As a former foster child who aged out the system. That is one thing I have always wanted to create is some sort of program where those that age out and that don't have a relationship with their foster parents where they have that family connection, I would like to create something where the kids that age out have that ability to have that home/family to help keep them from ending up homeless and continuing the negative cycles.
This is a fantastic idea! Hopefully I’m not overstepping but I think it would be cool to have a monthly dinner where multiple families as well as young adult foster kids can meet up and get to know each other. You can pair kids with families based on interests. I’d love to be one of the parents/adults in a scenario like this but I have nothing to give other than a bedroom and my time and love. I think this would prohibit someone like me from helping. Maybe you can collect gift cards to pay for the foster child’s needs. Like I’d take them to dinner and pay for myself but a gift card would cover the cost of the kids meal. I don’t think you should incentivize the adults by paying for their share because it might attract the wrong kind of person. The ideal participants would be people who volunteer because they want to make a difference in the world and in the life of one young adult at a time. I really hope you are able to put together the program. I think it’ll be a tremendous help.
Totally cried when you said you were going to look into visitation and that you still feel that he’s supposed to be part of the family. You guys are so special. The world needs more of you ❤️
I have been playing with the idea of fostering a teen and have been waiting for some "signs". This video is my final sign to decide that im doing it 100%. For reference Im a 30 yr old single mom to a 5 yr old. I got this. Thank you for sharing your valuable insight!
I aged out a couple years ago and moved in with a former foster parent and started working for them. This July I have to move out and get a new job I have no money saved and I am 99% sure imma be homeless and it’s the scariest thing to think of, I have no where to go/no family to help. I wish I had someone like y’all growing up. Keep doing you. Don’t let anyone put you down.
This might be a bit of a sensitive or awkward topic, but I always wonder about the "teen sexuality" issues. That is such a hormonal time in their lives, so when they are coming into a home with other teens they haven't met, have you ever had to deal with an "attraction" between any of your non biologically related teens? If so, how do you deal with that? Love all of the great advice you two share! Thank you for being so open and honest!
When you get adopted it means you are joining a family. You adopt the parent and sibling mindset. There should be no attraction and if there is it should be discouraged.
I love this so much! As a former kid in foster care I can speak to not having any trust in foster parents and unfortunately I never stayed long enough for it to be developed. I’m now 28 and can look back onto the many good homes I was in but was to scared to be loved. Being loved was a completely foreign concept… one I’m still trying to grasp! I’m so grateful for the experiences of those loving homes because it made me curious about love and what it meant to be loved. What I’m trying to say is that even the kids you only had for a short time you made an impact on!
Wow, what an immensely eye-opening and informative video, thx! Honestly, the lack of jugement in your voices/demeanour when discussing these youth's paths, including prison, is really refreshing and reassuring. I hope to one day foster/adopt teens as well:).
I remember going on school band trips and being hosted in homes and it was so scary for me even for a weekend! I cannot imagine what these children are feeling and I pray that things can be improved in this system.
I look forward to your videos. I have learned so much about Foster Care & Adoption. My question; How do prepare your existing kids when taking another into your home? How do you help them respond when the kid says fantasy things? You know how kids are, they are quick to correct lies.
I love that you guys talk about the foster care part of your life because I was a foster care child and I aged out but I think more people need to talk about what foster care is like
I appreciate that the two of you talk about the reality of foster care etc....I'm long past this stage, but enjoy listening/watching your videos from both sides of your families!!!! Best always... ♥ from BC
I’m so grateful you both are bringing light to this. I wasn’t a foster parent. I was a single mom who just loved kids. I can’t count the number of kids that have touched my life or I’ve touched. Some l lived with me (a lot) and some was just respite for the parents and kiddos primarily teens. They need love just as much as a baby dose💞 I’m so happy you found Conner Shelly💞 I pray your able to step in and help him break that cycle!! You two are my favorite mom’s
Thanks for sharing your experiences about fostering/adopting teens. In the old vlogs of the Crazy Middles in particular, I had heard about the specific understanding for this age group from the parents' perspective. What I'm interested in, is the impact of the arrival of a teen on the family dynamics and interaction with the kids , who are already longer in the foster family. So more seen from the perspective of the kids.
As a former foster kid that is currently homeless it is hard to not be loved. When I aged out I tried to reach out to my biological mom and went back to live with her And then she tried to hurt me again I became homeless. She tried to kill me cause of my autism diagnosis. So I appreciate what you do to let people know that not all teens are bad.
