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"Christian" Goes on Jubilee to Decide THIS, Should I Come Out to My Wife?
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- Опубліковано 21 вер 2022
- "Christian" Goes on Jubilee to Decide THIS, Should I Come Out to My Wife? @jubilee Reaction
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This situation is a mess! He needs to tell his wife and seek Godly counseling regardless of the outcome! This man needs deliverance 🙏🏾💯
He needs repentance not deliverance.
Both
He's living in agony. He's hiding,living a lie. He should not"come out" He should go where he can receive LOVING Godly counsel. The spirits need to be broken off. He needs to choose either GODs will or his own. If he has a partner & is sexually active in another relationship other than his wife,its adultry. It's Not fair to her. Its vey clear in scripture what GOD says about this. We don't get to choose to have thigs our way. He & his wife are unequally yoked. You can not intentionally choose to live in sin & be a Christian.
A Christian is a follower of Christ. GOD please help this man.
Yeees. U said it best!
Exactly
I have three enormous problems with the Jubilee video.
1) The strangers are not qualified to offer this council. They aren't therapists, counselors, church leaders, close family and friends, etc. They are STRANGERS.
2) The advice was inherently manipulative. The entire scenario was set up as "how do I reject and destroy my marriage, my community, and my relationship with God and feel good about myself and come out as the hero?" When they said that the wife should be "loving and patient" because she is a Christian is extremely manipulative, because when (not if, WHEN) she responds negatively he can demonize her as not a real Christian.
3) There was NO real support offered. These people didn't offer to help him find work, housing, a new community, etc. They gave him the detonator to blow up his life, encouraged him to press it, and walked away without offering to lift a finger to help him through the aftermath. But they got to say that they support and accept him. No, they don't.
They lacked wisdom indeed.
Stop trolling
Let’s not examine the wreckage this selfish person created leaving his family? Marrying his wife to “cure” him? Where is support & counseling for the TRUE victims in this???? You ppl are all alike!
@@TradMommy you're right. There was no support for the true victims. And there won't be, unfortunately. Our culture has placed LGBT+ people on such a pedestal that they can do no wrong and if anyone gets hurt it's framed as their fault. It's despicable. But that point doesn't invalidate the points I made originally.
@@sage. ummm it kinda does bc the lgbtqi person started the ball rolling w a MAJOR lie & using another for selfish, secretive means & further putting his victim in danger by engaging in sexual activity that is high risk to say the very least. This is completely evil. He’s NO victim. The team that interviewed him kept his identity secure & it was obviously his choice to do so. I’m tired of these ppl getting far more sympathy & services than the poor ppl & innocent children they leave in their wake of destructive personality types. It’s not just lgbtqi either that I’m referring to. We live in a narcissistic, fallen & “it’s all about me & “ living my truth” world. Enough.
my ex married me thinking I would make him "normal" he was transgendered but didn't tell me till yr 20 of marriage after leaving his family yr 19. he left 3 boys behind. He destroyed us all.
God bless you I pray for your family amen ✝️🙏
You’re not destroyed. I thought the same after my divorce who cheated on me & turned my children against me. It took a lot of crying & depression to finally see that I was being separated from him. I would’ve never left him & turned to God. Sometimes things have to fall apart to be put back together by our Father. I’m so sorry this happened to you & those dear boys. Your Father is still in control. He’s got this…let Him have it. Turn it over. Im praying Faye. You’re stronger than you know through the blood of Jesus Christ.
Who are you to them how lot feel 🤬
Sounds like autogynephilia... they used to call this heterosexual transvestitism and most practitioners balanced their kink with heterosexual family life, current situation is not progress....
I can’t imagine how that must feel for everyone involved. I believe it’s Mormons who tell gay people to marry so they aren’t tempted to “partake in the lifestyle.”
Idk what the solution should’ve been but I hope everyone is healing
I could never be my authentic self. That person is a raging alcoholic and causes emotional turmoil in her marriage 😂
Authentic self really does seem to just mean "Disregard everyone else in your life and do what you want"
Love the verbiage “worshipping at the altar of authentic self”…as you said forgetting loving sacrificially… but what can we expect of non believers, apparently they don’t know Jesus calls us to deny ourselves when we follow him.
Why not be yourself?
@@dansaber4427 Because our natural self is innately sinful. To enter the kingdom of heaven all of us must be born again. This is what Jesus died for.
@@Anne_one amen!
@@LeslieFlemons Take the scales of Good and Evil off your eyes sister and see! Then you can be reconciled with the father. Are you up to the standards you're judging the world with? Jesus Will judge you by that measure. That's called grace. Jesus Paid God's Wrath with his blood now all judgment has been given to the son. Jesus Cuts Hypocrites in half and throws them into the fire. That's called justice. This is the knowledge of the truth: that the knowledge of Good and Evil is death. Not life. Therefore repent or you're not going to eat from the Tree of Life
@@dansaber4427 sister
I moved to the United States when I married my husband. While I am legally in the States, I do not have the legal authorization to work yet.
