Honestly he could just go with truck nuts for all 4 classes. The Mage guy can have two healing crystals from Goop magazine and bam, cross platform promotional material.
Please keep leaning hard into the weirdness like this, it's exactly the kind of thing I want from Polygon and something that has felt all too scarce for most of the past year
As a newer viewer though i was a bit disappointed because I was ready for serious talks on how to make designs memorable whilst parodying how safe many modern designs are
There are people who don't want to find a graceful feminine figure surrounded by a gore nest of her own creation alluring. Unfortunately for them, Warframe doesn't care what they want.
i for one, wholeheartedly agree with the deliciously firm ass of Mesa Prime swinging around as I fire off my Peacemaker ult into a horde of ravaging Infested.
To this very day, I still remember the four-katana-wielding long-necked green robot, the truck-nuts-swangin' behemoth, and the barefoot cowboy bot. Pat's reimaginings stuck like glue, and his point is still proven two and a half years later. The wispy blonde guy slips my memory tho. We can't always win
Whenever someone tells me about anthem I think of the trailer at e3 a couple of years ago where the entire time I was watching it I was trying to figure out which game it was a sequel of. I knew it had to be one, but I couldn't tell if Modern Warfare went into space, Halo got jetpacks, Destiny got more action, or Warframe got less. The game just feels so incredibly generic and I haven't heard anyone say anything about the game other than that they are going to play it.
I know you meant it as "Anthem is like if Destiny had more and Warframe had less action", but I am extremely fond of Anthem = Warframe, but less. Just in general.
yo i never thought about the truck nuts philosophy. making something so exaggerated or ridiculous that it stands out helps characters become memorable/iconic.
i mean yea, i cant think of a reason that i would remember anthem for, but if they had truck nuts then itd be like, oh yea! the game with the truck nuts! look at red dead 2, they gave those horses nut technology to make them shrink in the cold, rockstar didnt need to do that but they did and i will remember it for all times
I love how you described that using white male comedians. Because, look, as a person who's partially white and also a fan of some of the mentioned guys, I DO sometimes have a hard time remembering who's who amongst them just because of how saturated the comedy scene is with men who are white. They stop standing out. Just like generic human shaped mechs with bright colours stop standing out in anthem. Nothing's individually wrong with them being a human shaped mech with bright colours but once they're all together...which is which again? Such a clever way of describing it! Never would have thought of it myself!
Hello I saw that you are a polygon fan if you are interested you can join my instagram community (if you want) and by doing so you will have the opportunity to discover many things and at the same time make me progress so that I can realize my dream My instagram : @abdourazak03
Damnit Kojima did not *give* Raiden a shapely ass in MGS4, he already had one! Don't you see!!! The power (of a shapely ass) was within him the whole time. It's within us all
I know this is more or less a meme-y video but there really is truth to the underlying points he's making even if the points themselves end up in...interesting places lmao
agreed pat, archetypes aren’t inherently bad in storytelling but when you’re afraid to break the mold, we run the risk of creating generic science fiction stories with a lot of familiar visual elements in games.
7:49 i fully disagree; you stopped at about 10% david bowie's goblin king you should've gone up to 60% at least, preferably with bell bottom pants very tight around the crotch area
Agree that there are some strong Bowie vibes. Not sure if the mech needs tight jeans though. Unless it's clearly a mecha-crotch type situation (with an angular silhouette of course, ideally with glowing, runic inscriptions somewhere on the pants to communicate "magic") in which case I am not quite convinced, but maybe.
Evidence that Pat is 1000% correct is that I don’t know anything about anthem, and couldn’t tell you anything about their designs, but could after just one viewing, tell you all the details about Pat’s design
The pings in this video sound way too much like the ping sound in Slack and I thought my boss was DMing me for stuff. So this is the best horror movie of 2019 10/10
This is it. The perfect culmination of the two warring halves of Polygon video content, the peace child of the studious, academic, informative video game content videos, and the weird, unraveled, ever thirsty content that many love you guys for. A hard breakdown and visual analysis of a boring game, and a strong case for putting truck nutz on robots.
This is how you write a cohesive persuasive essay. Undergrad take notes. Also Pat might be my new favorite Polygon face bc he is knocking it out of the park lately
Speaking of defining characteristics, you and Brian both have hairstyles that swoop out real far on the right. I think that's just poor character design from Polygon /s Love you guys and all you do! Keep up the great work!
If you go over to Polygon Unarchived, one of the later streams of Brian's first Half-Life features Pat and Brian discussing this video, specifically the SNL Syndrome joke, and the fact that an earlier draft actually had a variation of the joke that included Pat and Brian. (I don't recall the exact stream offhand, I'm afraid.)
This game never really appealed to me, but I couldn't really put my finger on exactly why. I can now say with total confidence, the reason Anthem doesn't appeal to me is it's tragic lack of truck nuts.