I loved this video! I thought it was very educational to see and hear how all of these situations can be different. I would love to hear a part 2 of this or answering peoples questions on the subject
Everything in divine order how blessed you are that God chose Both of you to do such great things❤. You guys truly make a difference you’re his hands and feet
We started our foster/adoption journey 5 years ago this month actually! We went in to it looking to adopt 0-7year olds. But we were placed with a couple 10 yr olds temporarily and then a 2 year old. We learned quickly that our family isn’t really a fit for younger kiddos because we are so busy… then we wanted 7 yrs or older... Then very soon after, we met our now adopted daughter! You never know where your journey will take you! ❤
You ladies and your husbands are heros! We’re doing 4 foster to adopt, on top of our other ten. Three adopted kids are now in their teens and doing fairly well, but the oldest one who has been gone for several years, was a very difficult and sore slog for the entire family. I often struggle with feeling like we failed and yet we pour out everything we knew how to. Your vlogs have been such encouragements. What you are doing is hard stuff!
I. Loved. This. Video! I've taken in three teens, and two of them are truly my kids... even though only one was officially adopted. Our oldest boy was 16 when he came to us and was in permanent foster care. We are his family even though there was never an adoption...he is my son and is now (at 29) getting ready to have my grand baby! My youngest is 17 and still at home. He was 13 when we met him and 15 when adoption was finalized. I agree with everything said here! I also expected gratitude... not right away, but because they were old enough to understand, I thought they'd show gratitude as they matured. Well, they did... but it takes a long time and a strong relationship first. Our oldest actually moved out at 20, and we didn't see him for almost 3 years. That was a heart-rending time! I am so grateful he did come back to us and we have a great relationship now. Our youngest son had been in a dozen placements in just a few years. He'd essentially been rejected over and over again...though the social worker tried to frame it in a better way when telling him he'd be moving AGAIN. He didn't know what a relationship should look like, he didn't have any understanding of love...we were offering him things he didn't think he needed because he'd gone 13 years without them. We had a very rough first year or more as he matured and healed and allowed himself to be loved and to love. He has grown so much and I'm so happy for him because he's no longer an angry, hurting kid. I have 2 amazing boys! Truly!
I enjoy these videos! You two have been so inspiring. I do t know if you are going to answer this but….I’m 55, but people tell me I look much younger. Anyway, I’ve been praying about taking in older kids. Would I even be considered as a foster parent? I mean I know each state is different, I was just curious what you both thought. Even if you don’t answer this, I’m so happy that you and your families have been able to be a support to so many kids out there.
Thank you so much for this great video. I recently finish Adiction study just to help people who have problem with addiction.I know that is not easy for them because they have trauma and people have stigma...they judge them. You are so amazing.🥰
I am only 17 will be 18 in 2 months. When I get older I would really like to adopt. If I couldn’t I would like to foster. You guys made me want to do this, watching all your videos over the years. This is a dream of mine to hopefully save a child/ teen
I wish I could be adopted in someone's hearts even though I'm 20 :) That's such a huge dream for me. I wish someone would stick with me long enough to get to know me or wanna check in with me even after years, like you did with Connor! Melts my heart. But, I am so glad you found the boy who ran away - thank you for being normal and empathetic and not having judgement, almost all these kids are just trying their best with unbelievable circumstances.
what state are you in? I can't wait to become a foster parent hopefully by next year, it seems odd adopting a older teen or a young adult as a 36 year old so close in age.
@@renaej im in illinois but i think im going to ny for school :) i dont know anyone in either state well though lol thats the issue, it really breaks my heart sometimes
@@BetteDavis19 aww thats where I was going to move to, I might be going near the IL , Wisc Border not sure if I will end up in IL tho. Look into the springboard program with let it be us, They might be able to help find you a family.
there should be some basic dormitory style housing for people in transition where they can stay while working full time and saving to get their own place..a small individual room with a bed, table, dresser, small fridge and mircrowave....maybe a cafe that serves 1 hot meal per day (due to no individual kitchen facilities....so that it would be affordable to a young person with a minimum wage job.
Great vlog! Very informative and eye opening. Thank you for sharing your experience. Especially with children experiencing trauma. God bless you. My best friend works with homeless families and after navigating their case, she usually tries to figure out what their trauma is or why they are stuck. Amazing tools that I love to see in action.
I have said before I was adopted by my Aunt and Uncle. I was always lying about something. I was bullied in my home town school and had a dysfunctional family to put it mildly. I wanted to be important and know things already so what I didn't know I made up. It carried on for a while but my Aunt was patient with me. You two are so awesome and I am praying for your kid in prison.
