How To Stay In Love

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  • Опубліковано 10 тра 2024
  • Matt Walsh and divorce lawyer James J. Sexton discuss what men and women can do to stay in love in their marriages.
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КОМЕНТАРІ • 369

  • @AbrahamKingston
    @AbrahamKingston 15 днів тому +297

    Perfect marriages or relationships don't exist; each one is unique. What suits Adam may not suit Peter. Nonetheless, I've learned that there's always a solution to every problem. Five years ago, my wife and I were facing divorce due to challenges in our marriage, but we managed to work things out. It was a tough period, but we survived.

    • @GodfreyKelz
      @GodfreyKelz 15 днів тому

      The wisdom in your words resonates deeply, and I genuinely wish my emotions echo yours. Despite our current distance, I cannot envision my life without her; my love for her is unwavering. I crave her return, and I'm prepared to do whatever it takes to make it happen. We've explored different avenues, such as therapy, in our efforts to mend our relationship.

    • @AbrahamKingston
      @AbrahamKingston 15 днів тому

      Learning to let someone you love go is always a tough journey, but in my case, I had the wisdom of a spiritual mentor who kept my marriage from crumbling. Her name is Suzanne Ann Walters.

    • @GodfreyKelz
      @GodfreyKelz 15 днів тому

      I appreciate your direction. I'll swiftly look her up online. Thanks. I'm hopeful that following this course of action will bring about positive changes for me too; her absence is deeply felt

    • @AbrahamKingston
      @AbrahamKingston 15 днів тому

      You are Welcome

    • @gussampson5029
      @gussampson5029 12 днів тому

      Oh is this some scam to sell marriage counseling services? Lol y'all are evil.

  • @deeshannongarrison5115
    @deeshannongarrison5115 18 днів тому +41

    I'm OVER all of it - feminists, MGTOWs, gold diggers, red pillers, sprinkle sprinkle, drizzle drizzle... if you got problems in your relationship, stop looking for answers anywhere outside of it. There's me, there's you, and there's us. Figure out your own dynamics and work with your partner. Simple as.

    • @onetwothreefourfivesix789
      @onetwothreefourfivesix789 17 днів тому +1

      Yes, ma’am! 🥂

    • @Laissez_Faire
      @Laissez_Faire 16 днів тому +4

      @@onetwothreefourfivesix789that simple huh. Just like losing weight for some. It should be simple yes. But obviously, obviously, it’s not.

    • @youtubecommentator6023
      @youtubecommentator6023 7 днів тому +1

      @Laissez_Faire often times, the simplest answer is the best answer. It's our own fault for complicated things.

    • @Laissez_Faire
      @Laissez_Faire 7 днів тому

      @@youtubecommentator6023 fair enough. The simple answer is usually the best answer. But the efforts put into it is what’s complicated. Making a million dollars is very simple but it’s difficult to execute

  • @GenXfrom75
    @GenXfrom75 18 днів тому +51

    21 years… intimacy matters. Play matters. Touch matters. Connection matters. Even when it doesn’t have a chance to lead to sex. But we like to sneak around to hook up, nothing illegal. But a “mom and dad have to go have a private chat for a few minutes.” ❤

  • @michellesnyder6690
    @michellesnyder6690 19 днів тому +91

    Successful married love is more choosing to be loving than it is a feeling. To me, love is just as much a verb and way of being than an emotion.

    • @Enate1989
      @Enate1989 18 днів тому +6

      Love is 100% a verb

    • @person6768
      @person6768 18 днів тому +6

      The emotion is called infatuation. It comes and it goes and it comes back but that's not love. It's a symptom of love except when it's just lust but it's not love. Love is an act of the will to serve another person and a commitment to them. Like the other person said it's 100% in action.

  • @SomeCanine
    @SomeCanine 19 днів тому +122

    People need to actually enjoy being together before they get married and not just in a romantic way, although that is still important. If you don't enjoy being around the other person, you won't want to be intimate with them. You won't want to talk to them. You won't try to do things together. You do need to like the person at a fundamental level. Chemistry is not enough.

    • @LuvableAF
      @LuvableAF 19 днів тому

      👀My love 🩵🩵🩵🐸

    • @oldhickory4686
      @oldhickory4686 18 днів тому +9

      I agree completely. The problem is people want that feeling of attraction they had when they first met someone, and they will chase it just like people chasing after youthful looks. it's a dead end path. My love for my wife has changed over time. It isn't the "butterfly" feelings kind of love. It grew deeper; a sacrificial kind of love, where her interests and well being supersede mine. I believe if people can reach that stage, you have found true love.
      Acts 20 KJV 35 ...and to remember the words of the Lord Jesus, how he said, It is more blessed to give than to receive.

    • @robbiewatson3525
      @robbiewatson3525 18 днів тому +3

      Yes and you’re forgetting the most important part. GOD.

    • @stephenr85
      @stephenr85 18 днів тому

      I don't think the issue is that most people don't know this. The problem is that it's impossible to see past the "romance" in the beginning. That's why it's so important to be very careful about who you sleep with. The infatuation stage can be very dangerous, and nothing kicks that off like physical intimacy for someone craving a fix for their loneliness.

    • @SomeCanine
      @SomeCanine 18 днів тому +1

      @@robbiewatson3525 If you don't enjoy being around the other person, being the same religion won't help you.

  • @Hunter-2689
    @Hunter-2689 18 днів тому +43

    Its very cruel to stop giving a man affection (sex) which is such an important thing to feeling loved and desired. However womens arousal is tied to her oxytocin levels, if shes not getting affection she grows sexually cold. Its a vicious cycle.

    • @quovadismurica1989
      @quovadismurica1989 15 днів тому +10

      So true. My husband of over a decade has never stopped making me feel so very attractive and why wouldn’t I want to be intimate with a man who makes it clear that I am what he desires most? Win-win!

