@@kalmmonke5037attractive people are born not made if it was that simple many men wouldn’t struggle cause it’s the things that you can’t change that are most attractive and rare women like the most height face race hair
100% felt that burden of performance. I’d say I’m a good looking guy and have always been hyped by my family so I always felt the need to live up to an image. Thank you for the video Elisha.
its the same for me. I focused on myself got into pretty good shape found my style and now I feel that burden of performance too, even when I interact with girls. It feels like girls expect me to be a certain way and they want that imaginative version of me
One thing I've learned to recently is just to do something even though I am nervous or fearing it. Just doing it or just showing up, and not thinking about the "how" before you do it, is key. The how will come later, you just have to make your mind up beforehand, then do it, and the how will come naturally.
I agree. One of the worst mistakes you can make is hide from responsibility and challenge and keep to your comfort and safe zone. This might feel better in the moment but longterm you will deeply regret all these missed opportunities, even if things don't go perfect you can always learn and it's exposure theory: it gets easier every time. The more often you choose comfort the worse this issue gets, you become more and more anxious about less and less uncomfortable and challenging situations to the point you're scared of picking up the phone when it's buzzing or stare into the floor every time a woman your age passes you. This problem is flourishing in modern age as technology offers the perfect safe zone where nothing can harm you, but as a man you must CRAVE danger, maybe not literal danger in "you might die" but danger in the sense that it might not be easy, stop choosing the easy paths, they turn you into a weakling. Many guys just turn down any invitation or opportunity automatically and become quite literally weak and that is very unattractive in a man. Go out of your way to do things that make your stomach turn, tell your body you'll do it no matter how uncomfortable it may decide to make you feel, you will push through this upcoming hardship and you'll come out of it a better, stronger man.
I’ve been “friendzoned” by countless girls who were initially attracted to me but I ruined it by being mr nice guy. Women want a real man, there’s not much else to it.
It's not your fault bro. We are brainwashed to be the nice guy. Especially today. Men are taught to be feminine and women are taught to be masculine. Especially in movies, television and music of today.
I have the same problem. Always trying too hard to impress on a date, even if I didn’t like the girl that much. I’ve since learned u don’t have to do or say much, they should be the one trying to impress you. Just sit back, chill and keep a bit of mystery going.
It just depends man. Another thing I've noticed is most of the times we don't even know the reasons they rejected you. Half of the time it's a multivariate problem and you're taking it in personally and setting yourself up for failure for the next time you ask a girl out by sabotaging your self worth.
The nice guy meme is untrue. You can be the nicest guy on earth and still do great with women. The key is being nice on your own terms and not simply because you want something from them. Astronomical difference
@@jude_210 I’m referring to the typical “nice guy” term that gets thrown around a lot. It basically means you try to act as nice as possible so that girls like you back. It’s when you aren’t being genuine, your niceness is transactional/conditional. In a way, it’s being dishonest. Being truly nice is a difficult story.
7:07 the piece about how women love men’s nature the same we love theirs. I think this was a great perspective and way of putting this. Quality video as always.
@keineahnung472 men generally only care about holes and service because women create the toxic playing field. if women had any sense of equality, they wouldn't weaponise their bodies to manipulate male needs, they wouldn't make men approach them first, and they'd actually be courteous beings. that's really all men want, and i personally want only ever wanted a woman for qualities besides a hole and food. those are just bonuses. women, however, use men for everything like height, looks, money, confidence, attention, education, humour, and the list just goes on. women are never going to change, and they're the ones responsible for forcing men to use those two things you selected to motivate them talking to you guys. you guys also don't give us food or a hole unless we do all the providing first. change things, and we might value you guys for once. ive been approached by 200+ women in my life and all of you guys don't say a word; you just stare at me until you allow me to decide if i feel you're attractive enough to stop and speak to. this is a primary reason i say that women are just basic weaponisers of their body and manipulate us because they feel they don't, or shouldn't have to rather, risk approaching us to shatter their non existent confidence i appreciate a good looking girl who dresses well, doesn't weasle out of approaching, treats men like actual humans, has a sense of humour, and actually partakes in the earning process. women sit there using men on a daily basis for just merely existing and also to add, we actually have to wow and arouse your hole to begin with for you to give us anything back. so by fault, we give you guys something before we get something back. that's also a worse position by just a basic understanding of how trade works. only doing trade with those that bend over backwards for you is manipulative and disgusting. women want men just as much but weaponise their feminity to single out all the hot men to use them. women are the lowest tier species of humans to exist and i am frightened to ever dream of thinking like one and how they actively use men as commodities. it's crazy you think men just value a hole and food when we begin to see you as those things bc of your rudeness and weaponisation of your body to grant you special treatment. it's actually insane you think we aren't humans just wanting basic conversation without making things catering just to you. all women are like this that ive met, and all of you expect many traits up front to be seen as valuable. not only that, but most girls are classist by design of their being due to the privileges of picking men and prefering money, status, and all round social proofing. that exists for most decently raised white men in the west and anyone who grew up relatively well. as an attractive man, it's hard to ever respect women when you see in the flesh how they actively manipulate you to their desire. you're pretty dense to even ask this question as if men somehow created toxic dating dynamics, despite women being the choosers in all aspects of their life
I think you sir are one of the best mentors for men’s self improvement/ mindset. And it is your chillness. You care and I can tell. Also really appreciate the realness in your videos. Unedited.
