Does anyone notice that when coming up the stairs in the expectations Tom is climbing the stairs two at a time and has a lot more pep in his stride. He is excited about the concept of seeing summer where as in reality he walks slower at a normal pace and takes the steps one at a time.
Nice catch! An ex girlfriend of mine came from a family of scriptwriters. It was so interesting watching movies with her she really knew and commented on 500 tiny nuance things like the one you mentioned that I never would have noticed.
This scene really speaks to those who have a good level of empathy and/or those who are or have been, themselves, utterly and hopelessly unsuccessful in the romance department.
I don't know. I feel Tom just projects all of his wants onto Summer despite her repeatedly telling him throughout the film who she is. Instead, he just brushes away whatever she's saying and thinks he'll somehow be able to convince her to want to be with him. It's pretty grim.
I think it's just so well done scene. It worked when this came out and I was 17 and in first real relationship at the time. It still works after all kinda things having happened in between. It is very human emotional based scene that can be attached to so many dissapointments. It being done so well and that feeling being so universal of there being something but just not getting feelings reciprocated at the end of it all. Whatever the reason is why not.
This has got to be one of my favourite movie scenes of all time. The comparison of the two different outcomes are absolutely spot on. The background music fits the scene superbly as well. Masterful scene.
@@davidedos9031 the scene didn't become a meme, just the "Expectations vs. Reality" format. I don't think there's anything wrong with that, it's not like the movie is tainted because people are having some fun on the internet.
This movie perfectly represented how it feels like to be in Unrequited Love. The sadness, regrets of what you could have done differently, the absence of logic, the frustration of unable to change the mind of object of affection and the constant question of "Why you can't choose me?" in which only strengthens the curiosity and determination to find the answer that makes you feel insecure and depressed because at the end, you still don't know the answer because you are hopelessly in love.
@@TheFockerizer It's tragically beautiful. I've experienced many emotional pain in my life except of the death of a love one and nothing is more painful than letting go of someone you still soooo hopelessly in love. It's beautiful because it signifies strength, resilience and strong heart. Love is really something else...
I first watched this movie with my Girlfriend at the time but I was in the process of getting over my Ex who had cheated on me. Clearly I wasn't over the Ex and I remember how intense watching this movie next to my new GF made me feel. I was devastated inside out and this movie sucked me right back down. A true Master piece of a Real Heartbreak. Like Tom, eventually "Time healed everything" and I got on with life and later met my "Autumn" with whom I have two little stinkers that make me happy every day and make me realize that back then I was just being redirected to something better in the end!
maybe start writing actual short stories or something and sharing them in places where it is solicited or will actually be read, not just a cry into the void
Really depicts how life really is. You’re hopeful when an opportunity presents itself and your mind creates the scenarios you want to happen, but then reality kicks in and it’s nothing like how you hoped for it to be. People say you have to be in the right mindset for things to go the way you want them to, but I refer them to this grand example! Having these expectations and telling yourself that these will happen if you want them hard enough isn’t going to alter reality in any way. That’s why I have no expectations for anything nowadays. Whatever happens, happens and I learn to cope with it whether I like it or not. You may think that’s sad and I’m being depressed, but really, it gives me a greater appreciation for the small things. No expectations means no disappointment.
I came to this scene after I met with my ex-girlfriend of 4 years yesterday (I live in another country and she came here for a month now). Even though there are no relationships between us anymore and I know it's over, I still felt exactly like in this scene. She was telling me about her new partner and I started comparing myself to him. Eventually, after we went home, I was left just with this sense of emptiness. I feel fine today, but I realized that my mistake was that I went to meet my ex instead of trying to have a good time for myself. I think that it's good not just to remove any expectations, but also to meet other people without relying on these people for fun.
@@NameNik223 I’m sorry this happened to you, but you’re right, meeting her was a mistake. Not that you can’t be civil with an ex, but her going on about her current bf is just a stab in the heart, and you never need that. Yes, that’s what I believe, make fun for yourself without the help of others. If you meet others and they make it more fun, great but it’s not likely to happen so don’t be disappointed if it doesn’t. Coping is a skill we all have to find a way to develop. I just got out of a relationship with someone I liked very much but meeting her family really left me feeling uneasy about going forward with her. Long story short, they are nothing like my family and if they all met, eventually I think heads would clash and I’d have a Romeo and Juliet scenario, and that’s a lot of unnecessary drama I don’t need. I don’t attract a lot of girls, so I’m sad this didn’t go my way, but truth be told, I’m happy to be a free man again. I get to do whatever I want without having to check in or amuse anyone else. Sure I get sad and lonely sometimes, but I’ll take that over feeling trapped and uneasy, even if it comes with some romance. We need to show the women of today that we aren’t desperate for love or companionship and we can get by on our own. Getting noticed and admired by women is great, but it’s not a necessity for happiness. Let’s show em we can survive loneliness!
@@angel_in-black Good for you to keep the high spirits! I agree, we should be able to live independently and be responsible for ourselves before being responsible for our future women
Then at 1:36 as it dawns on him that hes not gonna get what he expected. His expectations lower and align with reality. Making the buildings the same size again
This scene broke me lol. I was going through the same thing Tom did. Though I look back and I made the same mistakes Tom did. I was thinking about what I want, not what she wants. She even gave hints that she just wanted to be friends, though I did what exactly Tom did. I ignored them. This scene is really a master piece. In the "Expectations" the shot was focused on Tom and Summer, and the "Reality" they were spread out on the opposite end in the shot. In "Expectation" the scene is more lighter as in "Reality" the scene seems to be toned darker in the background. In the "Reality" it's also more blurred in the background and the shot more focused on Tom. And then the best part got cut off... rip. The best part is him running down the stairs, seeing the couples walking across him making him think of Summer. The world around him getting erased as if he is alone and erased from his dreams, from Summer's world.
no, i think that in reality her reaction was just like "aw that was nice of you" whereas his expectation was that it really meant a lot to her, that it really touched her inside; hence the look she gave him
I think many people get the message to avoid people like this when watching this film. Quite on the contrary, it is simply depicting our flaw in searching for love when, in reality, we fall in love which is something rather accidental. That's when true love occurs. Tom was searching for a love that wasn't there with Summer.
