Patient gets STABBED 9 times
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- Опубліковано 28 вер 2023
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He seems more pissed off that they broke the bar fight code then actually being stabbed.
You aren't wrong! 😂
Yeah! He stabbed me! 😮
I would be too. Dirty fighter
To be fair. I’m on his side😂😂😂😂
What bars do y'all go to that people fight fair... getting stabbed is the low end of my expectation. But I'm from the south and you can get shot over a swing at the park, so what do I know.
'You thought you were fighting fair ... in a bar fight" just kills me😆
.... words... It's almost as though... Words mean.... things.... b- b- bar f- f- f- fight
Say it with us Mr Nine Times, "Bar Fight" 😅
Why, I would assume that too
@@skyerobinson4148 a gentlemen's fight even if it is betwixt women or even trans or enby folx these days, has, at a minimum, rules that are agreed prior to, sometimes they're sponsored, people may formally wager, etc.
A bar fight has no fcukin rules. It could spread like honey on hot toast and 3, 5, fifteen, fifty, 150 people could have been arrested, depending on the circumstances. A lil teeny 2man squabble forgotten before the pizzza arrives is indeed vastly preferable to a Superbowl Sunday Shootout at the HOKAY. Ze Werld iz ern Firre. Arena
a contagion of preemie killing nurses in a NICU with a handsome prenatal heart surgeon
@@skyerobinson4148 We are naive, good people...who forget that sociopaths, psychopaths, and malignant narcissists ENJOY hurting other people...for fun. They believe "fair" is for suckers and idiots.
@@skyerobinson4148- not in this day and age.
That patient was doing a really good job matching the vibe and giving you something to go off on
Steven didn’t even make any jokes the thing was just funny on it’s own lol
@@TheDirtysouthfan His questioning and small lines make the story even funnier
When he said "Ontario" I thought Steven was just going to pass him the mic
It's funny you calling him the patient like he was Steve's patient lol
Dude, now WE’RE all witnesses too, what have you done
FUGG!
😂😂😂
We're all gonna bring knives to that bar at Ontario and Madison, that's what!
Well, we can't _all_ go to jail
Albany 😂. Sounds about right
When he said "I'll get them" I was half expecting him to announce that he found the assailant and he's at the show and WE'RE ALL about to fight
That'll be like a movie where all the patrons standing behind the 9 stabs guy handing him things from inside the show to beat down the other dude. I'd watch that movie. 🤣
@@runfastlady6395 I would love to watch that movie lol
And the man in the back said everyone attack and it turned into a ballroom blitz...
“Wait! I don’t know the adequate! What do you bring to a comedy club fight?”
“You’re wit!” *cue joke about a knife named cutting wit*
This really sounds like a 50cent backwoods country version 😅
I like how he was ready to give the name of the guy that stabbed him, but not the doctor.
Ain’t no snitching on the stitching.
I love you can tell at the beginning he was about to say his usual "Was it an emergency?" line then realised that question was definitely redundant!
Lol I think he was also wondering if he wanted to touch that…
I love that his only gripe is the other guy cheated 😂
Anybody who's already survived being stabbed 9 times and is attending a performance at a comedy club is probably going to be as hard to kill as Rasputin
Ontario and Madison. Note to self: DO NOT PUT ON BUCKET LIST🤣🤣🤣
Agreed! To hell with that noise...
My thought.
