Just a lil supercut of all the Acolyte videos. Work continues on Rings of Power. I have tweaked the audio on it in my permanent quest to accidentally make it sound good. If anyone is masochistic enough to have seen the original and the supercut versions, lemme know if it’s any better.
Where's the Dune video? This series, and RoP for that matter, simply don't deserve even this amount of attention. I understand that the new popular thing gets the views, but you're Dune analysis is a superior quality of work using superior raw material.
@@Arko777777 That's one theory. Another is that HE IS MAULER before he began tampering with Eldritch magic & got transformed into the abomination that he is today... A welsh man. OH GOD THE HUMANITY!
Platoon: "The upload is now complete. When I left you I was but the Efapper, now I am the Longman." Mauler: "Only a Longman of (Compilation), Platoon."
Little Platoon, I work 12 hour shifts, where I need to respond to issues and generate reports and computer logs for them, but if nothing happens for a few minutes, the computer signs me out of Windows as a security measure, and then, when I have to make a new log entry, I have to sign in again. I recently discovered that if you leave a video playing in a browser window, that counts as activity, and will keep the system from logging out. I have seen all of your acolyte videos and enjoyed them all, but never fear, this is PERFECT for my purposes! A 12 hour plus video! In my normal array of UA-cam content, I would generally have to go with EFAP for something that long, but rather than their disorganized, tangent-ridden off-the-cuff conversations, which, much as I enjoy them, are unfortunately prone to lulls or slow points, I would much prefer an actual scripted monologue in your delightfully British dialect that comes across as equally erudite and bitchy. Do not think there is no place for this video among your followers.
Glad to hear it! I’d normally keep these for release prior to a second season but since there’s not going to be one, and I know quite a few people like the really long/uninterrupted ones for work/long drives, I figured there’d be no real harm sticking this one up anyway.
compilations .... THE FUTURE THEY ARE, Platoon. Assoka and Rannnngs of Powaaaaah DESERVE this treatment as well , matey. To get maximum coverage and love . Which of course is more than those shows deserve lolz
Just a small correction: Squid Game didn’t learn to speak English so much as he learned all his lines phonetically with help of his translator. Still incredibly impressive though, and shows that he actually knows how to act very well.
The guy who doesn't understand English did better than literally all of the cast, that alone should tell us of how atrocious the directing probably was.
Yeah, it's pretty awesome that he was willing and able to do that. I hope he has a great career in the West and Korea. Arnold Schwarzenegger learned his lines phonetically for Conan the Barbarian and Terminator. Anyway, I think this show had some good actors in it. Squidgame, Smilo, and X23 all have presence on screen, but the writing is just so bad. The crew on this show was good, too. The writing and direction was so bad, it blocks out all the other work on the show. The osha actor and all the witches and the green bald woman were really bad.
@@steppin-razor Watching Lil' P brilliantly (and HILARIOUSLY) dissect and autopsy this garbage is the very definition of how it is possible to make 'a silk purse out of a sows ear'. Genius is life. Watching Platoon is living. Although, we are a little like flies, feasting on a rotting corpse. But whaddyagonna do?! Buzz-buzz. Toast! Huzzah! The wicked witch is DEI dead! Long live Little Platoon! But I almost wish there WAS a 2nd season. I'm going to miss this. And Disparu. My life will be so empty now...I mean they COULD produce something good but what are the chances of THAT at this point?
Kind of reminds me of MauLer's reaction to L3 in Solo. "I didn't even know you could ruin _a ship!_ But you found a way, Disney! You fuckin' found a way!"
Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Platoon the Long? I thought not, it's not a story Disney would tell you. Darth Platoon was a master of the Sith so powerful and so eloquent he could use the scraps of plot and worldbuilding of the Acolyte to create....content. He had such a knowledge of the Acolyte that he could even keep the viewers' interest he cared about from dying. He became so interesting that the only thing he feared was losing his interest, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he told the Jedi what to do when they captured Smilo Ren and then the Jedi ignored him, creating a cascade of stupidity and death in their wake. Ironic really, he could save others from boredom, but not himself......
It’s not for Little Platoon to lower himself to the limits of the welsh, but for those colonists to raise themselves to the heights of English culture.
Knowing that your 14-hour Acolyte video will get more views and more love than The Acolyte brings joy to my heart and tickles the schadenfreude I feel towards Headlamp & Co. Plus you didn't need $ 180 million to give us entertainment, Platoon. Well done!❤
Too bad it's been cancelled. These reviews have been the most entertaining things I've seen all year. Thank you sir I was laughing so hard my abs hurt 😂😅
It was indeed Platoon who gave us this banger of a conversation [spoiler] "I'm surprised they killed Jeckie and Yord." "Which one was Jeckien Nord?" Really enjoy you, man.
