Is My Wife Withholding Intimacy?

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  • Опубліковано 21 гру 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 558

  • @wheeln00
    @wheeln00 Рік тому +338

    I became a quad at 19, married at 28, and my wife and I have been happily married for 25 years. We have 2 daughters, thanks to IVF. You 2 are a younger version of me and my wife. We both started with the love language of touch/affection and quality time. Over the years we have changed. She is definitely acts of service and quality time. I'm still a touchy/feely guy and acts of service. I know she likes it when I do what I can to help out. I'm the laundry guy at our house and she is the dish washer.🙂 I love watching you guys go through everything we have gone through. I really appreciate you sharing all that you do. Life isn't all fun and games, but it can be great with the right partner. We have 25 years of love, kids, travel, camping, and fun behind us and I hope for many more years to come. Keep posting and staaay positive.

    • @coleandcharisma
      @coleandcharisma  Рік тому +54

      Thank you so much for sharing your story and for watching! STAY POSITIVE 💙

    • @emmanuelndumba3876
      @emmanuelndumba3876 Рік тому +6

      How did you make your kids?
      I’m a quadriplegic too
      So badly want sons atleast 2

    • @Paradigmshift5727
      @Paradigmshift5727 Рік тому +6

      ​@@emmanuelndumba3876I think he mentioned IVF?

    • @PS-bs8oe
      @PS-bs8oe 10 місяців тому

      ​@@emmanuelndumba3876 They've made stories about eggharvesting and IVF. Let us hope for healthy children. One cannot ask for a daughter or a son in particular. But happiness always.

    • @NicoviaAnglin-z6p
      @NicoviaAnglin-z6p 8 місяців тому +3

      I LOVE THIS COMMENT....'it can be great with that person.' You guys make me believe that one day I will meet the love of my life...many more beautiful years to your 25 years of marriage

  • @babypinkrose73
    @babypinkrose73 Рік тому +155

    Anyone who thinks these two are intimacy deprived doesn't have eyes.The way they treat each other .,how they speak to each other is so special .Let them be happy please

    • @coleandcharisma
      @coleandcharisma  Рік тому +17

      Thank you!! 💯💙

    • @michellebrooks8243
      @michellebrooks8243 Рік тому +2

      I am not stopping their happiness..it is juat what I see.

    • @tonitwitty9529
      @tonitwitty9529 Місяць тому +2

      Ppl are so judgmental it's sickening. She's there and supports her husband yet ppl look and judge. All I see is love. My goodness, she shows her love by doing for him. U just can't please some ppl and it's sad. He's happy yet outsiders have the audacity to complain 🤦🏾‍♀️

    • @SenñoraFGOfficial
      @SenñoraFGOfficial Місяць тому

      ⁠I agree ❤

  • @pattituron8510
    @pattituron8510 Рік тому +253

    I think of the two of you as being very affectionate with one another for being on camera. My goodness, what do people expect? And where do they get off being critical? All I ever think of when I watch your videos is how loving and caring you are to one another. I think you are both very authentic and you are obviously very much in love. Sad to me that there are way too many mean spirited people in our society. Be kind, people... If people can't say something nice, they should say NOTHING.

    • @kavitadeva
      @kavitadeva Рік тому +6

      I liked your comment. The only part I disagree with is, If you don't have anything nice to say don't say anything at all. That is something that rings absolutely Phony to me or disingenuous. Sometimes if you share something that is difficult to hear but you hang in there with the other person and you both dig deeper, Then things don't always have to be nice or easy. I believe sometimes through difficulties and hard things to hear we grow way more intimate with people we love. I hope that makes sense. ❤

    • @schandrikawilliams2792
      @schandrikawilliams2792 Рік тому +7

      Yeah! What do they want to see on camera!? Ugh

    • @Usapatriette
      @Usapatriette Рік тому +3

      I think Cole and Charisma pretty much hit the right balance on UA-cam and I would not expect them, or would even want them to share private physical intimacy on camera. Also, it is only natural that they, like anybody else, have arguments and disagreements that don't need to be revealed to the audience. But since they are putting themselves out there for public consumption, I think that the audience should be able to express disagreement without being called a “hater” or “unkind” and be able to discern a simple disagreement from a hateful, unkind comment. UA-camrs should not expect every single person in the audience to only say things that are always favorable and complimentary, as much as we all would like to be seen in that light. That's just not realistic, because none of us are perfect or above criticism or disagreement.

    • @kelelithabane2849
      @kelelithabane2849 Рік тому +1

      Sooooooo true!! Love you guys❤❤

    • @hopeanozie5842
      @hopeanozie5842 Рік тому +1

      ​@@UsapatrietteYou're right. I think that Cole and Charisma are handling the criticism well. Don't they have hard feeling. Instead it gives them something to talk about in their next video. 😅

  • @suzandobreuenaski8134
    @suzandobreuenaski8134 Рік тому +71

    I have no idea what those “people” are talking about because I see the affection between the two of you all of the time. Ignore the haters!!

    • @taylor3950
      @taylor3950 Рік тому +8

      Yeah it’s wild. Charisma is just obviously more reserved on camera but like come on

    • @jaeshasway
      @jaeshasway Рік тому +7

      Right! I’ve been here since the beginning and never noticed anything but love between them. Sometimes people just want to criticize for the sake of criticizing.

  • @CharGC123
    @CharGC123 Рік тому +53

    I think the #1 primary issue for any and all relationships is good communication... which you guys model beautifully!!!