I am also visibly pregnant so not likely to get a job in my field if employers see that.
My husband is therefore the sole provider.
If my husband was to just abandon me, I would be a pregnant homeless person unless I move back to one of the most dangerous countries in the world right now.
I feel that when you get married, you take on a responsibility. You make promises. You make someone become vulnerable because in a partnership, they will rely on you for some things. They will make decisions (getting pregnant, moving countries) based on promises you made.
You do not have a right to destroy someone else to be your "authentic self".
I thought it was sad that he felt he had no support in the church to confess his struggle. No Christian should feel that way and I pray that we all are able to find and discern communities we feel safe in.
But also, I pray that this man tell his wife because if his faith is most important and he reads the Bible, it says to confess ur sins to one another. So praying for this guy, hope he experiences revival 💪🏽
Absolute bars at the end 🙏🙏🙏 Lay down your life for your wife in the same way Christ laid down His for the Church
This is so selfish man.. When you take a step back, this is pure selfishness :(. He got married to “cure” his same sex attraction.. that’s not right at all 😢
Not to mention deceitful. His wife had the right know about this before the wedding; and to choose whether or not to she wanted to live with this issue for the rest of her life.
Anyone who substitutes "my truth" for THE TRUTH, is purely selfish. Disney has turned an entire generation into selfish brats.
As stupid as he is, it's his religion that made him feel like he can cure it.
Christianity doesn't reall have much to offer him... try to live as a straight person or total abstinence... not very appealing for sane people.
i think it would be okay if he was honest about it. i have similar issues but i dont date women. i tell the men i have been with though. its a horrible situation so i applaud him trying to leave the sin but at the same time lying is also a sin and a really bad one for relationships too.
My spouse and I are going on 20 years of marriage. There have been MANY times throughout the years we have each had to crucify our flesh, and remember we made a covenant before God for life. I think the more in love with GOD I fall, the easier it gets to live a life that isn’t just about me and my desires. I love others and consider them above myself more than I used to. I think it’s hard for this younger generation because many of the voices around them are telling them that they (you) and living your truth and being your authentic self… it’s all that matters. Do you boo, no matter what destruction you leave in your wake. It’s sad.
As a young dude, I want this. I want to love someone and serve her. It's getting pretty hard though. You are kind of right. Even in Christian communities, people don't really think it's about self-sacrifice and holiness. Young Christianity is very me-centered.
His wife can support him by "identifying herself" as a man. Seems like the best worldly choice in this case.😪😪😪
But all jokes aside, he should stop lying or stop calling himself a Christian. This is so hurtfull for his wife and he's not laying down his life for his wife, he's lying to his wife , there's no virtue in that.
Yeah, stop calling himself a Christian is a stretch!!
I don’t think he needs to stop calling himself a Christian. He needs to be taught to die to himself and stop hiding in shame because that shame is what makes us hide from God instead of going and being honest and going to a pastor/priest and getting the help you need to keep walking the path of Christ
@@gracetruthfreedom5068 if you're following your desires and not God's then you practically have no business calling yourself this.
Repent and ask God for help.
@@LovelyLadyLissett Because Christ calls us to repent of our sins? We all should be crucifying our flesh, as followers of Christ, not proudly living in sin.
I thought the marriage would change me. Only God can change us. Please, Lord, keep our eyes on You!
The guy said he has a relationship with Jesus. And Jesus comes before everything.
I’m wondering if he prayed and asked the LORD for direction or is he skipping the direction of Holy Spirit to find validation from others that will help him do what he really want to do…come out as gay and live a homosexual lifestyle.
I think Ruslan makes a really good point about the marriage commitment being important. You've committed yourself to this woman even if your sexual orientation doesn't line up with who you're married to. If we are trying to live in accordance with Christian values, it is important that we are truthful in what we say especially when we vow to be with someone for the rest of your life. You can't go back on your word so easily.
Unfortunately that argument didn't seem to be touched on in the Jubilee video.
If you or Ruslan were in his shoes,you wouldn't be saying this so it's completely obvious you aren't
Awesome discussion! Love this statement: “Love is an action not an attraction.”❤
It's sad because a lot of people go through this all because of (internalized) homophobia.
If he means coming out and leaving her to lead a homosexual lifestyle, he needs to do that and file for divorce. Free her..
If he’s telling her in order to help carry and walk through this and CHOOSING to be obedient and live holy.. He should still tell her and I believe she should walk with him through it.. Counseling, honestly and transparency is REQUIRED!!!