    • @jenster29
      @jenster29 11 днів тому +4

      It's not a vicious cycle though. It's easily fixed by being affectionate in a non sexual way with her

    • @SummerSun-sg3wf
      @SummerSun-sg3wf 8 днів тому

      I'm always reading about how "cruel" it is for men but in my marriage my husband always decides if and when we have sex. I did the right thing, was a virgin before marriage and as soon as I gained weight with kids, he basically stopped except once a month.

    • @youtubecommentator6023
      @youtubecommentator6023 7 днів тому

      It's a very vicious cycle. My parents are still married but they sleep in different rooms now. It's hard not to see them as roommates than a married couple.

    • @Hunter-2689
      @Hunter-2689 7 днів тому +1

      @youtubecommentator6023 Are they unhappy? That's they key here, did they both agree to it and are content in life or is one unwilling and the other has cruelly separated from the other while still being married? Because not all sexless marriages are unhappy. For some, old age changes the relationship to more friendship love than passion and that is ok. Hormones decline and so does sex drive.

  • @cailin5
    @cailin5 18 днів тому +78

    I think it’s also important to consider why women often stop having sex in the first place. Women are not naturally averse to sex - they have a biological instinct to reproduce too - but sex is inherently more emotional and intimate for women, so if the husband doesn’t make his wife feel safe, loved, and desired OUTSIDE of sex, then sex becomes very uncomfortable for a woman. This doesn’t mean that the husband is being abusive, but yea if you come home from work and you take out your frustrations on the people and things around you, or you aren’t engaging verbally with your partner, or your impatient with your kids, or you don’t say thank you to your wife when she serves you dinner and cleans up after you…don’t be surprised when she doesn’t feel emotionally safe engaging in sex with you, and doesn’t desire you physically.

    • @Jayme-zr3ce
      @Jayme-zr3ce 18 днів тому +12

      THIS.

    • @demolitionwilliams7419
      @demolitionwilliams7419 18 днів тому +6

      Great points

    • @ashleyarlo
      @ashleyarlo 17 днів тому +16

      Absolutely. Sex doesn’t begin in the bedroom. It starts with the day to day interactions. Women have to feel close to you. Also, older women have a lot of trouble with sex due to their hardware not working right. It can cause them pain and infections due to the tissue changing from lack of estrogen.

    • @frostmakers
      @frostmakers 15 днів тому +5

      You say like it's only a man's problem, but how many times the wife takes out her frustrations when the husband comes from work, or don't say thank your for the sacrifices he made. That's the problem, there are days when the wife is not in the best mood, other days is the husband. That's why in a marriage there must be always sacrifices to make each other happy. The problem is when one wants the other to make him/her happy all the time without giving anything in return.

    • @salishapeters8038
      @salishapeters8038 14 днів тому +4

      @@frostmakersaddress why she is frustrated in the first place, please

  • @MissusShuvin
    @MissusShuvin 19 днів тому +25

    I love to bear hug him, kiss him, and cheer🎉 "you da man!!🎉 when he leaves to work. Then go back to sleep 😴 like a spoiled housewife 🍓🐎

  • @athomewiththemrs9410
    @athomewiththemrs9410 19 днів тому +41

    I was once told if you’re having sex 10 times a year you should worry. I was also told by that person, in a healthy marriage the couple has sex 2-5 times a week. God made it special for a reason.

    • @youngbubbles
      @youngbubbles 19 днів тому +4

      5 times is so funny

    • @Agape122
      @Agape122 18 днів тому +2

      I think there are exceptions like after you give birth, or when you are about to give birth. It can be physically not good to do it that much.
      I think this man is right but he is confusing sex with physical appreciation and love.
      I believe a man has to feel appreciated and loved, that you love being with him and show you affection.
      If you do that, sex will happen naturally, and it will not be a problem if there is a situation where it's physically not easy or good to do it.
      Also I wonder why then marriages in India last very long, there is few divorce and in hindu religion sex is not allowed even when married.
      It's suposed to happen just to conceive kids, but that's it, it's suposed to be a sin to do it for any other purpose.
      Yet they stay married. I think it also matters how seriously you take that union and how much work do you wanna put in.

    • @SireofSuns
      @SireofSuns 17 днів тому +3

      @@Agape122 In India they may be staying married for other reasons. What happens to divorced women there?

    • @Eye_of_a_Texan
      @Eye_of_a_Texan 17 днів тому

      I only see my wife twice a week so..

    • @Agape122
      @Agape122 17 днів тому +3

      @@SireofSuns yes it's pretty bad what happens to divorced women but also to divorced men actually.
      Divorced men are not seen in a good light either.
      Basically your parents and your whole family considers it a tragedy or an evil eye upon the family, and it can be an scandal that makes the whole family lose their " good reputation".
      Plus in India parents need to give you permission to get married so few parents will give permission to their daughter or son to marry a divorced person ( man or woman)
      Also even if nowadays this doesnt happen anymore in modern places in India, but in villages, if you are a woman, you will have nowhere to go sometimes because your parents may not accept you back if you divorce and a woman either lives with her parents or with her husband there isnt other options.
      However, in the cities, a woman can work , rent a shared flat etc... still it's culturally very condemned.
      There are a lot of people that feel trapped in those marriages , a lot of people who fall into alcoholism or goes to prostitutes sadly.
      But I have seen very happy marriages too, where they ....maybe are not having a lot of sex but learnt since childhood to give primordial importance to taking care of their marriage.

  • @quovadismurica1989
    @quovadismurica1989 17 днів тому +11

    My husband of almost 12 years has never stopped letting me know he thinks I am beautiful and downright smoking hot ever since we met, and I have to say nothing gets me in the mood more than feeling desired. Even if I know he may be fibbing a bit 😁 The man’s smart and I can’t say I mind!

  • @89mso
    @89mso 18 днів тому +38

    I couldn’t imagine not worshipping my wife. She takes priority over everything and everyone, including my own children. Obviously I love my children to death but at the end of the day they’ll eventually grow up and have families of their own, but my wife will still be by my side.
    I pray my children find a partner and have a relationship as great as my marriage when they become adults.