That reminds me of when I drove for a living, doing hot-shotting for the oilfield. I was always desperate for good long content. Platoon would have saved me many a frantic morning of anxiety... _"oh no, alone with my thoughts, quick find something anything-"_ 😂 ...sure had a lot of money back then though. I shouldn't a quit, I shouldn'tafuckin quit 😢
So I just realized something (and yes I am still here going through this bit by bit while working). Mae tells Trinity in episode 1 that the Jedi do in fact attack the unarmed. If this is in reference to Master Squid Game killing her mother in episode 7, then that means Headland's idea of "unarmed" is that they don't have a physical weapon out in the moment. Which means she likely didn't consider Harvey Weinstein assaulting those women as an attack at all since he was likely "unarmed."
@@NeoakiraIV Now that Weinstein is out of the picture and considering that she actually said that the idea of taking a young, impressionable woman and molding her into...something...excites her (in reference to Osha being in Green Bean's custody), I think it's safe to say she's the master...for now.
There's a moment in the EU when Luke is confronted with a dark sider pulling that. He retorted they both knew that was BS, alluding to the fact that anyone who has the Force can scarcely be considered helpless.
I had hoped for an exhaustive, detailed, blow by blow listing of all the plot contradictions, abysmal aesthetic choices, lore busting mistakes of The Acolyte but I suppose this mini vid will have to suffice. Really now, there should be an encyclopedia developed to document the monstrosity that is The Acolyte. Like all the critiques combined. A tribute to this glorious failure. It was deliciously bad. It will become a cult classic. We shall miss you, Jediabetes. You too, Master Kia Seoul. And you Darth Naked. Farewell.
George seemed to love to hate the Christmas Special. I believe he was on record saying, half-jokingly, if he could find and destroy every copy, he would. Disney though? They'd memory hole anything if it became enough of an inconvenience.
You mad legend. An entire 14 hours of Acolyte Just enough to snuff out any intelligent life-form who is vulnerable to cringe, unhinged writing decisions, and overall crushing stupidity. Just so only the strongest of us could survive.
Oh god, like you just spied on me. I listen your videos before sleeping cause I find your humor entertaining and your voice plesent. Learning english is another bonus. Thank you for this! And I guess good night!
I eagerly await the twitter post of just the thumbnail and the timecode, saying that this is terrible and if anyone asks they say that they haven't watch it. Classic
@@Kveldred It does seem like the only way to get a video out of Mauler's main channel now is for something to be supremely foul or for the general public to be cheering on something he considers a 1/2 out of 10. Other than that... well it'll be done when it's done (in 5-6 years).
It’s not for Little Platoon to lower himself to the limits of the welsh, but for those colonists to raise themselves to the heights of English culture.
14hrs... holy hell man! I'm definitely going to watch it all, just don't be surprised when it takes me a few days to do it. Thanks for all your suffering (watching this slow motion train wreck, without all the payoff you get from an actual train wreck, you're more of a -sadist- trooper than I am). The results of those endless hours of suffering have been amazingly funny!
Platoon, we appreciate all your sacrifice. Your loss of time will not be forgotten, you have brought much joy, vindication, and humor to the bleak state of star wars to many with your suave, posh accent and critique. You are my favorite part-time gay on youtube.
Darth Plagueis being canonically stuck in a cave as a dirty hobo is the best part of the whole thing. That's canon now. It's amazing. They can't say that isn't Darth Plagueis. That's irrefutably him unless you're being intellectually dishonest, and for anyone to be doing that they're just using misplaced coping mechanisms.
Sure I can. It's Disney-verse bullshit and I will not accept it as canon. my Canon was the Expanded Lore prior to Disney's arrival. They cannot enforce any other canon upon my mind.
Also who even is Plagueis is disney cannon anyway? Wasn’t named in the show, so how is it anything more than dumb-hobo cave monster? Platoon was correct, disney burns the old cannon and disregards it, until they need a new name to pluck out and mishandle, then disregards it all again. I’m not giving them the old cannon, this isn’t plagueis, it’s stupid cave goblin. If they want to try their own take on Plagueis some time… I’d say good luck because they aren’t capable of writing well, but I wouldn’t even want to send them my ironic well wishes.
@@rawr70101 Plagueis was a Muun, and so was Sam Hill, one of the separatist leaders. Without any context provided by Disney (since Plagueis never appeared in the Prequels), people would hav no choice but to assume this was a hobo who had something to do with the future separatist movement. The cameo was nothing else than a "f**k you" to those who have the context because of the EU but cannot do anything about it.
14 hours of detailed analysis of the material with high-level sarcasm... with owner of the voice that I can listen to for days, oh yes, dreams do come true (sometimes ;))
12:40:54 What's even better about THE BEST CHOREOGRAPHY OF ALL TIME is that the cue to yank Smilo Ren backwards occurs a good second after he starts moving backwards from Squid Game's kick, and so appears to suddenly gain momentum from nowhere. Truly amazing work.
