Psoriasis sufferer here! As someone who is attending a wedding next weekend, that second story hit hard! Finding a dress that covered up active patches/plaques is so hard. That's one way to quickly end a friendship. Applause to that boyfriend - way to support your girlfriend and have her back!
@@dudeorduuude5211 Yes, I have. I've tried almost all of the ones available on the market (Humira, Enbrel, Skyrizi, Cosentyx, etc). However, these don't always prevent flare ups, so I also have an option to take an immunosuppressant orally that helps calm down any flares that arise.
I too have psoriasis am currently on ilumya (the shot) have tried about 6 diff medications & this one works for me... Something's has really helped since starting this whole things is taking natures made multi vitamins and then separate extra vitamin c pills... Best of luck to you 🤗🤗🤗
My parents got married during the Great Depression. My father couldn't afford an engagement ring and barely could afford the wedding ring. On their 25th anniversary, he bought my mother a beautiful engagement ring. She had told him that the plain wedding ring was the most precious piece of jewelry she owned.
I have my great-grandmother's wedding ring. Just a simple gold band that held them together until my great-grandfather passed. It's not about the ring, and hell with it, it's not about the wedding either.
My husband and I wanted very plain wedding rings. We got silver rings, but it truns out its a silver/nickel alloy and I am allergic nickel. I'm literally allergic to my own wedding ring. My husband still wears his everyday, I can't wear mine for more than three days cause there will be sores on my finger.
As someone with psoriasis, I feel sad for that lady who got singled out about her psoriasis. It's not like you can control it. Glad she has a beautiful partner. 🥰
@@reneekowalsky8337 From what I understand psoriasis is genetic and in no way contagious. However people do sometimes get it as they age, like a genetic time bomb that inexplicably goes off.
I’m so sick of this totalitarian authority people think they get when they get married. Having a wedding does not mean that everyone becomes your puppets to play with and force compliance on them. They are your guests not your pawns.
Weddings are the place where "Expectation vs Reality" happens. They want what they expected, not achieving that is not acceptable. Not getting the perfect weddings in their visuals are the end of the world.
I feel like people show their true colors in such moments because they feel like they'll get away with it by blaming it on "stress" and that being "the most important day of their life" (sad).
@@justwonder1404I just someone under another comment why do people do that. Wait good until it's a special event to be a asshole... Your comment puts it in perspective for me a bit more.❤
@@Magami31 Yep. And the next thing you know, divorce. Seriously, I don't understand why people are so obsessed with a perfect wedding. There's no such thing as a perfect wedding. And even if there is, they're usually the ones where everyone including the bride and groom had a great time.
I was 7 months pregnant at my cousin's wedding and tried to politely decline being in the family photos. She sweetly said that she wanted to remember me being there, and my pregnant belly had nothing to do with who I was to her. Way to make a pregnant lady cry at a wedding 😉
Close to 40 years ago, my best friend got engaged. She asked me and my 2 children (ring bearer and flower girl) to be in her wedding. We (the bridesmaids and her) went to pick out the dresses, had the measurements taken and paid a non-refundable down payment for the dresses. We did this months before her wedding. Fast forward a few weeks or so, and I find out I'm pregnant. So I bowed out of her wedding because by the time she got married I'd be over 6 months pregnant. I was so big the Dr thought I was having twins. She was disappointed that I wouldn't be in her wedding, but she never got angry nor has she ever held it over my head. We have been friends for over 50 years. A real friend takes the ups and downs with you. And doesn't take things to an ugly level.
THAT IS HOW THINGS SHOULD BE, IMO! Like, they’re not an attention magnet, they’re not an incubator, they’re a person! Treat them like a person! I don’t get why some brides/grooms don’t get that, it just doesn’t make sense.
For the final story OP had been engaged for weeks and the step-family knew that, if she did not wear the ring it would have caused a bigger scene of people asking where the ring is; or them assuming that something is wrong in her relationship and that she is not wearing the ring because she is upset.
I also think that persons looking and comparing was the icing on a jealous cake, because OP said that Matt was being cold throughout the night but she thought it was just nerves. So he was obviously in his feelings long before the rest of the party even had something to compare with the "colossal ring".
Exactly! I get wanting a certain aesthetic for the decorations, venue, outfits etc, but wanting a certain "aesthetic" when it comes to actual people involved in your wedding? You should be choosing your wedding party based on closeness and affection, not based on how they look. And honestly, when I hear these stories, I always wonder what these brides look like themselves - are they really that perfect looking that they can demand perfection from everyone else?
I agree! How self-involved and shallow are some people to care about such asinine things!? How long is anyone going to look at ANY of your wedding photos? 2 seconds? 🤦🏼♀️ My wedding planning was super easy (I only really cared about the dress, music, and bar) and everyone seemed to have a great time. We're all going to die someday. Some people have actual tragic circumstances in their lives. I'd say I want the terrible brides to get a reality check, but then what would I listen to while I put away laundry? 🤔
It isn't for most people. As far as those who will exclude people based on their looks, or whatever? Don't pander to their shallowness? Skip the wedding and pray for them. Especially pray for the person marrying the shallow dolt. Unless they are both shallow, then pray for any potential children.
"Normalize being happy for other people! Stop comparing what you have to what someone else has. It doesn't help anybody. Comparison is the enemy of happiness." Perfect statement.
That first story, duuuuude… the bride clearly just wanted to exclude her brother’s husband. It wasn’t about the “aesthetic” at all, you were right on the point. The younger sister made a good compromise, but the bride made it very clear that she didn’t want you there.
Like seriously, he didn’t even make a big fuss out of it, he agreed to a very reasonable solution and when the bride disagreed to the solution, he still did not yell or cause a scene. He did the good thing and just walked away, causing as little drama as possible without having to take the picture excluding his husband in the process. NTA
For some people, they’ll come up with any excuse. Personally, I don’t see it an excuse. It’s not cool to self induce stress and then take it out of them.
My wedding was such a whirlwind, I couldn't tell you what anyone wore much less how they looked. I think unless someone had worn white to my wedding, I was way too happy and busy to notice anything much less how someone's skin looked. God that bride is a witch.
I had friends in casual dresses and some in evening gowns. We didn't even ask our groomsmen to rent suits: we told them to wear a black or gray suit they already owned and have at least two accessories (tie, vest, cummerbund, shirt, socks, etc) that matched the bridesmaid dresses color. I gave everyone color swatches. The bridesmaids also bought a tea-length dress in the color I picked, IDGAF what style, because I wanted them all to be happy and comfortable. And you know what? They all loved it and looked fantastic in the photos.
The brother who left with his husband didn’t “ruin her day.” She ruined her day by being an absolute homophobe. As Charlotte always says, Actions Have Consequences.
Not standing by what is an abomination against God is not being phobic!!! People like you need to get your heads out of your butts and get a clue...just because we hate homosexuality does not mean we hate the person!
That last story cracks me up! I love the line about the stepsister thinking OP was "upstaging her on her special day." Umm, it wasn't an engagement party for the newly engaged couple, it was a family holiday party that your SO happened to propose at! What do people do at family parties? They chat with all the people they haven't seen in a while and find out what major life events have happened. I don't think I have ever been to a large family party where people weren't talking about someone's promotion, new baby, graduation, new SO, weight loss, etc. A large family party is NEVER going to be just one person's special night! If that's what you want, plan a special event for the sole purpose of you proposing and celebrating the new engagement. Oh, but then you'd have to pay for the party instead of hijacking an already planned party. Never mind...
@@Willowy13 it wasn't her sister's "special day", it was a family gathering to celebrate a holiday. Why should OP not wear her ring? And honestly, ppl make such a fuss over such small things. It's a fcking ring
As a person with psoriasis, it's definitely messed up that the so-called friend could be so calluose over something they can't control. There's a lot of stigma attached to psoriasis and it's really horrible how the friend reacted.
Yeah its super shallow. My first thought was, oh dear the itchiness must have been awful. My second thought was, I have a friend with psoriasis, and he has done sooo much extensive research and seen very expensive doctors (not all doctors are equal) and he found out that MAJOR diet changes can improve it drastically for some people (just a few, no paprika, avoid KFCs 11 herbs and spices, no tabasco, avoid red bell peppers, no hot chilli, and more.......) and that I wish I could promote this information more, NOT because of some ridiculous shallow bullsh1t, but simply because it can be a very uncomfortable condition and everyone deserves a little more comfort in life!
This! When I got married, all I was interested in was that everyone felt happy, comfortable and welcome. In my family (& my friends circle), that's how we do things. We had people with everything from psoriasis to spinal injuries, and I was just grateful that they were there to support us. I can not fathom people being mean about a health condition - especially when that person is important enough to you to invite to your wedding! Weddings don't change people, they amplify them - so if they're being judgemental at their wedding, then they've always been judgemental - they've just hidden it up until that point. And when you have "friends" like that then you don't need enemies...Nobody chooses to have psoriasis and nobody wants a flare up or to feel uncomfortable. To treat people any differently because of a health condition is just insanity. Anyone who judges you on a condition you can not control, over your personality, is no friend - and deserves neither your time nor your energy, on their wedding day or any other day 💕
I completely agree with you - there is such a stigma, and it doesn't help when we don't feel accepted by friends and family. This is such an isolating condition, so how this friend reacted was likely so much more painful for the attendee. Shout out to the boyfriend - he's a true gem!
Yeah, that bride was so freaking selfish. The only thing that would bother me about seeing someone with psoriasis is that I would worry about whether they were comfortable. I have sensitive skin that tends to overract to everything but I’m fortunate not to have a chronic skin condition like that because I already itch enough. The idea of someone with psoriasis having to do anything that would irritate it, just to please me, would be unacceptable. I’m still haunted by the memory of the last allergic reaction I had… hives everywhere… ugh! So you very much have my sympathy because I was contemplating death by the time I got properly medicated.
I have extreme eczema all over my body, including my face and it has severely impacted my quality of life. This story really emphasizes why I always feel self-conscious about leaving my apartment. That rude comment would've destroyed me, because I already feel like people secretly look at me in disgust. The bride was a total bitch.
If you were going to be upset over the size of the engagement ring, you have no business getting married. Getting engaged does not mean a large ring. It is the union of two people coming together, combining their families, and making a commitment to each other in front of the people they love.
What you said. I got a simple gold band for my girlfriend/fiance and she was very happy with it. That was over 23 years ago. We have been very happy together (with two beautiful daughters, too) in spite of the simple engagement ring. For us, the ring is a symbol of our love and commitment. A focus on how large the gem is, or other status-related considerations, seems really sad, and completely misses the point.
This reminds me of another AITA story I've read. A couple had a tradition of the man sending his wife a big display of red roses every Valentine's Day. One year, it looked like his order was falling through or arriving late or something, (I don't remember exactly) so he ordered a 2nd bouquet from another flower shop to make sure that she still got her traditional gift that they had established for years. Both bouquets ended up arriving while her sisters were at her house, so it appeared that he was just showering his wife with roses. Then her brothers-in-law got all mad at the husband for upstaging them on Valentine's Day. One of them hadn't done anything, the other had gotten his wife a small bouquet of tulips. It's so immature. If they wanted to be seen as super romantic or whatever, they should have planned something. But the bouquet of roses was a tradition, it wasn't like it was spontaneous, so I'd say it's not THAT romantic. It's the gesture that matters, not the money or the size or whatever. The guy who bought the tulips made the gesture. The other guy only had himself to blame for doing nothing. The sisters had obviously established relationships with their husbands where grand gestures weren't really needed, and now the only reason they wanted it was to one up the sister with the roses tradition. This ring thing is the same thing. Matt and Rachel are all insecure about their ring being smaller, but they totally wouldn't have cared if wasn't for the comparison with OP's bigger ring. It's sad that they let something so superficial take away from the joy of their engagement. It is too bad that all the other people at the party felt the need to make comparisons (though it sounds like they weren't meant in any derogatory way). I guess it wouldn't bother me if I found myself in a situation like that because my taste in rings is different from most people (I hate the solitaire diamond look. So ugly. I prefer a more uniform band.), so if I'd been the sister whose ring people found lacking, I wouldn't have cared because I would like the ring (or at least I assume I would. I assume I wouldn't get engaged to a guy who doesn't know my tastes) and I wouldn't like whatever "gargantuan" monstrosity my sister was wearing.
When I became engaged to my now ex husband years ago, I showed up at work and showed my coworkers. It was 1/4 ct center stone and so many thought it was okay to tell me that they would never accept such a small stone, one told me she already told her bf if he planned on proposing with anything less than a full carat not to bother. I was amazed at the shallowness.
