CORONAVIRUS COMEDY: 10 answers MUSICIANS will want to hear | Rainer Hersch parody

Поділитися
Вставка
  • Опубліковано 21 тра 2020
  • Are you a musician? You need to hear this. Conductor & comedian Rainer Hersch explains his hilarious 10-point Corona (COVID-19) plan. Funniest classical music on the web. Subscribe!
    WEBSITE www.rainerhersch.com
    FACEBOOK / therainerhersch
    TWITTER / rainerhersch
    THIS CLIP
    If you are a musician, Coronavirus (COVID-19) has left you in deep doo-doo. You want to know what is going to become of you and your orchestra, string quartet, jazz band or rock group, right? Are you ever going to play your violin with anyone else ever again? Well, your own President or Prime Minister isn't talking about it so, on your behalf, Rainer Hersch (the 'President of Music') explains his 10-point plan to save your skin. OK, granted, not all the suggestions are equally practical, but they will make you laugh. Relax, have fun and join the Rainer Hersch party at www.rainerhersch.com.
    And, no, the vacuum cleaner is not in tune. Sorry. It sucks :-)
    ABOUT RAINER HERSCH
    A trained conductor and pianist, British stand-up comedian Rainer Hersch ("Victor Borge for a new generation" The Times) has performed on every comedy stage in the UK and in more than thirty countries across the world. He is responsible for UA-cam hits such as "Orchestra plays Microsoft Windows™ - the waltz" • Funny! Orchestra plays... to "The Funniest Classical Orchestra Ever" • Funniest Classical Orc... - this is the guy that actually does on a concert stage what others just talk about. Find out what Rainer did next bit.ly/1hGR52j Rainer and his Orkestra are on tour in Autumn 2020 www.rainerhersch.com/whatson/
    All enquiries: management@masterpiece.me.uk
  • Комедії

КОМЕНТАРІ • 150

  • @randomoperagirl7155
    @randomoperagirl7155 4 роки тому +48

    I'm slightly disturbed by the vacuum cleaner not being in tune 😭

  • @marafortune3713
    @marafortune3713 4 роки тому +25

    As a German, I must say that your description of Germany was hilarious and spot on! 😂👍🏼

    • @RainerHerschYouTube
      @RainerHerschYouTube  4 роки тому +6

      Haha. Great. Please share this with the rest of Germany so they know we are coming.

  • @Bigvs.Dickvs
    @Bigvs.Dickvs 4 роки тому +45

    A doctor, a photographer and a musician meet.
    The doctor says that with the money he earns he'll buy a nice home with a swimming pool
    The photographer says he'll rent a simple but nice flat.
    The musician says he'll buy a T-shirt.
    - And what about the rest of the money, how will you manage it? - the other asks.
    The musician replies:
    - Don't worry, I'll ask it to my parents!

  • @leonardonsius
    @leonardonsius 4 роки тому +26

    German here and I almost spit out my morning Pils when you brought about point 5 😂😂😂

    • @RainerHerschYouTube
      @RainerHerschYouTube  4 роки тому +1

      hahahahahaha!

    • @vanessamussle5079
      @vanessamussle5079 4 роки тому +5

      Me as a German not obsessed with cars now worried I have to go to another country

    • @minnieyuyantung
      @minnieyuyantung 3 роки тому

      @@vanessamussle5079 what is that German word means

    • @WoodymC
      @WoodymC 3 роки тому +2

      @@minnieyuyantung It translates to "legal expenses insurance companies" --- not that much shorter in English, LOL... ;)

    • @eligebrown8998
      @eligebrown8998 3 роки тому

      Ha ha ha

  • @WoodymC
    @WoodymC 3 роки тому +8

    "Rechtsschutzversicherungsgesellschaften" --- Wow, that was pretty well pronounced, Rainer! :-)
    P.S. As a German AND a musician, I have to confess that I'm not _that_ obsessed about cars, but pipe organs instead.
    If I should guess why, I'd say because they're not just way bigger, but they also do sound much more pleasant than an engine. Not to mention the numerous pedals and switches! ^^