Christian counseling yes. Tell her no. Your battle with sin doesn’t need to be her battle with your sin.
@@jacobortega2786 if marriage is the act of becoming one and we are to help carry each others burdens. Then yes he should tell her. No one has to struggle alone.
@@Jkila25 I don’t believe that includes harmful provocations (in the sense of struggles with homosexual thoughts) or past sins. That’s why I said yes to the Christian counseling.
@@jacobortega2786 it should include every provocation. They are married. The vows taken are for every part of life.
@@jacobortega2786 doesn't she deserve to know why he's not interested in her sexually?
As woman I could not stay with someone who tell me he is gay or has same sex attraction whether we had children or not. Everyone is thinking about him what about his wife and the true is he start his marriage dishonest. …I know I could never trust him. I guess I will stay in the minority on this.
I completely get that. But wouldn't that fall under the "for worse" in the marriage vows? As a Christian I am unsure (assuming he hasn't cheated) if this is a biblical reason for divorce.
A man with bisexual tendencies can still be faithful.
There’s entire communities of divorced spouses who were left by same-sex attracted partners that are seeking support because their partner who left gets all this praise and worship being their authentic selves while, despite being supportive, they're just left to be happy about it or shut up sadly.
I had a Christian College and later Seminary friend that got married came out after he had an affair and left his wife for the boyfriend. It was devastating to her and her family and the entire community. He had to resign from his church and ended up going off the deep end with the partying and going out, to the point that he was missing classes at Seminary. His wife was depressed and suicidal over it but he was annoyed that he wasn't embraced. The way he did it damaged so many people. I told him at the time what I saw had nothing to do with him being gay and everything with him so focused on self and vanity to the point that he was no longer an example of Christ's love but more like a narcissist. Our dean of the Seminary asked him to drop out, not for his choice but because he was failing out from missing all of his classes due to late night partying. He ended up turning into such a self absorbed monster that his boyfriend broke up with him. We lost touch but I stayed friends with his circle of friends and are still friends to this day. We were able to talk over the years about how he went about coming out the entirely wrong way and hurt everyone in his path. I was able to tell them the truth about him failing out of Seminary and dropping out versus what he had said of being kicked out of being gay. He would have done better to talk to his wife and undergo counseling. (A phycologist & professor at our Seminary even offered him counseling but he declined.)
Wow your story blows my mind. I hope that he goes back to Christ!
@@LeslieFlemons nope and that was over 20 years ago. His family has taken him back in but even his gay friends from seminary dropped him because he was so self-absorbed and insufferable
If, he, is still breathing... There is still hope for him to be redeemed. Keep praying for your friend mate.
Well, a gay man shouldn't be a pastor, period!
Wow that’s a lot to deal with
My husband had no tendencies but I still asked him before we got married. I told him why I wanted to know. It's sad we have to ask but we do.
I’ve never seen Ruslan get so worked up, but I like the passion. Haha. Keep speaking truth in love, brother.
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 I was cracking up
Why marry someone that you know you're not attracted to and why hurt your spouse in the first place? I don't understand these people.
He says it…
Religion
Ruslan at 15:15 Facts 🤣 say it again this would have never been a decision, before becoming a Christian I "identified" as bi sexual female and it wasn't fun dating woah thank you Lord from removing that confusion, he needs to fast and pray a long one then weekly give perversion a fight 🙏🏽
And if that doesn't work,he should be celibate because that's the only solution y'all give
@jefferson hassan we give? You mean the Scriptures and if you seek God you will find Him That's a promise from the Lord. Fasting and prayer breaks chains/addictions/desires that add up with God and the Lord will give you freedom but you have to be tired of sin and love God more
@@freedbychrist2156 no it doesn't because I also went through it
I feel for the dude? No. I only feel for the poor wife who is being deceived. She deserves the truth.
But did you even ask yourself why he did it?
He wants to come out because he wants to be with a man. It's just a matter of when. We honestly can't think he is just going to come out as gay/bi and not want to satisfy that urge.
Yikes
If that’s the case, should he not come out at all?
I hope he didn't leave his BEST FRIEND to chase after some D. Grass isn't greener bro. God have Mercy 🥺 🙏
I know of someone who divorced her wife to live a christ centered life and she had people telling her that she was wrong and not living her true life. I guess when it comes to same sex attraction your only choice is to live the life according to society. So I can see how it's hard when society is telling you that what they are trying to abstain from is the only way.
Thank you Ruslan 👏🏽
This situation is problematic on many levels. As a follower of Christ I would absolutely tell him to to confess and repent, or pray and ask God to give him strength through his temptation.