As a woman, this a great message. A man who is comfortable in his authenticity no matter if he’s naturally outspoken or more reserved, it’s attractive. Women can tell if you’re faking your nature
I've been told numerous times that I'm a good looking dude and had girls come onto me BUT all of that doesn't matter because I'm quite literally socially r*t*rded when it comes to women. It's as if something switches in my brain and I turn from this outgoing, always smiling and chill dude to like a plank of wood. Been struggling with it all my life, ever since I started "dating" at like 12 or something up until now. No matter how many advices I take or however much I expose myself to uncomfortable situations my brain just flips this switch (sometimes, but often) and I just turn into a different person. It's slowly making me super bitter and angry, not at women, but myself. I have high standards for myself and the fact that I can't perform in this one area of my life drives me nuts.
@@gatorade1968 it's actually sad that there are people who think they can't find a partner because their eyes aren't shaped a certain way. at least I know I literally suck at socializing with women and are therefore going to work on it, whereas this guy is delusional and will not do a thing about it, staying bitter and angry.
Always the voice of reason bro, very true. I only had generous chemistry with girls when I wasn't trying to be casanova. Then I realised, I was casanova when I didn't know what I was doing xd
@@ElishaLong it’s been tough bro. A lot of harsh changes. But I’m coming out of it now, starting to build back that structure. That adversity changes a man for sure. Hope you’re doing well
Good reminder Elisha. Often, I think I need to act a certain way or say certain things to women to “make her like me”. But the right women for me will like me for who I am and the natural masculine energy I have.
I agree. We get in our own way most of the time because we don't see our value. Women are inherently attracted to masculinity. This red pill stuff has fucked a lot of guys up. Women like how I am warm and genuinely kind.
Remember guys you don’t always have to speak, show attention and do stuff because it’s social etiquette. You learn a lot from sitting back and relaxing
man... 45 here, no carrer, doing uber, I do take care of myself and attract women but can't keep them because of my job i end up telling them. Im triying to get back to manual therapy, personal training, but it's hard as a male in my culture. I got kicked by this amazing girl and I feel so hopeless, on despair, with anxiety, like I will never be able to keep a girl, just be the passing guy... I hope times gets better, so little motivation to get my bussines moving, I think i'm depressed some days feels like it...
@@keineahnung472 went carnivore, my depression is gone. The girl was a typical modern woman, kind of dropped the woman achievement. Much better now without that pressure, I actually enjoy free time and doing uber here and there.
Wow this advice hits incredibly close to home. Two years ago, I got out of a 7 year relationship and I had A LOT more going for me than that boy from 7 years ago. I have fucked up multiple times when girls literally approached me because I was putting on an act. I thought I had to be some kind of way. I've also shied away from being genuinely kind because I thought it would give the appearance of being needy. The bread metaphor is right on the money!! Thank you for your wisdom!
yup pretty much same here. Incredibly depressed to a point where gym and intensive cardio don't even help, this amplifies my lack of confidence and anxiety. Haven't actually socialized even once this entire year. Funny thing is last may-june i dated an attractive chick and my social anxiety was 90% gone and i was more confident. I seemed to flow better socially (more witty, more articulate, more social) and everyone treated me noticeably better. TLDR: in my opinion 90% of confidence comes down to adequate social interaction and validation.
