work with plus a hot Texas day and recess was not my friend. So I got a whooping. That’s not even the worst of it. One time I got a meaningless whooping and my mom just sat in the bedroom and drank a beer. No consoling or anything. Let her tell it she was an incredible mother with zero issues. I don’t talk to her anymore and he has been in prison since 03
@@YabbaDabbaDooooo Thank you so much I am! That is a major reason I decided to go no contact. I couldn’t heal because she was still actively being a jerk and trying to manipulate me and my child. Thank you so much for your well wishes
I wasnt there for this one because i had already gone NC with my mother, but i heard from an older cousin that i still talk to that, when one of my little cousins (i believe she was in her early 20s) committed the big S, my mother appearantly went to a family meet(not sure what you would call it but when the family gets together after the event happens) and threw a fit because the leg on her walker was broken. It makes me glad i stay away. RIP to my baby cousin
My aunt(narcissist, con artist) gave me and my sibling money to get food. We also got a cheesecake. I gave her the change. She said, what happened. I showed her the food and the cheesecake. She screamed like someone was killing her. Me and my sibling starred. So we never ate. The food went bad. We didn't eat the $4 cheesecake either and it went bad too. The cops came by the townhomes. The neighbors called because they thought someone was being deleted. She got mad again because the neighbors that called were a different race. This same aunt lied to me in 7th grade about stealing my Nintendo and pawning it. She lied twice & said she gave it to the less fortunate. Then lied again said it melted in the back seat. I found a pawn shop receipt later. I think she stold my walkman too. She later got be up for cheating w/ the pastor. This lady still tried to stalk me on LinkedIn. She said, she is giving all her stuff to me. She is still broke at 70 yrs old. She has a daughter that won't talk to her. The aunt later went to prison for stealing from a church. 😂
She never took responsibility for what she did to me and was always the victim. 6 years no contact. My younger brother abused me physically when i was pregnant and my mother knew about it about instead she didn't check to find out if i and baby are okay nope instead this woman blamed me for arresting my younger brother for hitting me when i was pregnant and pushed me to the floor. Till today she still holds that grudge and my younger brother still holds that grudges of something that happened 6 years ago and never apologise or held him accountable. He became a narcissist like my narc mother. I love my peace now and dont regret cutting this people off for good because the older they got they worse they become. My younger brother has never held a job down and kept getting arrested for drugs or weapon possession and he dropped out of school age 16
I can’t do it nomore. Mines getting worse as she ages. Stoped talking to her for 3 years. I was going through a lot and she said she wanted to help but wants to infantilize , control me and tell me what to do. She throws tantrums like a child she won’t listen she talks over me broo. At least her mom trying to do better and she wants to change mine will not change she’s getting herself and I’m tired of it. I’m already down and she’s kicking me while I’m Down.
It seems this narcisstic behaviours are human behaviour as opposed to it being racial. It’s really sad to hear this. I do hope we are better humans to people and our children.
I couldn't move out of state for college because my narc mom threatened to have me abducted and returned if I left her. She also made my friends talk to her for at least a half hour before she gave me the phone. Sometimes she would tell them I wasn't there at all. When I started dating someone who wouldn't entertain her and just ask for me, she tried to forbid me from seeing him.
My narc dad threw a tantrum because when i bought a house 3 years ago, it was bigger than his. It was also DISHEVELED! I could only afford it because it needs A LOT of work, but nooooooo, its bigger so now im "gaudy, selfish and narcissistic". They really do tell on themselves 🤦🏻♀️ i havent spoken to him since, changed my number and everything.
I live in New England and it get cold but heat is so expensive so I would watch the thermostat especially because I was the only one working, my able bodied mother only went to church and took money from me and yes we lived together. Anyways my nephew was like 9 months at the time and my mother had the stovetop on and it was a gas stove and my nephew was in his walker, I told my mom “why would this be on if the baby is rolling around, you can just turn the heat up” (anything for the babies of course) well she threw her cup full of juice at me and flipped over the table right around the baby and I wasn’t phased by it just because she is a terrible actress 🤣 we don’t live together anymore
The clothes out the drawer, I use to do to my daughters when they were young. I'd done it like three or four times. I did it because my mom used to do it to us. I thought that was right. Crazy. How I stopped is because I allowed my daughters to talk to me and express their feelings about it, and I realized that me doing this was really unnecessary and that all I had to do was communicate with them. So I stopped. Communicate with your children. Allow them to communicate with you
This is a perfect reason why we need to stop telling everyone to have children. A lot of people don’t need to be parents. I’m so sorry if y’all experienced something like this
100% Agree
This. 100 percent this.
All of this!!!
The oldest of 4 children here. I do not remember too many memories of my childhood, abuse happened a lot.
However, the part that made me wake up was being sold to a previous partner of theirs, in the hope that they would use their wealth to make life easier for the parent.
They introduced me to a narc who tried to kill me & when I asked them for help, they told me I couldn't move back in & to find someplace of my own, all while living in fear for my life for some more months.
