I was born with this. My mother drank alcohol and possibly used other substances whilst pregnant with me. I had a very difficult start and even died several times at birth. I was put into care and was adopted at 3 months. My adoptive parents were told that I would be mentally and physically disabled and that they were taking on a lot. They stuck by me and gave me a loving and supporting home. I was very hyperactive, impulsive and destructive for quite some time. I was however very creative and this is what I excelled in. I went on to do a design degree and eventually start my own business. I’m 50 now and have had problems with substances myself over the years but I’m happily sober now and I am feeling positive about the future. I feel very lucky that I had the right support early on and was able the reach my best potential.
Thank you so much for sharing your story, James. It helps me immensely in learning how to interact with the homeless teenager I have befriended. What a wonderful success story you are!
Thank you for sharing James. I work with adolescent FASD kids in crisis and I just hope to get them through one day at a time. I’m grateful for the insight you have shared and the success that you have achieved. It helps me to know that it is worth continuing to fight for these kids. I hope you continue to have growth and accomplishment in life. I will carry your message with me as I go back everyday to work with these kids!
My, mother did this to my little brother Damon, and refuse to acknowledge that there was anything wrong with him,poor Damon. He died young ,,Miss him still.
@@voluntarism335 I am part of the pro-choice crowd who is actively working with folks who need help with addiction, mental illness, and access to healthcare services to prevent just this. You would be surprised how many people need help and cannot get it and are dehumanized by society as a whole.
Having raised 2 grandsons with fetal alcohol effects, I identified with this video very much. The scrutiny suffered by me is immeasurable. We need more videos like this.
I have fetal alcohol syndrome and I was taken away from my biological parents as well. But I don't let it bother me I've over come it . I've taught myself how to live in my life. I live by myself I do everything by myself for over 10 years. And I got married and I live a happy life. Disabilities do not dictate your life you can overcome them and you can live a happy life. I'm proof of that I have fetal alcohol syndrome and I live a normal life. Am 45 years old.
Ya, Ive been in the University of WA study since i was young. Im high functioning & dont really show the effects. Alot of people in the medical profession dont take it seriously or know anything about it. Ive got 2 degrees, 2 kids & hold a steady job. Thing is, I have to adjust so much to act 'normal'.
I have fetal alcohol syndrome myself. I've been with the University of Washington study for most of my life. I have two degrees, two kids and look relatively normal. Thing is, I have to adjust a lot to act normal. I have had doctors and others dismiss or not believe me when I tell them.
I have you beat I am 63 with fetal alcohol an yes like you said you can survive with this problem. However it is not easy and people who can not see this invisible fas do not give us a break so Jobs are hard to contend with yes we can do the same thing over and over again no problem but it takes longer for us to learn new things and people are not very patient. I believe they should offer more assistance to us and I think women who drink while pregnant should be punished jail time would be okay with me it would cut down on a totally preventable problem. So I guess I am not as nice as you are about it. Personally I think we all deserved to be born normal just like my mother was she got to be born normal so why didn't I and yes they should pay. I am the same as you I own my own home and I lived alone even helped my brother sisters, but I resent what was done to me because I would have liked to have been smart like my daughter I would not even drink coffee, so how dare my mother.
These adoptive parents are saints. I know I have zero patience for kids with behavioral problems. And, I agree he shouldn't be left with an animal unsupervised.
It's sad you're so selfish. Please don't reproduce. As if these kids can help how they are. Thank God these families know what true love REALLY IS. That clearly can't be sad about everyone.
@Beth Meyers Hi Beth - you are right on one hand - the parents should watch the boy's interaction with the animals carefully !! On the other hand it is wonderful and healing to have animals around - for every child - for children having a disease/disorder it is very important , it eases their life and feelings a little bit and sometimes much !! 😉 I think children should grow up together with animals when even possible . I grew up on a farm with my grandma and many many different kinds of animals . When my children were small, we always had a little zoo , finally one cat was left . 🐱 Since that time I have one cat only here , the last 2 are from a cat rescue ... 😼 Lots of love from a German grandmother !!! 🌻
@Carrie nunya who are you to decide what someone should or should not be able to handle? People on the internet are so horrible and you CARRIE are one of them.
This is incredible, we are currently fostering my husband's nephews and one doctor has given us an unofficial diagnosis of ADHD, but his therapist has given him an unofficial diagnosis of FASDs. His mother (my sister in law) drank HARD and smoked marijuana and I am convinced he has fasd. He is 8, but mentally is about 6 and is so much like these kids. All we want is a diagnosis, so we can find the best way to support him and we can learn how to deal with his behaviour in a positive way. After seeing this video I am convinced he has it.
That boys parents love him so much. I'm so glad he was able to be adopted by such a good hearted family who has the means to properly care for him and give him the understanding and effort he deserves
My husband and I raised a child whose mother abused alcohol and drugs while pregnant. He had many behavioral issues . He was very impulsive even violent at times. He suffered from night terrors when he was small. He never thought about consequences. He was very impulsive. He was easily led by others in his peer group. He got into drugs and alcohol and when high he jumped off a bridge. He did not survive and died at age 19. We very much felt the pressure from others who didn’t understand his problems. They felt we were just bad parents. We grieve for him still and wish he could have had a fulfilling life. We loved him very much and wish we could have somehow done more.
How wonderful you were to love and care for him. One never fully recovers from the death of a child. My heart breaks for you. From one grieving mother to another.....
Maureen I’m so sorry for your loss. I work with adolescent FASD kids in their highest periods of crisis. They are some of the toughest kids that come through the doors. They are everything you described in your grandchild- impulsive, behavior issues, etc. It is a 24/7/365 job to raise these kids. They don’t sleep well, they never slow down, they react to the slightest stimulus, and their reactions are extreme. You did not fail. You gave safety and 19 years; our system that allows this harm to innocent babies has failed. I hope your heart has found some peace.
My aunt Wendy has fetal alcohol syndrome. She's almost 50 and still lives with my grandparents. She's very high functioning though... she's been a kitchen manager at UCD in Davis CA for like, 10 years, and has worked there for close to 20. She'll never be capable of living alone though. Her mental state is that of a 12-14 year old girl. She's super rad though, I love her. It's crazy that this is the first doc that's popped up on this subject, for me. I'm an obsessive doc watcher, and it never occurred to me how few vids there are on this paticular subject.
MrKevMan That’s not true. Even though working in a kitchen can be really demanding, it is regimented in a way that someone with certain disabilities could thrive, yet living on their own would be too overwhelming.
You only get ONE chance to grow a baby. For Pete's sake, lay off the spirits during pregnancy. These children are precious. What a shame they will be affected by this forever. Thank goodness this little boy (Jayden) is now in an environment in which his brain receives rich stimulation (sibling interaction, access to animals on his farm, building with Legos, etc.) and his soul receives love and care. Despite his personal obstacles, there's hope there.
@@DD-nd3fh oh get off of your abortion soapbox, you have absolutely no idea whether this mom was forced to give birth which is a stupid expressionist anyway. You are assuming something based on your own philosophy and agenda
These heroic parents adopt a child with serious disabilities and they then get looked down on poor parents for their behavior problems. That's just deeply sad.
@@polydactilism I agree with you ! The thing is. : out in public it is hard to differ a child having a mental disability from a bad behaving child just showing up a temper tantrum for a stranger . Maybe these wonderful parents should offer little cards to the strangers pointing at them etc , where it is written a little information about this disorder or any other disability ... Could this be helpful ???!!
@@dorisdaumann5914 I think that would be alot of extra work expected from the parents to hand out pamphlets, but to each their own. People with the privilege of time could take that on instead. Good activism is what will ultimately re-shape the belief systems that underlie people's reactions/empathies
My father has FASD, his mother also drank while she breastfed him. He was born in the late 1950s, so the affects of alcohol on fetuses weren't well known. He's had several diagnoses including ADHD and bipolar. I used to hate him for his temper and childish behavior, I try not to now. I know that he could not help most of his behavior. If there is anyone here who has a parent with FASD, know that you are not alone.
I'm 25 years old and I suffer with FASD and I have ADD and I take medication for it. But as I grew up with this I am normal but I have my days were my brain acts younger then I am, and I have random break outs or temper tantrums, I have a mild effect of FASD and I need help in a lot of things. But I have problems asking for help, and I need to stay stimulated on certain things. But I mean all in all we all want to be treated like a normal person. ❤️ So we need a lot of patience ☺️ and you have to explain things thoroughly so that our brain and mind can function in time to understand what your telling us, along with big words you gotta break it all down, and with FASD sometimes we cant control our feelings either or deal with stress, so we have freak outs because we don't understand. So you gotta be patient with us .