Secondarily, these instances often put people potentially in harmful outcomes. If the person cheats ( the down-low lifestyle) sexually transmitted diseases are a risk, children are involved and their mental and spiritual health is at risk.
This stuff is wild, people need the Lord.
We need to find ourselves less and find Him more.
This question is above my pay grade. I didn’t know what to get from the vending machine
😂😂😂😂
People discuss this as if Christians are rampantly going around committing violence against gay people. It's just not true, at least here in the US. We can easily call this out in the Middle East. How many opportunities exist for this to happen and how little it actually does happen is astounding. Also, If it did occur on a large scale the news would publish it front and center all day long.
I agree with you 100%. I personally don’t believe any one can “be gay” as an identity as opposed to it being a symptom of sin. We are called to self sacrificial love to our wives, compared to Christ on the cross. I think denying yourself homosexual acts is minuscule in comparison.
I don't know if that's 100% what's being said here. Perhaps Ruslan agrees with you that "being gay" is a symptom of sin. But what seems to be more important in this case is that "knowing" you're gay before making a life-long commitment to someone, then revealing your gayness to your partner after that commitment is a sin. You're betraying that commitment to the person.
It's 2 different arguments.
@@valerianrabello but if he never cheated then did he sin? It really just thoughts at that moment.
@@alexika9981 I mean, biblically, yes, even if you hate your brother, you have committed sin. So in that case, it's the thought that matters. That's still not to say whether gayness is a sin or not
@@valerianrabello see that’s when you take literary devices verbatim. If you seen any attracted person and thought lustfully then you sinned to. That can be up to interpretation, but it’s more of the message being sent then a literal understanding.
Idek what gayness is. That’s funny term.
I completely agree. Stay with her, and tell her the truth. I also think he'll be much happier staying in the covenant he committed to, which reflects THE truth of Christ's love for the church.
I also want to add that Zach described my life perfectly between 17:00-18:00. I used to be much more forthright about it early on when meeting new people but now I'm growing to savor the discipline of keeping quiet about it. From now on I want to be known for at least 5-10 other worthier things before I spill the beans.
Will SHE want to stay? That’s the question
You could sleep with men?
Love how you said, "Lay down your life for your wife." He owes her an apology for not being honest in the first place. AND what's the difference? What if he was attracted to another woman? He could say the urge is strong but as Christians we are to live out 2 Corinthians 10:5 > fight it because you love God. Fight it because you love your wife and children! Gods Holy Word is very clear on how God feels about sin and what sin is. Roman's 1:36-32
I think if he's engaging in out of marriage $8x she should get a divorce.
Even under biblical standards, she has every right to divorce him.
@@Kevin-lw2gl that’s if he is cheating.
@@alexika9981 that's correct.
This was really crazy with to watch first of all & hear other Christians talk about this. Ruslan you made really great points. First of all it was just a horrible idea for this man to even come to Jubilee and ask strangers for advice when obviously it is from a worldly perspective. I hope this this guy really get some help and he lets God speak & convict him from his struggles. Even though he’s mention “my relationship with Christ is the most part to me & my wife is important to me” but just looking at it it’s more like he’s being more selfish more about thinking about how it’s going to affect his own interest than others around him. I’m glad he’s taking to consideration about his wife. He straight up lied to his wife before getting married & didn’t be honest with her which is very messed up. Lord help this man for he does not know what he is doing.
EESH... but what about the wife.. I mean would you want to be married to someone that you KNEW was same sex attracted and was just faking his attraction to you or didn't really want you ? its a tough one....
"How do I leave my wife and hook up with gay men without a guilty conscience" is the question.
I get the sense that he wants to come out to his wife, so he can feel free to engage in same sex relationships. I sense that he's going to have these relationships whether he tells his wife or not.
I totally agree with Ruslan here, but I don't feel he has the capacity or maturity to stay in his marriage, manage his same sex attractions and keep his marriage a happy and thriving space.
This a disaster, from top top to toe. But the great thing is, God does his best work with disasters. This could be a great restorative story if this man let's God take the wheel, overwise adultery, divorce or both is imminent.
I've been waiting, for this all day! Lol
When we take our sin as our identity we cannot escape it. If I’m “Gay” I hold no responsibility because it’s just how I am. If I struggle with homosexual temptations then I can go to God for support in being delivered from sin.
See I 1000% agree with Ruslan here as I often don’t to this extent. If y’all check the aba and preach comments I was fighting for my life trying to convey this message. If she doesn’t have a clue then they are probably having sex and if that’s the case the automatic conclusion isn’t divorce. However I’m curious to know what your commentary would be on the wife’s reaction and what she should do. Thanks for the video.
These people telling this man to sacrifice his entire faith, community and family just so that he can mess around with men is CRAZY TO ME.
He doesn’t have sacrifice his faith, community or family. He can still be there for them.