My mom's cousin's wife said she didn't want a ring because she grew up on a farm and was marrying a farmer, so she knew it would get lost, dirty, broken, etc.
My husband proposed to me with a ring he bought at walmart, I could care less if it was real diamonds and gold I was just happy he decided to spend the rest of our lives together and surprise me with something like an engagement ring
My mom criticized my engagement ring because it was too “small” and too “cheap” even though it’s worth almost 1k and for us, who are literally poor, that is a LOT of money and beyond what my fiancé could afford but he wanted to try to get me something as nice as he could. The ring is so pretty to me, but my mom hated it and other family members looked at it with disdain and honestly I am over it. It’s just a stupid ring in the grand scheme of things, the ring itself isn’t even what matters, what matters is the promise and the meaning behind it and it’s literally a beautiful ring even if it’s “small” and “cheap” 🙄 People literally worry over the dumbest things and have the audacity to criticize when they can’t even keep a functioning marriage. *edited for typos
I went to a wedding yesterday and the groom told the story of the proposal. They went golfing in Florida and the ring he proposed with was $7 from Walmart because he wanted to make sure it went through security and in case it got lost.
So many of these wedding stories have brides who get weirdly fixated on the “perfection” of the pictures, going off over things like weight, sexual/gender identity, and apparently even psoriasis. It blows my mind! When I look at wedding photos I see happy people celebrating the union of people they love. Never once have I noticed anything about physical appearance, other than how stunning and joyous they all look. People need to readjust their priorities in life BIG TIME
Yeah I bought my now wife an approximately 2 carat square cut diamond to show she is engaged and a 5.0 something princess cut diamond in hopes her annoying friends would all die of jealousy. Sadly it hasn't worked yet, but I haven't seen one of them for more than an hour total in 5 years.
@@adelucas4824 love this comment & you are not wrong my husband & I have gay mates & they are amazing & such a lovely couple they scrub well & another thing gay guys are so nice plus they generally are the most loyal to their friends backs & will stand up for you as our mates
I was dating my husband when my brother got married. In the months before the wedding, my mother was adamant that my then-boyfriend could not come to the wedding; she and my father hoped we would break up because of a 12 year age difference between us. About a month before the wedding my mother changed her mind because she realized how seriously in love we were. On the wedding day one of the groom’s men could not make it. The photos of said wedding include my husband as the only groom’s man not in a tuxedo. By the way, my brother and his bride got divorced 7 years later. Decades later my husband and I are still together. P.S. My husband has psoriasis which showed up on the pictures.
Congratulations on your happy marriage! I'm glad your parents came around when they saw how much you love each other. Some things are meant to be, kismet!💘 My BFF from middle school to adulthood met her husband in 1978 when she was 18 and he was 33. Before that, she had no interest in boys or dating and neither did I. If the topic came up, we would "joke" that we were going to have to wait until the boys grew up and became tolerable to be around. 😏 Rosie went to work at a cool new restaurant that had one of those huge, magnificent Wurlitzer organs taken from an old movie palace and restored. Bill was a professional interior designer who specialized in theme restaurant decor. He was also one of the few who could play that ginormous Wurlitzer, so even after his design work was completed and the restaurant opened, he had reason to spend a few nights a week at the restaurant as an entertainer. Soon, their flirting was almost part of the show, as they traded witty repartees between songs. They became inseparable and married soon after she graduated high school. They were so funny, kind of reminded me of Jerry Stiller and Anne Meara, the married comedy duo beloved in the 50s and 60s who are parents to Ben Stiller. Bill and Rosie both had a natural talent for improv and I think their humor got them through good and bad times. Even their arguments were hilarious! Most of our friends thought it would never work, but out of all my classmates that I stayed in touch with, their marriage was the only one that lasted until death did they part. As far as the 15 year age difference, that didn't matter at all. She died first, 12 years ago, he joined her about a year later. I miss them both. 🥲
I have a big family, I have nine cousins that are LGBTQ along with myself. When two of us went to my cousins wedding, (who is straight) she put us at a separate table away from our immediate family members near the bathroom. Our brothers were so upset. They took the chairs from the family table and sat with us. There was a card with our names on it, where we were supposed to sit. On the cards were written them. Thank you and your “friend” for attending.
The engagement ring story is wild to me. I understand insecurity and wishing you could provide more to someone you love so much, but projecting those insecurities onto other people is unreasonable. The size of an engagement ring does not effect one's love or devotion. My parents got married when my mom was 17 (and 7 months pregnant with me) and my dad was 20. She was a junior in high school. They got her wedding ring on a Valentines Day sale at JC Penney's for under $200. Her diamond is microscopic but it's real and her band is real gold. It was a really big deal for them at that time for her to even have that. They are 45 & 48 now, still married and earning over 300k a year (very comfortable income in southern Louisiana) My father often speaks of wanting to get her a "real ring" with a bigger and more substantial stone now that they're better off/empty nesters, etc. but my mom said she will never wear anything else. Her tiny diamond in her under $200 ring, the promises they made to each other when they were young, dead broke and had nothing - that is what has gotten them through almost 29 years of marriage and no giant diamond can compare to that for her. Their smaller than sister's ring is just as good, as long as the love is true & honest. Material items are just for fun, it's what's in the heart that matters. I hope they don't let comparisons ruin their wedding and bond as well because this is only the beginning of what sister will have that will be "better" or "more expensive" than what they'll be able to afford in life.
That's literally the point of the representation of the wedding ring in a modern wedding is the signifier of your continuous love for each other and yet for some reason people have turned it, much like they've turned weddings, into a sign of ability to show off money and yes if you want a nice extravagant wedding and ring that's fine but at the end of the day that's not what it should be about it should be about being happy and love!
Beautifully said! And congrats to your parents. We've been married 38 years and my 1/4 ct engagement ring means more to me than anything, as the diamond was my grandmother's. We had it re-set. So what hubby did was get me a 20 diamond stone wedding band on our 20th (smaller diamonds). I got a nice ring which shines pretty, and I got to keep the one that mattered the most to me. (they bands were never soddered, and in fact still aren't as I mean to pass the engagement ring down to a grandchild and the wedding band to our daughter).
My husband spontaneously proposed to me, so I didn't have a ring until he could afford one three weeks later. I could tell he got it second hand through Facebook Marketplace. Honestly, I didn't even need one because I felt the money could be spent better elsewhere, but he's a pretty traditional guy and felt like he had to get one. Getting a small second hand ring was like a nice compromise. We've been married for 7 wonderful years. We don't even wear our wedding bands now. But don't worry; we are still very much in The Honeymoon Phase. 😘 He shows his love for me everyday. He was there for me before we even started dating. That will always be more important to me than a ring.
A wedding is supposed to be a union and party of the family and friends. The fact that these people display the worst behavior is astonishing. Reveal who you are upfront so people can save themselves from the level of disfunction. Who is trying to celebrate with a secret hater.
It drives me nuts help people give brides a pass because "we live in a society" LMAO no. Normal rational women don't suddenly turn into irrational bridezillas when they start planning the wedding. They were ALWAYS like that and have just managed to hide it long enough to get engaged. Just because you're stressed out that doesn't give you the right to scream and take out your anger on other people. In fact if the woman you're going to marry starts acting like a bridezilla RUN! RUN FAR AWAY. Because if she acts irrationally entitled and takes out the stress and anger on other people that is how she will act under ALL stress. And you better believe you're the one who is going to bear the brunt of her irrational anger for years if you marry her. It's far better to cancel a wedding than have to go through a messy divorce.
@@pablodelsegundo9502 facts. Whoever is marrying that person either thinks like them or is part of the problem. It’s only a matter of time that they begin to treat one another the same
Weddings.... And funerals are the events where all the dramas, the tea, begins (or ends) lol. So you should not be astonished. Sometimes I expected something DID or WILL happen (especially knowing my family...) and I lived for that teas.... (I was a wallflower all my life and my family mostly are Divas, Peacocks and Domineering Hens. So yeah I expected something always happen in weddings).
I wish I could give you a hug for every letter of this comment. Especially those last two sentences. And why is that when people DO finally show you who there are it's often at what's to be a joyous event? More times than I'd like to admit I've had people "show out" me on special occasions when they had ample time to tell me how they felt prior in private!
I'm pretty sure for the last one, OP would have been told they were trying to steal their sister's spotlight if OP hadn't worn their ring too. Everyone in the family knew OP had just gotten engaged and would probably have spent the entire night asking questions. "Are you still engaged?" "Where's the ring?" "Why aren't you wearing your ring?" "Do you have a picture of the ring?" "Can you go and get the ring?"
That was my first thought as well. That couple has serious main character issues to deal with. Bets on whose marriage lasts? And it won't be to do with the actual size of the ring. Wait... The groom has issues with size?? 🤔
The first man reacted in exactly the right way. If my significant other was excluded for whatever reason, then don't expect me to take part either. Actually, that decision was taken out of my hands many times; due to my children being mixed race and their father being West indian, we were excluded from a total of five weddings, as well as christenings and children's birthday parties. Try explaining that to children
@victoriabrown actually I was excluded from their lives completely. I am only in contact with my younger brother, the eldest one is dead and the middle one I last saw at my mum's funeral in 2013. The youngest brother has always accepted my children, but the other two? I didn't need them making my three children feel worthless, so it was a pleasure to remove them from our lives.
My female cousin was a high school student and she wore jeans and a letterman jacket to my wedding. I couldn’t care less. I was just happy I had my family there. I did gently tease her when she got married and she laughed and said “I don’t know how my mother let me get away with that. “
Shame on that first bride for being homophobic, and for the family members who agree with her. She unintentionally exposed which family members should be kept at an arm's length from now on. I'm so glad the OP didn't get in the picture and instead left with his husband to try to treat him. I can only imagine how painful that was.
That was awful. At least the homophobes were outed, but it shouldn't have had to come to that. Anyone else in the wedding party could have stood up to the bride about it too! Not a group of people you should be spending time with. Bravo to the younger sister for standing up for her brother and offering a compromise. I know I'd be the first one to go, "Wait a d*mn minute! You can't just exclude your brother's spouse. That's awful! Shame on you."
is there any evidance for homophobia though? ever heared of correlation is not causation?! it is very likely she just dislikes the man for an infinit amount of possible reasons, she did not try to exclude her brother after all and apparently never ever did anything that brought up the idea she could have a problem with his sexuallity or else her brother woul have suspected that to be the reason himself instead of being suprised, when others brought it up! Could she be homophobe and really good at covering it up otherwise . . . possible, but we should be really careful not to act like that is the only possible reason to dislike someone and black people are always right etc the brother was compleatly in the right with leaving early and siding with his husband over her bs, but since he never even considered it, it feels like crying wolf to me to make the issue about homophobia instead her exclusing her brothers spouse
@@Willowy13 you’re right, but the issue was should the couple have left or are they aholes for leaving. The bride doesn’t have to accept their relationship but it’s pretty sad to not accept your sibling to the extent of excluding them from a photo…
That first one really made me mad. Storytime: My husband and I have been married for 8 years. At the time of our wedding, my older sister had been dating a guy I didn't like and who didn't like me. Dude was a jerk and treated my sister like crap. I knew it was important to my sister so he is in all our family pictures. Sure they broke up and he is still there in those pictures, but what mattered was having my sister there beside me happy any having a good time.
I got engaged a few months after one of my best friends. We were both so excited to show off our rings togetherrr ✨ At my engagement brunch we happily explained the style of rings we got since our friends were curious and loved how different they were. We happily fist bumped each other at the end 🤍 I couldn’t imagine asking her to take her ring off because I didn’t want to get outshined???
I had someone remark to once that her husband asked if she wanted to upgrade her ring for their anniversary (20 or 30 years) because many of their friends were doing that. She said no, because that ring was the one he could afford at the time and the one he gave her when he promised to love her for the rest of their life together. It didn't matter that is was small and it didn't matter that they could afford something bigger now.
That last story reminded me of a similar experience that I had. I propose to my girlfriend a few weeks ago and after the ceremony and engagement party my fiance's family was comparing our engagement party to her sister's engagement party and saying how much better mine and my fiance's engagement party was compared to her sisters. It was disgusting!
The engagement ring thing isn't just about insecurity and jealousy, it's that people feel *threatened* by it. We get angry at others when we feel threatened, and we get depressed when we turn that anger inward and apply it to our own self worth. Even more complicated is people can easily be experiencing both of those at the same time. There's a very fine line between a fleeting moment of "I wish I had that" and full on "You're my enemy because you have that".