Tom was trying to will that love into existence. With Summer it was never going to be anything more than like. Tom was really guilty of being a person who was more in love with the idea of being in love than he actually was with the person he was supposedly in love with. The party was a good thing because it actually woke him up, and forced him to mature past those childlike dreams of true love, that only exist in the movies.
I have experienced this 5 years ago. The day he suddenly texted me "I have a girlfriend now. You should find yours too!" even though we haven't been talking for a week after he broke my heart. I ran to the street, to the Yarra River, and cried my heart out there.
Girl that curved me after a fling invited me to her birthday party. I turned that invitation down to avoid this scene. I'll never forget the important lessons in this flick.
@Jokerpilled Saint Yeah. You BEEN in relationships. I can't IMAGINE why they didn't work out lol. My body count is nine but I don't know what the amount of people I have slept with has got to do with anything. Don't ever call me buddy. I would never be friends with someone like you.
My ex gf LITERALLY just got engaged yesterday... And I watched this movie last night and to my surprise, this scene happened.. one of the biggest punch in the guts I've seen.. hurts man.. I WAS Tom in that moment. Every feeling of grief comes flooding in all at once and there's NOTHING you can do about it..
@@NameNik223 man, I still don't know to this day. She's married now unfortunately but she texts me every couple months or something. Idk why. I'm starting to think the marriage isn't all that it was cooked up to be for her. Every other day of the week she'd post SO much of their relationship and now it's just completely stopped not long after they ended up getting married. I just think she did it for the sake of it. Sorry, I'm getting way too lost in the sauce
Most brilliant movie of late 2000's. Amazing Cinematography, script running back n forth in time with Tom's memory. Parallel reality he realized by the end of it.
@@erc5033 He's talking fake positivity bullshit like "why make something disposable like a building when you can make something that can last forever, like a greeting card". He doesn't believe it, no one else buys it either and he knows that full well but he's trying to save face.
@@axechop I thought he was being sarcastic, like making fun of himself, but was repealing his inner insecurity, which drove Summer away. But what you say it's interesting as well.
@@erc5033 If it was a joke, he should have resigned. Summer said he would become an excellent engineer, but he didn't have time to finish it at the moment, so he pretended because he was still immersed in Summer's fantasy.
Disappointment can make you go numb. I remember all the times I was excited to see the girl I like at an event or party only for the night to end in disappointment.
Sometimes, I hate when people say what Tom felt is just an "illusion" or he just fell in love with "idea" of her. Emotions/Feelings are complicated and hard to control especially when it comes to Love. She wanted Summer because she keeps giving him mixed signals in which resulted in feeling of "longing" and that is natural part of human emotions. Unrequited Love is just a special kind of hell. It makes you wondering what's wrong with you, analyze the situation why she can't choose you, and that only fuels the feeling of longing. For me, they are both wrong. But it doesn't matter who is right or wrong. The point of the movie is sometimes love is just not enough. No matter how much you love the other person, it won't always gonna work out and that doesn't mean there's something wrong with you. It's a combination of past experiences, differences, beliefs, values and other stuffs. Like Summer said, "It just wasn't me you were right about." which proves my point. Stop blaming who is wrong and just focus on the lessons. Just a reminder: Don't be a Tom who fell in love at first sight and has high expectations and if you want to be a Summer, know when to STOP. Always, always, always study the person you spend time with.
this is the best scene in 500 days of summer. so much detail was put into separating reality from expectations, the way they’re asymmetrical from the start as the expected tom already arrives at summer before reality tom does, the way reality overtakes expectations when he sees her ring. ugh, everything about this scene is so amazing.
This definitely hit hard but I’m glad it’s not cliched. It’s realistic. That’s how relationships work in real life, where you won’t always end up with the person you think is “the one”.
I love how in the final scene, "reality" just pushes "expectations" out of the way as he gets hit with the realization that it's truly over between them.
I particularly like the contrast of physical touch in this scene. The expectations have Summer and Tom subconsciously unable to stop touching each other even if it’s standing really close and their hands/arms brush against one another, which in these expectations anyone else from a mile off could think there was romantic feelings there especially considering how Tom expected people to be more cheerful, therefore observant of his advances towards Summer. In reality, there is more of a distance between the two and Summer especially, only touches Tom when she feels obligated to through appreciative social cues such as rubbing his shoulder to say thanks for the present, but clearly Summer does not have the same feelings as Tom in reality because the ideal physical touches she gives Tom to show they both love each other in expectations, she reciprocates to a different man in reality while keeping as much distance as she can in subconscious actions based on social cues once again or even her discomfort with Tom’s advances and how she didn’t know how to let him down gently.
It amazes me how some people see summer as the villain. It was up to him to control his expectations and that wasn't any fault of her's for not living up to them.
I agree. I never saw Summer as the bad person or villain though. It was more like she was being honest with him, while he lived in liked a dream world. Something akin to Inception, but not really. Not trying to blur the lines.
First time I watched this movie this scene made me so angry at Summer, like a boiling over of the simmering resentment that had been growing for her character over the course of the film. I felt terrible for Tom, and I was completely on his side. It took a few years of growth and a couple of rewatches to realize I was mad at what someone had done to me earlier in life and was projecting my anger onto summer and empathizing with Tom because of my pain. I still don’t think Summer was blameless in this relationship or as considerate of Tom as she could’ve been, but I see past my own issues enough to see it’s just how life is. People aren’t perfect, things won’t always go the way you want no matter how much you want it. Find peace and happiness where you can, and don’t let it drag you into a pit of anger or despair
I dont know if people noticed but when asked about why he went to greeting cards instead of architecture Summer shows slight disappointment that Tom still hasnt pursued his true passion. She only wants what's best for him. Right now all he could think about is the fascination of a romantic relationship with summer instead of something that he has true passion for and honestly more love for. He's just blinded by the want for a relationship since day 1. I feel this is something every one must've went through where after a "break up" they get back up by pursuing something that they've been holding off subconsciously.