I adopted my son when he was 10 years old he is 15 now will be 16 in May. I would love if you guys could make a video about parenting teens and different discipline ideas for teens and how to deal with all the sass and back talking that comes with teenagers lol love you guys so so much ❤️ such a huge fan of all of you guys families channels. I'm going threw such a hard time lately and your videos make my days better. 💞💯
I've always wanted to adopt, and thanks to you I now know about the foster towards adoption route. My question is how do you deal with the dreaded "you're not my mom" during a bad moment for a kid/teen even after being adopted or years of being part of the family, and how does that kid/teen deal with the (hopefully) regret from saying it? It's always been a fear of mine, knowing that once you hear it you will always have it replaying in the back of your mind even if they didn't truly mean it and just lashed out during a bad moment.
I’m pretty sure Crystal answered in her one of her videos on “crazy pieces” before saying that none of her kids ever said that to her or Aaron, so it wasn’t something she had to deal with. Not sure about Shelly and Jared though
Oh man, I needed this video! I had been feeling a hard tug to adopt a teen, but was uncertain as I have never parented a teen before. My only kiddo is 11, so we’re almost there and some days it feels like we already are 😅. The catch 22 though is that I’m a (happily) single mom. Also, my daughter really wants a brother. I’m leaning towards another girl…but would love any and all advice.
i remember when you posted the video to reach out to the kid that ran away, and even recently wondered what happened to him. Try to get the contact working, for rehabilitation it is important to have a structured, supportive environment :)
I told my brother I want to adopt and he ask like what ages? And I told him any age is good. He said not older ones just bby so you can raise them your way and I told him yes thats a good point but I would love to have older kids to he said why. I kinda explained him and he opend his eyes and said wooow you are so right he was amaized
Kids and teens shouldn’t be forced to change schools and taken from their friends while in foster care especially when they’re in the same town….. one of the kids we had said most of his trauma is from being forced away and now that he’s over 18 is doing well at home and wished he never was forced away. Bella explained her and her brother’s situation prior to entering your home permanently and I agree they deserved your warmth and love (like the rest of your kids), Howe, some kids like this girl I know was taken by force at age 10, is now 14 and the court ruled both parents are 100% great but the agency refuses to give the girl back to her parents and instead for the past 3 years she’s need to 50 homes and has been destroyed by this agency and DDS in addition to education neglect as DDS placed her in grade 2 instead of grade 9 where she belongs and recently told everyone it’s the parents fault even though they had her. Keep up the great work 😊
I love you ladies, I was also in foster care and got emancipated at 17, I was grateful to have a home I felt safe in even though the love was not there, anyways I love watching your videos but your making me anxious standing lol. Love you amazing ladies
Oh my goodness, me too! I love listening and learning from them... but it's so distracting to have them standing there I can't concentrate. They look uncomfortable which makes me uncomfortable.
Wasn't the girl who didn't talk for the longest time Destiny? I remember something being mentioned about that. What you two do is very selfless and awesome for kids who just need love and a stable family.
My favorites I love watching your channels my best friend actually adopted all three of her kids so this is very near and dear to my heart I love watching your stuff and all the stories and everything
Hello Crystal and Shelly thank you for sharing this video with us and your amazing family you are amazing people I appreciate you and everything you do
My husband I fostered teenagers for over 15 years. Utah. Living in Yuma now. Look up mayor of Escondio Cal mayor was one of youth who lived with us out of detention
I think the 18 year old age out thing is crazy! How are they supposed to find a place to live? They don’t have a credit history or savings or a work history. Their choices are basically the military, the streets or prison. So sad!
UA-cam's algorithm has shown me several videos where teens adopted from foster care talk about how much their adoption changed their lives. Shelly and Crystal talked about how challenging fostering or adopting a teenager can be. However, they did not mention how much you change that child's future for the better.
I love watching y’all’s videos. I am so glad that your kids have you both. I’m just wondering, why don’t y’all sit during the talking vlogs? I know it’s something weird to focus on sorry.
I'm so glad you guys touched on the whole lying thing. That is so helpful to know! I am curious tho..so you said they'll make like happy things up and over exaggerate things..do kids also do it like making up bad things that happened? If so, is that just as common?