My sister and I got engaged later in life and very close together. I was told later on that she told her fiance to wait to propose to her so as not to upstage my engagement. I felt so bad, and told her she absolutely did not need to do that, and they can do whatever they want when it's right for them. We are both entitled to happiness, and I would never make her wait to feel special and loved, so I could hog it all. It baffles me. Could never be me.
I remember reading a Reddit story where this woman said her sister got mad at her when she got engaged in the same year her sister did. Apparently OP should have” waited until *after* sister’s wedding, which at that point was was still TBD.
Last story reminds me of a story I read a week or so ago where the engaged couple uninvited a girl from their wedding because she wore white to her own birthday party 2 weeks before their wedding. They felt she was trying to upstage the bride (2 weeks early).
You can pick your friends, you can pick your nose, but you can’t pick your family. He has nothing to apologize for here. You stuck up for your partner! Kudos to you, you did right. Love is love!❤️
You would think she would want to celebrate love with more love. But I guess people will always be peoplein. It just breaks my heart some people can be so close minded.
I always thought the saying was, “You can pick your friends and you can pick your nose, but you can’t pick your friend’s now.” 😉😂🤣 But yours works too! And it’s more appropriate for the video. 😉
@@davidguidry657 There's also the one about how you can prick your finger in public, but you can't finger... oops! Can't say that on YT! I also like the old Redd Foxx joke: What's the difference between a pickpocket and a peeping Tom? A pickpocket snatches watches! 🥁 ba-dum-bump!
That first story made me cry. I reminds me of a a family function that happened when I was a kid. I am 14 years younger than my youngest sibling and the only one who is mixed with black. My mom had already passed away by this time and a bunch of her family that i had never met where all there. Even though I didnt know them they all knew who i was. My mom was kind of shunned by them for having me. I wasnt aware of this though since i was only 11 years old. Anyway, a few of my moms cousins and aunts asked that all of Jerri Lee's (my mom) kids get together for pictures and when i went and stood next to my eldest sister (17 years older than me, and raising me after mom's passing), they shamed me by saying excuse me, I asked for jerri's kids only. My sister spoke up and said who i was and the response was, Oh I know who she is but I cannot have a colored child ruining the FAMILY PHOTOS! This broke my heart and embarrassed me more than anything in my life.
I was crying also, Beloved. And your story made me cry more. I'm so sorry you went through that. People can be so disgusting and cruel! On one hand it's disgusting and hurtful to see and hear how some people really are inside however on the other hand it's heartwarming to know that complete strangers like you and I can come together on this channel to see that there are still good people in the world! Sending Hugs!😘
Omg. I am so hurt and angry this happened to you. No one especially a child should have to deal with this. You have nothing to be ashamed of, they do! You are too good for them. Sending you healing and love!
If she hadn't worn her engagement ring so soon after getting engaged people would've asked if the wedding was off and been gossiping about that the whole time anyway
I'm so glad that when I got married 19 years ago there wasn't Instagram/aesthetic/vibes/hyped bride focused weddings that seem to be the norm now. I might sound like a boomer, but I'm a millennial. I planned a marriage, more than a wedding because I was overwhelmed by eloping.
My husband has psoriasis really badly, like 80% coverage on his body (biologics have helped though) which got the attention of a docuseries where they featured him in an episode. He has mentioned how people have literally thought he was contagious in the past. Part of the reason my husband knew I was the one was because I never made him feel bad about it nor did I act like it was gross or weird. I just can't fathom how people can be so ignorant and rude towards someone who has something that they have zero control over. I'm not sure I would have been able to keep my composure if anyone talked to him like that bride did lol
I can't imagine how exhausting it must be to be a delulu bridezilla, my dudes. I got engaged this year and all I want is simple romance and a bomb ass party with all the people we love. If the day happens without an ounce of dumb wedding drama like this, I will be ecstatic. 😂 Who has time to worry about drama and other people when you can just PARTY. ❤️✌️
As someone with psoriasis and other complications from it, she was so rude I wouldn't have stayed another second. Also if any of my friends or family had heard her say that they would have left too. You can't help it, and op went out of her way with stress and makeup to make sure she would look nice. This just broke my heart. Op doesn't need friends like that and you are 1000% right about her man, marry him!!
It does make me wonder if the bride had ever made negative comments about the psoriasis before. It's kinda strange for her to all of a sudden have such an aversion to a long standing condition. Makes me think she was never really a true friend!
I had a situation one time where I was proud and disgusted all at the same time. Perkins is a restaurant that many people go to after a night of drinking because they have decent breakfast food for real cheap. Our waitress has a condition where her whole body is covered in moles. Most of the customers there late at night are regulars who know her well and know she is one of the sweetest people you could ever meet. Well, one night, some customers came in who wasn't familiar with her ordered their food then started talking loudly about how they didn't know if they could eat it because her face disgusted them. I tell you what- I have never heard so many people jump someone's case, yelling and standing together, kicking people out of a place so fast with me yelling along with them. I was proud we banded together for her yet disgusted that someone could talk about another person like that.
1st story: I could understand if the bride wanted a picture with her siblings ONLY but if everyone else's partners are supposed to be in the picture, then her brother's husband should've been there too. Props to him, seems like he and his husband are very healthy and happy couple
At my sister's wedding, almost 30 years ago, my sister the bride did not want my partner of 11 years in the photo along with our brother and his wife. Marriage was not legal then for us, two women. I told her that I would stay out of the photo, too. She relented. Also, when she was sending out the invites, I told her that I better not get a "plus one" on the invite, that it should be addressed to both of us. If not, goodbye (and I was MOH). My mother made sure that my partner was on the envelopes. Good news is that my sis has chilled about having a lesbian sister since then.
Unfortunately, homophobia is rooted in our society, especially if related to religion. It's one thing to disagree with the lifestyle, but it's an entirely different thing to be a complete asshole about it.
@esmooth919 Not all religion. I attend a Christian church, of a long - standing religion, and our minister(F) is married to a woman. The church members, many of whom are in their 80's and 90's, are all accepting of her, and have great respect for her as a minister.
Imagine if OP hadn’t worn her engagement ring to the party? Everyone would be asking about it, especially after the proposal. I feel like the couple would have been upset by that too.
The AH OP got engaged a full month before and was NOT showing off her ring to her family up to the day the other couple was going to get engaged. She wrote "it was the first time they were seeing it in person". This is the equivalent of wearing white to a wedding. If she was using her ring for that whole month, the other lady could have had her moment without being upstaged by the petty OP. OP was disgusting, petty, tacky and made herself a victim for reddit clout.
@@Willowy13you must be the stepsister or the fiance of the stepsister. Or a troll. A bad one. No bad trolls allowed to comment on this channel. Only people with good reasons to be petty are allowed to comment here 😶
People would be asking more questions if the girl didn’t wear her ring at the family event (since it was already known to all that she’s engaged). Also, after being married for almost 9 years now, I really don’t care about the size of my ring. If anything, we probably should’ve just bought a $15 one off of Amazon and saved the cash.
For real (or not?)! I think only a professional gemologist can tell the difference between a diamond and a cubic zirconia. Spending thousands on a colorless rock that's way overpriced and not even rare seems foolish to me. I found a ring in a parking lot that had been run over. It was easy to tell that the setting was cheap gold-plated metal so it's obviously not real, but the two cubic zirconia it has are really beautiful with a lot of fire. If I put those stones in a quality setting, I don't think anyone would know they aren't diamonds.
There are so many stories of people being angry that someone else is trying to “upstage” them by getting engaged or pregnant or married, etc. right after them… now we have people upset because someone did it BEFORE them? There’s no winning with some people.
My bff got engaged to her boyfriend, gave her a beautiful engagement ring he found in an antique shop. Her cousin, a notorious selfish spoiled brat, almost immediately, like, three days later, took her daddy’s credit card and boyfriend to WALMART and bought a thousand dollar engagement ring to upstage my bff. It made her look even more like a spoiled brat.
I can sympathize with the person with psoriasis. I have eczema & it is not the most aesthetically pleasing thing to look at. However, I have had it since I was a baby & do the best I can with lathering up on lotion & staying hydrated. However, there's only so much I can do. It's a skin condition, like having a birth mark. Not much I can do about it.
His sister is definitely homophobic. I bet she didn’t have a problem with accepting the wedding gift they gave her and her husband. I question the rest of his family’s acceptance too. They shouldn’t be taking his sisters side when she’s clearly being homophobic and purposely trying to exclude the only gay couple at her wedding. I don’t understand why people think just because someone’s getting married then they have the right to be shitty people to anyone and everyone.
good point. They should demand their wedding gift back. And also from now on ANY present given to the sister's family should be "gay". Books to educate about LGBTQ subjects or even just novels with a gay main character, autobiographies of famous/accomplished LGBTQ people. Or just anything with a rainbow on it. I'd be totally passive aggressive about this.
Exactly! If it was about the aesthetic I have to wonder were the couples wearing matching colors? Of course not. Were they arranged by height? Nope. Hair color? No. Age? No. She arranged them by gender. By GENDER. She sent a clear message that the brother should be married to a female. Good heavens she wasn’t even subtle about it!
Exactly. ‘’Your” day isn’t a license to ignore the feelings of other people. Why would you want all the negativity you’re creating on a day that’s all about love? This incident will forever be tied to the memory and that’s a shame.
Second story hit me hard. I have nummular dermatitis (basically eczema) and it covers my entire biceps. As someone with a similar skin condition to OP, I can’t imagine telling someone to leave or to cover up because of something that cannot be controlled. The self esteem that comes with lizard skin is insane. Skin conditions are nothing to be ashamed of…. Even tho it can make me insecure especially while wedding dress shopping. But I’m getting better with accepting it
I was treated the same way with the first wedding. Been with my partner for 25 years and we are married now. It was my nephew’s wedding and we weren’t initially invited! How horrific and tragic. Finally included to the ceremony only. When photos of family happened I wasn’t included in the pics. We both cared for our nieces and nephews their entire lives and have been together before they were born! We decided to leave and as we were getting into our car he invited us for one pic at end with everyone. (non family members) After such cruel behavior we’ve haven’t reached out to my nephew since.
That's horrible. I hate when people just won't let good times be good times and if they want to go back to their belief system(no matter how stupid it is) afterwards then fine! But to hurt someones feelings and to purposely spoil special events is unforgivable to me!
@@SonjaElizabethTeal Thank you sweetie! (I fixed my typo btw) It was very hurtful but now I know who will receive my estate when I pass! 🤣 You realize even if you’re blood relatives, it doesn’t guarantee unconditional love. I appreciate your kindness and support. 😊🙌🏼🤍🌻
@@moonhunter9993 It was very hurtful, but also a lesson of who will remain in my life. Thank you for being so kind to respond. I don’t believe anyone deserves to be treated that way. 😊🙌🏼🤍🌻
@@AimeeAimee444 You are so welcome, Lovebug! Readers Digest story. My friend, K, was getting married. Relatively small infomal ceremony which is at K's and I place of worship. (That lil tidbit will come in handy in a moment.😅) K has a few relatives coming in from NYC and is running late. Asks me to greet her guests as the arrive. Koolbeanz. Milling around I notice a couple, standing close to the entrance looking super confused and super hesitant about coming in. Turns out it's K's cousin and her partner from out of town. Cousin's partner dresses very masculine. Cousin dresses very feminine. Not a huge deal for most people these days.... ...but here's the kicker... In our religion the The Women sit separately from the Men. I walk up and introduce myself. The confusion is of course, S, wants to sit with her partner but doesn't want to make a waves on K's wedding day and says she will just sit in the car until the reception.... (Did I also mention it was at least 102 in the shade that summer?) I, being the non traditional, non conformist loudmouth that my grandmother raised me to be I make an executive decision. "Ohhhh hell no you won't sit any car...get in here with your wife and the rest of us." I usher them both right into the Women's side. Made sure they were over and beyond comfortable. Daring ANYONE to look stupid or say ONE PEEP! I was READY to light into someone's butt! However, it turn out beautifully... ...wedding and reception went on without one hiccup and we all had a blast. After the reception I suggested some local bars and clubs the couple would enjoy during their weekend stay which they said the had a ball in our city that night. That was five years ago, My Friend. And do you know every year on my friend K's anniversary that very same awesome couple send ME a gift for making them feel good and safe that day? I am constantly preaching to the pre teens and teens in my life that standing up for people, especially when it's a touchy situation, is the honorable thing to do. Saying or doing nothing when seeing someone is being obviously treated wrongly or badly or being hurt is cowardly! And I don't associate with cowards! Have A Great Weekend, Beloved! 🥰🥂💝
Something similar to the last story happened to me last year. I got engaged in June and the same week, my cousin invited me to her wedding, which was happening in the same month- in 3 weeks to be precise. When I did go to the wedding, I met a lot of my extended family. While everyone already knew about my engagement, I was meeting most of them in person only at this wedding. So naturally, I got a lot of questions about when my wedding was going to be, my fiancé, etc. But I tried to keep my answers short and tried not to talk to much about my engagement, as I didn't want to take away the spotlight from my cousin, the bride. But my cousin didn't mind at all. Infact, when I went to meet her and take pictures, she was gushing about my engagement and even introduced me to her husband (whom I was meeting in-person for the first time) as "the cousin who got engaged this month" and he immediately congratulated me, asking me when our wedding was going to be. The two of them also said they will be there to help us plan the wedding and celebrate with us!❤ This was definitely one of the best weddings I've been to and I enjoyed celebrating my cousin and her husband's special day! P.S. This is what genuine people look like. They didn't care that I got engaged the same month or that people were talking about it. They didn't let it ruin their ceremony and are happily married now!❤
I honestly can't imagine what goes through these bridezillas' minds. Actively excluding your own brother-in-law from your wedding photos and shamelessly blaming "~aesthetics~" in the first story? A proper solution was given, but not taken. These are your own family members, whether the bridezilla and the parents like it or not. I sincerely hope the OP and husband cut out their toxic family who clearly will not have their backs and live happy lives together. Your videos always brighten up my days Charlotte!