@@dbased1915 sorry to hear that bro, im getting better since i found friends but i still need more confidence and just fix my life in general move it forward and to do that is me getting on gym and making money which both are going on better and better, i wouldnt recommend steroids but maybe that would be an option for you? it will give you confidence strength and obviously testosterone which is the key in any men life, but if you are under 21 dont do it yet bro, im 22
@popwithme brother don't do anything you shouldn't do. Stay natural, of all bad shit. And work out, get enough sleep, eat good food, work out maybe 3x a week in the gym/on your body, (a tip is full body workout 3x a week as it saves time) and then run or do some endurance or cardio type of workout where you get really drained because it will boost a lot of things for your brain that could help you, and you'll get a better rush from that than from the gym. Also keep doing the uncomfortable things. Set a goal of how you want to reach your goal to conquer your social anxiety. Like talk to x amount of girls a day or in a specific way, like maybe a little convo and then work it up from there. I've also been there and just do the uncomfortable and you'll get better with time
I disagree with how downplayed looks/aesthetics are. 2 men could say and do the exact same things and be perceived entirely differently based on looks alone. The bar for better looking/taller men is significantly lower and they can get away with so much more based on these things alone
Thing is you can't change your height so you might as well looksmaxx yourself as much as possible. No reason to dwell on height. I see some good looking dudes who are short with gorgeous women
Great example of what you talking about is Cliff Booth portrayed by Brad Pitt in once upon a time in Hollywood. Laid back confident guy, always in a present moment and going with the flow.
@@liyon316 no it's not. Most people with his capabilities while just go around and looking for troubles, to break some bones and faces... will be cocky, etc. He is just laid back. Doesent give a sh# about anything, but if somebody wants it he will give it generously.
I get complimented alot on my eyes by women who look like me, and I always act super chill around them. Recently a hot waitress was so engulfed by my looks she was spilling water on the floor refilling my drink. People you are comfortable with will always be familar. Your type of girl will not be one you are intimidated to talk to but one you want to spend more time with. It’s a subconscious thing that is inalienable from us. You cannot choose it, but you will know when it is there. Women are ultimately the selector of mates because in a free society they have all the reproductive power. You would have to oppress them through arrainged marriage or other forms of forced relationships to circumvent such a law.
all this did was make females weaponise their reproductivity to be narcissistic, psychotic, manipulative and basically worthless. u cannot spin this to make it seem neutral in any way
I had a similar experience growing up seeing these guys do pickup, always being "on" having every situation in their control, being a kid I often felt powerless so this was interesting to me. I did learn a lot from some more mature "artists" out there that kind of went against the whole pickup line routine and just explained this anxiety in not being myself. "Owen" was one I remember. I don't think it's fair to say that culture has nothing to offer young men because at the very least it's introducing them to this cat and mouse game that is modern dating. And at worst it's exposing young men to the reality of rejection which they should be able to handle- something their online sweethearts will never be able to teach.
We just found out that my sister was secretly going out with a older guy at night in his place and this made my father very angry, so we confronted the guy and he couldn't even talk just ran away like a little boy we weren't even doing anything and what makes me rage with anger is this guy was using "techniques " from red pill content and now i know that having "game" doesn't make you a man i have to get stronger and bigger and smarter for my family so that i can protect them from little kids playing.
You're insane if you think there's something wrong with her going out with an older guy but not the exact same thing with some biologically inapposite kid dweeb male her age. Don't slander your fellow men as myself who like young women. Call out the man's dishonorable behavior of running away, but that has nothing do to with the age aspect. That's equally dishonorable no matter if he's older or not.
Great video and I am mulling this over. Right now I am brimming with anger and a little bit of anxiety. Anger more so than anxiety as I believe I am pretty confident. I have to find a way to take my power back. I am better than this. I deserve better than this.
I'm 30 and decent looking but every interaction with a woman ends with an L,I'm just too soft and "nice" and get friend zoned or rejected, it's pathetic.
Flashback to that time a coworker of mine noticed a group playing Uno and told everyone card games at work with other dudes is kind of suspect. He also broke his bananas off before eating them. No, women there did not think he was better for it and he was regularly the butt of their jokes.
Hot women, I mean the hottest ones, are easy if you just keep it real. Instead grow confidence in your ability to escalate in a non-creepy way. You fight creepiness by being real. In fact, you fight shit tests in the same way, though you should ofc learn how to defeat shit tests. But IMHO if you get shit tests, then you're really doing something wrong, and by "defeating" the shit test, you're really only putting on a band aid.