I got a place of my own. Walked away with nothing from that dark place & now the parent is shocked that I only talk to them on the surface about things like the weather.
I cannot connect with them past a superficial level or I feel the hate bubbling to the surface.
I'm a great mother now & won't take parenting or any advice from her.
Drives her nuts but I don't care.
She thinks I'm being spiritually manipulated because I was always the model child but never, I AM FREE.
SHOULDN'T be is what you mean
This is the reason I'm never mad at adult children who go no contact. So many shitty narcisstic parents, they should never be parents.
Most are stuck at home with their parents because they are broke otherwise most adult children move far far away just to get a piece of mind because parents will use your youth up just running up and down for them everyday and your only payment is food and you should be great full.
So I agree with you I can't get mad at a child who moves far away and just goes no contact for peace and get some rest.
If your kids don't want to speak to you, you f'ed up. It goes against human nature to reject your own parents, all they have to do is the very bare minimum to have their children want their approval. So when it becomes apparent to the child that approval is weaponized and withheld on purpose, it's an act of self-preservation to get away from those people.
I went NC with my parents for way less than this. These poor people.
Exactly. It’s usually for a good ass reason.
I hate that these people experienced such horrible parents ugggh
This is why I find it weird when reports say that there is an increase of mental health issues with the younger generation. This is not correct ….our parents were batshit crazy but undiagnosed!
This!
Exactly. So many of our parents and grandparents were severely mentally ill or had neurological disorders that went undiagnosed.
Agree, then you have those like my mother who is aware that mental illnesses run on at least one side of her family but believes that she is exempt from having those and never cares to seek help bc there’s no issue to her.
💯
Facts lol
It’s never random. When a parent chooses to ruin an important moment in their child’s life.
I confirm this as a child of a psycho father who wouldn’t let me go to my senior prom💔😭💯
or the WHOLE life
Big facts. 💯
I can relate. My parents still deny EVERYTHING they did to us.
Same. They’ll lie and go revisionist history on you, even if you show them *evidence* of them in the act.
Mines too
Same! Thank god for screenshot and third party recording laws!
@@KAY-sk6tkunfortunately for some of us, there was no such thing as a screenshot or a smart phone when the initial incidents took place.
@@Thislibralovesmoney *mine
Narc parents act like not nothing ever happened lol and they don’t remember
All the time! Whenever I would remind my mother of something she said or did it was always "I don't remember that", which apparently translates to "it didn't happen"
Mine called me an alcoholic today. Mind you, I have never once touched alcohol in my life. And she knows it too.🤦🏽♀️
Videos like this just further prove that everybody should NOT have kids. And a lot of people who have them SHOULD NOT HAVE. So sad.
A lot of people need to not have children!! Please!
The most hurtful part is that they honestly have no idea they ever did anything wrong. And they paint that narrative everywhere. So you’re iced out. Depression inducing
They do. That is why they are doing it. They are demons.
Trust me walking demons u can see it in there eyes omg
I stand on the theory that narcissists lie to everyone, themselves first. So they truly believe that they’re right bc they’ve coached themselves into it
My sister has cancer and my mum is making it all about herself, whilst offering minimal help. My mother is a narc.
Awww that's just FOUL 😢😟😕
Seriously I don't understand these parents! They abuse their children until adulthood and once their adult children leave the home and enforce either No Contact or Low Contact they get surprised and ask themselves "Why Don't My Children Talk To Me?". Erm, there are consequences for your abuse! I am No Contact with one of my parents and last month of the two year anniversary of cutting them off, and I had peace ever since!
YUP! 👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿
I'm an only child , but I'm not the first child . My older brother died when he was still an infant . I remember when I dropped out of college due to depression and multiple suìCiđaL attempts , my mom said " I wish you would have died instead of your brother " , that somehow gave me the will to live but I'll never forgive her ... and she denied ever saying it 😑
Jeezus…what a shitty thing to say to your child. I’m so sorry you went through that 😔
I am so sorry to hear that💔💔
Your mother doesn’t deserve you !! You deserve all the happiness of the world!!
Honestly, no bigger motivation than pure spite. I know exactly what you mean. Narcs wanting me dead helps me pull my head up.
Narc moms are like that, they say the most hurtful things ever in the heat of the moment and then deny it later. Sometimes their mask slips and you see that they know they said it, but are trying to gaslight you. Mine did this all the time and in 2014 it caused me to have a nervous breakdown cause I started questioning reality. Went no contact with her in 2018 and have never looked back. I choose my life over some fantasy of a good relationship with her.
😱🤯🥺😭💔🆘🚩
My GOD that is evil!!! I'm so sorry you had to hear such a disgusting comment and I hope you are far away from her and thriving! 🫂❤️🩹
I have narcissistic parents, and I will never understand why horrible people get to be parents. And others that would have been great parents never get the chance.
These are abusive parents mentally slow parents only two was narcissistic parents
@nwalden5744 True. The woman who was punched by her dad....I said that is beyond narcissism.