This is a good critique. You say your point, but you also have fun with it and aren't unnecessarily aggressive about it. I'm a big BioWare fan, and there is nothing here that made me feel annoyed or anything like that. Just a solid (and funny) critique.
The problem with this video is that it assumes the viewer isn't on board with the idea from the beginning.
He had us at "truck nuts"
I couldn't agree more
yes
Nice avatar 👌
Honestly he could just go with truck nuts for all 4 classes. The Mage guy can have two healing crystals from Goop magazine and bam, cross platform promotional material.
the dissonance between what I thought this video would be about based on the title versus what it was ACTUALLY about whiplashed me into 2017
Make my brain go WHK-TSHH
Please stop the collision of the USS Fitzgerald
Somehow, the video was *exactly* what I was expecting...
Please keep leaning hard into the weirdness like this, it's exactly the kind of thing I want from Polygon and something that has felt all too scarce for most of the past year
Don't join his Instagram community. Instead, go make a sandwich and have a laugh at another video ☺
Weirdness is the truck nuts of youtube. Whoa!
As a newer viewer though i was a bit disappointed because I was ready for serious talks on how to make designs memorable whilst parodying how safe many modern designs are
Polygon: *no*
This video was much more thoughtful than I expected it to be
Its conclusions are inescapable
There is some genuine design philosophy to be learned from this video... which I was not prepared for. Truck nuts or not.
EndlessCampaign That’s why I love Polygon. I love learning and they make it funny and memorable.
perfectly accented by the classical music
@@DeathnoteBB yep bdg video about skyrim books tells alot about how to create lore
I was ready to find Pat guilty for thought crimes at the beginning but god damn it if he didn't state his case by the end.
I thought I was getting into a garbage fire, it turned into an actual good analysis of mediocre design.
why would you say something so controvertial yet so brave?
Why would you say something so controversial yet so objectively correct?
this video is The Definition of ‘controversial but brave’
This isn't even controversial. We all agree.
John Stevens Eric André
truck nuts
Only Patrick Gill has the balls to take on gaming’s toughest problems, because he buys them wholesale.
I need you to understand that this is why I'm subscribed
@@mehdidahalani ok now ive seen that youre just spamming it in the chat man.
Same here
@@CallMeAshen they deleted their comment lol
"make it uncomfortably sexy" This whole video is basically explaining Warframe!
There are people who don't want to find a graceful feminine figure surrounded by a gore nest of her own creation alluring.
Unfortunately for them, Warframe doesn't care what they want.
i for one, wholeheartedly agree with the deliciously firm ass of Mesa Prime swinging around as I fire off my Peacemaker ult into a horde of ravaging Infested.
Warframe is exactly what Anthem is trying and failing to be.
@@android19willpwn There are also a lot of people who are LITERALLY HITLER
@@android19willpwn are you describing Garuda, or Sayrn?
To this very day, I still remember the four-katana-wielding long-necked green robot, the truck-nuts-swangin' behemoth, and the barefoot cowboy bot. Pat's reimaginings stuck like glue, and his point is still proven two and a half years later. The wispy blonde guy slips my memory tho. We can't always win
Pat doing serious videos is such a trap
I'm so happy I participated in telling Pat he is the wisest gamer
Memories are indeed stored in the ass.
GALASSY BRAIN
and pee is stored in the balls
@@alexrhind8459 poo is stored in the peepee
I came for a truck nutz joke but actually found a thoughtful video essay on the essentials of game character design...and a truck nutz joke
In about a week EA will release the Trucknuts DLC so you can download the left and right nuts separately for $2.99 each.
@@SquishyProductions +50 to manliness
There's already a built in War Story if you can't always afford both.
Despite this video being a joke it actually brings up a lot of good points
you want robonuts?
@@Gamibe536 yes
You can use these rules on all characters i like, this is... scary. Not the sexy part, only a few characters have this trait.
@Apple Bloom imagine the horse in your profile but with a nut sack
It is female... I am not into that stuff @@BlueCrashFigurineHoldingWumpa And yes, i presumed a gender right now!
Hideo Kojima is the only man brave enough to tell the tale of the butts that won the Cold War.
I completely forgot that this game existed
It's bc there are no truck nuts
I couldn't, cause every single fucking video I watch has at least 2 Anthem ads
That's a lie
My old ps4 doesn't
Well, to your defense, it is not a good game.
“You’ll agree with me” is such a powerful phrase
Whenever someone tells me about anthem I think of the trailer at e3 a couple of years ago where the entire time I was watching it I was trying to figure out which game it was a sequel of. I knew it had to be one, but I couldn't tell if Modern Warfare went into space, Halo got jetpacks, Destiny got more action, or Warframe got less. The game just feels so incredibly generic and I haven't heard anyone say anything about the game other than that they are going to play it.