    • @vardaainur-michaelmas5462
      @vardaainur-michaelmas5462 17 днів тому +5

      Aww yay! That’s beautiful!

    • @TheArtist441
      @TheArtist441 16 днів тому +4

      your children will also learn what real love looks like between a man and a woman and in turn find great partners themselves instead of seeking broken, damaging and harmful relationships. Cherish each other like the day you met and kids will be sure to follow suit one day. Well done, keep it up

  • @amymikola
    @amymikola 19 днів тому +70

    Can’t tell you how many women I know-family and friends-who just are NOT having sex with their husbands. Decent husbands. Not deadbeats. I tell them if they don’t provide he may fulfill his needs elsewhere. They laugh and say no way. Um…a man can only handle so much.

    • @jamesg3808
      @jamesg3808 19 днів тому +15

      Yes, and a lot of women also complain that their husbands do not desire sex. This is a less recognized issue.

    • @jimjohnson530
      @jimjohnson530 19 днів тому

      Why are you spamming the comments with this statement? It can happen the other way around but its not enforced by culture. Women routinely weaponize sex and starve men into obedience. Its a joke in sitcoms etc.Horrible

    • @redpillfreedom6692
      @redpillfreedom6692 18 днів тому

      ​@@jamesg3808In that case, it's a sign that the woman is an insufferable harpie to the point where the thought of touching her makes his dick shrivel up.
      But of course those women who make this compaint will never look inward since that would require accountability on their part.

    • @djkori5521
      @djkori5521 18 днів тому

      ​@@jamesg3808 thats what we call outliers haha but yeah your sex drive does dip when you get older

    • @TheSonyExperience
      @TheSonyExperience 18 днів тому

      @@jamesg3808they complain about f@cking everything

  • @christinat.7264
    @christinat.7264 18 днів тому +10

    True. Being mindful of the other's needs. Deposits into your relationship: kind words, hugs, thanking them for their efforts and work, asking about their day, genuine concern for their needs being met. It all adds up.

  • @neilochando6309
    @neilochando6309 16 днів тому +5

    "Trust, character and most importantly reciprocity will lead to great relationships." A line I got from the guy running the Mastery Order channel a few years back and it stuck to my head. Every time my wife and I argue, I go back to that, do something for her, she does something for me and the situations never escalate.
    Good message.

  • @kamishi-ww5ug
    @kamishi-ww5ug 19 днів тому +19

    I love my mom's advice growing up lol
    "Marriage is about if you love that person enough to put up with their bullshit for the rest of your life" lol Obviously I was a young woman she was telling this to. Having been married now for many many years, I know it's not exactly that simple but then again, in a lot of ways, it is. Her other advice was great too--"Sex is easy. Relationships, especially marriage, takes work."

  • @ekatrinya
    @ekatrinya 19 днів тому +27

    And that's the cycle. Men stop the attention and affection and women stop having sex. Porn is often to blame.

    • @redpillfreedom6692
      @redpillfreedom6692 18 днів тому

      Women use sex as a means of manipulation, thus their husbands turn to porn as a consequence. But that would require tradcons to hold women accountable for something, so they turn on their gynocentric blinders for that reason.

    • @youngbubbles
      @youngbubbles 18 днів тому +3

      💯💯💯

    • @edenbreckhouse
      @edenbreckhouse 18 днів тому +3

      Prove it. With data. Otherwise you're just another misandrist.

    • @stephanieveloso5326
      @stephanieveloso5326 17 днів тому

      Read the book "Your Brain on Porn", by ​Gary Wilson. There are more studies, but thats the one that comes to mind to answer your statement. @@edenbreckhouse

    • @Laissez_Faire
      @Laissez_Faire 16 днів тому +1

      Blame it on the porn

  • @FM-tx5es
    @FM-tx5es 19 днів тому +16

    Matt, these segments with Sexton are so spot on and very interesting. So glad you hooked up with these vids

  • @jamesg3808
    @jamesg3808 19 днів тому +104

    Having a wife who hates sex is a fate worse than death.

    • @dsadik666
      @dsadik666 18 днів тому

      Never date or marry a woman who does not like sexual activity or sex.

    • @nancygorman
      @nancygorman 18 днів тому +14

      If you just want to be friends why get married…

    • @kaylar.8126
      @kaylar.8126 18 днів тому +14

      Every guy I've dated has a low sex drive. I want sex more often than they do. (At least once a week, which is not a lot) It can be the same for women, too. 😮‍💨

    • @corackadile
      @corackadile 18 днів тому +11

      ​@kaylar.8126 from my understanding, if a man has a low sex drive, it is due to high stress in other areas of his life...

    • @jamesg3808
      @jamesg3808 18 днів тому

      @nothinghere695 Women enjoy sex too, if not more. Having a husband who does not want sex is a nightmare for women too. You would understand if you actually had a sex drive.

  • @gnarlyspoon
    @gnarlyspoon 18 днів тому +15

    He’s right…but it’s not new info. Gottman, Harley, Chapman, etc. have been researching and preaching this stuff for years. The problem is that people (especially in the USA) are too self-centered to put it into practice. A happy marriage is an “other-centered” endeavor.

    • @SummerSun-sg3wf
      @SummerSun-sg3wf 8 днів тому

      Yeah one gives up all their desires (especially women) while the other decides everything

    • @gnarlyspoon
      @gnarlyspoon 7 днів тому

      @@SummerSun-sg3wf In a healthy marriage spouses strive to honor each other’s dreams/desires. Love is “willing the good of the other.”

  • @MamaBasics101
    @MamaBasics101 18 днів тому +21

    My husband is hardworking and doesn’t tell me he loves me. However he shows his love to me through hardwork and dedication. If I was waiting for him to say what I want to hear I would always be disappointed however I learned to interpret the way he shows love so I am always appreciative of him even though he doesn’t say it out right.