Biologically, it’s up to Lady Luck. Socially, responsible people don’t wantonly procreate.
They ALWAYS have, it ust society is broken
OMG, I feel so sorry for these people. What horrible excuses for parents. 😭😭
Hearing the horrors that these people went through as children is appalling😢 The people telling their stories are the ones that actually survived the horrendous behavior of their parents during their childhood. There are many, many more who don't even get the chance to survive. However, there are still people who feel justified in calling "childless by choice" women selfish and unaware of the realities of our decision. But these narcissistic-abusive-trama-causing parents are what, if not "selfish and unaware," of the impact of their choice to become parents and inflict such atrocious behavior on their children...smdh
Weirdest one for me was when I was 17 and in my senior year of high school. I got the *rare* chance to visit my relatives in another state for the summer. Was the best time of my life, not having to live in utter terror and anxiety for once. Loved it so much, I decided I wanted to go to college there. I saw a whole new life there and I was so excited.
Told my parents, and my dad went full Armageddon. Called and demanded my other adult siblings come to the house for an “urgent” meeting about me. Sat everyone at the table and went *in* on me- yelling and telling me I was lazy, a bad student (had a B-average. He never helped with school, but expected straight-As and took full credit for my achievements), said I was incapable of being able to live and make it on my own, how immature and stupid I was that I wouldn’t be able to function enough to rent a place, pay bills and go to school, and threatened to take the car they bought back from me if I still decided to go. He said (I kid you not), *”You won’t have a car, how are you going to get a job and get money?? Because I’m not giving you any money for school or anything, you’re not going. And if you find your way up there anyway, you will FAIL and I hope you FAIL. And you can’t come back here when you fail, don’t come back asking me to help you!”*
My entire family just sat there, nodding in agreement. I was stunned. I tried to defend myself, but was barked down by everyone as “disrespectful, ungrateful and rude” for wanting to jeopardize losing my car and my parents’ support at home over having the chance to grow. He cut me off from having contact with those relatives (this was the 90s, so no SM or other ways to call). To this day, they believe I’m the one who never wanted to keep in touch, and never respond to my attempts to reach out. Narcissist Dad already destroyed every relationship ahead of time to make sure I never had a chance.
What made things worse was being stuck, and seeing my neighbors’ daughters and friends graduate and go off to college, with their families’ full blessings and financial support. I’d see their parents talking to my dad after coming back from visiting them on campus, sharing how much they were so proud of their children and how happy they were for them. In my 40s now with my own family, but it still hurts to think about it sometimes 😢.
Did you ever go to college
Yeah tell us if you got to go to college . I'm so sorry about this
If you didn't get to go, it's never too late. I got my engineering degree in my thirties and make six figures. Don't let age stop you
This makes me so sad. I hope you were able to separate from them and that your life has been a happy one. You deserved so much better than this.
What the fuck is up with these parents hating on their own kids for doing better than what they could? Did either of your parents graduate college? Neither of mine did and I found out as an adult they hid a letter for me about getting accepting into a college. Just to make sure I didn’t succeed past them. Petty as fuck.
I had really bad cramps as a teenager and stayed home from school, it hurt so bad I didn't want to leave my bed or my bedroom and mostly slept for hours, my dad got upset that I didn't run to meet him when he called out for me, I was asleep, so he responded by flipping over the living room table and breaking the glass. My mom explained why I didn't come to him, mind you, he could have just as easily knocked on my door and checked on me. Also, he didn't need anything from me he just liked having me and my sibling run to him when he called.
I have so many stories, but I’d rather say to those who are still dealing with or healing from narcissistic parents that it’s not your fault. Be the person who breaks the cycle. If you were judged, choose understanding. If you were rejected, choose acceptance. If you were shamed, choose compassion. Become the person you needed when you were hurting, not the person who hurt you. Heal instead of becoming bitter so you can act from your heart.. not your pain.
Needed this, thank you ❤
This is such a beautiful comment. Thank you so much for putting this in the universe. ❤
This comment is healing in itself Thank you
Im not shocked/ surprised, honestly. There are a lot of ppl who have kids and wish they made different choices.
Yeah, that's not the issue here. The issue is that they're all most likely suffering from NPD and are walking around undiagnosed.
One day, when I was around 16, I decided that I wanted to go to college for elementary education. My narc father had other plans. He always insisted that I go into engineering. When I finally told him I wanted to be a teacher, you would have thought I had declared I wanted to start doing drugs and selling myself. We literally had a physical altercation over this. Needless to say, I moved out at 17, and he signed off on all financial responsibility for me. It really was a win/win.