You guys talked about some of your past foster kids still being in contact have any of them ever come back to you after they aged out or got adopted by someone else to see you guys again and see all the other kids or even for help
We said no teens too but...our first was a teen girl! We're also trying to get back a sibling group of 3 who lived with us for an extended respite stay. Our current agency kept them from returning to us due to they said, "Causing more trauma!" Super strange. They required us to retrain. However, each placement they had after us kept giving notice to find them another home. We are hoping the local county will transfer us today and we can find them and request them to come back to live in our care❤my heart is really in shambles over them being treated unfairly. The oldest sibling will be 13 this year and they will probably keep them separated. Any advice? Or experience with a similar situation on requesting a respite to come back in your home?
I’m a foster parent right now. We’ve only taken littles… how do you deal with technology and teens though:/? That’s one of my biggest setbacks of taking teens.
18:40 Maybe it’s the opposite. I could imagine. She probably hates the whole big intro thing with all the big reactions. Similar to how I don’t like greetings at the beginning of party’s and rather just get straight back to where we left off. So I 100% understand this. She probably wanted to ease in without the input of others.
Crystal. It seems your last to placement of kids happened rather quickly. How did you know about these two families needing a family. Savannah and Lucas and Liam, Bella and rylan
I have been thinking as I get older that having kids is probably never going to happen for me due to just family things so I’ve really been considering adopting once I can finally get my own place and stop renting. I’ve even been looking at houses bigger then I need so that I have the room if I decide to go that route. I just have so many questions on everything. Been thinking about maybe going with a sibling set rather then one just cause I want to be able to keep siblings together. Can anyone give me advice on how to find the right ones to come into your home.
This is not on this subject, but why is Mindy in all of crystals crazy pieces and why is Mom and Aunt Bonnie in all of crazy middles do y’all ever switch up?
Shelly you can adopt Nicole . If she agrees to it and you all she can go to court with you and have them list you as her parents and have her named changed. But all have to agree. Just find the right lawyer to help you with that. I’ve heard of many people adopting adults as their kids even into their 30s
Truley got say im soo glad you got teen. cause thay getforgot 😢 other people would rather have younger ones than older ones cause thay might come with other problems this is soo sad 😢😢 How children where thay come from all types walk life This is sooo sad
My Mum fostered I was just a baby learning talking. My Mum fostered little boy a old lady asked in a shop your beautiful. He said my names Gordon f off....my Mum laughed about that for ever. Tho at the time was so embarrassed. She passed away October only 73 x
As a former foster child who aged out the system. That is one thing I have always wanted to create is some sort of program where those that age out and that don't have a relationship with their foster parents where they have that family connection, I would like to create something where the kids that age out have that ability to have that home/family to help keep them from ending up homeless and continuing the negative cycles.
This is a fantastic idea! Hopefully I’m not overstepping but I think it would be cool to have a monthly dinner where multiple families as well as young adult foster kids can meet up and get to know each other. You can pair kids with families based on interests. I’d love to be one of the parents/adults in a scenario like this but I have nothing to give other than a bedroom and my time and love. I think this would prohibit someone like me from helping. Maybe you can collect gift cards to pay for the foster child’s needs. Like I’d take them to dinner and pay for myself but a gift card would cover the cost of the kids meal. I don’t think you should incentivize the adults by paying for their share because it might attract the wrong kind of person. The ideal participants would be people who volunteer because they want to make a difference in the world and in the life of one young adult at a time.
I really hope you are able to put together the program. I think it’ll be a tremendous help.
Yes I have been thinking a lot about this lately. Thinking of ways I can support teens and help them so they can survive in the world.
@@unapologeticallyamy9031 YES i would love this so much for myself lol & others!
I love this idea honestly
Wonderful idea....keep us updated...please ❤
Totally cried when you said you were going to look into visitation and that you still feel that he’s supposed to be part of the family. You guys are so special. The world needs more of you ❤️
I have been playing with the idea of fostering a teen and have been waiting for some "signs". This video is my final sign to decide that im doing it 100%. For reference Im a 30 yr old single mom to a 5 yr old. I got this. Thank you for sharing your valuable insight!
You got this! 💓
Current foster caregiver here! I would LOVE to hear more stories about working with bio families (the good and bad) while fostering
There are vlogs on that topic on the main channels of both families.
I aged out a couple years ago and moved in with a former foster parent and started working for them. This July I have to move out and get a new job I have no money saved and I am 99% sure imma be homeless and it’s the scariest thing to think of, I have no where to go/no family to help. I wish I had someone like y’all growing up. Keep doing you. Don’t let anyone put you down.
