When I was 11 years old I went through a year of depression. I hid a tangled mess of hair under a low pony tail. One day a friend came and visited and wanted to do my hair. I was ashamed and eventually showed her my hair. She didn't bat an eye and lovingly spent the rest of the day gently untangling my hair. I never once even felt a tug of pain. It was such a confidence booster. God's grace came in this loving act of service. Never again did I let that happen.
I really like that you don't show people's face. It allows them to share their story, show a lot of empathy but don't exploit them. Your videos are very inspiring.
Yes, in an ideal world there would be no stigma or shame associated with mental health struggles but since there are still people who judge it's great that she does her videos in a way that lets people share their stories while protecting their identities.
when i had knotted hair like this and went to the hair salon they SHAMED me and other customers LAUGHED at me along with whispering to each other. I love how you create such a safe environment for them :(
@Krystal Rodriguez I’m so sorry you experienced that.. They don’t know what you went through or dealt with that made you end up with your hair like that. The lack of empathy and compassion from people nowadays is sickening.. I hope you’re in a better place now. ❤️
Same. It felt so upsetting and they couldn't even unmatt it. I was so embarrassed and I felt like crying, they kept asking me how it happened and I just said that I didn't brush it. My auntie was so much more nice and she actually got it out, she's so nice.
What I'm hearing is that not only has she beaten her addiction(with her son!) and reached out for help with her hair, but she's also FORGIVEN HERSELF. I'm so proud and happy for her.
When I was in middle school I had my hair matted just like this so I went to supercuts and the manager judged me and told them to shave all of my hair off and made jokes about my hair with the other workers but a sweet amazing woman just like you told them she would spend however long to make sure I had my beautiful curls back and she did! 2 hours later and I didn't have to shave off my hair I am forever grateful for that woman and so glad there's people out there just like her❤
@@laurayeates2478 I think you didn't read the comment till the end. It was the woman who helped. She wasn't the bad person here. The bad people were the saloon manager & workers.
This is beautiful. I didn’t have the best home life as a child and matted rats nests in my hair were common. When I was 11 a girl my age talked to me and brought in hair care items and tools. She spent class all year taking care of my shame. Our teacher would thank her each week. You shine bright!
I'm a stylist who detangles matts like this, and I've gathered from my clients that I'm the only one in my area that didn't turn them away and that's crazy to me because our job as stylists is to help people feel the best about themselves as possible not matter what, so to hear them say they wouldn't help or even in these comments that they were shamed is awful
That's the difference between doing your job just for the money and doing it as a vocation and a passion. You have a heart of gold, thank you for helping those people❤✨
Maybe they felt unqualified for that kind of job though. Bless you for helping people, but I can completely understand why stylists would turn this away. If you have no idea how to handle it best and are worried you’ll make it worse/painful then I can’t blame them at all.
Thanks for your share. I was reading the comments because I'm trying to untangle my ladies bird's nest she is so uncomfortable all the time because of her hair that she'll spend each God givin day more miserable than the last . Please help me on what to do. It's mated and seems to be falling out a lot. She always has had beautiful thick long curly hair and now it's thinned out 30% and falling out in chunks. What do i do
@@vincentandreaccio3604 From doing my dog's tail, I learned it's not easy and very painstaking. I would take the hair and sometimes have to pull the strands that were not very tangles out one strand at a time. Other times, I would have to work from the ends and move by centimeters up the knot and detangling as I went. There were times that the tangle was so bad the I cut it a small bit to have a fresh edge. This fresh edge was just enough for me to be able to get the rest of the knot out. I know it may seem like a dog and your client may not be a good match, but my dog was a Maltese with extremely fine, static-y hair and I didn't want her to live with a shaved tail just because it tangle practically just by looking at it. For my own hair, I have to use a separate conditioner when I wash it (no 2 in 1 to try and skip a step) that I leave on while I bathe myself, rinse it with warm water, pat dry with a torn, then apply a detangler, and start the comb out with a wide tooth comb starting at the ends as I work my way up the shaft. I then use a brush and finish with a fine tooth comb.
When I was depressed as a teen and didn't brush my hair, my mother and her husband responded by cutting huge chunks out of my hair saying I didn't deserve hair if I wouldn't look after it. Seeing people like this being cared for and being helped slowly helps heal me of my trauma. Keep going everyone, it will get easier
That's an inexcusable way to treat a child. You deserved nice hair, you deserved to have your body respected, and you certainly deserved compassion after everything you'd been through previously
Everybody is different and being kind is what this platform is about. Please don’t call someone a liar based on your own bias. It’s rare for people to lie about their traumas. How did she gain attention? She expressed herself as you had the right to express yourself and she didn’t seek to hurt anyone or control what they say as you have. Please be kind, respectful and open - minded. Have a blessed day. @@JustYourAverageCommenter
Depression is a crippling disease. When my father died I couldn’t even get out of bed let alone brush my hair. It would just go into a bun.. luckily I got help before it got beyond my control. But I absolutely understand.. and you’re an angel for being so caring and empathetic! You’re a QUEEN!
@@dreamcatcherismylifesuppor2348 I completely understand sweetheart. It’s not an easy thing to go through but your father raised you to be strong and I promise that no matter what, you’ll get through it. My father has been gone 18 years this coming October. It gets easier with time but you’ll always have that longing for him. I always feared that I’d forget what he sounded like so take videos and all the keepsakes you can. And I’m always here if you ever need to talk!
Do you mind sharing what kind of help you got? I’m really struggling and have been in a rut for a while I don’t even know where to start to get out of it ):
@@Puuuurrrr I went to therapy for about 6 months. It taught me how to grieve and how to deal with the depression and anxiety. I also would go on drives alone and listen to a lot of music.
I have been struggling with pretty severe depression as well as other mental health issues for about 4 years. For about 2-3 years I was basically bed ridden. I also wasn't brushing my hair and it kept getting matted in the place I would lie down, but i was so lucky to have my mother who would sit me down for around 30mins to 1hr 30mins everytime my hair got really bad. I would be in a lot of pain but I loved getting my hair back. Now I'm going out, I have a job and I'm back in education, and I adore my hair. I lost about 4 years of my life to horrific depression and it genuinely makes me tear up to think of all the things I missed, I still struggle everyday but I always go out, and go to work and take care of myself, which is something I'm insanely proud of, hence why I'm sharing this! Edit: genuinely thank you so much for all the kind messages, ill continue to respond in the comments but i just wanted to say the support from everyone has made me so happy, im crying tears of joy right now. Im proud of everyone and I'm happy for anyone to share their stories (its quite cathartic) ill try my best to reply.
you still have time don’t worry you’re going to have lots of opportunities to do the things you always wanted to do, especially now that you made all of this progress !! don’t be too hard on yourself and even though i’m a complete stranger i’m proud of you
I'm going through this as we speak. I'm fighting to stay alive. I really want to end my life. Depression sucks.. I've been wearing wigs my entire life I never have the strength to do my hair.. let alone enjoy my life.
@@PJ-bc1yw I do believe in you! (I'm so sorry if I come off as patronising I am not trying to be) I cant speak for the exact situation you are going threw, but what got me to take a step in the right direction of mental health was that I got bored of staying in and watching UA-cam, it sucked at the time but was good in the long run because it meant I wanted to get out. I don't know how your depression effects you but if you are living on UA-cam like I was I beg you to keep on going because eventually something will switch and you might start wanting to go out again. I also don't know if you are on meds or getting help but if you aren't I beg you to tell your doctor and someone close to you, once I got bored of UA-cam I got extra help which really pulled me out of the gutter, I'm also on medication which is important because it allows my brain to think normally instead of overwhelmingly negatively, so if you aren't on meds I recommend talking to your doctor about it and going from there (I'm not saying you will try to overdose but if you are suicidal it might make it easier for someone close to you to give out your medication) I am proud of you! you keep fighting I really do believe in you. if you are struggling or need advice i'll be here lurking in the comments (for all my improvement I still spend most of my time inside) so i'll be here if you need a stranger to talk to, just make sure you talk to a doctor too :)
@@PJ-bc1yw , your comment make me sad. You are precious, i’m sure there is a lot of people around you that love and need you! You are stronger than you think : it need so much courage just to wright that comment and to admit what you are going thru. (i hope you understand . My english is not very good !) I send you love, light and blessings from Switzerland ✨💕
People don't understand that mental illness and addiction can manifest in different ways. I'm glad that there are stylists like you out there who help.
I went through something VERY similar except i ended up in jail with this same problem. I tried my very best to keep it concealed by wearing my hair in a bun bc i was too embarrassed to let anyone see it or ask for help. But being confined in such a small space my cell mate ended up seeing it and insisted on helping me fix it. She realized how embarrassing it was for me and that I didnt want anyone to know so we locked ourselves in for an entire day and put paper on the window so noone could see what we were doing. Until today I never told a soul about it and had no intention of ever telling anyone. It's surprising to hear theres so many similar stories out there. It's a great reminder to ppl that you are not alone and to not let fear make you be afraid to ask for help. We all have our struggles in life(some more than others) and there shouldn't be any shame in it.
That was so sweet of her ❤ I just got my hair detangled tonight after having a huge depression mat in it for the past month, you’re definitely not alone!
I'm a recovering addict as well-just got an apartment after three years of homelessness. I'm physically and mentally disabled. It's true, like the client said in the beginning- you do not get encouragement often for doing what society says you should do....but for some of us, doing what we are told we should is so difficult it's nearly impossible. As the stylist says, you never know what someone is going through- you also don't know how hard those things are for some people. Be kind.
I'm so happy for you for getting an appartment after struggling with addiction! That must have taken so much hard work and effort. You deserve to be proud of that.
I love that it doesn’t matter what the problem is or who has the problem or their skin color, you help all women get that confidence back and that they feel liberated! This is how we all should be!
@@rexai180 you’re right, but it isn’t always. I love all women and men. Black, white, gay, bi, transgender ANYTHING but not all people feel like way. This lady is a saint.
Social media anonymity allowed most people to feel comfortable in the absolute worst about themselves. And then people started speaking uo about how that effects them. Now they're seen as the attackers and that "political correctness" is taking over. When really, most people just want to he allowed to live without judgements. But too many people take social media and run with it. Every one is judge jury and executioner too, now it doesn't matter what "side" you're on. Everyone and everyone can be a target to hate, and people who thought they were on the good side are often just as cruel. Add in mob mentality, the world in flames and corporate greed and exploitation slowly stripping us of our humanity. People are definitely more miserable and hostile and trying to eek out whatever little ego boost they can.
Theres such a loving emotion with someone fixing your hair. My first grade teacher who was like a scarier version of Professor McGonagall, saw the matted mess that I had compulsively created by rubbing my bangs in circles. She came over and politely asked me what I was doing to my hair and subsequently began gently untangling it. It changed her in my mind forever especially in a time when I needed it badly. Small kindnesses can make big differences.
@@Emper0rH0rde the grooming of another is a nigh primordial tradition in displaying affection, most animals that can display higher forms of affection have some form of it. what you feel when someone grooms your hair is the same feeling that your primate ancestors felt all those millions of years ago, a love more timeless than the birds, the trees, or the rivers which flow idly by.
I have extremely thick red hair and when I was about 10 I got a rat's nest in the back (not as big as this one, but it was still quite large). Everyone at school, including my teachers, teased me about it until my mom decided to comb it out. The entire time she was berating and beittling me about it. I was a kid! I didn't know how to take care of my hair. it was a tramatic experience and caused me to hate my hair or anything related to it. I wish there were more empathetic people like you.
Your mother sounds just like mine used to be ….she blamed me for her failures …it is a parents duty to look after the child and she failed you by not helping you keep your hair in good condition …..I’ll take a bet and say she was regularly going to the salon for Haircare and beauty needs while you suffered with that rats nest ?
@@beckyluvstoscrapnsew Yes, you are correct. She would also buy the best haircare products for herself and made my siblings and I use the cheap ones. That extends to other things as well, like menstrual products. The pads she bought for us were horrible and leak (and we were forbidden to use tampons, because only hussies use those), while she used high quality ones. She also had them counted,,so if you tried to steal one of hers she'd know.
I wish I had known of you when I was going through the darkest time of my life. I spent six years of my life locked in my room. I didn’t go outside. Not even out to the kitchen unless I was certain no one was home. I was so depressed I didn’t take care of myself, physically, mentally, or hygienically. I didn’t have the energy to shower, to even COMB my hair. It got so bad that my entire head turned into a rats nest and I felt so helpless I assumed the only option was to shave it off. I did everything to try and untangle it. Every diy at home treatment I could find I was determined to get that rats nest untangled. Nothing worked. But I desperately wanted to keep my hair, I didn’t want to lose it all. So I spent a week and a half combing through my hair with a rat tail comb until it was untangled enough I could use a normal brush to do the rest. I haven’t allowed myself to go that far again and I finally pulled myself out from that deep depression and got a job and began spending as little time at home as I could. I’m grateful to myself for not giving up but I just wish I’d have had someone like you there to make me feel human when I felt my lowest.
I’m there right now. I have spent 7 years in my room and don’t take care of myself either. I don’t see an end in sight. In fact, if I died tomorrow that would be okay.
@@alittlewheiser521 No, please, don't say that 🥺. You can do it! You can get out of this and shine bright 💕. I know we don't know each other, but I'll be here if you ever need someone to talk to. You matter 💕.
When I first met my boyfriend's grandmother she had thigh length hair she wore in two braids. She had become less aware of what she was doing when brushing and was wrapping the hair around her brush and the middle back was actually like felt. I spent the whole weekend detangling her hair. Because I am tender headed I was very gentle and she never protested my combing like she did from others.
My cousin went through the same thing and was considering shaving her head. I spent an entire day helping her detangle as much as I could and ended up giving her a cute layered cut after we finally got it out. She was embarrassed and ashamed but I kept telling her that it's no big deal, I was happy to help her and it was so worth the effort. Really love the lack of judgement and support you show in these videos.
I wished I had a cousin like you or a sister! I was not so great and taking care of my hair- too much of the tomboy in me and well not doing anything for months it grew and grew but unfortunately wasted in Matt's >
I wish I could say I had someone in my life that helped me when I needed it. All my mom and sister kept saying was I needed to cut it. Was told I had no reason to be depressed.