  • @EVISEH
    @EVISEH 4 роки тому +35

    We Aussies prefer a Kangaroo's pouch to a balcony. Keeps our career moving forward in leaps and bounds

  • @ramanoojdasbasu3097
    @ramanoojdasbasu3097 4 роки тому +4

    Can't work out if Rainer Hersch is the president of music or president of comedy. One of the most captivating and engaging conductors I have ever come across. His music is always in a different 'note' 😆😆

  • @dcbunny8852
    @dcbunny8852 4 роки тому +17

    I have an addition to #8,
    use a viola as fire wood to stay warm

    • @RainerHerschYouTube
      @RainerHerschYouTube  4 роки тому +5

      Yeah! Now why didn't I think of that? I have got three. Good for a couple of hours.

    • @bethhentges
      @bethhentges 4 роки тому

      No!

  • @wiebkeniebel9554
    @wiebkeniebel9554 4 роки тому +21

    You would be welcome here in Germany.
    The language thing is really simple, take two substantives and put them together, go on with more of them and you will get really long words. It is a funny method of finding new words, especially for authorities. I promise you Germans neither understand some word creations others make.
    But I promise you you can decide between three things in Germany:
    Firstly, be obsessed with your car
    Secondly, be obsessed with soccer
    Third, be obsessed with hating people that are obsessed with soccer or cars and the worst, people that are obsessed with both
    But the socks and the sandals are really important, I promise ;) .
    Thank you for your videos, they make me laugh. I am not a musician actually, I am an Ingenieur, but it is a pleasure to watch them.

    • @RainerHerschYouTube
      @RainerHerschYouTube  4 роки тому +7

      Vielen Dank. 'Zusammengesetztehauptwörtesprache' may be the word you are looking for. Glad you like videos and that they cheer you up. Thank you for watching.

    • @marafortune3713
      @marafortune3713 4 роки тому +6

      I am also a German and in today’s newspaper I actually read about a couple that was suing their neighbour farmers because their cow bells were too loud. This is truly a story I could only imagine happening in Germany 😂

  • @ishkabibble6601
    @ishkabibble6601 Рік тому

    The man is genius! Right up there with Victor Borge and Peter Schickele 👍🏼🤣😸

  • @nemeczek67
    @nemeczek67 4 роки тому +58

    The coughing audience were just annoying. Until now.

  • @LeonMcCawleyPianist
    @LeonMcCawleyPianist 4 роки тому +15

    Brilliant. How did you know that I do my online teaching like that ?! ;)

  • @robertwilson7532
    @robertwilson7532 4 роки тому +7

    Splendid, with lockdown and insomnia, Mr H lifts or spirits again. Excellent work sir. Thanks

    • @RainerHerschYouTube
      @RainerHerschYouTube  4 роки тому +3

      Thanks. Hope you get to sleep. But not during the videos :-)

  • @StevesSlideandJazz
    @StevesSlideandJazz 4 роки тому +41

    I vote for Hersch for President!

    • @RainerHerschYouTube
      @RainerHerschYouTube  4 роки тому +15

      Thank you. You see, I already accepted!

    • @mrgreyman3358
      @mrgreyman3358 4 роки тому +2

      of the whole world, for life. then for after life, after we cryo freeze him. I am sure we can keep the head working at least.

    • @isaactrefz9744
      @isaactrefz9744 4 роки тому +2

      He’s not a US citizen, but I think he could become the US president. I would vote for him if I were old enough to vote.

  • @seoultrip25
    @seoultrip25 4 роки тому +1

    I got a blues harmonica for my lockdown. It portrays exceptionally well that look of misery, sadness, imprisonment and brokeness that we all share as musicians nowadays.

  • @zynzane9680
    @zynzane9680 4 роки тому +1

    Laughed out loud at the vacuum cleaner! Thank you, President of Music!