And to think I was previously impressed with you making reviews that are longer than the runtime of films, now you’re making reviews longer than that of an entire Disney+ series!
I watched every minute of this Acolyte deconstruction the first time around, and i will watch it all again. Thank you for your sacrifice Platoon, this entertained me far more than the source material ever could have.
I did it. It took me most of this week, but I made it through all 14 hours of this video from beginning to end, and I was far more entertained by it than I would have been had I spent that time watching The Acolyte.
*I remember seeing a mug in the shape of a First Order helmet… at the Dollar Tree.* Yes, the sequel merch sold so little that it the prices were lowered to a single dollar! Disney’s business model has relied so heavily in the past on physical goods. I’m surprised there was merch of The Acolyte at all! With so little demand, with the expenses of toy manufacturing, it’s very clear that The Acolyte is not worth the hassle. And if you can’t understand that, please stay several leagues away from the nearest Star Wars franchise.
Disney logic: Well, since we never set the canon, since we burned the previous canon, there’s nothing to ruin, is there? We could hand it off to anyone! I find their lack of imagination disturbing.
With the EU they had the chance for a gamut of well written series to adapt. Decades of solid income burnt on altar of talentless hackery and false economy.
3:11:52 This is my only issue with this review, and I had the same problem with the original video this came from. A planet doesn't have to have "a big enough gravitational pull to attract stars". All celestial objects exert gravity upon all gravitational objects. The only deciding factors are mass and distance. Those stars WILL have a small gravitational pull on them by Kamino, especially if they're close enough. We can detect gravitational waves, via the LIGO installation, of two black holes colliding many light years away. If we can do that, the tech in Star Wars can undoubtedly detect the minor gravitation pull that Kamino WILL have on its neighboring stars, even if it's miniscule. Especially considering they'd HAVE to detect that kind of stuff to operate in hyperspace, mass shadows and all that existing as they do. Other than this? Great review.
Dude, you've got not only the most salient points, a great sense of humor, and a relaxing voice/accent...but you care about the material while you don't much care for monetization if you are willing to make a 14hr video...I'm definitely falling asleep to this tonight...lol...
3:20:19 I looked it up and it turns out babies usually begin to understand object permanence, the concept that objects continue to exist even when they're not visible (and by extension, objects that aren't visible come from somewhere), around 6 to 9 months of age. The writers of The Acolyte are cognitively operating at a level BENEATH pre-walking babies.
This was basically my Saturday morning cartoon as each part aired. I wake up, I see a Platoon Acolyte video, I whip up some dinner and popcorn, I watch.
Man, it is wild seeing the reviews of the earlier episodes with all of those theories, then getting into the later ones and watch in horror how they went with the worst possible option every single time. Bloody hilarious XDDD
If only the hunted almost to extinction witches hadn't decided to hide on a planet that would interest the Jedi because it's full of life when it should be a devasted ruin.
5 місяців тому+3
Good to see I've got my going to sleep video sorted for at least the next month with this.
It took a while but watching this all the way through was a real treat. One aspect of your presentation is the incredibly detailed use of movie clips at just the right moments. Hats off to you and your team for this effort.
In my head canon, the second the camera turns off and the show ends, Yoda goes "Think me stupid, do you? Well stupid you are. You lied to the council, to the senate, and to the Jedi! To jail you go!" Then Plagueis just stabs both Smilo and Occupational Safety and Health Administration.
Going to let the video play while i go to sleep, wake up, get ready and go to work, and I'll still have like 2 hours to listen to at work...tomorrow. Not even a joke. Just math and the plan.
Little Platoon is far more of an entertainer than the mega billion dollar company called Disney. We are living in a time where legitimate criticism of movies is more entertaining than the entertainment being criticized. Such a fascinating time to be recorded alive.
I'm only a little under 4 hours into this supercut, but I have to give proper applause to the sheer unbridled unstoppable quintessentially English stubbornness in obstinately insisting on referring to Osha EXCLUSIVELY as Occupational Safety and Health Administration every single time there is occasion to speak her name. Platoon, I salute you, sir! :D
I am proud to say that I have not watched a single episode of the Acolyte. The reviews/critiques are what kept me from wasting my time with it. But funnily enough, I am not wasting my time watching them. I am entertained and educated of incompetence.
It took me 2 and half weeks but finally I made it through this compilation.... and now I am dead again....I mean I have transformed into the force.... Looking forward to your future projects. Thank you. :)
The perfect video for when you have one of those days when you have roughly 14 and a quater hours spare. Just what i was looking for. Deserves a like just for the run time alone. 👏
I NEED TIMESTAMPS!!!!!! Seriously tho, thanks for this. I just pick a random spot & fall asleep to it at night. 2 of my fave current trends…slamming The Acolyte & your voice.