PREACH
Halo... got jetpacks... since Reach (and they somehow got lost in 1, 2, and 3.)
But Halo
got no
Truck Nuts.
while it's cool to have a sci fi looter shooter that goes for the mech route, the designs are so generic. they look like stock mech models
I know you meant it as "Anthem is like if Destiny had more and Warframe had less action", but I am extremely fond of Anthem = Warframe, but less. Just in general.
yeah, this is exactly why we need to put trucknuts there!!
yo i never thought about the truck nuts philosophy. making something so exaggerated or ridiculous that it stands out helps characters become memorable/iconic.
it's why the warframes from warframe are so memorable
they all look so weird and ridiculous
or the Tf2 characters.
i mean yea, i cant think of a reason that i would remember anthem for, but if they had truck nuts then itd be like, oh yea! the game with the truck nuts!
look at red dead 2, they gave those horses nut technology to make them shrink in the cold, rockstar didnt need to do that but they did and i will remember it for all times
first i thought it was just a joke, then i thought there was no way you'd convince me, and yet here we are... truly the wisest of gamers
I love how you described that using white male comedians. Because, look, as a person who's partially white and also a fan of some of the mentioned guys, I DO sometimes have a hard time remembering who's who amongst them just because of how saturated the comedy scene is with men who are white. They stop standing out.
Just like generic human shaped mechs with bright colours stop standing out in anthem. Nothing's individually wrong with them being a human shaped mech with bright colours but once they're all together...which is which again?
Such a clever way of describing it! Never would have thought of it myself!
Nothing makes me happier than pausing a video 30 secs in, rotating to portrait, giving a thumbs up, then back to landscape to continue.
The worst part of this whole thing is that Pat is correct.
"It's Helvetica" sweet typography burn 😂
Yup, they would be awesome to have, just swingin round in battle.
Hello I saw that you are a polygon fan if you are interested you can join my instagram community (if you want) and by doing so you will have the opportunity to discover many things and at the same time make me progress so that I can realize my dream
My instagram :
@abdourazak03
@@mehdidahalani thats promotion
@@mehdidahalani thats a nono
@Red Skill
Uhhm, piss off with your adverts.
@@mehdidahalani if I go and find there isnt an abhorrent amount of post showing truck nuts on mechas I'll report this ad ,,,,,
Educational, weird, hilarious. This is the Good Polygon Content TM.
This is the only kind of games journalism i can bring myself to care about anymore
Damnit Kojima did not *give* Raiden a shapely ass in MGS4, he already had one! Don't you see!!! The power (of a shapely ass) was within him the whole time. It's within us all
Pat has a point I forget Anthem exists all the time but i'll never forget about pat's truck nuts essay.
I know this is more or less a meme-y video but there really is truth to the underlying points he's making even if the points themselves end up in...interesting places lmao
The sudden realization that he just described what i like about the design of Warframes...
Hey Patrick, big fan, this video put my brain in a hell dumpster, which is a dumpster one would find in hell, and locked it.
Honestly, those final mech designs (with a little work) are honestly pretty amazing.
agreed pat, archetypes aren’t inherently bad in storytelling but when you’re afraid to break the mold, we run the risk of creating generic science fiction stories with a lot of familiar visual elements in games.
I love how this is absolutely ridiculous but actually makes a good point.
Also this video is definitely uncomfortably sexy.
Polygon is the only video game website worth looking at
Nothing says big, iconic, and uncomfortably sexy like New World Symphony
Or the Bach Violin Concerto in A minor
Cloud was a big dork who wasn't afraid to cross dress for justice
Ive always said that Snake and Big Boss are the only two characters in existence who can rock a mullet.
The new Storm alone should be enough of a selling point. I mean who wouldn't want to play a futuristic fps as David Bowie
"It needs truck nuts"
*They hated him because he spoke the truth*
I know the truck nuts were a good shocking joke, but the bare feet really caught me off guard in the best way
im screaming but you’re right
Whenever I feel down I'll rewatch pat's extreme essay videos
I was watching this in my living room and stood up and yelled, “PAT WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?”
Then I learned and I accept it
Full-time Mads Nicholson fan is the most perfect way to describe Kojima, that I have ever heard... Brilliant. 15/10
Deciding whether to use my work email to forward this to all the art directors I know is today's final boss.
it made me genuinely really happy when i realized my newest d&d character already follows the Three Lessons
7:49 i fully disagree; you stopped at about 10% david bowie's goblin king
you should've gone up to 60% at least, preferably with bell bottom pants very tight around the crotch area
Agree that there are some strong Bowie vibes. Not sure if the mech needs tight jeans though. Unless it's clearly a mecha-crotch type situation (with an angular silhouette of course, ideally with glowing, runic inscriptions somewhere on the pants to communicate "magic") in which case I am not quite convinced, but maybe.