He sucked, but I'm glad he signed the papers and let you go. The silver lining in a shit storm. My dad kept claiming me and just wouldn't give me his taxes to use for school. Them not being open to emancipation, even though I went to college a year early at 16/17, messed me up financially until I graduated college. I'm honestly surprised we graduated
My mom's weirdest tantrum was when she yelled and threatened to cut me off financially for PLANNING to change the foreign language that I would study during my freshman year of high school. 😑
My dad refused to eat dinner unless he was served: first, the biggest portion, and no veggies. If veggies were ever on the plate we had to remake the whole plate bc “be could taste the vegetable juice on the other food”
Sorry you went thru that, I think it's ridiculous that parents have their kids serve them, my parents were the same way. We also didn't get to spend a lot of time with them, they were always in their room. They use to have these days call "home days" and that's when we were allowed to chill with them in their room, they were always home just not around us, so the name doesn't make sense but it usually just consisted of us bringing them their food, my oldest sister rubbing my dad's feet for hours and us cleaning their room and closet 😂
😂😂😂
Is this an African parent?
My father also never touches vegetables he always says "I'm not eating grass cause I'm not a cow. While at the same time he used to scream hell of abuse on my mother that he got diabetes because of "her bad cooking" and that sheade him sick. Never the candies he ate in tones. As hes not a cow.
Two words: NURSING HOME.
Not even that. Just parent abandonment in their own homes.
Not even. I hope they got their 4th quarter affairs in order. Or whatever the state decides to do with em.
😭
lolol or if you're a Golden Girls fan "Shady Pines" 😉
19:46 Our parents and other elders got away with a lot of 💩because they extorted us to be quiet. This is pretty much why I went no contact with my whole family because as an adult even the eyewitnesses were gaslighting about whether or not anything ever happened. I’ve been estranged from my family for about 20 years and I don’t miss the reunions but I do miss that one auntie (RIP).
11:00 My heart goes out to her, my mom was like this too. And when my dad came home from work, she would make up stories about things we did. So then he would be upset with us for giving her grief, whole time she would be lying.
It’s interesting that several people here said their upbringing was the reason why they decided to not have children. That was definitely the main reason I didn’t have any. What kind of parent would I be if I never saw a good example of one?
Omg...I have a Narcissistic aunt (my moms sis). The stories I have from her unyielding hell! Decades of stories! I wish nothing but healing for those who encounter narcissists, psychopaths and sociopaths! 🙏🏾🙏🏾
It's basically a lifelong healing journey. The trauma is sooo deep. You end up questioning yourself, overthinking everything, being depressed/anxious, and not having the best relationships.
6:50 your dad punched you in the chest of course your friend is shocked to see a grown man punching a girl.
The demonic maternal carrier assigned to me punched me in the chest as well mind you I was teen that weighed about 115 wet and she was at least 300 pounds
Exactly.
This is INSANE. I got lucky with my parents because it never got to this point. That’s horrible and all of these people deserves to grow up better.
OMG! My mom would do the thing where she'd completely dump out my drawers and pull everything out of my closet. The gift thing was an issue as well. Very entitled and mean at times. Emotional and physical abuse from both parents. 😔
Could never do it to my boys. It's soul crushing
I bet all of these narc parents are also the same type of people who flex about being parents or say to people when they're losing an argument about kids/parenting "dO yOU eVEn HaVE kIDs?!". Yep.
After this last Thanksgiving I had enough. Was in the car w/ mom and dad, me and dad have been drinking mom is driving. It's a new car so she asks him where the parking brake is, he didn't hear her. I spoke up and asked again, he IMMEDIATELY flips out, everyone is a mother effer, we're trying to drive he's telling my mom she's driving erratically and starts swinging his body around, I tell him he needs to stop or he can find his own way home because he was going to have us in an accident. I'm a mother effer, he tries to jump out of a moving vehicle and honestly at this point who cares right....
Anyway my mom and I ended up at my uncle's house for the night and made him find his own way home. I'm done with that man and it looks like that decision cost me my mother too.
What happens when pick mes grow up? This .
I can’t really even remember what tantrums were about bc I dissociated so much.
Listening to the Lady @ 10:55 was like listening to someone recall my childhood. My mother expected perfection. The last tantrum was two years ago over a plant light. I severed ties over a year ago but, I still grieve. For years I excused her behavior due to her childhood trauma. But I realize that only enabled her behavior and abuse. 15:54 is all too common, they target and pick someone to unleash their rage on (pets are not excluded from this).
I was suicidal from age fourteen. I was so depressed and traumatized by things that had happened in my life, and the craziness of my family situation. I begged my parents to get me psychological help, but they refused. I staggered on for the next ten or so years, and made one relatively serious attempt at suicide. My life was an ongoing crisis because i was just so f*cked up. I couldn’t afford a therapist and for years I could not get a doctor to take me seriously enough to refer me to help. But FINALLY I got some help. My mother was deeply hurt, would not stop crying about how some stranger, who she would never meet, might think she was a bad mother. She fought against me getting help even though my life was a disaster. To this day, I think she would rather I had died, than that she might have to look at her own failings.
I have always said this to myself before and say it again: Not everyone is meant to be a parent nor should they even try. And being a childfree person, like myself, helps prevent you from being the monster you know you can wind up being. Getting to know yourself and who you are as a person is both terrifying but enlightening and also very much needed in the face of humanity (for all humans of all ages). Looking at this video makes me feel so sad and angry because I had parents, family members, just like the ones in this video and I'm glad I went no contact with them. I'm glad the victims of this ab*se have a voice.
