Ding dong Iran Prez is dead? JK Rowling derangement? Ontario stops perps?

Поділитися
Вставка
  • Опубліковано 19 тра 2024
  • The Iranian president is dead. Ontario is going after car thieves.
    Just stuff I find amusing and horrific
    News Theme 2 by Audionautix is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 licence. creativecommons.org/licenses/...
    Artist: audionautix.com/

КОМЕНТАРІ • 235

  • @TheAyeAye1
    @TheAyeAye1 Місяць тому +52

    Yeah. JKR made the actors not the other way around.

  • @tommix6016
    @tommix6016 Місяць тому +84

    The Ontario government is full of tools.

    • @Princess_Feona
      @Princess_Feona Місяць тому +7

      Tools tend to have a function and a purpose though.

    • @GilbertdeClare0704
      @GilbertdeClare0704 Місяць тому +5

      All extremely blunt and with loose handles

    • @johngidman4574
      @johngidman4574 Місяць тому

      If you actually knew anything, you'd know that the Ontario government cannot do anything about penalties for car theft. Criminal penalties are the perview of the federal government, dumb ass. This is just a message to YOUR favourite government, the like minded dumb asses in Ottawa.

  • @stivosaurus
    @stivosaurus Місяць тому +27

    Ontario should just pass a law saying the criminals have to obey the law. That's really the crux of the problem.

  • @guygadbois3010
    @guygadbois3010 Місяць тому +78

    "Daniel Radcliffe has admitted to filming several scenes of the epic Harry Potter franchise, in which he starred, while intoxicated." (Vanity Fair, 2/6/2012). So let's have a little gratitude for Radcliffe's acting coaches, Jack Daniels and Captain Morgan.

    • @alan-sk7ky
      @alan-sk7ky Місяць тому +11

      And his good friend since school days Johnnie Walker, and ofc his old headmaster Mr Haig...

    • @secondchance6603
      @secondchance6603 Місяць тому +2

      Don't forget Jim Beam.

  • @cynthiacarter9055
    @cynthiacarter9055 Місяць тому +84

    Some idiot actually thought Rowling was a nobody before the movies? The movies that all the studios were desperate to get rights to make because HP was on fire and raking in the hundreds of millions? wow. That is funny. ;)

    • @liljenborg2517
      @liljenborg2517 Місяць тому +14

      He got it exactly backwards. Rowling doesn't owe her wealth and fame to the child actors lucky enough to be cast in the movies based on her record-breaking best-selling novels. Radcliffe and Watson owe THEIR careers to Rowling. If Radcliffe, Watson, and Grint weren't cast in the movies, someone else would have been - and the movies would still have been as good as they were. Nobody would have ever heard of Radcliffe, Watson, or Grint and Rowling would still be the richest woman in Europe.

    • @damionkeeling3103
      @damionkeeling3103 Місяць тому

      @@liljenborg2517 It's like that halfwit who starred in the Hunger Games movies who claimed she was the first female action star.

    • @secondchance6603
      @secondchance6603 Місяць тому +5

      The same woman that said Dumbledore was 'gay' just to appeal to the very mob that turned on her lol.

    • @cynthiacarter9055
      @cynthiacarter9055 Місяць тому +2

      @@secondchance6603 yes, it is somewhat ironic. And I don't expect she is going to doubt her allegiance to the left, but I do respect the fact that she has refused to back down on the Trans issue, since it would have made her life easier to do it, yet she has refused. Granted, she has a lot of money and that makes it easier to defy them, but still. Most people's egos can't take being spoken ill of by those on their side of the aisle.

  • @caldodge
    @caldodge Місяць тому +50

    Ontario is behind the times. Blaming car thieves, not car manufacturers? Inconceivable!

    • @harrymills2770
      @harrymills2770 Місяць тому +4

      ... and inconthievable.

    • @damionkeeling3103
      @damionkeeling3103 Місяць тому +1

      @@harrymills2770 I hear that with a Sicilian accent for some reason.

    • @harrymills2770
      @harrymills2770 Місяць тому

      @@damionkeeling3103 That'th right! That Character from Princess Bride wuth a Thithilian!

  • @benhynum9879
    @benhynum9879 Місяць тому +26

    Mark Twain would have ruled on Twitter.

    • @silverjohn6037
      @silverjohn6037 Місяць тому +8

      Don't be silly. He wouldn't have lasted a day on Twitter before getting cancelled. He made fun of everyone, not just the one's you're supposed to;).