You are normal person. You happen to have a disorder like anyone else with a chemical lmbalance. I applaud your attitude. I was adopted and have struggled with anxiety disorder my whole life. I've heard thru the grapevine my bio mother drank while pregnant with me. I'm now 52 and after a lifetime of struggling I've finally come to love myself and my life. A large part of what bothered me was knowing she didn't want me and thought nothing of my well being while pregnant with me. It took a long time for me to come to terms with my origins. I'm at peace with myself now.
I have ADHD I was born in 72 when diet pills were the big thing the dr didn't know it would have an effect on me but it did I had a good mother but I have a predisposition to get paranoid if I'm worried I was put on disability when I was 23 I cry easy and can't handle stress and I have trouble learning I wish the drs had of studied this in fetal development my mom would have never took it I had a loving patient and understanding mom it wasn't her fault
Lisa Lentile I’m sorry for your situation, Lisa. My mothers mother took diet pills and it caused her death and perhaps contributed to mental illness in her children though they all have had high IQs. I hope despite struggles that you’ve found or will find happiness and health. Good luck to you ❤️
We adopted a child 35 years ago with FAS. Life was very hard since not that much was known at that time. I was very aggressive in getting her the help she needed. It is sad that they get judged for what their mom did to them. She has a husband and a perfectly normal 11 year old girl. Life is still challenging but there is hope for a good life for them. God bless all the fragile children🙏❤️
Gosh, I really feel for Katherine when she says she has few friends and how people have been so cruel to her with words... Katherine, on the off chance you would be reading this comment right now, I justwant to say to you that you are a wonderfully valuable soul and anyone would be extremely lucky to call you a friend, so before anyone is so quick to judge you on having a condition that you cannot help having, let's all look at negative traits that those who have so horribly judged you happen to possess: judgement, intolerance and lack of empathy... meanwhile you strike me as a gentle soul and a great heart. You have a lot of reason to hold your head high and be very proud of yourself xx
Lizzy And Baby she brought this on herself. There's no excuse for drinking while pregnant. There's adequate information out there now that there's no excuse. I have no sympathy for her as she was so willfully ignorant and didn't care for her child's future.
Anyone who adopts are great great people but ones who adopt and take in children who have special needs are super hero’s in my eyes!! Every child deserves a loving family and to see how far these children have come with these loving nurturing homes is awesome. To think where they might be if they weren’t taken in by people who dedicate the time and love no matter what obstacles and difficulties might be in the way is so special.
Fun fact: if a mother DOESN'T admit to drinking while pregnant, you actually CAN'T get officially diagnosed with FASD, even if you have all the other symptoms. They can only say "suspected FASD" until there's admittance by the parent or confirmation from another reliable source saying that they for sure drank.
Kristie Anderson If you don't have the hallmark FASD facial features (like a lot of space between your nose and mouth), then you probably do have ADHD, not FASD.
there are symptoms that are characteristic of ADHD and not FASD. it is a lot more complex than just saying someone is hyperactive and impulsive. People with FASD almost always have learning disabilities while people with ADHD may have trouble with school but do not technically have learning disabilities. there is more but that is basic differences
This boy is very intelligent...he runs, jumps and navigates, cares for his family, in his own special way...he is actually recovering from a brain injury and doing well, It is only when he is highly frustrated, tired or as a feeling of not being heard, he may self harm or harm other. And due to the fact he is in an amazing environment!!...as he grows so will some neural path ways and he will blossom to be the best he can be! Thanks for sharing.
I wouldn't downplay his condition and be patronising by calling him "very intelligent". He has FAS, he has brain damage, it affects him and his family's life a great deal. He's doing really well, but he's not very intelligent. That's patently untrue.
Why a glass coffee table in the middle of his (evidently) play place where he jumps and twirls from the furniture? That looks like a serious accident waiting to happen!
i am a individual with fasd and i have live both these kids stories this one really hurt for me to watch. but we can be stronger than what people labelize us we will rise above!!!
Attitude I definitely did! My stepsons have some issues that have yet been diagnosed but their biological mother admitted to doing cocaine and heroin while pregnant with both. My boys are incredibly lucky as even at their young age it looks as though they'll be able to live independently successfully. My heart goes out to these kids and their parents. So much strength and love! ❤
I have a cousin with FASD. We weren’t told what it was she had until we were adults. Our parents hadn’t even been privy to what it was that she had. The current process for prenatal genetic counseling, and testing has brought family history into the light. We had to ask what it was in the case that it was hereditary. Now that I know what it is, it is super obvious to see. Her social awkwardness, the tall tales, facial features, bodily features, are all on point. She is such a lovely woman, and great to talk to. Ultra reassuring, and a pretty great listener when it comes to things of the heart. She is on what I would estimate to be the cognitive, and emotional level of a preteen. When her mother was pregnant she didn’t know that it was dangerous to consume alcohol. Supposedly she only drank a few beers in the evening, and it still resulted in a pretty serious case of FAS. I feel like it has taught my entire family a great deal about patience, and finding the wonderful in people. To love them for all that they can do, not being frustrated for what they cannot.
I adopted my daughter who has FAS. I have had a child worker on McGuire AFB in NJ completely ignore me because I went to their organization for help because she is disabled. And the woman acted REALLY ANGRY toward me and refused to help me for like 30 minutes. She thought I was the birth mother. When she discovered I was the adoptive mother, her attitude went from angry and short to incredibly "sweet" and nice and helpful. I eventually confronted her on that and she denied it. I told her that that definitely occurred. Regardless of her pretending it did not. It was super obvious. I feel so bad for the birth moms because of workers like that.
Maxie Wallace Apparently, she’s 3 comments above yours.(Katherine Law) she said she’s nothing like the boy in the video, she’s very gentle and caring now and has short hair 😀 (she’s wearing shades in prof pic)
LEEGGGOOOOOSSSSSS!!! I know that feeling well. Diagnosed Asperger Syndrome and ADHD, the stimulation, sound touch sight(and sometimes taste😣) is the beeesssst. Thanks for sharing your stories!
I have watched almost all of these stories on this channel and this one really broke my heart These pour children. I really do feel for Katherine, I was bullied as well so I know how bad it hurts. I just want to give her a hug and tell her how wonderful of a person she and that she is worth something. She seems to be so happy in her new home and I think it's absolutly amazing she flourishing. I believe there should be so much more help for the people who are suffering from any kind of issue. A person's life is worth something and they need to be allowed to grow and learn l, no matter what they suffer from. No one should be brushed off to the side to rot. Great story! Keep up the great work.
@@katherinelaw6408 Hi Dear Katherine - do you still live in that apartment you showed us in this video ?? It is so totally clean - you are a wonderful housewife 🌷😉 !! You are a very nice good hearted person indeed !! Let me send you a hug. - and a lot of love - from a German grandmother !!! 💚
Whenever I’m out and I see children acting out I try and never feel annoyed or judge bc you never know what the child is dealing with and def don’t know or understand what the parent is going through on a daily basis.
I really hope his parents keep a really, really close eye on those kittens. He looked like he was being kinda rough with them and it can cause the kittens to fear him or other people as they grow up. the kittens need to be raised properly just like children.
his parents keep a very close eye on him and they wouldn’t let him near the cats if they didn’t trust him to not hurt them, as they’ve taken things away from him before when he had tantrums. kittens are surprisingly resilient and you can’t really see how he treats the cats all the time from a short clip
I was thinking the same thing. His parents should really teach him not to be so rough with an animal. He has to learn to respect animals as well as people.
Joc Joc I work with fostering and rescuing cats and you’d be surprised how many people don’t know how to treat animals. Many animals are returned because kids hurt the animal and the parents are upset when the animal retaliates in defence. People need to learn to respect them and their space, they are not toys.
I empathize with Jaden's situation. But having pets in a home where the child has no impulse control and has episodes of agression is totally inappropriate.
@@DreamOfGenie I agree. I worked for an animal rescue organization and so many dear animals were returned for these reasons. Not every home is right for a pet. In this case I really worry about those cats, as he is not capable of any kind of self regulation.
