How to meet the girl of your dreams
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- Опубліковано 22 лют 2024
- The perfect wingman
The Jeaney Collective:
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(Thank you to @pwnarthefirst, for bringing this to my attention)
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Audio:
Epidemic Sound - La Donna E Mobile (Version 2) - Traditional
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Hi, Al. This video is a dub of a meme about how to meet the girl of your dreams, using a falconer's glove (fool proof) Please show it to people who will like it. Thank you. - Комедії
The perfect wingman
help me Mr. Jeaney Collects, I’ve got no RIZZ!
yes.
yes’nt
Brutal Orchestra
@@depressionexpression you may not have rizz... but a falcon does
The girl didn't matter, that free falcon is all I need in life
me when no girl
@@em4six348 You can say you have a girl when you get a female falcon.
I was gonna like, but the like count would’ve been 199, and I don’t play that “almost” shit.
True
This man gets it.
"Hey i got you another falcon for our anniversary! I know it isnt going to be the same, but i thought you'd like him!"
"Shit."
Free Falcon!
"A relationship built on a foundation of lies can only end in ruins."
- Me, just now
There's an easy fail-proof solution to this. Before initiating the plan, also get a falcon along with the glove and train it. Then tell it to go hang out somewhere before you approach the girl.
Bonus: You now have a girl AND a falcon.
@@Zulk_RS no i dont need to do the plan anymore
tf you mean shit? i have a falcon now!
Instructions unclear, I am now married to a falcon.
Best outcome
@@jojofagnojento9421 jezz
I guess i cant stop u guys from doing the falcon
lucky fuck
oh no, the instructions were very clear, congratulations my man
We call that a "win-win".
I ain't no woman but I would love to help someone look for their falcon. That sounds freaking awesome. Such a cool and rare pet
I hope you're ready for marriage.
@@poppers7317 Depends. Are you offering?
Exactly, now you're already trapped in their scheme. It's impossible to get out now.
@@sorensouthard927 OH NO!! THEIR PLAN IS UNFOLDING UPON ME.
Wow cool falcon
"Marry me" huh? What? Okay whatever just let me look at that falcon. Mesmerizing
"Good job, Xerces I'll give you a treat later"
"CAW"
instructions unclear mistook the glove for a dueling one and slapped the girl i like. our duel is tomorrow
Awesome first date for you, have fun with her
I wish you luck in defending the honor of your lost falcon.
That ain't a girl, THATS A WOMAN! I'll gladly be your second.
... In bed?
Well, guess that'll be the first, and last date the two of you will be having
Instructions unclear, girl is now perched on my falconer's glove.
Sounds like it went exactly as planned.
Oh my.
congratulations, you have wrist control
Me: *gets Falconer's glove and puts it on*
Me: *a female falcon lands on said glove*
Me: Finally! The girl of my dreams!
I actually thought this was going to happen.
A falcon is fine too.....
Don't you even dare.
Desperate much
Do NOT hold birb gently like hamburger. In fact, never go near an aviary.
Its all fun and games till you realise the girl can talk to falcons and they tell her you are lying
Wait what
But what if the falcon decides to wingman?
A common situation.
@@zacharyrollick6169 Falcon's are no man. But they do have wings. 🤔
There's very little chance that we have a Dolittle situation, so I'm sure we'll be fine
What if the Falcon started attacking me?
Asking for a friend
Thank you for your suggestion guys, it will definitely help me- i mean my friend to meet the girl of his dreams.
just calmly whisper to the falcon that you're trying something cool you saw on the internet and you really need his help
no falcon would refuse, certainly none i've ever known
Befriend the falcon
@@NB-gu9rs Falcons are well known for being very supportive of guys trying things they saw on the Internet.
@NB-gugrs boom! Got yourself literal wing man right there
yeah i tried but like the falcon said "yeah alright bro" and the girl ran away cause falcons apparently don't talk?? @@NB-gu9rs
I liked how the phrase "ensure a second date" implies that the false falconry scheme was the "first date".
Are you trying to imply that searching for a lost falcon ISN'T a romantic first date???
@@SchemingGoldberg No, they are merely commenting on how the original post implies it IS, and that they liked that.
Honestly the better option is to just take up falconry. You can't be caught lying if it's the truth, and going around with a falcon on your hands is sure to spark conversation. After all, a bird in the hand...
A bird in the hand leads to a girl in the bush?
@@IDrankALavaLamp Huge.
Means you get into two bushes?
@@IDrankALavaLamp a bird on the hand leads to a hand in the bush
Can be killed with two stones in the legs?
Forgot the important detail of needing the surface-level knowledge & materials at home to give the impression that you did in fact own a falcon prior to this attempt at using a lost falcon as a conversation starter
(Also, maintaining an interesting conversation is probably the part most of us are worried about more than the intiation)
Nah man, no need to prepare. Just wing it!