Refusing to give my mother thousands of dollars because she overdrafted her account. Shes terrible with money. And the bonus was she was going on vacation where she was going to gamble. I later “divorced” her and the rest of my family because they were all a bunch of narcissists for other reasons. It was honestly like escaping a cult
I love how when you bring it up they always say 'That never happened.'
The random fits of rage mother was very relatable. My mother also became very violent and aggressive when our rooms were even a little untidy. She would do things like tip shelves over, knock things off from surfaces, etc. She blames it all on "being stressed" now, which isn't and excuse to be violent and aggressive to your own children
I said it once and I'll say it again. Some people's very first bullies and ops are their parents.
Yep my mother stayed in rage mode I had to literally turn numb and we argued every DAY
I don't believe my mom was a narcissist but looking back on her (sometimes) extreme anger towards us kids, I feel like she was extremely unhappy being a parent. That's why I am happy being able to have the choice to not have kids, bc I know I don't have the emotional bandwidth to care for them.
Exactly. I know for a fact that my mother’s treatment of me was a big part of me deciding to not have children. I felt like I had no idea how to be a good parent because I never had a good example of how to be one, and I certainly wasn’t going to mess up another generation.
@carmenlarose4072 I understand what you're saying. I've been around kids since the age of 8 (I have older siblings) and I always knew kids weren't for me. I love them but I also love it when they leave lol
My mom likes to talk major ish about her bf's daughters who are literally my friends and I told her to stop taking to me about them because I don't like hearing what she has to say about them, and she lost her dang mind begging me to have a conversation with her about why she ISN'T talking ish. I told her that what she says may be true, but the way she says it is straight up meangirl ish.
For example, the daughters still live with their father and depend on him...uh yeah- cause they're fresh outta highschool. Not the point, but the way she talked about that was "the older one doesn't pay for anything herself. she's still living off of daddy's money." Ummm? Cause he went to the store and she asked for a bag of chips? *I* depend on her and she doesn't talk about me like I'm a moocher. It's just such icky behavior and I don't wanna hear it.
She called me rude for not wanting to talk about it anymore. I literally don't need an explanation for what you're trying to say- just stop saying it to me. How are you gonna throw a fit because I don't wanna hear you talk about my friends who are your boyfriend's daughters. How are you gonna throw a fit because I don't want to have a conversation in general? ESPECIALLY ONE THAT DOESN'T MATTER OMG.
My dad also used to ask me if I had a problem if I didn't laugh at his jokes. Used to because I cut him off
Some of these parents sound like they have undiagnosed borderline disorder... Grew up with a parent with it and the tantrums and shifting moods are INSANE!
Sorry excuses for parents, I am so sorry you all went through this. My God these people had no business been parents. What the actual hell 😢😢
I’ve gone NC with both. I will not allow them to destroy my future. My future children deserve a healthy mother.
Weirdest tantrum my mom ever threw: she asked me to clean her fridge, which I did immediately. I wasted no time, not even a minute, I went straight to her fridge, cleaned it out, washed it down, and refilled it. She got so pissed and yelled at me literally two inches from my face, spit flying everywhere, about how I was a b**ch and stressing her out and to go f**k myself. This was last year. I lived with her temporarily because she's disabled and I went there to help her out. I work fulltime, was paying everything (mortgage, insurance, water/elec, internet) except her cigarettes, drove her to her doc appointments, took care of her 3 cats and large dog, did ALL the chores and laundry, did the shopping with my own car and gas, paid all the groceries by myself (this included food for me, her, and her boyfriend who is also disabled), and shovelled the snow all alone. I helped fix things around her house, and when her car had problems, I brought it to the garage myself and paid for it to be repaired. I even gave her money to help have her teeth fixed. Once that tantrum happened, I said NOPE and left a few months after cause it took a bit to find an affordable apartment. I went no contact and haven't spoken to her in a year. She didn't even text me on my birthday. She was terrible my whole life, and I tried SO HARD to have a good relationship with her but at 34 I realized it isn't possible.
I'm shocked at how many bad parents are out there. Lack of experience and unable to be humble themselves
I felt the first story. My Mother use to go off on us about not being rich like athletes and entertainers to retire her and give her money.
My narcissistic/abusive father died from brain cancer 2 years ago, and while I was staying at my parents' home, doing hospice care, my narcissistic mother told me I was stressing her out worse than my father was by dying, because I wanted to buy her a new dish rack.
That is so incredibly hurtful.
@@zilness yeah, that was when the blinders really started to come off. My father was so unpleasant, it was easy to think that he's the problem, and my mother is a victim. But he was, at least, really mentally ill and had suffered terrible abuse as a child. She's just a codependent pick-me who neglected her kids so she could spend forty years arguing with my dad, and always acts like nothing is her fault, or her responsibility. Once he was dead, I saw how she's kind of a monster, and worse than he was in a lot of ways. I haven't spoken to her in almost a year now, it's amazing how quickly you can heal, and how many repressed memories started coming up, once you are not under constant emotional attack.