This video helped my friend diagnose her child. It was all ADHD and the Only diagnosis my friend had been given. She was against medication and because of the limited diagnosis, she sought no therapy. When I saw this video it was like watching my child’s friend in real life, recorded. She’s an amazing Mom. Her world revolves around him. Thank you for this video. I believe thousand will have a Eureka moment.
Everyone commenting about the cats when these poor people are suffering a disability through no fault of their own! The cats are fine, the boy is the one born from addiction and abuse and he deserves your sympathy. All these adoptive parents are absolute saints.
Mugwort animals can actually be wonderfully therapeutic for people with neuro disorders. he should be instructed in how to handle them, but I think having them could be really beneficial to him.
My mom who raised me has this and we are hanging on my a thread in our relationship. I told a close friend “trying with my mom feels like climbing a rock wall where every surface is covered in glass” I feel so alone. I only want to share this in case anyone else here is in a similar situation so that maybe they don’t have to feel alone too.
Is the family in danger when Jayden is bigger and stronger? I admire the parents for their love and commitment, I hope there is never a circumstance where someone gets seriously hurt.
While I feel this is the most wonderful couple and such a blessing that this kind of selfless and patient people exist....I do feel very sad and sorry for the other children in the family. They will never have a normal family life, get relatively little attention since most of the parents time and energy goes to this 1 child. That’s obviously just my opinion🤷🏼♀️
You're very correct. I adopted 2 children from foster care and one is un-diagnosed but I feel very certain he has this and this is exactly right. No one else in the family's needs get met because he's so demanding of everyone's attention. Going out is a nightmare and people don't understand. It's taken a lot of me to not dissolve my adoption. I know it's not his fault but it's more than I signed up for and way more than I can handle since I already have a special needs biological child of my own.
There's a boy in my town, well not a boy he's like 25 but his birth mom drank very very heavily while pregnant and then left so his grandparents adopted him and he finished high school and even has a job and even though it's noticeable just by looking at him that he has it he is still smart and respectful to everyone and as sad as it is that it happened he still seems happy because loving people adopted him and gave him a great life and the people that adopt kids in general but especially with disabilities are true heroes
my husband has fetal al. disorder....he is legally blind (born 1953), he's really very intelligent. He does not make decisions dealing with time very well, and he loves walking. It's really his vision that's the problem. Born about 1 lb. and a few oz. his mother had him after 7 mo. gestation.
meow Kittens are not china dolls. They were not hurt. He needs to be around the unconditional love that animals provide. He didn't hit them or kick at them or throw them. Yes, he was pretty exuberant and excited and picked them up but cats are flexible so they weren't being hurt. Its only our perception and humanize it. They aren't infant children. This little boy will grow up and have a special bond with animals. Animals can sense these things and will do a lot to help and they will have an amazing bond. But micro analyzing everything leads to increased stigma and judgement. The same could be said of any interaction and we know what happens to kids that have limited interactions with other living beings.
meow and a kid with disabilities doesn't... oh poor cat that was being played with where it was beimg annoyed if anythimg by a really hyper kid. poor abused cat!
I am Katherine but my hair is short now. I have FASD but I am gentle and kind. People who know me say I have the softest and most gentle hands in the world. I am not bad behaved or violent like the boy on this video. It's hurts that people think that every person with FASD is violent and has bad behaviour problems
is it rude of me to ask what name you've chosen to adopt as you enter this next chapter of your life, since your bio says something about your gender being different than you & your parents used to think it was? I'm sorry. I'm a 20 year old trans girl (I don't feel mature enough to adopt the term "woman" for myself, and I was assigned male at birth) named Ellenor and I have autism, which makes me inappropriately curious.
FASD can be misdiagnosed as ADHD. This happened to our child that we adopted. We found out from the birth mom herself that she drank alcohol and did meth during the pregnancy. Once CPS found out, it seemed like they didn't want our child to receive the diagnosis. We learned from others that it would be harder to rehome our kiddo if they had to, because now he's considered special needs - but we were blessed to be able to adopt him ourselves.
I am a 40 year old woman living with FAS. Growing up I had educational delays, mental illness, extreme outbursts of anger over nothing really. I consider myself lucky though because if FAS was a whole iceberg then as far as symptoms go I've only got the tip of it. When I say educational delays that's literally what I mean. I'm just as smart if not smarter than a lot of people, but the way I learn and memorize things is so convoluted I was considered impossible to teach. As an adult I still deal with the issues that come with FAS. In the form of rather severe treatment resistant depression and anxiety. I am socially stunted, I can not hold a conversation because I have never mastered the art of small talk, and groups of more than 10 people scare the living daylights out of me. Unfortunately my Mothers choice to drink through my pregnancy left me just disabled enough not to be able to function in a normal adult world, but smart enough to know what's wrong with me and be even more depressed about it. I will be on SSI and living at 90% below the poverty level my entire life unfortunately. All because of FAS and really bad stress reactions caused by the symptoms of it.
The real kicker comes in when you stop to think I've got 2 children. An 11 year old son and 7 year old daughter. They are in my care. Both born free of drugs and alcohol. However they've both got FAS symptoms. I don't know if the alcohol I got while in utero did something to my genetics or what but both my kids have been diagnosed with ADHD, and my son is on the Autism Spectrum. He's verbal and very high functioning, but he STEMS a lot. He's a toe walker and a hand flapper big time. When he's really stressed he has this high pitched whining noise he can make for an hour straight without taking a breath too. It's awful...like feedback from putting a microphone too close to a speaker.
Your kids don't have fetal alcohol syndrome then. They have gotten diagnosed wrong. Respectfully. I have it and read up on it and the only way you can get it is if the mom drinks. It's not genetic or hereditary.
My cousin adopted two kids, siblings. They were only told the girl, who was 5 at the time that she had ADHD. They found out this year, what many of us close to the family already suspected, that she does has FASD. She’s just turned 20, can’t pass school (college, trade school...), has no ability to focus for 5min, can’t hold a job. Her parents are in huge denial and keep encouraging her to try programs at school that she cannot possibly get through let alone get a job in later! She’s also been diagnosed with depression, and other psychological problems. It’s sad really bc they may have been more apt to help her better had the truth come out when she was still a child.
When my parents adopted my brother they were told some drugs and alcohol may have been consumed while he was in utero. He seems to exhibit some of the symptoms displayed in this video. But it is a spectrum. He lives and functions on his own. Though not particular well. Unlike the first boy in the vid. He is completely unviolent . He recoils when exposed to it. I’d say he stoped maturing somwhere between 13-17, mentally. Though at times seems perfectly at par with his age. Though not mostly. I often wonder if my parents had to deal with others judging them by his actions. I’d like to think not as we lived in a small rural community. And all would have been aware that he was adopted. We all love him and try to help him. But we can only do so much. He must be his own person. However many mistakes he makes we wish he would learn from, but never does.
God bless this family for having so much patience. I can't even imagine how difficult a child like this would be. I know that I wouldn't be able to do it.
God bless this beautiful family not only did they adopt a child in need which most couples would not dare take on a child with a disability they seem to be very patient and loving family I wish you all are very long a beautiful life together.
It is so sad that the parents get blamed for poor parenting, rather than realizing the child has a medical condition. My sister has autism, depression & anxiety & her problems get blamed on poor parenting or a bad family life, it is so frustrating when the medical professionals won't listen to the family.
I would remove the glass table top from the room where the couch's are. If he were to jump and fall onto the glass it could possibly cut him deeply and or kill him
Maybe the keep the glass table top, right where he plays, and gets all crazy and jumps off the couches - so that one day, hopefully, we WILL end it all! That's what I'd do!!!!
I agree! I wish I could include a picture. I feel onto a table as a child and almost died.The scar is so thick and deep and wrap around my thigh.About one inch wide from my knee up.