6:51:07 oh my god, when he said "slapping is involved" in the context of the original Gundam series, i somehow just instantly knew, i *_KNEW_* which specific scene was coming, the way he just rolls in from off screen and wipes her across the face in that scene is equal measure incredibly iconic and hilarious, what a meme lmfao
14 hours.. nice time to watch (again for some/if not most of it) As I wrote this.. I realized it came out 13 hours ago so if you started it upon release you still aren't done it yet. o/ Hello watchers lol
Just a lil supercut of all the Acolyte videos. Work continues on Rings of Power.
I have tweaked the audio on it in my permanent quest to accidentally make it sound good. If anyone is masochistic enough to have seen the original and the supercut versions, lemme know if it’s any better.
Not the RingS! (Quote Nicolas Cage)
gather round peasants, it is the "morals guy" with his critiques ^-^
i didnt see it all but you sir, hats off, did a great job on efap 300 :D
Where's the Dune video? This series, and RoP for that matter, simply don't deserve even this amount of attention. I understand that the new popular thing gets the views, but you're Dune analysis is a superior quality of work using superior raw material.
16:14 I don't care if you are gay Platoon,
I just want you to stop mentioning it.... forever.
can't wait to see what u have to say Rings of Power, it's also a bad show
14 hours of the Acolyte?? I believe this is a violation of the Geneva Convention.
Lmaooo
And a violation of the Carta Magna too
Well he already did 14 hours, it just was 8 separate videos.
@@TEDodd Yeah I know. He's probably in therapy now, the poor sod.
Remember … it’s only a war crime if your side loses 😊
Platoon is fighting Mauler for the Longman title I see XD
Well, in another fifteen years, when Mauler manages to upload his next video, we'll find out who wins!
@@KveldredTFA wen?
@@KveldredIt'll somehow be a 20 year long video, just about the first episode.
In my EFAP headcanon he's a long lost cousin of Mauler. That level of "the long" can only be a generic blessing Longman family.
@@Arko777777 That's one theory. Another is that HE IS MAULER before he began tampering with Eldritch magic & got transformed into the abomination that he is today... A welsh man. OH GOD THE HUMANITY!
Platoon: "The upload is now complete. When I left you I was but the Efapper, now I am the Longman."
Mauler: "Only a Longman of (Compilation), Platoon."
😂
I actually want them to see this, this'd be funny
Imagine someone made an edit with their logos but MauLer and TLP actually did the voices for it
This comment will be perfect... when it fits a lesbian space witch.
Peak fire comment
14 min 16 sec compilation, that's not too... hold on, that's not minutes.
HOLD ON, THAT'S HOURS?!
I had the exact same reaction...
"we're going to need a bigger boat..."
Hello there.
They’re not mountains…
@@RorytheRomulanGeneral Kenobi!
Little Platoon, I work 12 hour shifts, where I need to respond to issues and generate reports and computer logs for them, but if nothing happens for a few minutes, the computer signs me out of Windows as a security measure, and then, when I have to make a new log entry, I have to sign in again. I recently discovered that if you leave a video playing in a browser window, that counts as activity, and will keep the system from logging out.
I have seen all of your acolyte videos and enjoyed them all, but never fear, this is PERFECT for my purposes! A 12 hour plus video! In my normal array of UA-cam content, I would generally have to go with EFAP for something that long, but rather than their disorganized, tangent-ridden off-the-cuff conversations, which, much as I enjoy them, are unfortunately prone to lulls or slow points, I would much prefer an actual scripted monologue in your delightfully British dialect that comes across as equally erudite and bitchy.
Do not think there is no place for this video among your followers.
Glad to hear it! I’d normally keep these for release prior to a second season but since there’s not going to be one, and I know quite a few people like the really long/uninterrupted ones for work/long drives, I figured there’d be no real harm sticking this one up anyway.
This story of a beleaguered man finding salvation has made my night. Thus it shall be remembered.
Lyf: Hacked
I am one of them! I go to sleep with your video and wake up with it@@TheLittlePlatoon
@@verazollinger6862 Happy platoon dreaming!
FOURTEEN HOURS? we are definitely seated
14 hours!! Thank you for the warning. I’ll save this for the weekend.
I looked at the time ticker and thought it was 14min, 16sec and a bit! I'll give that a quick watch - oh.
Przez chwilę zastanawiałam się czy dobrze widzę ^^.
i did double take ... 14 hours??? Just HOW???? 😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😮
Fah-fah-fah-fah... fah-fah-fah... _fourteen hours!?!_
I wish platoon could release this as a blu-ray with behind the scenes footage and directors commentary
compilations .... THE FUTURE THEY ARE, Platoon. Assoka and Rannnngs of Powaaaaah DESERVE this treatment as well , matey. To get maximum coverage and love . Which of course is more than those shows deserve lolz
Anakin blowing up the Death Star with the One Ring to defeat the Klingon Empire really inspired me too bro
my favorite is when Anakin believed in the power of nakama and defeated Freeza with the gum gum double barrel
"And my axe"
While yelling “IT’S MORBIN TIME”
The saying "another wrong does not make it right" must be redefined
Yeah, definitely the best episode of Avatar
Back in the day you would feel embarrassed to admit you were a Star Wars fan. Today you would feel embarrassed to admit you were a Star Wars fan.