Summer isn't a bad person, but why did she invite Tom to what looks to be an engagement party? Don't do that to your exes unless you know for sure they're over you.
I disagree, Summer was actually quite selfish. All her life she's lived a life of privilege due to her beauty and never really had to work for anything or anyone. So naturally, she doesn't acknowledge the feelings of other people. That being Tom was ALSO very selfish as he insisted on forcing Summer (a round hole) into the square peg of his expectations and ideas he had of her, while completely overlooking who she really is. Tom never truly listened to Summer and never took heed of the warning signs she was very obviously putting out.
Every guy should watch this movie before they graduate college. It's a burst of wisdom if you haven't gotten it already with experience. (Since we're all subject to our intrusive thoughts, I'm saying the guy was naive.)
I have a feeling I’m gonna experience this tomorrow. I want to be excited because I love this girl but I’m terrified beyond words because I don’t know what I’ll do if she rejects me
Summer knew Tom suffered a lot for her and that he clearly still had feelings for her, especially after their weekend together. Inviting him for a party (with people he didn’t know) to leave him by himself, knowing all too well that he’d find out that she was engaged, was quite cruel. However, the disappointing look she made after what he answered about buildings and postcards shows her feelings about him, that she felt he wouldn’t mature, that he lacked ambition, and women hate that in a man. It’s telling of why she left him and decided to marry another guy.
Indeed, they both mature thanks to each other; That's the Occam's Razor to all of this. I'd bet money that if Tom had said at the start "I want to be more than platonic, If you're ever ready, let's reconnect and if I'm single we will re-asses." They would have crossed paths, say 450 days later, they likely would have had a great committed relationship.
That's always my point with her. Zoey is older then what's his name anyway so she can leave him because he's immature. It's understandable, but the thoughtlessness and cruelty is borderline narcissistic. She knew how he felt early on and she didn't care
This is nice to see. The part that stands out to me is when he makes a joke about his profession but she doesn’t laugh. They just weren’t a good match. They had different beliefs; different values.
TeddyB3AR He pretty much was a hopeless romantic that hasnt emotionally grown up yet. Which is why in the beginning of the movie it showed him being completely enthralled in the concept of love and other things during his teen years and why he was so good at writing love cards.
how so, the only things he was expecting were the things summer always portrayed towards him. nothing too outlandish or bizarre for me, he was just expecting her to be like how she always was with him specially after she invited him there. even so the expectations died quick after the ring part. this scene just gets real and real, tbh idk how his expectations were ridiculous
@@Kun4LG33ker Tom is an unreliable narrator. Everything we saw about Summer was 100% made up by Tom's imagination, even the prologue with the icecream parlor, highschool quote, showing how perfect she is etc. Everything built up to this point has things missing, glossed over or straight up fabricated by Tom. It can be easy to miss because of how subtle it is but if you pay close attention, especially to the dialogue, you'll see things aren't what they seem.
Shitty Husband finally someone who shares my mentality. You know hes not over you yet, why invite him to your own engagement party. Knowing damn well when he finds out its gonna break him?
Marky D you can do that in other ways. Inviting someone you were with to an engagement party without telling them its purpose is not slapping them with reality. It’s just pure malice.
It's pretty sad how much I covet and adore this film. It's vaguely a perfectly imperfect reflection of my love life...this scene made me cry...it was beautifully written and filmed but then I got mad when it reminded me of quote-on-quote *"Reality"* ....particularly mine 😪
I just rewatched the whole movie after a few years without watching it and I feel like I finally get it. As you grow up you realize that all of your expectations in life and your idealization of little events like meeting someone new are shattered by reality. When our expectations don’t happen we feel like our world is ending but that’s actually where it starts, although we only realize it later, when something better happens to us. That’s why at end I understand Tom, when you go on with life you realize there’s no such things as fate or soulmates, it’s just coincidence, luck and work. I’m so glad I rewatched this movie at a stage of my life where I can actually understand it and where I feel completely lost and melancholic of the past.
I love and hate this film for many reasons but mostly because of how utterly real, raw and heart rendering it is and the saddest thing about it is we’ve all probably been in a situation akin to reality vs. expectations. It sucks.
I usually hate coming-to-age movies because of their happy endings. I can never relate to movies with happy ending because happy endings never happen in real life. But this one doesn't have that typical happy ending bullshit. And that's why I loved, this one I can relate
What’s even crazier and realistic with this scene is the fact that he thought people would acknowledge him in expectation and in reality no one even care and it showed him with the “oh- kay” type face after… 0:39
I realize I viewed this film all wrong. He should've declined the invite. It's not her fault, but he kept going against everything to see if he could change the circumstance of their relationship rather just accepting it and moving on.
He should've declined, and she shouldn't have invited anyway. It was kinda easy to tell he was still into her; Summer just had no attitude and no guts to set some boundaries.
@@gabrielmachia3784 Maybe she did tell him. This is from Tom's point of view and he's a very unreliable narrator. Frankly, nothing he says or sees can be trusted.
I think it was selfish of her to invite him (to any kind of gathering), knowing that he still wasn’t over her. I think a lot of people like Summer and people who defend her actions get an ego boost out of the attention and affection that Tom types give them and take advantage of that for their own gain.
This is a really good movie for guys to watch. It teaches us not to be so obsessed with a woman who doesn’t love us. And the character Summer isn’t a bad person. She didn’t cheat on him. She just fell out of love. Which happens.
This was probably the worst thing Summer did in the film, she should have given him closure and peace not be selfish and try to keep him around as a friend knowing he’s not over her and bombard him with the fact that she’s in a happy loving relationship with someone else.
don't be stupid, she wasn't engaged when she invited him, and he chose to come. her inviting him is her way of asking if he is ready to be friends. him coming is his way of saying yes i am. its not her fault that he came.
@@mariaaahh8106 he chose to attend the gathering an ex invited him to. that means hes choosing to interact w her as friends. thats the implication and its on him if he expected something else.
@@Fifi_almond He's choosing to interact with her friends under the guise that he might still have a chance with her......because she didn't tell him she was dating someone else. Yea he expected Summer to be single......she didn't tell him that she wasn't. Hard to argue Tom's thinking on the matter without that vital piece of information.