When I was a teenager all of my hair wound up in a giant knot.....I wound up in a psychiatric hospital, and when I was there one of the staff members offered to help me brush it out. She said she'd done it for other patients before. I turned her down because I guess I was just still really ashamed and felt like I couldn't ask someone to do that for me, but the simple gesture of her just offering to help with no judgment at all meant so, so much to me and I'll never forget it. What you're doing is beautiful
@Kira I'm sitting here reading these comments watching this video wondering what the heck I'm going to do with my half head of severely matted hair right next to my scalp. How did you make out a month later. Did you get your matt out and if yes how did you do it? I need help desperately.
As a very young woman (I was born in the 1950s) there was a woman in my home city who had hair as matted as this right down to her waist. People called her ‘witch’ and ‘tramp’ but I could only wonder what must have happened to her to end up like that. She would come into the store I worked in and I always made sure to treat her with the utmost respect, even though she never bought anything. It turns out that her fiancé was killed in the war and she just gave up. She was also painfully thin. I will never forget her. Huge congratulations to your client on her sobriety. I’m so glad you could help her. Best wishes from the UK ❤😊
Thank you for this video. I gave birth to my stillborn daughter this year, one week before her due date. She was fullterm. A day before she passed, I was told there is a one in a million chance in anything happening and it did. So the trauma put me in a deep depression and I didn't shower for months. This video helped me get my hair back so thank you so much 🙏 I wish we had more kindness in the world like yourself 😢❤
I’m so very sorry for your loss! I am saying a prayer for you to feel the peace of God now. I lost a baby 15 years ago and it’s the worse kind of pain but God saw me to the other side. ❤️
I had hair down to my waist when I was depressed. My mother refused to let me cut it cause “girls should have long hair”. After three years of begging I got it cut. Mom said 8-10” and the lady “thankfully” heard 18”. I lost so much dead hair and it really helped me get healthy.
Good for you. My mom is the same way. Sometimes, you gotta just take charge of your own happiness. I hope you do whatever you want to with you hair in the future. Your mom doesnt own your happiness, your body, or even your hair.
@@lilysong1321 I have come to think of shoulder length as a good length. It gives an impression of "long" while also being close to short. It also usually has enough length for a low ponytail.
My boyfriend and I, just like her, simultaneously wanted to get clean after nearly a decade of active addiction. Most other addict-couples aren’t so luck, so it’s always nice to run into another couple who proves that it IS possible. It’s going to be hard, but you can do! Sober: 07/28/2019 🤘🏻🤘🏻
you want heroin you want heroin you want heroin you want heroin you want heroin you want heroin you want heroin you want heroin you want heroin you want heroin you want heroin you want heroin you want heroin
I can't tell you how many times I've sat and cried on my bathroom floor while brushing out matted hair because I hadn't taken care of myself for weeks. I was too embarrassed to ask anyone for help, so it's wonderful to see someone being kind and compassionate and understanding. Having mental health issues comes with a lot of stigma and you make these ladies feel loved with your care.
Congrats on ur recovery one day at a time I'd been Clean for 7 and a half but relapsed due to loosing my husband, my soul mate on Feb 19th.... my hair has this going on so I'm just trying to see if it is possible to brush out or if I must shave it off....
Oh wow. When I went through clinical depression, my body reacted by packing on over 50 lbs in just a few months. Eventuality, it was an extra 75 lbs, which I then lugged around for 8 years. Last fall, I decided I had carried the scars of my illness long enough, and finally was ready to get rid of it. Today, I am down 70lbs, and it feels as good as getting that ball of dead hair off must have. Congrats, girl!
A lot of people don’t realize but depression causes your cortisol hormone to spike which causes you to gain and retain weight. I have severe depression and my weight is a constant battle. I’m in a healthy range now. Congrats on the hard work!
I hope I can be like you someday! I’m depressed and I want to lose weight, but I’ve gained even more weight instead. I was overweight and wanted to return to a healthy weight, but I ended up becoming obese instead.
I wasn’t fully taught self-care, I was kind of just given a girl body book. My hair as a kid was matted and hidden under the longer hair on top for a long time until my parents remembered I had to get a haircut again. The man cutting my hair noticed what I’d been neglecting and my mom was fully convinced and telling me that I’d have to get it shaved. I was scared, but he combed through it all and I couldn’t be more grateful.
This is how I was given the sex talk. I was given a book called something like What's Happening to my Body and that was it. My sisters and I all kept our copies because we couldn't believe that's how our mom went about it. We were also never taught how to care for ourselves but shamed for not knowing how. It's extremely stressful for a child. I hope you're doing better now. Therapy helped me a lot. I had to learn to reparent myself and be there for my younger self the way she deserved at the time. I wish you the best in your journey 💕
I wasn't taught anything other than how the absolute basics, didn't help that i am a guy with long hair and people tend not to give hair advice to guys for some reason
I love that she fought to keep her hair. It shows that even those who are suffering still have strength within them, and beliefs to hold on to. When you lose control of your life, it's important to identify things that you find are worth it to you, even if it may seem superficial to others. I hope she goes home with the knowledge of how to take care of any more rat's nests that may pop up early on, as well as how to prevent them.
I remember having to gently pull out knots in my best friends hair bc she was too depressed to brush her hair at age 16, I’m so happy that there’s a service that can do this now for people that are isolated or can’t get help from their friends 💖
When I was in elementary school, I didn't take good care of my hair, and my parents didn't care enough to help me with it or teach me to take care of it. I ended up with a huge knot and my mom made me cut it all off. The hairdressers shamed me so bad, saying I was "too old to be like this." It was traumatizing. God bless you. Everyone is going through something
That's weird..when someone is trying to do better..you shame them. What aholes. Btw it's just hair. For people to be crazy over your own body, hair etc is weird too. Life is tough. Those are the least worries
I don't understand why you don't have alot more subscribers, you selflessly help people regain their self confidence and it's a beautiful thing you're doing.
You got me. I always search for her videos, but never subscribed? Why? IDK. "I'm a subscriber! I clicked the button." (In my Destiny's Child singing voice)
"To set people free". Not physically, but spiritually and mentally.." When you removed 3 pounds of her matted hair, you also set her free physically. ❤
As I've also learned about hair, hair can hold so much negative energy just based off of your mental health, anyone touching it with the potential of having negative energy, and trauma so it did do something I cut my hair from every now and then get be relieved from all the pressure I was carrying
This is the first video of yours I have seen. I was raised by addicts. The way you speak to your clients brings me to tears. Thank you so much for recognizing the beauty in your clients. The world usually sees them as monsters.
There are some monsters here in the comments that make me so ashamed of the human race. I need help with this myself. Depression is a bitch to live along side of. This has NEVER happened to me until it did. I let my hair grow long and ugly during Covid, longest it’s been since high school. I’ve worn it as a tausled pixie cut forever and was considered very attractive. I’m WAY OLDER NOW and totally alone except for my dog and I’ve cried everyday so hard that this happened to me and it’s no one’s fault but my own. My sister in law (I asked her for help), told me that’s pure laziness and said she’s “out of this”. It’s been 3 weeks since I’ve tried working on it. My entire top part of my head is matted to right at my scalp. I CAN’T CUT IT OFF, I’ll be bald. I’m so embarrassed and ashamed but can’t find help. My hair is very straight and fine. I didn’t think this could have ever happen to me, and I’ve no one who cares about me many years after a horrible divorce. I just want to feel human again! 14:27
I once got a rats nest in my hair for not brushing in literal weeks when I was a child (think around 7). It made me feel insecure so I would wear a hoodie over my head to conceal it. One night my mom did brush it out, I was crying the whole time but she kept saying "it's alright, we're gonna get through this" and I thought about that time while watching this. You're a kind woman, doing god's work, thank you so much
Aww that's my daughter's name. Hadassah. She told me I should have named her Elsa after Princess Elsa and I remind her I named her after a queen who almost single handedly saved her entire people from annihilation. She is starting to take to it now. Extremely satisfying to see the hair come undone.
Remind her that Hadassa is the Hebrew name of Esther and that Esther is another form of Elisabeth which is another form of Elsa! She shares a name with two incredible queens and she can be proud of that.
I've had this problem in recent years, as I figure a combination of not brushing it out regularly especially during the pandemic but even before when I was depressed, it would get tangled from sleeping on it. After having a friend help me comb it out once, and paying a lady in a salon twice, I finally took control back myself and started buying detangling sprays ( there's a nice Olive Oil based one at Dollar Tree, 12 oz. For $1.). And I started combing it out after each shower and braiding it when wet. I figure that I always had fine tangly hair but the texture is more prone now that I am older it's naturally drier plus coloring it leaves it drier. So the olive oil or kids detangler and the braiding has helped a lot. But when I still get a matt or tangle from time to time, I try to get on brushing it out sooner. If the olive oil kind is too oily, try the kids' detangling sprays, or try mixing them together in your own spray bottle. I do this now because the kids'stuff smells better and is less oily but I need some of that oil.
I was very depressed for about three months straight this past year. I wasn’t able to get out of bed or out the door. My Caucasian hair became so matted in the back…I was so embarrassed I could let it get like this. But I want to say - your video made me realize I’m not the only person going through something like this. Releasing the matted hair is also a way to release mental health back to a healthy state. Thank you so much for what you are doing 💜
Right? The hair is like a physical representation of all that pain and hurt being felt. When it gets released, it’s like a ton of bricks off your psyche!
When I was in my twenties the same thing happened to me. I became extremely depressed and I didn't get out of bed for about 3 months. I finally pulled myself up and decided to get a shower and I realized that my hair was so matted, I didn't think I would ever get through it.
Im watching this while working on my own matted hair after a month in bed and drinking. I absolutely love and resonated with everything that woman said. every word that came out of her mouth is the truth. people on the outside cant comprehend what we are going through, even if they think they do. and Miss Hairdresser, you are TOTALLY amazing for helping these people out, and giving emotional support with no judgement. Today I decided to fix my hair and hopefully my life eventually. thankyou both for the inspiration.
Depression and anemia often has me going months without washing my hair because I just don't have the energy. I think currently I'm on my third month or something? But these videos are so compassionate and understanding and they make me feel like I'm not alone in what I'm dealing with. Thank you so much for all that you do for so many people. The world needs more stylists -- and more people in general -- like you.
I completely understand. I don’t deal with anemia but i struggle with depression, i guess not always tho. Happiest I’ve been was when i was being raised by my grandpa(papa) he always liked my long loose curly hair. But about 4 years ago he passed away in a tragic accident. I cut all my hair off that day because i felt there was no point anymore. Been growing it since and haven’t brushed it out in at least a year and now I’m too embarrassed to go to a local shop. Im still lost but I’m trying to be in a better place. Sorry for commenting this to a complete stranger don’t know if you will even read this…. But thanks for listening if you do. 🙌🙌🤙
I deal with anemia as well…I have found a solution by going to Walmart salon where they charge $5 for a wash. Or, when I wash my hair at home I sit down in the shower because I get too exhausted standing, and I have a stool right outside the shower so I can sit right away. Anyway, these are things that have helped for me. They are best case scenario and I still have bad times like now as I’m dealing with an enormous knot but I’m always striving to do better!
@@KiddBuu-il4gp More people understand this situation - and you - than you would believe! 💞 Just *reading* your comment is comforting ME, so thank you for being candid.🌻 I'm 'here' because for the SECOND time in 2 years I've got a huge tangled matt in my long hair.🤦 I think I can get it out this time, but last time I had to go to a salon and get it cut out. The way I made it out to a salon was realizing the stress from my embarrassing predicament was causing me *more* stress and embarrassment, (those fabulous vicious cycles) so I told myself I *needed* to handle it asap. Also, I called around, spoke to the stylist I'd chosen, explained my issue and how embarrassed I was. When I got there ALL the stylists were so kind and understanding - they took me in a special little area so I didn't feel 'as' awkward. Now, not all salons may be as understanding, but sometimes we just have to say *SO WHAT?* You know - it *only* took 2 hours to repair the predicament I'd been living with for *months* and I never had to see those people again (tho I do, as this is now my salon). I felt so much better once it was done - one less thing to be anxious and angry at myself over, you know? As a bonus present to myself, I had them do my makeup, so when I left the salon I felt like a million dollars!!💃 I was so happy and proud of myself!💪💅 I know it's been over a week since you posted this, but I'm interested to know if you've resolved your situation and how? Take care, sweetie!!✌️
@@secretTarg you responded to someone else but I have a question for you….so I just got a huge tangle out of my hair myself last month. I think I should have gone somewhere because it turns out I was not gentle and ripped out a lot of hair. Now my ponytail looks really sad…just curious when you went to a salon if you lost a lot of hair (NOT for the next time I do this, because you know, there won’t be a next time. Hopefully. Fingers crossed.) I’m thinking I should get a short haircut but I don’t really want to…anyway, thanks for any input!
@@chigurl4667 It’s normal to lose a lot of hair when removing a large tangle/matting. Hair falls out naturally and sheds, so a large amount of that shedding would have been stuck in the matting, which comes out when removed. I wouldn’t worry too much about it, but if it is something that is worrying you, I would recommend going to a professional and asking for advice!
I just popped on here after spending 2 hours detangling the front of my natural 4c hair after a 3 month depressive episode. You’re doing a very good job. May God bless you and be there for you as you have been there for them❤️
My partner was never taught how to care for his very textured/curly hair, and he has ended up with matting like this. It’s very very nice to see someone taking care of a client without shaming them.
The hairdresser has the patience of a saint. She made this clients hair so gorgeous.i can't believe what a miracle she pulled off. I'd like to have her do my hair too and get to meet her She's great. Best makeover I've ever seen. I absolutely am awed.
Nobody knows where my husband got his beautiful curls from, we don't know his paternal family. It breaks my heart the effort he put on the years I helped him learn to care for his hair. He would get it matted and it was just so dry too.
Had a time where my hair was matted real bad for a similar reason. I'm the only person in my family with curly hair (3a) and there wasn't many people in my area with a similar hair type (most people's hair is straight or has a very slight wave). I figured out that keeping my hair shorter has helped and it has taken me years to figure out how to properly handle my hair (and even to this day I'm still learning).
When I was in the hospital, my nurse spent hours unmatting my hair for me, she put it in platts so it wouldn't get matted during the rest of my stay. I don't think many people realize how much of a difference this makes to someone struggling.