@@bithon5242 The hardest thing within PU is to explain how to "be yourself." But you'll get a lot further by dropping cheesy pickup lines, or trying to neg her, or doing silly stuff that will just end up blowing you out of the water. But in order to do that, you need the confidence to understand that you're already good enough. But from thereon you have to take charge. Say, have you ever wondered if you should grab a woman's hand? It's kind of like that. What happened if you did? It's one of the most intimate things you can do. And there's just _so_ much information to glean from it. Does she pull away? Well, then perhaps it was weird, or perhaps _you_ were weird. But no matter, by doing so, you've already stated your intent. And all women respects a man that dares to state their true intent, without looking like a clown trying to entertain them (the ultimate sign of a beta male loser btw). Hope this made things a bit more clear.
what is that energy that we are supposed to posess. how do i know when that energy is authentic, what is that natural state inside of me? how do i know when im just chilling and not putting on a facade.
I’m confident only problem girls think we are players and they want us to chase them it sucks man they never trust us and have there guard up it ruined my first marriage man and I loved her but constant jealousy mistrust playing mind games wanting me to chase her trying to make me jealous or angry to show passion people don’t talk about this enough she also was jealous of any success I got in life financially because she thought I would leave her it’s unfortunate
The gathering place of chads on the internet. High Thumos Brotherhood
www.patreon.com/elishalong
people like someone who is helpful because its fun more than the guy whos helpful because he needs to be
become the attractive guy dont act like it. people dont like fake, its not as enjoyable to hide fake in the long term.
These videos keep coming in the right times
@@kalmmonke5037you can’t become chad if your not tall goodlooking light skin with mace hair
@@kalmmonke5037attractive people are born not made if it was that simple many men wouldn’t struggle cause it’s the things that you can’t change that are most attractive and rare women like the most height face race hair
Alright Elisha you have my attention.
Mine too.
funny comment
What did you say? I was focusing on the video
100% felt that burden of performance.
I’d say I’m a good looking guy and have always been hyped by my family so I always felt the need to live up to an image. Thank you for the video Elisha.
Absolutely man
My family tried to hype me up but at the time I was in my own head and didn't believe them
its the same for me. I focused on myself got into pretty good shape found my style and now I feel that burden of performance too, even when I interact with girls. It feels like girls expect me to be a certain way and they want that imaginative version of me
Cracking me up with the bread analogy brother. Thank you
BE THE BREAD
I had to pause the video you made me laugh so hard. “What if the bread went BRAAAAAHHH” killed me bro thanks for that 💀
I lost it too😂 immediately dropped a like
One thing I've learned to recently is just to do something even though I am nervous or fearing it.
Just doing it or just showing up, and not thinking about the "how" before you do it, is key.
The how will come later, you just have to make your mind up beforehand, then do it, and the how will come naturally.
Very true. It's very rare we ever regret putting ourselves out there and doing something that makes us uncomfortable
I agree. One of the worst mistakes you can make is hide from responsibility and challenge and keep to your comfort and safe zone. This might feel better in the moment but longterm you will deeply regret all these missed opportunities, even if things don't go perfect you can always learn and it's exposure theory: it gets easier every time. The more often you choose comfort the worse this issue gets, you become more and more anxious about less and less uncomfortable and challenging situations to the point you're scared of picking up the phone when it's buzzing or stare into the floor every time a woman your age passes you. This problem is flourishing in modern age as technology offers the perfect safe zone where nothing can harm you, but as a man you must CRAVE danger, maybe not literal danger in "you might die" but danger in the sense that it might not be easy, stop choosing the easy paths, they turn you into a weakling. Many guys just turn down any invitation or opportunity automatically and become quite literally weak and that is very unattractive in a man. Go out of your way to do things that make your stomach turn, tell your body you'll do it no matter how uncomfortable it may decide to make you feel, you will push through this upcoming hardship and you'll come out of it a better, stronger man.
it's crazy to me women expect men to have confidence when they have boring, mundane, copy and pasted personalities themselves.
I’ve been “friendzoned” by countless girls who were initially attracted to me but I ruined it by being mr nice guy. Women want a real man, there’s not much else to it.
It's not your fault bro. We are brainwashed to be the nice guy. Especially today. Men are taught to be feminine and women are taught to be masculine. Especially in movies, television and music of today.