Oh i was waiting for another wedding vídeo drama...with Charlotte's version of course. No one show us the tea better than Charlotte. Congratulations also to her team. The editing of the vídeos and the jokes ALWAYS makes everything even funnier/better. And the face that Charlotte always makes when she is reacting...is priceless! I absolutely Love this Channel! 😌♥️
First story reminds me of my brothers wedding. I was told that pictures would be taken at the venue and not the church, by everyone on the brides side. (Bride, her parents, and all the other bridesmaids), my parents were with my brother. The venue was half an hour from the church. I got a call from my parents asking where I was as I was pulling into the venue. Pictures were being taken at the church. I was purposely left out, even though I was a bridesmaid.
Awe! I pray the sunshines on your face today and you find happiness and beauty in all you see. I’m glad we have Charlotte to take some of the stress of the day away. She and her team are amazingness.
Good morning! I got up and with no shoes or socks on managed to find out that my brother had arrived ALONG WITH HIS DOG WHO IS A VERY BIG GERMAN SHEPARD WHO LEFT A VERY BIG TURD in my hallway which I stepped in with my very small foot...... nothing like a warm pile to step in to start your day. It's gross but I'm hoping you dou didn't have a shitty day like this. Whatever it is,... remember never let the devil steal your joy, if someone doesn't appreciate you then they don't deserve you and sucky day are training days because eventually the day comes when you will be a hero to someone ❤️❤️❤️💫💫💫💫. Trust me. Oh and you just made a new friend because everyone should get a new friend as a silver lining to a bad day so congratulations! You just won a Michelle lol!!! Yaaay!!! 😂😂😂😂😂❤❤
That ring situation is so crazy. It would've caused a LOT of attention if she came without her ring. Everyone would fuss over her more like "oh wow, why aren't you wearing your ring? Did you break up? What happened??"
12:59 I’m sorry everyone knew she was engaged and if she didn’t wear the ring people would have been like oh where’s ur ring? And they probably would have had a go at her for ‘drawing attention’ by not wearing the ring too
Before I got engaged, my soon to be fiancée and I went ring shopping. I tried on all size diamonds, and while I had always joked that I wanted a diamond big enough that I would have trouble lifting my hand. I actually found that the larger the diamond the faker it looked on me (smaller hands). So, I ended up with a smaller diamond. It’s still beautiful and I still love it (25+ years later). I still get compliments on it all the time. Every one is different, every one rings should be different comparing them to others, is just going to make you miserable. And as the last story showed, ruin the time you should have spent being happy.
Man, for the poor guest with psoriasis, I would have gone to the front, grabbed the mic and said "Sorry everyone, just wanted to say bye as the bride told me to go cover myself so people aren't queasy looking at me (maybe add in a little sob and hitch in my voice for extra added effect)" and then nope right the hell out of there. Just thinking about it makes me smile, the bride would look like an absolutely horrific beast.
The first one was upsetting. A good solution was given to respect her "aesthetic" and yet she deliberately wanted ops husband out the picture. That mustve been heartbreaking for both op and his husband to be humiliated like that. Ops husband seems so kind too, how people can treat them like that nonetheless their own family is just so disappointing. I hope op goes NC with them because as much as loosing family hurt, it hurts more to let yourself be disrespected especially when 98% of them even tried to gaslight you for sticking up for your husband.
My best friend has psoriasis but not once did the thought cross my mind that he would have to cover it for my wedding. He was my brides-man while his wife was best woman for my husband. Even if I had thought about it, he would have to wear gloves since it's on his hands.
It kinda feels like the stepsister and her now fiance rushed to get engaged after OP. Because I can’t imagine wanting to hijack a family holiday for a proposal, and then complain that another family member is present wearing an engagement ring they know she’s had for months. If they feel upstaged, they really should seek help as a couple since they decided to overwrite a successful, happy proposal by being jealous of someone else’s possessions.
My word, if these people are going to be like this at their wedding how is life being married to them going to go? Life is hard, married spouses should help one another.
I really love how there is always a Michael Scott popup or insert any time there is a good "that's what she said" moment in all of Charlotte's videos. Props to the editor on the consistency. 😆
That's the wisest thing I ever heard you say Charlotte, "stop comparing yourself and circumstances to everybody else, be happy for other people and their circumstances. You're smart as well as funny.
Stress can also make psoriasis worse and if she was stressing over the concealers that could also have been part of the problem. I have a family member with psoriasis and psoriatic arthritis and it genuinely stinks - I think the boyfriend took home the gold medal on this one though. He is the hero
I don't care if your engagement ring is the Hope diamond 💍, you wear it and wear it proudly! Prepare yourself for a lot of petty future comparisons. Your stepsister and fiancee has set the stage.
Neither of my ex-husbands gave me an engagement ring. My 2nd ex didn't give me a wedding ring, told me I had "enough jewelry already". He also told me not to get one for him because he would never wear it (red flag!). I did get a wedding ring from my first ex, in a very bizarre way that should have also been a huge red flag! He handed me a mason jar that had about a dozen wedding or engagement rings and told me to find one I like. I asked him where they came from, he told me he bought them at antique auctions. Since he did go to a lot of auctions I chose to believe him. I picked a ring that fit, but never wore it because it felt wrong, like bad mojo, cursed kind of wrong. After we divorced, I got a print out of his 9 page rap sheet. He was a "career" burglar who also liked to commit credit card fraud for fun and profit. The reason he went to so many auctions is because that's how he fenced items he stole!
1st story: It’s definitely a homophobia thing. Ran into that a couple times when hubby and I started dating. Kudos to OP for remaining composed. I would have burned that bridge in the worst way right then and there if it were me.
The Engagement Ring story: It was a fancy party for a holiday. Dude and the fiance were just upset due to insecurity over the ring size... And focusing on size over context is how people show their entitlement. :'D
![Lp. Сердце Вселенной #60 РОЖДЕНИЕ ЛОЛОЛОШКИ [Финал] • Майнкрафт](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/YoR0pAV9FVQ/mqdefault.jpg)
The best aesthetic in wedding photos is having ALL your loved ones, and all of them having huge smiles.
damn right!
Exactly! EVERYone in the picture. crowd in!
Right! The aesthetic should be “celebrating love with those you love” homophobia holds no place at a wedding or anywhere really
Psoriasis sufferer here! As someone who is attending a wedding next weekend, that second story hit hard! Finding a dress that covered up active patches/plaques is so hard. That's one way to quickly end a friendship. Applause to that boyfriend - way to support your girlfriend and have her back!
Have you ever tried those immunosuppressants that people with psoriasis have been seeing good results?
@@dudeorduuude5211 Yes, I have. I've tried almost all of the ones available on the market (Humira, Enbrel, Skyrizi, Cosentyx, etc). However, these don't always prevent flare ups, so I also have an option to take an immunosuppressant orally that helps calm down any flares that arise.
I too have psoriasis am currently on ilumya (the shot) have tried about 6 diff medications & this one works for me... Something's has really helped since starting this whole things is taking natures made multi vitamins and then separate extra vitamin c pills... Best of luck to you 🤗🤗🤗
I am so sorry you suffer so much with this condition. Don't worry to much about the active areas. Relax and have fun.
That boyfriend is a prince!
My parents got married during the Great Depression. My father couldn't afford an engagement ring and barely could afford the wedding ring. On their 25th anniversary, he bought my mother a beautiful engagement ring. She had told him that the plain wedding ring was the most precious piece of jewelry she owned.
This is beautiful ❤
I'm a cold cynic until a story like this one comes up😭
I have my great-grandmother's wedding ring. Just a simple gold band that held them together until my great-grandfather passed. It's not about the ring, and hell with it, it's not about the wedding either.
My husband and I wanted very plain wedding rings. We got silver rings, but it truns out its a silver/nickel alloy and I am allergic nickel. I'm literally allergic to my own wedding ring.
My husband still wears his everyday, I can't wear mine for more than three days cause there will be sores on my finger.
My parents had no engagement ring, and they bought my mom's wedding ring at a pawn shop.
As someone with psoriasis, I feel sad for that lady who got singled out about her psoriasis. It's not like you can control it. Glad she has a beautiful partner. 🥰
OP's partner is a rockstar! Keep him!
And wouldn’t it be satisfying if she ended up with it herself?
@@reneekowalsky8337Oooohhhhh, karma sucks doesn't it? 😂
@@reneekowalsky8337 From what I understand psoriasis is genetic and in no way contagious. However people do sometimes get it as they age, like a genetic time bomb that inexplicably goes off.
AND STRESS MAKES IT WORSE!
"Comparison is the enemy of happiness" ....that is SO true, great word, Charlotte!!
She called it immediately. Ring size.
I’m so sick of this totalitarian authority people think they get when they get married. Having a wedding does not mean that everyone becomes your puppets to play with and force compliance on them. They are your guests not your pawns.
Weddings are the place where "Expectation vs Reality" happens. They want what they expected, not achieving that is not acceptable. Not getting the perfect weddings in their visuals are the end of the world.
I feel like people show their true colors in such moments because they feel like they'll get away with it by blaming it on "stress" and that being "the most important day of their life" (sad).
@@justwonder1404I just someone under another comment why do people do that.
Wait good until it's a special event to be a asshole...
Your comment puts it in perspective for me a bit more.❤
@@Magami31 Yep. And the next thing you know, divorce. Seriously, I don't understand why people are so obsessed with a perfect wedding. There's no such thing as a perfect wedding. And even if there is, they're usually the ones where everyone including the bride and groom had a great time.
@@justwonder1404 Yes. It is sad.
I was 7 months pregnant at my cousin's wedding and tried to politely decline being in the family photos. She sweetly said that she wanted to remember me being there, and my pregnant belly had nothing to do with who I was to her. Way to make a pregnant lady cry at a wedding 😉
My best friend was 8 months pregnant when I got married. That was back in 1990 and we are still best friends.
Close to 40 years ago, my best friend got engaged. She asked me and my 2 children (ring bearer and flower girl) to be in her wedding. We (the bridesmaids and her) went to pick out the dresses, had the measurements taken and paid a non-refundable down payment for the dresses. We did this months before her wedding. Fast forward a few weeks or so, and I find out I'm pregnant. So I bowed out of her wedding because by the time she got married I'd be over 6 months pregnant. I was so big the Dr thought I was having twins. She was disappointed that I wouldn't be in her wedding, but she never got angry nor has she ever held it over my head. We have been friends for over 50 years. A real friend takes the ups and downs with you. And doesn't take things to an ugly level.
Awwww
THAT IS HOW THINGS SHOULD BE, IMO! Like, they’re not an attention magnet, they’re not an incubator, they’re a person! Treat them like a person! I don’t get why some brides/grooms don’t get that, it just doesn’t make sense.
Yes my bff was about 8 months along with my little niecey and I love the fact that my niece is so cool she attended before she was even born!!!
For the final story OP had been engaged for weeks and the step-family knew that, if she did not wear the ring it would have caused a bigger scene of people asking where the ring is; or them assuming that something is wrong in her relationship and that she is not wearing the ring because she is upset.
She was staying with them, at their home, yet for two weeks she did not show them? Very weird. She was not wearing it in all that time.
