sorry to be so offtopic but does someone know a way to get back into an Instagram account?? I was stupid forgot my password. I would appreciate any tips you can give me
This couldnt come at a more perfect time! I was *just* reading and reflecting on the sections in "Home Education" on the habits of attention and obedience! I especially loved Miss Mason's emphasis that a parent's emphasis on these habits must come from a place of wanting to help children do what is right!
This is so helpful! Thank you. After the habit of giving your best effort could you do the habit of obedience? I know a lot of people struggle with it and see questions asked on facebook CM groups regarding obedience quite often.
The habits can be targeted in any order that you feel would best suit your family! Obedience is a challenging one, however it is foundational for so many things! Here are some other posts on helping you establish this habit. Authority and Obedience: Core Values of Charlotte Mason simplycharlottemason.com/blog/authority-and-obedience-core-values-of-charlotte-mason/ 5 Ways to Work on the Habit of Obedience: simplycharlottemason.com/blog/5-ways-to-work-on-the-habit-of-obedience/
I wash going to start with putting shoes away after getting in, but I think I will start with the habit of concentration first. It'll help with all other habits
These sound like great ideas! Sometimes when thinking through our next habit and even once we have started a habit it can become clear that an underlying habit that is necessary to be successful with the original target needs to be worked on first. It sounds like you have a great plan here! Come back and let us know how it goes and as always please reach out with any questions that you may have as you get started!
Today I just want to say THANK YOU AND GOD BLESS YOU. Simply Charlotte Mason has been a blessing, a rescue for me, a great help in the path of home education. I am really greatfull for all the knowledge, advices, and tons of information you generously share in order we (moms form different parts of the world) can understand Mrs. Masson´s ideas and be able to apply her wonderful method in our homeschool. Hugs from Chía -Colombia :)
This channel is germ not found yet by so many people. I also am pretty late to notice this lovely channel, but I learnt a lot as I chose to become a teacher and show great role model for my students. I want to rise and bring my students with me, so this channel assists me. Ocean thanks. Keep up the good work.
My 4 year old is struggeling auth obedience lately, however I feel it's due to get lack of a good foundation of attentiveness. I watched this tonight hoping for ideas to help. I think you've given me great ideas to start with. Thank you
It’s difficult, if not impossible, to give standard consequences that will be appropriate for every child in every situation. So much of that decision depends on the child’s personality, age, background, whether this is an ongoing issue or a single occurrence, attitude, and all of the circumstances involved. Usually, in general terms, taking away something the child likes or adding something the child does not like can be a consequence; for example, taking away privileges, adding extra chores or work, taking away freedom (the child must stay at your side for a set time). Another possibility is removing whatever is causing the distraction; for example, toys or phone or going to bed earlier (if the cause is tiredness). But you will need to carefully and wisely determine what will be best for your unique child in your particular situation. The key is to act from a place of thoughtfulness and firm love, doing what will help that child most.
Thank you for this awesome video! I was wondering if anyone had ideas for appropriate consequences for a four year old when not listening the first time. Thanks!
Perhaps narrowing down the habit of obedience in small pieces will help expose more natural consequences. This blog post gives ideas on how to do that: simplycharlottemason.com/blog/5-ways-to-work-on-the-habit-of-obedience/
This is really helpful. Starting with The Rails this week, and had decided to start with Attention, this is a great help as I plan our work, thank you.
I have enjoyed learning more about this topic! Could you make suggestions for age appropriate activities for attention and for consequences? It would be helpful to be able to look up a podcast on specific ages and how you would flesh it out for that age, so I could better understand what it looks like. Thank you!
Here is a series on habits with a Q&A as well as ideas for multiple scenarios that may be of interest to you as a starting point, such as, special needs, older children, multiple children, how to break bad habits, and more: simplycharlottemason.com/blog/habits-q-amp-a-consequences/
I’ve been working on my own habit training, you have reminded me to kickstart one of them that I let go for a week while I was sick: keeping my room neat by straightening as I go and ensuing it is done before going to bed. Sigh, room cleaning today it is 😂
It’s difficult, if not impossible, to give standard consequences that will be appropriate for every child in every situation. So much of that decision depends on the child’s personality, age, background, whether this is an ongoing issue or a single occurrence, attitude, and all of the circumstances involved. Usually, in general terms, taking away something the child likes or adding something the child does not like can be a consequence; for example, taking away privileges, adding extra chores or work, taking away freedom (the child must stay at your side for a set time). Another possibility is removing whatever is causing the distraction; for example, toys or phone or going to bed earlier (if the cause is tiredness). But you will need to carefully and wisely determine what will be best for your unique child in your particular situation. The key is to act from a place of thoughtfulness and firm love, doing what will help that child most.