    • @user-jx3pm2dg6b
      @user-jx3pm2dg6b 17 днів тому

      Im not in a place to say but my mom and dad have the same kind of thing, my dad is neurodivergent and a workaholic and my mom needs a lot of attention, she realized this a few years ago but she knows now that is how he shows his love and he actually does care. I think its just hard for her to want to communicate over and over the things she needs, and i completley understand if you have to remind someone to say they love you, do they really love you? Off topic but interesting I'm glad you've figured it out. I hope you both stay happy!

    • @Laissez_Faire
      @Laissez_Faire 16 днів тому +1

      Telling someone you love them it’s such a cheap trick. In other cultures there no such thing as telling someone you love them. You simply show them you love them. Hugging someone tight, working hard and taking crap from others to be able to provide, cooking for your partner with love, asking another if they need anything and obviously pleasing a man sexually. These are things people can do and the simple “I love you” won’t be needed. Two people that hate each other can say “I love you” to each other.

    • @AnaRocio2001
      @AnaRocio2001 16 днів тому +1

      @@Laissez_Faire 💯 agree

  • @Nitra813
    @Nitra813 15 днів тому +2

    I heard a great quote the other day from a healthy married couple.
    “Sex is something you experience WITH your partner not something you do TO your partner. If it’s not about pleasing each other or putting their needs before yours then it’s reckless, neglectful and selfish. No one wants to be with a selfish partner.”
    Oh and “duty” sex isn’t sexy either. That gets old quick.
    No one withdraws from the things they actually ENJOY. So with all these men claiming they have little to no sex you may want to go deeper as to why. No one seems to want to delve into the WHY.

  • @ghettomarc50
    @ghettomarc50 18 днів тому +7

    Walsh: "What should women do--"
    Lawyer: "Sex!"

  • @robbiewatson3525
    @robbiewatson3525 18 днів тому +55

    Not sex. That’s the expected superficial answer. Because sex comes and goes. We get old, sick, have health problems. It’s all GOD. God has to be the common denominator here.

    • @tank6641
      @tank6641 18 днів тому +10

      Sex is still vital - you dont have it with 99.99999% of people you have in your life.
      God is vital, but you didn't notice your spouses spirituality first when you saw them across the room.

    • @Fiddleslip
      @Fiddleslip 15 днів тому +3

      A fundamental of christian marriage is that the spouses are not to deprive each other of sex except by mutual consent in the case of abstaining for prayer (1 Cor 7: 3-5). Of course, you need God needs to be the foundation of the relationship, but again, the Holy Spirit says through the mouth of St. Paul that we should not deprive one another, lest Satan tempts us through our lack of self control.

    • @youtubecommentator6023
      @youtubecommentator6023 7 днів тому

      No, you need both. We have spiritual AND physical needs. You can't have a healthy relationship if you only have one without the other. And God was the one who built us this way. He could've made us in a way that didn't require sex in order to be connected to your spouse and/or to have kids but He didn't. He designed us to have sex and to be attracted sexually to our spouses. Sex is not a bad thing. It's what we do with sex that can make it bad.

    • @CrimsonLibra_20
      @CrimsonLibra_20 7 годин тому

      Right👍

  • @BrianReplies
    @BrianReplies 19 днів тому +6

    I think that this kind of messaging is....over time...going to prove to be extremely helpful for humanity.

  • @Jake-Drake
    @Jake-Drake 19 днів тому +49

    When a husband mistreats his wife, she tends to lose respect for him and definitely does not desire intimacy. Speaking on behalf of a friend.

    • @aleksanderpopov5060
      @aleksanderpopov5060 18 днів тому +9

      “Mistreats his wife” can be literally anything. You can be the best person in the world and some women will never be satisfied. And if they have nothing to complain about they will start making things up inside the jellybrain, no matter how petty small or stupid that thing might be. There is no such thing as love, you can be respected and be given peace as a man and that’s all we men need.(occasional sandwiches and dusting and head) is also important as far.

    • @youngbubbles
      @youngbubbles 18 днів тому +3

      ​@@aleksanderpopov5060Trouble in paradise??

    • @aleksanderpopov5060
      @aleksanderpopov5060 18 днів тому +2

      @@youngbubbles some

    • @Jake-Drake
      @Jake-Drake 18 днів тому +4

      @@aleksanderpopov5060 when I chose the words "mistreats his wife" I did so to avoid being dramatic but what I actually meant was abuses his wife and this can include but not limited to physical, sexual, verbal, psychological. You state that there is no such thing as love which I don’t understand and you further state that all a man needs is to be respected and be given peace. Some men, as well as women, are nasty and downright evil and respect and peace mean nothing to them. Hmm, not to bring in politics but take a look at the respect and peace Israel gave Hamas. How did that work for them?

    • @thegenzcompass2526
      @thegenzcompass2526 17 днів тому +7

      Exactly. Men are not perfect either. The red pillers like to blame women. What if, and just if, we're all flawed humans with our own set of problems? ​@@Jake-Drake

  • @lawrencetalbot8346
    @lawrencetalbot8346 19 днів тому +47

    Sex. The biggest thing I hear about marriages failing is they have little to no sex life

    • @queenpurple8433
      @queenpurple8433 19 днів тому +14

      Not sure why people care about sex so much as if it’s the most important thing. Kind of an immature and undisciplined reason to let a marriage fail.

    • @youngbubbles
      @youngbubbles 19 днів тому

      No sex is a symptom of a much bigger issue than simply "no sex life" . There's a reason there's no sex.