  • @paulinejane9742
    @paulinejane9742 Рік тому +19

    What you said Charisma struck a cord with me. I’m a RN & midwife in the UK. Women in labour seem to hate superficial touch but like solid touch, so being held or massages they love but stroked….absolutely not lol.
    I’ve been married for 32 years and definitely my love languages are words of affirmation & gifts. My husband’s are acts of service & words of affirmation. Strangely physical touch isn’t massively needed after 32 years (definitely in the early days it was a BIG thing lol)
    And when our boys were babies I was very overwhelmed by touch. “Get off me” lol 😂
    You two are such an inspiration and your love for each other is plain to see. If anyone can’t see that well hey ho lol 💖💙xxx

  • @jaylene.turner6524
    @jaylene.turner6524 Рік тому +131

    Ok.
    Some of these people are
    asking stupid questions.
    Why do some people think we’re
    some type of species because
    of our special needs?
    We can do whatever we want,
    but just in a different way.
    I see we can function better than
    “normal people” who have nothing
    physically wrong with them.
    I apologize for my rant,
    but it just needs to be said.

    • @lettiegrant9447
      @lettiegrant9447 Рік тому +10

      I'm glad you said it. Somebody needed to say it..👍👍

    • @kavitadeva
      @kavitadeva Рік тому +2

      Hi. I read your comment a few times, however I was not sure what your point is. If you feel like it, can you explain your comment. Thanks.

    • @jaylene.turner6524
      @jaylene.turner6524 Рік тому +3

      @@kavitadeva
      I was saying that some people asks
      stupid questions like the title of
      the video,and about how
      (special needs people)
      do certain things in our lives,
      and it’s not right.
      It’s nobody’s business.
      That’s what I was saying.

    • @DReid-ry9ff
      @DReid-ry9ff Рік тому +1

      You are 💯 accurate

    • @ngozidiachi
      @ngozidiachi Рік тому +1

      You're damn right Sir

  • @lettiegrant9447
    @lettiegrant9447 Рік тому +57

    People are ridiculous. They need to worry about their own lives than Charisma and Cole's. It's none of their business about every part of their lives. Charisma you and Cole show in every video how much you love each other and you're both affectionate. You don't owe a bunch of strangers every part of your lives. It's your life not theirs.😊

  • @LoriWatson11
    @LoriWatson11 Рік тому +22

    Things change over time. Been married 20 years. I hated to be touched when my kids were little and now I don’t mind it. My husband loves physical touch and attention and I’ve had to be more intentional with that. I think open honest communication is key to a healthy happy relationship! You guys are awesome. This was a great discussion. ❤

  • @CharM.E
    @CharM.E Рік тому +13

    It's so funny how people judge you... I've been watching for years and always think that you've become more comfortable showing appropriate levels of intimacy in your vlogs compared to years ago. Some people are too nosey! Love you both!

  • @tarnisaperkins6970
    @tarnisaperkins6970 Рік тому +14

    So ridiculous people thinking the two of you don’t show love and affection. Watching and listening to the two of you is inspiring and gives hope. The way you look at each other and speak to one another all the while going through extremely difficult situations. Love you both and thank you for being adult husband and wifey role models.❤❤

  • @janicevance6981
    @janicevance6981 9 місяців тому +3

    You two are the most beautiful couple! I just love how you look at each other with so much love

  • @user-xm5le5ok2r
    @user-xm5le5ok2r Рік тому +67

    Who care what people thinks. As long as you are happy that’s all that’s matter.
    Always thought you all are a beautiful couple.
    Also, thanks for being real with us!

  • @martybob55
    @martybob55 Рік тому +8

    Cole and Charisma, y’all are very courageous and open on your channel. My husband and I just celebrated 40 year anniversary! Having depression and multiple sclerosis for the past 20 years.. I am so blessed to still say we love each other deeply. Unfortunately with my depression and previous sexual trauma(s).. I have realized that a look, hand holding, knees touching and a gentle kiss..help get us through our days together. Physical intimacy can be something as simple as spending time together…. Thank you for helping us explore this topic. As I helped care for my mom with Alzheimers disease… I made sure I stroked her arm, hand, back or face.. and not just with a wash cloth. When a love partner has a physical or medical or psychological issue.. sometimes you have to get creative in how you express or experience love. Just knowing that Cole or Charisma choose to spend quality time together is a blessing and kindling for the fire that glows within your relationship. Thank you for sharing your journey with us.

  • @WISDOMSTRENGTHDISCIPLINE
    @WISDOMSTRENGTHDISCIPLINE Рік тому +1

    I broke my neck in 1979, i was 17. Wow it is been 45 years ago. I still have moments when i can't help but wonder what my life would have been without my injury. Looking back on all that i have accomplished since my injury and all the wonderful moments i have experienced I find it hard to believe that i could have done more even though had to do it with a body that made everything more difficult. I too was an athlete and i miss waxing my buddies on the basketball floor or running down a beach in my bare feet in the sand. Ultimately i have learned these are not the experiences that define us. They simply enhance this life experience.
    Your bravery and courage is off the charts. You have made me a little ashamed of myself because i could never do what you do. I could never film my struggles and share it with the world. In fact i never talk about it except with my closes friends. When you are in your 60's and you are looking back on your life and your babies have babies and you think about all the wonderful things you have experienced and accomplished in your life you will see that these things you mourn over Ultimately just were not that important. You will be an amazing father and a wonderful example of what a real man really is. You will pass your courage and strength to your children and they too will be amazing. I wish i could meet them. YOU ARE A MONSTER MY FRIEND YOU ARE HUGE AND YOUR INJURY WILL NEVER CHANGE THAT. BE BLESSED !! Charisma you are a beautiful and charming he is lucky to have you. my girl is a planner as well it is a wonderful quality..