  • @ChaoticYak1
    @ChaoticYak1 Місяць тому +32

    Most of those protesters would never be allowed one foot into Iran by the hard-liners. They're not exactly known for their acceptance of diversity.

    • @user-fn7pm1dd8u
      @user-fn7pm1dd8u Місяць тому

      Iran, a place where most of us couldn’t be ourselves without being beheaded or hung. What a nice place! Let’s let more of them in The States and Canada! They assimilate so well.

    • @theevermind
      @theevermind Місяць тому +6

      IDK, I think they'd be let in, then shown the door ... to the roof of a 3 story building.

    • @secondchance6603
      @secondchance6603 Місяць тому +2

      Let them shout it from the rooftops.

  • @joemadden4160
    @joemadden4160 Місяць тому +32

    Whew!
    Was worried there for a minute.
    Didn't think the most important news channel wouldn't have a broadcast today.
    Thank goodness for ePauling News.

    • @GilbertdeClare0704
      @GilbertdeClare0704 Місяць тому +3

      Yes, me too. I was so reassured by this news update that my Lamborghini will now NEVER be stolen again, as thieves definitely won't want to lose their Driving License

  • @ChimeraArchive
    @ChimeraArchive Місяць тому +44

    Ah yes. Legal bureaucratic procedure and licensing, that'll stop car thieves dead in their tracks....from laughter.

    • @Cowboycomando54
      @Cowboycomando54 Місяць тому +3

      After all it works for guns, oh wait........

    • @keithagn
      @keithagn Місяць тому +1

      ​@@Cowboycomando54 How dare you question Dear Leader Justin's wisdom! I am OUTRAGED!!!

  • @HardRockMiner
    @HardRockMiner Місяць тому +32

    Iran... iran so far away. I just ran, iran all night and day. He couldn't get away.

  • @templargfx
    @templargfx Місяць тому +13

    pretty sure those actors owe their careers to Rowling, not the other way around. what a doofus

  • @reb3102
    @reb3102 Місяць тому +15

    Clicked for the thumbnail, stayed for the insightful humor.

  • @ozzymandius666
    @ozzymandius666 Місяць тому +13

    Auto-theft just a license violation now.

  • @morecringe89
    @morecringe89 Місяць тому +21

    I agree, they can comeback to Iran anytime now.

  • @tatersquad2000
    @tatersquad2000 Місяць тому +31

    Super duper double dog license suspension!

  • @newwavepop
    @newwavepop Місяць тому +7

    i do NOT understand why this channel is not massive huge yet.

  • @Princess_Feona
    @Princess_Feona Місяць тому +7

    This is rapidly becoming my very favorite regularly recurring video series. Paul definitely has a way with pontificating upon the topics of the day.

  • @orthopedix6202
    @orthopedix6202 Місяць тому +15

    Waste of paper and time next gun licenses, use a gun in a crime lose you gun license.

  • @CRUSTYCANUCK
    @CRUSTYCANUCK Місяць тому +1

    Well done Paul! Cheers!

  • @shaunsutton699
    @shaunsutton699 Місяць тому +10

    I played Sting’s “They Dance Alone” when I heard the Iranian President died. And they say God does not answer prayers!!

    • @raychat2816
      @raychat2816 Місяць тому +1

      Because naturally as the other 8 billion people on the planet, god must be on your side, how many sides does he have ?
      Let me answer this one, “OURS is the correct one” 😂😂😂😂😂😂 is eeeevery language on earth

    • @stillcantbesilencedevennow
      @stillcantbesilencedevennow Місяць тому

      ​@@raychat2816meh. He certainly isn't with the Arabs.

  • @steve2008s
    @steve2008s Місяць тому +2

    That was a Great Voice! I didn't know U had this Channel ! subscribed!

  • @pedroares6562
    @pedroares6562 Місяць тому +10

    Love all the news, but the Ontario one is awesome. "Oh no, they will take my driver's license, better not steal that car...." I mean boith are illegal, I don't think they care too much about that.

  • @dcollins4679
    @dcollins4679 Місяць тому +2

    Keep fighting the good fight, Sir. Love your content.

  • @phonepunk7888
    @phonepunk7888 Місяць тому +3

    Well I watched all the way through and the thumbnail really is there for no reason, but I'm not complaining!

  • @lj6278
    @lj6278 Місяць тому

    So funny. Thanks for the chuckles. The license suspension was hilarious. It's almost unbelievable.

  • @moyockmoo2
    @moyockmoo2 Місяць тому

    Right on!

  • @jr2904
    @jr2904 Місяць тому +3

    I saw a joke from someone else yesterday saying, "from raisi to craishi". I'm sure he's confused about where the virgins are.