One does not simply admit they are a star wars fan
See it's like poetry, it rhymes
I love that this supercut is both more entertaining and has a greater run time than The Acolyte series itself.
Just a small correction: Squid Game didn’t learn to speak English so much as he learned all his lines phonetically with help of his translator. Still incredibly impressive though, and shows that he actually knows how to act very well.
Then his translator did a phenomenal job explaining the emotional bits to him
_Why_ is this apparent?
He still managed to be the best part of the show while barely knowing English
The guy who doesn't understand English did better than literally all of the cast, that alone should tell us of how atrocious the directing probably was.
Yeah, it's pretty awesome that he was willing and able to do that. I hope he has a great career in the West and Korea. Arnold Schwarzenegger learned his lines phonetically for Conan the Barbarian and Terminator.
Anyway, I think this show had some good actors in it. Squidgame, Smilo, and X23 all have presence on screen, but the writing is just so bad.
The crew on this show was good, too. The writing and direction was so bad, it blocks out all the other work on the show. The osha actor and all the witches and the green bald woman were really bad.
14 hours.... Jesus man is that how long I've already spent watching these the first time!?!?
Yea wtffff I have no life damn
@@steppin-razor Watching Lil' P brilliantly (and HILARIOUSLY) dissect and autopsy this garbage is the very definition of how it is possible to make 'a silk purse out of a sows ear'. Genius is life. Watching Platoon is living. Although, we are a little like flies, feasting on a rotting corpse. But whaddyagonna do?! Buzz-buzz. Toast! Huzzah! The wicked witch is DEI dead! Long live Little Platoon! But I almost wish there WAS a 2nd season. I'm going to miss this. And Disparu. My life will be so empty now...I mean they COULD produce something good but what are the chances of THAT at this point?
Ikr like wow that's longer than I realised
7:45 "At least going hundreds of years back in time means the skywalker name cannot be reduced any further."
Yet somehow they managed to do it...
I was gonna ask what you meant, then I remembered the Witches invented the Vergence and Anakin basically comes from them
Kind of reminds me of MauLer's reaction to L3 in Solo. "I didn't even know you could ruin _a ship!_ But you found a way, Disney! You fuckin' found a way!"
Buckle up boys we’re watching this bad boy the whole way through
Godspeed brave souls
YEEEEEEHHHHAAAWWW COWBOY 🤠
HOO-RAH
HERE WE GOOOOO (Mario voice)
Whisky and cigars at the ready
Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Platoon the Long? I thought not, it's not a story Disney would tell you. Darth Platoon was a master of the Sith so powerful and so eloquent he could use the scraps of plot and worldbuilding of the Acolyte to create....content. He had such a knowledge of the Acolyte that he could even keep the viewers' interest he cared about from dying. He became so interesting that the only thing he feared was losing his interest, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he told the Jedi what to do when they captured Smilo Ren and then the Jedi ignored him, creating a cascade of stupidity and death in their wake. Ironic really, he could save others from boredom, but not himself......
Is it possible to learn this power?
I present you, good sir, with the golf clap of golf claps. ⛳👏
@@Susan_K Not from a TikTok.....
Fourteen hours. Fourteen. Don't expect to be invited back on EFAP after mogging Mauler like this.
The Little 'Mog' Platoon
It’s not for Little Platoon to lower himself to the limits of the welsh, but for those colonists to raise themselves to the heights of English culture.
Knowing that your 14-hour Acolyte video will get more views and more love than The Acolyte brings joy to my heart and tickles the schadenfreude I feel towards Headlamp & Co. Plus you didn't need $ 180 million to give us entertainment, Platoon. Well done!❤
Rest in Pieces, The Acolyte. You were missed by many in life, and will be missed by one or two in death.
Too bad it's been cancelled. These reviews have been the most entertaining things I've seen all year. Thank you sir I was laughing so hard my abs hurt 😂😅
This review is the best proof that Acolyte has brought much joy, delight and value to this world ☺
This is truly the golden age of second-order entertainment.
It was indeed Platoon who gave us this banger of a conversation [spoiler] "I'm surprised they killed Jeckie and Yord." "Which one was Jeckien Nord?" Really enjoy you, man.
Thank you for uploading a compilation. I have job coming in Utah, 11hr drive one way. Your dulcet tones will see me through much of the journey.