I have the same problem. Always trying too hard to impress on a date, even if I didn’t like the girl that much. I’ve since learned u don’t have to do or say much, they should be the one trying to impress you. Just sit back, chill and keep a bit of mystery going.
It just depends man. Another thing I've noticed is most of the times we don't even know the reasons they rejected you. Half of the time it's a multivariate problem and you're taking it in personally and setting yourself up for failure for the next time you ask a girl out by sabotaging your self worth.
The nice guy meme is untrue. You can be the nicest guy on earth and still do great with women. The key is being nice on your own terms and not simply because you want something from them. Astronomical difference
@@jude_210 I’m referring to the typical “nice guy” term that gets thrown around a lot. It basically means you try to act as nice as possible so that girls like you back. It’s when you aren’t being genuine, your niceness is transactional/conditional. In a way, it’s being dishonest. Being truly nice is a difficult story.
7:07 the piece about how women love men’s nature the same we love theirs. I think this was a great perspective and way of putting this. Quality video as always.
the tricky part is knowing that women just use you for what you provide vs men actually appreciating more than just their holes
@@temposetter1091looool
@@temposetter1091then tell me what men appreciate about women besides their bodies and services
@keineahnung472
men generally only care about holes and service because women create the toxic playing field. if women had any sense of equality, they wouldn't weaponise their bodies to manipulate male needs, they wouldn't make men approach them first, and they'd actually be courteous beings. that's really all men want, and i personally want only ever wanted a woman for qualities besides a hole and food. those are just bonuses. women, however, use men for everything like height, looks, money, confidence, attention, education, humour, and the list just goes on. women are never going to change, and they're the ones responsible for forcing men to use those two things you selected to motivate them talking to you guys. you guys also don't give us food or a hole unless we do all the providing first. change things, and we might value you guys for once. ive been approached by 200+ women in my life and all of you guys don't say a word; you just stare at me until you allow me to decide if i feel you're attractive enough to stop and speak to. this is a primary reason i say that women are just basic weaponisers of their body and manipulate us because they feel they don't, or shouldn't have to rather, risk approaching us to shatter their non existent confidence
i appreciate a good looking girl who dresses well, doesn't weasle out of approaching, treats men like actual humans, has a sense of humour, and actually partakes in the earning process. women sit there using men on a daily basis for just merely existing and also to add, we actually have to wow and arouse your hole to begin with for you to give us anything back. so by fault, we give you guys something before we get something back. that's also a worse position by just a basic understanding of how trade works. only doing trade with those that bend over backwards for you is manipulative and disgusting. women want men just as much but weaponise their feminity to single out all the hot men to use them. women are the lowest tier species of humans to exist and i am frightened to ever dream of thinking like one and how they actively use men as commodities. it's crazy you think men just value a hole and food when we begin to see you as those things bc of your rudeness and weaponisation of your body to grant you special treatment. it's actually insane you think we aren't humans just wanting basic conversation without making things catering just to you. all women are like this that ive met, and all of you expect many traits up front to be seen as valuable. not only that, but most girls are classist by design of their being due to the privileges of picking men and prefering money, status, and all round social proofing. that exists for most decently raised white men in the west and anyone who grew up relatively well. as an attractive man, it's hard to ever respect women when you see in the flesh how they actively manipulate you to their desire. you're pretty dense to even ask this question as if men somehow created toxic dating dynamics, despite women being the choosers in all aspects of their life
I think you sir are one of the best mentors for men’s self improvement/ mindset. And it is your chillness. You care and I can tell. Also really appreciate the realness in your videos. Unedited.
he's pretty mundane
As a woman, this a great message. A man who is comfortable in his authenticity no matter if he’s naturally outspoken or more reserved, it’s attractive. Women can tell if you’re faking your nature
I've been told numerous times that I'm a good looking dude and had girls come onto me BUT all of that doesn't matter because I'm quite literally socially r*t*rded when it comes to women. It's as if something switches in my brain and I turn from this outgoing, always smiling and chill dude to like a plank of wood. Been struggling with it all my life, ever since I started "dating" at like 12 or something up until now. No matter how many advices I take or however much I expose myself to uncomfortable situations my brain just flips this switch (sometimes, but often) and I just turn into a different person. It's slowly making me super bitter and angry, not at women, but myself. I have high standards for myself and the fact that I can't perform in this one area of my life drives me nuts.
Do you stop breathing
Sounds natural. Be the plank.
