Interpersonal Effectiveness Extras: I-It vs. I-Thou Relationships

Dr. May discusses the difference between Martin Buber's concepts of I-It relationships (superficial, need-based) and I-Thou relationships (seeing and accepting someone as a whole person). She also talks about ways we can work toward moving some of our one-dimensional relationships into deeper ones.
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[@allritchclermont221]

"Remember what we have in common rather than what separates us".
This quote is so deep; it says it all. Thank you so much!!

[@nare9149]

I think everyone should watch this video, better yet it should be a part of the education curriculum. Instead of yelling at each other we explore why we are the way that we are and what we can do about it.

[@Plasmafox]

We tried that until people cut from the same cloth as the originator of this idea decided some people don't get a voice in that conversation.

[@atheistyoda8915]

Thanks! My teacher couldn't explain this quite well due to their internet connection not being good. These explanations allowed me to understand the concept pretty easily.

[@victoriacoronado1631]

I came into this video with an I-it relationship and felt like I left with an I-thou relationship. Thank you very much for putting this video on the internet available for people like me learn.

[@jennifermayph.d.2761]

Oh, wow. That's great to hear! Thanks for sharing. ❤

[@valeriabustillos2719]

You helped me in ways I didn't know I needed. Thanks!

[@jennifermayph.d.2761]

Oh wow, thanks! Glad to hear! ❤️🙏

[@MoneyMagnetHacks]

This really helped me to understand it easier so thank you so much :)

[@jeremiahsmarketing]

This is real Practical Dr.May....thanks alot. I Learnt something valuable from this and not not that alone but understanding

[@study3145]

Thank you so much for this comprehensive explanation. Helps me a lot.

[@LeonTsao]

This is beautiful. A worthwhile lesson! Especially summed up well with the Buddhist quote, I'll remember that one.

[@maryhernandez1047]

11:04 to go back :)

[@alldentulayba5806]

this really helped me to understand better these two concept

[@theresaoclarit6746]

thank you for this informative video. It helped me understand our Philosophy lesson.

[@princessvuyolwethumntonint4490]

Very valuable lesson, thank you.

[@jennifermayph.d.2761]

You're very welcome!

[@yanwrites4984]

Thankx, it was really helpful... Appreciate your efforts

[@kylepatrickmurphy4058]

Very good work Dr! Thank you! 🥰🥰🥰

[@SuperFaby27]

thank you, this has been very helpful.

[@gailalexisdamilig9140]

helped me a lot! THANK U SO MUCH!

[@cathrinemahwire2949]

Thank you incredibly much. I learned a lot from this video because it is very detailed.🍀❤

[@jennifermayph.d.2761]

Glad to hear! Thanks for watching! 🙏💕

[@litonGod]

Your vids are awesome! Thanks!

[@ilovecartmanz]

Thank you very much, ma'am! This helped me understand our lesson even more❤️

[@klarkzamora6754]

P00

[@joshuadominiquemaaba4734]

Thank you ma'am!!

[@aialjung7872]

THIS WAS SO GOOD

[@aleecheekhong]

Thanks a lot Dr. Jennifer May for your teaching on the difference between Buber's concepts of I-IT relationships and I-Thou relationships. Reflection: Do I relate someone as it or as thou?

[@davidbradley4305]

Good advice for not objectifying or going to prejudice

[@angelibacalso306]

Thank you so much for this video:)

[@drdj148]

This is great! Nice job!

[@jennifermayph.d.2761]

Thank you! 👍🏻🙏

[@Mattn2819]

This is very good thanks so much.

[@jennifermayph.d.2761]

Thank you!

[@abduljarickasper1871]

thank u so much maam.

[@beriawalter2391]

thank you so much

[@mariapena6483]

Thank you for a thorough explanation of both concepts. It has certainly helped me understand it better for a graduate class I'm taking. Can you give us an example of how the "I-Thou" relationship/perspective could help improve the workplace?

[@jennifermayph.d.2761]

Hi Maria,
That's a good question!
I would say that examples of I-It in the workplace include when we see people just as their roles rather than whole people. So the housekeeper is just a one-dimensional person in a low position cleaning up around the office. A boss is some jerk in authority telling me what to do to drive me crazy doing a lot of unnecessary things. The salesperson is just a guy who helps to bring in money to help the company's bottom line.
When we see these people as one-dimensional, we may end up being rude, biased, stereotyped, or disrespectful. But if we start to remember that all of those people are whole human beings with feelings, a life outside the workplace, and a family, it helps us interact with them more compassionately. When people at work feel more appreciated and respected, less like a "number," they tend to have higher job satisfaction. They might put more effort into their work and feel more invested in the company rather than just doing the bare minimum to scrape by and get a paycheck.
Hope that helps!
Dr. May :-)

[@mariapena6483]

@@jennifermayph.d.2761 Thank you. These were very good examples!

[@gbrielle4445]

Thank you!!🤍

[@kylepatrickmurphy4058]

Great video as always!

[@jennifermayph.d.2761]

Thanks so much! 🙏

[@luxcity9034]

Thank you so much po💛

[@mhikosingalawa9200]

thank you po❤️❤️

[@jeremyjoanes1268]

hey I appreciate this video !
😀

[@jennifermayph.d.2761]

Thanks! I appreciate you comment! 😊

[@crizzabelle8542]

THANKYOU SO MUCH!

[@gailalexisdamilig9140]

ANDITO KARIN PALA HHSHSHHSHSHSHS

[@crizzabelle8542]

Gail Alexis Damilig HAHAHAHAHA

[@YusukeUrameshi166]

Thanks! That was a very good explanation Ma'am.

[@myspiritway]

Namaste to all of you

[@xinaerogalang5203]

THANKS!!!

[@dronpluge3391]

Muchh lovee

[@jhaveevalencia7340]

Thank you po God bless

[@ankitupadhyay0427]

Hi, I'm from India.
Tommorrow is my exam 😀
Seriously, thank you for such a wonderful session. ❤️

[@jennifermayph.d.2761]

You’re welcome! So glad I could help!

[@maryeileenhammond2940]

I would love to share this with my students. Could you please turn closed captioning on? If you set the video language to English, UA-cam will auto-caption it for you.

[@jennifermayph.d.2761]

OK, I just tried turning on the captions. Let me know if it works!

[@maryeileenhammond2940]

@@jennifermayph.d.2761 I'm still not seeing the option for captions. Have you set the language for this video? UA-cam won't make captions if the language isn't set (there's no default language setting). Thanks for looking into this!

[@jennifermayph.d.2761]

I selected English and said to turn on captions. I'm not sure what else to do...

[@maryeileenhammond2940]

@@jennifermayph.d.2761 Thanks for trying!

[@pauladayrit7240]

I-thou is so beautiful it's sad to even think about that we often interact in an i-it relationship

[@sensei3119]

❤️🙏

[@Plasmafox]

If a person or group treats you like an it and you insist on treating them like a thou, all you're doing is harming yourself for no reason. There's no moral high ground in sacrificing yourself for someone who hates you.

[@jennifermayph.d.2761]

You make a good point.
There is a time and a place for I-it relationships and a time for I-thou relationships. It is our job to discern when each type is appropriate and makes sense given the situation.
That being said, it is also possible to recognize someone’s humanity and set a strong boundary to protect yourself.