  • @nereydacamargodetriana3250
    @nereydacamargodetriana3250 Рік тому +67

    No hablo nada de English.
    Pero leo las traducciones y mas o menos me informo.
    Llevo algun tiempo de seguirlos,me encantan como son,todo lo que han logrado juntos. Y siento mucho amor entre ustedes dos. Ademas de tener cada uno unos padres que los apoyan siempre. Saludos desde Panamá 🇵🇦 💕💕

    • @suzzieq1914
      @suzzieq1914 Рік тому +9

      Muchos saludos para ti también. Ten un hermoso día

    • @sambito702
      @sambito702 Рік тому +6

      Saludos de Chicago, USA!

    • @lurodriguez1836
      @lurodriguez1836 Рік тому +3

      Cole y Charisma tienen un diálogo muy abierto y sano. Los admiro, tan sabios en su juventud. Saludos en español gente 🙋🏻‍♀️

    • @nilvaalves7816
      @nilvaalves7816 Рік тому +1

      Gostaria que fosse traduzir pelo menos os comentários pra jente entender omo muito esse casal. Ribeirão Preto SP 🇧🇷

  • @SharronLPope
    @SharronLPope Рік тому +12

    I have been married thirty one yrs and I think your love language changes as your life changes. You both are doing really well to give attention to that. It keeps you both tuned into each other.

    • @snsn7251
      @snsn7251 Рік тому

      Absolutely correct.

    • @LuziaSilvaMagalhaesOrest-pe2yx
      @LuziaSilvaMagalhaesOrest-pe2yx 6 місяців тому

      Gente basta ver as familias amorosas deles e uma bençao pra nos esses dois nos fazem feliz a vida e feita de momentos felizes todos os vlogs deles faz isso com a gente tem seguidor que tem dores mas tem o sorriso no rosto muitas atitudes instrutivas por parte deles eles estao juntos por Deus cade a reforma intima que cada um de nos devemos ter

  • @elaibesummers906
    @elaibesummers906 Рік тому +2

    When people are sad and lonely they seek to make comments that they feel will upset people, who everyone can see clearly are happy and affectionate together, as well as having great communication skills together. Forget the jealous people. Stay blessed beautiful couple. 💜

  • @maetay1256
    @maetay1256 Рік тому +5

    I'm not a person who likes to be touched often, especially in public. I have sensory issues and am a SA survivor so touch does not always feel good to me. It has been a learning curve for my husband and myself because he does prefer physical touch. I have learned to communicate when I am comfortable or not comfortable being touched and he has learned to ask before touching me because he knows that it can be a trigger. It's sad that people don't understand that love can be expressed and received in different ways or that they would assume you don't love your spouse because you don't touch them. You all are a young couple who I've watched grow together and your relationship is beautiful. I pray that God continues to bless you both❤❤

  • @patriciarobinson5172
    @patriciarobinson5172 Рік тому +11

    20 mins or so of a video should never assume that you guys aren’t loving each other 😊😊

  • @kdcbattlecreek
    @kdcbattlecreek Рік тому +4

    You two get along so well. You really seem well matched. It's great that you talk about some of the things you've had to grow in and needs that have changed.

  • @CristinaRivas-y6v
    @CristinaRivas-y6v Рік тому +7

    I don’t know who says you guys don’t show each other love! I see that constantly on both ends! ❤

  • @geraldinepfeiff2016
    @geraldinepfeiff2016 Рік тому +3

    You learn to love your mate in many different ways
    You too seem so happy together

  • @ceciliap5336
    @ceciliap5336 Рік тому +6

    i seriously love you guys, my comfort internet couple! ❤

  • @monalisa542
    @monalisa542 Рік тому +293

    Intimacy is between two people-not two people and the world. Keep your intimate moments private despite what folks say.

    • @melbaalexander9475
      @melbaalexander9475 Рік тому +6

      Amen

    • @lindandaba525
      @lindandaba525 Рік тому +2

      2nd

    • @debbiejames3096
      @debbiejames3096 Рік тому +8

      Well said. I have seen this with other interabled couples on youtube, they all seem to want to talk about their sex life.

    • @sammithornton1224
      @sammithornton1224 Рік тому +1

      amen sister hen @monalisa542

    • @mofimTV
      @mofimTV Рік тому +3

      Yes. I think at some point they are so used to this reality TV they forgot to keep anything intimate or private.

  • @annyetta890
    @annyetta890 Рік тому +47

    I'm not a fan of being touched by most people or by anyone at all when I'm overwhelmed or overstimulated. Parenthood has definitely overtaxed my system on many days. The infant stage wasn't usually overwhelming as far as being touched out, but the toddler stage was very difficult.

    • @ilonacrooks5899
      @ilonacrooks5899 Рік тому +4

      My daughter has 5 children aged 18, 10, 8, 5 and 2 and she is very affectionate and loving to all of them..

    • @Lady.Fern.
      @Lady.Fern. Рік тому +4

      @@ilonacrooks5899what a rude remark. Feeling touched out or overstimulated does not mean someone doesn’t love their child or loves them any less than someone who’s love language is physical touch.