  • @DynamixWarePro
    @DynamixWarePro 4 роки тому +7

    Hilarious! 3:08 - Thank you for the good advice! I have now turned my alto saxophone into a retro looking lamp. Will I miss playing it? Sure, but my family are happier that I won't be honking around the house disturbing them anymore! Also, as I don't have a clarinet I can't make binoculars, but I do have a straight soprano sax which given your advice, I may now turn into a telescope (or most likely a microscope given the narrow neck). 😂

    • @RainerHerschYouTube
      @RainerHerschYouTube  4 роки тому +3

      Hahaha. Hilarious. Well, glad you got something out of it.

    • @minnieyuyantung
      @minnieyuyantung 2 роки тому +1

      @@RainerHerschUA-cam piano could be a shelf,love from hk

  • @someone_tbn
    @someone_tbn 4 роки тому +6

    1:53 😂 my favorite #jazz

  • @lancelot1953
    @lancelot1953 3 роки тому

    Thank you so much Mr.Hersch for helping musicians around the world cope with the COVID-19 Pandemic and develop new innovative ways to get some return for the years they devoted learning to master their instruments. For example, most of our brass musicians has found new uses for their expensive instruments as containers for growing inexpensive garden produces and adding shrubbery to their small balconies. Wood instruments are very useful for teaching children "stuck at home", with their parents "stuck at home with the said children", on how ingenious termites create their artistic castles in a terrarium. Our string artists have found a new purpose in life by providing safety and security for their more peaceful fellow musicians using a selection of "bows" as defensive projectiles (arrows) against potential corona-virus carriers who do not want to respect proper safe distancing practices. In that respect, the harp is particularly well suited to keeping multiple protesters at bay (protesters who may object to your singing) as it can "launch" several "bows" at the same time. Finally, percussion instruments provide a any kitchen with a variety of cookware from simple to elaborate and includes numerous drumsticks, mallets, brushes, etc... to enable needy musicians to find a second career. Ciao, L (Maine, USA)

  • @janethattam
    @janethattam 4 роки тому +3

    I live in South Australia and had to watch this in a house I broke into to steal food. Now, typing from the remand centre, but it was worth it...not to mention the three meals a day now.

    • @RainerHerschYouTube
      @RainerHerschYouTube  4 роки тому +4

      Thank you for this but please remember that breaking the law is wrong. Unless you either in the government or a senior advisor to the Prime Minister.

    • @janethattam
      @janethattam 4 роки тому

      @@RainerHerschUA-cam I am so embarrassed.

  • @clairef.9908
    @clairef.9908 4 роки тому +3

    This is so funny. You really lifted.. if I dare say so.. my spirits about the future. Thank you! And stay safe!!

  • @forevermore9431
    @forevermore9431 3 роки тому +1

    Greetings from Germany! I haven't laughed so hard since months. Great video!

  • @stevenak115
    @stevenak115 4 роки тому +6

    as a tenor the singer joke killed me lmao! you're brilliant as always

    • @RainerHerschYouTube
      @RainerHerschYouTube  4 роки тому +3

      Thanks. I hope that bit turns out NOT to be true. Woodwind and brass, also, might spit out the dreaded lurgy.

  • @Mireille-Danse
    @Mireille-Danse 4 роки тому

    Well, welcome to Austria! Why not! I have a violin, 2 accordions, 3 guitars, 1 wonderful marimbaphone, a lot of small percussive instruments, drums, flutes, Hackbrett (?), a ragtime piano and a lot of friends who are musicians and also have a lot of music instruments! Anytime! It is great to laugh, even about corona, thank you for your videos!

  • @jeanmatlock370
    @jeanmatlock370 4 роки тому +2

    Love your comments..... I personally am happy to make my own music at home..... Roland organ and Native American Flutes....

  • @redpoppy3569
    @redpoppy3569 4 роки тому +4

    If my singing infects others, then they'll be singing with me not getting corona.