That reminds me of when I drove for a living, doing hot-shotting for the oilfield. I was always desperate for good long content. Platoon would have saved me many a frantic morning of anxiety... _"oh no, alone with my thoughts, quick find something anything-"_ 😂
...sure had a lot of money back then though. I shouldn't a quit, I shouldn'tafuckin quit 😢
A
14 hours? Damn, lad.
I appreciate all the energy and the loss of sanity it took for you to review all these episodes 👌😇
This is...what...three times as long as the frigging show lmao
@@Blisterdude123I thought it would be more but actually it's surprisingly not quite
A one-stop shop compilation of Platoon's Acolyte reviews that can play for almost two full workdays?
YES.
If you watch the video at 4x speed, you can watch it twice in one workday.
So I just realized something (and yes I am still here going through this bit by bit while working). Mae tells Trinity in episode 1 that the Jedi do in fact attack the unarmed. If this is in reference to Master Squid Game killing her mother in episode 7, then that means Headland's idea of "unarmed" is that they don't have a physical weapon out in the moment. Which means she likely didn't consider Harvey Weinstein assaulting those women as an attack at all since he was likely "unarmed."
Always two there are a master and apprentice, which one is Leslie the master or the apprentice
@@NeoakiraIV Now that Weinstein is out of the picture and considering that she actually said that the idea of taking a young, impressionable woman and molding her into...something...excites her (in reference to Osha being in Green Bean's custody), I think it's safe to say she's the master...for now.
There's a moment in the EU when Luke is confronted with a dark sider pulling that. He retorted they both knew that was BS, alluding to the fact that anyone who has the Force can scarcely be considered helpless.
Anyone who could watch this in one sitting has my respect.
Both my respect and my fear. Who are you to have such immense and unflinching patience? And more importantly how do I not get on your bad side?
Challenge accepted
But does anyone who can watch it in one sitting have any self-respect? No.
If anyone needs me, I can get back to you in about 14 hours. 😅
TLP be like: My friends! You bow to _no one_
Challenge accepted x2 :D
I had hoped for an exhaustive, detailed, blow by blow listing of all the plot contradictions, abysmal aesthetic choices, lore busting mistakes of The Acolyte but I suppose this mini vid will have to suffice. Really now, there should be an encyclopedia developed to document the monstrosity that is The Acolyte. Like all the critiques combined. A tribute to this glorious failure. It was deliciously bad. It will become a cult classic. We shall miss you, Jediabetes. You too, Master Kia Seoul. And you Darth Naked. Farewell.
George seemed to love to hate the Christmas Special. I believe he was on record saying, half-jokingly, if he could find and destroy every copy, he would. Disney though? They'd memory hole anything if it became enough of an inconvenience.
You mad legend. An entire 14 hours of Acolyte
Just enough to snuff out any intelligent life-form who is vulnerable to cringe, unhinged writing decisions, and overall crushing stupidity. Just so only the strongest of us could survive.
Oh god, like you just spied on me. I listen your videos before sleeping cause I find your humor entertaining and your voice plesent. Learning english is another bonus. Thank you for this! And I guess good night!
I eagerly await the twitter post of just the thumbnail and the timecode, saying that this is terrible and if anyone asks they say that they haven't watch it. Classic
14hr? Well there goes tomorrow's plans...
This will probably have higher viewership than the series!
"This is just sadistic!" - Keem (probably)
14 hours!! The gauntlet has been laid down Mauler, over to you…so called “Longman” 😂
Can't wait to see Mauler's response
in fifteen years
@@Kveldred🤣🤣🤣
@@Kveldred It does seem like the only way to get a video out of Mauler's main channel now is for something to be supremely foul or for the general public to be cheering on something he considers a 1/2 out of 10. Other than that... well it'll be done when it's done (in 5-6 years).
It’s not for Little Platoon to lower himself to the limits of the welsh, but for those colonists to raise themselves to the heights of English culture.
14hrs... holy hell man! I'm definitely going to watch it all, just don't be surprised when it takes me a few days to do it. Thanks for all your suffering (watching this slow motion train wreck, without all the payoff you get from an actual train wreck, you're more of a -sadist- trooper than I am). The results of those endless hours of suffering have been amazingly funny!
Platoon, we appreciate all your sacrifice. Your loss of time will not be forgotten, you have brought much joy, vindication, and humor to the bleak state of star wars to many with your suave, posh accent and critique. You are my favorite part-time gay on youtube.
OH MAH GAWD! Plat has finally transmogrified into a TRUE LONG MAN
Darth Plagueis being canonically stuck in a cave as a dirty hobo is the best part of the whole thing. That's canon now. It's amazing. They can't say that isn't Darth Plagueis. That's irrefutably him unless you're being intellectually dishonest, and for anyone to be doing that they're just using misplaced coping mechanisms.
Sure I can. It's Disney-verse bullshit and I will not accept it as canon. my Canon was the Expanded Lore prior to Disney's arrival. They cannot enforce any other canon upon my mind.