I hope none of them is in your ife now
@@cosmicreef5858 thank you!! They're not, and it's great!!
The weirdest tantrums my mom would throw were always when I dropped something, or anything like that while she was in a different room.
My mom would literally throw something across the room she was in, to the extent that it startled me, and said, "see, I can throw things too!"
The first time it happened, I told her I dropped something.
Her reply:
"Oh".
As it kept happening though, I just stopped wasting my energy to open my mouth and give an explanation.
My mother would do this too! 😞
@@Jae-by3hf wow. I thought I was the only one who dealt with something so out of the ordinary.
My mom cut me out of family pictures and hung them back up on the wall when I went to visit my dad who she hated. I was 18 and not living in her house.
I'm so sorry that happened to you!! That was not okay at all!!
I Notice that a lot of people who aren't into spiritual Enlightenment or life and a people who are considered awake. What is a lot of these young people who are breaking generational curses? Cause the stuff that we are talking about narcissists. Devastating to people's lives. And it's like I applaud these young people speak it about this. I'm 44 years old and I'm just finding out what my mother was and how I was treated. I'm a survivor.
I have both a narcissistic, mom and dad, but I grew up with my mom since my dad married my mom’s sister. I have so many stories that I could tell.
A few years ago, my mom was living with my sister and my sister went to jail. She never asked to borrow any money, but got mad at me because I went to go get a tattoo done in Las Vegas. She took it out on me because how dare I do something for myself, a grown adult, when she’s struggling.
One time she blame me for my sister‘s car getting repossessed. She felt that it was my fault because I was trying to buy a house at the time and she stated that they found her car at my house because the process made my information public.
I started my response to a question he asked me with "well..." and he went off on my for 'talking to him crazy'
I belive his exact first words were "dont f*cking talking to me like that!"
Random morning.
I remember I asked for in the car in the 4th grade, happy and asked my mom how her day was. She literally said, “Shut the fuck up. I’m not talking to you. Clearly it wasn’t good”. She was always angry, btw. Nothing had to happen for her to be engaged. I’m sorry 😞
Omg these are awful. It hurts me to hear them. I literally crying right now. These stories were a lot even though the ppl telling them laugh I can only imagine how their hearts hurt. Such abuse.
This genuinely made me cry. I'm so sorry you all went through this. Wishing you all peace and healing.
See Destiny this is why i love your videos. You really think deeply about stuff and you are so open about your own struggles. Thank you!
I appreciate that. Thank you 🫶🫶🫶
Videos like this and seeing all the Comments make me feel I have a community. Because if you are alone as the scapegoat of the family with a narcissistic mother, you can feel crazy, like you’re the only one in the world going through things like this. Sending love to you all and thank you all for sharing pieces of your personal story. ❤💯
Videos like this and hearing the stories of my friends and co-workers over the years have shown me how blessed me and my sister were to be born to my parents. Some people are not meant to be parents and I am so grateful that mine were ready. ❤
My father went ballistic in a restaurant. Kicking chairs and screaming at me cause of cinnamonrolls. It was my first time making cinnamonrolls and i followed the recipe to the T. They came out gigantic like thensize of my hand. And he kept sayibg they're too big so i just said it's my first time and i just followed the recipe. Boom! "Don't ever make anymore fucking cinnamonrolls again! Bla bla bla"
Another time he went crazy cause my mom didn't remove the plastic that keeps cake slices from drying out in the fridge. I hate my dad
So sorry you went through this. He sounds like a child.
@@moea2040 thanks. I've gone no contact with him since my mom passed away. Protecting my peace
I was helping my mom, paying half the mortgage, 8k loan, helping with my brother, cooking and cleaning.
But i wasn't doing shit and she has no help
My father is extremely negative, pessimistic, and cynical. He is very stubborn and committed to his perspective and unwilling to make adjustments in his communication with me. The last straw was when I recently shared news of my FIRST pregnancy. I am 30 years old! He was very argumentative and unsupportive. I walked out and wrote a message that I don’t want him in my life anymore. I will never forgive him or welcome him into my life/family with my new baby.
Thanks for posting this
I just had my baby and I had post-partum depression. I was crying because I had no sleep, was hungry and overwhelmed. My mom looked at me with tears in her eyes and asked "why do you have an attitude with me?" I just look like 😳🤯and continued to cry....
My mom never liked it when I received any kind of attention. I'm talking from a young age too. She wanted to be the center of attention, especially when it came to men. My mom would always comment on how stupid I was, my clothes were too this or that (Jean and a t shirt y'all, she slut shamed me), she would rip up my art work. Yep. My senior year, I was asked by my Art teachers to apply for a full ride scholarship for Art. My mom was so mad, she took that paperwork, told me to follow her outside and proceeded to burn the application in our outside fire pit. She then burned any art I created or any art supply she could find of mine. She denied she ever did it to the day she died.