I have had multiple clients through the years walk in needing help with their knots. This is more common than people realize and it’s okay to ask for help!! I was more than happy to sit and help someone get rid of their knots. It’s okay, we all go through things. 💞
Could you please give me product recommendations my MIL is bedbound and here hair is severely matted, I'm desperate to help but haven't found the correct products that will help x
I love how she calls all her clients beautiful. It makes me feel pretty and I’m literally not even there and my hair is fine. She’s so sweet though I can’t
I sat here and cried right along with her. I've had my own journey of depression and low self esteem. I am so proud of you for the journey you've taken.
I remember when I was about 11/12 ish my hair was extremely matted. I was getting rejected at hair salons to fix it. Not as bad as this, but still pretty bad. I was getting bullied at school at the time and was pretty depressed. My friends at the times grandma, helped me get the hair untangled and got it to be pretty normal after everything...So grateful for her at that time.
Last year I went through a really bad depressive time for a few months and I never washed or brushed my super long curly hair. You can imagine how tangled that would get in just a day. But I always wore it in a bun on top of my head so it was out of my face. I left it there for months never taking it down and brushing it out. You can imagine where this is going. So in October, I decided to finally try detangling it bc my birthday was coming up (and then my wedding in November). I struggled so much I broke down and cried and my husband (fiancé at the time) came in and tried to brush it out but he ended up making it so much worse, and made it extremely tight on my scalp, it was so so painful. So for the next 2 weeks, my mom tried to detangle it for hours every single day until finally I went to a salon where they loosened it from my scalp, which revealed how much damage was actually done. I was bald all on the sides and back of my head. I was absolutely devastated bc I wanted to wear my natural curls for my wedding day. I went into the salon again the next day and told them to just shave everything off bc there literally was nothing to save. Hardly anything on top to cover the baldness it was just so so bad. I really thought I was going to leave the salon a wreck bc I didn’t have any hair anymore. But really I felt liberated. I felt so free. Not just from the weight of all the hair hanging off my scalp, but from the emotional baggage that it also carried. The stylists were so so kind and sympathetic and one of them even helped me get a wig and style it for my wedding the next month. My hair has grown out quite a bit since and my curls are coming back slowly but surely. I’ll always be grateful to those stylists who brought me in with no judgment or questions. They saved me.
You made me cry. When I was about twelve, I started doing hair around the neighborhood. You reminded me of a young girl whose hair I cleaned up. She had lice so bad and her hair was so matted everyone thought it was short. She cleaned up so good. I was so proud and her hair was silky like this lady's hair when qe finished. You are a beautiful soul❤
I recently started going to cosmetology school but still didnt know what my passion was. Through watching your videos, I now know what i want to do with my license when i get it.
I can’t believe someone actually helps people with this for a living. How freaking cool. As a Caucasian autistic person with extremely long and thick hair that I struggle to maintain, my hair mats on a regular basis. I ended up switching to ACV and baking soda with in between honey/oil/egg masks years ago and that’s honestly been the best thing for my hair. Even when I go for long periods of time without brushing/washing due to burnout/depression, it still detangles and demats a lot easier. This is SO COOL that you help people with this, saving their hair. My hair was part of my identity (still is lol) and I’m sure MANY people feel this way. Thank you for all you do!!!! Edit: wow it looks AMAZING when it’s complete!! That girl must’ve cried for days with gratitude!!
Girl, I've been using baking soda and apple cider vinegar in my hair for the last month and a half. Night and day difference. I'm never buying shampoo and conditioner again for as long as I live. After I get out of the shower I slap some organic cold pressed olive oil mixed with some of my favorite essential oils for hair health/growth like rosemary for example. So amazing. My hair feels so light and clean and always smells good and always shiny. Even my scalp feels airy and healthy.
Yes! I've started adding oils to my routine too. I always use an intense leave-in treatment too. I've had bouts of illness recently plus a very busy work schedule. I smother my hair in it. Even without weeks of washing, the mats come out super easy!
@@TheRealSmokahontas, j'utilise le citron et le bicarbonate de soude pour mes dents mais je n'aurais jamais penser que c'était bon pour les cheveux, même si je me fais des rinçages au citron et au miel.. J'utilise aussi de la farine de seigle, comme shampooing, me fais des masques avec des décoctions de graines de lin noir, ou de flocons d'avoine et de poudre de guimauve.. Ils sont aussi tres bons pour la peau. Je vais tester le romarin, même si mes cheveux poussent vite, j'adore l'odeur de cette plante et toutes ses propriétés... Merci pour vos bons conseils... ❤❤❤❤🇨🇵
Taking care of someone’s hair is such a pure act of love and kindness. I spend hours removing burrs and mats from my favorite horse’s hair when I visit him and he always seems so grateful. Thank you for helping this woman in such a compassionate way!
When it takes literally all your energy to get through your day, it's hard to do those things to take care of yourself. When I was at my lowest, my husband would have to help me undress and lead me to the shower because just the thought of taking a shower was exhausting. I am so proud of this young woman for taking her life back and getting the help she needed. What a transformation! Thank you for your compassion and empathy for all of your clients!
God bless your husband for helping you, I remember going weeks without showering because I felt the same exact way and my boyfriend would just judge me and tell me how he showers everyday and it’s not that hard to just go shower that I looked a mess and it broke me honestly
I have had depression my whole life. I was the same at one point, a functioning addict. I'm 33 with 3 kids and I still struggle to see any value in myself, and I struggle with self care. I'm years clean but still, it's hard. I'm so happy for her that she is better in herself ♡ I hope to get to that point too.
I can't imagine how much that must have hurt to have that entire ball of hair pulling on that small section of hair. Her hair looks gorgeous! Amazing work as always ❤️
I’ll be honest. At first look at the title I began to ponder why someone couldn’t brush their hair for so long but as I watched and her story got explained it dawned on me how quick it is to judge another person without knowing them… I’m struggling with not so much addiction but I can heavily relate to depression and how hard it is to take care of yourself let alone do anything else. I’m sorry to initially judge and it’s so awesome to see the transformation. Please keep doing what you’re doing!
I lost nearly all my teen years and my adult years to depression, seeing how lovely, kind and compassionate you are just makes my heart happy. Your compassion will encourage people. Subscribed to you.
I spent 2 days helping my friend detangle her 11 year old daughter’s heavily matted hair (more than this). I could tell they were both so embarrassed. I made sure to not pass any judgement and joked and laughed and had as much fun as we could, letting her play with all my apps on my phone like Snapchat. Her daughter was in tears thinking she had to cut it super short (it was so long) and once I started I gave her hope. We didn’t have to cut it! I taught them how to deal with and care for easily tangled hair, gave them a detangle comb and tried to empower them for the future as much as possible. Ish happens. We all need more kindness. Love this ❤️
@@pandurr6283 After you brush it, put it in a low braid. Rarely wear hair loose. When you shampoo your hair and rinse it out, you can put around 2 tablespoons of Braggs Apple Cider Vinegar in a gallon of water and rinse your hair with it again. Just pour on top of your head. Make sure your eyes are closed. Apply conditioner afterwards. When you get out of the shower apply organic extra virgin coconut oil all over your strands. Let it air dry. Use a wet brush or wooden brush and put in low braid. Done. Only do the ACV method every 3 months.
@@AmyLeeAngelLove Tyvm for posting that as I'm in a similar bind and am inches away from chopping it off myself. It's been forever since I've gotten it this long though and really want to save it if I can. Can you please tell me how the ACV and coconut oil helps? I have two matted areas on the back fairly close to my scalp. After my Mom passed suddenly a year ago, I just stopped washing my hair being so depressed. After four months I lazily and quite foolishly decided I just wouldn't wash or comb my hair until the one year anniversary, as a dedication to her. She'd be laughing at me now, lol. Ty again. Peace.
@@amyjoyce2301 I am so sorry about your mother. Depression can take over our lives. The same thing happened to me and I was left with my hair being severely matted. Make sure you do not wash your hair when the strands are knotted together. You can set the knots and could make it impossible to remove. This is what I did. Put a good movie, show, or long UA-cam video on. Get really comfortable. Soak your matted hair in coconut oil (an entire bottle of Vo5 conditioner may help too). Take a metal rat tail comb (long piece is metal, comb is plastic) and start picking away at the knots with the metal piece. Make sure you start at the very end. Do it very gently so your hair doesn't break. Use your fingers too when you start to see the hairs coming apart. So it's not so overwhelming, I would just do one matted area one day and the the other the next day. Once you are able to remove every single knot, wash hair with Vo5 shampoo (my favorite). If your hair is prone to tangles, you can use up to 3 tablespoons of ACV in 1 gallon of water. ACV cleanses the scalp, softens the strands (less knots), and makes your hair very shiny. After you do a ACV rinse, slather your mane in Vo5 conditioner. Leave it in for 10 minutes... rinse. When your hair is still wet, apply organic extra virgin coconut oil. Coconut oil makes hair easier to brush without causing breakage. Any knot you may have becomes easier to untangle. Wait until your hair is 100% dry before using a wet brush or wooden brush/comb. Put in low braid if your hair is long. These are my favorite hair ties that prevent split ends and breakage... and they STRETCH. www.amazon.com/gp/product/B07WNG7TT8/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_search_asin_title?ie=UTF8&th=1 Every time you want to treat your hair, you can do an ACV rinse but make sure it's not too often... once every 1-3 months, use 100% flaxseed gel and wash out afterwards (you can find out how to make from any UA-cam video), and steam your hair. You can find a hair steamer on Amazon. These methods will prevent knots, take out knots, prevent breakage, prevent dryness, and make hair very soft. Don't forget to always use 100% organic coconut oil on wet hair and never brush or comb hair until it's 100% dry. If you want hair to your hips or longer.. that's the way to go. I hope you are able to solve your hair issue. If you have any more questions or concerns, feel free to let me know. 🙂
@@AmyLeeAngelLove Thanks so much! I made some mistakes from before you replied but so far had only gotten half way through one matted section (it took hours). For instance I had already washed my hair - four times! I also cut some out with a scissors in frustration. Better late than never to start correct though. I do have a couple of questions about the advice for the future but I'll save them because I'd like to update you on the finish. Btw, it so happens I have ACV and the best coconut oil in the house already, which I use for cooking. I use Pantene conditioner but will try Vo5. Ty again for taking the time. I parted my hair on the side and separated the healthy from the matted, braiding it. Both have inspired me!
I’ve been a stylist for 30 years and I have seen a lot. There are not too many people like you out there and I just wanted to say thank you. For doin what you do and just being you ❤.
i'm SO proud of this woman!! getting out of addiction is such a hard battle n i'm so grateful you are able to help her feel better about herself. she is a strong amazing woman n i hope that this is a reminder of how much she has overcome.
I can’t imagine living with that for 3 years. It had to hurt and I bet she had a terrible time trying to get comfortable at night. Glad she’s all fixed up now!
When I wrote this comment, my hair looked like this. Glad to say now my hair is a lot healthier. I cut it off, its a lot more manageable, with shoulder length still. Im happy. Getting my hair combed out was helpful in getting me through this depression. Im still struggling and just suffered a tragic loss but seeing this comment and where I've come in 6 months was really nice
i'm 19 and currently struggling mentally, i have finally gotten the will to brush my hair, though the matting isnt as bad as hers, its still painful and irritating, this is really helping me feel less alone, thank you.
I've got several disabilities, and especially headaches, and not only do I understand how this happens, but I can't imagine how painful that large mat must have been. I'm so glad you're bringing light to this and helping people.
Same! I have shaved my hair before because it was REALLY long and got matted after a very unfortunate incident involving my chronic illnesses where I, well, I don't know, bc I was not conscious of anything. I had shaved it, in many styles, as a college student, but this time it was literally just because I couldn't work out the thick mats due to my pain and intense migraines. I'm currently trying to find a way to get these mats out without shaving it, which is why I searched for videos like this. Being bed-ridden with so many health issues just sucks bc I just cannot do things for long, extended periods sometimes, including dealing with my hair. 😔
@@killerlalu1 that's so relatable.. because of my disability I can barely keep my arms and hands up long enough to brush my hair for a few minutes daily... know if I missed a day I'd end up like that in an instant. shit's hard... hope you can save your hair.
I remember having hair like this when I was 15, just starting highschool. I remember I thought I was just lazy, but in retrospect I was in a terrible state for a couple years after my little sister died, and she died just before I started highschool. I couldn’t do anything, I didn’t bother with grades, schoolwork, healthy eating, body care, nothing. I didn’t even feel bad, I just felt nothing. I didn’t care what anyone thought, I was in my own world of nothingness. My hair had 2 sizable mats, and we just ended up cutting the mats out and giving me a bob.
@Mo Chann Thank you so so much for posting this 💗 I have a very similar situation and I thought I was going crazy. My hair is horrible right now, it's matted like it never has done before. I have friends and family around me that don't understand HOW I could allow it to happen. Well, it's a very long story... I'm STILL trying to recover from losing 4 of my family members within 6 years, a broken wrist and constant migraines (which is actually how the tangles all started). If I say to anyone that I've been terribly depressed/, seems like no one understands. I'm like you, I'm where I don't care what anyone thinks.... this is a very devastating place to be. I just wish I could find someone to help me with these tangles. This happened once before and I finally went to a beatty shop, the lady almost pulled my hair out by trying to detangle from top to bottom on my very long hair. I KNOW that's not how you do it, I've had long hair a long time. I paid her $80 by the time she finished in two days session. She was horrible, I'll never go to her again. Anyway, I'm trying to untangle my hair this time by myself, I just can't afford that again.
@@bkc74445 I’m in the same exact position. For longest time, thought I was just lazy.. now I know it’s depression. Im successful hiding this from my family out of guilt. Ik if they see the state of my hair, they would shame me. This happen to me before 2 years ago, and I told myself I would never been in this position again.. but here I’m am. If you have any tips, please let me know it.
@@bkc74445 As someone who has had a lot of matting over the years due to depressive episodes, have you tried a wetbrush? It's the only thing that can get through my hair even if I brush it daily. But when I do have matting, it is so much less painful and painstaking. Figured I should at least put it out there!