@@tamitami9275 the extended family had not seen it yet she mentioned in the post that she had not seen them before that party after she was engaged
@@McFizzie_67 Oh, I missed it was the extended family! Huge miss on this one! Thank you for pointing that out!
Good point. Danged if you do, danged if you don't.
I also think that persons looking and comparing was the icing on a jealous cake, because OP said that Matt was being cold throughout the night but she thought it was just nerves. So he was obviously in his feelings long before the rest of the party even had something to compare with the "colossal ring".
When did the "aesthetic" of a wedding become more important than spending a fun day full of love with family and friends?
Since Instagram and Likes became a thing
Exactly! I get wanting a certain aesthetic for the decorations, venue, outfits etc, but wanting a certain "aesthetic" when it comes to actual people involved in your wedding? You should be choosing your wedding party based on closeness and affection, not based on how they look. And honestly, when I hear these stories, I always wonder what these brides look like themselves - are they really that perfect looking that they can demand perfection from everyone else?
I agree! How self-involved and shallow are some people to care about such asinine things!? How long is anyone going to look at ANY of your wedding photos? 2 seconds? 🤦🏼♀️
My wedding planning was super easy (I only really cared about the dress, music, and bar) and everyone seemed to have a great time.
We're all going to die someday. Some people have actual tragic circumstances in their lives. I'd say I want the terrible brides to get a reality check, but then what would I listen to while I put away laundry? 🤔
Instagram
It isn't for most people. As far as those who will exclude people based on their looks, or whatever? Don't pander to their shallowness? Skip the wedding and pray for them. Especially pray for the person marrying the shallow dolt. Unless they are both shallow, then pray for any potential children.
"Normalize being happy for other people! Stop comparing what you have to what someone else has. It doesn't help anybody. Comparison is the enemy of happiness."
Perfect statement.
That first story, duuuuude… the bride clearly just wanted to exclude her brother’s husband. It wasn’t about the “aesthetic” at all, you were right on the point. The younger sister made a good compromise, but the bride made it very clear that she didn’t want you there.
yep, her "aesthetic" idea translates to "no gay couples in this picture"
I would have left too
Ah yes, the Homophobe Aesthetic. I'd like to set that particular mood board on fire. 😑
Like seriously, he didn’t even make a big fuss out of it, he agreed to a very reasonable solution and when the bride disagreed to the solution, he still did not yell or cause a scene. He did the good thing and just walked away, causing as little drama as possible without having to take the picture excluding his husband in the process. NTA
I would have left too. And vandalized the wedding cake on my way out
Edit: would do same in the second as well
I have never understood how getting married is permission to be a rude, self-centered, prima dona.
Because "IT'S MYYYYY DAAAAAYYY!!!" (stomps foot)
I will be a bridezilla if my time ever comes, but I will be rude to MYSELF not to everyone who is helping me!
It's definitely not an excuse and it needs to stop.
Right
For some people, they’ll come up with any excuse. Personally, I don’t see it an excuse. It’s not cool to self induce stress and then take it out of them.
My wedding was such a whirlwind, I couldn't tell you what anyone wore much less how they looked. I think unless someone had worn white to my wedding, I was way too happy and busy to notice anything much less how someone's skin looked. God that bride is a witch.
❤
I had friends in casual dresses and some in evening gowns. We didn't even ask our groomsmen to rent suits: we told them to wear a black or gray suit they already owned and have at least two accessories (tie, vest, cummerbund, shirt, socks, etc) that matched the bridesmaid dresses color. I gave everyone color swatches. The bridesmaids also bought a tea-length dress in the color I picked, IDGAF what style, because I wanted them all to be happy and comfortable.
And you know what? They all loved it and looked fantastic in the photos.
@@SleepySuperhero sounds amazing
@@BrianAndresScott Thank you! It was. I highly recommend; it gives nice variety and character instead of copy/paste uniforms like typical weddings do.
That's so unfair to actual witches.
/s
The brother who left with his husband didn’t “ruin her day.” She ruined her day by being an absolute homophobe. As Charlotte always says, Actions Have Consequences.
Not standing by what is an abomination against God is not being phobic!!! People like you need to get your heads out of your butts and get a clue...just because we hate homosexuality does not mean we hate the person!
That last story cracks me up! I love the line about the stepsister thinking OP was "upstaging her on her special day." Umm, it wasn't an engagement party for the newly engaged couple, it was a family holiday party that your SO happened to propose at! What do people do at family parties? They chat with all the people they haven't seen in a while and find out what major life events have happened. I don't think I have ever been to a large family party where people weren't talking about someone's promotion, new baby, graduation, new SO, weight loss, etc. A large family party is NEVER going to be just one person's special night! If that's what you want, plan a special event for the sole purpose of you proposing and celebrating the new engagement. Oh, but then you'd have to pay for the party instead of hijacking an already planned party. Never mind...
The step sisters fiance sounds like a cheapskate or insecure little boy. Maybe both.
Exactly!
But the AH OP was not wearing her ring until the day the other couple was going to have their moement. Couldn't she waait a little more?
@@Willowy13 it wasn't her sister's "special day", it was a family gathering to celebrate a holiday. Why should OP not wear her ring? And honestly, ppl make such a fuss over such small things. It's a fcking ring
Matt probably drives a big truck too, in order to compensate for small “equipment”!
As a person with psoriasis, it's definitely messed up that the so-called friend could be so calluose over something they can't control. There's a lot of stigma attached to psoriasis and it's really horrible how the friend reacted.
Yeah its super shallow.
My first thought was, oh dear the itchiness must have been awful.
My second thought was, I have a friend with psoriasis, and he has done sooo much extensive research and seen very expensive doctors (not all doctors are equal) and he found out that MAJOR diet changes can improve it drastically for some people (just a few, no paprika, avoid KFCs 11 herbs and spices, no tabasco, avoid red bell peppers, no hot chilli, and more.......) and that I wish I could promote this information more, NOT because of some ridiculous shallow bullsh1t, but simply because it can be a very uncomfortable condition and everyone deserves a little more comfort in life!
This! When I got married, all I was interested in was that everyone felt happy, comfortable and welcome. In my family (& my friends circle), that's how we do things. We had people with everything from psoriasis to spinal injuries, and I was just grateful that they were there to support us.
I can not fathom people being mean about a health condition - especially when that person is important enough to you to invite to your wedding! Weddings don't change people, they amplify them - so if they're being judgemental at their wedding, then they've always been judgemental - they've just hidden it up until that point. And when you have "friends" like that then you don't need enemies...Nobody chooses to have psoriasis and nobody wants a flare up or to feel uncomfortable. To treat people any differently because of a health condition is just insanity. Anyone who judges you on a condition you can not control, over your personality, is no friend - and deserves neither your time nor your energy, on their wedding day or any other day 💕
I completely agree with you - there is such a stigma, and it doesn't help when we don't feel accepted by friends and family. This is such an isolating condition, so how this friend reacted was likely so much more painful for the attendee. Shout out to the boyfriend - he's a true gem!
Yeah, that bride was so freaking selfish. The only thing that would bother me about seeing someone with psoriasis is that I would worry about whether they were comfortable. I have sensitive skin that tends to overract to everything but I’m fortunate not to have a chronic skin condition like that because I already itch enough. The idea of someone with psoriasis having to do anything that would irritate it, just to please me, would be unacceptable. I’m still haunted by the memory of the last allergic reaction I had… hives everywhere… ugh! So you very much have my sympathy because I was contemplating death by the time I got properly medicated.
I have extreme eczema all over my body, including my face and it has severely impacted my quality of life. This story really emphasizes why I always feel self-conscious about leaving my apartment. That rude comment would've destroyed me, because I already feel like people secretly look at me in disgust. The bride was a total bitch.
If you were going to be upset over the size of the engagement ring, you have no business getting married. Getting engaged does not mean a large ring. It is the union of two people coming together, combining their families, and making a commitment to each other in front of the people they love.
Here Here
What you said. I got a simple gold band for my girlfriend/fiance and she was very happy with it. That was over 23 years ago. We have been very happy together (with two beautiful daughters, too) in spite of the simple engagement ring. For us, the ring is a symbol of our love and commitment. A focus on how large the gem is, or other status-related considerations, seems really sad, and completely misses the point.
This reminds me of another AITA story I've read. A couple had a tradition of the man sending his wife a big display of red roses every Valentine's Day. One year, it looked like his order was falling through or arriving late or something, (I don't remember exactly) so he ordered a 2nd bouquet from another flower shop to make sure that she still got her traditional gift that they had established for years. Both bouquets ended up arriving while her sisters were at her house, so it appeared that he was just showering his wife with roses. Then her brothers-in-law got all mad at the husband for upstaging them on Valentine's Day. One of them hadn't done anything, the other had gotten his wife a small bouquet of tulips. It's so immature. If they wanted to be seen as super romantic or whatever, they should have planned something. But the bouquet of roses was a tradition, it wasn't like it was spontaneous, so I'd say it's not THAT romantic. It's the gesture that matters, not the money or the size or whatever. The guy who bought the tulips made the gesture. The other guy only had himself to blame for doing nothing. The sisters had obviously established relationships with their husbands where grand gestures weren't really needed, and now the only reason they wanted it was to one up the sister with the roses tradition.
This ring thing is the same thing. Matt and Rachel are all insecure about their ring being smaller, but they totally wouldn't have cared if wasn't for the comparison with OP's bigger ring. It's sad that they let something so superficial take away from the joy of their engagement. It is too bad that all the other people at the party felt the need to make comparisons (though it sounds like they weren't meant in any derogatory way). I guess it wouldn't bother me if I found myself in a situation like that because my taste in rings is different from most people (I hate the solitaire diamond look. So ugly. I prefer a more uniform band.), so if I'd been the sister whose ring people found lacking, I wouldn't have cared because I would like the ring (or at least I assume I would. I assume I wouldn't get engaged to a guy who doesn't know my tastes) and I wouldn't like whatever "gargantuan" monstrosity my sister was wearing.
Love doesn't need to be materialistic. I show my husband love through food. I'll buy him gifts, but he gets more excited with a home cooked meal.
Amen
When I became engaged to my now ex husband years ago, I showed up at work and showed my coworkers. It was 1/4 ct center stone and so many thought it was okay to tell me that they would never accept such a small stone, one told me she already told her bf if he planned on proposing with anything less than a full carat not to bother. I was amazed at the shallowness.
My mom's cousin's wife said she didn't want a ring because she grew up on a farm and was marrying a farmer, so she knew it would get lost, dirty, broken, etc.
My husband proposed to me with a ring he bought at walmart, I could care less if it was real diamonds and gold I was just happy he decided to spend the rest of our lives together and surprise me with something like an engagement ring
My mom criticized my engagement ring because it was too “small” and too “cheap” even though it’s worth almost 1k and for us, who are literally poor, that is a LOT of money and beyond what my fiancé could afford but he wanted to try to get me something as nice as he could. The ring is so pretty to me, but my mom hated it and other family members looked at it with disdain and honestly I am over it. It’s just a stupid ring in the grand scheme of things, the ring itself isn’t even what matters, what matters is the promise and the meaning behind it and it’s literally a beautiful ring even if it’s “small” and “cheap” 🙄 People literally worry over the dumbest things and have the audacity to criticize when they can’t even keep a functioning marriage.
*edited for typos
I went to a wedding yesterday and the groom told the story of the proposal. They went golfing in Florida and the ring he proposed with was $7 from Walmart because he wanted to make sure it went through security and in case it got lost.
Wow! Disrespectful and greed. I fear for whoever marry these gold ds.
I love how step father is more on the side of the girl in the last story than her own mother. He's not a step dad, he's the father
So many of these wedding stories have brides who get weirdly fixated on the “perfection” of the pictures, going off over things like weight, sexual/gender identity, and apparently even psoriasis. It blows my mind! When I look at wedding photos I see happy people celebrating the union of people they love. Never once have I noticed anything about physical appearance, other than how stunning and joyous they all look. People need to readjust their priorities in life BIG TIME
COMPARISON IS THE ENEMY OF HAPPINESS.
well said Charlotte, this is why we watch you. Your heart and soul are so beautiful.
Yeah I bought my now wife an approximately 2 carat square cut diamond to show she is engaged and a 5.0 something princess cut diamond in hopes her annoying friends would all die of jealousy. Sadly it hasn't worked yet, but I haven't seen one of them for more than an hour total in 5 years.
Charlotte is going all wisdom now!
Just imagining the wedding invites saying "We request that ALL married people coming to our wedding remove their wedding rings for the day"
@@obnoxiousbluebird6634
Lol the bombastic audACITY!!!