Use the falcon knowledge as a conversation starter, then wing it from there 👍
Some might be mildly concerned about the lying.
Also, pray the girl you're attempting to pickup, isn't themselves into falconry...
If they are, simply _come clean!_ However, maybe still fib... by saying that you had seen her in passing a previous day and, whilst having no idea what she was into, felt this was a good ice breaker to try and talk to her, but that she being a falconer was an unfortunate coincidence.
It could still work out and then your relationship would be built upon a lie, or at least, a significantly smaller one! 😅
@@DUKE_of_RAMBLE or that the average body temperature of an adult peregrine falcon is 40°C?
This is one of those ideas that you know damn well wont work but really feels like it could
This is actually legit. Of course, the 0th implicit step is to sleep first.
@@ultimaxkom8728 Kinda obvious really. Can't meet the girl of your _dreams_ while awake.
Basically all of my plots to usurp my current crush, i know they won't work but I they seem like great ideas to try just incase.
@@wordcoffee101"usurp" bro is planning to take over the throne 💀
@@lucascampelo1973 dude is staging a coup d'crush
"guarantee a second date" my guy, you never even went on a FIRST date
The search of the falcon was counted as a date
how in the hell is a boy/girl falcon hunt NOT a date?!
It's a date only you know about.
I had tons of these.
@@NB-gu9rsBC the girl wasn't even aware it was a date, she was just helping you find your lost falcon
@@dylanrodriguessounds like a date to me
Tip: For 100% success, raise a Falcon and train it to be able to fly around on its own, and to come back when called by its name, like this, you can call it back near the end of your search, now you've got not only a partner, but a best friend as well.
platinum rizz
why weren't you calling for it during the rest of the search? I mean, screw the girl get the falcon back man.
@@tellmewhenitsoveruse a fake name my guy
The falcon could find the girl for you and circle overhead
@@tellmewhenitsover Good order of events, the falcons is the best wingman lol
How to meet the girl of your dreams?
Sleep
Lol
instructions were unclear, got falcon's name wrong, caused great offense to both falcon and potential girlfriend, falcon and girl now dating
please advise
You need to get an eagle involved. Eagles are incredibly jealous of others relationships
@@PippyPopsSelfHarmMonicathats like buying a weasel to catch a rat, then buying a cat to catch the weasel
@@axolotlinabucket1287then buying a dog do catch the cat to catch the weasel to catch the rat
what you need is a Whistling Kite. A bit fiery, but it gets the job done.
As a woman, let me tell you, the glove is enough to make me fall head over heels. A man who's into falconry? Sign me up!
You could even say you still don't have a falcon, that you're planing to get one, you just bought the glove to be equipped for when you eventually get one. I would help you choose and name it.
where were you when I needed you six years ago, now I am off the market
I'm not even straight and I'd probably be interested enough in that man that I'd curse my gayness!
@@MrAntfreakAny chance for restocking?
*We need to protect this woman!!*
_Not only_ is she willing to confirm the gameplan as being plausible, *_but she's willing to offer ways to increase its success!!_*
Kudos, m'lady! _🎩👌_
☺️
@@DUKE_of_RAMBLE I sincerely hope that last part was satire.
actually the dreams of my girl
Jeaney collects is the girl of my dreams
She is not a girl, she is a falcon 😢
@@TPkarovJeaney is AFBYCS (assigned falcon by UA-cam comment section)??
Not since the accident...
@@Omnitruncater2000huh?
Tried this, and I now have forty-five falcons. The food expenses alone...
Thanks for the tip, Jeaney. Now next time a strapping young lad approaches me looking for his falcon, I can absolve myself of responsibility by simply stating "Sorry, but I'm a lesbian" and leaving
But what if the guy really had a falcon problem
why do you hate falcons?
@@blaziard683 he should get a straight girl to find it
@@Ponera-Sama why do you hate falcons
@@WohaoG Because they fly straight, obviously.
Worst case scenario: the falcon is the woman's
Worst worst case scenario: The woman is the falcon
@@RaptrRamblings She lost a bet with a wizard?
Worst case scenario: you become a falcon
Absolute worst scenario: A Fighting Falcon crashes into you.
@@samtherandom6404 BEST CASE SCENARIO!!!
You become a falcon, and the gal-con of your dreams likes you back!!!!
I tried this and now I'm happily living with my new falcon.
The fact that they counted the falcon search as a first date is both cute and sad at the same time
Nonsense, how could a joint falcon search be anything besides a first date?
Kinda awkward when a falconer loses a falcon and they're with a friend, because then they have to decide whether the friend should sit it out, thus reducing the chances of finding the falcon, or if they're just gonna have their first date... even if they're not attracted to each other.