  • @eligebrown8998
    @eligebrown8998 3 роки тому

    Isn't that the safe word they used in Eurotrip where Jacob Pits. (Cooper Harris) was tied to that bed? 😂😂😂😂

  • @FQuintanaMarrero
    @FQuintanaMarrero 4 роки тому

    That image not wearing trousers!! 😂😂🤣🤣 It made my day!!

  • @amygoodwin255
    @amygoodwin255 4 роки тому +2

    I'm currently going for a mix of 2 and 9

    • @RainerHerschYouTube
      @RainerHerschYouTube  4 роки тому +2

      Haha. If it gets a bit much, you could go for a variant and have your students cryogenically frozen.

  • @phearlesspharaoh3697
    @phearlesspharaoh3697 2 роки тому

    😂😂😂 YES! Bravo maestro

  • @sueliile1877
    @sueliile1877 3 роки тому

    Thank you for this video🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @FelixVW
    @FelixVW 4 роки тому +1

    This is hilarious. Thank you for this video.

  • @HenJack-vl5cb
    @HenJack-vl5cb 4 роки тому +1

    Brilliant!!!

  • @lilylimtiaco
    @lilylimtiaco 3 роки тому

    I am laughing so hard!

  • @andresfelipeayala1995
    @andresfelipeayala1995 2 роки тому

    very hilarious! Jejeje
    Greetings from Colombia! ;)

  • @ugod101
    @ugod101 4 роки тому +1

    I miss playing in my local church, no hymns for a while! I've taken to creating modern versions of baroque pieces in my boredom...

    • @RainerHerschYouTube
      @RainerHerschYouTube  4 роки тому +2

      Sounds good. Hope you get to play them to someone soon.

    • @trueriver1950
      @trueriver1950 4 роки тому

      Maybe there are no hymns, but at least you are not getting hearses either...

  • @niloofarhemmat2899
    @niloofarhemmat2899 4 роки тому +2

    Wonderful and very funny, you are one of the best comedians in the world also composing amazing pieces

  • @DMariaWoods
    @DMariaWoods 4 роки тому +18

    HA! Just get use to being broke, or marry someone solvent....🤑🤧😷

  • @dhruel
    @dhruel 4 роки тому +3

    I saw a band at a bar once, who would have been improved by vacuum cleaners. At least something would have held a note. 😋

  • @vickystrudwick3939
    @vickystrudwick3939 4 роки тому +3

    hahaha well played, sir.
    PS I had to know what "rechtsschutzversicherungsgesellschaften
    " translates to, so for anyone wondering....... "legal expenses insurance companies". You're welcome :-)

  • @FreddieAugust
    @FreddieAugust 4 роки тому +2

    Hey Rainer, much clearer message than the government is putting out!!! The Germany bit got me thinking about "the secret to a great marriage is sleeping in separate rooms..." ha, ha. Rather apt during the lockdown. Hope you're staying well

    • @RainerHerschYouTube
      @RainerHerschYouTube  4 роки тому

      Thanks Freddie - well, I am the self-appointed President, after all. Someone needs to be. I'm fine, hope you are too. I am sure you are going through all this with similar concerns. Greetings to you and yours.

  • @rogerbrinker420
    @rogerbrinker420 2 роки тому

    Funny!

  • @thomashughes4859
    @thomashughes4859 4 роки тому +9

    HAHA! Shared with all my music friends ... who, of course, cannae pay for the internet anymore ... or get data for their mobile phones, really, so I guess the monitisation on your video fell flat here as well.
    Jolly well! Keep up your spirits, mate! Saludos! ;)

  • @catecurl3790
    @catecurl3790 4 роки тому +4

    😂😅😊 diddly squat

    • @RainerHerschYouTube
      @RainerHerschYouTube  4 роки тому +1

      Yup. Love that word. The Australian artistic community probably not so much

    • @mrsenstitz
      @mrsenstitz 4 роки тому

      Direct quite from Classical Rap. Another...the cat can only drink gerbil milk.