I'm very curious how they can medically differenciate fetal alcohol syndrome from ADHD? It makes me wonder how many ADHD diagnosed children actually have fetal alcohol syndrome...with the shame attached I'm sure many mothers wouldn't admit to drinking during pregnancy. These parents are amazing. Providing a stable loving home for a child with this condition cannot be easy. He's a lucky little lad to have found a home there xx
Im legal guardian for my Granddaughter who has FASD AND AUTISM, We went shopping when she was much younger, about 4/5 and she was quite a handful as it was over stimulating for her which she had trouble handling. One elderly man said to his wife loudly for me to to hear “look at it! If it was a dog u wouldn’t walk it on a lead!” I won’t say what I said to him but let’s just say everyone heard it🤬
I have various problems, a neonatal heart condition, severe Depression (for as long as my life/60 years now), constant anxiety and some anxiety attacks, poor focus, learning issues (math, memory, foreign language comprehension)frequently in a nervous energy state, some slight facial ( the small and smooth structure of the upper lips) anomalies and more issues which I believe are due to FASD. About 10 years ago my Mother finally admitted (after previously denying for decades) that she drank during the pregnancy. My Dad had told me decades ago that she drank frequently (straight whiskey and other hard liquor) during 1960 ( my gestation period of time) and also my sole sibling (in 1963). Prior to the marriage she had obtained a Juris Doctorate (Law) degree and a Masters in Social Work specialized in Medical/Pediatric Social Work, therefore she was not ignorant and uneducated, this she had a serious alcohol dependency. There is not much recognition, research, services, support and understanding of the people on the lower end of the FASD, such as myself. We "fall through the cracks" so to speak! I have to help myself.
❤️. He likes to jump and jump off of heights…I love that~maybe gymnastics, diving/swimming would make his brain happy? His sisters are so sweet. Same with his parents. Very lovely family. He won’t be able to sit still with that energy surging in his system…try sitting him on a huge yoga ball and give him scheduled breaks with rewards each time he manages his own breaks without disrupting the class. He reminds me of myself so so much…I couldn’t sit still and I had very similar impulse control issues and it was very challenging. I just get him so much. Sending love. You guys are fantastic and you are going to give everyone affected, the best lives and I have so much love and respect for all of you. To the kids-you are fantastic! You each have exceptional, unique qualities and I just know you are going to have wonderful lives!
I know a beautiful young lady in her early 2os. I now know. What she and her teen brother suffer from. I am friends/family with her mom. She never said what was wrong . but now I know. They all live at home. My beautiful girl is a "Katherine". Now I totally understand her. Known her since she was 5 years old.
He has a lot of energy he should be in sports. Tennis, horseback riding, may calm and finding ways to calm him and exhaust his energy and keep his mind busy. Hes adorable.
He seems very smart and so cute!! He’s very active and seem he gets bored quick lol... His family is very gentle and kind with him. Also got nervous with that glass table there he could get hurt if he hit it or jumped on it!! He is blessed to have a loving family
people often act like fasd is caused by frivolous women drinking while pregnant apathetically or maliciously, but it’s not. they’re addicted to alcohol, and it’s not like an addiction can go on pause for nine months. obviously they aren’t in a place to raise their kid themselves (at least not right away) but that’s why charging people criminally, as i’ve seen suggested, wouldn’t prevent this.
I was diagnosed with FASD and some of the symptoms hit me home. Thanks Attitude for highlighting this kaupapa, it might be a taboo Subject but this koorero needs to be highlighted
Wow, that family is incredibly strong and brave. The FASD boy is quite literally emotionally draining some of them... it's hard to even watch. Best of luck and hopefully the meds can help the boy into the unforeseeable future.
My adolescent and teen years were spent in foster homes. Most of the children were there because of substance abuse. Not all foster parents treat their foster children this well. It's understandable to correct them when they do something that could hurt themselves or others. But, my foster parent was very controlling, mentally abusive, emotionally abusive and corrected my foster brother, when he did annoying things. His room was like a prison sell. He was always getting punished for something. He would be punished for those quirky behaviors. It can be a challenge for those living around them, but I know the difference between abusive parenting, verses parents struggling to figure out how to raise their child. It really was an unfortunate experience.
I was born with this. My mother drank alcohol and possibly used other substances whilst pregnant with me. I had a very difficult start and even died several times at birth. I was put into care and was adopted at 3 months. My adoptive parents were told that I would be mentally and physically disabled and that they were taking on a lot. They stuck by me and gave me a loving and supporting home. I was very hyperactive, impulsive and destructive for quite some time. I was however very creative and this is what I excelled in. I went on to do a design degree and eventually start my own business. I’m 50 now and have had problems with substances myself over the years but I’m happily sober now and I am feeling positive about the future. I feel very lucky that I had the right support early on and was able the reach my best potential.
Thank you so much for sharing your story, James. It helps me immensely in learning how to interact with the homeless teenager I have befriended. What a wonderful success story you are!
So so glad you’re doing better
Thank you for sharing James. I work with adolescent FASD kids in crisis and I just hope to get them through one day at a time. I’m grateful for the insight you have shared and the success that you have achieved. It helps me to know that it is worth continuing to fight for these kids. I hope you continue to have growth and accomplishment in life.
I will carry your message with me as I go back everyday to work with these kids!
Do you feel that your own substance abuse is tied in with your mum's? Either through genetic inheritance or direct response.
Well done on your sobriety
100% preventable, unlike other neurodevelopmental disorders. That's the most horrible thing.
Alcoholism is a disease; you should feel just as sorry for the person who is suffering from it, not just the after math of what it can do.
Saraj E. Stephenson drinking is a choice
Yeah true, but it's still preventable by simply not drinking when you are pregnant. You can also (mostly) recover from alcoholism. Not so with FASD.
Saraj E. Stephenson oh man are you wrong
Torchy Brown a disease you go to rehab for
Breaks my heart that anyone could sentence a child to such a difficult life when it’s 100% avoidable
they do it because the prochoice crowd dehumanize babies in wombs
We take kids away from heroine addicts yet let alcoholics keep theirs
My, mother did this to my little brother Damon, and refuse to acknowledge that there was anything wrong with him,poor Damon. He died young ,,Miss him still.
They do it because some people are ignorant of the risks, some people are mentally ill, some people are addicted and cannot make good choices.
@@voluntarism335 I am part of the pro-choice crowd who is actively working with folks who need help with addiction, mental illness, and access to healthcare services to prevent just this. You would be surprised how many people need help and cannot get it and are dehumanized by society as a whole.
Having raised 2 grandsons with fetal alcohol effects, I identified with this video very much. The scrutiny suffered by me is immeasurable. We need more videos like this.
I have fetal alcohol syndrome and I was taken away from my biological parents as well. But I don't let it bother me I've over come it . I've taught myself how to live in my life. I live by myself I do everything by myself for over 10 years. And I got married and I live a happy life. Disabilities do not dictate your life you can overcome them and you can live a happy life. I'm proof of that I have fetal alcohol syndrome and I live a normal life. Am 45 years old.
Ya, Ive been in the University of WA study since i was young. Im high functioning & dont really show the effects. Alot of people in the medical profession dont take it seriously or know anything about it. Ive got 2 degrees, 2 kids & hold a steady job. Thing is, I have to adjust so much to act 'normal'.
I have fetal alcohol syndrome myself. I've been with the University of Washington study for most of my life. I have two degrees, two kids and look relatively normal. Thing is, I have to adjust a lot to act normal. I have had doctors and others dismiss or not believe me when I tell them.
How do you even know?
@@51lisasmithwhat do you mean?
I have you beat I am 63 with fetal alcohol an yes like you said you can survive with this problem. However it is not easy and people who can not see this invisible fas do not give us a break so Jobs are hard to contend with yes we can do the same thing over and over again no problem but it takes longer for us to learn new things and people are not very patient. I believe they should offer more assistance to us and I think women who drink while pregnant should be punished jail time would be okay with me it would cut down on a totally preventable problem. So I guess I am not as nice as you are about it. Personally I think we all deserved to be born normal just like my mother was she got to be born normal so why didn't I and yes they should pay. I am the same as you I own my own home and I lived alone even helped my brother sisters, but I resent what was done to me because I would have liked to have been smart like my daughter I would not even drink coffee, so how dare my mother.
These adoptive parents are saints. I know I have zero patience for kids with behavioral problems. And, I agree he shouldn't be left with an animal unsupervised.
And yes these parents are wonderful and kind people. This family are truely exceptional.
It's sad you're so selfish. Please don't reproduce. As if these kids can help how they are.
Thank God these families know what true love REALLY IS. That clearly can't be sad about everyone.
@Beth Meyers Hi Beth - you are right on one hand - the parents should watch the boy's interaction with the animals carefully !! On the other hand it is wonderful and healing to have animals around - for every child - for children having a disease/disorder it is very important , it eases their life and feelings a little bit and sometimes much !! 😉 I think children should grow up together with animals when even possible . I grew up on a farm with my grandma and many many different kinds of animals . When my children were small, we always had a little zoo , finally one cat was left . 🐱 Since that time I have one cat only here , the last 2 are from a cat rescue ... 😼 Lots of love from a German grandmother !!! 🌻
@Carrie nunya who are you to decide what someone should or should not be able to handle? People on the internet are so horrible and you CARRIE are one of them.