These parents will never remember the incidents, they will literally look at us dumbfounded, like we’re making it up. I can relate with Destiny, had to grow up fast, cook and clean. That’s why I will always be the best auntie or Titi or Zia, never the parent I’m all the way good.
My mom was psycho... once during school I missed the morning bus because it came and went early. I walked back home from the bus stop to tell her I missed the bus and she flipped her lid, calling me a useless r-slur. She drove me to school, which was perfect for her narcissistic raging because I was trapped in the car and had to listen to her screaming at me. She was speeding and driving erratically btw. Anyway, later that evening the school called to aplogize about the bus driver missing a bunch of students. And nope she didn't apologize
No tantrum like a narc tantrum!
One day when I was talking with my mom at the kitchen table. I told her wanted to get a Monroe piercing. My dad came in the kitchen during the conversation. He said a smart comment. After saying I didnt care about what he likes or doesnt like, my dad threw juice in my face.
GURLLLL!! This is triggering
I want braids like the girl who had the phone drama with her dad! So beautiful! Like dreads!
That first story hurt my heart bless that sister for going through that all because her mother was jealous over a gift 💝 why not buy it yaself make it make sense the kids still treated her she’s an ungrateful ass!
I recently found out my mother blamed me for my father s. abusing me. She says bc she taught me to speak up but the gag is I was too scared because I thought she wouldn’t believe me and would kick me out. You’re the drama, not me. I’ve stopped taking to her since. That’s probably not even the worst either of them have done to me.
My mom once came to my high school stage event.I was in charge of setting up the stage and it was a bunch of kids getting awards for various things and she turned to me and complained that "Why I wasn't getting awards like this? Or "why am I not applying myself?" These were awards for debate and math leagues. I did tennis after school 🎾 mine you she made me do a sport after school cuz she believed it would keep us out of trouble.....didn't work for my sister
@12:05 my jaw fell to the ground because my mom did this to me quite often. I think sometimes I would just come home and everything would be flipped the details are blurry I’ve forgotten it for years.
Got in trouble for washing my hair before doing my chores. Step mom was knocking on the door asking me what I was doing. I just wanted to use the bathroom before it smelled of cleaners.
All the stories were heartbreaking
One thing I've learned is that children of narcissists can adopt narcissistic traits but not have full blown NPD. If I remember correctly, we all exhibit narcissism to a degree bc of self preservation and such. However, it can turn into patterns, behaviors, or a personality disorder. We don't know what's exactly the reason or why yet, so there really isn't no telling when it progresses. That being said Ms Destiny she could've been narcissistic in how she dealt w/you but not a person w/NPD. Narcs wouldn't do that out of concern for their children bc their only concern is themselves sadly
And these older parents really are trying to figure out why their millennial children are putting them in nursing homes and not visiting them. 😵💫😵💫😵💫
Some people simply don't need kids
I have been writing in journals for a majority of my life, so a lot of the tantrum stories I have are documented in them. There are so many, especially from 2021, that I don’t even know what to share. One of the weirdest is when she called me while I was at a friend’s dorm celebrating the release of Red TV, to yell at me about how I messed up setting up the tables at my job for the event the next day. Mind you, I was setting them up after a birthday party as a favor for my skating club, I wasn’t even directed to do so by my boss. But I had to go at the end of my shift because I had plans, so I remember I just tried to set up the room as close to what was needed as I remembered, after a several hour long shift.
She said I “ruined so and so’s day” and that I had to “explain why I did it wrong.” She told me to apologize to them, and I did, thinking I really did ruin their day, but they just said “it’s ok”.
And that’s when I realized that, hey, she is the only one making me feel bad here. She said “too bad there’s nothing you can do to make this right” clearly expecting me to drop all of my plans to go fix my mistake. And then “is there anything else you have to say for yourself?” I have the nerve to say “nope, I think that’s it.” And go back to my plans. I was an adult, being spoken to like a child.
This may seem rather mild but it is a bold example of why I thought growing up that it’s acceptable for others to make mistakes, but not for me to. And I definitely did make mistakes, so it led to a loooooot of self hatred.
You seem much better now glad you feel better ❤
Yes I am better now. Thank you so much ❤️🫶🫶🫶
Not only was I being s. abused by my father he always would pick on me and one day after I got out of school I got a whooping bc my hair was misplaced after school bc my mom had just done it. I was maybe 6 or 7? My hair was already unhealthy and short thanks to my mom so there wasn’t much to work with plus a hot Texas day and recess was not my friend. So I got a whooping. That’s not even the worst of it. One time I got a meaningless whooping and my mom just sat in the bedroom and drank a beer. No consoling or anything. Let her tell it she was an incredible mother with zero issues. I don’t talk to her anymore and he has been in prison since 03
So sorry to hear… I hope you have a chance to find healing and peace somehow 🕊️
@@YabbaDabbaDooooo Thank you so much I am! That is a major reason I decided to go no contact. I couldn’t heal because she was still actively being a jerk and trying to manipulate me and my child. Thank you so much for your well wishes
That girl dad did not get her the phone she wanted PURPOSELY
A phone really entitled much she's just as dramatic as her father
I washed my clothes. I got yelled at for washing my own clothes when I was 19 years old.