  • @BrianSmithPlanetEarthDiver
    @BrianSmithPlanetEarthDiver Місяць тому +1

    Love the insight. It's warped and twisted - served up just the way I like it. The license suspension is sure to cause a lot of car thieves to second guess their profession...FFS. keep it up Chato!

  • @mcsg_pelecan
    @mcsg_pelecan Місяць тому +1

    Best news and commentary report ever!

  • @Cowboycomando54
    @Cowboycomando54 Місяць тому +3

    I guess the Iranian "President" also championed confrontation with gravity and the ground.

  • @maximoco4693
    @maximoco4693 Місяць тому +4

    Taking away driving license for thieves, reminds me of 'Hot Shots! Part Deux' where Dexter (Rowan Atkinson) mentions that he is unable to walk because his shoelaces have been tied together. lol

  • @BinkyTheElf1
    @BinkyTheElf1 Місяць тому

    Bravo, sir. You rocketh.

  • @steprockmedia
    @steprockmedia Місяць тому +3

    Thank goodness for those movies! Rowling was a failing author before they came along.

  • @LordEriolTolkien
    @LordEriolTolkien Місяць тому +2

    Weird how I had read the entire HP series, twice, as an adult, before the first movie had even been filmed

    • @TheKarnophage
      @TheKarnophage Місяць тому

      I find that hard to believe since the last 3 books were not published till after the second movie.

  • @HerrDark
    @HerrDark Місяць тому +1

    Suspending their licence is going to keep them from stealing cars, because banning long distance hole makers from violent felons has worked so well.

  • @_Emerald_Eye_
    @_Emerald_Eye_ Місяць тому +7

    Thumbnail girl: caterpillarcos (Aleksandra Bodler)

  • @markstowe802
    @markstowe802 Місяць тому

    I love your update to Twain’s famous quote! 😂 The Hermione picture kinda made me feel like a dirty old man! Thanks Paul!

  • @Philistine47
    @Philistine47 Місяць тому

    In other Ontario criminal justice news, murderers will now also be charged with littering, and armed robbers will now also be charged with jaywalking. That'll show those baddies the government means business!

  • @kevinthetruckdriver353
    @kevinthetruckdriver353 Місяць тому +1

    Would you say Ontario's Ford had his *"Don't"* moment??

  • @wtf_usa5597
    @wtf_usa5597 Місяць тому +2

    I don't think not having a driver's license is going to be a big factor in discouraging car thiefs from stealing cars.
    Just sayin'.. 🤔

  • @liljenborg2517
    @liljenborg2517 Місяць тому +1

    The problem with the job fairs Iran might do on US college campuses is they want to host them on the tenth floor roof of high rise buildings for some reason.

  • @superionmaximus9900
    @superionmaximus9900 Місяць тому +2

    Is there an official rule on how much the government has to treat those on who's behest they are allowed to govern like idiots before collectively we can stop paying taxes? I mean I feel so much safer that career criminals will be kept off the roads in stolen cars due to their terror of losing their official government permission slip to drive a car. If anything that just means criminals don't have to worry about paying the $100 for a new license photo every 5 years. Frankly I'm envious.

  • @daishikaze3986
    @daishikaze3986 Місяць тому +2

    I was unaware of Harry Potter until the Order Of The Phoenix was published. The CVS where I worked had a Display for the then newest book ready to hit the floor as soon the release date arrived. All week people were asking about it (During the Graveyard shift even!). We put the display out at Midnight, by 5am they were all gone! Yeah, J.K. Rowling was really nobody before those three gifted actors deigned to play the characters she created in a movie 🙄

  • @CircumlunarFeasibility
    @CircumlunarFeasibility Місяць тому

    well said

  • @Allan_aka_RocKITEman
    @Allan_aka_RocKITEman 12 днів тому

    As far as sane laws go, it sounds like Ontario should now call itself Offtario.

  • @TanifsThoughts
    @TanifsThoughts Місяць тому +2

    If Mark Twain were here, I think he would approve. 🤣

  • @ShuckleLord
    @ShuckleLord Місяць тому

    Damn you had me laughing non stop great video😂

  • @illuminahde
    @illuminahde Місяць тому +2

    Eli Koptur can't keep getting away with this

  • @Princess_Feona
    @Princess_Feona Місяць тому +2

    How about jail? Did they think of that?

    • @silverjohn6037
      @silverjohn6037 Місяць тому +2

      They need the space for the bouncy castle trucker protesters.