There's gonna be a lot of sad, lonely dudes with falconer's gloves out there, thanks to this post.
Was it written by someone trying to sell falconer's gloves do you think?
they won’t be sad or lonely when they get their falcon
Instructions unclear, I took the falcon to dinner.
*takes free falcon and girl of dreams home*
person with falconers glove who genuinely lost their falcon "nooo my falcon!! where are you!! of only there was some beautiful woman around here who could help me look for him! but alas there are non. I fear I may never see my beloved falcon again :( "
if your falcon would abandon you that easily for someone they never saw before, you never actually had the falcon and don't deserve a beautiful woman
The two comments that matter.
@@San-lh8us what if you, and the person who originally owned the falcon, looked suspiciously similar or, even more likely, you had purchased your falconers glove from this person so it was a familiar glove for the falcon?
@@crisrose9707aren't falcons known to have one of the most precise and accurate visions in the animal kingdom? if so, and that still happens, that means the universe itself just wants to troll you, and at that point, just take the L and try to find another falcon
@@San-lh8us oh, I already have a falcon thanks, and a beautiful woman. this falcon that I just found is great!
When she pulls out her own glove and says "yes, my eagle is around here somewhere".
I was suspicious at first but it makes so much sense... it is really foolproof
How to meet the falcon of your dreams (foolproof)
HOW TO MEET THE FALCON OF YOUR DREAMS (FOOLPROOF)
Buy a girl's glove.
Approach the falcon you like wearing the girl's glove.
Ask him “Excuse me, have you seen a girl fly by here?”
Look up to the sky, hopeful/sad.
If he says “No,” look distraught and ask him if he wouldn’t mind helping you look for your girl.
No falcon would ever turn down an opportunity like this.
Use the time you spend together searching for the girl to get to know him.
At the end of your search (10 minutes) you will probably need consoling re: the loss of your one true friend.
By this point his interest in you based on the fact that you were able to put so much love and time into the raising of a girl will more than ensure a second date, and from there it’s just a hop skip and a jump to marriage.
Good luck!
*NOTE: If by chance a girl does appear out of nowhere, simply say ” (girl’s name) I’ve missed you so much! Don’t ever scare me like that again!” Then offer to take the falcon to dinner for helping you find your lost girl. Bonus: You just got a free girl!
HOW TO MEET THE FALCON OF YOUR DREAMS (FOOLPROOF)
Buy a girl's glove.
Approach the falcon you like wearing the girl's glove.
Ask him “Excuse me, have you seen a girl fly by here?”
Look up to the sky, hopeful/sad.
If he says “No,” look distraught and ask him if he wouldn’t mind helping you look for your girl.
No falcon would ever turn down an opportunity like this.
Use the time you spend together searching for the girl to get to know him.
At the end of your search (10 minutes) you will probably need consoling re: the loss of your one true friend.
By this point his interest in you based on the fact that you were able to put so much love and time into the raising of a girl will more than ensure a second date, and from there it’s just a hop skip and a jump to marriage.
Good luck!
*NOTE: If by chance a girl does appear out of nowhere, simply say ” (girl’s name) I’ve missed you so much! Don’t ever scare me like that again!” Then offer to take the falcon to dinner for helping you find your lost girl. Bonus: You just got a free girl!
This is quite literally a side quests
“Captain falcon! im so glad to find you, dont ever scare me like that- hey where you going?”
*the girl and the falcon left*
Combo move. Get a more chiller brid: raven, canary, or parrot soon after the first date and start training that saying you wanted a more chill bird that's less likely to fly away.
if i met someone looking for their falcon and the next day they show up with a RAVEN i am absolutely marrying them on the spot
Ravens my beloved
If someone approached me looking for a falcon I'd date them
Can confirm, got the falconers glove and the girl of my dreams flew down and perched right on it!
I'm going to be honest, I'm going to follow this guide, step by step, just because I want a free falcon, nothing more.
Update us regularly i beg
Lemme know how that turns out
please, we need information. How is the falcon hunt going?
But wouldn't that create an infinite loop of someone losing their falcon and someone else finding the falcon and a date then promptly losing the falcon again?
An infinite loop of men finding the girl of their dreams?
Yes.
Problem?
Other than a probably distraught falcon, that is.
WE MANIPULATING OUR WAY INTO MARRIAGE WITH THIS ONE 🗣️🗣️🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥‼️‼️‼️‼️
what if a hawk lands on your glove instead?
instructions unclear, had roast hawk for dinner.