@@ev7985 She's selfish because she knows her limits?
This is incredible, we are currently fostering my husband's nephews and one doctor has given us an unofficial diagnosis of ADHD, but his therapist has given him an unofficial diagnosis of FASDs. His mother (my sister in law) drank HARD and smoked marijuana and I am convinced he has fasd. He is 8, but mentally is about 6 and is so much like these kids. All we want is a diagnosis, so we can find the best way to support him and we can learn how to deal with his behaviour in a positive way. After seeing this video I am convinced he has it.
That boys parents love him so much. I'm so glad he was able to be adopted by such a good hearted family who has the means to properly care for him and give him the understanding and effort he deserves
My husband and I raised a child whose mother abused alcohol and drugs while pregnant. He had many behavioral issues . He was very impulsive even violent at times. He suffered from night terrors when he was small. He never thought about consequences. He was very impulsive. He was easily led by others in his peer group. He got into drugs and alcohol and when high he jumped off a bridge. He did not survive and died at age 19. We very much felt the pressure from others who didn’t understand his problems. They felt we were just bad parents. We grieve for him still and wish he could have had a fulfilling life. We loved him very much and wish we could have somehow done more.
I am so sorry for your loss😥
What a painful loss. Bless you for giving him love and care during his short time here.
How wonderful you were to love and care for him. One never fully recovers from the death of a child. My heart breaks for you. From one grieving mother to another.....
Maureen I’m so sorry for your loss. I work with adolescent FASD kids in their highest periods of crisis. They are some of the toughest kids that come through the doors. They are everything you described in your grandchild- impulsive, behavior issues, etc. It is a 24/7/365 job to raise these kids. They don’t sleep well, they never slow down, they react to the slightest stimulus, and their reactions are extreme. You did not fail. You gave safety and 19 years; our system that allows this harm to innocent babies has failed. I hope your heart has found some peace.
I am glad he met you guys and got a chance at a decent childhood
My aunt Wendy has fetal alcohol syndrome. She's almost 50 and still lives with my grandparents. She's very high functioning though... she's been a kitchen manager at UCD in Davis CA for like, 10 years, and has worked there for close to 20. She'll never be capable of living alone though. Her mental state is that of a 12-14 year old girl. She's super rad though, I love her. It's crazy that this is the first doc that's popped up on this subject, for me. I'm an obsessive doc watcher, and it never occurred to me how few vids there are on this paticular subject.
Thanks for watching Megan!
Attitude Seem to be watching a lot of your vids lately! Thanks for posting, keep up the awesome work!
Awesome! 😀
She can run a major university's food program, but cant live on her own?
Something doesn't add up.
MrKevMan That’s not true. Even though working in a kitchen can be really demanding, it is regimented in a way that someone with certain disabilities could thrive, yet living on their own would be too overwhelming.
You only get ONE chance to grow a baby. For Pete's sake, lay off the spirits during pregnancy. These children are precious. What a shame they will be affected by this forever. Thank goodness this little boy (Jayden) is now in an environment in which his brain receives rich stimulation (sibling interaction, access to animals on his farm, building with Legos, etc.) and his soul receives love and care. Despite his personal obstacles, there's hope there.
He was unwanted by his birth mother. This is what can happen when you force women to give birth.
They don't care. I've had numerous arguments with women about drinking "It's no harm having one glass every now again"
Betsy Collins thanks for the obvious and super general comment??
@@DD-nd3fh oh get off of your abortion soapbox, you have absolutely no idea whether this mom was forced to give birth which is a stupid expressionist anyway. You are assuming something based on your own philosophy and agenda
@@DD-nd3fh They can choose to not have sex if they don't want childern
These heroic parents adopt a child with serious disabilities and they then get looked down on poor parents for their behavior problems. That's just deeply sad.
Lots of people are assholes when it comes to disability, and it's disheartening. These parents are doing such a great job ♡
@@polydactilism I agree with you ! The thing is. : out in public it is hard to differ a child having a mental disability from a bad behaving child just showing up a temper tantrum for a stranger . Maybe these wonderful parents should offer little cards to the strangers pointing at them etc , where it is written a little information about this disorder or any other disability ... Could this be helpful ???!!
@@dorisdaumann5914 I think that would be alot of extra work expected from the parents to hand out pamphlets, but to each their own. People with the privilege of time could take that on instead. Good activism is what will ultimately re-shape the belief systems that underlie people's reactions/empathies
No way
My father has FASD, his mother also drank while she breastfed him. He was born in the late 1950s, so the affects of alcohol on fetuses weren't well known. He's had several diagnoses including ADHD and bipolar. I used to hate him for his temper and childish behavior, I try not to now. I know that he could not help most of his behavior. If there is anyone here who has a parent with FASD, know that you are not alone.
Thanks for sharing Yael, we hope you enjoyed the episode!
Attitude you're welcomr, thanks for posting!
Do you have any health issues resulting from your father having fasd or are you completely healthy ?
May I ask how the relationship between your parents was?
Yael Feder are there Any Affekts to your Own Health? Did he inherited spmething to you? I am sorry I Hope Not but I Wonder if such things Happen.
I'm 25 years old and I suffer with FASD and I have ADD and I take medication for it. But as I grew up with this I am normal but I have my days were my brain acts younger then I am, and I have random break outs or temper tantrums, I have a mild effect of FASD and I need help in a lot of things. But I have problems asking for help, and I need to stay stimulated on certain things. But I mean all in all we all want to be treated like a normal person. ❤️
So we need a lot of patience ☺️ and you have to explain things thoroughly so that our brain and mind can function in time to understand what your telling us, along with big words you gotta break it all down, and with FASD sometimes we cant control our feelings either or deal with stress, so we have freak outs because we don't understand. So you gotta be patient with us .
Thank you for sharing Krissy, we hope your living a happy and healthy life now!
Good luck to you, Krissy
You are normal person. You happen to have a disorder like anyone else with a chemical lmbalance. I applaud your attitude. I was adopted and have struggled with anxiety disorder my whole life. I've heard thru the grapevine my bio mother drank while pregnant with me. I'm now 52 and after a lifetime of struggling I've finally come to love myself and my life. A large part of what bothered me was knowing she didn't want me and thought nothing of my well being while pregnant with me. It took a long time for me to come to terms with my origins. I'm at peace with myself now.
I have ADHD I was born in 72 when diet pills were the big thing the dr didn't know it would have an effect on me but it did I had a good mother but I have a predisposition to get paranoid if I'm worried I was put on disability when I was 23 I cry easy and can't handle stress and I have trouble learning I wish the drs had of studied this in fetal development my mom would have never took it I had a loving patient and understanding mom it wasn't her fault
Lisa Lentile I’m sorry for your situation, Lisa. My mothers mother took diet pills and it caused her death and perhaps contributed to mental illness in her children though they all have had high IQs. I hope despite struggles that you’ve found or will find happiness and health. Good luck to you ❤️
Jaden is so lucky to have such a wonderful family. And I'm sure they feel the same of him.
They are certainly a great family! :)
Im sure they dont but its too late now
Aw,, she didn't know why they didn't like her. Maybe its because she's short? Omg! That broke my heart!
That glass table give me goosebumps every time he passes by...
You and me both girl,my first thought was,how many times has he hurt himself on it...i would take it out...with his ADHD its a bad idea..
We adopted a child 35 years ago with FAS. Life was very hard since not that much was known at that time. I was very aggressive in getting her the help she needed. It is sad that they get judged for what their mom did to them. She has a husband and a perfectly normal 11 year old girl. Life is still challenging but there is hope for a good life for them. God bless all the fragile children🙏❤️
I believe that this is one of the very best channels on UA-cam.
Thanks for your kind words! Hope you stay tuned!😀
Dont think generally people know how strong someone like Kathryn is. I would have loved being her friend.
Thanks for watching Kathryn!
Thanks😄
Gosh, I really feel for Katherine when she says she has few friends and how people have been so cruel to her with words... Katherine, on the off chance you would be reading this comment right now, I justwant to say to you that you are a wonderfully valuable soul and anyone would be extremely lucky to call you a friend, so before anyone is so quick to judge you on having a condition that you cannot help having, let's all look at negative traits that those who have so horribly judged you happen to possess: judgement, intolerance and lack of empathy... meanwhile you strike me as a gentle soul and a great heart. You have a lot of reason to hold your head high and be very proud of yourself xx
Lizzy And Baby but she admits to being violent in the past!