    • @ilonacrooks5899
      @ilonacrooks5899 Рік тому +1

      @@Lady.Fern. perhaps I have experienced love and affection all my life from loving parents and siblings..you on the other hand may have experienced these things differently..it's not rude it's just speaking my true..you obviously seem very defencive about the subject..that triggers red flags to me..everyone is different, it's about excepting but still speaking your truth.

    • @Lady.Fern.
      @Lady.Fern. Рік тому +8

      @@ilonacrooks5899 honey, your remark was rude and that is all there is to it. A little life tip, when someone is calling you out on your ish instead of trying to make up a story line just accept it was a crummy comment to leave someone who was expressing vulnerability, apologize and move along , it’s really that simple.

    • @wendyandrews8229
      @wendyandrews8229 8 місяців тому

      Why is her comment rude? It was just a statement, not an attack.

  • @hippychick_peace
    @hippychick_peace Рік тому +3

    I have never ever doubted the love you have for each other and I love you both! My husband and I show love very differently and I've learned to be more like him and he sometimes is more like me. But, we'll never be the same! He's not too much into gifts but always finds ways to make my life easier with acts of service. I learned to be less upset about not receiving a gift and concentrate on what he does for me on the daily. I am loved, for sure.

  • @haleyreinecke7740
    @haleyreinecke7740 Рік тому +12

    My top love language has always been physical touch. My husband and I were always super touchy while dating and when first married, but once I got pregnant my hormones made it so that I didn’t want as much touch from him. After the baby as well, I definitely felt like I would get most of the physical touch I needed from the baby and didn’t want as much from my husband. Although I can relate with wanting to be held solidly, rather than a lot of repetitive touch. It’s very interesting how things can change like that!

  • @MariniFacey
    @MariniFacey Рік тому +15

    This is absolutely amazing and such a positive way to bring perspective to others who are having difficulty understanding where y'all are coming from. Omg, how cute about PDA. Hahahaha I'm still watching.

  • @ruthc2468
    @ruthc2468 Рік тому +3

    I watched Cole and Charisma from the beginning if their relationship. I observe so much growth and confidence in their relationship. Well done

  • @chellebelle4296
    @chellebelle4296 Рік тому +11

    Remember also how you receive love can be different to how you give. Have you looked at the languages of apology?

    • @coleandcharisma
      @coleandcharisma  Рік тому +9

      Oooo we’ve never heard for that! We will definitely look into it

  • @Lippymama
    @Lippymama Рік тому +4

    I used to like physical touch from my hubby.... pre-baby!!
    I definitely felt very "touched out" during the baby & toddler years. Now my daughter is 5 and in school, and the need for my husband's physical touch is slowly coming back.
    It's so great that you guys are talking about it now, before having kids. It's something my husband & I didn't talk about... not even sure I knew the phrase "love language" at that time.

  • @ivykaneshiro7554
    @ivykaneshiro7554 Рік тому +1

    You both have a true love of ACCEPTING for your actions towards each other…and most of all being ACCEPTED by both your families…this makes life EASIER to understand and ACCEPT you both without hesitation…you both have the most remarkable and understanding families…they always willing to Help you out❤❤❤❤

  • @QueenEstherfaithful
    @QueenEstherfaithful Рік тому +1

    THIS IS NEEDED! YOU BOTH HELP ME TO LOOK BEYOND MYSELF. THANK YOU AND GOD BLESS YOU ALWAYS.

  • @kailashbedi3404
    @kailashbedi3404 Рік тому +2

    THAT was a LOVELY conversation and feature! Stay blessed and happy ALWAYS! 💕🌷🙏🏼🌷💕

  • @charliebetter969
    @charliebetter969 Рік тому +5

    You guys are awesome. Thank you for being open. Thank you for not letting some of these nosy, self righteous, know it all people not affect your relationship.
    I love quality time and acts of service.
    Love you guys❤

  • @Lola-iv5ut
    @Lola-iv5ut Рік тому +2

    You guys are both the best! Thanks for the transparency. I love this advice...Give your spouse what they need at the time, and it may change day to day or year to year.

  • @pdias8469
    @pdias8469 Рік тому +2

    Cole and Charisma you two are inspirational human beings. My husband and I always held hands. Everywhere we went we always held hands. Love language will change now and then, but the initial holding hands will never go away. The main thing is never take each for granted, because it can become a habit. Anyways I love you two. Be blessed always.

  • @karenkennedy9874
    @karenkennedy9874 Рік тому +4

    You both are an inspiration to us all no matter how old or young. You’ve brightened my life. My husband and I celebrated our 40th wedding anniversary this past April and we’ve weathered many storms but it’s been worth it ♥️♥️. I’m so happy for you both ♥️♥️

  • @autism_momma_LosAngeles
    @autism_momma_LosAngeles Рік тому

    I love the way the wording of these tasks make so much more sense than making these things sound like "chores". I really love how great you two are able to share so much

  • @dionysiapalmer3945
    @dionysiapalmer3945 Рік тому +6

    We're at 49 yrs married. Never heard of Languages of love!! My husband i s a gem so i must be an ok gem of a wife !!! We just know about it without analysing it. We arent big on gifts but do little " supri ses" instead. But getting the engagement ring was a big deal !! ( but the occasion of receiving i t was lack lustre..i do bring it up still... my husband is a rare man indeed and so kind

    • @donnashaffer527
      @donnashaffer527 Рік тому +1

      I love this. You're obviously doing something right?