@@probablypositivity8918 As someone who has this happen pretty often, I just rip it out until it’s detangled, I have hair that reaches my knees but because of my negligence it’s thinning, unhealthy and I have bald spots. My depression is so bad that you’d throw up if you heard how I live right now and I can’t bring myself to fix it. Trying to detangle my hair right now, seems impossible so I might give up.
@@diziax3335 Could cutting it some be helpful? Just to give you less to have to do? Hair care can take a lot of energy when you're depressed, even the basic stuff
Thank you for doing what you do! The hair dressers saying she couldn't get a pixie cut and wouldn't work with her piss me off. She was ready to try something to help herself and they judged her and shut her down. They could've done an edgy undercut with a little shave at the base with fun razor cuts on the front. Something. Then recomend her to come back for the pixie cut in a few weeks when the hair has grown. Glad she found you.
I really feel for this girl and others but I can also understand why the hair dressers couldn't do it, it took 2 whole days and they have to be making money it's their job so they wouldn't be able to take any appointments other than her for two days so it would have been really expensive and time consuming maybe she couldn't afford to pay a stylist for two full days work and couldn't expect them to be out of pocket 2 days money. Everyone needs to earn so don't be so quick to judge the hairdressers either. I know somebody who was in this position due to depression irl and I also know lots of hairdressers including my sister and best friend and seen them both comb and condition this girls hair for days after they finished work and it was hard work and really time consuming, they done it on their own time and out of the kindness of their hearts because they couldn't have done it in the salon when they worked for commission and tips they wouldn't have been able to afford to so probably would have had to comb for a couple of hours and cut short which still would have cost alot so if somebody hadn't much money shaving was probably the best advice the hairdressers could give this girl.
Totally. When I heard that bit I was like 😩 because I totally could have done a cute funky cut that could be graduated to a pixie in a couple months or something. Or a micro bob. Those hairdressers are obviously not very good at being flexible with their craft. She deserved better. Still, great she went on to be able to keep her hair, since it's bringing her so much joy!
@@roisinmcguckin7479 *The comment wasn't suggesting they detangle the hair, actually. So it wouldn't take two days. I suggest you reread it, because they were suggesting an undercut that can turn into a pixie cut in a few weeks
@@prinxen1733 it wasn't long enough the knot would have had to be untangled first if it was just cut off it would have been to short at parts and wouldn't have had enough length on top even for a pixie. I read it perfectly fine thank you but we can have different opinions that's fine, I'm not about to argue over it.
Thank you for showing me how to get my little girl’s hair untangled. She hates hair brushed and would scream and cry and even the slightest tug. At the end of the summer, her hair was completely matted from swimming with it in a bun and falling asleep on it. All I wanted to do was untangle it and cut it for her. I yanked on her head and made her cry needlessly so many times until I found your videos. It didn’t even occur to me to use the pointy end of the comb. 🤦♀️ I still feel awful, but thanks to you, problem is solved and she is slowly learning to trust me with a brush. Thank you and thanks to all the women who let you post their stories.
@@jenniferdaulby5519 that was my first instinct as well. Unfortunately her hair was completely matted. Any product we put in it just created more gunk in the matted parts, and we tried all sorts of stuff…It really had to be done painstakingly, strand by strand like she does in the video…my only regret is not finding her videos sooner. In retrospect, I really had no idea what I was doing and was just pulling on my child’s head and causing her unnecessary pain…🤦♀️once I realized you start at the ends and work with the end of the comb, I felt like a complete dumdum.
@@meaculpa6984 I see what you mean. That's why it's informative to watch the expert on this channel. So, weirdly, relaxing seeing her do this. Best wishes from Australia 🇦🇺 ❤
You are washing and detangling that negativity right out of her hair! Dealing with this must've been awful for her, it's wonderful that people like you are willing to compassionately help.
Thank you and all hairdressers that take the time to do this. I have a daughter with super thick hair and when she was younger, she lived with her dad. He sent her to me with a huge mat in her hair we went to the salon and they managed to fix it but it took that woman's whole shift to fix it. She was so nice about it too.
As someone who has battled drug addiction, depression, and anxiety, this video brought me to tears! Thank you for being such a beautiful soul and reaching out to people who need it. One person can change your entire life😊She looks amazing!
I hope this woman goes home and plays with her hair for DAYS. Look! It goes in a pony, and a bun, and I can French braid it, and I can put flowers in it… just run those fingers through and feel beautiful
I just love what you do. I’ve been dealing with bipolar depression for 10 years now & it’s destroyed my teeth so I understand what this woman is feeling. I’m so glad people like you exist in this world. Your work breathes life back into your clients & they must feel so good walking out with a fresh start.
@@lorirogers9304 I assume they mean they didn't brush their teeth and the enamel rotted away. The same happened to me when I was just a little kid. It never grows back. If I ever don't brush at least 2x and floss super super well every single day, my whole mouth will instantly be full of cavities... not a fun time
@Lori Rogers sometimes you can either brush your teeth or take a shower not both. I would go weeks without brushing my teeth, showering, or washing my hair. I could only do one maybe two self-care routines
hello fellow bean. I am the same. I used to be somewhat good looking too... had attractive gf's and was the host at a couple restaurants I worked at. It's crazy what I've become lol
Currently trying to get the mats out of my hair after a long depressive episode. You are an angel for doing this for people. It is so embarrassing to let hair get like this. It’s impossible for me to even ask for help. Thank you for being kind and understanding to people!
As a dog groomer, and a cosmetologis this is frustrating to watch because we have a specific tool that may make this so much faster. Splitting the hair with scissors with the growth of the hair and a Matt breaker tool. Bless you for doing this for her
I might cry! That was such a big knot and the way you trimmed her hair of the broken hair and broke back her natural waves.... I'm speechless. It feels like I'm witnessing this woman's first day of the rest of her life
I have been trying to find someone to help me with my hair, and have been unable to find anyone who is willing to do anything but cut it all off. I so appreciate what this woman at this channel is doing, and hopefully you can become as gifted as she is in truly helping people ❤.
That would be amazing doing compassionate hair styling, some people are embarrassed by their hair or lack of hair. I don't how many people need detangling/matted hair treatments but other things are embarrassed by I have instead very dry scalp I actually seen this Japanese asmr video of scalp cleaning didn't know there are professional scalp cleaners. Then are thinning hair/balding. And skin conditions so think would be great have more compassionate hair stylist
Wow. Thank you for admitting that. Your story is EXACTLY like my wife and I, minus the child. She has almost the exact same sort of knot on the back of her head and now that we are clean and she is on depression meds it is still weighing her down, both physically and emotionally. It's gotten to the point where she is willing to completely shave her head just so that she can move on. So, thank you. Both of you. So glad this video in particular exists!
I developed a large matt in my hair (a lot smaller than this one though) when I became bed-ridden for almost a month from severe food poisoning that turned into a bad intestinal infection. I was in so much agony that it didn't even cross my mind to brush my hair. I finally recovered, but now I had this matt in my hair. I attempted to cover it up for about a month or two, but it was still visible. I finally bit the bullet and spent a whole day detangling it myself, using a pair of scissors to cut away what I couldn't brush out. Thank you for sharing other people's similar stories - it's made me feel less alone!
Immediately she tells her how proud she is of her client and then acknowledged that her coming to get her hair done was an accomplishment. Sometimes, just recognition and affirmation of little steps as being big accomplishments can mean so much. 🥰 Love what you're doing! 💗
I love that you talk about her struggles in a positive way, focusing on the accomplishments she's made, no matter how small. Having clean hair again definitely gave her some of her dignity back. You're able to walk around with your head a little higher.
What an amazing lady, who has gone through so much and is coming back so strong. Her openness in the chair feels like a wonderful shifting of weight - leaving behind darker times as well as the tangles. You provide a wonderful service x
I love how you treat your clients with such respect and dignity. Her hair was stunning after. I’m so glad you were able to help her and everyone else you help.
Your patience is straight up SAINTLY. Seriously! I get frustrated when my weaving gets a little tangled, or when my crochet gets tangled, and those have significantly fewer strands involved!! Major props to you for this!
why is there not more about this on the internet? I have detangled my own hair myself at from worse points than this, but there is nothing on the internet about this happening thank you for doing what you do, these videos have been the only reference I have to this happening to others and it has been a source of strength.
It's not the weight of the hair that is the touching part here, it's the weight off her soul that the hair represented. I'm just going to call it LOVE, you are doing the Lord's work with what you do. Congratulations to her for all the work she has done and the success coming her way.
I remember when I was pregnant for my daughter the father left me and I was alone for 7 months of torture throwing up EVERY single day I had a really tough pregnancy to the point I could barely shower and brush my hair regularly so I got a matte in the back and after I gave birth my sister took me to get rid of the matte and I'm so grateful to that stylist she saved my hair and the first time I ran my fingers thru it I cried it felt so good, my daughter is 6 now but I'll never forget that hair matte that literally took up most of my thoughts it was so controlling something as minor as having matted hair, so I can imagine the relief and freedom she felt after that, I was swinging my hair for days after that lol
Madame Hair Stylist and Human Saver, you are truly a Kindness Warrior. Getting folks who are in a place where they're unable to do the things to make them whole again back to level or thriving really takes a team of people who specialize in what they specialize in. You are just amazing.
When I was 11 years old I went through a year of depression. I hid a tangled mess of hair under a low pony tail. One day a friend came and visited and wanted to do my hair. I was ashamed and eventually showed her my hair. She didn't bat an eye and lovingly spent the rest of the day gently untangling my hair. I never once even felt a tug of pain. It was such a confidence booster. God's grace came in this loving act of service. Never again did I let that happen.
super sweet 💜
❤️❤️
How beautiful 💗
That’s amazing so sweet! 🖤
so beautiful
I really like that you don't show people's face. It allows them to share their story, show a lot of empathy but don't exploit them. Your videos are very inspiring.
👏👏👏😍😍😍
This
I totally agree ! She is a real lady in every sense of the word!
So True❤️
Yes, in an ideal world there would be no stigma or shame associated with mental health struggles but since there are still people who judge it's great that she does her videos in a way that lets people share their stories while protecting their identities.
when i had knotted hair like this and went to the hair salon they SHAMED me and other customers LAUGHED at me along with whispering to each other. I love how you create such a safe environment for them :(
I'm sorry you've had such an awful experience, they really shouldn't have shamed you!
Sorry to hear... some people are just awful
@Krystal Rodriguez I’m so sorry you experienced that.. They don’t know what you went through or dealt with that made you end up with your hair like that. The lack of empathy and compassion from people nowadays is sickening.. I hope you’re in a better place now. ❤️
I'm so sorry!!
Same. It felt so upsetting and they couldn't even unmatt it. I was so embarrassed and I felt like crying, they kept asking me how it happened and I just said that I didn't brush it. My auntie was so much more nice and she actually got it out, she's so nice.
What I'm hearing is that not only has she beaten her addiction(with her son!) and reached out for help with her hair, but she's also FORGIVEN HERSELF. I'm so proud and happy for her.
When I was in middle school I had my hair matted just like this so I went to supercuts and the manager judged me and told them to shave all of my hair off and made jokes about my hair with the other workers but a sweet amazing woman just like you told them she would spend however long to make sure I had my beautiful curls back and she did! 2 hours later and I didn't have to shave off my hair I am forever grateful for that woman and so glad there's people out there just like her❤
It's so rude to make fun of people. I'm glad she helped you God bless her and God bless you
Super cuts franchise should be crucified for treating you like this
Very similar situation happened to me when I was younger smh.
People like this are the worst. I'm sorry she treated you like that. Misery loves company. I'm sure karma came back to get her ever worse. Smh
@@laurayeates2478 I think you didn't read the comment till the end. It was the woman who helped. She wasn't the bad person here. The bad people were the saloon manager & workers.
This is beautiful. I didn’t have the best home life as a child and matted rats nests in my hair were common. When I was 11 a girl my age talked to me and brought in hair care items and tools. She spent class all year taking care of my shame. Our teacher would thank her each week. You shine bright!
Thank you for sharing your story!
What a beautiful soul she was 🙏🏾
That’s so kind of her, are you still friends with her?
This is incredible ❤️
My hair got like this as a child too. It’s been decades since that time, but my therapist finally named neglect for me.
I'm a stylist who detangles matts like this, and I've gathered from my clients that I'm the only one in my area that didn't turn them away and that's crazy to me because our job as stylists is to help people feel the best about themselves as possible not matter what, so to hear them say they wouldn't help or even in these comments that they were shamed is awful
That's the difference between doing your job just for the money and doing it as a vocation and a passion. You have a heart of gold, thank you for helping those people❤✨
Maybe they felt unqualified for that kind of job though. Bless you for helping people, but I can completely understand why stylists would turn this away. If you have no idea how to handle it best and are worried you’ll make it worse/painful then I can’t blame them at all.
Thanks for your share. I was reading the comments because I'm trying to untangle my ladies bird's nest she is so uncomfortable all the time because of her hair that she'll spend each God givin day more miserable than the last . Please help me on what to do. It's mated and seems to be falling out a lot. She always has had beautiful thick long curly hair and now it's thinned out 30% and falling out in chunks. What do i do
@@vincentandreaccio3604 From doing my dog's tail, I learned it's not easy and very painstaking. I would take the hair and sometimes have to pull the strands that were not very tangles out one strand at a time. Other times, I would have to work from the ends and move by centimeters up the knot and detangling as I went. There were times that the tangle was so bad the I cut it a small bit to have a fresh edge. This fresh edge was just enough for me to be able to get the rest of the knot out. I know it may seem like a dog and your client may not be a good match, but my dog was a Maltese with extremely fine, static-y hair and I didn't want her to live with a shaved tail just because it tangle practically just by looking at it. For my own hair, I have to use a separate conditioner when I wash it (no 2 in 1 to try and skip a step) that I leave on while I bathe myself, rinse it with warm water, pat dry with a torn, then apply a detangler, and start the comb out with a wide tooth comb starting at the ends as I work my way up the shaft. I then use a brush and finish with a fine tooth comb.
Where are you located at
When I was depressed as a teen and didn't brush my hair, my mother and her husband responded by cutting huge chunks out of my hair saying I didn't deserve hair if I wouldn't look after it. Seeing people like this being cared for and being helped slowly helps heal me of my trauma. Keep going everyone, it will get easier
I'm sorry they did that. You deserved so much better. Your mom didn't know how to love her baby right. It isn't your fault.