    • @ennuiblue4295
      @ennuiblue4295 19 днів тому +9

      ​@SlickyGamer you've got... some major issues 😑

    • @lawrencetalbot8346
      @lawrencetalbot8346 19 днів тому

      @@queenpurple8433gonna guess you’re a woman. It’s not about making sex the only thing. Rather it’s that once the sex stops, everything else begins to break down. Again I always hear things like we ended because of xyz, but then I’ll ask the man what their sex life was like and they’ll say none. Then the woman will always give the cliche response of “what does it matter if we have sex or not”. If you aren’t having sex, clearly the intimacy is gone, the attraction, the attention to your partner, the working out of frustration, etc. Once you reach that polar opposite threshold where the woman is absolutely refusing to negotiate, it’s over

    • @gamerguy6990
      @gamerguy6990 19 днів тому +11

      @@queenpurple8433 it’s sex between you and your partner, not sex between swingers. If you don’t feel a drive for your partner or refuse them that drive, you’re bound to have issues elsewhere.

  • @TheOnespeedbiker
    @TheOnespeedbiker 15 днів тому +2

    This is back to two basic ideals about marriage.1) lust is a feeling; love is an action. 2) Marriage is forever (sans abuse). One of the best examples was Ruth Graham; the famous wife of Christian evangelist Billy Graham (married for 63 years), was once asked if she ever considered divorce, she replied, "Murder yes, divorce no".
    Another truisms are, you need to show appreciation for your spouse all the time and cute has a short life span; IOW people never tire of being appreciated and the things your spouse did, that you once found cute, will often become aggravating over time.

  • @jamesg3808
    @jamesg3808 19 днів тому +23

    Sex is just as important, if not more important, to women as it is to men. There a lots of cases of women who lament about their husbands not desiring sex.

    • @jimjohnson530
      @jimjohnson530 19 днів тому

      More often goes the other way. American women are taught to use sex as a reward for “good behavior” in marriage and a tool for manipulation prior to

    • @redpillfreedom6692
      @redpillfreedom6692 18 днів тому

      No it really isn't, especially when the male sex drive is more easily stimulated.

    • @L_3551
      @L_3551 18 днів тому +3

      Nope.

    • @jamesg3808
      @jamesg3808 18 днів тому +1

      @@L_3551 What? You disagree?

    • @edenbreckhouse
      @edenbreckhouse 18 днів тому +1

      Show me that data that proves your point.

  • @loganrasede5440
    @loganrasede5440 19 днів тому +22

    Have Fr. Chad Ripperger on before Micheal Knowles does

  • @abigailthesnail88
    @abigailthesnail88 17 днів тому +3

    This is so good for me to hear right now in my marriage. I read your article the other day too. It made me cry. I’m going to be better for my husband because he’s better for me ❤

  • @MiniMotoAlliance
    @MiniMotoAlliance 19 днів тому +22

    The man has a point

    • @carriejustice7433
      @carriejustice7433 19 днів тому

      Yes. A few of them.

    • @Jayme-zr3ce
      @Jayme-zr3ce 18 днів тому

      That a woman should just screw him even if she doesn't feel like it and all he has to do is say she looks pretty? 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 LAUGHABLE.

  • @LordPhroz3nGhost
    @LordPhroz3nGhost 8 днів тому +1

    I would love to take a walk and just talk with this gentleman. no weed or drinks necessary, just wisdom and charisma. He's very cool

  • @user-oy1fj6vq8f
    @user-oy1fj6vq8f 19 днів тому +13

    Wonderful! Thank You for reminding me that it’s important for my husband that I continue to be sexual.

    • @Jen-mf9rm
      @Jen-mf9rm 18 днів тому +2

      I think he stressed intimacy

  • @DonesdeMotivacion
    @DonesdeMotivacion 13 днів тому +1

    This guy is honestly a treasure. Imagine a guy who's job is to capitalize from your life trying to give you advice on how to save it so he doesn't have to get in and charge you money

  • @paulthiessen6444
    @paulthiessen6444 19 днів тому +59

    My happiness is the responsibility of my wife, and hers is mine. That is the very definition of love.

    • @rbfoster
      @rbfoster 19 днів тому +24

      You cannot let your happiness be dependent on someone else providing it for you.

    • @Matthew_Klepadlo
      @Matthew_Klepadlo 19 днів тому +8

      The definition of love is willing the good of the other.
      That’s what St. Thomas Aquinas said.
      My mother said that love is putting others’ needs before your own.

    • @Origen17
      @Origen17 19 днів тому

      ​@@Matthew_Klepadloyou are over analyzing what he Said. He actually agree with you.

    • @paulthiessen6444
      @paulthiessen6444 19 днів тому +8

      @@rbfoster am I dependent on my wife for my happiness? I guess after 27 years of being loved, I suppose I am. And that is why she is precious to me. My father in law passed a few years ago, he loved his wife dearly. It took time, but she built a life for herself without him. But it helped that she had many other good people in her life.

    • @trinahughes1230
      @trinahughes1230 18 днів тому +3

      I would never put the responsibility of my happiness on anybody , but myself.... it's not a destination, it's a state of mind. You could have everything , and still not be happy or have nothing and be the happiest person in the world. Yes there are things we do to , for or with our partners to bring them happiness and joy .

  • @SanchoGracie
    @SanchoGracie 19 днів тому +31

    Granola & BJs. Write the book

  • @stevenundisclosed6091
    @stevenundisclosed6091 16 днів тому +2

    Sex is the glue that holds marriage together. Without it, men and women are just glorified roommates.

    • @quovadismurica1989
      @quovadismurica1989 15 днів тому +1

      Sex and intimacy more broadly, yes. I can’t imagine being my husband’s roommate! What a horrible thing to imagine.

  • @badshodi
    @badshodi 19 днів тому +12

    These two guys both have fantastic hair. Im so jealous 😂

  • @jsm2687
    @jsm2687 11 годин тому

    Things to protect in your marriage:
    Emotional Connection
    Physical Connection
    Being on the same page most of the time
    Avoiding financial stress
    Respect and Selfless love

  • @witblitsfpv1265
    @witblitsfpv1265 7 днів тому +1

    It's not hard to keep a man happy.

  • @zamzagirl89
    @zamzagirl89 18 днів тому +10

    This advice only works in healthy relationships. Tell an abused woman to just sleep with him is horrible advice. This only works in safe spaces.