  • @Maguire708Julie
    @Maguire708Julie Рік тому +26

    Babies/kids are touch overload, even for touchy people!

    • @coleandcharisma
      @coleandcharisma  Рік тому +12

      Wow! We didn’t know this. Good to know!

    • @jillnurse
      @jillnurse Рік тому +3

      @@coleandcharismayes. I breastfed twins a long time with no problem. When I nursed my last baby I was so touched out by 16 months. I had to wean him.😢

    • @qp9857
      @qp9857 Рік тому +4

      Yes definitely! My daughter is touchy feely and it took me years to suck my feelings to the side and just hold her. My mom wasn't so I wasn't so much but my daughter is and it was definitely a learning curve because kids definitely don't understand they just feel like you don't love them and I definitely didn't want that.
      Plus physical touch for a newborn helps there brain grow. Look it up.

    • @Maguire708Julie
      @Maguire708Julie Рік тому

      @@qp9857exactly! Luckily my youngest (of 3) is self aware enough about her need for touch that even as a wee one she could say “I didn’t get enough hugs today” and instigate a family “puppy pile” some afternoons when her touched-out mama (me) wasn’t enthusiastic about being climbed on!

  • @johneckels12
    @johneckels12 Рік тому +3

    Both of you seem happy together and I love it

  • @jenniferbradshaw6025
    @jenniferbradshaw6025 Рік тому +11

    Love the conversation. Both of you are a delight.

  • @bevl7989
    @bevl7989 Рік тому +1

    Everyone knows you love your husband…BEAUTIFUL COUPLE continue praying for you guys🙏

  • @EmpressChernobyl
    @EmpressChernobyl Рік тому +167

    I’ve always thought that what you two show us is nothing but love. The way yall stare at each other sometimes makes me feel like I’m being intrusive 😂❤️
    Let me pay attention and take notes

    • @coleandcharisma
      @coleandcharisma  Рік тому +25

      Aw thank you! 🥰

    • @schandrikawilliams2792
      @schandrikawilliams2792 Рік тому +7

      @@coleandcharisma Hey Cole and Charisma! I love you both just the way you are! Don’t change for the silliness ❤

    • @ehenry484
      @ehenry484 7 місяців тому

      Those people who have a problem with you two.
      HAS TO BE BLIND OR DON'T KNOW WHAT TRUE LOVE IS
      Because the way he makes love to her with his eyes.
      And the way she responds with her looks and smiles.
      I sometimes think their vlog should be rated "sexy or PG.
      Because I sometimes think someone could have an orgasm by just looking at them.
      THEY ARE VERY MUCH IN LOVE 😘💗

  • @bettinacarter8123
    @bettinacarter8123 Рік тому +1

    This is great you two are discussing this important issue in a marriage. remember communication is the key to a great marriage. I'm proud of you two. Good job

  • @maureennyandoro7834
    @maureennyandoro7834 Рік тому +2

    You can see they love each other unconditionally. ❤️❤️

  • @ugonnatalitha868
    @ugonnatalitha868 Рік тому +1

    Beautiful couple thank you for sharing your love language.
    People don't know what is unconditional love that's why they don't understand your relationship.
    May God continue Blessing your Union 🙏🏼 ❤️ 😘 💕

  • @Abysalss
    @Abysalss Рік тому +2

    Just discovered this channel and I don’t understand how anyone could see this as anything but a loving relationship

  • @michelleb6363
    @michelleb6363 Рік тому +1

    I also, became overwhelmed by touch, but I think when you know the reason you feel turned off or overwhelmed by your hubbies touch, it helps him to not be offended or hurt by your reaction or feelings. I also had to make time just for him. This is where the help from family and friends came in because they would help with the baby and allow our time for each other to thrive. Which really is for most important. When mommy and daddy are happy with each other, the children will feel happy and secure. ❤❤❤

  • @loriefuller9928
    @loriefuller9928 Рік тому +2

    You guys are always so genuine its not always peaches and cream but talking things out and making it work is what counts I truly loved this ❤️♥️

  • @Bunnyness
    @Bunnyness Рік тому +28

    After I had my baby son, sometimes I felt overly "pulled on." Physical touch from my husband was too much, though I loved him dearly, because the baby pulled on me so much. I was recovering from a C-section, I was in great pain constantly, I was breast feeding, and I got little to no sleep.

    • @NicoviaAnglin-z6p
      @NicoviaAnglin-z6p 8 місяців тому +1

      Sending love bunnyness...I know this feeling...though I'm a single Mom
      ...my heart goes out to you.

    • @NicoviaAnglin-z6p
      @NicoviaAnglin-z6p 8 місяців тому +1

      I love Charisma & Cole

  • @CarbonFiberSwan
    @CarbonFiberSwan Рік тому +3

    The love languages are interesting. I think they are a great foundation for understanding the differences in the ways we give and receive love, but as y’all broke down so well, they can change or be different between people.
    My top 2 for receiving love are quality time and physical touch. Those have stayed the same for a while. But the ways I show love change, and are different for different people. I have a strong sense of empathy, and I try to be aware of the ways people seem to respond the most positively, and love them in those ways.