They just killed Ontario's tourism
Madison is a wild place even for me and my husband being from NJ. We moved to WI and 16 days later we left! Didn’t like WI at all the people were not friendly at all, we got scammed from our landlord who was my sim’s brother, but a real scumbag along his wife. We couldn’t get out of there fast enough! So glad we left! An unfriendly place. We were right outside . The something. Where people go to visit. The ridge , no that’s not it. But didn’t matter we left asap. The dells. It was closed when we were there so no idea what the hoopla was all about. We lived about 10 minutes from the dells in a small town that had the most rude, unfriendly people and we had lived in NJ and NC for years and thought people were bad in ncwhich I’d where we left due to them not liking ‘😴Yankees, and went into a worse area that hated outsiders! My kids had trouble in school because they talked ‘funny’ according to the Kids & people/ kids in school!! I had gone ahead of my husband aand he foo after he stoyhis job. When he arrived! Told him don’t unpack, Im NOT stay ing in this hellhole and after he was there 2 days he said, oaiup the few things you did unpack, we’re going back and getting the hell out of here. Guess we had a vacation with tthe furniture! But We’re never taking the furniture on vacation again! It’s been a family joke ever since! We always joke should we take the furniture when we go on vacation or what furniture should we take?! But wi was nasty, or the people were! Had a friend move there years later and she moved out in less than a year too, same reasons! People were not friendly or welcoming at all! And I thought NC was bad, wrong! Nc their just prejudice wi folks didn’t like anyone’s who wasn’t born there , which is such bullshit! And so stupid &ignorant imo!
Yet he went to Albany Med 😅
No, now everyone is curious about this bar...on Ontario and Madison! I'm dying from laughter... need oxygen...yes, it's an EMERGENCY. 🤣🤣🤣
"Where did you get stabbed?" "Ontario".😂
The only fair fight is the one in a boxing ring
-My Dad
Do you remember why? Talking back possibly? Lol
@@runfastlady6395 My father's father, my grandfather was in the Navy and was an amateur welterweight boxer... and according to my dad was one of the dirtiest fighters he knew... out of the ring
Until Mike Tyson bit off an ear?
You dad was naive, I'm sorry to say. Fights have been fixed for a long time. The blows are the real deal, but one fighter knows he's going to flop and go home with a big paycheck.
@@le_th_ Sometimes, looking historically at the whole sport, is someone taking a dive? Yes. The Mafia was often trying to muscle in, pay fighters off, intimidate managers, etc for gambling purposes.
But in general, many if not most bouts are very visibly not rigged. If you understand boxing, it's visible.
It's not like WWE.
Now everyone who saw this video is a witness
Fr!! We all Google Earth location to see the bar establishment up close🤣🤣
Case is closed...🫢
The guy gave a perfect story for a future patient skit.
he is the classic patient who says a lot
Correction: says a lot without saying anything at all 😂
I've never seen the comedian turn into the audience and the audience turn into a comedian. :)
Every once in a while you see this...but the difference today is that we can pull it up anytime we want on UA-cam. It used to be you only rarely got to see this if a skit was recorded and put on HBO (and you had cable) or if you got lucky and were at the Comedy Store on the right night to see it occur.
@jamieb4687 - Now you have.
I love it when the audience just jumps into the comedy act. Funny stuff.
I like how it wasnt just typical crowdwork, like the crowd was making it even funnier
Crowd work really isn’t predictable! 😅😂
…and then there was the time when the doctor, (back in the day when you contacted a base hospital to get orders from the ERP because we didn’t have standing orders and protocols) wanted to know where the patient had been shot and and the paramedic replied “IN THE GARAGE!!! This is a true story.
Who doesn't like to play "Clue" in the ER? "The victim was stabbed with a dagger, in the dining room and in the bladder".....
🤣🤣😂those were the best days🤣🤣😂always loved when the red phone rang. It meant the fun was about to begin!
Reminds of the Eddie Murphy bit where he's talking to a guy who was hit by a bus, and he asked, "Where?" and the guy shouted out, "On Broadway!" when Eddie was asking for the injury location.
@@jhdix6731 Curse you, Colonel Mustard!
I was astounded by how many times the stabbed audience guy failed to understand the assignment.....
But it did add funny content.
Maybe he did it on purpose? 😂
Well, he did get stabbed in the head ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Or just enjoying the 2+ drink minimum!
He has been stabbed in the head. And thought fighting in a bar was a regulated sport.