This might be a bit of a sensitive or awkward topic, but I always wonder about the "teen sexuality" issues. That is such a hormonal time in their lives, so when they are coming into a home with other teens they haven't met, have you ever had to deal with an "attraction" between any of your non biologically related teens? If so, how do you deal with that? Love all of the great advice you two share! Thank you for being so open and honest!
This is also my worry. I want to adopt when I grow older but my fear is them ending up liking each other 😢 idk what to do in that situation.
No doubt it happens, kinda why I don't wanna adopt like this, gonna have mines when they are babies!
@@mortalkombrat then you shouldn’t adopt
When you get adopted it means you are joining a family. You adopt the parent and sibling mindset. There should be no attraction and if there is it should be discouraged.
This is my favorite video you guys have done!! I would loveee to hear more stories about your experiences!
I love this so much! As a former kid in foster care I can speak to not having any trust in foster parents and unfortunately I never stayed long enough for it to be developed. I’m now 28 and can look back onto the many good homes I was in but was to scared to be loved. Being loved was a completely foreign concept… one I’m still trying to grasp! I’m so grateful for the experiences of those loving homes because it made me curious about love and what it meant to be loved. What I’m trying to say is that even the kids you only had for a short time you made an impact on!
I love your comment. Thanks for sharing
Heartbreaking to hear bout Conner, hope to hear updates about him on your crazy middles channel someday!
Wow, what an immensely eye-opening and informative video, thx! Honestly, the lack of jugement in your voices/demeanour when discussing these youth's paths, including prison, is really refreshing and reassuring. I hope to one day foster/adopt teens as well:).
I remember going on school band trips and being hosted in homes and it was so scary for me even for a weekend! I cannot imagine what these children are feeling and I pray that things can be improved in this system.
I look forward to your videos. I have learned so much about Foster Care & Adoption.
My question; How do prepare your existing kids when taking another into your home? How do you help them respond when the kid says fantasy things? You know how kids are, they are quick to correct lies.
I love that you guys talk about the foster care part of your life because I was a foster care child and I aged out but I think more people need to talk about what foster care is like
I really like how you try to keep siblings together.
I appreciate that the two of you talk about the reality of foster care etc....I'm long past this stage, but enjoy listening/watching your videos from both sides of your families!!!! Best always...
♥ from BC
Love that this channel is back and more frequent ! Love you guys , best duo ! Really sparks some joy to watch !
Love love these important discussions! Thank you for advocating for children and teens!
I’m so grateful you both are bringing light to this. I wasn’t a foster parent. I was a single mom who just loved kids. I can’t count the number of kids that have touched my life or I’ve touched. Some l lived with me (a lot) and some was just respite for the parents and kiddos primarily teens. They need love just as much as a baby dose💞 I’m so happy you found Conner Shelly💞 I pray your able to step in and help him break that cycle!! You two are my favorite mom’s
Thanks for sharing your experiences about fostering/adopting teens.
In the old vlogs of the Crazy Middles in particular, I had heard about the specific understanding for this age group from the parents' perspective.
What I'm interested in, is the impact of the arrival of a teen on the family dynamics and interaction with the kids , who are already longer in the foster family.
So more seen from the perspective of the kids.
I truly love both of you. You both show what amazing foster homes can look like. There are so many that are not the best
As a former foster kid that is currently homeless it is hard to not be loved. When I aged out I tried to reach out to my biological mom and went back to live with her And then she tried to hurt me again I became homeless. She tried to kill me cause of my autism diagnosis. So I appreciate what you do to let people know that not all teens are bad.
I'm so sorry for your hard time. I agree, not all teens are bad and neither all parents.
I loved this video! I thought it was very educational to see and hear how all of these situations can be different. I would love to hear a part 2 of this or answering peoples questions on the subject
Everything in divine order how blessed you are that God chose Both of you to do such great things❤. You guys truly make a difference you’re his hands and feet
We started our foster/adoption journey 5 years ago this month actually! We went in to it looking to adopt 0-7year olds. But we were placed with a couple 10 yr olds temporarily and then a 2 year old. We learned quickly that our family isn’t really a fit for younger kiddos because we are so busy… then we wanted 7 yrs or older... Then very soon after, we met our now adopted daughter! You never know where your journey will take you! ❤
Of all the “crazy” channels, this channel is my favorite!!!! ❤
Both of you are absolutely amazing! ❤️
You ladies and your husbands are heros! We’re doing 4 foster to adopt, on top of our other ten. Three adopted kids are now in their teens and doing fairly well, but the oldest one who has been gone for several years, was a very difficult and sore slog for the entire family. I often struggle with feeling like we failed and yet we pour out everything we knew how to. Your vlogs have been such encouragements. What you are doing is hard stuff!