Lizzy And Baby 0
Lizzy and Baby, I could not have said this better myself!
Thanks I really appreciate that. Anyone would be lucky and Blessed to be your friend too.
Lizzy And Baby she brought this on herself. There's no excuse for drinking while pregnant. There's adequate information out there now that there's no excuse. I have no sympathy for her as she was so willfully ignorant and didn't care for her child's future.
Anyone who adopts are great great people but ones who adopt and take in children who have special needs are super hero’s in my eyes!! Every child deserves a loving family and to see how far these children have come with these loving nurturing homes is awesome. To think where they might be if they weren’t taken in by people who dedicate the time and love no matter what obstacles and difficulties might be in the way is so special.
This is one disability that is avoidable. So sad.
so FASD can be misdiagnosed as ADHD if the mother were dishonest about drinking during pregnancy?
yup
Yes, I've seen it happen. But ADHD can be part of it. FAS is a syndrome, so it can be a collection of illnesses.
Fun fact: if a mother DOESN'T admit to drinking while pregnant, you actually CAN'T get officially diagnosed with FASD, even if you have all the other symptoms. They can only say "suspected FASD" until there's admittance by the parent or confirmation from another reliable source saying that they for sure drank.
Kristie Anderson If you don't have the hallmark FASD facial features (like a lot of space between your nose and mouth), then you probably do have ADHD, not FASD.
there are symptoms that are characteristic of ADHD and not FASD. it is a lot more complex than just saying someone is hyperactive and impulsive. People with FASD almost always have learning disabilities while people with ADHD may have trouble with school but do not technically have learning disabilities. there is more but that is basic differences
He should be careful with the cats. He could hurt them or vice versa....
There probably used to him though
Be careful with those adorable kittens 🙀
@@Chobaca animals don't "get used" to being handled roughly. He needs to be more careful or they shouldn't have kittens in the house.
Watching him handle the cats made me cringe so hard
@Christina Sweetheart There are plenty of cats.
This boy is very intelligent...he runs, jumps and navigates, cares for his family, in his own special way...he is actually recovering from a brain injury and doing well, It is only when he is highly frustrated, tired or as a feeling of not being heard, he may self harm or harm other. And due to the fact he is in an amazing environment!!...as he grows so will some neural path ways and he will blossom to be the best he can be! Thanks for sharing.
Thank you for watching Growing Together, hope you enjoyed this episode!
Growing Together god bless you . What kind words
Growing Together he is completely beautiful
There's no recovery from FAS, or other such things.
I wouldn't downplay his condition and be patronising by calling him "very intelligent". He has FAS, he has brain damage, it affects him and his family's life a great deal. He's doing really well, but he's not very intelligent. That's patently untrue.
Why a glass coffee table in the middle of his (evidently) play place where he jumps and twirls from the furniture? That looks like a serious accident waiting to happen!
It's an inch thick... Shut up!
The parents are absolute saints especially when it comes to their patience!
Amazing people aren't they, thanks for watching Kate
Kate Cunio I think my cousin was born with it. He was slow, looked strange and had a heart disorder.
i am a individual with fasd and i have live both these kids stories this one really hurt for me to watch. but we can be stronger than what people labelize us we will rise above!!!
giraffe4998 sometimes its helpful for people to identify because those people need extra love, that's all.
God bless them. I know I wouldn't have the patience.
Josh Popichak Me neither, I’d sell them on gum tree! Kidding. but you’re right, sooooo much excess energy.
Same!!!
Same
Awesome parents! But a glass coffee table with a rambunctious young boy... BOLD 😂
Hope you enjoyed the episode Josephine! Thanks for watching!
Attitude I definitely did! My stepsons have some issues that have yet been diagnosed but their biological mother admitted to doing cocaine and heroin while pregnant with both. My boys are incredibly lucky as even at their young age it looks as though they'll be able to live independently successfully. My heart goes out to these kids and their parents. So much strength and love! ❤
Thanks for sharing Josephine! Hope you and your boys have a great christmas!
Josephine Balch Agreed. That coffee table is scary.
this is sych a pure hearted dad comment. i love it
I have a cousin with FASD. We weren’t told what it was she had until we were adults. Our parents hadn’t even been privy to what it was that she had. The current process for prenatal genetic counseling, and testing has brought family history into the light. We had to ask what it was in the case that it was hereditary. Now that I know what it is, it is super obvious to see. Her social awkwardness, the tall tales, facial features, bodily features, are all on point. She is such a lovely woman, and great to talk to. Ultra reassuring, and a pretty great listener when it comes to things of the heart. She is on what I would estimate to be the cognitive, and emotional level of a preteen. When her mother was pregnant she didn’t know that it was dangerous to consume alcohol. Supposedly she only drank a few beers in the evening, and it still resulted in a pretty serious case of FAS. I feel like it has taught my entire family a great deal about patience, and finding the wonderful in people. To love them for all that they can do, not being frustrated for what they cannot.
Oh no. Makes me nervous seeing him with those kitties
Me, too. That's not ok.
What a poor, sweet little soul. So much has been stolen from him by his mother.
Blessed are the parents with the patience to lovingly raise these children because I simply couldn't deal with it!
Thanks for watching and sharing Danielle!
Bless they're pea picking souls because I never could take it on. I'd have a heart attack from worry , stress and heartbreak
I adopted my daughter who has FAS. I have had a child worker on McGuire AFB in NJ completely ignore me because I went to their organization for help because she is disabled. And the woman acted REALLY ANGRY toward me and refused to help me for like 30 minutes. She thought I was the birth mother. When she discovered I was the adoptive mother, her attitude went from angry and short to incredibly "sweet" and nice and helpful. I eventually confronted her on that and she denied it. I told her that that definitely occurred. Regardless of her pretending it did not. It was super obvious. I feel so bad for the birth moms because of workers like that.
The young lady is extremely well articulated!
Thanks 😊 from Katherine Law
Her house I’m Immaculent wow super clean look at that carpet
omg katherine made me cry. She has such a kind and innocent soul. I hope she is happy.
Maxie Wallace Apparently, she’s 3 comments above yours.(Katherine Law) she said she’s nothing like the boy in the video, she’s very gentle and caring now and has short hair 😀 (she’s wearing shades in prof pic)
Thanks Maxine. My name is Jed now. I was Katherine Law but now I am Jed Kevin Jones
Thanks Marie Wallace from Katherine Law
LEEGGGOOOOOSSSSSS!!! I know that feeling well. Diagnosed Asperger Syndrome and ADHD, the stimulation, sound touch sight(and sometimes taste😣) is the beeesssst. Thanks for sharing your stories!
No safe amount of alcohol during pregnancy! This video is heart wrenching.
with the way he jumps around in the living room, they should take that glass table out and get a softer wood one
You both are so patient and amazing. God bless your family always
Thanks for watching and your kind words Susan!
Catherine looks so happy to see her mom, so sweet!!
Thanks Isabel from Katherine Law
Being the parent of a kid like the first sounds like a nightmare. You can hear in the voice of the mother how tired she is.
I have watched almost all of these stories on this channel and this one really broke my heart These pour children. I really do feel for Katherine, I was bullied as well so I know how bad it hurts. I just want to give her a hug and tell her how wonderful of a person she and that she is worth something. She seems to be so happy in her new home and I think it's absolutly amazing she flourishing. I believe there should be so much more help for the people who are suffering from any kind of issue. A person's life is worth something and they need to be allowed to grow and learn l, no matter what they suffer from. No one should be brushed off to the side to rot. Great story! Keep up the great work.
April Chiginsky thanks
@@katherinelaw6408 Hi Dear Katherine - do you still live in that apartment you showed us in this video ?? It is so totally clean - you are a wonderful housewife 🌷😉 !! You are a very nice good hearted person indeed !! Let me send you a hug. - and a lot of love - from a German grandmother !!! 💚
Thanks April. That’s really lovely of you. My name is Jed now. I love hugs. I didn’t get hugs growing up
@@dorisdaumann5914 thanks 😊 I appreciate your love. From Katherine Law
Whenever I’m out and I see children acting out I try and never feel annoyed or judge bc you never know what the child is dealing with and def don’t know or understand what the parent is going through on a daily basis.