@@dolphina3794 what does that mean? He’ll lose his job if he’s deciding to cheat on his wife. His wife will leave because he’s cheating, is community will Ostracize him because of his actions. Who would he be there for?
They said his relationship with God will be fine
He’ll be divorcing which God hates
And he’ll be gay which God hates
And to make it worse he’ll be proud of doing something that God hates and God will be okay with that?
I wonder what his relationship with God is because I know a true Christian would go on a retreat and wait in God for a solution and not talk to total strangers about it
He doesn’t care about what God thinks about it
He’s been religious for a very long time hence doesn’t really consider what God wants.
I've talked to a gay gentleman who was once married to a woman and he explained that he was living a lie during his marriage. He wanted to be able to climb the corporate ladder and be successful. Being married was expected in his social setting.
I don't believe this gentleman or the person I spoke to was bisexual.
He is lying to himself, his wife and everyone else in order to play the role of a Christian family man.
There is one form of sexuality but there are many forms of perversion. It isn’t his sexuality it’s his perversion
As a married woman I feel if this man is engaging with men then he should divorce. If his attraction is taking away from his attraction to his wife that is also unfair to her. So if he is just all in his head about men and doesn’t really want to touch his wife that can be hard for her. I couldn’t stay if my husband came out to me. I would be disgusting and that just my honest opinion especially if he was cheating with a man. I would not want to hurt him because of it though. I would just be very hurt and done. I think he is just very selfish because he should have told her up front. That’s not ok.
Ahh...what about his wife's sexual health. If he doesn't come out, he could put her life in danger. Look at the numbers of married woman who have unfortunately contracted a terminal illness because their husband's were gay. He should never gotten married in the first place.
That’s assuming he’s sleeping around. Nothing about this implied he has. Perhaps im giving him the benefit of doubt and you’re right.
I have a few points and I sorta don't think this guy's actually gay. I think he's a catalyst for the group's thinking and responses to this situation.
Also, bisexuality in women does seem to be more accepted than it is in men (imo) but I do agree that it's irresponsible to not give your marriage partner this information prior to courting, dating, marrying, comitting, and having children with this person.
He said he did it so that he thought he would be straight. I know this to be a thing. People aren't secured in their sexuality so I think having sex or committing to someone of the opposite sex might persuade them into heterosexuality only to find out that it didn't and that their struggle still persist.
Mind you, there's no studies to help people understand their sexual confusion. There's just the popular opinion to embrace whatever alternative feelings if you feel it; not to challenge them, understand; or control them for the sake of another person.
That’s the problem, what are the resources people should us to figure this out. It can’t be left to just feels 😂. There are a few people but they have been silenced as reparative therapy is damaging while at the same time Mental heath is important. I can’t think of a more powerful tool to this psychological struggle than a psychological recourses like focused therapy.
you just dropped some crazy truth Ruslan. thanks man. i love the mind blowing truth. thank you God!
At the end, the dude sounded more reasonable than all of them. This does not automatically mean it's a divorce, as he seemed to insinuate in his decision to say "No."
Is no one thinking of the WIFE here? This jerk has been LYING and DECEIVING this woman from DAY ONE, and he has stolen from HER the ability to have a NORMAL relationship and be married to someone that is genuinely attracted to her and wants and loves her the way a STRAIGHT man and woman should be. Wow! I would be LIVID!!! And no, the selfish thing was this guy MARRYING FALSELY in the FIRST place. She needs a divorce…ASAP!
Being a Christian is learning to die to self. Die to self. The joy will come from obeying the Lord, restored marriage!
He shouldn't throw away his marriage over the attractive girl next door, but knowing he liked dudes and still married a woman means he prefers to be with someone else and isn't truly in love with her. So is it fair to her that he stays even tho he's not truly in love and would prefer someone else and would be happier with someone else? Basically if he stays married he's giving up his happiness just to do what others tell him he thinks he should do.
A straight man wouldn't understand cuz they're already attracted to women, so it's easy for them to say just stay. But it's not fair to the wife cuz he's hiding this truth from her. I wouldn't want to he with someone if they just settled for me and would prefer someone else. He's just settling.
If I was his wife I would want to know, if I was anybody's wife and I found out that my husband was not heterosexual I would want to know and be freed from that marriage because everything at that point has been built on a lie. Not only did he lie from the beginning he also has no plans to remain faithful to her as it remains to his sexuality. He's going to continue to keep lying and saying that he feels pleasure when he does not, he's going to continue to keep lying and saying that he loves his life and his children when he truly doesn't love his life because he can't be who he's already identified he's going to be. Their vows and Covenant to each other was broken the moment that he married her and did not disclose the truth to her so, therefore his Covenant was a false Covenant and his vows were false vows so with that being said she should rightfully be removed from the marriage so that she can move on and find a good holy Christian man who is living by God's word. This situation is not about the husband at this point it is now about the wife who should know the truth and should be able to live in a truthful marriage instead of everyone else on the outside knowing that their marriage is a lie.