@@M_SCTo be fair to him, I don't think it's unreasonable to assume that the other person is not going to whip out a weapon because having a fistfight is perfectly legal. It's when weapons come out or one person gains a clear upper hand and doesn't stop that the fight becomes illegal. I just don't understand how someone could get so mad at a total stranger in a bar that they'd risk spending the rest of their life in prison over it.
The look 💀
"Stop saying names!" I lost it. 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂
“An enemy? A friend? Your mom? “ yep, my mom is always stabbing me in the back.
This guy has been DYING to tell this story again.
Can't say I ever had a stabbing in the bar that I worked in as a bouncer!! That was a long time ago, though. 23 years ago!
Which bar? Ontario and Madison?
@@rat_dragon It's stabless no more
In Albany....🫣
Thank you for all the laughs! I had a seizure (first and hopefully only) last Monday and stopped breathing. Do not remember anything other than the 2 nurses saying I was faking it, then woke up the next day incubated in ICU! Spent 6 days in the hospital. Grateful to be alive!!! :)
Best wishes to you
Good grief, those were some crappy nurses to assume you were faking! Glad you're alive, and I hope they figure out what happened!
@@kateshiningdeer3334 First seizure (hopefully last) due to high BP. I am better now! :)
@@annarend7056 Thank you Anna!
I'm also grateful that you are alive. I hope you can get your BP under control so you don't go through that again.
I recently had a scary situation where my heart rate went down to 38. I had to call an ambulance for myself. I was only there overnight but couldn't get out of there fast enough the next day. I've never had such a horrible experience in the hospital. It's terrible when the people who are supposed to care for you have an agenda that includes mistreatment & there's nothing you can do about it.
Be well!
This person's brain is why he became a patient with 9 stab wounds.
The guy saying where (geographically) he got stabbed made me think of the Eddie Murphy "Hit By A Car" routine where the guy says "on BroadWAY" XD
Attorney was examining the doctor. He says, "So the victim was shot in the forest?", and the doctor says, "No; I said he was shot in the lumbar region".
Attorney is examining the victim. He says, "So are we to understand you were stabbed in the fracas?", and the victim says, "No; I was stabbed between the belly button and the fracas".
Only answer the question asked. Don't give anymore information than necessary. Just like in court. 😊 Then he suggested a bar to go to after the show. This way he has help to get the guy who stabbed him. 😂
That look said " what did u do to be stabbed NINE times?"
I’m so proud of Stevieoie. He is living his dream!!!!!!!!
If you ever find yourself in a fair fight, your tactics suck. And I say that as someone that could not fight their way out of a wet paper bag.
LOL
He should have watched John Wick movies and thought to bring a pencil with him before leaving the house. That'd be a reasonable fight...🤣
Can confirm Albany Med....exists lol. Kidding aside, it actually is a very good hospital
I think my sister was a nurse there. Could be wrong😮
“that’s albany”
can confirm
Manitoba has a nickname. It's Stabitoba. There's also some VERY bad places in Chicago and now Portland, Oregon has legalized drugs- like all kinds! So now they complain about the MASS homeless issues. Well Portland, that was YOUR choice! Deal with it!
Albany, New York. Not Canada....
Lesson learned
Don't ever go to that bar 😭
Oh no. You're a witness now. Lol
Sounds like you're going to be a future witness too, Steve!!! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖
Dude giving away location. Yeah, we ALL are witnesses. I'd use everything in the bar too to defend myself.
Give that guy in the audience his own show, he's funny as hell
I got stabbed by iv's 7xs...I was sent to a unit to find a vein and than taken back to the triage room😂🤣😂🤣😂!! After 30 mins in the triage I was taken to a room & then 5 hours later admitted to the hospital😂🤣😂🤣😂
Bro they should've IO'd you.