@@kinagrill My canon is always the Thrawn Trilogy and Dark Empire.
Yeah, everything Disney is bad fan fiction.
Also who even is Plagueis is disney cannon anyway? Wasn’t named in the show, so how is it anything more than dumb-hobo cave monster? Platoon was correct, disney burns the old cannon and disregards it, until they need a new name to pluck out and mishandle, then disregards it all again.
I’m not giving them the old cannon, this isn’t plagueis, it’s stupid cave goblin. If they want to try their own take on Plagueis some time… I’d say good luck because they aren’t capable of writing well, but I wouldn’t even want to send them my ironic well wishes.
@@rawr70101 Plagueis was a Muun, and so was Sam Hill, one of the separatist leaders. Without any context provided by Disney (since Plagueis never appeared in the Prequels), people would hav no choice but to assume this was a hobo who had something to do with the future separatist movement.
The cameo was nothing else than a "f**k you" to those who have the context because of the EU but cannot do anything about it.
The power of maaanyyy hours!!
Honest to god, I fired up youtube to create a playlist of Platoons videos on Acolyte. And tt's just.... here. Love it! ❤
14 hours of detailed analysis of the material with high-level sarcasm... with owner of the voice that I can listen to for days, oh yes, dreams do come true (sometimes ;))
This is where the fun begins…
Game time started...
12:40:54 What's even better about THE BEST CHOREOGRAPHY OF ALL TIME is that the cue to yank Smilo Ren backwards occurs a good second after he starts moving backwards from Squid Game's kick, and so appears to suddenly gain momentum from nowhere. Truly amazing work.
I dont think my body can handle all this acolyte in one sittin
And to think I was previously impressed with you making reviews that are longer than the runtime of films, now you’re making reviews longer than that of an entire Disney+ series!
I watched every minute of this Acolyte deconstruction the first time around, and i will watch it all again.
Thank you for your sacrifice Platoon, this entertained me far more than the source material ever could have.
Darth Plagius: Dirty Hobo.....i'd watch that
The idea of Darth Plagus busking for change or joining a crust punk band sounds terrific. Plagus Hobo and the Freight Trains.
"Chronicles of The Dirty Hobo"
Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis the Wino?
General little Platoon
He is a late one.
I did it. It took me most of this week, but I made it through all 14 hours of this video from beginning to end, and I was far more entertained by it than I would have been had I spent that time watching The Acolyte.
Oh sweet I have something to watch for the next ... several days, probably. ❤
Ahhh I didn’t watch any of them specifically waiting (and hoping) for a supercut, and was rewarded for my patience - thank you for the video!
Every time he says Occupational And Safety Health Administration, I chuckle. I think I might be simple.
I think so
HK-47 being smarter than whole writing team. Gotta love our little psycho droid.
*I remember seeing a mug in the shape of a First Order helmet… at the Dollar Tree.*
Yes, the sequel merch sold so little that it the prices were lowered to a single dollar!
Disney’s business model has relied so heavily in the past on physical goods. I’m surprised there was merch of The Acolyte at all! With so little demand, with the expenses of toy manufacturing, it’s very clear that The Acolyte is not worth the hassle.
And if you can’t understand that, please stay several leagues away from the nearest Star Wars franchise.
14 HOURS? Nah, this requires a seat in the cinema because I'm locked in
Disney logic: Well, since we never set the canon, since we burned the previous canon, there’s nothing to ruin, is there? We could hand it off to anyone!
I find their lack of imagination disturbing.
With the EU they had the chance for a gamut of well written series to adapt. Decades of solid income burnt on altar of talentless hackery and false economy.
Guys make sure you are using wifi and not data before watching 🙏
3:11:52
This is my only issue with this review, and I had the same problem with the original video this came from. A planet doesn't have to have "a big enough gravitational pull to attract stars". All celestial objects exert gravity upon all gravitational objects. The only deciding factors are mass and distance. Those stars WILL have a small gravitational pull on them by Kamino, especially if they're close enough.
We can detect gravitational waves, via the LIGO installation, of two black holes colliding many light years away. If we can do that, the tech in Star Wars can undoubtedly detect the minor gravitation pull that Kamino WILL have on its neighboring stars, even if it's miniscule. Especially considering they'd HAVE to detect that kind of stuff to operate in hyperspace, mass shadows and all that existing as they do.
Other than this? Great review.
Mauler: I am the longman
Platoon: and I am… the longerman
Kookookachu
Thank God- I was about to run two marathons. Now I have something to listen to
Dude, you've got not only the most salient points, a great sense of humor, and a relaxing voice/accent...but you care about the material while you don't much care for monetization if you are willing to make a 14hr video...I'm definitely falling asleep to this tonight...lol...
I thought this was 14 minutes but damn me. 14 hours of scrutiny. I'm all in. let me mince every second of it.