I was honestly expecting it to just be
"Step one: fall asleep
Step two: if there's a girl in your dream, then go talk to her
Congrats you have just met the girl of your dream"
But... what if she rejects me?
i'm gonna try this but with owls, because falcons don't usually appear where i live
You fools are here for the girl while I am here for the falcon, we are not the same
I would be afraid of the other Falconer training like, a whole mew full of Falcons to attack me for stealing his Falcon to pick up women.
instructions unclear. police arrested me for f*cking a glove in public
😭 these make my day
mine to
On finding a falcon exclaim "that isn't my falcon, that isn't Greg" and look extra sad
Loss of falcon taken as a warning sign of inability to protect those you love. No second date.
Instructions unclear, now have 137 falcons.
I once saw a falcon on my walk to school.
I was almost late because of how long I was looking at it.
i prefer the “u just got a free falcon” part ❤❤
Proceed to teatch the falcon to steal money and bring them back to you....STONKS
Instructions unclear, the falcon has me now
The glove and the strategy don't matter, the only thing that matters is your courage to talk to them in the first place and hopefully you have the minimum social skills to talk to a person.
I mean it's a good conversation starter. Works with most exotic pets, actually, if you ask for helping looking for anything other than a dog or cat most people will be caught off guard enough to actually take the time to help you if they have it.
As a girl, I can confirm, this will (probably) work.
sound full proof to me
It's a soundful proof to me too.
@@imveryangryitsnotbutterproof sound is full, please advise.
Did you soundproof it fully? No? You fool
instructions unclear, i'm now married to a falcon
How to meet the girl of your dreams: Go tf to sleep
instructions unclear, i was punched into the stratosphere by one captain falcon.
As a single lady, of relatively noble birth, and of an age whereupon the social pressure to marriage has become my all-consuming raison d'etre; and who, during a particularly daydreamy stroll through the thistle-laden moors of my family estate, seem to have wandered through a chasm in the spacetime continuum and landed, rather unceremoniously into the year 2024, I can, with great certainty, claim no immunity to the charms of a would-be falconer.
Why did it feel like I was reading the beginning of a Terms of Service agreement? 💀
How to meet the girl of your dreams!
Step 1: Go back to sleep.
Alternative: get a falcon
Who needs true love when you have a falcon
You get a true love from a falcon 😂
While this will work, I do feel it's unethical to base this relationship on trickery.
Well you could just become a falconer and lose the falcon beforehand
You are completely right. You should form your bond with the falcon from birth.
How to meet the girl of your dreams:
Go to sleep.
The man in the moon tried that trick once, but an Eagle landed on top of him instead.
If I lost my falcon it would be so much more than 10 minutes spent searching for my raptor buddy.
"The loss of your one true friend"
Looks around only for 10 minutes.
Checks out
There are no flaws in this plan
You can't go wrong when taking advice from 4chan
if she thinks she’s too good to help a falconer in times of distress, she’s not the one anyway.
I really appreciate that they included a contingency for falcons appearing out of nowhere and ruining my chance to pretend to look for him with the girl of my dreams. This has proved quite an issue for my relationships so it's really empowering that I now know what to do!
It's really an all around win win situation, even if she refuses the dinner for helping you find the falcon, you still got out with a falcon
This is the single greatest advertisement for falconer’s gloves I’ve seen.
Whole post is just a scheme set up by Big Falcon™ to sell more falconer's gloves
This is the white van approach to talking to women.
I’m just imagining the “I’d rather have a boat than a wife” rowing song but a falcon instead of a boat 😂
Instructions unclear, I now have 17 falcons, no girls, and a custody battle for the 18th falcon
Angry about how well this ruse would work on me irl
If the girl has a falcon too, you have a *perfect* match.
I'm saving this for the future
Now I’m just gonna walk around with a falconers glove for the 1% passive falcon drop rate
I had a bald eagle land on my glove, so she called me an idiot and stormed off.
You know... I really expected this to be going somewhere else entirely....
Instructions unclear, the falconer's glove is asking me for my number
instructions unclear, while looking for the lost falcon i was lured to a dungeon
Indeed, I wouldn’t turn down looking for someone’s falcon lmao
I'm here to steal the falcon from a random stranger with my glove
plot twist shes also a falconeer and sees your incompetance
Every girl will help you find your falcon.
I feel like there could be some truth to this, because I know for an absolute fact that it would work on me
"Well it all started with my pet albatross..." James Rolfe
And then the falcon coming to you will mean the previous ower will have to look for their falcon, perpetuating the cycle. Genius.
Ok but how do I recognize a girl that appreciates a man’s dedication to his falcon
You have to dream the girl you love.
Me : throwing the gloves
I challenge you to duel
Instructions unclear. Accidentally falcon punched a pigeon.
Reality:
- "Would you help me find my falcon?"
- "Eh.... Sorry, I gotta be... somewhere. I have a thing to do and yeah but good luck finding your falcon, bye!"
Instructions unclear, writing this a perch a gloved falcon while girl is searching for me
Going for a walk and waiting for her
Thanks for the advice, i will use it (i hope)