That's an inexcusable way to treat a child. You deserved nice hair, you deserved to have your body respected, and you certainly deserved compassion after everything you'd been through previously
Everybody is different and being kind is what this platform is about. Please don’t call someone a liar based on your own bias. It’s rare for people to lie about their traumas. How did she gain attention? She expressed herself as you had the right to express yourself and she didn’t seek to hurt anyone or control what they say as you have. Please be kind, respectful and open - minded. Have a blessed day. @@JustYourAverageCommenter
My mom was the same
I'm so, so, sorry that you had to go through that😢 I'll be praying for you sweetie ❤🙏❤
Depression is a crippling disease. When my father died I couldn’t even get out of bed let alone brush my hair. It would just go into a bun.. luckily I got help before it got beyond my control. But I absolutely understand.. and you’re an angel for being so caring and empathetic! You’re a QUEEN!
I’m so scared for my father to die..he’s only in his mid 50' but death can be anytime and he’s the only adult I trust :( I’m 17
@@dreamcatcherismylifesuppor2348 I completely understand sweetheart. It’s not an easy thing to go through but your father raised you to be strong and I promise that no matter what, you’ll get through it. My father has been gone 18 years this coming October. It gets easier with time but you’ll always have that longing for him. I always feared that I’d forget what he sounded like so take videos and all the keepsakes you can. And I’m always here if you ever need to talk!
Beautiful
Do you mind sharing what kind of help you got? I’m really struggling and have been in a rut for a while I don’t even know where to start to get out of it ):
@@Puuuurrrr I went to therapy for about 6 months. It taught me how to grieve and how to deal with the depression and anxiety. I also would go on drives alone and listen to a lot of music.
I have been struggling with pretty severe depression as well as other mental health issues for about 4 years. For about 2-3 years I was basically bed ridden. I also wasn't brushing my hair and it kept getting matted in the place I would lie down, but i was so lucky to have my mother who would sit me down for around 30mins to 1hr 30mins everytime my hair got really bad. I would be in a lot of pain but I loved getting my hair back. Now I'm going out, I have a job and I'm back in education, and I adore my hair. I lost about 4 years of my life to horrific depression and it genuinely makes me tear up to think of all the things I missed, I still struggle everyday but I always go out, and go to work and take care of myself, which is something I'm insanely proud of, hence why I'm sharing this!
Edit: genuinely thank you so much for all the kind messages, ill continue to respond in the comments but i just wanted to say the support from everyone has made me so happy, im crying tears of joy right now. Im proud of everyone and I'm happy for anyone to share their stories (its quite cathartic) ill try my best to reply.
you still have time don’t worry you’re going to have lots of opportunities to do the things you always wanted to do, especially now that you made all of this progress !! don’t be too hard on yourself and even though i’m a complete stranger i’m proud of you
@@5pringchild thank you so much! Have a nice day, and I really hope you're doing well
I'm going through this as we speak. I'm fighting to stay alive. I really want to end my life. Depression sucks.. I've been wearing wigs my entire life I never have the strength to do my hair.. let alone enjoy my life.
@@PJ-bc1yw I do believe in you! (I'm so sorry if I come off as patronising I am not trying to be) I cant speak for the exact situation you are going threw, but what got me to take a step in the right direction of mental health was that I got bored of staying in and watching UA-cam, it sucked at the time but was good in the long run because it meant I wanted to get out. I don't know how your depression effects you but if you are living on UA-cam like I was I beg you to keep on going because eventually something will switch and you might start wanting to go out again. I also don't know if you are on meds or getting help but if you aren't I beg you to tell your doctor and someone close to you, once I got bored of UA-cam I got extra help which really pulled me out of the gutter, I'm also on medication which is important because it allows my brain to think normally instead of overwhelmingly negatively, so if you aren't on meds I recommend talking to your doctor about it and going from there (I'm not saying you will try to overdose but if you are suicidal it might make it easier for someone close to you to give out your medication) I am proud of you! you keep fighting I really do believe in you. if you are struggling or need advice i'll be here lurking in the comments (for all my improvement I still spend most of my time inside) so i'll be here if you need a stranger to talk to, just make sure you talk to a doctor too :)
@@PJ-bc1yw , your comment make me sad. You are precious, i’m sure there is a lot of people around you that love and need you!
You are stronger than you think : it need so much courage just to wright that comment and to admit what you are going thru.
(i hope you understand . My english is not very good !)
I send you love, light and blessings from Switzerland ✨💕
People don't understand that mental illness and addiction can manifest in different ways. I'm glad that there are stylists like you out there who help.
Currently dealing with the above for said reasons seeing your comment meant alot Someone sees our pain for what it is
They really don’t
Clippers
You are an angel!
I just don’t think it should get in your way to care for yourself if you’re an adult.
I went through something VERY similar except i ended up in jail with this same problem. I tried my very best to keep it concealed by wearing my hair in a bun bc i was too embarrassed to let anyone see it or ask for help. But being confined in such a small space my cell mate ended up seeing it and insisted on helping me fix it. She realized how embarrassing it was for me and that I didnt want anyone to know so we locked ourselves in for an entire day and put paper on the window so noone could see what we were doing. Until today I never told a soul about it and had no intention of ever telling anyone. It's surprising to hear theres so many similar stories out there. It's a great reminder to ppl that you are not alone and to not let fear make you be afraid to ask for help. We all have our struggles in life(some more than others) and there shouldn't be any shame in it.
❤
That was so sweet of her ❤ I just got my hair detangled tonight after having a huge depression mat in it for the past month, you’re definitely not alone!
❤
💕💕💕
Some amazing people in prisons
I'm a recovering addict as well-just got an apartment after three years of homelessness. I'm physically and mentally disabled. It's true, like the client said in the beginning- you do not get encouragement often for doing what society says you should do....but for some of us, doing what we are told we should is so difficult it's nearly impossible. As the stylist says, you never know what someone is going through- you also don't know how hard those things are for some people. Be kind.
I'm so happy for you for getting an appartment after struggling with addiction! That must have taken so much hard work and effort. You deserve to be proud of that.
Proud of you, Christina.
@@mollyoly Thank you!!
@@yltraviole I am really proud, thanks!
I'm so proud of you Sis!!💙💙
I love that it doesn’t matter what the problem is or who has the problem or their skin color, you help all women get that confidence back and that they feel liberated! This is how we all should be!
that’s how it’s supposed to be..
Amen sister
@@rexai180 you’re right, but it isn’t always. I love all women and men. Black, white, gay, bi, transgender ANYTHING but not all people feel like way. This lady is a saint.
And men!
@@morganbarfield108 trueee aff
Just the way you touch the hair lovingly makes me cry a little. Modern life can be so sarcastic and combative and lonely
You are so right. I don't understand the meaness that is becoming the norm in today's society!
I like that too very much❤️
🙌🏼👏🏼🙌🏼👏🏼 Simply said but powerful.
Social media anonymity allowed most people to feel comfortable in the absolute worst about themselves. And then people started speaking uo about how that effects them. Now they're seen as the attackers and that "political correctness" is taking over. When really, most people just want to he allowed to live without judgements. But too many people take social media and run with it. Every one is judge jury and executioner too, now it doesn't matter what "side" you're on. Everyone and everyone can be a target to hate, and people who thought they were on the good side are often just as cruel. Add in mob mentality, the world in flames and corporate greed and exploitation slowly stripping us of our humanity. People are definitely more miserable and hostile and trying to eek out whatever little ego boost they can.
Theres such a loving emotion with someone fixing your hair. My first grade teacher who was like a scarier version of Professor McGonagall, saw the matted mess that I had compulsively created by rubbing my bangs in circles. She came over and politely asked me what I was doing to my hair and subsequently began gently untangling it. It changed her in my mind forever especially in a time when I needed it badly. Small kindnesses can make big differences.
Rubbing your bangs in circles? Like against your forehead? /genq
@@flamefangstar correct
There is a special kind of intimacy to fixing or styling someone's hair that's hard to describe.
@@Emper0rH0rde so true!
@@Emper0rH0rde the grooming of another is a nigh primordial tradition in displaying affection, most animals that can display higher forms of affection have some form of it. what you feel when someone grooms your hair is the same feeling that your primate ancestors felt all those millions of years ago, a love more timeless than the birds, the trees, or the rivers which flow idly by.
I have extremely thick red hair and when I was about 10 I got a rat's nest in the back (not as big as this one, but it was still quite large). Everyone at school, including my teachers, teased me about it until my mom decided to comb it out. The entire time she was berating and beittling me about it. I was a kid! I didn't know how to take care of my hair. it was a tramatic experience and caused me to hate my hair or anything related to it. I wish there were more empathetic people like you.
That's so harsh of your mum, at that age if you can't do it that's on her!! And she could've stepped in earlier or at least been nice about it 😔
I bet your mother has narcissistic personality disorder. Same thing happed with my mother and she's a narc.
Wow, that was your mother's responsibility, not yours... Red hair is the most gorgeous color ❤️
Your mother sounds just like mine used to be ….she blamed me for her failures …it is a parents duty to look after the child and she failed you by not helping you keep your hair in good condition …..I’ll take a bet and say she was regularly going to the salon for Haircare and beauty needs while you suffered with that rats nest ?
@@beckyluvstoscrapnsew Yes, you are correct. She would also buy the best haircare products for herself and made my siblings and I use the cheap ones. That extends to other things as well, like menstrual products. The pads she bought for us were horrible and leak (and we were forbidden to use tampons, because only hussies use those), while she used high quality ones. She also had them counted,,so if you tried to steal one of hers she'd know.
I wish I had known of you when I was going through the darkest time of my life. I spent six years of my life locked in my room. I didn’t go outside. Not even out to the kitchen unless I was certain no one was home. I was so depressed I didn’t take care of myself, physically, mentally, or hygienically. I didn’t have the energy to shower, to even COMB my hair. It got so bad that my entire head turned into a rats nest and I felt so helpless I assumed the only option was to shave it off. I did everything to try and untangle it. Every diy at home treatment I could find I was determined to get that rats nest untangled. Nothing worked. But I desperately wanted to keep my hair, I didn’t want to lose it all. So I spent a week and a half combing through my hair with a rat tail comb until it was untangled enough I could use a normal brush to do the rest. I haven’t allowed myself to go that far again and I finally pulled myself out from that deep depression and got a job and began spending as little time at home as I could. I’m grateful to myself for not giving up but I just wish I’d have had someone like you there to make me feel human when I felt my lowest.
I’m there right now. I have spent 7 years in my room and don’t take care of myself either. I don’t see an end in sight. In fact, if I died tomorrow that would be okay.
Newry
@@alittlewheiser521 No, please, don't say that 🥺. You can do it! You can get out of this and shine bright 💕. I know we don't know each other, but I'll be here if you ever need someone to talk to. You matter 💕.
SO proud of you!! 💖 You're amazing!!
@@alittlewheiser521 How are you? We are here for you still ❤
When I first met my boyfriend's grandmother she had thigh length hair she wore in two braids. She had become less aware of what she was doing when brushing and was wrapping the hair around her brush and the middle back was actually like felt. I spent the whole weekend detangling her hair. Because I am tender headed I was very gentle and she never protested my combing like she did from others.
You have a beautiful soul❤️ God bless you.
You did what no other person was willing to do or just spend time with her. I'm sure you made her feel like a queen.
More than a salon, this is a ministry of love
This
It was so satisfying to be the 100 like lol
Amen
Yessss. This video was like a therapy session. I love this woman's story. So powerful. Then Aaliyah kicked in...
😭😭😭
You both have so much patience. If my hair got like this, I would go short. I barely could stand the end of day -matting when I was a kid.
Great job!!
My cousin went through the same thing and was considering shaving her head. I spent an entire day helping her detangle as much as I could and ended up giving her a cute layered cut after we finally got it out. She was embarrassed and ashamed but I kept telling her that it's no big deal, I was happy to help her and it was so worth the effort. Really love the lack of judgement and support you show in these videos.
Are you a hairdresser
@@dreamcatcherismylifesuppor2348 not a professional one but I try lol
That is awesome Kodi, you are have a phenomenal heart. I am sure she was incredibly grateful.
I wished I had a cousin like you or a sister!
I was not so great and taking care of my hair- too much of the tomboy in me and well not doing anything for months it grew and grew but unfortunately wasted in Matt's >
I wish I could say I had someone in my life that helped me when I needed it. All my mom and sister kept saying was I needed to cut it. Was told I had no reason to be depressed.
When I was a teenager all of my hair wound up in a giant knot.....I wound up in a psychiatric hospital, and when I was there one of the staff members offered to help me brush it out. She said she'd done it for other patients before. I turned her down because I guess I was just still really ashamed and felt like I couldn't ask someone to do that for me, but the simple gesture of her just offering to help with no judgment at all meant so, so much to me and I'll never forget it. What you're doing is beautiful
@Kira I'm sitting here reading these comments watching this video wondering what the heck I'm going to do with my half head of severely matted hair right next to my scalp. How did you make out a month later. Did you get your matt out and if yes how did you do it? I need help desperately.
As a very young woman (I was born in the 1950s) there was a woman in my home city who had hair as matted as this right down to her waist. People called her ‘witch’ and ‘tramp’ but I could only wonder what must have happened to her to end up like that. She would come into the store I worked in and I always made sure to treat her with the utmost respect, even though she never bought anything. It turns out that her fiancé was killed in the war and she just gave up. She was also painfully thin. I will never forget her. Huge congratulations to your client on her sobriety. I’m so glad you could help her. Best wishes from the UK ❤😊
Thank you for this video. I gave birth to my stillborn daughter this year, one week before her due date. She was fullterm. A day before she passed, I was told there is a one in a million chance in anything happening and it did. So the trauma put me in a deep depression and I didn't shower for months. This video helped me get my hair back so thank you so much 🙏 I wish we had more kindness in the world like yourself 😢❤
God bless you, dear lady.
Im so sorry for your loss. God Bless you and your family. You are in my thoughts and prayers.
I'm so so sorry for your loss 💔❤
How heartbreaking, I'm so sorry.
I’m so very sorry for your loss! I am saying a prayer for you to feel the peace of God now. I lost a baby 15 years ago and it’s the worse kind of pain but God saw me to the other side. ❤️
I had hair down to my waist when I was depressed. My mother refused to let me cut it cause “girls should have long hair”. After three years of begging I got it cut. Mom said 8-10” and the lady “thankfully” heard 18”. I lost so much dead hair and it really helped me get healthy.