@@ElishaLong my mind just turns blank. I guess that’s just something I gotta work on there’s no way around it
@momo kaka that’s not what prey eyes are
@@gatorade1968 it's actually sad that there are people who think they can't find a partner because their eyes aren't shaped a certain way. at least I know I literally suck at socializing with women and are therefore going to work on it, whereas this guy is delusional and will not do a thing about it, staying bitter and angry.
The art of being chill video is an Elisha Long classic.
thank you, i needed this... i've become overly obsessed with my looks and judging other guys looks
Glad it helped brother
Always the voice of reason bro, very true. I only had generous chemistry with girls when I wasn't trying to be casanova. Then I realised, I was casanova when I didn't know what I was doing xd
That's it brother
Been watching you since the early stages of your UA-cam career. You’re one of the few that follows what they preach. The world needs more of this
Thanks for the support bro. How's life going for you?
@@ElishaLong it’s been tough bro. A lot of harsh changes. But I’m coming out of it now, starting to build back that structure. That adversity changes a man for sure. Hope you’re doing well
I stpped using smart phone for 7 days it changed my life i became so chill and i found out i can make people laugh without even trying
Good reminder Elisha. Often, I think I need to act a certain way or say certain things to women to “make her like me”. But the right women for me will like me for who I am and the natural masculine energy I have.
I agree. We get in our own way most of the time because we don't see our value. Women are inherently attracted to masculinity. This red pill stuff has fucked a lot of guys up. Women like how I am warm and genuinely kind.
Thumos, I'm embarking on the journey of moving out of my hometown on July 22nd. EL's videos of leaving the hometown/family behind inspired me.
Congratulations. It will all work out. High Thumos
Good luck brotha
Most guys are chads, because we technically have the best genetics in our bloodline.
no the truth is less than 1 percent of men are real chads
Most can’t be the best of the best. Only top 10% can be “chads”, and then the top 1% - gigachads
My friends and family hype up my looks a lot, so this is video is most definitely helpful
That bread "BWAAAAGH" had me laughing out loud 😂 thank you Elisha
You are extremely advanced. thanks for your constant encouragement and support for the males out here👏
I still remember back in high school how the prettiest girl in our grade liked me but I was too shy to go up to her and introduce myself.
Remember guys you don’t always have to speak, show attention and do stuff because it’s social etiquette. You learn a lot from sitting back and relaxing
The bread analogy is phenomenal
Be in the game, rejection after rejection you will find girls who like you and you will be relaxed.
Thank you Elisha, I will become the best piece of bread I can be
man... 45 here, no carrer, doing uber, I do take care of myself and attract women but can't keep them because of my job i end up telling them. Im triying to get back to manual therapy, personal training, but it's hard as a male in my culture. I got kicked by this amazing girl and I feel so hopeless, on despair, with anxiety, like I will never be able to keep a girl, just be the passing guy... I hope times gets better, so little motivation to get my bussines moving, I think i'm depressed some days feels like it...
Any update?
@@keineahnung472 went carnivore, my depression is gone. The girl was a typical modern woman, kind of dropped the woman achievement. Much better now without that pressure, I actually enjoy free time and doing uber here and there.
I know merch is never a priority but I'd love to buy a poster of a piece of bread to remind me of masculine stoic calmness.
Hey Eli, it's Tom from Hurricane. I wanted to let you know that that bread allegory was absolutely genius.
Videos have been absolutely fantastic of late Elisha
Thanks man. Let me know if you have any topics you'd like to hear about.
@@ElishaLong Delaying gratification
This man got me thinking about a piece of bread, feet up balls out, just screaming 💀
Wow this advice hits incredibly close to home. Two years ago, I got out of a 7 year relationship and I had A LOT more going for me than that boy from 7 years ago. I have fucked up multiple times when girls literally approached me because I was putting on an act. I thought I had to be some kind of way. I've also shied away from being genuinely kind because I thought it would give the appearance of being needy.
The bread metaphor is right on the money!!
Thank you for your wisdom!
thats literally me, i have social anxiety and it fucks my women interraction up all my life
yup pretty much same here. Incredibly depressed to a point where gym and intensive cardio don't even help, this amplifies my lack of confidence and anxiety.
Haven't actually socialized even once this entire year. Funny thing is last may-june i dated an attractive chick and my social anxiety was 90% gone and i was more confident. I seemed to flow better socially (more witty, more articulate, more social) and everyone treated me noticeably better.
TLDR: in my opinion 90% of confidence comes down to adequate social interaction and validation.