The moment I stopped relying on relationships to bring me happiness was the day I truley started to live. It's ok to be single. And it's ok to be yourself.
i was a teen when i first saw this movie. i missed ALL the queues that pointed to her leaving him. i believe the movie starts with a narrator saying this is not a love story and that they'll break up in the end. when it happened, i just COULDN'T wrap my head around how she couldn't love him. in my view she looked so happy to be with him so the ending really stumped me. seeing this as an adult now, i 100% see her boundaries and the differences between the "expectations vs reality" scenes shown here (i couldn't before). it's so mind blowing how blind you could be towards other people's body language and behavior if you don't know what to look for.
This scene completely shattered me. Everything that happened here looked simillar on feb 14. I expected too much and its not her fault for hurting me after that rejection.
My bestie asked me to watch this movie after my last heartbreak. I had a crush on a close friend from uni. I got too enthusiastic about our friendship. After 1 month we stopped talking cause i unintentionally made him uncomfortable with my texts and calls and i apologised when i realised it and gave him space. But he still wanted to avoid me and he texted that I am not his therapist. It pained me a lot. After seeing this movie i started feeling better about it. Now I met an amazing guy on a dating app and taking it slow this time looking forward to where it will go. Even if i get another heartbreak i know i will be able to handle it better this time❤
I’m the same way. My expectations are always through the roof, have always been since I was a kid. And after all the letdowns and now at 26, I thought I’d know better☹️
*Today's lesson: Patience.* *Sometimes it can lead to alot. Often times it can lead to very little. And makes it feel not worth it. And then you wonder, why you waiting so long for something so disappointing...💔*
Every time I get a new crush I watch this scene to humble myself and adjust my expectations
Yes so you won't feel so damn stupid at the end
Real
Dude I'm doing that right now!
: - (
Don't be pathetic, and go for it. Take the risk. What could happen if she/he rejects you? Keep moving forward. We must learn to be happy by ourselves.
This is life.
UzQ2
😂😂😂
@@aureliajesical.1569 Funny till it happens to you, unrequited love hurts a lot
Narrated by Morgan Freeman
This is boxing ggg
Does anyone notice that when coming up the stairs in the expectations Tom is climbing the stairs two at a time and has a lot more pep in his stride. He is excited about the concept of seeing summer where as in reality he walks slower at a normal pace and takes the steps one at a time.
because in reality, he knows he'll probably get hurt again
Anxiety. You know he's imagining the Expectation, but he knows getting hurt is a possibility
Quinexl o it’s because he’s hoping for the best but expecting the worst
Nice catch! An ex girlfriend of mine came from a family of scriptwriters. It was so interesting watching movies with her she really knew and commented on 500 tiny nuance things like the one you mentioned that I never would have noticed.
Also he's probably not as fit as he thinks he is.
This scene really speaks to those who have a good level of empathy and/or those who are or have been, themselves, utterly and hopelessly unsuccessful in the romance department.
You are so right. And the lyrics of the song just fit so perfectly into that feeling.
Right here lol
I don't know. I feel Tom just projects all of his wants onto Summer despite her repeatedly telling him throughout the film who she is. Instead, he just brushes away whatever she's saying and thinks he'll somehow be able to convince her to want to be with him. It's pretty grim.
Tom is just human I'm sure if he could help it he would feel nothing ever in his life@@AngSco30
I think it's just so well done scene. It worked when this came out and I was 17 and in first real relationship at the time. It still works after all kinda things having happened in between. It is very human emotional based scene that can be attached to so many dissapointments. It being done so well and that feeling being so universal of there being something but just not getting feelings reciprocated at the end of it all. Whatever the reason is why not.
This has got to be one of my favourite movie scenes of all time. The comparison of the two different outcomes are absolutely spot on. The background music fits the scene superbly as well. Masterful scene.
Its Regina Spektor... what could i say?
it was aight
hello mr salamanca
This scene broke me...
I've been happy so far for a while and its like this movie just brought back years worth of crippling deppresion
That movie is so sad the breakup at the beginning and that scene they broke me
@@alainpoteaujr7805 they didn't break up....because they were never together 😔
this scene will drastically change your mood into so much sadness
This scene is my life
The way the scene closes on the expectations side was so good it felt like a subtle message that reality crushes expectations
Good eye
This is truly one of the most beautiful and brutally realistic scenes ever put to film. It really sucks that this became a stupid meme.
It did?😡
@@davidedos9031 the scene didn't become a meme, just the "Expectations vs. Reality" format. I don't think there's anything wrong with that, it's not like the movie is tainted because people are having some fun on the internet.
I think there are even more realistic, it's that no one even talked to you in a party, It has happened to me, and I lasted like 10 minutes or less.
calm down buddy
@@KbanjoK exactly, the fact the format was memed just shows what a universal experience this scene managed to so convey so powerfully
This scene absolutely guts me. We've all had those moments in life when you realize something that sends your whole world crashing.
This scene is a masterpiece. But you cut out the best part.
It's always like this with MovieClips, which is a shame because it's probably the best quality on YT.
+3000KJH you couldn't have put it better
EXATCLY, morons! LOL!!!
They’ve been known to always cut it where it’s about to really hit
Maybe they didn’t want to spoil the most emotional point in the movie?
This movie perfectly represented how it feels like to be in Unrequited Love. The sadness, regrets of what you could have done differently, the absence of logic, the frustration of unable to change the mind of object of affection and the constant question of "Why you can't choose me?" in which only strengthens the curiosity and determination to find the answer that makes you feel insecure and depressed because at the end, you still don't know the answer because you are hopelessly in love.
but I hope the viewers would learn the beauty and relief of letting go
@@TheFockerizer It's tragically beautiful. I've experienced many emotional pain in my life except of the death of a love one and nothing is more painful than letting go of someone you still soooo hopelessly in love. It's beautiful because it signifies strength, resilience and strong heart. Love is really something else...