  • @cobba42
    @cobba42 Місяць тому +2

    Life time suspension?
    Good call on making it nigh impossible to give up the life of crime.
    Wanna go straight? Too bad, you ran with the wrong crowd that one time and stole a car. Your life is over.

  • @quatore-5886
    @quatore-5886 Місяць тому +2

    Stay well, Paul ❤

  • @mikect500
    @mikect500 Місяць тому +2

    Those perps and their names don't look very Canadian.

  • @slice1208
    @slice1208 Місяць тому +1

    Wouldn't taking away their driver's license make it so that all they can do to make money is crime?
    Hard to drive to a job without a driver's license.

  • @keithagn
    @keithagn Місяць тому

    Great video. Unfortunately, it's all true. Regards from the Left Coast of Canada 🇨🇦 formally known as British Columbia...

  • @Malbeefance
    @Malbeefance Місяць тому +1

    I've heard people say that listening to something gave them a headache because what they heard was so stupid. Even after 20 years of government service, I never experienced such a headache until I heard this Ontario car theft idiocy.

  • @thomaskingsbury6560
    @thomaskingsbury6560 Місяць тому

    You are good really good!

  • @GoddessOfWhim2003
    @GoddessOfWhim2003 Місяць тому +4

    2:28 wait, strike that, reverse it

  • @benh715
    @benh715 Місяць тому

    I love your news reader voice.

  • @EndingSimple
    @EndingSimple Місяць тому

    Twain also said "The difference between the right word and the almost right word is the difference between 'lightning' and 'lightning bug. ' Thanks for swatting a few.

  • @kavkavvana4608
    @kavkavvana4608 Місяць тому

    Ding dong x

  • @charlesward8196
    @charlesward8196 Місяць тому

    Brilliant!

  • @johncosta8538
    @johncosta8538 Місяць тому

    I wish I could give more than one like here.

  • @joelmitchell7597
    @joelmitchell7597 21 день тому

    If Rowling hadn't already been wildly successful with her books, the film studio would have phoned in a forgettable movie on account of their astounding risk-aversion.

  • @richdurbin6146
    @richdurbin6146 Місяць тому +2

    How much money are the movies making now compared to the books? Heh Rowling continues to cash in.

  • @dennismoore1116
    @dennismoore1116 Місяць тому +1

    What if the car thieves are too young to have a license? Then you cannot take away what they don't have. Dang those criminals are smart. Or they are compared to Ontario's government anyway.

  • @genghisgahan9623
    @genghisgahan9623 Місяць тому

    Twice in that video, I did a double take and said to myself-
    "did I just see/ read that?" 😮

  • @mxvega1097
    @mxvega1097 Місяць тому

    Excellent, Paul! You're starting to channel the feel of Chris Morris's "The Day Today"!

    • @aPaulingNews-nn3xe
      @aPaulingNews-nn3xe  Місяць тому +1

      I’ll have to check that out.

    • @mxvega1097
      @mxvega1097 Місяць тому

      @@aPaulingNews-nn3xe Early 90s, BBC, Chris Morris, Steve Coogan. Very dry.

  • @gradybeachum1804
    @gradybeachum1804 Місяць тому +3

    Perps don't have no license anyways.

  • @613harbinger316
    @613harbinger316 Місяць тому

    Man in a ski mask busts a car window and reaches in to unlock the door.
    A Canadian police officer approaches him.
    "License and registration please."

  • @barryelverson9486
    @barryelverson9486 Місяць тому +1

    Ontario really needs Conservatives to be more like Alberta’s.

    • @de7403
      @de7403 Місяць тому +1

      I know, i just hate when other conservatives arent as conservative as me. I'm very upset you know.

  • @robinhood9128
    @robinhood9128 Місяць тому

    Thanks!

  • @noneyabidness9644
    @noneyabidness9644 Місяць тому

    Ohhh, no! Condolences to the helicopter's friends and family.

  • @kroberts8866
    @kroberts8866 Місяць тому

    He didn’t jump on the use of ‘stiff’ in the headline. Missed opportunity.

  • @DeepWebDiary
    @DeepWebDiary Місяць тому

    You almost killed me with this one.

  • @CurtisDofMontana
    @CurtisDofMontana Місяць тому

    Paul at 1:19 Nice Joe Walsh reference I'm old enough to get that.. 🎵🎶🎵 My Maseratti does one-eighty-five
    I lost my license, now I don't drive
    I have a limo, ride in the back
    I lock the doors in case I'm attacked
    I'm makin' records, my fans they can't wait
    They write me letters, tell me I'm great
    So I got me an office, gold records on the wall
    Just leave a message, maybe I'll call🎵🎶🎵 😂😂😂 Nicely played Sir.