@@dbased1915 sorry to hear that bro, im getting better since i found friends but i still need more confidence and just fix my life in general move it forward and to do that is me getting on gym and making money which both are going on better and better, i wouldnt recommend steroids but maybe that would be an option for you? it will give you confidence strength and obviously testosterone which is the key in any men life, but if you are under 21 dont do it yet bro, im 22
@@dbased1915 also im looking to start taking a quarter of xanax's pill i see onlune people recommend it it kills your anxiety
@@dbased1915 start also meditating ive heard it helps too, i have just started
@popwithme brother don't do anything you shouldn't do. Stay natural, of all bad shit. And work out, get enough sleep, eat good food, work out maybe 3x a week in the gym/on your body, (a tip is full body workout 3x a week as it saves time) and then run or do some endurance or cardio type of workout where you get really drained because it will boost a lot of things for your brain that could help you, and you'll get a better rush from that than from the gym. Also keep doing the uncomfortable things. Set a goal of how you want to reach your goal to conquer your social anxiety. Like talk to x amount of girls a day or in a specific way, like maybe a little convo and then work it up from there. I've also been there and just do the uncomfortable and you'll get better with time
Man’s dropping gems 👊
Gigachad-level advice 👑
I disagree with how downplayed looks/aesthetics are. 2 men could say and do the exact same things and be perceived entirely differently based on looks alone. The bar for better looking/taller men is significantly lower and they can get away with so much more based on these things alone
Thing is you can't change your height so you might as well looksmaxx yourself as much as possible. No reason to dwell on height. I see some good looking dudes who are short with gorgeous women
Elisha truly is a funny guy
When in doubt just be masculine, and constant, and true.
Great example of what you talking about is Cliff Booth portrayed by Brad Pitt in once upon a time in Hollywood. Laid back confident guy, always in a present moment and going with the flow.
Easy to be cliff booth when you’re an unstoppable badass that can beat down Bruce Lee and psycho cult members!
@@liyon316 no it's not. Most people with his capabilities while just go around and looking for troubles, to break some bones and faces... will be cocky, etc. He is just laid back. Doesent give a sh# about anything, but if somebody wants it he will give it generously.
Hahahaha that thing about the bread and the BAAAAAH man I loved it!!
I get complimented alot on my eyes by women who look like me, and I always act super chill around them. Recently a hot waitress was so engulfed by my looks she was spilling water on the floor refilling my drink. People you are comfortable with will always be familar. Your type of girl will not be one you are intimidated to talk to but one you want to spend more time with. It’s a subconscious thing that is inalienable from us. You cannot choose it, but you will know when it is there. Women are ultimately the selector of mates because in a free society they have all the reproductive power. You would have to oppress them through arrainged marriage or other forms of forced relationships to circumvent such a law.
all this did was make females weaponise their reproductivity to be narcissistic, psychotic, manipulative and basically worthless. u cannot spin this to make it seem neutral in any way
Your timing is impeccable
I had a similar experience growing up seeing these guys do pickup, always being "on" having every situation in their control, being a kid I often felt powerless so this was interesting to me.
I did learn a lot from some more mature "artists" out there that kind of went against the whole pickup line routine and just explained this anxiety in not being myself. "Owen" was one I remember. I don't think it's fair to say that culture has nothing to offer young men because at the very least it's introducing them to this cat and mouse game that is modern dating.
And at worst it's exposing young men to the reality of rejection which they should be able to handle- something their online sweethearts will never be able to teach.
That is a lot of value for 12 minutes
let him cook!! be that bread baby
the bread example is the first time hearing it. great example
That made me feel warm and relaxed, dude--thanks.
Thank you for this my dude. Great piece of advice.
Thanks for checking the vid bro. Any other topics you'd like to see
genius bread metaphor
SOI sauce - absolute gold 😂 sound advice!
Seeds Of Imagination
@@ElishaLong Perfect analogy. Will definitely be using it. Cheers mate!
No BS. Straight to the Value. Sick.
havnt watched you in months but glad you popped back up
he said be a piece of bread lmao. be yourself you mean I agree friend
Great video Elisha, learnt alot once again.
We just found out that my sister was secretly going out with a older guy at night in his place and this made my father very angry, so we confronted the guy and he couldn't even talk just ran away like a little boy we weren't even doing anything and what makes me rage with anger is this guy was using "techniques " from red pill content and now i know that having "game" doesn't make you a man i have to get stronger and bigger and smarter for my family so that i can protect them from little kids playing.