What did your mom say when you got it cut?
@@Serenityblu23 she was horrified. Oh she fussed at how short it was for weeks. But my mood brightened considerably.
@leo barely reached my shoulders. It was amazing.
Good for you. My mom is the same way. Sometimes, you gotta just take charge of your own happiness. I hope you do whatever you want to with you hair in the future. Your mom doesnt own your happiness, your body, or even your hair.
@@lilysong1321 I have come to think of shoulder length as a good length. It gives an impression of "long" while also being close to short. It also usually has enough length for a low ponytail.
My boyfriend and I, just like her, simultaneously wanted to get clean after nearly a decade of active addiction. Most other addict-couples aren’t so luck, so it’s always nice to run into another couple who proves that it IS possible. It’s going to be hard, but you can do!
Sober: 07/28/2019 🤘🏻🤘🏻
you want heroin you want heroin you want heroin you want heroin you want heroin you want heroin you want heroin you want heroin you want heroin you want heroin you want heroin you want heroin you want heroin
You’re amazing💜💜
My husband and I also got clean together 8 years ago!! We've been clean ever since and have never been happier. It is possible.
@@chandracox6814 you two are amazing🤍
So proud of you both!!
I can't tell you how many times I've sat and cried on my bathroom floor while brushing out matted hair because I hadn't taken care of myself for weeks. I was too embarrassed to ask anyone for help, so it's wonderful to see someone being kind and compassionate and understanding. Having mental health issues comes with a lot of stigma and you make these ladies feel loved with your care.
For the longest time I thought I was the only one. Thank you for talking about it. I feel less alone :) Have a great day.
Broke my heart to hear her say “we don’t hear it a lot”. Getting your life in order and into recovery is no small feat.
My hair was like this for 6 months because of my heavy addiction at the time. I’m 3 years sober now. So so proud of her getting in recovery!
i use to work drug rehab for years , i want to tell you , i am very proud of you and your recovery , it made me cry with joy ..you are awesome ..
Congrats on being sober love!! You're doing awesome! ✊💙
happy sobriety to you!
You are awesome! Keep it up👍🏽👍🏽👍🏽
Congrats on ur recovery one day at a time I'd been Clean for 7 and a half but relapsed due to loosing my husband, my soul mate on Feb 19th.... my hair has this going on so I'm just trying to see if it is possible to brush out or if I must shave it off....
Oh wow. When I went through clinical depression, my body reacted by packing on over 50 lbs in just a few months. Eventuality, it was an extra 75 lbs, which I then lugged around for 8 years. Last fall, I decided I had carried the scars of my illness long enough, and finally was ready to get rid of it. Today, I am down 70lbs, and it feels as good as getting that ball of dead hair off must have. Congrats, girl!
Well done proud of you.Hope your doing much better
Did you have surgery? Story sounds similar to mine.
A lot of people don’t realize but depression causes your cortisol hormone to spike which causes you to gain and retain weight. I have severe depression and my weight is a constant battle. I’m in a healthy range now. Congrats on the hard work!
You are amazing! Congratulations on your clarity, decision and incredible weight loss. I'm in the same situation, thank you for the inspiration.
I hope I can be like you someday! I’m depressed and I want to lose weight, but I’ve gained even more weight instead. I was overweight and wanted to return to a healthy weight, but I ended up becoming obese instead.
sometimes this is all a person needs, just someone who believes in them and takes time to make them shine again
you're a life savior
I wasn’t fully taught self-care, I was kind of just given a girl body book. My hair as a kid was matted and hidden under the longer hair on top for a long time until my parents remembered I had to get a haircut again. The man cutting my hair noticed what I’d been neglecting and my mom was fully convinced and telling me that I’d have to get it shaved. I was scared, but he combed through it all and I couldn’t be more grateful.
hope youre doing alright! i also struggled a lot with self hygiene and body caring younger. stay safe
This is how I was given the sex talk. I was given a book called something like What's Happening to my Body and that was it. My sisters and I all kept our copies because we couldn't believe that's how our mom went about it. We were also never taught how to care for ourselves but shamed for not knowing how. It's extremely stressful for a child. I hope you're doing better now. Therapy helped me a lot. I had to learn to reparent myself and be there for my younger self the way she deserved at the time. I wish you the best in your journey 💕
I wasn't taught anything other than how the absolute basics, didn't help that i am a guy with long hair and people tend not to give hair advice to guys for some reason
@@BrownEyedBeauty2008Oh hey, I had that book. It was a good book, but definitely not a substitute for parental support 😢
I love that she fought to keep her hair. It shows that even those who are suffering still have strength within them, and beliefs to hold on to. When you lose control of your life, it's important to identify things that you find are worth it to you, even if it may seem superficial to others.
I hope she goes home with the knowledge of how to take care of any more rat's nests that may pop up early on, as well as how to prevent them.
Pl
Oh my gosh IM GOING THRU THIS BUT ALSO HIDING IT WITH WIGS. This girls isn’t alone and I hope to not be alone in getting help.
I remember having to gently pull out knots in my best friends hair bc she was too depressed to brush her hair at age 16, I’m so happy that there’s a service that can do this now for people that are isolated or can’t get help from their friends 💖
You're a saint
I help my boyfriend all the time, long curly hair and depression is hard, thank you for caring for your friend too!
what i would do to have a friend like that, i wish you the best
You’re an amazing friend❤️
@@davehart2094 settle down Dave.
When I was in elementary school, I didn't take good care of my hair, and my parents didn't care enough to help me with it or teach me to take care of it. I ended up with a huge knot and my mom made me cut it all off. The hairdressers shamed me so bad, saying I was "too old to be like this." It was traumatizing. God bless you. Everyone is going through something
So sorry you had to go through this. I bet you have the best hair do in town now!
Shame on the hairdresser for doing that. I am sorry you had to deal with that
God bless you you little angel, you didn't deserve that
That's weird..when someone is trying to do better..you shame them. What aholes. Btw it's just hair. For people to be crazy over your own body, hair etc is weird too. Life is tough. Those are the least worries
I am so sorry you had that experience.
This woman treats people so well and doesnt shame them. So sweet
You're so kind, gentle, understanding and uplifting. I'm sure there's a lot of shame coming in and you've set her free. Bless you.
I don't understand why you don't have alot more subscribers, you selflessly help people regain their self confidence and it's a beautiful thing you're doing.
They are coming 🥰 trust the process.
You called me out. I responded. 💖 #Subscribed.
You got me. I always search for her videos, but never subscribed? Why? IDK. "I'm a subscriber! I clicked the button." (In my Destiny's Child singing voice)
You showed up on my recommended today., that’s how I have a new UA-camr watch, yay! You have the patience of a saint and do the work of one too. 🙏
I just realized I wasn’t subscribed! Thanks. #subscribed
"To set people free". Not physically, but spiritually and mentally.."
When you removed 3 pounds of her matted hair, you also set her free physically. ❤
💗
As I've also learned about hair, hair can hold so much negative energy just based off of your mental health, anyone touching it with the potential of having negative energy, and trauma so it did do something I cut my hair from every now and then get be relieved from all the pressure I was carrying
😅
This is the first video of yours I have seen. I was raised by addicts. The way you speak to your clients brings me to tears. Thank you so much for recognizing the beauty in your clients. The world usually sees them as monsters.
There are some monsters here in the comments that make me so ashamed of the human race. I need help with this myself. Depression is a bitch to live along side of. This has NEVER happened to me until it did. I let my hair grow long and ugly during Covid, longest it’s been since high school. I’ve worn it as a tausled pixie cut forever and was considered very attractive.
I’m WAY OLDER NOW and totally alone except for my dog and I’ve cried everyday so hard that this happened to me and it’s no one’s fault but my own. My sister in law (I asked her for help), told me that’s pure laziness and said she’s “out of this”. It’s been 3 weeks since I’ve tried working on it. My entire top part of my head is matted to right at my scalp. I CAN’T CUT IT OFF, I’ll be bald. I’m so embarrassed and ashamed but can’t find help.
My hair is very straight and fine. I didn’t think this could have ever happen to me, and I’ve no one who cares about me many years after a horrible divorce.
I just want to feel human again! 14:27
@@Symnsn You are not alone in this, stay strong, much love!
I once got a rats nest in my hair for not brushing in literal weeks when I was a child (think around 7). It made me feel insecure so I would wear a hoodie over my head to conceal it. One night my mom did brush it out, I was crying the whole time but she kept saying "it's alright, we're gonna get through this" and I thought about that time while watching this. You're a kind woman, doing god's work, thank you so much
Your mom sounds like a sweet woman 💕
Use a capital G when u type God please😊
@@keira2437 I'm in total agreement with you..🥰. God with a capital G....God.🥰🥰
How did your mum did not notice you didn't brushed your hair in WEEKS???
Aww that's my daughter's name. Hadassah. She told me I should have named her Elsa after Princess Elsa and I remind her I named her after a queen who almost single handedly saved her entire people from annihilation. She is starting to take to it now.
Extremely satisfying to see the hair come undone.
Remind her that Hadassa is the Hebrew name of Esther and that Esther is another form of Elisabeth which is another form of Elsa! She shares a name with two incredible queens and she can be proud of that.
Sorry to be that person but Elsa is a queen not a princess XD my Disney heard couldn’t let it go. Still a pretty name though!
I've had this problem in recent years, as I figure a combination of not brushing it out regularly especially during the pandemic but even before when I was depressed, it would get tangled from sleeping on it. After having a friend help me comb it out once, and paying a lady in a salon twice, I finally took control back myself and started buying detangling sprays ( there's a nice Olive Oil based one at Dollar Tree, 12 oz. For $1.). And I started combing it out after each shower and braiding it when wet. I figure that I always had fine tangly hair but the texture is more prone now that I am older it's naturally drier plus coloring it leaves it drier. So the olive oil or kids detangler and the braiding has helped a lot. But when I still get a matt or tangle from time to time, I try to get on brushing it out sooner. If the olive oil kind is too oily, try the kids' detangling sprays, or try mixing them together in your own spray bottle. I do this now because the kids'stuff smells better and is less oily but I need some of that oil.
@@joycefreeman5628 Kids stuff is so much better!! Same for mouthwash. Let us enjoy our lives.
@@hydroarchonfaker You couldn't "Let It Go"? Have you learned nothing from Elsa? 😆jk
I was very depressed for about three months straight this past year. I wasn’t able to get out of bed or out the door. My Caucasian hair became so matted in the back…I was so embarrassed I could let it get like this.
But I want to say - your video made me realize I’m not the only person going through something like this. Releasing the matted hair is also a way to release mental health back to a healthy state.
Thank you so much for what you are doing 💜
Right? The hair is like a physical representation of all that pain and hurt being felt. When it gets released, it’s like a ton of bricks off your psyche!
I can relate, Darling.
Once I spent an entire year in bed.
When I was in my twenties the same thing happened to me. I became extremely depressed and I didn't get out of bed for about 3 months. I finally pulled myself up and decided to get a shower and I realized that my hair was so matted, I didn't think I would ever get through it.
@@CynthiaPrice79 yes !
Im watching this while working on my own matted hair after a month in bed and drinking. I absolutely love and resonated with everything that woman said. every word that came out of her mouth is the truth. people on the outside cant comprehend what we are going through, even if they think they do. and Miss Hairdresser, you are TOTALLY amazing for helping these people out, and giving emotional support with no judgement. Today I decided to fix my hair and hopefully my life eventually. thankyou both for the inspiration.
I hope things get better for you, and I'm proud of you for doing what you can, when you can. ❤
@@RaeC5280 thankyou:) I did manage to get my hair brushed out with the help of my mom☺️
❤
❤
Depression and anemia often has me going months without washing my hair because I just don't have the energy. I think currently I'm on my third month or something? But these videos are so compassionate and understanding and they make me feel like I'm not alone in what I'm dealing with. Thank you so much for all that you do for so many people. The world needs more stylists -- and more people in general -- like you.
I completely understand. I don’t deal with anemia but i struggle with depression, i guess not always tho. Happiest I’ve been was when i was being raised by my grandpa(papa) he always liked my long loose curly hair. But about 4 years ago he passed away in a tragic accident. I cut all my hair off that day because i felt there was no point anymore. Been growing it since and haven’t brushed it out in at least a year and now I’m too embarrassed to go to a local shop. Im still lost but I’m trying to be in a better place. Sorry for commenting this to a complete stranger don’t know if you will even read this…. But thanks for listening if you do. 🙌🙌🤙
I deal with anemia as well…I have found a solution by going to Walmart salon where they charge $5 for a wash. Or, when I wash my hair at home I sit down in the shower because I get too exhausted standing, and I have a stool right outside the shower so I can sit right away. Anyway, these are things that have helped for me. They are best case scenario and I still have bad times like now as I’m dealing with an enormous knot but I’m always striving to do better!
@@KiddBuu-il4gp More people understand this situation - and you - than you would believe! 💞 Just *reading* your comment is comforting ME, so thank you for being candid.🌻 I'm 'here' because for the SECOND time in 2 years I've got a huge tangled matt in my long hair.🤦 I think I can get it out this time, but last time I had to go to a salon and get it cut out. The way I made it out to a salon was realizing the stress from my embarrassing predicament was causing me *more* stress and embarrassment, (those fabulous vicious cycles) so I told myself I *needed* to handle it asap. Also, I called around, spoke to the stylist I'd chosen, explained my issue and how embarrassed I was. When I got there ALL the stylists were so kind and understanding - they took me in a special little area so I didn't feel 'as' awkward. Now, not all salons may be as understanding, but sometimes we just have to say *SO WHAT?* You know - it *only* took 2 hours to repair the predicament I'd been living with for *months* and I never had to see those people again (tho I do, as this is now my salon). I felt so much better once it was done - one less thing to be anxious and angry at myself over, you know? As a bonus present to myself, I had them do my makeup, so when I left the salon I felt like a million dollars!!💃 I was so happy and proud of myself!💪💅 I know it's been over a week since you posted this, but I'm interested to know if you've resolved your situation and how? Take care, sweetie!!✌️
@@secretTarg you responded to someone else but I have a question for you….so I just got a huge tangle out of my hair myself last month. I think I should have gone somewhere because it turns out I was not gentle and ripped out a lot of hair. Now my ponytail looks really sad…just curious when you went to a salon if you lost a lot of hair (NOT for the next time I do this, because you know, there won’t be a next time. Hopefully. Fingers crossed.) I’m thinking I should get a short haircut but I don’t really want to…anyway, thanks for any input!