    • @edenbreckhouse
      @edenbreckhouse 18 днів тому

      Anyone who has experienced trauma and hasn't dealt with it has no business dating.

    • @zamzagirl89
      @zamzagirl89 18 днів тому +2

      @@edenbreckhousethey are talking about in marriage not casual dating. There are a ton out there in long term very abusive relationships that will only get worst with "with sleep with him more." ... In a normal, healthy even strained but still healthy relationships this is great advice. For those who aren't there right now, it's not. That's all I was saying.

    • @georgefromdownthehall3334
      @georgefromdownthehall3334 18 днів тому

      Nobody said that

    • @zamzagirl89
      @zamzagirl89 18 днів тому +2

      @@georgefromdownthehall3334 I relistened and your correct, I misinterpreted how he started that. I was distracted and should not have commented without being certain I had heard the whole conversation correctly. Yes, most relationships would be better with more physical intimacy although I do stand by the fact that sexuality for a woman is almost always tied to her emotional feelings towards her partner. Any issues unsolved in a relationship for a woman will usually be a hindrance to her mood. Also how much external factors people don't even know about have effects from meds to hygeine products and food. It's just, not always as simple as have more sex. Nuances I suppose. :)

  • @lindaklase3821
    @lindaklase3821 19 днів тому +2

    We need more of this.

  • @bolotabr12
    @bolotabr12 19 днів тому +3

    Great video 👍

  • @Imtavin15
    @Imtavin15 18 днів тому +2

    It's so simple. Great video.

  • @user-ts7yg7xu3e
    @user-ts7yg7xu3e 5 днів тому

    Brilliant! Excellent takeaways.

  • @UseI2Unknown
    @UseI2Unknown 14 днів тому

    This was a really nice interview to watch. Polite and thoughtful. Makes you think…

  • @BIGHIM87
    @BIGHIM87 19 днів тому +1

    Got to SAVE THIS VIDEO for later… straight motivation on how easy it is. ❤

  • @user-pc3xq9gi2k
    @user-pc3xq9gi2k 18 днів тому +2

    This is wise, wonderful true advice.

  • @mialamban3972
    @mialamban3972 13 днів тому +1

    There is an important factor not mentioned for us women…the hormonal change brought about by aging, same with men and their prostate issues

  • @jessedavid4271
    @jessedavid4271 18 днів тому +1

    5/12/24 - This vid speaks simple truth
    Kindness is everything
    Appreciation is everything
    Recognition is everything
    ~~~
    The most important is the little things that matters
    Love doesn't conqueror everything
    It is the little things we consistently do for each other daily
    The little things that leaves a lasting / indelible / lingering impression
    ~~~
    Just like that after glow sex feeling
    And yes sex is a driving force for men
    It isn't the "All, End All"
    But sex in a loving relationship
    Sure does make a man feel desired / good / special
    ~~~
    Doing the little things doesn't have to be a struggle
    Be cognitive in the moment
    Be authentic
    Be you
    ~~~
    Deep within the well of your being
    Within your psyche / physicality / spirit
    Treat others as you would want them to treat you
    Now that is Love
    ~~~
    As Einstein would say:
    "Love is the most powerful force"
    To me this means in the cosmos / stars / universe
    In creation ...
    Namaste
    Salaam Alikum
    Shalom Shalom
    Shabbat Shalom
    Amani Na Upendo
    (Love and peace - Swahili)
    Blessing and Peace
    Katonda akukuume
    (God Bless you - Uganda)

  • @katekam8600
    @katekam8600 17 днів тому +3

    Someone explain further for me please. What if you have sex daily and your partner gets bored? You try everything to spice it up but in my experience I still get cheated on regardless. Because it’s “dull” to “familiar” or “boring”. Which has happened with every man I’ve been in a committed relationship with.

    • @tryphenarose384
      @tryphenarose384 17 днів тому +1

      If this is a pattern for you, then it's probably safe to say you have a habit of choosing the wrong men. Familiarize yourself with the red flags of cheaters, and avoid them to the best of your ability. It's not always easy, because even if you trust someone for a long time, there is always the chance they will betray your trust. However you can't control others. Any man who cheats on you, even though you attempt to make the relationship work, is not worth your time. Good riddance and move on with your life.

    • @aaronkelley3865
      @aaronkelley3865 13 днів тому

      Stop having sex with men before you marry them. Get to know them first. Find out that you work well together regardless of sex. THEN get married; THEN have sex.

  • @somewhereinthemidwest9827
    @somewhereinthemidwest9827 10 днів тому +1

    Mine turns out to be a habitual cheater so that’s why I don’t sleep with him.

  • @shawncook712
    @shawncook712 16 днів тому +2

    What if you are Mrs Roper? Just starving for affection.

  • @stuartlunsford7556
    @stuartlunsford7556 19 днів тому +15

    I can't imagine being fully able to do something easily to make my spouse happy...and not want to do it. That's just insane. It's not just sex.

    • @jaywalshmusicandsong1736
      @jaywalshmusicandsong1736 18 днів тому +2

      Don't get married

    • @Nitra813
      @Nitra813 15 днів тому

      When you recognize that it is “just sex” for to your spouse and not true intimacy you miss out on that euphoria and satisfaction during those sexual encounters. If your spouse is selfish in bed then yes it’s pretty easy to not want to have sex with them. This is completely one sided and should be addressed.

  • @BIGHEADjr51
    @BIGHEADjr51 19 днів тому +3

    It’s called…like your lover. Not difficult

  • @jonny5841
    @jonny5841 14 днів тому

    Great video

  • @user-HellcatHemi
    @user-HellcatHemi 17 днів тому +2

    He's not wrong & Idk how pple can live in that dysfunction & chaos for I'm over it. Can't we all jst get along?