He respected his sisters wishes to be a homophobe so she should respect your desire to take yourself out of a bad situation.
THIS.
Ya!
They probably looked better than the bride and groom. Gay men tend to scrub up really well
@@adelucas4824 love this comment & you are not wrong my husband & I have gay mates & they are amazing & such a lovely couple they scrub well & another thing gay guys are so nice plus they generally are the most loyal to their friends backs & will stand up for you as our mates
How can OP stay and celebrate her marriage when she disrespected OP's marriage?
I was dating my husband when my brother got married. In the months before the wedding, my mother was adamant that my then-boyfriend could not come to the wedding; she and my father hoped we would break up because of a 12 year age difference between us. About a month before the wedding my mother changed her mind because she realized how seriously in love we were. On the wedding day one of the groom’s men could not make it. The photos of said wedding include my husband as the only groom’s man not in a tuxedo. By the way, my brother and his bride got divorced 7 years later. Decades later my husband and I are still together. P.S. My husband has psoriasis which showed up on the pictures.
Good for you
This story must have hit home for you. I am glad your family came around. Love is just love. And it's beautiful!
Congratulations on your happy marriage! I'm glad your parents came around when they saw how much you love each other. Some things are meant to be, kismet!💘
My BFF from middle school to adulthood met her husband in 1978 when she was 18 and he was 33. Before that, she had no interest in boys or dating and neither did I. If the topic came up, we would "joke" that we were going to have to wait until the boys grew up and became tolerable to be around. 😏
Rosie went to work at a cool new restaurant that had one of those huge, magnificent Wurlitzer organs taken from an old movie palace and restored. Bill was a professional interior designer who specialized in theme restaurant decor. He was also one of the few who could play that ginormous Wurlitzer, so even after his design work was completed and the restaurant opened, he had reason to spend a few nights a week at the restaurant as an entertainer. Soon, their flirting was almost part of the show, as they traded witty repartees between songs. They became inseparable and married soon after she graduated high school.
They were so funny, kind of reminded me of Jerry Stiller and Anne Meara, the married comedy duo beloved in the 50s and 60s who are parents to Ben Stiller. Bill and Rosie both had a natural talent for improv and I think their humor got them through good and bad times. Even their arguments were hilarious!
Most of our friends thought it would never work, but out of all my classmates that I stayed in touch with, their marriage was the only one that lasted until death did they part. As far as the 15 year age difference, that didn't matter at all. She died first, 12 years ago, he joined her about a year later. I miss them both. 🥲
I have a big family, I have nine cousins that are LGBTQ along with myself. When two of us went to my cousins wedding, (who is straight) she put us at a separate table away from our immediate family members near the bathroom. Our brothers were so upset. They took the chairs from the family table and sat with us. There was a card with our names on it, where we were supposed to sit. On the cards were written them. Thank you and your “friend” for attending.
Oh hell no! That’s just a slap in the face. I’m glad you all sat together.❤
People can really suck sometimes.
Flip that table over and take over the bridal table at that point!
They were like "segregation is still fine right?!"
Just had a total lip snarl. Good on ur bros!! Sorry that u'r cousin is a douche.
Vanessa is really hitting the mark with her editing lately, it adds so much humor to the video!
The engagement ring story is wild to me. I understand insecurity and wishing you could provide more to someone you love so much, but projecting those insecurities onto other people is unreasonable. The size of an engagement ring does not effect one's love or devotion. My parents got married when my mom was 17 (and 7 months pregnant with me) and my dad was 20. She was a junior in high school. They got her wedding ring on a Valentines Day sale at JC Penney's for under $200. Her diamond is microscopic but it's real and her band is real gold. It was a really big deal for them at that time for her to even have that. They are 45 & 48 now, still married and earning over 300k a year (very comfortable income in southern Louisiana) My father often speaks of wanting to get her a "real ring" with a bigger and more substantial stone now that they're better off/empty nesters, etc. but my mom said she will never wear anything else. Her tiny diamond in her under $200 ring, the promises they made to each other when they were young, dead broke and had nothing - that is what has gotten them through almost 29 years of marriage and no giant diamond can compare to that for her. Their smaller than sister's ring is just as good, as long as the love is true & honest. Material items are just for fun, it's what's in the heart that matters. I hope they don't let comparisons ruin their wedding and bond as well because this is only the beginning of what sister will have that will be "better" or "more expensive" than what they'll be able to afford in life.
That's literally the point of the representation of the wedding ring in a modern wedding is the signifier of your continuous love for each other and yet for some reason people have turned it, much like they've turned weddings, into a sign of ability to show off money and yes if you want a nice extravagant wedding and ring that's fine but at the end of the day that's not what it should be about it should be about being happy and love!
This is the nicest story I’ve heard in a long time! Congratulations to your parents on their long and happy marriage.
Beautifully said! And congrats to your parents. We've been married 38 years and my 1/4 ct engagement ring means more to me than anything, as the diamond was my grandmother's. We had it re-set. So what hubby did was get me a 20 diamond stone wedding band on our 20th (smaller diamonds). I got a nice ring which shines pretty, and I got to keep the one that mattered the most to me. (they bands were never soddered, and in fact still aren't as I mean to pass the engagement ring down to a grandchild and the wedding band to our daughter).
I would make the same decision as ur mum. Clearly, to your parents, its not just a ring but a lifetime of devotion and love.
My husband spontaneously proposed to me, so I didn't have a ring until he could afford one three weeks later. I could tell he got it second hand through Facebook Marketplace. Honestly, I didn't even need one because I felt the money could be spent better elsewhere, but he's a pretty traditional guy and felt like he had to get one. Getting a small second hand ring was like a nice compromise.
We've been married for 7 wonderful years. We don't even wear our wedding bands now. But don't worry; we are still very much in The Honeymoon Phase. 😘 He shows his love for me everyday. He was there for me before we even started dating. That will always be more important to me than a ring.
A wedding is supposed to be a union and party of the family and friends. The fact that these people display the worst behavior is astonishing. Reveal who you are upfront so people can save themselves from the level of disfunction. Who is trying to celebrate with a secret hater.
It drives me nuts help people give brides a pass because "we live in a society" LMAO no. Normal rational women don't suddenly turn into irrational bridezillas when they start planning the wedding. They were ALWAYS like that and have just managed to hide it long enough to get engaged. Just because you're stressed out that doesn't give you the right to scream and take out your anger on other people. In fact if the woman you're going to marry starts acting like a bridezilla RUN! RUN FAR AWAY. Because if she acts irrationally entitled and takes out the stress and anger on other people that is how she will act under ALL stress. And you better believe you're the one who is going to bear the brunt of her irrational anger for years if you marry her. It's far better to cancel a wedding than have to go through a messy divorce.
Yes, when a wedding turns into a superficial display of controlling your "loved ones", it's baaaad news.
@@pablodelsegundo9502 facts. Whoever is marrying that person either thinks like them or is part of the problem. It’s only a matter of time that they begin to treat one another the same
Weddings.... And funerals are the events where all the dramas, the tea, begins (or ends) lol.
So you should not be astonished. Sometimes I expected something DID or WILL happen (especially knowing my family...) and I lived for that teas....
(I was a wallflower all my life and my family mostly are Divas, Peacocks and Domineering Hens. So yeah I expected something always happen in weddings).
I wish I could give you a hug for every letter of this comment.
Especially those last two sentences.
And why is that when people DO finally show you who there are it's often at what's to be a joyous event?
More times than I'd like to admit I've had people "show out" me on special occasions when they had ample time to tell me how they felt prior in private!
The boyfriend of the psoriasis OP is a keeper. What an awesome dude, sticking up for her.
I'm pretty sure for the last one, OP would have been told they were trying to steal their sister's spotlight if OP hadn't worn their ring too. Everyone in the family knew OP had just gotten engaged and would probably have spent the entire night asking questions. "Are you still engaged?" "Where's the ring?" "Why aren't you wearing your ring?" "Do you have a picture of the ring?" "Can you go and get the ring?"
That was my first thought as well. That couple has serious main character issues to deal with.
Bets on whose marriage lasts? And it won't be to do with the actual size of the ring.
Wait... The groom has issues with size?? 🤔
“You’re getting married. This isn’t vogue.” Wise words Charlotte.
The first man reacted in exactly the right way. If my significant other was excluded for whatever reason, then don't expect me to take part either. Actually, that decision was taken out of my hands many times; due to my children being mixed race and their father being West indian, we were excluded from a total of five weddings, as well as christenings and children's birthday parties. Try explaining that to children
Oh my I'm so sorry it 2023 people need to wake up and realize we are all the same we all bled red
Most importantly it's their SPOUSE.
Oh my word that's awful. Fantastic that you've stuck by each other regardless. Some people are just gross.
@victoriabrown actually I was excluded from their lives completely. I am only in contact with my younger brother, the eldest one is dead and the middle one I last saw at my mum's funeral in 2013. The youngest brother has always accepted my children, but the other two? I didn't need them making my three children feel worthless, so it was a pleasure to remove them from our lives.
I was so happy on my wedding day and exhausted I couldn’t have cared less about anything the guests wore didn’t wear or who they were with.
Same
My female cousin was a high school student and she wore jeans and a letterman jacket to my wedding. I couldn’t care less. I was just happy I had my family there. I did gently tease her when she got married and she laughed and said “I don’t know how my mother let me get away with that. “
Shame on that first bride for being homophobic, and for the family members who agree with her. She unintentionally exposed which family members should be kept at an arm's length from now on. I'm so glad the OP didn't get in the picture and instead left with his husband to try to treat him. I can only imagine how painful that was.
Well at least now the couple know who really accepts and loves them 😏
That was awful. At least the homophobes were outed, but it shouldn't have had to come to that. Anyone else in the wedding party could have stood up to the bride about it too! Not a group of people you should be spending time with. Bravo to the younger sister for standing up for her brother and offering a compromise. I know I'd be the first one to go, "Wait a d*mn minute! You can't just exclude your brother's spouse. That's awful! Shame on you."
is there any evidance for homophobia though? ever heared of correlation is not causation?! it is very likely she just dislikes the man for an infinit amount of possible reasons, she did not try to exclude her brother after all and apparently never ever did anything that brought up the idea she could have a problem with his sexuallity or else her brother woul have suspected that to be the reason himself instead of being suprised, when others brought it up! Could she be homophobe and really good at covering it up otherwise . . . possible, but we should be really careful not to act like that is the only possible reason to dislike someone and black people are always right etc
the brother was compleatly in the right with leaving early and siding with his husband over her bs, but since he never even considered it, it feels like crying wolf to me to make the issue about homophobia instead her exclusing her brothers spouse
Boo hoo! She didn't want the couple in her pictures. Nobody has any obligation to accept it.
@@Willowy13 you’re right, but the issue was should the couple have left or are they aholes for leaving. The bride doesn’t have to accept their relationship but it’s pretty sad to not accept your sibling to the extent of excluding them from a photo…
That first one really made me mad.
Storytime: My husband and I have been married for 8 years. At the time of our wedding, my older sister had been dating a guy I didn't like and who didn't like me. Dude was a jerk and treated my sister like crap. I knew it was important to my sister so he is in all our family pictures. Sure they broke up and he is still there in those pictures, but what mattered was having my sister there beside me happy any having a good time.
I got engaged a few months after one of my best friends. We were both so excited to show off our rings togetherrr ✨ At my engagement brunch we happily explained the style of rings we got since our friends were curious and loved how different they were. We happily fist bumped each other at the end 🤍 I couldn’t imagine asking her to take her ring off because I didn’t want to get outshined???
Give us the "normalize being happy for other people" merch PLEASE!!
I would buy that for sure
Yes! I LOVE this idea!
Ooh, good idea!
I came to say that same thing.
I'd definitely buy one!
I had someone remark to once that her husband asked if she wanted to upgrade her ring for their anniversary (20 or 30 years) because many of their friends were doing that. She said no, because that ring was the one he could afford at the time and the one he gave her when he promised to love her for the rest of their life together. It didn't matter that is was small and it didn't matter that they could afford something bigger now.
I never understood how people could change and pick out a new ring. It may represent the same as the OG but it doesn't have the same meaning.
That last story reminded me of a similar experience that I had. I propose to my girlfriend a few weeks ago and after the ceremony and engagement party my fiance's family was comparing our engagement party to her sister's engagement party and saying how much better mine and my fiance's engagement party was compared to her sisters. It was disgusting!
That's really sad and creates a lot of competitiveness between siblings... maybe they've always done that
Yeah, we are both Asian. It's sad that it's a common practice in a lot of Asian families..
@@ToughBeifong Sorry to hear that. Just don't play the game...