What are some consequences that would be considered in line with not listening the first time? I have a tendency to give too hard of a consequence and it kills his motivation.
It’s difficult, if not impossible, to give standard consequences that will be appropriate for every child in every situation. So much of that decision depends on the child’s personality, age, background, whether this is an ongoing issue or a single occurrence, attitude, and all of the circumstances involved. Usually, in general terms, taking away something the child likes or adding something the child does not like can be a consequence; for example, taking away privileges, adding extra chores or work, taking away freedom (the child must stay at your side for a set time). Another possibility is removing whatever is causing the distraction; for example, toys or phone or going to bed earlier (if the cause is tiredness). But you will need to carefully and wisely determine what will be best for your unique child in your particular situation. The key is to act from a place of thoughtfulness and firm love, doing what will help that child most.
That decision is up to you to determine what is best for your family. I'd suggest watching this video we did on screen time: ua-cam.com/video/VzvSJNutPg0/v-deo.html
It’s difficult, if not impossible, to give standard consequences that will be appropriate for every child in every situation. So much of that decision depends on the child’s personality, age, background, whether this is an ongoing issue or a single occurrence, attitude, and all of the circumstances involved. Usually, in general terms, taking away something the child likes or adding something the child does not like can be a consequence; for example, taking away privileges, adding extra chores or work, taking away freedom (the child must stay at your side for a set time). Another possibility is removing whatever is causing the distraction; for example, toys or phone or going to bed earlier (if the cause is tiredness). But you will need to carefully and wisely determine what will be best for your unique child in your particular situation. The key is to act from a place of thoughtfulness and firm love, doing what will help that child most.
Yes, the suggestions are applicable for children with autism, but you will want to adjust each one to fit your child individually. For example, you probably won't be able to depend on eye contact as an indicator of whether he is paying attention to you. But become a student of your student, study him, get to know his unique indicators. (A great book that really encouraged me with my daughter who has autism and developmental delays is Uniquely Human by Barry Prizant.) The other thing to keep in mind is that it will most likely take longer to form a good habit than with a neurologically typical child. And you may need to focus on only one application of that habit at a time. For example, rather than focusing on attention 24 hours a day everywhere you go, you might want to start with paying attention in the house (or even in a certain room); then once that one area is showing progress, work on paying attention in the yard or in the car or at the park. Or perhaps you might want to start with attention before breakfast, then expand to all morning, then add bedtime, etc. Our autistic kids sometimes have trouble generalizing, so practicing and focusing on one application of the good habit at a time might be helpful.
I am having a major problem with this in my 13 year old. He'll be standing right by me and not hear all I say. Not complete a task because he wasn't listening all the way. What sort of opportunities do you suggest to work on this? He can tell back a story while reading but in communication he struggles.
Make sure you are not giving him a list of tasks to complete. When you get ready to ask him to complete a task, make sure he is looking at you and you at him. Give him the task and then make sure he knows what it is you asked of him.
@@SimplyCharlotteMason Thank you for your response. I am not sure that will solve the issue completely. But it may help. We will just be talking casually and he'll ask me the same question I answered already or not hear the whole thing I have said. He says he's trying to listen. Lol It's frustrating.
Hi! Thanks for this question! I'd love to direct you to this post by Sonya with Ginger Hubbard and Katy Morgan that gives incredible wisdom and advice on this topic of discipline and how to use consequences: simplycharlottemason.com/blog/6-discipline-mistakes-parents-make/ Let us know what you think and if you have more questions!
I am working on teaching my almost 3 year old the habit of attention. I really need some ideas for gentle consequences for a young child who wont pay attention.