  • @joshpitts25
    @joshpitts25 16 днів тому +1

    This has been the most impressive video ive watched about this subject. Wow

  • @Peggyg13
    @Peggyg13 13 днів тому +1

    I like this lawyer ! He goes straight to the heart of the issue. Wives should give men sex, food & good attitude and you have a very happy marriage.

    • @zoem3095
      @zoem3095 3 дні тому

      And….vice versa

  • @matthewposton3243
    @matthewposton3243 18 днів тому

    I thought that was very moving. As people, we can have complex inner lives but, at our core, we are very simple. To talk about love like that and the simplicity of acts that just make the other feel like they are valued reminds you that love isn’t that complicated either

  • @jenniferconley8682
    @jenniferconley8682 18 днів тому

    So true!

  • @flowerlullaby
    @flowerlullaby 18 днів тому +2

    My parents have been sexless for over 30 years according to my dad. They'll never divorce.

    • @Jayme-zr3ce
      @Jayme-zr3ce 18 днів тому

      I can guarantee your father is cheating 🐖

    • @Laissez_Faire
      @Laissez_Faire 16 днів тому

      Some people don’t care for sex. Doesn’t mean he’s happy or not getting it from someone else

  • @benjaminp9628
    @benjaminp9628 18 днів тому +2

    I like the way he pronounces “each other”

  • @agricolaregs
    @agricolaregs 10 днів тому +1

    I kind of think you do owe your partner sex. Sex is part of the contract. Like you agreed to only do this thing with each other and not others. You can’t just stop having sex. Not in a rape way. Don’t come at me. But if there is no sex, there is no contract.

  • @tiff63078
    @tiff63078 14 днів тому +1

    Yup a very interesting interview

  • @R1CO.1818
    @R1CO.1818 19 днів тому +2

    I like how we learn just to tell the truth, and still people won't understand.

  • @pukupuku
    @pukupuku 19 днів тому +10

    Being a woman with a sex drive is a hell of it’s own.

    • @dsadik666
      @dsadik666 18 днів тому +2

      Wrong

    • @pukupuku
      @pukupuku 15 днів тому +1

      @@dsadik666 Wtf would you know about it bucko?

    • @BadAssNigga95
      @BadAssNigga95 7 днів тому

      I hear ya sis

  • @charlessandor5256
    @charlessandor5256 День тому

    “Loan from God,” that quick line struck deep. So true. Those in love are very much blessed. Those who seek to destroy it are victim to the lies created by the enemy/deceiver. When the devil tries to remind you of your past, remind that loser what’s its future…defeat. I plant my flag and die on the hill of the LORD and love. I’m rooting for those who read this and that you too experience love.

  • @carriejustice7433
    @carriejustice7433 19 днів тому +6

    I think that this 9 minute clip of 2 men talking just made alot of women and men realize that they could and should do better for their spouse. It is such simple truths that we all KNOW, but we tend to take our frustrations of life out on our spouses, instead of remembering that they made us forget or ignore the frustrations when we began, and how good we felt forgetting and ignoring it all, together. Im not sure if anyone else will even understand that, but its how this made me feel. We start to blame each other for bad days when we should be sharing our bad days and laughing off the rest of the world, together. ❤

  • @Oggydog313
    @Oggydog313 17 днів тому +2

    Thank you for leaving the Jewish daily

  • @OpEditorial
    @OpEditorial 17 днів тому +2

    This does appear to be what most marriages in the US turn into as a matter of course, one day you're having an awesome time building a life with another person the next you're coming home to an uncooked dinner in a dirty house to not have sex with a woman who's spent her day scrolling on tiktok.

    • @quovadismurica1989
      @quovadismurica1989 15 днів тому

      Perhaps the way you automatically put all the blame on the woman is one of the reasons your sex life is such crap, hmm?

  • @mariamartinusz9699
    @mariamartinusz9699 16 днів тому

    So true

  • @obadijahparks
    @obadijahparks 19 днів тому +8

    Put in effort, continue to communicate, keep goals together, sacrifice, and love uh,... finds a way. (I say in voice of Jeff Goldblum.)

  • @butterflychaser4538
    @butterflychaser4538 15 днів тому +1

    I’m at a loss here. I have a super high libido and my husband doesn’t. Ideally I’d like sex 3 times a week minimum, but he usually only wants it once, twice if I’m lucky. I compliment him daily, both for his physique as well as his ability to provide for us so well. I give him affection with kisses, hugs, back scratches. I make sure he has a relaxing, enjoyable home to come to after work and a homemade hot meal every single night. I offer oral all the time. I keep myself up, workout 5 days a week, get my hair and nails done. I don’t know what to do if truly sex is what matters for men in keeping the relationship healthy, mine doesn’t seem that interested. I try to be a good wife but 🤷‍♀️I don’t know what to do at this point.

    • @jhamberg8968
      @jhamberg8968 10 днів тому +1

      Have him get his testosterone level checked. It could be low.

    • @butterflychaser4538
      @butterflychaser4538 3 дні тому

      @jhamberg8968 thanks for the suggestion. I broached that subject with him this week but he doesn’t want to get his testosterone levels tested. 🤷‍♀️

  • @Laissez_Faire
    @Laissez_Faire 16 днів тому

    A woman is willing to work three times harder in her job than on her husband. She’s three times more likely trying to impress her boss than her husband.

  • @DD23-1
    @DD23-1 17 днів тому +4

    He hates to say it but its the first thing that popped into his mind! I guess his Last Name sure does live up to his Character! If you dont see how wrong this is and his approach at all than I dont know what to say... Some things should be expressed with a bit more manners. Have some shame. These are private things and not everyone has these issues He might be experiencing in his Life. Btw he doesnt even give off the energy like he'd even want that from Women... Instead seems a bit fruity to me. Instead of Protecting Our Women in this World, talk like this and this kind of mindset wants to sexualize the Women instead. Nothing Godly about his approach and demeanor! Its kind of perverse tbh!