The engagement ring thing isn't just about insecurity and jealousy, it's that people feel *threatened* by it. We get angry at others when we feel threatened, and we get depressed when we turn that anger inward and apply it to our own self worth. Even more complicated is people can easily be experiencing both of those at the same time.
There's a very fine line between a fleeting moment of "I wish I had that" and full on "You're my enemy because you have that".
My sister and I got engaged later in life and very close together. I was told later on that she told her fiance to wait to propose to her so as not to upstage my engagement. I felt so bad, and told her she absolutely did not need to do that, and they can do whatever they want when it's right for them. We are both entitled to happiness, and I would never make her wait to feel special and loved, so I could hog it all. It baffles me. Could never be me.
MORE WEDDING CHAOS!!! YASSSSSS!!
I remember reading a Reddit story where this woman said her sister got mad at her when she got engaged in the same year her sister did. Apparently OP should have” waited until *after* sister’s wedding, which at that point was was still TBD.
The engagement ring one...I would have laughed in their faces and told them to get over their jealousy.
Last story reminds me of a story I read a week or so ago where the engaged couple uninvited a girl from their wedding because she wore white to her own birthday party 2 weeks before their wedding. They felt she was trying to upstage the bride (2 weeks early).
Around 12' the Michael Scott appearances made me laugh ! I heard the "that's what she said" in my head🤣
You can pick your friends, you can pick your nose, but you can’t pick your family.
He has nothing to apologize for here. You stuck up for your partner! Kudos to you, you did right. Love is love!❤️
You would think she would want to celebrate love with more love. But I guess people will always be peoplein. It just breaks my heart some people can be so close minded.
I always thought the saying was, “You can pick your friends and you can pick your nose, but you can’t pick your friend’s now.” 😉😂🤣 But yours works too! And it’s more appropriate for the video. 😉
Sure, you can definitely pick your family! You just can't pick your relatives. But yes, 1st guy did the correct thing, and I hate his sister.
@@davidguidry657 There's also the one about how you can prick your finger in public, but you can't finger... oops! Can't say that on YT!
I also like the old Redd Foxx joke:
What's the difference between a pickpocket and a peeping Tom?
A pickpocket snatches watches!
🥁 ba-dum-bump!
@@LazyIRanch 😂🤣
That first story made me cry. I reminds me of a a family function that happened when I was a kid. I am 14 years younger than my youngest sibling and the only one who is mixed with black. My mom had already passed away by this time and a bunch of her family that i had never met where all there. Even though I didnt know them they all knew who i was. My mom was kind of shunned by them for having me. I wasnt aware of this though since i was only 11 years old. Anyway, a few of my moms cousins and aunts asked that all of Jerri Lee's (my mom) kids get together for pictures and when i went and stood next to my eldest sister (17 years older than me, and raising me after mom's passing), they shamed me by saying excuse me, I asked for jerri's kids only. My sister spoke up and said who i was and the response was, Oh I know who she is but I cannot have a colored child ruining the FAMILY PHOTOS! This broke my heart and embarrassed me more than anything in my life.
I was crying also, Beloved. And your story made me cry more.
I'm so sorry you went through that. People can be so disgusting and cruel!
On one hand it's disgusting and hurtful to see and hear how some people really are inside however on the other hand it's heartwarming to know that complete strangers like you and I can come together on this channel to see that there are still good people in the world!
Sending Hugs!😘
omg that is horrible what happened to u
What was their response when you didn’t go along with what they were saying?
U can come to my renewal and get in all my pictures cousin❤️ I'm sending love and light and healing somethings u just don't forget 🙏 ❤️
Omg. I am so hurt and angry this happened to you. No one especially a child should have to deal with this. You have nothing to be ashamed of, they do! You are too good for them. Sending you healing and love!
If she hadn't worn her engagement ring so soon after getting engaged people would've asked if the wedding was off and been gossiping about that the whole time anyway
Good point. And people probably also wanted to see the ring and congratulate her, which is what people usually do at extended family gatherings.
💯
I'm so glad that when I got married 19 years ago there wasn't Instagram/aesthetic/vibes/hyped bride focused weddings that seem to be the norm now. I might sound like a boomer, but I'm a millennial. I planned a marriage, more than a wedding because I was overwhelmed by eloping.
My husband has psoriasis really badly, like 80% coverage on his body (biologics have helped though) which got the attention of a docuseries where they featured him in an episode. He has mentioned how people have literally thought he was contagious in the past. Part of the reason my husband knew I was the one was because I never made him feel bad about it nor did I act like it was gross or weird. I just can't fathom how people can be so ignorant and rude towards someone who has something that they have zero control over. I'm not sure I would have been able to keep my composure if anyone talked to him like that bride did lol
I can't imagine how exhausting it must be to be a delulu bridezilla, my dudes. I got engaged this year and all I want is simple romance and a bomb ass party with all the people we love. If the day happens without an ounce of dumb wedding drama like this, I will be ecstatic. 😂
Who has time to worry about drama and other people when you can just PARTY. ❤️✌️
As someone with psoriasis and other complications from it, she was so rude I wouldn't have stayed another second. Also if any of my friends or family had heard her say that they would have left too. You can't help it, and op went out of her way with stress and makeup to make sure she would look nice. This just broke my heart. Op doesn't need friends like that and you are 1000% right about her man, marry him!!
I am sorry you suffer too. I totally agree.
It does make me wonder if the bride had ever made negative comments about the psoriasis before. It's kinda strange for her to all of a sudden have such an aversion to a long standing condition. Makes me think she was never really a true friend!
I had a situation one time where I was proud and disgusted all at the same time. Perkins is a restaurant that many people go to after a night of drinking because they have decent breakfast food for real cheap. Our waitress has a condition where her whole body is covered in moles. Most of the customers there late at night are regulars who know her well and know she is one of the sweetest people you could ever meet. Well, one night, some customers came in who wasn't familiar with her ordered their food then started talking loudly about how they didn't know if they could eat it because her face disgusted them. I tell you what- I have never heard so many people jump someone's case, yelling and standing together, kicking people out of a place so fast with me yelling along with them. I was proud we banded together for her yet disgusted that someone could talk about another person like that.
Yayyyy!!°°°°°°
I wish I had been there!
1st story:
I could understand if the bride wanted a picture with her siblings ONLY but if everyone else's partners are supposed to be in the picture, then her brother's husband should've been there too. Props to him, seems like he and his husband are very healthy and happy couple
NORMALIZE BEING HAPPY FOR OTHER PEOPLE
love and appreciate you Charlotte ❤️
Other people's happiness is not taken from yours.
@@perjus might even say others being happy can add to your happiness
At my sister's wedding, almost 30 years ago, my sister the bride did not want my partner of 11 years in the photo along with our brother and his wife. Marriage was not legal then for us, two women. I told her that I would stay out of the photo, too. She relented. Also, when she was sending out the invites, I told her that I better not get a "plus one" on the invite, that it should be addressed to both of us. If not, goodbye (and I was MOH). My mother made sure that my partner was on the envelopes. Good news is that my sis has chilled about having a lesbian sister since then.
Good for standing your ground and I'm so glad your mom did the right thing. NO degree of homophobia is acceptable.
Unfortunately, homophobia is rooted in our society, especially if related to religion. It's one thing to disagree with the lifestyle, but it's an entirely different thing to be a complete asshole about it.
@esmooth919 Not all religion. I attend a Christian church, of a long - standing religion, and our minister(F) is married to a woman. The church members, many of whom are in their 80's and 90's, are all accepting of her, and have great respect for her as a minister.
But she's the plus 1 as she's not blood related nd coming via you into the fam nd wedding.
In this you was the zilla
Imagine if OP hadn’t worn her engagement ring to the party? Everyone would be asking about it, especially after the proposal. I feel like the couple would have been upset by that too.
The AH OP got engaged a full month before and was NOT showing off her ring to her family up to the day the other couple was going to get engaged. She wrote "it was the first time they were seeing it in person".
This is the equivalent of wearing white to a wedding. If she was using her ring for that whole month, the other lady could have had her moment without being upstaged by the petty OP.
OP was disgusting, petty, tacky and made herself a victim for reddit clout.
@@Willowy13you must be the stepsister or the fiance of the stepsister. Or a troll. A bad one. No bad trolls allowed to comment on this channel. Only people with good reasons to be petty are allowed to comment here 😶
@@Willowy13 it sounds like you’re the jealous sister with the small diamond lmao get over yourself
People would be asking more questions if the girl didn’t wear her ring at the family event (since it was already known to all that she’s engaged). Also, after being married for almost 9 years now, I really don’t care about the size of my ring. If anything, we probably should’ve just bought a $15 one off of Amazon and saved the cash.
For real (or not?)! I think only a professional gemologist can tell the difference between a diamond and a cubic zirconia. Spending thousands on a colorless rock that's way overpriced and not even rare seems foolish to me.
I found a ring in a parking lot that had been run over. It was easy to tell that the setting was cheap gold-plated metal so it's obviously not real, but the two cubic zirconia it has are really beautiful with a lot of fire. If I put those stones in a quality setting, I don't think anyone would know they aren't diamonds.
That engagement ring story...... I would wear that Ring Candy in the photo to emphasise the entitlement hahaha
A++ for editing!! laughd so hard at Gandalf!!
There are so many stories of people being angry that someone else is trying to “upstage” them by getting engaged or pregnant or married, etc. right after them… now we have people upset because someone did it BEFORE them? There’s no winning with some people.
Well, they could have waited until next life to get engaged, couldn't they?
My bff got engaged to her boyfriend, gave her a beautiful engagement ring he found in an antique shop. Her cousin, a notorious selfish spoiled brat, almost immediately, like, three days later, took her daddy’s credit card and boyfriend to WALMART and bought a thousand dollar engagement ring to upstage my bff.
It made her look even more like a spoiled brat.
I can sympathize with the person with psoriasis. I have eczema & it is not the most aesthetically pleasing thing to look at. However, I have had it since I was a baby & do the best I can with lathering up on lotion & staying hydrated. However, there's only so much I can do.
It's a skin condition, like having a birth mark. Not much I can do about it.
His sister is definitely homophobic. I bet she didn’t have a problem with accepting the wedding gift they gave her and her husband. I question the rest of his family’s acceptance too. They shouldn’t be taking his sisters side when she’s clearly being homophobic and purposely trying to exclude the only gay couple at her wedding. I don’t understand why people think just because someone’s getting married then they have the right to be shitty people to anyone and everyone.
good point. They should demand their wedding gift back. And also from now on ANY present given to the sister's family should be "gay". Books to educate about LGBTQ subjects or even just novels with a gay main character, autobiographies of famous/accomplished LGBTQ people. Or just anything with a rainbow on it. I'd be totally passive aggressive about this.
@@moonhunter9993 lmao I'd do that too :D
Maplethorpe photo book... @@moonhunter9993
Exactly! If it was about the aesthetic I have to wonder were the couples wearing matching colors? Of course not. Were they arranged by height? Nope. Hair color? No. Age? No. She arranged them by gender. By GENDER. She sent a clear message that the brother should be married to a female. Good heavens she wasn’t even subtle about it!
Exactly. ‘’Your” day isn’t a license to ignore the feelings of other people. Why would you want all the negativity you’re creating on a day that’s all about love? This incident will forever be tied to the memory and that’s a shame.
"Comparison is the enemy of hapiness"
Well said Charlotte!
Second story hit me hard. I have nummular dermatitis (basically eczema) and it covers my entire biceps. As someone with a similar skin condition to OP, I can’t imagine telling someone to leave or to cover up because of something that cannot be controlled. The self esteem that comes with lizard skin is insane.
Skin conditions are nothing to be ashamed of…. Even tho it can make me insecure especially while wedding dress shopping. But I’m getting better with accepting it
Vanessa killed this edit. I laughed so hard at the Gandalf, "it's quite cool" insert 😂
Rachel will have a special note on her wedding invites: No engagement or wedding rings can be worn. She’s mad as a wet hen!!!
I was treated the same way with the first wedding. Been with my partner for 25 years and we are married now.
It was my nephew’s wedding and we weren’t initially invited! How horrific and tragic. Finally included to the ceremony only.
When photos of family happened I wasn’t included in the pics.
We both cared for our nieces and nephews their entire lives and have been together before they were born!
We decided to leave and as we were getting into our car he invited us for one pic at end with everyone. (non family members)
After such cruel behavior we’ve haven’t reached out to my nephew since.
I am so sorry they treated you this way. You didn't deserve it.
That's horrible. I hate when people just won't let good times be good times and if they want to go back to their belief system(no matter how stupid it is) afterwards then fine!