I am not sure if that is a biblical reason for divorce. Unless a person is giving in to those feelings and cheating, then I am not sure you can/should get divorced. It would obviously be insanely hard.
Should he come out: I think you can talk to your wife for prayer depending on how she is with her own faith. But I agree, there’s a difference saying you’re gay and that’s your identity vs saying you’re struggling. Also go to a pastor.
Yes he needs to be honest with his wife if he truly loves her. It's going to hurt but it's for the best.
I think what I would have liked to know is what does he want to come out of this. Does he want to stay married but just be honest with his wife that he is also attracted to men. Or is saying he isn’t attracted to his wife at all, been faking it, wants a divorce and wants to pursue men.
I think it’s perfectly fine to admit he’s attracted to men, to divorce and pursue men is where it will conflict with the faith he claims.
Be honest, God already knows, but we are still called to die to self and remain faithful. And the Holy Spirit will help with that.
But I understand if he’s in a rural Christian community, that can get real messy if there’s a lack of love, understanding, and tolerance. Unfortunately it be like that out there so it’s a little complex.
We need some real God fearing Christians on that show! It seems like they care more about their truth and their emotions rather than caring about God. Their lives revolve around how they feel not how God feels! Lean on Gods understanding not your own ours is evil!
Great reaction!
If my husband comes out as gay, he can ✌️🚶♂️..I’m good, I can’t do it.
Married people that are committed and are attracted to ANYONE for any reason. They need to be honest with the person he committed too. She married him on false pretenses. Christians join as one, pray and work thru it.
He should stay married gay is sexual attraction not who you are you don’t have to act on your desires
This has to be the last days...lovers of self...everyone worshipping themselves & own truth/identity/sexuality & God tells us to love Him above all else and to deny ourselves...dark times
I've seen this situation first hand. A man marrying a woman because he believes that he can deny his sexuality and be happy with a woman. Often his church has taught him that. It doesn't work. Causes a lot of pain for all involved. But in many churches there is no place for gay people. They are rejected and outcast. They didn't choose their sexuality and often are forced to keep quiet about it or face rejection from their church.
Exactly!
It is still a sin to give in to the desire of your flesh if you are gay. But churches should definitely love and support people who are struggling with same-sex attraction and are committed to denying themselves.
This world encourages selfishness. A persons word doesn’t mean anything anymore. The bible says to know what is the right thing to do and to not do it is sin. Also we should keep our word even if it hurts to do it. God is going to hold us accountable for every vain word we say. I hope he chooses to trust in Jesus to help him endure and stay married. May Jesus help his faith and actions to bring deliverance to his life concerning the same sex attraction.
Did he say he was Christian or are we assuming? (9:44)- I don't think he has to suppress his feelings, but has to address them with help from the Lord. He needs to find and organization he can trust to be open with (Focus on the Family has a prayer hotline, and can refer him to others).
I wouldn't want to stay married to a gay man...if my husband came out to me as gay that trust would be broken because his been living a lie all these years.
I have to say that a lot of men, especially men in the church, marry women already knowing that they don’t like it but do it anyway for the pressure of society, family, and the church as well. And later, have men on the side as a scape for their “problem”. I am from Brazil, and listening to a lot of podcasts from pastors who answer their audience, one of the main problems is a gay man getting married to a woman and later having affairs with another man. Some women call and report the fact, but a big group is of them men themselves calling and sharing their struggles, fears, some got a disease, etc…
It sucks! I am not agreeing with all that, I am just relating the facts. Some countries are not as “free” as America. Maybe, that's why Ruslan doesn't understand how could he marry her and lie for a whole.
***
Also, would she want to keep married to him?
I probably would not want him after that revelation. :( 😢
@ruslan you should have me on. I am a current worship leader. I struggled with much. Not this exactly but a lot as a married man for 20+ years who dealt with possible divorce 3 different times 5 kids. I love your channel and appreciate your thoughts lining up with truth
We have a lot of self centered people in this world man… dang
😬😬😬these are not such good advices. Why not be honest and work on still following Christ. I wish he had a church where he felt safe to discuss these struggles so they can have people in his corner to help him pursue Christ. You can struggle with same sex attraction yet still choose Him. Who’s to say she wouldn’t want to help also. Yes she’d be hurt but a marriage is so much more than what the world makes it out to be. I fully agree Rus😩😩I put this one off because this was tough for me
He didn't fake it. He tried it!