I wasnt there for this one because i had already gone NC with my mother, but i heard from an older cousin that i still talk to that, when one of my little cousins (i believe she was in her early 20s) committed the big S, my mother appearantly went to a family meet(not sure what you would call it but when the family gets together after the event happens) and threw a fit because the leg on her walker was broken. It makes me glad i stay away. RIP to my baby cousin
My aunt(narcissist, con artist) gave me and my sibling money to get food. We also got a cheesecake. I gave her the change. She said, what happened. I showed her the food and the cheesecake. She screamed like someone was killing her. Me and my sibling starred. So we never ate. The food went bad. We didn't eat the $4 cheesecake either and it went bad too. The cops came by the townhomes. The neighbors called because they thought someone was being deleted. She got mad again because the neighbors that called were a different race. This same aunt lied to me in 7th grade about stealing my Nintendo and pawning it. She lied twice & said she gave it to the less fortunate. Then lied again said it melted in the back seat. I found a pawn shop receipt later. I think she stold my walkman too. She later got be up for cheating w/ the pastor. This lady still tried to stalk me on LinkedIn. She said, she is giving all her stuff to me. She is still broke at 70 yrs old. She has a daughter that won't talk to her. The aunt later went to prison for stealing from a church. 😂
She never took responsibility for what she did to me and was always the victim. 6 years no contact. My younger brother abused me physically when i was pregnant and my mother knew about it about instead she didn't check to find out if i and baby are okay nope instead this woman blamed me for arresting my younger brother for hitting me when i was pregnant and pushed me to the floor. Till today she still holds that grudge and my younger brother still holds that grudges of something that happened 6 years ago and never apologise or held him accountable. He became a narcissist like my narc mother. I love my peace now and dont regret cutting this people off for good because the older they got they worse they become. My younger brother has never held a job down and kept getting arrested for drugs or weapon possession and he dropped out of school age 16
I can’t do it nomore. Mines getting worse as she ages. Stoped talking to her for 3 years. I was going through a lot and she said she wanted to help but wants to infantilize , control me and tell me what to do. She throws tantrums like a child she won’t listen she talks over me broo. At least her mom trying to do better and she wants to change mine will not change she’s getting herself and I’m tired of it. I’m already down and she’s kicking me while I’m Down.
My ex just said something similar about not telling anyone about the dog repeatedly biting her! He refused to return her
Had his wife and kids shovel the snow so he can go see his girlfriend! 🤣
When my father used to pick us up my mom threw a tantrum because his gf braided our hair. He eventually ended up abandoning us
YOUR DAD!??
@@malachit3741 yup
I'm confused...your MOTHER was mad because her HUSBAND allowed another woman to be around THEIR children,and you find this traumatic?! WTF.
@@thespot2035WHERE DID YOU SEE MARRIAGE? HUSBAND? OR WIFE? anywhere in this comment?🤔
@@thespot2035 my parents were never married but still had children together. I never saw my parents in an actual relationship
It seems this narcisstic behaviours are human behaviour as opposed to it being racial. It’s really sad to hear this. I do hope we are better humans to people and our children.
Getting mad I went to see colleges with a counselor instead of her when she wouldn't take me.
I couldn't move out of state for college because my narc mom threatened to have me abducted and returned if I left her. She also made my friends talk to her for at least a half hour before she gave me the phone. Sometimes she would tell them I wasn't there at all. When I started dating someone who wouldn't entertain her and just ask for me, she tried to forbid me from seeing him.
My narc dad threw a tantrum because when i bought a house 3 years ago, it was bigger than his. It was also DISHEVELED! I could only afford it because it needs A LOT of work, but nooooooo, its bigger so now im "gaudy, selfish and narcissistic". They really do tell on themselves 🤦🏻♀️ i havent spoken to him since, changed my number and everything.
I live in New England and it get cold but heat is so expensive so I would watch the thermostat especially because I was the only one working, my able bodied mother only went to church and took money from me and yes we lived together. Anyways my nephew was like 9 months at the time and my mother had the stovetop on and it was a gas stove and my nephew was in his walker, I told my mom “why would this be on if the baby is rolling around, you can just turn the heat up” (anything for the babies of course) well she threw her cup full of juice at me and flipped over the table right around the baby and I wasn’t phased by it just because she is a terrible actress 🤣 we don’t live together anymore
The clothes out the drawer, I use to do to my daughters when they were young. I'd done it like three or four times. I did it because my mom used to do it to us. I thought that was right. Crazy. How I stopped is because I allowed my daughters to talk to me and express their feelings about it, and I realized that me doing this was really unnecessary and that all I had to do was communicate with them. So I stopped. Communicate with your children. Allow them to communicate with you
My mom smashed a 3 story Barbie house with her fists because I moved it 3 feet from its original spot.
She said, "That's not the way i had it!"