But to hurt someones feelings and to purposely
spoil special events is unforgivable to me!
@@SonjaElizabethTeal Thank you sweetie! (I fixed my typo btw)
It was very hurtful but now I know who will receive my estate when I pass! 🤣
You realize even if you’re blood relatives, it doesn’t guarantee unconditional love.
I appreciate your kindness and support.
😊🙌🏼🤍🌻
@@moonhunter9993 It was very hurtful, but also a lesson of who will remain in my life.
Thank you for being so kind to respond. I don’t believe anyone deserves to be treated that way.
😊🙌🏼🤍🌻
@@AimeeAimee444
You are so welcome, Lovebug!
Readers Digest story.
My friend, K, was getting married.
Relatively small infomal ceremony which is at K's and I place of worship.
(That lil tidbit will come in handy in a moment.😅)
K has a few relatives coming in from NYC and is running late.
Asks me to greet her guests as the arrive.
Koolbeanz.
Milling around I notice a couple, standing close to the entrance looking super confused and super hesitant about coming in.
Turns out it's K's cousin and her partner from
out of town.
Cousin's partner dresses very masculine.
Cousin dresses very feminine.
Not a huge deal for most people these days....
...but here's the kicker...
In our religion the The Women sit separately from the Men.
I walk up and introduce myself.
The confusion is of course, S, wants to sit with her partner but doesn't want to make a waves on K's wedding day and says she will just sit in the car until the reception....
(Did I also mention it was at least 102 in the shade that summer?)
I, being the non traditional, non conformist loudmouth that my grandmother raised me to be I make an executive decision.
"Ohhhh hell no you won't sit any car...get in here with your wife and the rest of us."
I usher them both right into the Women's side.
Made sure they were over and beyond comfortable.
Daring ANYONE to look stupid or say ONE PEEP!
I was READY to light into someone's butt!
However, it turn out beautifully...
...wedding and reception went on without one hiccup and we all had a blast. After the reception I suggested some local bars and clubs the couple would enjoy during their weekend stay which they said the had a ball in our city that night.
That was five years ago, My Friend.
And do you know every year on my friend K's anniversary that very same awesome couple send ME a gift for making them feel good and safe that day?
I am constantly preaching to the pre teens and teens in my life that standing up for people, especially when it's a touchy situation, is the honorable thing to do. Saying or doing nothing when seeing someone is being obviously treated wrongly or badly or being hurt
is cowardly! And I don't associate with cowards!
Have A Great Weekend, Beloved!
🥰🥂💝
Something similar to the last story happened to me last year. I got engaged in June and the same week, my cousin invited me to her wedding, which was happening in the same month- in 3 weeks to be precise. When I did go to the wedding, I met a lot of my extended family. While everyone already knew about my engagement, I was meeting most of them in person only at this wedding. So naturally, I got a lot of questions about when my wedding was going to be, my fiancé, etc. But I tried to keep my answers short and tried not to talk to much about my engagement, as I didn't want to take away the spotlight from my cousin, the bride. But my cousin didn't mind at all. Infact, when I went to meet her and take pictures, she was gushing about my engagement and even introduced me to her husband (whom I was meeting in-person for the first time) as "the cousin who got engaged this month" and he immediately congratulated me, asking me when our wedding was going to be. The two of them also said they will be there to help us plan the wedding and celebrate with us!❤
This was definitely one of the best weddings I've been to and I enjoyed celebrating my cousin and her husband's special day!
P.S. This is what genuine people look like. They didn't care that I got engaged the same month or that people were talking about it. They didn't let it ruin their ceremony and are happily married now!❤
Laughed so loud when I saw James and Logan pop up!!!! 😂😂😂😂 Hell yeah to BTR ❤❤❤❤
I honestly can't imagine what goes through these bridezillas' minds. Actively excluding your own brother-in-law from your wedding photos and shamelessly blaming "~aesthetics~" in the first story? A proper solution was given, but not taken. These are your own family members, whether the bridezilla and the parents like it or not. I sincerely hope the OP and husband cut out their toxic family who clearly will not have their backs and live happy lives together.
Your videos always brighten up my days Charlotte!
I absolutely agree with you on both points
Oh i was waiting for another wedding vídeo drama...with Charlotte's version of course. No one show us the tea better than Charlotte. Congratulations also to her team. The editing of the vídeos and the jokes ALWAYS makes everything even funnier/better. And the face that Charlotte always makes when she is reacting...is priceless! I absolutely Love this Channel! 😌♥️
It is life. A lil coffee, a lil 💚, and a lot of Charlotte and her team.
Edited because of fat thumbs.
I 💯 agree with you well said
@@BrianAndresScott thank you!
@@erikarussell1142 everything is better with Charlotte!
First story reminds me of my brothers wedding. I was told that pictures would be taken at the venue and not the church, by everyone on the brides side. (Bride, her parents, and all the other bridesmaids), my parents were with my brother. The venue was half an hour from the church. I got a call from my parents asking where I was as I was pulling into the venue. Pictures were being taken at the church. I was purposely left out, even though I was a bridesmaid.
😡what a shitty thing to do ....
I hope the truth came out about what they did to you? What a shitty thing to do.
Sorry, they suck, and Ima need a Part 2.
Does ur brother leave her yet
I looooove your editor. So funny, really takes your videos to the next level.
"Comparison is the enemy of happiness." Charlotte, we need that quote on some merch ASAP.
'comparison is the thief of joy' is often attributed to Theodore Roosevelt... Which is basically what she said.
I’m honestly having such a terrible day but seeing Charlotte post always makes my day brighter. Love you petty sis 🖤
Hope your day gets better, and also, me too. Charlotte makes my days! ❤
I hope that your day begins to turn around from here 💗
Awe! I pray the sunshines on your face today and you find happiness and beauty in all you see. I’m glad we have Charlotte to take some of the stress of the day away. She and her team are amazingness.
Good morning! I got up and with no shoes or socks on managed to find out that my brother had arrived ALONG WITH HIS DOG WHO IS A VERY BIG GERMAN SHEPARD WHO LEFT A VERY BIG TURD in my hallway which I stepped in with my very small foot...... nothing like a warm pile to step in to start your day. It's gross but I'm hoping you dou didn't have a shitty day like this. Whatever it is,... remember never let the devil steal your joy, if someone doesn't appreciate you then they don't deserve you and sucky day are training days because eventually the day comes when you will be a hero to someone ❤️❤️❤️💫💫💫💫. Trust me. Oh and you just made a new friend because everyone should get a new friend as a silver lining to a bad day so congratulations! You just won a Michelle lol!!! Yaaay!!! 😂😂😂😂😂❤❤
Hope you have better days going forward 🫂 ❤
I can't stand when people think that their life events are allowed to take over everyone else's lives. No, Karen, I have my own stuff going on.
Well, it is easy to see how well matched the engagement ring kids are. Bring popcorn to the crapshow that will be the wedding, zilla on zilla.
This channel and these comments are EXACTLY why I love I think of Charlotte subscribers as my real tribe!
You Potatoes Are The Absolute Best!❤
That ring situation is so crazy. It would've caused a LOT of attention if she came without her ring. Everyone would fuss over her more like "oh wow, why aren't you wearing your ring? Did you break up? What happened??"
I love that her boyfriend defends her and says hey we're going
12:59 I’m sorry everyone knew she was engaged and if she didn’t wear the ring people would have been like oh where’s ur ring? And they probably would have had a go at her for ‘drawing attention’ by not wearing the ring too
The way you held up the wrong hand when you said “take the L” with such confidence 😭🤝
Did she though? It spelled and "L". I'm confused.
EDIT: UA-cam ads made me miss the first bit.
Before I got engaged, my soon to be fiancée and I went ring shopping. I tried on all size diamonds, and while I had always joked that I wanted a diamond big enough that I would have trouble lifting my hand. I actually found that the larger the diamond the faker it looked on me (smaller hands). So, I ended up with a smaller diamond. It’s still beautiful and I still love it (25+ years later). I still get compliments on it all the time. Every one is different, every one rings should be different comparing them to others, is just going to make you miserable. And as the last story showed, ruin the time you should have spent being happy.
Man, for the poor guest with psoriasis, I would have gone to the front, grabbed the mic and said "Sorry everyone, just wanted to say bye as the bride told me to go cover myself so people aren't queasy looking at me (maybe add in a little sob and hitch in my voice for extra added effect)" and then nope right the hell out of there. Just thinking about it makes me smile, the bride would look like an absolutely horrific beast.
Lol I like the you embarrass me I embarrass you to an even greater degree vibe here..
The first one was upsetting. A good solution was given to respect her "aesthetic" and yet she deliberately wanted ops husband out the picture. That mustve been heartbreaking for both op and his husband to be humiliated like that. Ops husband seems so kind too, how people can treat them like that nonetheless their own family is just so disappointing. I hope op goes NC with them because as much as loosing family hurt, it hurts more to let yourself be disrespected especially when 98% of them even tried to gaslight you for sticking up for your husband.
There's really something about being a bride that makes a lot of women think they have a free pass to be their true, horrible selves.
My best friend has psoriasis but not once did the thought cross my mind that he would have to cover it for my wedding. He was my brides-man while his wife was best woman for my husband. Even if I had thought about it, he would have to wear gloves since it's on his hands.
I'm getting married today & I hope none of these shenanigans will happen during my wedding! 😅😂 Love your reactions a lot Lottie! ❤❤❤❤
Congratulations!🎉 The very best to you and yours! Cheers!🥂🍾🥂
Congratulations! 🎉🥳🎉
@@SonjaElizabethTealThank you so much! ❤❤❤
@@nats9524Thank you! ❤❤❤
I hope you had a fantastic day with no drama and lots of fun and happiness.
Thanks!
That she didn't accept the solution of the sister between to solve her aesthetic problem shows it was really about excluding the husband.
It kinda feels like the stepsister and her now fiance rushed to get engaged after OP. Because I can’t imagine wanting to hijack a family holiday for a proposal, and then complain that another family member is present wearing an engagement ring they know she’s had for months. If they feel upstaged, they really should seek help as a couple since they decided to overwrite a successful, happy proposal by being jealous of someone else’s possessions.
My word, if these people are going to be like this at their wedding how is life being married to them going to go? Life is hard, married spouses should help one another.
I really love how there is always a Michael Scott popup or insert any time there is a good "that's what she said" moment in all of Charlotte's videos. Props to the editor on the consistency. 😆
That's the wisest thing I ever heard you say Charlotte, "stop comparing yourself and circumstances to everybody else, be happy for other people and their circumstances. You're smart as well as funny.
Stress can also make psoriasis worse and if she was stressing over the concealers that could also have been part of the problem. I have a family member with psoriasis and psoriatic arthritis and it genuinely stinks - I think the boyfriend took home the gold medal on this one though. He is the hero
I don't care if your engagement ring is the Hope diamond 💍, you wear it and wear it proudly! Prepare yourself for a lot of petty future comparisons. Your stepsister and fiancee has set the stage.
Neither of my ex-husbands gave me an engagement ring. My 2nd ex didn't give me a wedding ring, told me I had "enough jewelry already". He also told me not to get one for him because he would never wear it (red flag!).
I did get a wedding ring from my first ex, in a very bizarre way that should have also been a huge red flag! He handed me a mason jar that had about a dozen wedding or engagement rings and told me to find one I like. I asked him where they came from, he told me he bought them at antique auctions. Since he did go to a lot of auctions I chose to believe him. I picked a ring that fit, but never wore it because it felt wrong, like bad mojo, cursed kind of wrong.
After we divorced, I got a print out of his 9 page rap sheet. He was a "career" burglar who also liked to commit credit card fraud for fun and profit. The reason he went to so many auctions is because that's how he fenced items he stole!
Story 1: if someone disrespects your spouse, you always have your spouse's back...always. Your sister is TA.
I recently got engaged and I now watch these videos as research of what not to do in addition to entertainment. 😂
Congratulations 🫂 ❤
@@BrianAndresScottThank you!!
CONGRATULATIONS! You’ll be fine as long as you remember it’s about celebrating your marriage with people you care about and who care about you!
1st story: It’s definitely a homophobia thing. Ran into that a couple times when hubby and I started dating. Kudos to OP for remaining composed. I would have burned that bridge in the worst way right then and there if it were me.
As the mother of a gay son who I love more than life itself, agree
That last one - by that logic, no one should wear their wedding rings to a wedding 😂
The Engagement Ring story: It was a fancy party for a holiday. Dude and the fiance were just upset due to insecurity over the ring size... And focusing on size over context is how people show their entitlement. :'D