2nd; I don't understand the theology of women saving men. Get married and I'll get straight. Eye roll!
3rd; are any of these people married?
I hated how no one bothers to vouch for his wife and considered what it would do to her. And the fact that this situation could be redeemed and divorce isn't the answer. The Christians in the show didn't even say to stay with her and fight. Geez Louise
In Christ, there can be redemption. Plenty of testimonies that prove it. Yet, from the Jubilee video he's more concerned with being his true self as gay than protecting his wife.
@@joellebrinkley1521 lol many more people come out from faking being straight than those testimonies you speak of. So chance of it working is slim af
So he loves his wife, he has a job, friends but he's willing to throw that all away for essentially his happiness.
Lmao read that again, you probably didn't word that the way you wanted
I agree what u said Ruse! And the analogy you used
How the hell did they even found about this guy 😂 to come on this show
1:44 1.) 'Coming out of the closet' is a much older and more well-known phrase
2.) 'Struggling with same-sex attraction' is a Christianese that is more recent and niche, especially amongst Evangelical communities. It isn't a common phrase in a lot of Christian circles, until very recently.
So ofcourse the average person out of the loop (even if they are a Sunday Christian who switches off their brain on Sundays) would call it 'Coming Out' instead of 'Struggling With same-sex attraction'.
Let’s put it this way. If I’m married to a woman who I’m not very attractive to because she gained weight for example, and I see a beautiful woman, do I have the right to say that I need to tell her I’m not attracted to her but I’m attracted to the beautiful girl? It doesn’t make sense, I get same sex attraction is unique but that doesn’t give anyone the excuse to just act on their desires. If a married man can’t even look at another woman with lust, then why does he get to leave his wife to pursue men? Praying for this brother I know it’s a hard situation and he genuinely seems torn.
Exactly he doesn’t get to pursue that righteously. You think he should tell her?
@@alexika9981 you know I think he should tell her whats going on and get help with it. However he has to say this is what I am struggling with but I don't want to live this way. The way he is saying is that I AM gay. big difference
@@christianhanson700 I agree
No matter what he should be honest with his wife. And the decision after that should be left up to her. If it was me, we'd be getting a divorce. If you're attracted to the same sex but you want to follow Christ, the best option is to stay single and celibate.
That’s not biblical but I also don’t condone him hiding his feelings from her. At the end if he never cheated what moral code has he broken?
There’s other purposes to marriage like legacy, family, mission, bringing in new disciples etc. Youre perpetuating the idea that no women would ever agree to marry a guy whose has same sex attractions and it happens all of the time.
The best thing he should have done was tell her before and if they still wanted to date, they cools stil have a thriving happy, godly marriage.
@@alexika9981 their relationship was built on a lie from the beginning. It's not fair to her. I would not want to be married to a man that's attracted to men. The decision should be left up to her. Some women don't want to be with a man that's attracted to men.
I think if he’s already acting out these desires he should tell her because he’s putting her health at risk by exposing her to potential diseases
If he’s already acting… he needs to separate from his wife immediately. Deal with his sin and God and then return to her.
My cousin was married to a woman for over 10 years, had 2 kids, started to have affairs, they were with men, now "married" to a man who also once had a wife and kids. :/ The kids of both men are messed up now. Really sad situation. Following the god of my truth is a real thing. Super selfish.
I’ve known at least 6 men personally. One guy was trying to serve at our church up front like be on stage and preach I brought up some red flags as was very opposed .. maybe a year later he left his wife and 5 kids to be with a man 😢
I didn't quite understand what Ruslan meant when he said reverse the roles 🤔
Well at the same token, anyone claiming to follow Christ that is gay isn't a real Christian.
This is common in general. I grew up in the JW Org and this was common! And when they are exposed some of them have committed suicide!
What is the point of coming out? If it is to pursue this lifestyle then no, don't come out. If it is to deal with the sin then okay, share with the wife. But it is an absolute no to divorce.
Btw, this guy is NOT gay. He is struggling with sin. What he is is a sinner just like everybody else. Claiming a sin as an identity is a problem then you can't defeat it. Repudiate the sin. Don't identify with it.
This feels exploitative. If I worked at Jubilee and I had the choice to produce something like this, I would have advised Jacob to work this out privately. Forget the views. Forget the likes. Someone should have cared about him and his wife enough, even though we can't see his face.
This is intensely personal and I feel horrible that now everyone knows about it. Not everyone needs to know our deepest, darkest secrets. Our struggles should be brought to God and EXTREMELY trustworthy confidantes and counselors.
UA-cam ain't the place where you'll find the grace needed to walk through stuff like this.