  • @dnoray1
    @dnoray1 Рік тому +5

    New learning for me , I didn’t know there was a definition for love. For me remembering by birthdays saying thank you is all that matters for me. But thank you for sharing with us the underlying meaning of love-:))💕👍😊

  • @cherrymetha3185
    @cherrymetha3185 Рік тому +23

    I must admit I don’t really understand analysing the language of love . I believe it’s more of an American thing ! Us Brits are more simple . We just love someone ( or we don’t) and that’s it ! You’re a pretty couple ! 🥰

    • @coleandcharisma
      @coleandcharisma  Рік тому +16

      Everyone loves differently! As long as people feel loved, that’s all that matters. But it is fun to dive deeper sometimes

    • @cherrymetha3185
      @cherrymetha3185 Рік тому +3

      @@coleandcharisma I believe love is a universal language . I think it’s a very primal instinct to love someone and to want to be loved .And of course there are different types of love but the essence of it is still the same . You’re right it’s important to know that you’re loved 🥰.

  • @roseiam
    @roseiam Рік тому +1

    I've always loved the concept of love languages. I read the book about 10 years ago. Good stuff.

  • @tashalaing823
    @tashalaing823 Рік тому

    Charisma is such a wonderful , beautiful person. There is no question that you love Cole. Keep loving each other guys. To love and be loved is such a gift

  • @britt9244
    @britt9244 Рік тому +1

    I know in my relationship whatever we felt in the beginning and no matter how many times our love language changed over the years, eventually each one slowly faded away to the point that there wasn’t any left. Touch changed to not even wanting to sit next to each other, words of affirmation changed to silence, acts of service changed to only doing it for yourself.. etc.. now in the middle of a divorce I see how much we slowly gave up. All started with not trying to understand each others love language and realizing the fact that it constantly changes over time. Keep communicating your changes! ❤️

  • @kavitadeva
    @kavitadeva Рік тому +3

    This was a great Video. I love getting to know you two on a deeper level. I think what ever ones love language is, the biggest thing is being able to share hard things together. When both people are committed to being there for what comes up, and not running away from finding resolution, then all things draw you closer together.
    Thanks for sharing some very cool things
    from the heart.

  • @GreenerGenesisWondersOfNature
    @GreenerGenesisWondersOfNature Місяць тому +1

    Just discover your channel. Been watching your video and loved your 5 love languages… I have written them down on my diary today 13 November 2024! Thank you algorithm for showing me this beautiful young couple. Hope more young couples and individuals looking for a soul mate would get hold of this awesome channel❤❤❤

  • @13271969
    @13271969 Рік тому +1

    I like how you describe that people who are all touched out meaning they don’t want to be touched by anyone else today. Don’t like to be tapped on and poked on but a good solid hug is something totally different because it feels like you’re being cared for and not pulled and tugged on, I get that, but I was never able to explain it like that ,not even to myself, but there is a term for that it’s called being all touched out you just don’t want to be bothered but yes, maybe you just need to be held and comforted. Thanks.

  • @mikki_s1100
    @mikki_s1100 Рік тому +32

    It’s always just avbit wild to me that people just assume these things based on videos we see. Y’all are both grown and if Cole felt he wasn’t getting the affection he needed, he’d talk with charisma about it. Great video, love the discussion about how love languages can change over time, I don’t see people talk about that as often when talking about love languages!

  • @crystalwaters4445
    @crystalwaters4445 Рік тому +174

    I think Charisma likes to verbalize her emotions. Cole does too but Cole is a Taurus and they are more touchy. Charisma likes mental stimulation. Pisces are more humanitarians and feel sympathy.

    • @coleandcharisma
      @coleandcharisma  Рік тому +35

      We agree!

    • @michapeachgrl
      @michapeachgrl Рік тому +26

      She’s a Pisces?? Ayeee the best!

    • @powergirl7619
      @powergirl7619 Рік тому +1

      YES THEY ARE AND I AM A PISCIES I LOVE HARD BUT MY HUSBAND IS VERY TOUCHY IN PUBLIC VERY BAD 17YEARS LOL.

    • @kimbermichelle3922
      @kimbermichelle3922 Рік тому +29

      Nothing to do with zodiac signs.😊

    • @powergirl7619
      @powergirl7619 Рік тому +10

      I DON'T LIKE SIGNS , BUT WE SURE DO ACT LIKE THEM. LOL . MY HUSBAND APRIL 28. WE MET SOMEONE WITH THAT SAME BIRTHDAY HE ACT LIKE MY HUSBAND. I AM IN MARCH. I LOVE TO LOOK AND FEEL LIKE A WOMAN GIRLY SOMETIMES ,BUT CAN REALLY BE A TOUGH TOMBOY. I ALSO LOVE ME SOME JESUS. JUST THAT YOU ARE AMAZED WHEN YOU FIND OUT A PERSON WHO HAS YOUR BIRTHDAY OR LOVE ONE ACTS LIKE YOU. OH YEAH I JUST LIKE TYPING IS CAPS. NO HARD FEELINGS🥰

  • @chercher1096
    @chercher1096 Рік тому +1

    I truly appreciate your honesty. May the Lord continue to bless and keep you. You guys are an inspiration to me🎉

  • @tonitwitty9529
    @tonitwitty9529 Місяць тому +1

    All that she does for her husband and ppl have the nerve to criticize and say the assistant will take him. She shows him love by her actions and being there for her husband. I wish them well.
    Oh, Cole, that picture frame u made is beautiful.