BRO DRINK SOME WATER ALREADY
@@24YOAOoooooh, NOOOO!! PICC or direct Central line; no IOs!!!! It gives even half-conscious patients PTSD for life!😱😱😱
EDIT: If I were in the CCU, and the ED couldn't find a vein, then they called me. I could find a vein in the most obese and/or dehydrated patients.
@@2manybooks2littletime25 If my paramedic misses the IV more than 3 times he pulls out the drill 💀
Some people just have invisible veins
@@24YOA I'm well aware of invisible veins. In a hospital critical care or ED, we'd place a central line in. Paramedics out in the field can't do that, at least not in my state. So, intraosseous line placement is your go-to. I have much respect for paramedics; you do whatever is necessary out of hospital with only so much equipment. I saw a future paramedic getting an IO just so he knew how it felt. I'd never heard a man scream so much!!😄😳 I thanked God that we didn't do that in hospital!!
The hippa is strong with this one
Omg yes. He’s funny I’m very glad he took up comedy 🙌
This story is a really good example of the old military adage that looking for a"fair fight" is looking to be killed.
He's so proud of himself..."I got stabbed 9!!! times!"
On the plus side, if you’re going to get stabbed, getting stabbed practically next door to a hospital is the most convenient place
Well, when you've been stabbed nine times, I would think it's safe to say it definitely IS an emergency.
Love me some steveio!! Hilarious 😂❤
Of course it was in Ontario 😂😂
No. Ontario was the street. It's Albany, New York not Canada...
😂🤣😭 WHAT AN EXPERIENCE 🙄🤨🧐😂🤣😭 Oh Steve 😯😳 you handled this "Too much info" all too well. How much had this guy had to drink? 🍻🥃 An image embedded in your memory forever 😂🤣😭😯😳
I'd love to go to one of these shows man
Stevio had his work done for him that night. Really funny stuff.
I love how this guy made you laugh 😅
Tryna make you a witness lmao
Had to dry my tears, i laughed so hard!
i feel like that’s forever an inside joke now
"STOP SAYING NAMES" LOOOOOOL
My dad has a story of how in high school this dude wanted to fight him (forget why) and they went out back and my dad found some old shitty baseball bat and the guy was like "Uuuuuuuuh, I thought we were gonna fight" and my dad (who was smaller than this dude) was like "No man, we're out in an alley wtf are you talking about fighting fair?" so this dude got all nervous and demanded they go to an actual freaking boxing place with gloves and shit, where they put on all the gear and my dad managed to hold his own until deciding the whole thing was stupid and just finally went, "I'm done, I'm leaving." and just left. 😂
I can't stop laughing. I am crying from laughing so hard and so much.
Me what the hell did you do to GET stabbed! 9 times!
bro this is so funny
78 staples? That wasn't a doctor, it was Tim Taylor playing with the Binford Staple-O-Matic 12000.
I love the crowd work ❤ you are so funny!
Imagine being so privileged you think that you could be an accessory just from that conversation
Really glad to see some content in video format. It's a real shame that UA-cam doesn't allow PC viewers to save shorts content to watch later from the main subscription feed any longer.
We can't save shorts on an Android phone or tablet but it does allow us to share. So, I share it to my email
so I can watch it later. Don't know if you can do this on a PC though.
I have an android (Samsung) and I can save shorts and videos to a playlist.
@@angelatruly I wish I could but both of my devices are old. Hopefully when it's time to get new ones I can do that.
I lovelovelove you!!!
You're soooo funny!!!
At least you know where not to go. 🤣🤣🤣
This kept getting better and better 🤣🤣
Those in the crowd simultaneously singing "head shoulders knees and toes with dude on stage yo.
Let me guess your all parents on a rare night out.
Mental note - cancel the Air B&B in Ontario and Madison 😂
Not Canada. Albany. New York...
@@KattMurrthat too haha
Typo
Doctor, help me! I got stabbed in the Ontario!!!!😂
Absolutely hilarious!🤣
This has me dying lolll
This is really a priceless clip!!