Jubilee isn't Dr Phil,his face wasn't shown so two different things
This man went on Jubilee looking for affirmation of his sexuality instead of seeking God for what God’s desire is for his sexuality. Sometimes God’s will is not what our flesh wants, that’s when people decide to do what they want to do, but realize when you directly ignore God’s will you change your relationship with God to where you have chosen to ignore his will for you. You destroy many when you function outside the will of God. Our culture promotes self to the degree where it is “do what thou wilt” (the actual satanists mantra) which is do what you want to do at all times aka obey your flesh. Hopefully the counselor he has sought is spirit filled and encourages him to pursue Christ over his own fleshly pleasures.
Wow @7:22 "I don't care what the old testament says!!".
Translation: I'm smarter that God. I'd make a better lawmaker than Jesus.
Out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaketh
"I don't care what the old testament says!!"
As someone who is a trans guy and bi I was pleasantly surprised I didn't completely disagree with Ruslan. I really expected this to be him talking about the guy being gay was selfish instead of saying leaving his whole community behind and commitments, especially his kids, would be selfish. I completely agree with this view point.
He needs to be honest with his wife. He needs to seek healing
@Ruslan, I know you love reading, so please check out a book called Embodied by Preston Sprinkle. Very interesting book to speak about this topic. Since the writer made some thorough research about the subject theologically and Homosexuality itself. Might be an awesome podcast to have Preston on your show
Why does no one seem to think they should have to sacrifice anything to follow Jesus?? We are told to count the cost! I was an addict. I have to deny myself drugs daily! Why aren’t they expected to do the same? Just saying. They are exempt? Show me that scripture
Bra 15:00 Ru turned up no cap!!!🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾🔥🔥🔥
Bro Zach get on my nerves🤣🤣🤣🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾🔥🔥
Anybody who intentionally causes physical harm to ho mo sexuals is not a follower of Christ, but anybody who tells sod omites sweet nothings and tells them they can be Christian or get into heaven while doing what they do, is also not a follower of Christ!
About the Kingdom, the Bible says "And there shall in no wise enter into it any thing that defileth, neither whatsoever worketh *abomination*, or maketh a lie: but they which are written in the Lamb's book of life." (Revelation 21:27).
About Sodomy, the Bible says "You shall not lie with a MALE as with a woman; it is an *abomination*" (Leviticus 18:22). What about, "Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice *homosexuality*" (1 Corinthians 6:9).
So no sod omite or hom osexual is getting into Heaven, and theyre seen as abominations by YHWH! They need to repent and start a family regardless of what they feel. As well as refrain from succumbing to their temptations. We are instructed to be fruitful and multiply. Thats not correspondant with being 🏳️🌈. And btw, that flag is a complete mockery and insult to YHWH, who used the rainbow as a sign he would never flood the earth again.
I personally think that "your truth" includes responsibilities you take on, not just your attractions or lifestyle. I think that faith in God creates a new truth in you and for you when you become a Christian, and that despite what you may feel, any covenant you take during your life becomes part of "your truth". For this man to live his truth authentically, I think that he ought to stay married, surrender his attractions to God (he probably has, assuming that what he said about God's authority on his life is true), and do as he said he would: seek out self/couple's therapy resources.
I watched the extended version of this video and he explains that his wife is very strong in her faith and is very patient and that he loves her quite deeply. He said (in some of the teaser afterwords) that he'd likely not divorce, but I don't know if that's still true.
And- I agree with you on the analogy you used and that marriage is just as much an action as it is an attraction. I have subtly picked up on that over the years, and am becoming more and more excited for how God is going to prepare me for that. I appreciate that you do these videos and get your incites on them. And- step the rules out further: if it was the WIFE! (Not in this case, but, you know.) we'd all pretty much agree that the action of coming out and "pursuing your truth" would be cheating. I definitely understand the exceptions to this argument, though, such as "stuff".
Great video, once again, and God Bless!
From a Christian standpoint, a man having sex with ANYONE other than his own wife is sexually immoral. Period. And having sexual activity of any kind with any man in any capacity is homosexuality. Call it whatever modern name ya want. It’s sinful. Pray.
Why is he being called a christian. Christianity is not a badge it is a relationship. A gay does not have one with God until he/she repents
#1. He can't just "lay around" w/ others & not tell her. STD's exist. #2. There ARE marriages that overcame this. Guess who's happier, the guy that worked through temptation & stayed in the marriage *Who did tell wife in a Christian counseling setting. There's quite a few YT vids as examples (or atleast there used to be) if YT hasn't made it part of the dead internet!
There's also counseling by gay (tendencies) men for gay men to work through issues. It's sad those options have gone underground because it helped people ...not every one but many (just like addiction counseling or anything else) your head & heart has to be in the right place and it takes Will Power for ANY issues you are facing.
There's a Book that gives you the recipe for maximum peace & happiness though. 😊