@@MrSmitheroons ah yes, obviously the mecha-buldge would be non-negotiable, i just thought that went without saying
Evidence that Pat is 1000% correct is that I don’t know anything about anthem, and couldn’t tell you anything about their designs, but could after just one viewing, tell you all the details about Pat’s design
The pings in this video sound way too much like the ping sound in Slack and I thought my boss was DMing me for stuff. So this is the best horror movie of 2019 10/10
This is it. The perfect culmination of the two warring halves of Polygon video content, the peace child of the studious, academic, informative video game content videos, and the weird, unraveled, ever thirsty content that many love you guys for. A hard breakdown and visual analysis of a boring game, and a strong case for putting truck nutz on robots.
when you said "ballsy" in the description you weren't messing around.
PATRICK THIS IS SO GOOD. I'M SO GLAD TO SEE HIM DOING HIS OWN VIDEOS (I'm sorry if he's been doing them before and I just missed them)
As a Titan I can confirm, that a 80´s buissnes women is what we all strive to become
Congratulations, Pat. This video just surpassed Please Retweet for the honor of "Peak Pat." I sure hope you're proud.
These are actually some solid character design tips.
My mental picture of Anthem was Apex Legends when I clicked so you definitely have a point about the branding
I came here for the truck nuts
Pat's whole aesthetic is never quite knowing how much he's kidding, and it's great.
I just realised that all these points are fulfilled in warframe. Especially the sexy part. Yeah.
**two trucks plays eerily in the background**
this is one of the best videos polygon has ever made
This is still one of my favorite Polygon videos and it's kind of bitter knowing that so many people skipped past it because it wasn't Unraveled
I was already agreeing, when we got to Kojima I signed the petition and I don't even know what Anthem is
This is how you write a cohesive persuasive essay. Undergrad take notes.
Also Pat might be my new favorite Polygon face bc he is knocking it out of the park lately
One of Pat's coworkers should affix some Truck Nuts to his car and see how long it takes him to notice.
bold of you to assume Patrick has a car
Pat definitely doesn’t have a car. They should attach truck nuts to his actual human body.
Dylan Mohan I was thinking more like hanging from the waist of his pants. Like how furries in high school wear tails to school.
Dylan Mohan that’s the ticket!
I come to Polygon for real information disguised as click-bait, with genuinely good goofs along the way.
"make it uncomfortably sexy" surprised you didn't bring up the Warframes from Warframe
So glad there are still great videos like this that I haven't seen
Goddamnit I love you Patrick.
I was sold from the beginning but now I’m extra sold. I’m ready to attach truck nuts to all of my character designs thank you for showing me the light
Speaking of defining characteristics, you and Brian both have hairstyles that swoop out real far on the right. I think that's just poor character design from Polygon /s
Love you guys and all you do! Keep up the great work!
Pat is Brian's echo fighter
If you go over to Polygon Unarchived, one of the later streams of Brian's first Half-Life features Pat and Brian discussing this video, specifically the SNL Syndrome joke, and the fact that an earlier draft actually had a variation of the joke that included Pat and Brian. (I don't recall the exact stream offhand, I'm afraid.)
I was really hoping the end would just be them putting truck nuts on everything
This game never really appealed to me, but I couldn't really put my finger on exactly why. I can now say with total confidence, the reason Anthem doesn't appeal to me is it's tragic lack of truck nuts.
You turned that blue guy into David Bowie in The Labrynth.
Now this here? This is GOOD CONTENT.
Thank you for doing your part to immortalize Kojima's insatiable thirst for Mads Mikkleson
Ahh, finally the pay off for that "wisest gamer" tweet.
This worked too well because now i think of this video every time I'm reminded of anthem
PAT
One of your best videos yet. Loved the mix of funny and thoughtful, great work!
Pat Gill aka The Solomon of Games
this deserved the oscar for best editing, not bohemian rhapsody
This is a good critique. You say your point, but you also have fun with it and aren't unnecessarily aggressive about it. I'm a big BioWare fan, and there is nothing here that made me feel annoyed or anything like that. Just a solid (and funny) critique.
You are the most qualified and wisest gamer ever born
THE PAT WE KNOW AND LOVE IT BACK BABEY!
This video is such a perfect blend of Polygon's weird humor content, and Polygon's thoughtful game video essays and I'm deeply here for it.
how could you say something so controversial yet so brave
Big, iconic, and uncomfortably sexy are amazing criteria to live one's life by
pat i genuinely Hate that this video is Good
It's been so long since I last saw Pat on camera that I completely forgot how wise of a gamer he is.
honestly his redesign of the interceptor/rogue thing aint half bad
The most frustrating part is that you have a very good point
damn this guy got some ideas. is he running?
"The robots in Anthem should have balls'"
*checks video time length* about 8 minutes.
Ok Pat, I'll bite.