You're insane if you think there's something wrong with her going out with an older guy but not the exact same thing with some biologically inapposite kid dweeb male her age. Don't slander your fellow men as myself who like young women. Call out the man's dishonorable behavior of running away, but that has nothing do to with the age aspect. That's equally dishonorable no matter if he's older or not.
The bread metaphor is legendary
Love this Elisha.
Great video and I am mulling this over. Right now I am brimming with anger and a little bit of anxiety. Anger more so than anxiety as I believe I am pretty confident. I have to find a way to take my power back. I am better than this. I deserve better than this.
Your helping awakes Chads across the world
Great message
Good take my friend. Thank you
Not gonna lie, your videos are better than most psychology books
Haha I like the bread/minnows analogy
Sounds like you’re getting rained on my guy! Good stuff
Don't matter if it's Cheesy bread, Sourdough, Texas toast, or Raisin, they come to nibble.
I saw the title and thought, yes this is me. I sure am good looking, I know I am. Right
Yes bro
I'm convinced no one on this planet is as good looking as Elisha.
Magnificent speech ❤
Be the bread. 🦆 🍞
this video made me calm
I'm 30 and decent looking but every interaction with a woman ends with an L,I'm just too soft and "nice" and get friend zoned or rejected, it's pathetic.
Why do you think you come off as too soft?
@@ElishaLong I'm a people's pleaser
Me to the bread after it starts talking: Bro, you are scaring the hoes
"You don't wanna over water it OR YOU'LL KILL IT" Great anaology
Bro thank you for bringing this up.
Great advice I learned late in the game
you just had to call me out in this one huh
really good analogy. Piece of bread in a pond! very good
Flashback to that time a coworker of mine noticed a group playing Uno and told everyone card games at work with other dudes is kind of suspect.
He also broke his bananas off before eating them.
No, women there did not think he was better for it and he was regularly the butt of their jokes.
Instructions unclear im now a loaf of Aldi bread send help
Alot of guys can’t be chad cause if they where chad wouldn’t exist chad is rare if everyone is chad no one is
Manifest: I AM BREAD
Today it’s be chad or be gone
Too many guys addicted to tick tock and other garbage, learn how to talk to women, have women friends that you can talk to then it gets better....
Hot women, I mean the hottest ones, are easy if you just keep it real. Instead grow confidence in your ability to escalate in a non-creepy way. You fight creepiness by being real. In fact, you fight shit tests in the same way, though you should ofc learn how to defeat shit tests. But IMHO if you get shit tests, then you're really doing something wrong, and by "defeating" the shit test, you're really only putting on a band aid.
bro what are you even trying to say lmao
@@bithon5242 The hardest thing within PU is to explain how to "be yourself." But you'll get a lot further by dropping cheesy pickup lines, or trying to neg her, or doing silly stuff that will just end up blowing you out of the water. But in order to do that, you need the confidence to understand that you're already good enough. But from thereon you have to take charge.
Say, have you ever wondered if you should grab a woman's hand? It's kind of like that. What happened if you did? It's one of the most intimate things you can do. And there's just _so_ much information to glean from it. Does she pull away? Well, then perhaps it was weird, or perhaps _you_ were weird. But no matter, by doing so, you've already stated your intent. And all women respects a man that dares to state their true intent, without looking like a clown trying to entertain them (the ultimate sign of a beta male loser btw).
Hope this made things a bit more clear.
This a very positive message brother 🙏
Thanks man
Long story short, be like bread 🍞💪
what is that energy that we are supposed to posess. how do i know when that energy is authentic, what is that natural state inside of me? how do i know when im just chilling and not putting on a facade.
BTE big thumos energy
OMG I needed to hear this bro!
A lot of great points thanks
He speaks truth
Finally a legit handsome guy giving advice on handsome men....
Good video, I guess I’m not good looking then.
Did you just refer to us as “bread” 😂😂
Finally, a relevant video.
I’m confident only problem girls think we are players and they want us to chase them it sucks man they never trust us and have there guard up it ruined my first marriage man and I loved her but constant jealousy mistrust playing mind games wanting me to chase her trying to make me jealous or angry to show passion people don’t talk about this enough she also was jealous of any success I got in life financially because she thought I would leave her it’s unfortunate
mr bean tells you what to do 😂
Masterpiece