  • @thecakeisalie652
    @thecakeisalie652 3 роки тому

    The singer and the german part killed me :D - I guess right from a german alto hobby chamber choir singer? :D

  • @sirtroy
    @sirtroy 4 роки тому

    Truly helpful! lol 😂

  • @mate5791
    @mate5791 4 роки тому

    2:24 Good job!

  • @margaridaesteves3618
    @margaridaesteves3618 3 роки тому

    This made me laugh really hard! I m a musician but i am not old enough to undertand that😂😂
    Great video!

  • @RedT...TheOriginal.NotANumber
    @RedT...TheOriginal.NotANumber 4 роки тому +2

    What a refreshingly uplifting and helpful video! (/sarcasm)
    That was hilarious hyperbole! (not sarcastic)

  • @midapiano
    @midapiano 4 роки тому

    The burn at 2:05! 🔥🔥🔥

  • @bcgrittner
    @bcgrittner 4 роки тому +1

    Funny.

  • @Dragontrumpetare
    @Dragontrumpetare 3 роки тому

    Ok, now I am certain. YOu remind me of late Victor Borge, he also was hilarious... :-)

  • @Amphitera
    @Amphitera 3 роки тому

    it would be possible for musicians and singers to give live performances on virtual platforms like Second Life.
    Dancers (and conductors) are still screwed, though.

  • @DavidS-iw4ei
    @DavidS-iw4ei 4 роки тому

    I started to laugh reading the title.

  • @juanpedrosuarez111
    @juanpedrosuarez111 4 роки тому +1

    You go conductor.

  • @binesiemens3584
    @binesiemens3584 4 роки тому +1

    You're welcome to "the continent"...🤗!
    Maybe we are crazy for Birkenstock, white stockings and our beloved cars (especially on the german Autobahn...😉), but take a look at our neighbours in the netherlands! THAT'S a little bit more "special"...😂
    ➡️ search for "singende Strasse, Niederlande" (singing road netherlands)...
    Reactivating this creativ kind of art would be awesome in these times!!

  • @jimmyyu2184
    @jimmyyu2184 4 роки тому +2

    In absolute worst scenario, remember, Bass burns the longest, next comes Cello, Viola, and then Violin... You can always use the Ukuleles for toothpicks, or shish-kabob sticks. If you have to kill your neighbour, I recommend Harp or Piano wires. =))))

    • @CarolJLevin
      @CarolJLevin 4 роки тому

      Harp makes a decent cheese slicer in the upper register.

    • @minnieyuyantung
      @minnieyuyantung 3 роки тому

      First u have to got enough strength to lift up the piano

  • @therealperegrine
    @therealperegrine 4 роки тому

    Did you record the video on a viola or what's up with the video quality? Lol.

  • @juliejay5436
    @juliejay5436 3 роки тому +1

    It would be hilarious if it wasn't so true!

  • @chuckcrunch1
    @chuckcrunch1 4 роки тому

    yes the Arts bail out in Australia is $500,000 per state so about 3.5 million total . exactly didly squat

  • @Heinrich2awsome
    @Heinrich2awsome 3 роки тому

    I already live in Germany😂

  • @filker0
    @filker0 4 роки тому

    Good advice, but do you have anything for banjo players?

    • @RainerHerschYouTube
      @RainerHerschYouTube  4 роки тому +1

      Burn ‘em. Use the frame and skin as a table tennis racquet.

    • @minnieyuyantung
      @minnieyuyantung 3 роки тому

      @@RainerHerschUA-cam how about piano players

    • @BrooksMoses
      @BrooksMoses 3 роки тому

      @@minnieyuyantung : Pianos are even better firewood than banjos. Or you can use them for small houses.

  • @waldstein6443
    @waldstein6443 4 роки тому

    You pronounced the german word really well. Do you have german relatives or know german?

    • @RainerHerschYouTube
      @RainerHerschYouTube  4 роки тому +1

      Yes, both. Rainer Wolfgang Hersch - it's in the name. My Dad was German.