I really hope his parents keep a really, really close eye on those kittens. He looked like he was being kinda rough with them and it can cause the kittens to fear him or other people as they grow up. the kittens need to be raised properly just like children.
his parents keep a very close eye on him and they wouldn’t let him near the cats if they didn’t trust him to not hurt them, as they’ve taken things away from him before when he had tantrums. kittens are surprisingly resilient and you can’t really see how he treats the cats all the time from a short clip
I was thinking the same thing. His parents should really teach him not to be so rough with an animal. He has to learn to respect animals as well as people.
Joc Joc I work with fostering and rescuing cats and you’d be surprised how many people don’t know how to treat animals. Many animals are returned because kids hurt the animal and the parents are upset when the animal retaliates in defence. People need to learn to respect them and their space, they are not toys.
I empathize with Jaden's situation. But having pets in a home where the child has no impulse control and has episodes of agression is totally inappropriate.
@@DreamOfGenie I agree. I worked for an animal rescue organization and so many dear animals were returned for these reasons. Not every home is right for a pet. In this case I really worry about those cats, as he is not capable of any kind of self regulation.
Amazing parents! Thank god for people like them.
It sure makes a difference to have supportive parents! Thanks for watching BethanyDee!
He reminds me of my foster/ soon to be adopted brother. He is such a sweet kid and is so lucky to be part of this amazing family.
Katherine is so well spoken and insightful.
All these wonderful families deserve the best.
Love and hugs to them!
💖💖
Thank-you. My name is now Jed. I love hugs.
This video helped my friend diagnose her child. It was all ADHD and the Only diagnosis my friend had been given.
She was against medication and because of the limited diagnosis, she sought no therapy. When I saw this video it was like watching my child’s friend in real life, recorded. She’s an amazing Mom. Her world revolves around him.
Thank you for this video. I believe thousand will have a Eureka moment.
Everyone commenting about the cats when these poor people are suffering a disability through no fault of their own! The cats are fine, the boy is the one born from addiction and abuse and he deserves your sympathy. All these adoptive parents are absolute saints.
Thanks for your kind words Mugwort! Hope you enjoyed the episode and thanks for the support
Mugwort animals can actually be wonderfully therapeutic for people with neuro disorders. he should be instructed in how to handle them, but I think having them could be really beneficial to him.
My mom who raised me has this and we are hanging on my a thread in our relationship. I told a close friend “trying with my mom feels like climbing a rock wall where every surface is covered in glass” I feel so alone. I only want to share this in case anyone else here is in a similar situation so that maybe they don’t have to feel alone too.
the girl broke my heart :(
Yes, such a lovely, sweet person. I can't believe nobod stopped those girls bullying her.
@@thaliasghost I don't understand this ether ... where had been the teachers ??!! 😢
She doesn't tell if she talked about it at home ...
Katherine is such a sweetheart.
Thanks. I am Jed now
Is the family in danger when Jayden is bigger and stronger? I admire the parents for their love and commitment, I hope there is never a circumstance where someone gets seriously hurt.
Exactly what I'm thinking about. He can be potentially dangerous when he's grown up and stronger.
I was really worried while he was "playing" with the cats. I fear for them and the family.
Awww the father with his FASD son on the bike is one of the sweetest things I've ever seen
While I feel this is the most wonderful couple and such a blessing that this kind of selfless and patient people exist....I do feel very sad and sorry for the other children in the family. They will never have a normal family life, get relatively little attention since most of the parents time and energy goes to this 1 child. That’s obviously just my opinion🤷🏼♀️
You're very correct. I adopted 2 children from foster care and one is un-diagnosed but I feel very certain he has this and this is exactly right. No one else in the family's needs get met because he's so demanding of everyone's attention. Going out is a nightmare and people don't understand. It's taken a lot of me to not dissolve my adoption. I know it's not his fault but it's more than I signed up for and way more than I can handle since I already have a special needs biological child of my own.
There's a boy in my town, well not a boy he's like 25 but his birth mom drank very very heavily while pregnant and then left so his grandparents adopted him and he finished high school and even has a job and even though it's noticeable just by looking at him that he has it he is still smart and respectful to everyone and as sad as it is that it happened he still seems happy because loving people adopted him and gave him a great life and the people that adopt kids in general but especially with disabilities are true heroes
I think it is highly irresponsible of the parents to have kittens in the household. What were they thinking?
Agreed. Wait till they are older.
my husband has fetal al. disorder....he is legally blind (born 1953), he's really very intelligent. He does not make decisions dealing with time very well, and he loves walking. It's really his vision that's the problem. Born about 1 lb. and a few oz. his mother had him after 7 mo. gestation.
Omg i have a kitten if someone handled her like that I'd lose it! kittens need to be raised with lots of love and trust :(
meow Kittens are not china dolls. They were not hurt. He needs to be around the unconditional love that animals provide. He didn't hit them or kick at them or throw them. Yes, he was pretty exuberant and excited and picked them up but cats are flexible so they weren't being hurt. Its only our perception and humanize it. They aren't infant children. This little boy will grow up and have a special bond with animals. Animals can sense these things and will do a lot to help and they will have an amazing bond. But micro analyzing everything leads to increased stigma and judgement. The same could be said of any interaction and we know what happens to kids that have limited interactions with other living beings.
meow and a kid with disabilities doesn't...
oh poor cat that was being played with where it was beimg annoyed if anythimg by a really hyper kid. poor abused cat!
This video teaches me so much. Thank you.
I am Katherine but my hair is short now. I have FASD but I am gentle and kind. People who know me say I have the softest and most gentle hands in the world. I am not bad behaved or violent like the boy on this video. It's hurts that people think that every person with FASD is violent and has bad behaviour problems
Hi Katherine! Nice to see you on here. I hope you have made some friends 💞
Hello! Thank you for sharing your story. You are brave & kind. ❤
is it rude of me to ask what name you've chosen to adopt as you enter this next chapter of your life, since your bio says something about your gender being different than you & your parents used to think it was? I'm sorry. I'm a 20 year old trans girl (I don't feel mature enough to adopt the term "woman" for myself, and I was assigned male at birth) named Ellenor and I have autism, which makes me inappropriately curious.
@@Ancheladamichelada I have made friends thanks. My name is Jed now. Would you like to be my friend?
@@ashleysimmons9411 thanks and your welcome. Would you like to be my friend? I am Katherine in the video but now I am calledJed
His sisters are so incredibly patient and kind.
FASD can be misdiagnosed as ADHD. This happened to our child that we adopted. We found out from the birth mom herself that she drank alcohol and did meth during the pregnancy. Once CPS found out, it seemed like they didn't want our child to receive the diagnosis. We learned from others that it would be harder to rehome our kiddo if they had to, because now he's considered special needs - but we were blessed to be able to adopt him ourselves.
I am a 40 year old woman living with FAS. Growing up I had educational delays, mental illness, extreme outbursts of anger over nothing really. I consider myself lucky though because if FAS was a whole iceberg then as far as symptoms go I've only got the tip of it. When I say educational delays that's literally what I mean. I'm just as smart if not smarter than a lot of people, but the way I learn and memorize things is so convoluted I was considered impossible to teach. As an adult I still deal with the issues that come with FAS. In the form of rather severe treatment resistant depression and anxiety. I am socially stunted, I can not hold a conversation because I have never mastered the art of small talk, and groups of more than 10 people scare the living daylights out of me. Unfortunately my Mothers choice to drink through my pregnancy left me just disabled enough not to be able to function in a normal adult world, but smart enough to know what's wrong with me and be even more depressed about it. I will be on SSI and living at 90% below the poverty level my entire life unfortunately. All because of FAS and really bad stress reactions caused by the symptoms of it.
The real kicker comes in when you stop to think I've got 2 children. An 11 year old son and 7 year old daughter. They are in my care. Both born free of drugs and alcohol. However they've both got FAS symptoms. I don't know if the alcohol I got while in utero did something to my genetics or what but both my kids have been diagnosed with ADHD, and my son is on the Autism Spectrum. He's verbal and very high functioning, but he STEMS a lot. He's a toe walker and a hand flapper big time. When he's really stressed he has this high pitched whining noise he can make for an hour straight without taking a breath too. It's awful...like feedback from putting a microphone too close to a speaker.