  • @kevinmccabe7263
    @kevinmccabe7263 Місяць тому

    As silly as the Ontario law is I at least support that they are TRYING to be hard on crime 😂

  • @williamholmes7529
    @williamholmes7529 Місяць тому

    Love that thumbnail mate 😘😉

  • @MrMont804
    @MrMont804 Місяць тому

    😂😂😂😂 loving this.

  • @hevonperseensuti
    @hevonperseensuti Місяць тому

    If I remember correctly, Rawlings demanded that the actors of the movies had to be all brittish.

    • @aPaulingNews-nn3xe
      @aPaulingNews-nn3xe  Місяць тому

      Yep. When Spielberg was briefly involved he had other ideas. He was not invited to do the movies.

  • @KilianMuster
    @KilianMuster Місяць тому

    Or in Latin: Sic tacuisses philosophus mansisses.
    "If you had kept your silence, you would have stayed a philosopher"

  • @COOLFRIEND
    @COOLFRIEND Місяць тому

    Is that Ariel Rebel in the thumbnail? Talk about a throwback.

  • @stephenlyall7759
    @stephenlyall7759 Місяць тому

    And boy I’m glad it exists.

  • @MrInjun382
    @MrInjun382 Місяць тому

    All you aredoing by the lifetime suspension is making that person forever dependent on the government

  • @blshouse
    @blshouse Місяць тому

    Ah, yes that screen grab from the movie is why I became a fan of the movies at the tender age of way too old.

  • @jibberism9910
    @jibberism9910 Місяць тому

    In my village, back in the day, we'd have a thing or two to Tweet about boys like Daniel - let alone girls like Emma.

  • @gavinshickle1814
    @gavinshickle1814 Місяць тому

    That first quote lol

  • @BobAbc0815
    @BobAbc0815 Місяць тому

    Lifetime Licence Suspension will also ruin Chances of Rehabilitation.

  • @Mazalinda
    @Mazalinda Місяць тому

    Re Potter it will prove that any kid could have played those parts when the novels are made into a TV series with new actors. Radcliffe, Grint and the other one have hardly distinguished themselves acting wise since Potter. Long live JKR and all women in whose cause she is willing to fight!

  • @ghostbeetle2950
    @ghostbeetle2950 Місяць тому

    That Rowling Tweet HAS to have been a joke...surely????!
    ("Dear God, please, NO!"-meme sounds intensify.)

    • @aPaulingNews-nn3xe
      @aPaulingNews-nn3xe  Місяць тому

      Not a joke.

    • @ghostbeetle2950
      @ghostbeetle2950 Місяць тому

      @@aPaulingNews-nn3xe Inconceivable. But not the dumbest thing I've heard in recent years, sadly.

  • @juddgoswick2024
    @juddgoswick2024 Місяць тому

    Ian Flemming owes a tremendous debt to Daniel Craig for... No, he doesn't.

  • @AxtonLennox111
    @AxtonLennox111 Місяць тому

    Well...at least the thumbnail wasn't clickbait

  • @redsorgum
    @redsorgum Місяць тому

    It might be more effective if they are given a life time ban from buying Big Gulps…….🥤burrrrrrp

  • @LordEriolTolkien
    @LordEriolTolkien Місяць тому

    I have Never been more aPauled !

  • @the_lost_navigator
    @the_lost_navigator Місяць тому

    It's cheaper to drive without licensing and Insurance, get caught, pay the Fines and be back on the Road before the next Gas-price hike...
    Or
    You could just land a Government job and have it all payed for you by the Tax-Payer. Crooks, nonetheless.

  • @CurtisDofMontana
    @CurtisDofMontana Місяць тому

    🤔🤔 Hmmm a helicopter accident crash you say Hmmm 🤔 no way it could have been the Awesome work of the IDF... Sayeret Matkal, ..

  • @KR-fy3ls
    @KR-fy3ls Місяць тому

    Google image search is failing me.

  • @kirbymarchbarcena
    @kirbymarchbarcena Місяць тому

    Still waiting for the "wether or not" news section

  • @ceoatcrystalsoft4942
    @ceoatcrystalsoft4942 Місяць тому

    4:25 caterpillarcos is a fine example of a cosplayer showing the wokies why they are wrong!

  • @jaysdood
    @jaysdood Місяць тому

    Rowling owes her success to the child actors she made famous *SNORT* 😂😂😂