You’ve described it amazingly 🙌🏼
I first watched this movie with my Girlfriend at the time but I was in the process of getting over my Ex who had cheated on me. Clearly I wasn't over the Ex and I remember how intense watching this movie next to my new GF made me feel. I was devastated inside out and this movie sucked me right back down. A true Master piece of a Real Heartbreak. Like Tom, eventually "Time healed everything" and I got on with life and later met my "Autumn" with whom I have two little stinkers that make me happy every day and make me realize that back then I was just being redirected to something better in the end!
"Two little stinkers" LMAO!
Congrats on the life!
maybe start writing actual short stories or something and sharing them in places where it is solicited or will actually be read, not just a cry into the void
awesome for you man
@@meg-ps6rs WHO HURT YOU, IT'LL BE OK
Finally a movie shows what actually happens in real life .
Really depicts how life really is. You’re hopeful when an opportunity presents itself and your mind creates the scenarios you want to happen, but then reality kicks in and it’s nothing like how you hoped for it to be. People say you have to be in the right mindset for things to go the way you want them to, but I refer them to this grand example! Having these expectations and telling yourself that these will happen if you want them hard enough isn’t going to alter reality in any way. That’s why I have no expectations for anything nowadays. Whatever happens, happens and I learn to cope with it whether I like it or not. You may think that’s sad and I’m being depressed, but really, it gives me a greater appreciation for the small things. No expectations means no disappointment.
I came to this scene after I met with my ex-girlfriend of 4 years yesterday (I live in another country and she came here for a month now). Even though there are no relationships between us anymore and I know it's over, I still felt exactly like in this scene. She was telling me about her new partner and I started comparing myself to him.
Eventually, after we went home, I was left just with this sense of emptiness. I feel fine today, but I realized that my mistake was that I went to meet my ex instead of trying to have a good time for myself. I think that it's good not just to remove any expectations, but also to meet other people without relying on these people for fun.
@@NameNik223 I’m sorry this happened to you, but you’re right, meeting her was a mistake. Not that you can’t be civil with an ex, but her going on about her current bf is just a stab in the heart, and you never need that. Yes, that’s what I believe, make fun for yourself without the help of others. If you meet others and they make it more fun, great but it’s not likely to happen so don’t be disappointed if it doesn’t. Coping is a skill we all have to find a way to develop. I just got out of a relationship with someone I liked very much but meeting her family really left me feeling uneasy about going forward with her. Long story short, they are nothing like my family and if they all met, eventually I think heads would clash and I’d have a Romeo and Juliet scenario, and that’s a lot of unnecessary drama I don’t need. I don’t attract a lot of girls, so I’m sad this didn’t go my way, but truth be told, I’m happy to be a free man again. I get to do whatever I want without having to check in or amuse anyone else. Sure I get sad and lonely sometimes, but I’ll take that over feeling trapped and uneasy, even if it comes with some romance. We need to show the women of today that we aren’t desperate for love or companionship and we can get by on our own. Getting noticed and admired by women is great, but it’s not a necessity for happiness. Let’s show em we can survive loneliness!
@@angel_in-black Good for you to keep the high spirits! I agree, we should be able to live independently and be responsible for ourselves before being responsible for our future women
Anyone whose ever had an unrequited love, understands how great this scene is.
1:07 god i love that scene. The city skylines are enlarged to show distortion and artificial of that expectation
Never noticed that before, good eye!
Then at 1:36 as it dawns on him that hes not gonna get what he expected. His expectations lower and align with reality. Making the buildings the same size again
Never noticed that and I have watched this scene a lot
Summer will pass, Autumn will come soon. Just hold on tight
Its fall 2020 and winter is coming
But a broken heart can't come together
@@SD_91 It will with time, patience and self-improvement.
(500) Days of Autumn
This scene broke me lol. I was going through the same thing Tom did. Though I look back and I made the same mistakes Tom did. I was thinking about what I want, not what she wants. She even gave hints that she just wanted to be friends, though I did what exactly Tom did. I ignored them.
This scene is really a master piece. In the "Expectations" the shot was focused on Tom and Summer, and the "Reality" they were spread out on the opposite end in the shot. In "Expectation" the scene is more lighter as in "Reality" the scene seems to be toned darker in the background. In the "Reality" it's also more blurred in the background and the shot more focused on Tom. And then the best part got cut off... rip. The best part is him running down the stairs, seeing the couples walking across him making him think of Summer. The world around him getting erased as if he is alone and erased from his dreams, from Summer's world.
Spoder OG
You couldn't say it better friend. :')
Spoder OG damn, I hope you’re doing much better now
idk why but its the job quitting scene that broke me
this scene made me laugh lmao
@@duyong4172 duality of man
She actually shows more emotion and love in reality when he gives her the gift… anyone else notice that?
no, i think that in reality her reaction was just like "aw that was nice of you" whereas his expectation was that it really meant a lot to her, that it really touched her inside; hence the look she gave him
in the reality one she was making more of a superficial show, where as in the expectations sequence she sincerely appreciated *him*
I think many people get the message to avoid people like this when watching this film. Quite on the contrary, it is simply depicting our flaw in searching for love when, in reality, we fall in love which is something rather accidental. That's when true love occurs. Tom was searching for a love that wasn't there with Summer.
Tom was trying to will that love into existence. With Summer it was never going to be anything more than like. Tom was really guilty of being a person who was more in love with the idea of being in love than he actually was with the person he was supposedly in love with. The party was a good thing because it actually woke him up, and forced him to mature past those childlike dreams of true love, that only exist in the movies.
This is where real men cry.
Never cried at a scene so terribly since Toy Story 3
I have experienced this 5 years ago. The day he suddenly texted me "I have a girlfriend now. You should find yours too!" even though we haven't been talking for a week after he broke my heart. I ran to the street, to the Yarra River, and cried my heart out there.
It's amazing how this scene perfectly captures an unfortunate event that every guy has experienced in his life
And girllll
Girls experience this too
@@ddwow566 only guys
@@crater044 only guys
@@crater044no
Girl that curved me after a fling invited me to her birthday party. I turned that invitation down to avoid this scene. I'll never forget the important lessons in this flick.
😂😂😂Glad that this movie actually teaches a few lessons about real life
Good for you
you’re the hero of this story
@Jokerpilled Saint Yeah, you're clearly wayyy to o immature for a relationship.