  • @Frankamaria
    @Frankamaria 4 роки тому +3

    greetings from Germany ^^ try to play or sing on a blacony - the neighbourhood will sue you 🙄 It's better to learn the German term "Hausordnung" in advanced :p

    • @RainerHerschYouTube
      @RainerHerschYouTube  4 роки тому +1

      Thanks for the warning.

    • @Frankamaria
      @Frankamaria 4 роки тому +1

      @@RainerHerschUA-cam sadly some habits of my fellow countryguys are a bit... strange ;)

  • @marionthomas8981
    @marionthomas8981 3 роки тому

    😅😪😂🥴

  • @felixccaa
    @felixccaa 3 роки тому

    get used to be broker so u don't get broke - only Your customers do ...

  • @radheshyamyadav2175
    @radheshyamyadav2175 2 роки тому

    Suman hahan

  • @ankavoskuilen1725
    @ankavoskuilen1725 4 роки тому

    Very good advice, only with the Birckenstocks you take it too far. 😱😱😱😱😱😱

  • @the9of7
    @the9of7 4 роки тому +1

    rechtsschutzversicherungsgesellschaften = legal expenses insurance companies

  • @matthewhammans4365
    @matthewhammans4365 4 роки тому

    Australia has a $130 Billion stimulus package, which is like €60 B, more than Germany, any we have like a third of the population so like what was that all about

    • @RainerHerschYouTube
      @RainerHerschYouTube  4 роки тому

      Sorry, that €50B figure being given out by the German state is largely for the arts. Not sure where your figure comes from but it sure isn’t being directed just at arts organisations. Unfortunately, Corona has happened during a period in which arts funding in Australia is being cut www.theguardian.com/culture/2019/nov/15/setting-us-up-to-fail-funding-uncertainty-brings-arts-companies-to-a-crisis-point?CMP=Share_iOSApp_Other A lot of Australian performers and creatives, who can, leave Oz.

    • @matthewhammans4365
      @matthewhammans4365 4 роки тому

      Rainer Hersch Fan Channel oh ok that makes sense I didnt realise it was for the arts, go Germany booo Australia

    • @DrKazAstro
      @DrKazAstro 4 роки тому

      Zero for the arts here in Australia. Zero for universities as well

  • @sinform9714
    @sinform9714 4 роки тому

    To point 5. Germany: 4. For the german rescue Package you will also need a running business since the last 12 months minimum.

    • @RainerHerschYouTube
      @RainerHerschYouTube  4 роки тому

      Unfortunately, I think we will be well clear of the 12 months by the time any of us get back to work.

  • @margaretjiantonio939
    @margaretjiantonio939 2 роки тому

    It's now 2022 & we're still in the same mask wearing sinking ship. I'm going to visit my eighborhood package store & pet store. Booze for me catnip for my 3 cats.

  • @Lenny-kt2th
    @Lenny-kt2th 2 роки тому

    Hmm, someone of German descent WITH a sense of humour? Must be the British half...

  • @be2thoven286
    @be2thoven286 4 роки тому

    In Germany is nothing to fetch!!!!!!!!!!........... Nobody is able to make some gifts!!!!!!!........... Our leaders gave our money to the europeen union!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.............

  • @robzombieshot
    @robzombieshot 4 роки тому

    PLEASE GET A HAIRCUT .... OR....... GROW IT LONGER SO YOU LOOK MORE CRAZED... LOL

  • @AndreaGerakSinger
    @AndreaGerakSinger 2 місяці тому

    It's absolutely hilarious 😂😂 - and a bit painful in the same time: now in 2024, I am still trying to get out of the vicious circle the Covid lockdown had put me in, having to do singing in the streets. (Well, tips in my virtual hat are super appreciated! 🤲❣️ I have Revolut, PayPal, Stripe, Wise...)
    Or yes, I could also have a rich man 😅

  • @margaridaesteves3618
    @margaridaesteves3618 3 роки тому

    This made me laugh really hard! I m a musician but i am not old enough to undertand that😂😂
    Great video!