Love how you bring together siblings together and protect them.
I. Loved. This. Video! I've taken in three teens, and two of them are truly my kids... even though only one was officially adopted. Our oldest boy was 16 when he came to us and was in permanent foster care. We are his family even though there was never an adoption...he is my son and is now (at 29) getting ready to have my grand baby! My youngest is 17 and still at home. He was 13 when we met him and 15 when adoption was finalized. I agree with everything said here! I also expected gratitude... not right away, but because they were old enough to understand, I thought they'd show gratitude as they matured. Well, they did... but it takes a long time and a strong relationship first. Our oldest actually moved out at 20, and we didn't see him for almost 3 years. That was a heart-rending time! I am so grateful he did come back to us and we have a great relationship now. Our youngest son had been in a dozen placements in just a few years. He'd essentially been rejected over and over again...though the social worker tried to frame it in a better way when telling him he'd be moving AGAIN. He didn't know what a relationship should look like, he didn't have any understanding of love...we were offering him things he didn't think he needed because he'd gone 13 years without them. We had a very rough first year or more as he matured and healed and allowed himself to be loved and to love. He has grown so much and I'm so happy for him because he's no longer an angry, hurting kid.
I have 2 amazing boys! Truly!
I enjoy these videos! You two have been so inspiring. I do t know if you are going to answer this but….I’m 55, but people tell me I look much younger. Anyway, I’ve been praying about taking in older kids. Would I even be considered as a foster parent? I mean I know each state is different, I was just curious what you both thought.
Even if you don’t answer this, I’m so happy that you and your families have been able to be a support to so many kids out there.
Yes! My ex step-grandma adopted for over 30 years! :) she has 28 children. 26 adopted, 2 biological.
I Love Your House and You UA-cam Channel Videos So Much!!!! And I Also I Love Crazy Pieces Too!!!!
Thank you so much for this great video.
I recently finish Adiction study just to help people who have problem with addiction.I know that is not easy for them because they have trauma and people have stigma...they judge them.
You are so amazing.🥰
Hi ladies, love how you are so non judgmental💗wish everyone was like that💗
I am only 17 will be 18 in 2 months. When I get older I would really like to adopt. If I couldn’t I would like to foster. You guys made me want to do this, watching all your videos over the years. This is a dream of mine to hopefully save a child/ teen
I wish I could be adopted in someone's hearts even though I'm 20 :) That's such a huge dream for me. I wish someone would stick with me long enough to get to know me or wanna check in with me even after years, like you did with Connor! Melts my heart.
But, I am so glad you found the boy who ran away - thank you for being normal and empathetic and not having judgement, almost all these kids are just trying their best with unbelievable circumstances.
what state are you in? I can't wait to become a foster parent hopefully by next year, it seems odd adopting a older teen or a young adult as a 36 year old so close in age.
@@renaej im in illinois but i think im going to ny for school :) i dont know anyone in either state well though lol thats the issue, it really breaks my heart sometimes
@@BetteDavis19 aww thats where I was going to move to, I might be going near the IL , Wisc Border not sure if I will end up in IL tho. Look into the springboard program with let it be us, They might be able to help find you a family.
there should be some basic dormitory style housing for people in transition where they can stay while working full time and saving to get their own place..a small individual room with a bed, table, dresser, small fridge and mircrowave....maybe a cafe that serves 1 hot meal per day (due to no individual kitchen facilities....so that it would be affordable to a young person with a minimum wage job.
Great vlog! Very informative and eye opening. Thank you for sharing your experience. Especially with children experiencing trauma. God bless you.
My best friend works with homeless families and after navigating their case, she usually tries to figure out what their trauma is or why they are stuck. Amazing tools that I love to see in action.
I have said before I was adopted by my Aunt and Uncle. I was always lying about something. I was bullied in my home town school and had a dysfunctional family to put it mildly. I wanted to be important and know things already so what I didn't know I made up. It carried on for a while but my Aunt was patient with me. You two are so awesome and I am praying for your kid in prison.
I adopted my son when he was 10 years old he is 15 now will be 16 in May. I would love if you guys could make a video about parenting teens and different discipline ideas for teens and how to deal with all the sass and back talking that comes with teenagers lol love you guys so so much ❤️ such a huge fan of all of you guys families channels. I'm going threw such a hard time lately and your videos make my days better. 💞💯
The "can you drown a fish?" part was too good!!
But those were some good stories and lessons shared!! Thank you!!