@Jokerpilled Saint Yeah. You BEEN in relationships. I can't IMAGINE why they didn't work out lol. My body count is nine but I don't know what the amount of people I have slept with has got to do with anything. Don't ever call me buddy. I would never be friends with someone like you.
My ex gf LITERALLY just got engaged yesterday... And I watched this movie last night and to my surprise, this scene happened.. one of the biggest punch in the guts I've seen.. hurts man.. I WAS Tom in that moment. Every feeling of grief comes flooding in all at once and there's NOTHING you can do about it..
This movie has a way of digging up THAT girl in your memory and making you feel that pain you went through all over again
Hey man, how are you feeling now?
@@NameNik223 man, I still don't know to this day. She's married now unfortunately but she texts me every couple months or something. Idk why. I'm starting to think the marriage isn't all that it was cooked up to be for her. Every other day of the week she'd post SO much of their relationship and now it's just completely stopped not long after they ended up getting married. I just think she did it for the sake of it. Sorry, I'm getting way too lost in the sauce
@@OliverJames1 That is rough. How do you feel about your ex yourself? Seems like you're still not really over her
@@NameNik223 I feel indifferent, I guess. I'm conflicted. Part of me is still mad at her
Most brilliant movie of late 2000's.
Amazing Cinematography, script running back n forth in time with Tom's memory.
Parallel reality he realized by the end of it.
you cut literally the best part
The "greeting card" part is where he realises everyone can see through his mask.
What do you mean. Interesting thought
@@erc5033 He's talking fake positivity bullshit like "why make something disposable like a building when you can make something that can last forever, like a greeting card". He doesn't believe it, no one else buys it either and he knows that full well but he's trying to save face.
@@axechop I thought he was being sarcastic, like making fun of himself, but was repealing his inner insecurity, which drove Summer away. But what you say it's interesting as well.
@@erc5033 Yeah I agree with you. It sounds like he meant it to come off as a joke, but his resentful tone didn't sell
@@erc5033 If it was a joke, he should have resigned. Summer said he would become an excellent engineer, but he didn't have time to finish it at the moment, so he pretended because he was still immersed in Summer's fantasy.
This scene broke me many many times, when reality doesn't meet expectations
Disappointment can make you go numb. I remember all the times I was excited to see the girl I like at an event or party only for the night to end in disappointment.
One of the most painful yet true scenes in all of cinematic history
Sometimes, I hate when people say what Tom felt is just an "illusion" or he just fell in love with "idea" of her.
Emotions/Feelings are complicated and hard to control especially when it comes to Love. She wanted Summer because she keeps giving him mixed signals in which resulted in feeling of "longing" and that is natural part of human emotions. Unrequited Love is just a special kind of hell. It makes you wondering what's wrong with you, analyze the situation why she can't choose you, and that only fuels the feeling of longing. For me, they are both wrong. But it doesn't matter who is right or wrong. The point of the movie is sometimes love is just not enough. No matter how much you love the other person, it won't always gonna work out and that doesn't mean there's something wrong with you. It's a combination of past experiences, differences, beliefs, values and other stuffs. Like Summer said, "It just wasn't me you were right about." which proves my point. Stop blaming who is wrong and just focus on the lessons.
Just a reminder: Don't be a Tom who fell in love at first sight and has high expectations and if you want to be a Summer, know when to STOP. Always, always, always study the person you spend time with.
this is a masterpiece. will never get over it
this is the best scene in 500 days of summer. so much detail was put into separating reality from expectations, the way they’re asymmetrical from the start as the expected tom already arrives at summer before reality tom does, the way reality overtakes expectations when he sees her ring. ugh, everything about this scene is so amazing.
This definitely hit hard but I’m glad it’s not cliched. It’s realistic. That’s how relationships work in real life, where you won’t always end up with the person you think is “the one”.
This movie hits for a lot of guys because we've all been there.I don't care how hard or suave you think you are, we all have our 500 Days of Summer.
I love how in the final scene, "reality" just pushes "expectations" out of the way as he gets hit with the realization that it's truly over between them.
I particularly like the contrast of physical touch in this scene. The expectations have Summer and Tom subconsciously unable to stop touching each other even if it’s standing really close and their hands/arms brush against one another, which in these expectations anyone else from a mile off could think there was romantic feelings there especially considering how Tom expected people to be more cheerful, therefore observant of his advances towards Summer. In reality, there is more of a distance between the two and Summer especially, only touches Tom when she feels obligated to through appreciative social cues such as rubbing his shoulder to say thanks for the present, but clearly Summer does not have the same feelings as Tom in reality because the ideal physical touches she gives Tom to show they both love each other in expectations, she reciprocates to a different man in reality while keeping as much distance as she can in subconscious actions based on social cues once again or even her discomfort with Tom’s advances and how she didn’t know how to let him down gently.
It amazes me how some people see summer as the villain. It was up to him to control his expectations and that wasn't any fault of her's for not living up to them.
I agree. I never saw Summer as the bad person or villain though. It was more like she was being honest with him, while he lived in liked a dream world.
Something akin to Inception, but not really. Not trying to blur the lines.
She wasn’t the villain as you mentioned but I still think that Summer shouldn’t have invited Tom to her Engagement party though.
She's not a "villain".
She was confused and didn't know what she wanted.
So people's feelings get hurt that way.
She is not a villain she just victim ... Fu*k u summer
I think we spotted Summer
This scene never stops hurting.
First time I watched this movie this scene made me so angry at Summer, like a boiling over of the simmering resentment that had been growing for her character over the course of the film. I felt terrible for Tom, and I was completely on his side. It took a few years of growth and a couple of rewatches to realize I was mad at what someone had done to me earlier in life and was projecting my anger onto summer and empathizing with Tom because of my pain.
I still don’t think Summer was blameless in this relationship or as considerate of Tom as she could’ve been, but I see past my own issues enough to see it’s just how life is. People aren’t perfect, things won’t always go the way you want no matter how much you want it. Find peace and happiness where you can, and don’t let it drag you into a pit of anger or despair
I could have written this post.
Having just been dumped 20 minutes ago. I find myself once again coming back to this film and more particularly this scene.