Hi Angela, rather than focus on consequences for not paying attention, focusing on tools and games to help them pay attention is what we strive for in the early years. At 2 and 3, children are just beginning to develop the ability to pay attention. They are beginning to struggle with independence and self-will. Some ideas we utilize are playing games that require short bits of attention, teaching them a task and then after they have shown repeatedly that they can complete the task (setting the table, pick up a book, etc) let them know you that when you say "go" they need to complete the task but you are going to try to distract them. Make sure they know they must complete the task and not stop while you are trying to be distracting, making sure they repeat the request you just made (if they are verbal enough), giving a time limit to try to complete a task ("Let's see how many toys we can pick up during this one song."), etc. If you are playing a fun activity and they do not pay attention to directions ("You can play with play dough but you must not get it on the floor.") then you can tell them that it's time to put the said activity away since they did not carefully follow the directions you gave them.
How do you accomplish this when you have 4 young kids within 2 years of age that all need someone to walk them through things to get them done. Quickly encourage independence without getting bogged down with a large “blended” family of young ones.
Sounds like you have your hands full! One tip I would give is to focus on the oldest. The youngers usually watch the olders and follow their lead. So if you can get the olders on board, that might make your job easier. Don’t let the littles get away with things, but in those moments when you must choose where you will expend your energy, working with the older ones can be strategic. Eventually, you might be able to then pair an older with a younger to multiply your efforts.
This was excellent. Very Very helpful and useful. And I love listening to Mrs. Schaffer. Her voice is so calming and encouraging. Thank you!!
sorry to be so offtopic but does someone know a way to get back into an Instagram account??
I was stupid forgot my password. I would appreciate any tips you can give me
I really enjoy these kinds of videos. I wish I'd had this when my oldest was younger. Thank you so much for sharing your wisdom.
Side note: the book shelf in the background is gorgeous 😍 soooo cool!
Thank you!
Love the definition
Eyes ears heart
I know have a new personal goal as a mother. Thank you
This couldnt come at a more perfect time! I was *just* reading and reflecting on the sections in "Home Education" on the habits of attention and obedience! I especially loved Miss Mason's emphasis that a parent's emphasis on these habits must come from a place of wanting to help children do what is right!
Excellent points, both for piano and habits! Thank you Sonya for your perfectly-timed words of wisdom.
This is so helpful! Thank you. After the habit of giving your best effort could you do the habit of obedience? I know a lot of people struggle with it and see questions asked on facebook CM groups regarding obedience quite often.
The habits can be targeted in any order that you feel would best suit your family! Obedience is a challenging one, however it is foundational for so many things! Here are some other posts on helping you establish this habit.
Authority and Obedience: Core Values of Charlotte Mason
simplycharlottemason.com/blog/authority-and-obedience-core-values-of-charlotte-mason/
5 Ways to Work on the Habit of Obedience:
simplycharlottemason.com/blog/5-ways-to-work-on-the-habit-of-obedience/
I wash going to start with putting shoes away after getting in, but I think I will start with the habit of concentration first. It'll help with all other habits
These sound like great ideas! Sometimes when thinking through our next habit and even once we have started a habit it can become clear that an underlying habit that is necessary to be successful with the original target needs to be worked on first. It sounds like you have a great plan here! Come back and let us know how it goes and as always please reach out with any questions that you may have as you get started!
Today I just want to say THANK YOU AND GOD BLESS YOU. Simply Charlotte Mason has been a blessing, a rescue for me, a great help in the path of home education. I am really greatfull for all the knowledge, advices, and tons of information you generously share in order we (moms form different parts of the world) can understand Mrs. Masson´s ideas and be able to apply her wonderful method in our homeschool. Hugs from Chía -Colombia :)
This channel is germ not found yet by so many people. I also am pretty late to notice this lovely channel, but I learnt a lot as I chose to become a teacher and show great role model for my students. I want to rise and bring my students with me, so this channel assists me. Ocean thanks. Keep up the good work.
We are glad that these posts have inspired and helped you with your students!
My 4 year old is struggeling auth obedience lately, however I feel it's due to get lack of a good foundation of attentiveness. I watched this tonight hoping for ideas to help. I think you've given me great ideas to start with. Thank you
I'm curious what would be some good consequences for not paying attention?
It’s difficult, if not impossible, to give standard consequences that will be appropriate for every child in every situation. So much of that decision depends on the child’s personality, age, background, whether this is an ongoing issue or a single occurrence, attitude, and all of the circumstances involved. Usually, in general terms, taking away something the child likes or adding something the child does not like can be a consequence; for example, taking away privileges, adding extra chores or work, taking away freedom (the child must stay at your side for a set time). Another possibility is removing whatever is causing the distraction; for example, toys or phone or going to bed earlier (if the cause is tiredness). But you will need to carefully and wisely determine what will be best for your unique child in your particular situation. The key is to act from a place of thoughtfulness and firm love, doing what will help that child most.