I've always wanted to adopt, and thanks to you I now know about the foster towards adoption route.
My question is how do you deal with the dreaded "you're not my mom" during a bad moment for a kid/teen even after being adopted or years of being part of the family, and how does that kid/teen deal with the (hopefully) regret from saying it?
It's always been a fear of mine, knowing that once you hear it you will always have it replaying in the back of your mind even if they didn't truly mean it and just lashed out during a bad moment.
I’m pretty sure Crystal answered in her one of her videos on “crazy pieces” before saying that none of her kids ever said that to her or Aaron, so it wasn’t something she had to deal with. Not sure about Shelly and Jared though
I love your vids here the unfiltered truth thank you mother hustlers ❤️
Love all your youtube channels but this one is my favorite. Thanks for being so sincere.
Oh man, I needed this video! I had been feeling a hard tug to adopt a teen, but was uncertain as I have never parented a teen before. My only kiddo is 11, so we’re almost there and some days it feels like we already are 😅. The catch 22 though is that I’m a (happily) single mom. Also, my daughter really wants a brother. I’m leaning towards another girl…but would love any and all advice.
i remember when you posted the video to reach out to the kid that ran away, and even recently wondered what happened to him. Try to get the contact working, for rehabilitation it is important to have a structured, supportive environment :)
that was so interesting and helpful. one of my favorite videos so far. love to see more
I absolutely loved this vlog thank you so much 💗
Hello Crystal and Shelly-thank you-learned a lot today-enjoyed watching you both-thank you for sharing❤
I told my brother I want to adopt and he ask like what ages? And I told him any age is good.
He said not older ones just bby so you can raise them your way and I told him yes thats a good point but I would love to have older kids to he said why. I kinda explained him and he opend his eyes and said wooow you are so right he was amaized
i wish all the kids in the world will heve moms like you Not perfect but genuineness
Kids and teens shouldn’t be forced to change schools and taken from their friends while in foster care especially when they’re in the same town….. one of the kids we had said most of his trauma is from being forced away and now that he’s over 18 is doing well at home and wished he never was forced away.
Bella explained her and her brother’s situation prior to entering your home permanently and I agree they deserved your warmth and love (like the rest of your kids), Howe, some kids like this girl I know was taken by force at age 10, is now 14 and the court ruled both parents are 100% great but the agency refuses to give the girl back to her parents and instead for the past 3 years she’s need to 50 homes and has been destroyed by this agency and DDS in addition to education neglect as DDS placed her in grade 2 instead of grade 9 where she belongs and recently told everyone it’s the parents fault even though they had her.
Keep up the great work 😊
Love you guys and what you do! Hope you get some more kids soon ❤️
You all are just awesome and so selfless i love it you have the buggest hearts . ❤❤❤
Your support of Connor is wonderful.
SO many goosebumps through this video. it took me 4.5 years to adopt my kiddos because of tprs and stuff...
I love you ladies, I was also in foster care and got emancipated at 17, I was grateful to have a home I felt safe in even though the love was not there, anyways I love watching your videos but your making me anxious standing lol. Love you amazing ladies
Oh my goodness, me too! I love listening and learning from them... but it's so distracting to have them standing there I can't concentrate. They look uncomfortable which makes me uncomfortable.
Wasn't the girl who didn't talk for the longest time Destiny? I remember something being mentioned about that. What you two do is very selfless and awesome for kids who just need love and a stable family.
Yeah
Yup. They made the joke that once she started talking she talked a lot 🤣
@@lesleewhite160 Hannah too.🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣. But it just shows how good and loving they are!!
I love watching your UA-cam channel and all your family’s UA-cam channels.
I love this. CAN YOU PLEASE make a video about parenting adopted teenagers
My favorites I love watching your channels my best friend actually adopted all three of her kids so this is very near and dear to my heart I love watching your stuff and all the stories and everything
Hello Crystal and Shelly thank you for sharing this video with us and your amazing family you are amazing people I appreciate you and everything you do
I would put that "a 1 was added to the 7" down as a God-incidence. He knew what He was doing from the beginning. 🥰
My husband I fostered teenagers for over 15 years. Utah. Living in Yuma now. Look up mayor of Escondio Cal mayor was one of youth who lived with us out of detention
I think the 18 year old age out thing is crazy!
How are they supposed to find a place to live? They don’t have a credit history or savings or a work history. Their choices are basically the military, the streets or prison. So sad!