  • @luckyxaba3014
    @luckyxaba3014 Рік тому

    I love the way you love each other, guys. You have so much love for each other, anyone not seeing that just doesn't want to see it

  • @elizabethharttley4073
    @elizabethharttley4073 Рік тому +4

    Brilliant to recognize your love language differences and share with us. It behooves couples to know this.
    I admit when cole use to slap charismas butt i was annoyed for her. That laying claim was almost enough to abandon the channel. The strong communication between you two was what kept me coming back.

  • @SunshineInCA14
    @SunshineInCA14 Рік тому +17

    You may have just saved a bunch of relationships by educating us on what love language is (for those who weren’t aware of it.) ❤️🙂❤🙂❤

  • @bellawella5778
    @bellawella5778 Рік тому +1

    Awww y’all are too precious ❤❤ Why did I tear up at some parts 😂😂 I’m just a sucker for good love real love and that’s what y’all have ❤❤ I pray that your union continues to strengthen every year ✨✨ Sending lots of love your way Cole & Charisma 🌿🌿🥰🥰

  • @mariapicchi7118
    @mariapicchi7118 Рік тому +2

    Dear ones, thank you for sharing your love languages with us. In fact, my husband and I, who have been married for 32 years, have used all the languages you have listed. Also because, over the years together, many situations happen, good and not so good and in the latter, believe me, we have tried to nurture a deeper love between the two of us, otherwise we would not have made it. We have truly experienced situations of great pain and what has saved us is

  • @mlougrowden6152
    @mlougrowden6152 Рік тому +9

    So much wisdom for a couple that are so young I know that you guys are going to make it work. Thank you for all that you’ve said.

  • @maggiemacha5552
    @maggiemacha5552 Рік тому +6

    Sending love to you both ❤ These kinds of discussions are very important! Thanks for sharing from your hearts 💕

  • @lillyumulisa9056
    @lillyumulisa9056 Місяць тому

    Pure souls that God puts together to testify God's amazing love. Proud of you guys keep shinning and live longer and healthy. Love you!

  • @damarisokwuosa3748
    @damarisokwuosa3748 Рік тому +2

    Love from Kenya🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰,I think you guys have done well so far I keep praying for your union , focus on being healthy and raising your family and taking care of each other. You have already overcome a lot of challenges to get to where you are . stay positive and you shall be well.

  • @lindamurphy9883
    @lindamurphy9883 Рік тому +1

    All the best you two, I love you two as a couple. It is obvious you two love each other a lot.

  • @sandramcglinchey7712
    @sandramcglinchey7712 Рік тому +2

    I have been married for 30 years. I liove❤my husband yes we both believe that affirmation are #1

  • @marynamurray9385
    @marynamurray9385 Рік тому +1

    I see a lot of affection and love between you two and YT is not the place to show extreme intimate affection. You are both so comfy and relaxed with each other and in a disabled relationship where it it not the same as an abled relationship, but I see a lot of love!💌🤗

  • @janicemichaloski5292
    @janicemichaloski5292 Рік тому +1

    The way you two look at eachother its clear how you are so in love with each other ❤

  • @johnwest9577
    @johnwest9577 Рік тому +2

    When we married 50+ years ago there was no such info of the 5 love languages; but our pastor who counseled us before the wedding asked us if we had ever fought. We said, "yes!" He replied, " Good, because I wouldn't want to marry two strangers!" That gets to the root of how important it is to get to know one another and how to show your love and receive it. Time and living life does change you, and we have found we have become more like each other in our years together. You both inspire!

  • @Gee5425
    @Gee5425 11 місяців тому +1

    I'm 12 years in with my husband. I've never been really touchy affectionate, and after we had our twins I went a year without wanting to be touched. I was so overwhelmed, and had reached my touch limit before noon most days. My husband was working night shift, and I think that's a huge reason we made it through that year. I think my love language is probably acts of service, and I guess that came after I had the kids, and finally allowed my husband to take care of me. I was always very independent, and I can do for myself. Now I like that he does the man stuff, and takes those harder things off my shoulders. Before the kids, I guess either words of affirmation or gifts. Not so much buy me stuff, but write me little notes, grab me flowers, we also had some really tough years in the beginning, so maybe I was just younger and wanted to be fooled. But I definitely felt what your friend felt after having kids. I was way over stimulated and exhausted. I think I probably had some postpartum going on with dealing with premature births and disability diagnosis. That's actually when I first found yall, about 5-6ish years ago.

  • @sloanhaughton4174
    @sloanhaughton4174 Рік тому +2

    I think that you both are connected when on camera. Riding on your lap, sitting super close, his arm 🎉around you. For me having been married 22 years I have changed. My hubby is not super physical because his family isn't, but mine is. However, I am not as physical as I used to be, but I do miss it sometimes. So words of affirmation and doing simple things is now my love language.

  • @karatindall3525
    @karatindall3525 Рік тому +1

    My husband and I have been together for 21 years, we didn't know love languages was a thing when we first got together so we never looked into it, but after listening to you guys in this video mine would definitely be physical touch and quality time, thanks for this video guys

  • @lolly4821
    @lolly4821 Рік тому +1

    My husband and I have been married for 15 years, together for 18 and we both value physical touch over anything else, but my second would be "words of affirmation", and my husbands is "acts of service". I feel like our love languages have stayed the same over the years, and having the same primary love language has served us well.....lots of hugging and hand holding in this house..:). You two are precious and I'm sorry that people think they can analyze your relationship from a 20 minute clip of your day. Thanks for sharing.