We need to teach the youth that honor is lost if the fight is unfair, someone uses any weapon besides fists, or fighting anyone who does not want to fight or has allready lost (is on ground or has given up). And that you go outside, in order not to lose your door privelige in that bar or club or worse, hurt others that are not part of it. Its not that hard. You want respect? Earn it!
What about... "Dont fight kids" ? 😭
@@akitokutikabanae7010that would be a very good thing to tell them first. Like nothing wrong with standing up for urself but also like dont make eye contact with the crazies.
💯
@@akitokutikabanae7010 True, and generally anyone who is visibly weaker then you, thats just - weak.
Oh as an afterthought: you meant: Don't fight at all? Yeah but we tried that, and now they all go nuts completly unhinged. Not everyone has the education or stability to steam of "healthy" a blue eye, broken nose lost teeth is a hundred times better then two destroyed two familiys with one knife: the killed kids faily, and the killers kids family. It's like trying to forbid drug use completly, just makes it worse. So let's say: Don't fight, it's stupid, but if you have to, follow the "rules".
@@catrice1296 Your last sentence is absolutely perfect, I agree 👌🏻
Holy bananas.... Thought ok, kinda funny... And then.... Where were u stabbed?, oh Ontario and..... I lost it. Haven't laughed that hard in a long time.
He is hilarious. 😂
guy seemed like he was planted in the audience for this routine
That guys good, you should hire him.
I guess that was an emergency 😆
Dude! You're so good!
22 times
With a steak knife
In the back
By my mom
While i was hugging her to apologize for an earlier argument.
(Lesson learned, don't trust a mentally ill person that's off their meds🥴🤷♂️)
Luckily, it wasn't as bad as it sounds and not even close to my worst injury🙂😵💫
🤣🤣🤣
I would love to see your show in person. You are so funny.
Albany Mayor just declared crime is going down in Albany, sigh.
I have a better ER story. I got kicked hard in the pubic bone by a horse. Let me tell you, the hematoma was epic and the pain made me hyperventilate. Also felt nauseous for a few minutes.
I wasn't expecting this to be so funny! Especially 1:02
When he asks ever been to the ER. I’ll ask which time? When he says the most serious. Again I’ll ask which time? The time you got operated on. Again which time.?? Lol 😂😂😂
You are funny as fugg 😂
Hands down the MOST Righteous reason to go to the ER! After watching, (I think All of his videos), the thousands of morons, Ill educated and whiny people who should never have come in is mind blowing! I developed a massive new Respect for the ER staff. Honestly I am not a good enough person. I’d hardly last until I snapped and told someone to GTFO. I sincerely believed the only people who ever went to the ER were Having a Stroke, Having a Heart Attack, Nearly Dead in a Car Wreck or some tragic accident that led to uncontrollable bleeding.I was born in 1960. No one ever went to the ER, they mostly sucked it up or called a Dr they knew. I did in fact have a Heart Attack months ago and nearly did not go to the ER because I didn’t want to bother them and a Heart Attack for a woman is nothing like for a man… you know the tv or movie where his left arm hurts and then he falls down saying it feels like an Elephant is on my chest. God Bless the super human patience of ER staff today! ❤👏🏻🙏🏻
I'm cracking up 😂😂😂
Funniest shit everrrr 😂😂😂😂
😅😂😅🤣😂☺️😂 OH, I gotta catch my breath....
"Ontario"
DED
Could there be a better audience member? Lol
That's what Chandler would have said. F.R.I.E.N.D.S.
@@runfastlady6395 no that would be... Could there BE a better audience member? 😆
Oh this was great!
Ontario and madison sounds like shuns kitchen time to pay a visit
"stabbed 9 times"
me: "is this fucking 50 Cent's cousin???"
Great now im a witness too!!
Don't ask those open ended questions!
But it made great comedy!
them bars got some mean mofos in them.