Your kids don't have fetal alcohol syndrome then. They have gotten diagnosed wrong. Respectfully. I have it and read up on it and the only way you can get it is if the mom drinks.
It's not genetic or hereditary.
My cousin adopted two kids, siblings. They were only told the girl, who was 5 at the time that she had ADHD. They found out this year, what many of us close to the family already suspected, that she does has FASD. She’s just turned 20, can’t pass school (college, trade school...), has no ability to focus for 5min, can’t hold a job. Her parents are in huge denial and keep encouraging her to try programs at school that she cannot possibly get through let alone get a job in later! She’s also been diagnosed with depression, and other psychological problems. It’s sad really bc they may have been more apt to help her better had the truth come out when she was still a child.
Amazingly patient, loving parents. I hope the best of life to them all. ❤
When my parents adopted my brother they were told some drugs and alcohol may have been consumed while he was in utero. He seems to exhibit some of the symptoms displayed in this video. But it is a spectrum. He lives and functions on his own. Though not particular well. Unlike the first boy in the vid. He is completely unviolent . He recoils when exposed to it. I’d say he stoped maturing somwhere between 13-17, mentally. Though at times seems perfectly at par with his age. Though not mostly. I often wonder if my parents had to deal with others judging them by his actions. I’d like to think not as we lived in a small rural community. And all would have been aware that he was adopted.
We all love him and try to help him. But we can only do so much. He must be his own person. However many mistakes he makes we wish he would learn from, but never does.
These guys are legends
My sister has fasd and this is very informative. Thank you
No worries Kris, we're glad our videos have helped you, thanks for watching!
God bless this family for having so much patience. I can't even imagine how difficult a child like this would be. I know that I wouldn't be able to do it.
Sharp edged glass tables and wooden corners everywhere! Watching him zoom through the house and graze his skull was very stressful!
God bless this beautiful family not only did they adopt a child in need which most couples would not dare take on a child with a disability they seem to be very patient and loving family I wish you all are very long a beautiful life together.
It is so sad that the parents get blamed for poor parenting, rather than realizing the child has a medical condition. My sister has autism, depression & anxiety & her problems get blamed on poor parenting or a bad family life, it is so frustrating when the medical professionals won't listen to the family.
I would remove the glass table top from the room where the couch's are. If he were to jump and fall onto the glass it could possibly cut him deeply and or kill him
Angie Burrage thought the SAME THING
Now this I agree with fully. I would never have a glass coffee table and that simply because I have kids!
Angie Burrage our dinner table and coffee table are both made of glass. PS two kids.
Maybe the keep the glass table top, right where he plays, and gets all crazy and jumps off the couches - so that one day, hopefully, we WILL end it all! That's what I'd do!!!!
I agree! I wish I could include a picture. I feel onto a table as a child and almost died.The scar is so thick and deep and wrap around my thigh.About one inch wide from my knee up.
I'm very curious how they can medically differenciate fetal alcohol syndrome from ADHD? It makes me wonder how many ADHD diagnosed children actually have fetal alcohol syndrome...with the shame attached I'm sure many mothers wouldn't admit to drinking during pregnancy.
These parents are amazing. Providing a stable loving home for a child with this condition cannot be easy. He's a lucky little lad to have found a home there xx
So glad this child didn't fall by the wayside and is lovingly cared for
That glass table kinda freaks me out with his hyper activity. Awesome family!
Im legal guardian for my Granddaughter who has FASD AND AUTISM, We went shopping when she was much younger, about 4/5 and she was quite a handful as it was over stimulating for her which she had trouble handling. One elderly man said to his wife loudly for me to to hear “look at it! If it was a dog u wouldn’t walk it on a lead!” I won’t say what I said to him but let’s just say everyone heard it🤬
I have various problems, a neonatal heart condition, severe Depression (for as long as my life/60 years now), constant anxiety and some anxiety attacks, poor focus, learning issues (math, memory, foreign language comprehension)frequently in a nervous energy state, some slight facial ( the small and smooth structure of the upper lips)
anomalies and more issues which I believe are due to FASD. About 10 years ago my Mother finally admitted (after previously denying for decades) that she drank during the pregnancy. My Dad had told me decades ago that she drank frequently (straight whiskey and other hard liquor) during 1960 ( my gestation period of time) and also my sole sibling (in 1963). Prior to the marriage she had obtained a Juris Doctorate (Law) degree and a Masters in Social Work specialized in Medical/Pediatric Social Work, therefore she was not ignorant and uneducated, this she had a serious alcohol dependency. There is not much recognition, research, services, support and understanding of the people on the lower end of the FASD, such as myself. We "fall through the cracks" so to speak! I have to help myself.
Many people who abuse alcohol have been abused/molested as kids.
sORRY MAN
❤️.
He likes to jump and jump off of heights…I love that~maybe gymnastics, diving/swimming would make his brain happy?
His sisters are so sweet. Same with his parents. Very lovely family.
He won’t be able to sit still with that energy surging in his system…try sitting him on a huge yoga ball and give him scheduled breaks with rewards each time he manages his own breaks without disrupting the class.
He reminds me of myself so so much…I couldn’t sit still and I had very similar impulse control issues and it was very challenging. I just get him so much.
Sending love. You guys are fantastic and you are going to give everyone affected, the best lives and I have so much love and respect for all of you. To the kids-you are fantastic! You each have exceptional, unique qualities and I just know you are going to have wonderful lives!
I know a beautiful young lady in her early 2os. I now know. What she and her teen brother suffer from. I am friends/family with her mom. She never said what was wrong . but now I know. They all live at home. My beautiful girl is a "Katherine". Now I totally understand her. Known her since she was 5 years old.
Hi I was Katherine Law in this video but I am called Jed now
Hi Nedra Leggett it’s me Katherine from this video. My name is Jed now. Will you be my friend?
He has a lot of energy he should be in sports. Tennis, horseback riding, may calm and finding ways to calm him and exhaust his energy and keep his mind busy. Hes adorable.
This was exactly what I needed today. The consequences of drinking during pregnancy need to be KNOWN
He seems very smart and so cute!! He’s very active and seem he gets bored quick lol... His family is very gentle and kind with him. Also got nervous with that glass table there he could get hurt if he hit it or jumped on it!! He is blessed to have a loving family
people often act like fasd is caused by frivolous women drinking while pregnant apathetically or maliciously, but it’s not. they’re addicted to alcohol, and it’s not like an addiction can go on pause for nine months. obviously they aren’t in a place to raise their kid themselves (at least not right away) but that’s why charging people criminally, as i’ve seen suggested, wouldn’t prevent this.
Finally! The voice of reason. Alcoholism is just as much a disease as any other.
God Bless these parents. Boy, did he hit it big in the parent "lottery"!
They live in a lovely home. Looks like there's a ton of room to run around,, but I can't imagine never being able to sit still or the other symptoms.
These people are amazing, I know I wouldn't have the patience to do this.
My adopted brother has this and it's kind of hard to deal with but he's amazing all the same
We hope the best for your brother Emma, thank you for sharing your story ! We hope you enjoyed the episode!
I was diagnosed with FASD and some of the symptoms hit me home. Thanks Attitude for highlighting this kaupapa, it might be a taboo
Subject but this koorero needs to be highlighted
Just watching this triggers my anxiety
Im being honest, God bless these parents , i couldnt do it, my nerves
Those poor cats
Blobby Blob My thoughts exactly. :/
Blobby Blob I bet those poor kittens are no longer with us...
ReneeandJimmyG nut he will be excused because of his disability. He should never be allowed near them unsupervise!
ReneeandJimmyG I have cats they are very theryputice
Blobby Blob I have the same conditions
Wow, that family is incredibly strong and brave. The FASD boy is quite literally emotionally draining some of them... it's hard to even watch. Best of luck and hopefully the meds can help the boy into the unforeseeable future.
My adolescent and teen years were spent in foster homes. Most of the children were there because of substance abuse. Not all foster parents treat their foster children this well. It's understandable to correct them when they do something that could hurt themselves or others. But, my foster parent was very controlling, mentally abusive, emotionally abusive and corrected my foster brother, when he did annoying things. His room was like a prison sell. He was always getting punished for something. He would be punished for those quirky behaviors. It can be a challenge for those living around them, but I know the difference between abusive parenting, verses parents struggling to figure out how to raise their child. It really was an unfortunate experience.
Jadons mum and dad are so lovely, they want the best for him and that's something that gives me hope
They're a great family! Thanks for the support Hannalee!