Thank you for this awesome video! I was wondering if anyone had ideas for appropriate consequences for a four year old when not listening the first time. Thanks!
Perhaps narrowing down the habit of obedience in small pieces will help expose more natural consequences. This blog post gives ideas on how to do that: simplycharlottemason.com/blog/5-ways-to-work-on-the-habit-of-obedience/
@@SimplyCharlotteMason Thank you for taking the time to respond. I appreciate your channel very much.
"Get your steps in!" Well, I feel lazy now. I was considering walkie-talkies. 😜
All these tips apply for my special needs kids as well thank you Sonya!
Very helpful. Thank you.
This is really helpful. Starting with The Rails this week, and had decided to start with Attention, this is a great help as I plan our work, thank you.
This is just great parenting advice. Thank you!
I have enjoyed learning more about this topic! Could you make suggestions for age appropriate activities for attention and for consequences? It would be helpful to be able to look up a podcast on specific ages and how you would flesh it out for that age, so I could better understand what it looks like. Thank you!
Here is a series on habits with a Q&A as well as ideas for multiple scenarios that may be of interest to you as a starting point, such as, special needs, older children, multiple children, how to break bad habits, and more: simplycharlottemason.com/blog/habits-q-amp-a-consequences/
Your videos are so valuable, thank you!
Thank you so much for all the videos full with information! ❤️
Thank you. This will help me as we are working on moving towards the CM way of learning.
Thank you so much, this was so helpful !
Thank you very much for all the tips.. it is very good...may God bless you in abuncance..
Great advice! I can already think of several ways to use your ideas in our homeschool and our children's class at church.
This was soon good to re watch! Thanks for sharing these tips!
You're very welcome!
❤️❤️
Love the tips and wisdom you have shared with us! Thank you!
I completely agree.
Thank you for this.
Many thanks ❤️
I’ve been working on my own habit training, you have reminded me to kickstart one of them that I let go for a week while I was sick: keeping my room neat by straightening as I go and ensuing it is done before going to bed. Sigh, room cleaning today it is 😂
That's great and very helpful. Thank you very much
Great tips!
I love your videos! Which consequences do you suggest?!
It’s difficult, if not impossible, to give standard consequences that will be appropriate for every child in every situation. So much of that decision depends on the child’s personality, age, background, whether this is an ongoing issue or a single occurrence, attitude, and all of the circumstances involved. Usually, in general terms, taking away something the child likes or adding something the child does not like can be a consequence; for example, taking away privileges, adding extra chores or work, taking away freedom (the child must stay at your side for a set time). Another possibility is removing whatever is causing the distraction; for example, toys or phone or going to bed earlier (if the cause is tiredness). But you will need to carefully and wisely determine what will be best for your unique child in your particular situation. The key is to act from a place of thoughtfulness and firm love, doing what will help that child most.
Very helpful! Thank you:)
What are some consequences that would be considered in line with not listening the first time? I have a tendency to give too hard of a consequence and it kills his motivation.
It’s difficult, if not impossible, to give standard consequences that will be appropriate for every child in every situation. So much of that decision depends on the child’s personality, age, background, whether this is an ongoing issue or a single occurrence, attitude, and all of the circumstances involved. Usually, in general terms, taking away something the child likes or adding something the child does not like can be a consequence; for example, taking away privileges, adding extra chores or work, taking away freedom (the child must stay at your side for a set time). Another possibility is removing whatever is causing the distraction; for example, toys or phone or going to bed earlier (if the cause is tiredness). But you will need to carefully and wisely determine what will be best for your unique child in your particular situation. The key is to act from a place of thoughtfulness and firm love, doing what will help that child most.
What's a good limit on the electronics?
That decision is up to you to determine what is best for your family. I'd suggest watching this video we did on screen time: ua-cam.com/video/VzvSJNutPg0/v-deo.html
What might be a good consequence.
