i’m already a caregiver at home. Its mentally draining when I have an 81 year old mother with issues & she lives alone. she has a beautiful condo nearby, but she’s miserable. especially since we moved them out of their home of 40 years that wasn’t working for them anymore. too many stairs in & out of house. My dad could never go outside. then he passed away. Whole family knows she is very negative since my dad passed away, and she wants to put everything on you. She wants somebody to hold her hand every day. She absolutely hates being home during the day. She doesn’t have enough people to keep her busy. so many of our family members are not here anymore. She sees her friends, but not every day. I still have grown children at home and my husband works long hours. My siblings are not nearby. I suggested the senior citizens and the church yet she doesn’t follow through. I suggested therapy in a support group. However, she’s been running not to be home even when my dad lived home. She constantly tells me she hates to live alone, but she would drive you crazy. The negativity is energy draining. I don’t know what to do for her. She doesn’t Want to change or help herself either. I feel so guilty not to be able to do more, but it’s really affecting my health as well. and affordability for assisted-living is awful.
You seem like a lovely person but this advice is an inadequate bandaid for the elder care crisis we’re facing, and frankly quite silly. A beeping pill monitor? Really? I’m clearly not your intended audience. Maybe someone will find this useful . I’m looking for real solutions to get us out of this mess. Nothing personal but I will look elsewhere.
@geraldinegranger9186 Hi Geraldine, I appreciate your comment and understand your point of view. You're right. The elder care crisis will need a systemic change on an enormous level. Unfortunately, that's much larger than I can impact. I intentionally focus where I can make a difference: on small changes for many people that might lessen their stress about caring for aging parents just a little. With that, I can make a difference, and I'm proud of being able to do that. I hope you find the solutions that you're looking for!
i’m already a caregiver at home. Its mentally draining when I have an 81 year old mother with issues & she lives alone. she has a beautiful condo nearby, but she’s miserable. especially since we moved them out of their home of 40 years that wasn’t working for them anymore. too many stairs in & out of house. My dad could never go outside. then he passed away.
Whole family knows she is very negative since my dad passed away, and she wants to put everything on you. She wants somebody to hold her hand every day. She absolutely hates being home during the day. She doesn’t have enough people to keep her busy. so many of our family members are not here anymore. She sees her friends, but not every day. I still have grown children at home and my husband works long hours. My siblings are not nearby.
I suggested the senior citizens and the church yet she doesn’t follow through. I suggested therapy in a support group.
However, she’s been running not to be home even when my dad lived home.
She constantly tells me she hates to live alone, but she would drive you crazy. The negativity is energy draining.
I don’t know what to do for her. She doesn’t Want to change or help herself either.
I feel so guilty not to be able to do more, but it’s really affecting my health as well. and affordability for assisted-living is awful.
What if one of your parents is not the veteran but needs assistance. What program can the spouse go through so they can get home health care?
You can still apply for survivors benefits with the VA.
Thank you Sofia! I’ve never heard of the Papa Pal program before. Will be looking into that.
You seem like a lovely person but this advice is an inadequate bandaid for the elder care crisis we’re facing, and frankly quite silly. A beeping pill monitor? Really? I’m clearly not your intended audience. Maybe someone will find this useful . I’m looking for real solutions to get us out of this mess. Nothing personal but I will look elsewhere.
@geraldinegranger9186 Hi Geraldine, I appreciate your comment and understand your point of view. You're right. The elder care crisis will need a systemic change on an enormous level. Unfortunately, that's much larger than I can impact. I intentionally focus where I can make a difference: on small changes for many people that might lessen their stress about caring for aging parents just a little. With that, I can make a difference, and I'm proud of being able to do that. I hope you find the solutions that you're looking for!