3:20:19
I looked it up and it turns out babies usually begin to understand object permanence, the concept that objects continue to exist even when they're not visible (and by extension, objects that aren't visible come from somewhere), around 6 to 9 months of age. The writers of The Acolyte are cognitively operating at a level BENEATH pre-walking babies.
This was basically my Saturday morning cartoon as each part aired. I wake up, I see a Platoon Acolyte video, I whip up some dinner and popcorn, I watch.
Man, it is wild seeing the reviews of the earlier episodes with all of those theories, then getting into the later ones and watch in horror how they went with the worst possible option every single time. Bloody hilarious XDDD
TLP, are you ok ? 14 hours of this I'm concerned for your sanity and well being 😭 take the vacation you deserve!
*Mom:* You can watch one more UA-cam video before you go to bed.
*The Video:*
If only the hunted almost to extinction witches hadn't decided to hide on a planet that would interest the Jedi because it's full of life when it should be a devasted ruin.
Good to see I've got my going to sleep video sorted for at least the next month with this.
Did you say the Rings of Power review would be one of similar length to this? Oh dear, that's going to be epic!
Platoon, you wonderful human being! Thank you for this!
The power of 1, the power of 2, the power of 14...
It took a while but watching this all the way through was a real treat. One aspect of your presentation is the incredibly detailed use of movie clips at just the right moments. Hats off to you and your team for this effort.
The Acolyte: A Quick Retrospective.
after countless videos watched and 6 hours into this one . what got me to sub was your fine gundam reference. excellent job.
14 hours? My night has been made. Thanks for the compilation!
14 HOURS of Little Platoon? "Good, more for meee."
In my head canon, the second the camera turns off and the show ends, Yoda goes "Think me stupid, do you? Well stupid you are. You lied to the council, to the senate, and to the Jedi! To jail you go!" Then Plagueis just stabs both Smilo and Occupational Safety and Health Administration.
And, with this, I can eliminate my son's white noise machine...
This is one of those moments when you're like "14 hours??? It felt like 2"
Got my entertainment for the next three days
Going to let the video play while i go to sleep, wake up, get ready and go to work, and I'll still have like 2 hours to listen to at work...tomorrow.
Not even a joke. Just math and the plan.
Thanks for making these videos, I've seen a listened to a few of them and they are very entertaining.
Keep up the great work.
Platoon officially trying to dethrone the Longman Mauler 😂 This is getting out of hand. Now there are 2 of them!
YESSS! Finished the entire 14+ hours of video! Good job, I'm looking forward to the next one!
Little Platoon is far more of an entertainer than the mega billion dollar company called Disney.
We are living in a time where legitimate criticism of movies is more entertaining than the entertainment being criticized. Such a fascinating time to be recorded alive.
I love your stuff Little Platoon but I’m going to have to watch this one over time.
Oh my God... FourTEEN HOURS? This is gonna take me a couple days, but I'm watching it.
I'm only a little under 4 hours into this supercut, but I have to give proper applause to the sheer unbridled unstoppable quintessentially English stubbornness in obstinately insisting on referring to Osha EXCLUSIVELY as Occupational Safety and Health Administration every single time there is occasion to speak her name. Platoon, I salute you, sir! :D
this video has about one hundred times the entertainment value of the show itself
I'm certain it'll get more viewers too
I am proud to say that I have not watched a single episode of the Acolyte. The reviews/critiques are what kept me from wasting my time with it.
But funnily enough, I am not wasting my time watching them. I am entertained and educated of incompetence.
Ladies and gentlemen, let your families know you’re about to disappear for the next 14 hours.
It took me 2 and half weeks but finally I made it through this compilation.... and now I am dead again....I mean I have transformed into the force.... Looking forward to your future projects. Thank you. :)
14 hours of shitting on Disney Star Wars? Better put over some popcorn
The perfect video for when you have one of those days when you have roughly 14 and a quater hours spare.
Just what i was looking for. Deserves a like just for the run time alone. 👏
Wait a second... THOSE ARENT MINUTES
I NEED TIMESTAMPS!!!!!! Seriously tho, thanks for this. I just pick a random spot & fall asleep to it at night. 2 of my fave current trends…slamming The Acolyte & your voice.
14 hours 😂😂😂
In England, Star Wars watches you.
6:51:07 oh my god, when he said "slapping is involved" in the context of the original Gundam series, i somehow just instantly knew, i *_KNEW_* which specific scene was coming, the way he just rolls in from off screen and wipes her across the face in that scene is equal measure incredibly iconic and hilarious, what a meme lmfao
14 hours.. nice time to watch (again for some/if not most of it)
As I wrote this.. I realized it came out 13 hours ago so if you started it upon release you still aren't done it yet. o/ Hello watchers lol
Platoon throws down the gauntlet to the 'Long Man' Mauler.
Meanwhile Mauler is running a 30 hour live stream all weekend to celebrate EFA milestone.