Such is life eh
I dont know if people noticed but when asked about why he went to greeting cards instead of architecture Summer shows slight disappointment that Tom still hasnt pursued his true passion. She only wants what's best for him. Right now all he could think about is the fascination of a romantic relationship with summer instead of something that he has true passion for and honestly more love for. He's just blinded by the want for a relationship since day 1. I feel this is something every one must've went through where after a "break up" they get back up by pursuing something that they've been holding off subconsciously.
Summer isn't a bad person, but why did she invite Tom to what looks to be an engagement party? Don't do that to your exes unless you know for sure they're over you.
She wanted to do one last stab into his heart.
I disagree, Summer was actually quite selfish. All her life she's lived a life of privilege due to her beauty and never really had to work for anything or anyone. So naturally, she doesn't acknowledge the feelings of other people. That being Tom was ALSO very selfish as he insisted on forcing Summer (a round hole) into the square peg of his expectations and ideas he had of her, while completely overlooking who she really is. Tom never truly listened to Summer and never took heed of the warning signs she was very obviously putting out.
@@Gaze73 She explains later that her fiance hadn't asked her yet by the time she invited Tom, it was always just a random party she was throwing.
@@FindK00man also she said she still wants to be great friends with Tom
it wasn't an engagement party
Every guy should watch this movie before they graduate college. It's a burst of wisdom if you haven't gotten it already with experience. (Since we're all subject to our intrusive thoughts, I'm saying the guy was naive.)
You're not aloud to say this made you sad unless you've experienced this in real life. It's the worst feeling ever.
Tell me about it. :I
I have a feeling I’m gonna experience this tomorrow. I want to be excited because I love this girl but I’m terrified beyond words because I don’t know what I’ll do if she rejects me
i know that feeling!!!
UPDATE: Welp.... she rejected me and doesn’t want to talk to me ever again🤷🏼♂️
Spider-Bat 2099 Why doesn’t she want to talk to you again?
Summer knew Tom suffered a lot for her and that he clearly still had feelings for her, especially after their weekend together. Inviting him for a party (with people he didn’t know) to leave him by himself, knowing all too well that he’d find out that she was engaged, was quite cruel.
However, the disappointing look she made after what he answered about buildings and postcards shows her feelings about him, that she felt he wouldn’t mature, that he lacked ambition, and women hate that in a man. It’s telling of why she left him and decided to marry another guy.
Indeed, they both mature thanks to each other; That's the Occam's Razor to all of this. I'd bet money that if Tom had said at the start "I want to be more than platonic, If you're ever ready, let's reconnect and if I'm single we will re-asses." They would have crossed paths, say 450 days later, they likely would have had a great committed relationship.
That's always my point with her. Zoey is older then what's his name anyway so she can leave him because he's immature. It's understandable, but the thoughtlessness and cruelty is borderline narcissistic. She knew how he felt early on and she didn't care
@@donaldshotts4429 she does care eventually, we see her crying and being obviously sad and Tom being unable to respond or understand her.
This is nice to see.
The part that stands out to me is when he makes a joke about his profession but she doesn’t laugh.
They just weren’t a good match. They had different beliefs; different values.
Ive seen this scene so many times. Looking back... his expectations were kinda ridiculous lol
thatsthepoint.jpg
TeddyB3AR He pretty much was a hopeless romantic that hasnt emotionally grown up yet. Which is why in the beginning of the movie it showed him being completely enthralled in the concept of love and other things during his teen years and why he was so good at writing love cards.
how so, the only things he was expecting were the things summer always portrayed towards him. nothing too outlandish or bizarre for me, he was just expecting her to be like how she always was with him specially after she invited him there. even so the expectations died quick after the ring part. this scene just gets real and real, tbh idk how his expectations were ridiculous
@@Kun4LG33ker Tom is an unreliable narrator. Everything we saw about Summer was 100% made up by Tom's imagination, even the prologue with the icecream parlor, highschool quote, showing how perfect she is etc. Everything built up to this point has things missing, glossed over or straight up fabricated by Tom. It can be easy to miss because of how subtle it is but if you pay close attention, especially to the dialogue, you'll see things aren't what they seem.
why even invite him if your engaged? You moved on with your life. let him do the same.
Shitty Husband finally someone who shares my mentality. You know hes not over you yet, why invite him to your own engagement party. Knowing damn well when he finds out its gonna break him?
@@mr.potatohead5355 i think it furthers the point that she's actually mean
she wanted to be friends, like they always were
Thank you. I didn't like her at all
Marky D you can do that in other ways. Inviting someone you were with to an engagement party without telling them its purpose is not slapping them with reality. It’s just pure malice.
It's pretty sad how much I covet and adore this film. It's vaguely a perfectly imperfect reflection of my love life...this scene made me cry...it was beautifully written and filmed but then I got mad when it reminded me of quote-on-quote *"Reality"* ....particularly mine 😪
00:36 she had the ring on the whole time :(
"Why make something disposable like a Building, when you can make something that lasts forever: like a greeting card. Hahaha."
What delivery. 👌🤌
man i always get goosebumps when the camera pans in into the reality.
I just rewatched the whole movie after a few years without watching it and I feel like I finally get it. As you grow up you realize that all of your expectations in life and your idealization of little events like meeting someone new are shattered by reality. When our expectations don’t happen we feel like our world is ending but that’s actually where it starts, although we only realize it later, when something better happens to us. That’s why at end I understand Tom, when you go on with life you realize there’s no such things as fate or soulmates, it’s just coincidence, luck and work. I’m so glad I rewatched this movie at a stage of my life where I can actually understand it and where I feel completely lost and melancholic of the past.
I don't need to fall in love to be heartbroken, I just watch this scene, and I am served.
One of my favorite movie scenes this a masterclass in all aspects, storytelling, acting, cinematography
I love and hate this film for many reasons but mostly because of how utterly real, raw and heart rendering it is and the saddest thing about it is we’ve all probably been in a situation akin to reality vs. expectations. It sucks.
He kept on having perfect expectations which pressured her. He didn’t truly love her but only loved the idea of her.