@@chigurl4667 It’s normal to lose a lot of hair when removing a large tangle/matting. Hair falls out naturally and sheds, so a large amount of that shedding would have been stuck in the matting, which comes out when removed. I wouldn’t worry too much about it, but if it is something that is worrying you, I would recommend going to a professional and asking for advice!
I just popped on here after spending 2 hours detangling the front of my natural 4c hair after a 3 month depressive episode. You’re doing a very good job. May God bless you and be there for you as you have been there for them❤️
I'm happy that you were able to detangle your hair! Wishing you the best 💜
I wish you all the best as well. It's not easy but I hope we'll be okay!
omg i am wishing you love
Sending love 💘
Proud of you, wish u the best
My partner was never taught how to care for his very textured/curly hair, and he has ended up with matting like this. It’s very very nice to see someone taking care of a client without shaming them.
The hairdresser has the patience of a saint. She made this clients hair so gorgeous.i can't believe what a miracle she pulled off. I'd like to have her do my hair too and get to meet her
She's great. Best makeover I've ever seen. I absolutely am awed.
Nobody knows where my husband got his beautiful curls from, we don't know his paternal family. It breaks my heart the effort he put on the years I helped him learn to care for his hair. He would get it matted and it was just so dry too.
@@elenapic6859 he needs to search for mixed race people hair tutorial, to educate himself on the subjet, it will be a life safer for the both of you.
Had a time where my hair was matted real bad for a similar reason. I'm the only person in my family with curly hair (3a) and there wasn't many people in my area with a similar hair type (most people's hair is straight or has a very slight wave). I figured out that keeping my hair shorter has helped and it has taken me years to figure out how to properly handle my hair (and even to this day I'm still learning).
When I was in the hospital, my nurse spent hours unmatting my hair for me, she put it in platts so it wouldn't get matted during the rest of my stay. I don't think many people realize how much of a difference this makes to someone struggling.
I love that you told her you were proud of her. She wasn't kidding when she said addicts don't hear it often.
I have had multiple clients through the years walk in needing help with their knots. This is more common than people realize and it’s okay to ask for help!! I was more than happy to sit and help someone get rid of their knots. It’s okay, we all go through things. 💞
Could you please give me product recommendations my MIL is bedbound and here hair is severely matted, I'm desperate to help but haven't found the correct products that will help x
I love how she calls all her clients beautiful. It makes me feel pretty and I’m literally not even there and my hair is fine. She’s so sweet though I can’t
Because her favorite working with hair.
Everyone is beautiful. Thin hair is just as lovely as hair with an average thickness or thick hair. No hair is beautiful too.
I sat here and cried right along with her. I've had my own journey of depression and low self esteem. I am so proud of you for the journey you've taken.
I remember when I was about 11/12 ish my hair was extremely matted. I was getting rejected at hair salons to fix it. Not as bad as this, but still pretty bad. I was getting bullied at school at the time and was pretty depressed. My friends at the times grandma, helped me get the hair untangled and got it to be pretty normal after everything...So grateful for her at that time.
This gives "hair therapy" a new meaning.! All that pain gone just like that ball of hair. What a blessing for both ladies.
Last year I went through a really bad depressive time for a few months and I never washed or brushed my super long curly hair. You can imagine how tangled that would get in just a day. But I always wore it in a bun on top of my head so it was out of my face. I left it there for months never taking it down and brushing it out. You can imagine where this is going. So in October, I decided to finally try detangling it bc my birthday was coming up (and then my wedding in November). I struggled so much I broke down and cried and my husband (fiancé at the time) came in and tried to brush it out but he ended up making it so much worse, and made it extremely tight on my scalp, it was so so painful. So for the next 2 weeks, my mom tried to detangle it for hours every single day until finally I went to a salon where they loosened it from my scalp, which revealed how much damage was actually done. I was bald all on the sides and back of my head. I was absolutely devastated bc I wanted to wear my natural curls for my wedding day. I went into the salon again the next day and told them to just shave everything off bc there literally was nothing to save. Hardly anything on top to cover the baldness it was just so so bad. I really thought I was going to leave the salon a wreck bc I didn’t have any hair anymore. But really I felt liberated. I felt so free. Not just from the weight of all the hair hanging off my scalp, but from the emotional baggage that it also carried. The stylists were so so kind and sympathetic and one of them even helped me get a wig and style it for my wedding the next month. My hair has grown out quite a bit since and my curls are coming back slowly but surely. I’ll always be grateful to those stylists who brought me in with no judgment or questions. They saved me.
God bless you girl, I’m glad you’re doing better now🥺
Bless your heart luv 🥹💝
👍👍👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏
You made me cry. When I was about twelve, I started doing hair around the neighborhood. You reminded me of a young girl whose hair I cleaned up. She had lice so bad and her hair was so matted everyone thought it was short. She cleaned up so good. I was so proud and her hair was silky like this lady's hair when qe finished. You are a beautiful soul❤
I recently started going to cosmetology school but still didnt know what my passion was. Through watching your videos, I now know what i want to do with my license when i get it.
Good luck!!😘
I can’t believe someone actually helps people with this for a living. How freaking cool. As a Caucasian autistic person with extremely long and thick hair that I struggle to maintain, my hair mats on a regular basis. I ended up switching to ACV and baking soda with in between honey/oil/egg masks years ago and that’s honestly been the best thing for my hair. Even when I go for long periods of time without brushing/washing due to burnout/depression, it still detangles and demats a lot easier. This is SO COOL that you help people with this, saving their hair. My hair was part of my identity (still is lol) and I’m sure MANY people feel this way. Thank you for all you do!!!!
Edit: wow it looks AMAZING when it’s complete!! That girl must’ve cried for days with gratitude!!
Girl, I've been using baking soda and apple cider vinegar in my hair for the last month and a half. Night and day difference. I'm never buying shampoo and conditioner again for as long as I live. After I get out of the shower I slap some organic cold pressed olive oil mixed with some of my favorite essential oils for hair health/growth like rosemary for example. So amazing. My hair feels so light and clean and always smells good and always shiny. Even my scalp feels airy and healthy.
Yes! I've started adding oils to my routine too. I always use an intense leave-in treatment too. I've had bouts of illness recently plus a very busy work schedule. I smother my hair in it. Even without weeks of washing, the mats come out super easy!
@@PurplePinkRed do you smother your hair with oils or the intense leave in conditioner ?
@@TheRealSmokahontas, j'utilise le citron et le bicarbonate de soude pour mes dents mais je n'aurais jamais penser que c'était bon pour les cheveux, même si je me fais des rinçages au citron et au miel..
J'utilise aussi de la farine de seigle, comme shampooing, me fais des masques avec des décoctions de graines de lin noir, ou de flocons d'avoine et de poudre de guimauve.. Ils sont aussi tres bons pour la peau. Je vais tester le romarin, même si mes cheveux poussent vite, j'adore l'odeur de cette plante et toutes ses propriétés... Merci pour vos bons conseils... ❤❤❤❤🇨🇵
I haven’t tried this but I was wondering if you put lemon essential oil with Basil if that would work, I’m sure the fragrance would be very fresh.
Taking care of someone’s hair is such a pure act of love and kindness. I spend hours removing burrs and mats from my favorite horse’s hair when I visit him and he always seems so grateful. Thank you for helping this woman in such a compassionate way!
It can be such a spiritual and emotional thing to do your own or someone you love's hair. I guarantee your horse feels that love
😲 WOW!! THAT WAS AMAZING!!! What a transformation you save that girl's hair I cannot believe it!!!
When it takes literally all your energy to get through your day, it's hard to do those things to take care of yourself. When I was at my lowest, my husband would have to help me undress and lead me to the shower because just the thought of taking a shower was exhausting.
I am so proud of this young woman for taking her life back and getting the help she needed. What a transformation! Thank you for your compassion and empathy for all of your clients!
God bless your husband for helping you, I remember going weeks without showering because I felt the same exact way and my boyfriend would just judge me and tell me how he showers everyday and it’s not that hard to just go shower that I looked a mess and it broke me honestly
I have had depression my whole life. I was the same at one point, a functioning addict. I'm 33 with 3 kids and I still struggle to see any value in myself, and I struggle with self care. I'm years clean but still, it's hard. I'm so happy for her that she is better in herself ♡ I hope to get to that point too.
Your value is your children. They need their mother whole. Raise them in the way they should go. They will be there for you.
🫂 I wish I could take those feelings away. Until I know otherwise, I see no reason why should battle it daily. Keep kicking butt. ✊🏾
I'll pray for you recovery
You are enough, you are worthy.🥰
I can't imagine how much that must have hurt to have that entire ball of hair pulling on that small section of hair.
Her hair looks gorgeous! Amazing work as always ❤️
Using this video to help a friend who's gonna help someone untangle their hair . Love the uplifting talk .good job
I’ll be honest. At first look at the title I began to ponder why someone couldn’t brush their hair for so long but as I watched and her story got explained it dawned on me how quick it is to judge another person without knowing them…
I’m struggling with not so much addiction but I can heavily relate to depression and how hard it is to take care of yourself let alone do anything else. I’m sorry to initially judge and it’s so awesome to see the transformation. Please keep doing what you’re doing!
if you go even a few days without brushing this can happen. then the mat sets in and there's nothing you can do.
@@reidleblanc3140 yeah. :(
I lost nearly all my teen years and my adult years to depression, seeing how lovely, kind and compassionate you are just makes my heart happy. Your compassion will encourage people. Subscribed to you.
I spent 2 days helping my friend detangle her 11 year old daughter’s heavily matted hair (more than this). I could tell they were both so embarrassed. I made sure to not pass any judgement and joked and laughed and had as much fun as we could, letting her play with all my apps on my phone like Snapchat. Her daughter was in tears thinking she had to cut it super short (it was so long) and once I started I gave her hope. We didn’t have to cut it! I taught them how to deal with and care for easily tangled hair, gave them a detangle comb and tried to empower them for the future as much as possible. Ish happens. We all need more kindness. Love this ❤️
Can you please tell me how to manage easily tangled hair my hair is the the same way !
@@pandurr6283 After you brush it, put it in a low braid. Rarely wear hair loose. When you shampoo your hair and rinse it out, you can put around 2 tablespoons of Braggs Apple Cider Vinegar in a gallon of water and rinse your hair with it again. Just pour on top of your head. Make sure your eyes are closed. Apply conditioner afterwards. When you get out of the shower apply organic extra virgin coconut oil all over your strands. Let it air dry. Use a wet brush or wooden brush and put in low braid. Done. Only do the ACV method every 3 months.
@@AmyLeeAngelLove Tyvm for posting that as I'm in a similar bind and am inches away from chopping it off myself. It's been forever since I've gotten it this long though and really want to save it if I can.
Can you please tell me how the ACV and coconut oil helps?
I have two matted areas on the back fairly close to my scalp. After my Mom passed suddenly a year ago, I just stopped washing my hair being so depressed. After four months I lazily and quite foolishly decided I just wouldn't wash or comb my hair until the one year anniversary, as a dedication to her. She'd be laughing at me now, lol.
Ty again. Peace.
@@amyjoyce2301 I am so sorry about your mother. Depression can take over our lives. The same thing happened to me and I was left with my hair being severely matted. Make sure you do not wash your hair when the strands are knotted together. You can set the knots and could make it impossible to remove. This is what I did. Put a good movie, show, or long UA-cam video on. Get really comfortable. Soak your matted hair in coconut oil (an entire bottle of Vo5 conditioner may help too). Take a metal rat tail comb (long piece is metal, comb is plastic) and start picking away at the knots with the metal piece. Make sure you start at the very end. Do it very gently so your hair doesn't break. Use your fingers too when you start to see the hairs coming apart. So it's not so overwhelming, I would just do one matted area one day and the the other the next day. Once you are able to remove every single knot, wash hair with Vo5 shampoo (my favorite). If your hair is prone to tangles, you can use up to 3 tablespoons of ACV in 1 gallon of water. ACV cleanses the scalp, softens the strands (less knots), and makes your hair very shiny. After you do a ACV rinse, slather your mane in Vo5 conditioner. Leave it in for 10 minutes... rinse. When your hair is still wet, apply organic extra virgin coconut oil. Coconut oil makes hair easier to brush without causing breakage. Any knot you may have becomes easier to untangle. Wait until your hair is 100% dry before using a wet brush or wooden brush/comb. Put in low braid if your hair is long. These are my favorite hair ties that prevent split ends and breakage... and they STRETCH.
www.amazon.com/gp/product/B07WNG7TT8/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_search_asin_title?ie=UTF8&th=1
Every time you want to treat your hair, you can do an ACV rinse but make sure it's not too often... once every 1-3 months, use 100% flaxseed gel and wash out afterwards (you can find out how to make from any UA-cam video), and steam your hair. You can find a hair steamer on Amazon. These methods will prevent knots, take out knots, prevent breakage, prevent dryness, and make hair very soft. Don't forget to always use 100% organic coconut oil on wet hair and never brush or comb hair until it's 100% dry. If you want hair to your hips or longer.. that's the way to go.
I hope you are able to solve your hair issue. If you have any more questions or concerns, feel free to let me know. 🙂
@@AmyLeeAngelLove Thanks so much! I made some mistakes from before you replied but so far had only gotten half way through one matted section (it took hours). For instance I had already washed my hair - four times! I also cut some out with a scissors in frustration. Better late than never to start correct though.
I do have a couple of questions about the advice for the future but I'll save them because I'd like to update you on the finish. Btw, it so happens I have ACV and the best coconut oil in the house already, which I use for cooking. I use Pantene conditioner but will try Vo5. Ty again for taking the time. I parted my hair on the side and separated the healthy from the matted, braiding it. Both have inspired me!
I’ve been a stylist for 30 years and I have seen a lot. There are not too many people like you out there and I just wanted to say thank you. For doin what you do and just being you ❤.
i'm SO proud of this woman!! getting out of addiction is such a hard battle n i'm so grateful you are able to help her feel better about herself. she is a strong amazing woman n i hope that this is a reminder of how much she has overcome.