    • @quovadismurica1989
      @quovadismurica1989 15 днів тому

      Why am I not surprised to read a comment like this from someone who can’t even figure out how capitalization works 😂 Sorry to shock and offend you so, but yes, sex and the feeling of being desired are incredibly important to the success of marriage.

    • @DD23-1
      @DD23-1 15 днів тому

      @@quovadismurica1989 Good for you and I put Capitalization on the words I want the eye to catch cuz I put more Importance on em! I guess u know nothing about That! 😉😏

    • @Fiddleslip
      @Fiddleslip 15 днів тому

      This is protestant, puritan brainrot. Read 1 cor 7 and tell me that a marriage where one spouse chronically deprives the other is godly. According to St. Paul, such a marriage is actually at risk of being infiltrated by Satan. I mean think about it. Marriage is the earthly representation of the unity between Christ and his Church: can you imagine Christ denying his church, or his church denying Christ?
      Besides that, why are you speaking as if sex is evil or gross or immoral? God tells us to be fruitful and multiply. it is good and holy to unite together in the act of procreation. All in all, you need to grow up past the middle school stage where sex is dirty and boys have cooties.

  • @lilydauber3147
    @lilydauber3147 18 днів тому +2

    Ephesians 5:25-33
    25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her,
    26 that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word,
    27 so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish.
    28 In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.
    29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church,
    30 because we are members of his body.
    31 “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.”
    32 This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church.
    33 However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.

  • @emilytracy495
    @emilytracy495 5 днів тому

    This is such a sweet video

  • @jazzygirl904
    @jazzygirl904 8 днів тому +1

    I love this

  • @bruin4Christ
    @bruin4Christ 15 днів тому

    From the Gottman love lab:
    Men’s greatest complaint is that there’s too much arguing and too little sex.
    Woman’s greatest complaint is “he’s not there for me”

  • @youtube-user73424
    @youtube-user73424 18 днів тому

    Authors username checks out

  • @AmmonNelson
    @AmmonNelson 14 днів тому

    I think some people will be turned off by the "sex" comment. It's not about the "sex" for everyone, but it is about the "granola" and "little acts of kindness."

  • @agilemonk6305
    @agilemonk6305 6 днів тому

    Matt your perfect beard and hair have a few grey hairs floating around. 😂. Love you brother.

  • @Nitra813
    @Nitra813 15 днів тому

    I don’t believe it’s that simple. I believe people have different approaches to sex. Much like the 5 love languages there are different sex languages that need to be explored.
    Like mentioned in the video men will seek sex just for a release but not have a connection to those women.
    Whereas a woman will seek sex once they’ve built a deeper connection with. It’s a spectrum and not black and white.
    True Intimacy isn’t always acquired with sex. Likewise sex does not equate to love and that needs to be acknowledged when one spouse withdraws from a sexual experience.

  • @Aemirys
    @Aemirys 19 днів тому +3

    I need his book!

  • @Tracy-mu7kv
    @Tracy-mu7kv 19 днів тому +2

    This is the most logical and simple explanation for keeping a marriage in good shape. Excellent!!!!

  • @jluttjoh
    @jluttjoh 14 днів тому

    He ain't wrong

  • @dragpacktorino
    @dragpacktorino 19 днів тому +4

    Marriage, government licensed love enforced by a wealth transfer scheme. No, I don’t need a marriage license to love a woman. Nor does my dog need a pedigree. I lean towards never inviting the government into my personal matters. You can keep all that.

    • @v2807
      @v2807 18 днів тому

      So you just want to be married in the church?

  • @AndreiCostache-kh9mv
    @AndreiCostache-kh9mv 17 днів тому

    bro got ratioed

  • @ivanica05
    @ivanica05 18 днів тому

    Dear Matt, I think you would find interesting the fact that a humble ,God loving and fan favorite Eurovision contestant (Croatia) lost to a non-binary person by jury votes.

  • @siyabonganqayana
    @siyabonganqayana 15 днів тому

    Families that stay in love are the ones that have the honey but only publicly, watch anything, like teasing each other about their ex because they have met the guy or woman in that way there's no thinking ahead or back it's just this person you decided to spend your life with

  • @migy5031
    @migy5031 18 днів тому

    As a man, I don’t care for granola - but I like the other thing.

  • @valeriesearles3000
    @valeriesearles3000 15 днів тому

    Respect your husband
    Be intimate with your husband
    Cook for your husband

  • @M_C_O.G73
    @M_C_O.G73 16 днів тому

    You don't bring IN the trash

  • @mattgregory647
    @mattgregory647 18 днів тому +6

    Is this a joke?

  • @Agape122
    @Agape122 18 днів тому

    But I guess there are exceptions like when you are very pregnant, or after giving birth.

  • @whitneyp1317
    @whitneyp1317 17 днів тому

    The way he says each is officially an ick. 🤐 each sir not itch. lol
    I’m just playing though he’s fine pronouncing it however he pleases. lol

  • @siyabonganqayana
    @siyabonganqayana 15 днів тому

    If you have had thought about yourself being a woman you would not think sex is unity but self-centered selfish and full of it whatever it is,if you keep the childish honey honey when you are talking it's the gate to showing that you just liked that interaction like you like the same shows and when something goes wrong there's no honey or when there's nothing to watch it's like there is no love but carrying on because it's cold out there I mean it's not easy to start afresh with me even though I would have heard of her having an affair before we met I still, like even before she felt that I love her, would like to see someone saying loves her maybe that is why I love her every minute I can say and it's easy like having a conversation

  • @halfcentury1112
    @halfcentury1112 10 днів тому

    SEX - next question.......

  • @kurtpunchesthings2411
    @kurtpunchesthings2411 19 днів тому +5

    you know i gotta say the Granola story was wow yea its sad in the sense of
    this woman complained about her husband stopped doing that yea it sucks
    i honestly wonder if she ever considered is there something he enjoys that i stopped doing
    before James here outright mentioned it
    just saying for the ladies is even half an hour every week really too much