But he was still a hopeless romantic while she was just a cold and cruel b.....
@@seri895 Nope, he was an unreliable narrator, self centred and delusional.
I usually hate coming-to-age movies because of their happy endings.
I can never relate to movies with happy ending because happy endings never happen in real life.
But this one doesn't have that typical happy ending bullshit. And that's why I loved, this one I can relate
You must love The Graduated
Celeste and Jesse Forever is another good one
Forrest gump
Movies that don’t have a happy ending are the best ones imo
You wrote “happy endings never happen TO ME” wrong. Do you really think out of almost 10 billion people no one made their dreams come true?
Anyone else rewatch the movie about 51 times to specifically cry at this scene?
This scene is a punch to the gut. Loving someone who doesn't feel the same way can be so crushing. It hurts.
For real
The scene hits so hard when you have been in Tom's shoes
What’s even crazier and realistic with this scene is the fact that he thought people would acknowledge him in expectation and in reality no one even care and it showed him with the “oh- kay” type face after… 0:39
I realize I viewed this film all wrong. He should've declined the invite. It's not her fault, but he kept going against everything to see if he could change the circumstance of their relationship rather just accepting it and moving on.
He should've declined, and she shouldn't have invited anyway. It was kinda easy to tell he was still into her; Summer just had no attitude and no guts to set some boundaries.
@@gabrielmachia3784 Maybe she did tell him. This is from Tom's point of view and he's a very unreliable narrator. Frankly, nothing he says or sees can be trusted.
I think it was selfish of her to invite him (to any kind of gathering), knowing that he still wasn’t over her. I think a lot of people like Summer and people who defend her actions get an ego boost out of the attention and affection that Tom types give them and take advantage of that for their own gain.
This is a really good movie for guys to watch. It teaches us not to be so obsessed with a woman who doesn’t love us. And the character Summer isn’t a bad person. She didn’t cheat on him. She just fell out of love. Which happens.
Expectations can kill a simple man.
Love this scene. Seeing this in the theater, I wasn't ready.
As my wife often reminds me: Our frustrations are a product of our expectations.
One of the greatest and saddest scenes in cinema history
the comparison when he imagined making out but in reality got tequila- I felt that
this movie just hits you with reality like a truck
This scene is such a heartbreak. One of my favourite movie of alltime
This was probably the worst thing Summer did in the film, she should have given him closure and peace not be selfish and try to keep him around as a friend knowing he’s not over her and bombard him with the fact that she’s in a happy loving relationship with someone else.
don't be stupid, she wasn't engaged when she invited him, and he chose to come. her inviting him is her way of asking if he is ready to be friends. him coming is his way of saying yes i am. its not her fault that he came.
@@Fifi_almond he chose to come because he never knew whats going to happen there
@@mariaaahh8106 he chose to attend the gathering an ex invited him to. that means hes choosing to interact w her as friends. thats the implication and its on him if he expected something else.
@@Fifi_almond He's choosing to interact with her friends under the guise that he might still have a chance with her......because she didn't tell him she was dating someone else. Yea he expected Summer to be single......she didn't tell him that she wasn't. Hard to argue Tom's thinking on the matter without that vital piece of information.
She had to make it conclusive, otherwise he would always think that he stood a chance. She was being cruel to be kind.
The moment I stopped relying on relationships to bring me happiness was the day I truley started to live.
It's ok to be single.
And it's ok to be yourself.
I really like this!!! Because it's the absolute truth, it's the way!
First time I saw this scene, didn’t really think about it. Today, more then ever, I can connect with this scene.
Can we talk about the editing in this movie? It's perfect.
This whole movie, is one of the most beautiful directing I've ever seen, I'm so sorry Webb couldn't keep with that level of beauty in his latter work
Just found out the guy I'd always hoped would "come back to me one day" got engaged... yeah, I feel this.
You try hard to fix your broken heart, but this scene is breaking it over and over again.
Us man
i was a teen when i first saw this movie. i missed ALL the queues that pointed to her leaving him. i believe the movie starts with a narrator saying this is not a love story and that they'll break up in the end. when it happened, i just COULDN'T wrap my head around how she couldn't love him. in my view she looked so happy to be with him so the ending really stumped me.
seeing this as an adult now, i 100% see her boundaries and the differences between the "expectations vs reality" scenes shown here (i couldn't before). it's so mind blowing how blind you could be towards other people's body language and behavior if you don't know what to look for.
This scene hits hard.
Took me so much to understand that a secret of happiness is to not have any expectations at all.
How many times have we not gone through these situations, where reality hurts even more because of our expectations?
This is the most beautiful creative framing device in filmography
Had this same exact experience. After that I realized to never depend on anyone.
This scene completely shattered me. Everything that happened here looked simillar on feb 14. I expected too much and its not her fault for hurting me after that rejection.
My bestie asked me to watch this movie after my last heartbreak. I had a crush on a close friend from uni. I got too enthusiastic about our friendship. After 1 month we stopped talking cause i unintentionally made him uncomfortable with my texts and calls and i apologised when i realised it and gave him space. But he still wanted to avoid me and he texted that I am not his therapist. It pained me a lot. After seeing this movie i started feeling better about it. Now I met an amazing guy on a dating app and taking it slow this time looking forward to where it will go. Even if i get another heartbreak i know i will be able to handle it better this time❤
I’m the same way. My expectations are always through the roof, have always been since I was a kid. And after all the letdowns and now at 26, I thought I’d know better☹️
This expectation vs reality part and la la land's last part broke me💔
This movie is so real
you can pinpoint the exact moments where his heart rips in half
I'm glad I watched this movie. Now every rejection feels less painful
My favorite scene in any movie ever
This scene is hands down legendary
This is my favorite scene in the movie that's why sometimes reality sucks cause we have lots of expectations in this life
Regina Spektor makes the most amazing songs
Yeah she is underrated
*Today's lesson: Patience.*
*Sometimes it can lead to alot. Often times it can lead to very little. And makes it feel not worth it. And then you wonder, why you waiting so long for something so disappointing...💔*
Beautiful. Painfully beautiful.
Movie is a straight up masterpiece. So underrated.