  • @itszorozco
    @itszorozco Рік тому

    I absolutely love quality time. I agree that form of intimacy and connection is key. Amen

  • @destinyidentitywithdrannac6114

    I loved the way you intellectually expounded on your title and with so much transparency. Thank you both; this was very reflective and valuable for others to take to heart. Blessings. Your childbearing is coming soon and to God be the glory!!

  • @Piecesoftheshadow
    @Piecesoftheshadow Рік тому +3

    I’m not touchy and it can overwhelm me too but my partner is touchy. So I relate to Charisma. We both taught each other our love languages and have grown together through it and our changing love languages (the ones in the books and the ones added later). They’ve changed either because we’ve changed as people or our relationship has changed. 14 years. We can now never be apart and we joke maybe it’s codependent but we don’t care anymore, ha.

  • @Sketcher93
    @Sketcher93 11 місяців тому

    What a strong video hearing these specific points you guys have obviously worked on in your relationship. So impressive and inspiring for others to learn from. You are a smart couple. I'm new to the channel, thank you! Came here from the Squirmy and Grubs channel.

  • @bravebird1578
    @bravebird1578 Рік тому +3

    I love his window picture frame...i wonder what the love languages of both your parents are that you learned without realizing it. Taurus does not do well with change. Touch shows the ability to truly be vulnerable with your mate, it requires trust.

  • @NicoviaAnglin-z6p
    @NicoviaAnglin-z6p 8 місяців тому

    Omigosh! I just commented on something about you saying that ppl are saying you do everything for him...as if that is their business...I saw you both 1st...a video with your wedding when he was commenting on how beautiful you look & you were like 'you look goooood.' I saved that video...I LOVE you guys so much...#TrueLove...may God continue to bless your marriage & you have such a nice voice...you guys are so cute!

  • @kimcollins2333
    @kimcollins2333 Рік тому +2

    My husband and I have been married 45 years, and our love languages have definitely changed. When your kids come, time will definitely be important. Always have a date night, even I’d all you do is go to get ice cream. Make time for each other

  • @paulineitimbien6212
    @paulineitimbien6212 Рік тому

    Hi you twos inspired me alot..my husband is also a C5/6 spinal injury patient and we've been together for 7yrs now. We are from Papua New Guinea ❤🙏 sending our warmth greetings..

  • @loriaversher5477
    @loriaversher5477 Рік тому +1

    Wow, this was so amazing! It is great to see how you both think of your needs and try to understand each other as well.. Thanks so much.

  • @shellywatson1483
    @shellywatson1483 Рік тому +1

    He made that picture because he was expressing how big his love was for you❤❤❤❤
    His heart is heavy for you❤
    You guys should write a book this is beautiful😊😊

  • @donnafredenburg6063
    @donnafredenburg6063 11 місяців тому +1

    You can tell you both really love each other in your eyes the way you look at eat other

  • @dawnh2541
    @dawnh2541 Рік тому +2

    C&C, in my opinion I don't think it was necessary to responding to some people's negative responses about your show of affection. There are various ways to show affection. I have seen both of you showing affection with each other . Charisma tends to sit on Cole's lap is showing affection. Charisma and Cole kissing each other. And the public dont need to be entertain with tongue kissing. I have seen both of you being close to each other as if your space was one. Many married couple dont even appreciate being in each other's space. It's nice of you guys to address this topic. Sometimes it's best to keep people guessing. Some people will never be satisfy but criticize, judge, and complain. You're entitled to privacy.
    Blessings

  • @azmtngirl69
    @azmtngirl69 Рік тому +3

    I have been married for 32 years. And a lot has changed between us. We don't spend as much time together as we used to, and I think that is because as people we have changed. And on top of that my husband is an alcoholic, so there has been a lot of let downs in our lives. But with all that has happened in our lives I still love him very much. So basically I have come to the realization that he will do what he wants to do and I will just spend my time with my 5 kids, their significant others, and 3 grand babies and enjoy my life with them. Because my kids are my life and have always been my life. But just to add. You and Cole will be fine I know. I wish my relationship with my husband could be like your's and Cole's. 😊❤

    • @alanamaee11
      @alanamaee11 Рік тому

      That honestly sounds so miserable and horrible. I have heard/seen many relationships like the one you described with your husband and it’s so disheartening to hear about because the relationship seems so one sided. It seems like you have an unhealthy attachment to someone who you acknowledge isn’t the in the best state of mind to be a father, husband, or reliable human being. I hope for you happiness and your strength to break away and realize that life is TOO short! You have time to live and to find the love you’re deserving of❤️

  • @lenayoung7871
    @lenayoung7871 Рік тому

    Love you, guys,! I have been married for almost 27 years and our love languages HAVE NOT changed😊. My husband is still physical touch/words of affirmation and mine is quality time/acts of service. No one has ever told me about the touching and babies. 😮. After 4 babies I thought I didn’t like him touching me at all, but it wasn’t what I needed at the time. Sage advice? We need all the love languages at certain times so I wouldn’t contain it to one or two. Be open with your partner but that comes from knowing yourself as well. Praying for a babies and healthy pregnancies.

  • @Emma-Rose
    @Emma-Rose Рік тому +1

    I really like your channel. You are a beautiful couple, loving, fun and caring. You’ve a wonderful relationship and others who are negative should keep there thoughts to themselves… have some respect for this lovely couple xx

  • @justjackie3792
    @justjackie3792 Рік тому +3

    You made me laugh out loud with the sarcastic, “next time I’ll say you suck” 😂