I can’t imagine living with that for 3 years. It had to hurt and I bet she had a terrible time trying to get comfortable at night. Glad she’s all fixed up now!
when everyone around you seems to be perfectly groomed, hair brushed and done, no dandruff or knots, you really do feel like the only one
When I wrote this comment, my hair looked like this. Glad to say now my hair is a lot healthier. I cut it off, its a lot more manageable, with shoulder length still. Im happy. Getting my hair combed out was helpful in getting me through this depression. Im still struggling and just suffered a tragic loss but seeing this comment and where I've come in 6 months was really nice
@@cod410 I'm glad you can see all the progress you've made 💜 Keep on keepin on
i'm 19 and currently struggling mentally, i have finally gotten the will to brush my hair, though the matting isnt as bad as hers, its still painful and irritating, this is really helping me feel less alone, thank you.
I've got several disabilities, and especially headaches, and not only do I understand how this happens, but I can't imagine how painful that large mat must have been. I'm so glad you're bringing light to this and helping people.
Same! I have shaved my hair before because it was REALLY long and got matted after a very unfortunate incident involving my chronic illnesses where I, well, I don't know, bc I was not conscious of anything. I had shaved it, in many styles, as a college student, but this time it was literally just because I couldn't work out the thick mats due to my pain and intense migraines. I'm currently trying to find a way to get these mats out without shaving it, which is why I searched for videos like this. Being bed-ridden with so many health issues just sucks bc I just cannot do things for long, extended periods sometimes, including dealing with my hair. 😔
@@killerlalu1 that's so relatable.. because of my disability I can barely keep my arms and hands up long enough to brush my hair for a few minutes daily... know if I missed a day I'd end up like that in an instant. shit's hard... hope you can save your hair.
I remember having hair like this when I was 15, just starting highschool. I remember I thought I was just lazy, but in retrospect I was in a terrible state for a couple years after my little sister died, and she died just before I started highschool. I couldn’t do anything, I didn’t bother with grades, schoolwork, healthy eating, body care, nothing. I didn’t even feel bad, I just felt nothing. I didn’t care what anyone thought, I was in my own world of nothingness. My hair had 2 sizable mats, and we just ended up cutting the mats out and giving me a bob.
@Mo Chann
Thank you so so much for posting this 💗
I have a very similar situation and I thought I was going crazy.
My hair is horrible right now, it's matted like it never has done before.
I have friends and family around me that don't understand HOW I could allow it to happen.
Well, it's a very long story... I'm STILL trying to recover from losing 4 of my family members within 6 years, a broken wrist and constant migraines (which is actually how the tangles all started).
If I say to anyone that I've been terribly depressed/, seems like no one understands.
I'm like you, I'm where I don't care what anyone thinks.... this is a very devastating place to be.
I just wish I could find someone to help me with these tangles.
This happened once before and I finally went to a beatty shop, the lady almost pulled my hair out by trying to detangle from top to bottom on my very long hair. I KNOW that's not how you do it, I've had long hair a long time. I paid her $80 by the time she finished in two days session. She was horrible, I'll never go to her again.
Anyway, I'm trying to untangle my hair this time by myself, I just can't afford that again.
@@bkc74445 I’m in the same exact position. For longest time, thought I was just lazy.. now I know it’s depression. Im successful hiding this from my family out of guilt. Ik if they see the state of my hair, they would shame me. This happen to me before 2 years ago, and I told myself I would never been in this position again.. but here I’m am. If you have any tips, please let me know it.
@@bkc74445 As someone who has had a lot of matting over the years due to depressive episodes, have you tried a wetbrush? It's the only thing that can get through my hair even if I brush it daily. But when I do have matting, it is so much less painful and painstaking. Figured I should at least put it out there!
@@probablypositivity8918 As someone who has this happen pretty often, I just rip it out until it’s detangled, I have hair that reaches my knees but because of my negligence it’s thinning, unhealthy and I have bald spots. My depression is so bad that you’d throw up if you heard how I live right now and I can’t bring myself to fix it. Trying to detangle my hair right now, seems impossible so I might give up.
@@diziax3335 Could cutting it some be helpful? Just to give you less to have to do? Hair care can take a lot of energy when you're depressed, even the basic stuff
Thank you for doing what you do!
The hair dressers saying she couldn't get a pixie cut and wouldn't work with her piss me off. She was ready to try something to help herself and they judged her and shut her down. They could've done an edgy undercut with a little shave at the base with fun razor cuts on the front. Something. Then recomend her to come back for the pixie cut in a few weeks when the hair has grown. Glad she found you.
I really feel for this girl and others but I can also understand why the hair dressers couldn't do it, it took 2 whole days and they have to be making money it's their job so they wouldn't be able to take any appointments other than her for two days so it would have been really expensive and time consuming maybe she couldn't afford to pay a stylist for two full days work and couldn't expect them to be out of pocket 2 days money. Everyone needs to earn so don't be so quick to judge the hairdressers either. I know somebody who was in this position due to depression irl and I also know lots of hairdressers including my sister and best friend and seen them both comb and condition this girls hair for days after they finished work and it was hard work and really time consuming, they done it on their own time and out of the kindness of their hearts because they couldn't have done it in the salon when they worked for commission and tips they wouldn't have been able to afford to so probably would have had to comb for a couple of hours and cut short which still would have cost alot so if somebody hadn't much money shaving was probably the best advice the hairdressers could give this girl.
Totally. When I heard that bit I was like 😩 because I totally could have done a cute funky cut that could be graduated to a pixie in a couple months or something. Or a micro bob. Those hairdressers are obviously not very good at being flexible with their craft. She deserved better. Still, great she went on to be able to keep her hair, since it's bringing her so much joy!
@@roisinmcguckin7479 *The comment wasn't suggesting they detangle the hair, actually. So it wouldn't take two days. I suggest you reread it, because they were suggesting an undercut that can turn into a pixie cut in a few weeks
@@prinxen1733 it wasn't long enough the knot would have had to be untangled first if it was just cut off it would have been to short at parts and wouldn't have had enough length on top even for a pixie. I read it perfectly fine thank you but we can have different opinions that's fine, I'm not about to argue over it.
Thank you for showing me how to get my little girl’s hair untangled. She hates hair brushed and would scream and cry and even the slightest tug. At the end of the summer, her hair was completely matted from swimming with it in a bun and falling asleep on it. All I wanted to do was untangle it and cut it for her. I yanked on her head and made her cry needlessly so many times until I found your videos. It didn’t even occur to me to use the pointy end of the comb. 🤦♀️ I still feel awful, but thanks to you, problem is solved and she is slowly learning to trust me with a brush. Thank you and thanks to all the women who let you post their stories.
Untangling spray helps (for kids), always used it on my girls, who had long hair.
@@jenniferdaulby5519 that was my first instinct as well. Unfortunately her hair was completely matted. Any product we put in it just created more gunk in the matted parts, and we tried all sorts of stuff…It really had to be done painstakingly, strand by strand like she does in the video…my only regret is not finding her videos sooner. In retrospect, I really had no idea what I was doing and was just pulling on my child’s head and causing her unnecessary pain…🤦♀️once I realized you start at the ends and work with the end of the comb, I felt like a complete dumdum.
@@meaculpa6984 I see what you mean. That's why it's informative to watch the expert on this channel. So, weirdly, relaxing seeing her do this. Best wishes from Australia 🇦🇺 ❤
You are washing and detangling that negativity right out of her hair! Dealing with this must've been awful for her, it's wonderful that people like you are willing to compassionately help.
The conversation she has with those people is probably so helpful and healing also.
@@reysquadron7820 I would bet money you're right
Thank you and all hairdressers that take the time to do this. I have a daughter with super thick hair and when she was younger, she lived with her dad. He sent her to me with a huge mat in her hair we went to the salon and they managed to fix it but it took that woman's whole shift to fix it. She was so nice about it too.
As someone who has battled drug addiction, depression, and anxiety, this video brought me to tears! Thank you for being such a beautiful soul and reaching out to people who need it. One person can change your entire life😊She looks amazing!
You are so loving. It’s not just the judgement free detangling, it’s the affirmations you deliver throughout the process. You are love.
I hope this woman goes home and plays with her hair for DAYS. Look! It goes in a pony, and a bun, and I can French braid it, and I can put flowers in it… just run those fingers through and feel beautiful
That haircut is so nice! I bet the therapy of talking to you is it’s own gift too. The weight of her past is gone and she looks like someone new
I just love what you do. I’ve been dealing with bipolar depression for 10 years now & it’s destroyed my teeth so I understand what this woman is feeling. I’m so glad people like you exist in this world. Your work breathes life back into your clients & they must feel so good walking out with a fresh start.
What happened to your teeth?
@@lorirogers9304 I assume they mean they didn't brush their teeth and the enamel rotted away. The same happened to me when I was just a little kid. It never grows back. If I ever don't brush at least 2x and floss super super well every single day, my whole mouth will instantly be full of cavities... not a fun time
@Lori Rogers sometimes you can either brush your teeth or take a shower not both. I would go weeks without brushing my teeth, showering, or washing my hair. I could only do one maybe two self-care routines
hello fellow bean. I am the same. I used to be somewhat good looking too... had attractive gf's and was the host at a couple restaurants I worked at. It's crazy what I've become lol
Currently trying to get the mats out of my hair after a long depressive episode. You are an angel for doing this for people. It is so embarrassing to let hair get like this. It’s impossible for me to even ask for help. Thank you for being kind and understanding to people!
I saw another girl with the same problem posted that she used vegetable oil and it worked.
As a dog groomer, and a cosmetologis this is frustrating to watch because we have a specific tool that may make this so much faster. Splitting the hair with scissors with the growth of the hair and a Matt breaker tool. Bless you for doing this for her
Her hair looks SO GOOD when you're done! She must have felt SO MUCH better!
I might cry! That was such a big knot and the way you trimmed her hair of the broken hair and broke back her natural waves.... I'm speechless. It feels like I'm witnessing this woman's first day of the rest of her life
As someone who suffers from depression, anxiety etc and is getting training to become a hairdresser, I kinda want to do stuff like this.
Do it there's a big need for it!
I have been trying to find someone to help me with my hair, and have been unable to find anyone who is willing to do anything but cut it all off.
I so appreciate what this woman at this channel is doing, and hopefully you can become as gifted as she is in truly helping people ❤.
I'm in the same boat. I am SO thankful that I haven't had to go through the pain of matted hair. You would be doing such a beautiful thing
That would be amazing doing compassionate hair styling, some people are embarrassed by their hair or lack of hair. I don't how many people need detangling/matted hair treatments but other things are embarrassed by I have instead very dry scalp I actually seen this Japanese asmr video of scalp cleaning didn't know there are professional scalp cleaners. Then are thinning hair/balding. And skin conditions so think would be great have more compassionate hair stylist
You got this all the best
Wow. Thank you for admitting that. Your story is EXACTLY like my wife and I, minus the child. She has almost the exact same sort of knot on the back of her head and now that we are clean and she is on depression meds it is still weighing her down, both physically and emotionally. It's gotten to the point where she is willing to completely shave her head just so that she can move on. So, thank you. Both of you. So glad this video in particular exists!
I developed a large matt in my hair (a lot smaller than this one though) when I became bed-ridden for almost a month from severe food poisoning that turned into a bad intestinal infection. I was in so much agony that it didn't even cross my mind to brush my hair. I finally recovered, but now I had this matt in my hair. I attempted to cover it up for about a month or two, but it was still visible. I finally bit the bullet and spent a whole day detangling it myself, using a pair of scissors to cut away what I couldn't brush out. Thank you for sharing other people's similar stories - it's made me feel less alone!
Immediately she tells her how proud she is of her client and then acknowledged that her coming to get her hair done was an accomplishment.
Sometimes, just recognition and affirmation of little steps as being big accomplishments can mean so much. 🥰
Love what you're doing! 💗
I love that you talk about her struggles in a positive way, focusing on the accomplishments she's made, no matter how small. Having clean hair again definitely gave her some of her dignity back. You're able to walk around with your head a little higher.
This channel has opened my eyes to this by product of depression and addiction. WOW. This hairdresser is a saint!
What an amazing lady, who has gone through so much and is coming back so strong. Her openness in the chair feels like a wonderful shifting of weight - leaving behind darker times as well as the tangles. You provide a wonderful service x
I love how you treat your clients with such respect and dignity. Her hair was stunning after. I’m so glad you were able to help her and everyone else you help.
Your patience is straight up SAINTLY. Seriously! I get frustrated when my weaving gets a little tangled, or when my crochet gets tangled, and those have significantly fewer strands involved!! Major props to you for this!
why is there not more about this on the internet? I have detangled my own hair myself at from worse points than this, but there is nothing on the internet about this happening thank you for doing what you do, these videos have been the only reference I have to this happening to others and it has been a source of strength.
Nearly cried at the end when you revealed her gorgeous haircut. I can't Imagine how good that must feel after dealing with all that
It's not the weight of the hair that is the touching part here, it's the weight off her soul that the hair represented. I'm just going to call it LOVE, you are doing the Lord's work with what you do. Congratulations to her for all the work she has done and the success coming her way.
Hi how are you. Greetings from California, Great video. Hope you’re safe from covid. Have a good week and stay safe 😃😘 Franklin
I remember when I was pregnant for my daughter the father left me and I was alone for 7 months of torture throwing up EVERY single day I had a really tough pregnancy to the point I could barely shower and brush my hair regularly so I got a matte in the back and after I gave birth my sister took me to get rid of the matte and I'm so grateful to that stylist she saved my hair and the first time I ran my fingers thru it I cried it felt so good, my daughter is 6 now but I'll never forget that hair matte that literally took up most of my thoughts it was so controlling something as minor as having matted hair, so I can imagine the relief and freedom she felt after that, I was swinging my hair for days after that lol
As a fellow stoner I’m so happy you are doin better now. Dad is probably better off without you. Definitely wouldn’t want you in that relationship!
Madame Hair Stylist and Human Saver, you are truly a Kindness Warrior. Getting folks who are in a place where they're unable to do the things to make them whole again back to level or thriving really takes a team of people who specialize in what they specialize in. You are just amazing.