It has to hurt:D
It’s difficult, if not impossible, to give standard consequences that will be appropriate for every child in every situation. So much of that decision depends on the child’s personality, age, background, whether this is an ongoing issue or a single occurrence, attitude, and all of the circumstances involved. Usually, in general terms, taking away something the child likes or adding something the child does not like can be a consequence; for example, taking away privileges, adding extra chores or work, taking away freedom (the child must stay at your side for a set time). Another possibility is removing whatever is causing the distraction; for example, toys or phone or going to bed earlier (if the cause is tiredness). But you will need to carefully and wisely determine what will be best for your unique child in your particular situation. The key is to act from a place of thoughtfulness and firm love, doing what will help that child most.
@@SimplyCharlotteMason Thank you for the encouraging words.
"Putting down the 📱 or the potato peeler" - it's as if you're talking to me directly) Guilty as charged☹️
Same, girl. 😩
Hi, is this also applicable to kids with autism? I have a 5 yr old son with autism that really struggles with attention and obedience.
Yes, the suggestions are applicable for children with autism, but you will want to adjust each one to fit your child individually. For example, you probably won't be able to depend on eye contact as an indicator of whether he is paying attention to you. But become a student of your student, study him, get to know his unique indicators. (A great book that really encouraged me with my daughter who has autism and developmental delays is Uniquely Human by Barry Prizant.)
The other thing to keep in mind is that it will most likely take longer to form a good habit than with a neurologically typical child. And you may need to focus on only one application of that habit at a time. For example, rather than focusing on attention 24 hours a day everywhere you go, you might want to start with paying attention in the house (or even in a certain room); then once that one area is showing progress, work on paying attention in the yard or in the car or at the park. Or perhaps you might want to start with attention before breakfast, then expand to all morning, then add bedtime, etc. Our autistic kids sometimes have trouble generalizing, so practicing and focusing on one application of the good habit at a time might be helpful.
@@SimplyCharlotteMason thank you so much! This is helpful!
I am having a major problem with this in my 13 year old. He'll be standing right by me and not hear all I say. Not complete a task because he wasn't listening all the way. What sort of opportunities do you suggest to work on this? He can tell back a story while reading but in communication he struggles.
Make sure you are not giving him a list of tasks to complete. When you get ready to ask him to complete a task, make sure he is looking at you and you at him. Give him the task and then make sure he knows what it is you asked of him.
@@SimplyCharlotteMason Thank you for your response. I am not sure that will solve the issue completely. But it may help. We will just be talking casually and he'll ask me the same question I answered already or not hear the whole thing I have said. He says he's trying to listen. Lol It's frustrating.
What do you think some appropriate consequences would be for a 6 year old?
Hi! Thanks for this question! I'd love to direct you to this post by Sonya with Ginger Hubbard and Katy Morgan that gives incredible wisdom and advice on this topic of discipline and how to use consequences:
simplycharlottemason.com/blog/6-discipline-mistakes-parents-make/
Let us know what you think and if you have more questions!
I am working on teaching my almost 3 year old the habit of attention. I really need some ideas for gentle consequences for a young child who wont pay attention.
Hi Angela, rather than focus on consequences for not paying attention, focusing on tools and games to help them pay attention is what we strive for in the early years. At 2 and 3, children are just beginning to develop the ability to pay attention. They are beginning to struggle with independence and self-will. Some ideas we utilize are playing games that require short bits of attention, teaching them a task and then after they have shown repeatedly that they can complete the task (setting the table, pick up a book, etc) let them know you that when you say "go" they need to complete the task but you are going to try to distract them. Make sure they know they must complete the task and not stop while you are trying to be distracting, making sure they repeat the request you just made (if they are verbal enough), giving a time limit to try to complete a task ("Let's see how many toys we can pick up during this one song."), etc. If you are playing a fun activity and they do not pay attention to directions ("You can play with play dough but you must not get it on the floor.") then you can tell them that it's time to put the said activity away since they did not carefully follow the directions you gave them.
How do you accomplish this when you have 4 young kids within 2 years of age that all need someone to walk them through things to get them done. Quickly encourage independence without getting bogged down with a large “blended” family of young ones.
Sounds like you have your hands full! One tip I would give is to focus on the oldest. The youngers usually watch the olders and follow their lead. So if you can get the olders on board, that might make your job easier. Don’t let the littles get away with things, but in those moments when you must choose where you will expend your energy, working with the older ones can be strategic. Eventually, you might be able to then pair an older with a younger to multiply your efforts.
Simply Charlotte Mason great advice thank you!!!