UA-cam's algorithm has shown me several videos where teens adopted from foster care talk about how much their adoption changed their lives. Shelly and Crystal talked about how challenging fostering or adopting a teenager can be. However, they did not mention how much you change that child's future for the better.
How do you financially care for your foster and adoptive children after they turn 18?
shelly and crystal definitely teens are good to understand
I love watching y’all’s videos. I am so glad that your kids have you both. I’m just wondering, why don’t y’all sit during the talking vlogs? I know it’s something weird to focus on sorry.
This was so informative, thank you!
I'm so glad you guys touched on the whole lying thing. That is so helpful to know! I am curious tho..so you said they'll make like happy things up and over exaggerate things..do kids also do it like making up bad things that happened? If so, is that just as common?
Thank you for sharing this :-) Shelley, whatever happens with Connor. I hope it goes well. Good luck.
Thank you for sharing this!😊
Such great information, thank you for sharing.
Might be a crazy question but why is Shelly always in black?
What amazing and greatful video. Thanks a lot for everything.
You guys talked about some of your past foster kids still being in contact have any of them ever come back to you after they aged out or got adopted by someone else to see you guys again and see all the other kids or even for help
We said no teens too but...our first was a teen girl! We're also trying to get back a sibling group of 3 who lived with us for an extended respite stay. Our current agency kept them from returning to us due to they said, "Causing more trauma!" Super strange. They required us to retrain. However, each placement they had after us kept giving notice to find them another home. We are hoping the local county will transfer us today and we can find them and request them to come back to live in our care❤my heart is really in shambles over them being treated unfairly. The oldest sibling will be 13 this year and they will probably keep them separated. Any advice? Or experience with a similar situation on requesting a respite to come back in your home?
Awesome video I really like it lot it was cool and you made awesome video and you are my favorite UA-cam and you are best UA-cam channel
I’m a foster parent right now. We’ve only taken littles… how do you deal with technology and teens though:/? That’s one of my biggest setbacks of taking teens.
Yay! Love foster care videos!!
Just wondering why are you both always standing in Shelley’s bedroom for the entire video x
God bless all of you for all you do!❤
Been watching you guys receive a letter from This is how we Bingham.
18:40
Maybe it’s the opposite.
I could imagine. She probably hates the whole big intro thing with all the big reactions.
Similar to how I don’t like greetings at the beginning of party’s and rather just get straight back to where we left off.
So I 100% understand this. She probably wanted to ease in without the input of others.
Crystal. It seems your last to placement of kids happened rather quickly. How did you know about these two families needing a family. Savannah and Lucas and Liam, Bella and rylan
I have been thinking as I get older that having kids is probably never going to happen for me due to just family things so I’ve really been considering adopting once I can finally get my own place and stop renting. I’ve even been looking at houses bigger then I need so that I have the room if I decide to go that route. I just have so many questions on everything. Been thinking about maybe going with a sibling set rather then one just cause I want to be able to keep siblings together. Can anyone give me advice on how to find the right ones to come into your home.
This is not on this subject, but why is Mindy in all of crystals crazy pieces and why is Mom and Aunt Bonnie in all of crazy middles do y’all ever switch up?
Oh Shelly I pray you can reconnect! Made me cry. 😢
Great video
Shelly you can adopt Nicole . If she agrees to it and you all she can go to court with you and have them list you as her parents and have her named changed. But all have to agree. Just find the right lawyer to help you with that. I’ve heard of many people adopting adults as their kids even into their 30s
Truley got say im soo glad you got teen. cause thay getforgot 😢 other people would rather have younger ones than older ones cause thay might come with other problems this is soo sad 😢😢 How children where thay come from all types walk life This is sooo sad
THANK YOU!! I am drinking this in!
My Mum fostered I was just a baby learning talking. My Mum fostered little boy a old lady asked in a shop your beautiful. He said my names Gordon f off....my Mum laughed about that for ever. Tho at the time was so embarrassed. She passed away October only 73 x
I'm currently a care leaver and wish I still had the relationship with my Foster family but I don't, I have no one
You are both amazing I adopted three but all babies xxxx
I guess I was a fire starter too then. I don’t know a child who hasn’t started a fire with a magnifying glass.
Oh I wonder who Nicol was. I thought she looked quite a bit like Jacob. If she had red hair they could be twins.🥰🥰
Great video thanks for sharing
When a foster child turns 18 do they have to leave the foster home? That seems like such a young age to send them out on their own. 🙁☹️
Soooo if this CONNER was placed with you, why did he leave? Because he ran away from another home, you couldnt take him in? I don't understand.