Відео

Not your sibling and not multiple people. Annie is your sister and an individual.

"They"? Did you have a date with a couple? Why not keep that heteronormative crap to a threesome app or whatever?

Thank you. This helps ❤ 🌻

Girl, as a fellow UA-cam creator, don't ever take comments on shorts to heart,just delete comments that you feel have a negative energy.

I'm sad to see that apparently this incident has affected you to the point you haven't continued your vlogmas series. Your apology was very generous and is sufficient. I hope you can get past this and move on with confidence. Sending you Dutch love.

Unsolicited pro tip for faking it to make it with self confidence: Watch the way you use diminishing language about yourself. "Nope, it's *just* me" In that moment, you gave your power away to the cashier and the self-conscious part of your brain that feels insecure and is judging you about being there alone. ✨You are enough✨ full stop, period. You do not have to apologize for existing and living a full life simply because you are doing it solo. Next time, try something like, "No, I'm here to dine in." Period. Because that's what she asked. Even if she _meant or was implying there's something "weird" about showing up alone_ ,you have no obligation to entertain other people's hang ups. I know that was a lot of words about doing something different, but I just wanted to say you are truly doing incredible work and it sounds like putting in the hard emotion labour of ahowing up for your self and putting intention into action!! So proud of you ❤🥳💖🥹

🍀

Elly, were there any shows that you WERE allowed to watch as a child that you think still hold up/would watch today?

There's a video on UA-cam of an autistic creator explaining how she sees herself in Jess and that gave me a new perspective on the show

Honestly, shoutout to both of you for apologizing. Hopefully this video reached that person and you both realize it was just a misunderstanding and can move forward Obviously I’m not either of you and don’t want to invalidate anyone’s feelings but I have been on both ends of this as well and while I’ve tried to apologize for misinterpreting comments and reacting as such, I can’t recall ever getting an apology so it’s cool that you both did acknowledge how the other person felt ♥️

I love solo dates!!!! ❤❤❤❤

You doing ok? I miss your lovely chatmas vids!!

So happy to see that you are still journaling 💜

Lovely food. 👍

You look maybe the happiest I can ever remember seeing you. Elly, I'm totally loving watching you build the life you want and deserve. Not that it matters what a stranger on the internet thinks, but I'm so proud of you!! ❤❤❤

I moved abroad out of college and my boyfriend at the time broke up with me over text basically. I was living alone for the first time, broken up with, and had no family or friends and a new job and it was depressing over winter break. I started making friends, getting out of my comfort zone, planning trips, and slowly I got a little more comfortable eating out alone, going places alone, etc. For a while, I was really hung up on my ex and then I was gung ho about dating, but like you said - I would just not share my real opinion or try to match the other person’s expectations, etc. and wasn’t really being myself sometimes. I just wanted to date someone and not be lonely. Eventually, I went on a trip to visit friends and ended up meeting my husband. It was a chance meeting and we had to be long distance, but I felt so much more comfortable around him! I was able to be weird and quirky and didn’t feel like I needed to impress him, and he and I learned how to communicate despite language and cultural barriers. I am glad I had some time to grow before I met him. Also, even once we were married, I went on solo trips and now that we have kids, I am usually the one free in the day time to go to a movie or lunch by myself, and it’s nice sometimes. Journaling definitely helps and being grateful for small things and recognizing how much your friends/family do for you also makes a big difference. I also grew up Christian / fundie (ish) and it’s been so great seeing your journey. I wish you the best! ❤

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This is totally a miscommunication. No one is the bad guy <3 LOVE to everyone

Once you get over the initial feeling of being perceived and judged for being alone, you quickly find out that absolutely no one cares if you are a solo diner, except occasionally waitstaff as they know they will be getting a smaller tip from a smaller total bill than if the table was filled. When I go out alone, I always tip extra high to make up for that. Business travelers dine alone lots, and no one knows you aren’t a business traveler, lol.

💜💜💜

Glad to hear it sounds like you're in a really good place these days! And glad both your with-someone date and your solo-date went well. :)

❤ you are awesome haters gonna hate 🎉 so proud of you Elliy

Omg I'm so excited for you and so jealous that youre seeing New Girl for the first time, I KNEW you'd love it and girl, buckle up bc it just gets better and better. 🥰 It has one of my favorite romantic moments and some other absolute gems and well as truly laugh out loud moments too. And I cackled when you mentioned your theory about Schmidt, now I have to go back and rewatch from that POV but I think it totally tracks 🤣🤣

Takes a big person to admit when the jumped the gun

I grew up the same way, and the fact that I was a c cup at 12 yrs old didn't help lol this is why I show so much skin now, and I still struggle at 32 yrs old.

You're gorgeous and you're wonderful. I hope you have fun going out and getting to know people.

You know, you would make an excellent therapist! You have a knack for explaining things well and thoughtfully.

I'm really proud of you.

"Being brave is doing something scared" - I love this!

Keep your head up even when your heart gets heavy.

This is very generous Elly but also i dont think you should feel bad for your very thoughtful response! You processed offline, then came to us with your feelings and interpretation. Even in the video you asked us to be kind, and you spoke only to your experience. If you hadn't said anything, this person would not have had the opportunity to correct the impression that they left. (Plus they misgendered you, so maybe I'm just feeling a little overprotective lol)

No negative thoughts here for you or the commenter. It’s so easy to misconstrue text communication, and so difficult at times to accurately convey one’s thoughts and intentions when writing. This is a learning experience, just like so much of life is. I think it’s great to see apologies and the struggle for understanding one another, because we so often see the exact opposite online. ❤

Delicious and nutritious. 😋

Who's leaving hate comments 😡 i thought that video was great. Inspiring and shows self confidence 💕

I think one factor might be that not all of us here are native English speakers, and at times it can be difficult to be exactly sure how the message will be received when you are expressing in a language that is not your own. Miscommunication happens between people. And that´s ok ❤

We are all human here <3

I'd like to thank you for sharing the video clips of your date. It's very encouraging for others. Plus, please say hi to your wonderful sibling. I miss her funny and thought-provoking YT videos. 😀

EDIT: I've just watched the short, so I retract this comment.

I’ll probably choose to eventually delete today’s chatmas video (because I now regret making it), but I’ll leave it up for a while as context for this apology.

Whatever you want for yourself, I want for you, too. Keep it up! 👏

Noooo!! Not at all what I meant!! Sorry to make you feel like that. For what it's worth, now I feel bad. I am a bit autistic, so I sound wrong sometimes. It was more of thinking "is it completely solo when you do things", because I think about that on my solo dates. Like, am I brave enough to go out without the journal and book (the camera also, because then you're kind of taking US with you, in a way). You know? And I am subbed to you and love your videos!!! ❤❤❤ This is why I also left you a heart!

I ate alone in the food court throughout most of my college years, but I feel as though that--and eating alone in the school cafeteria--doesn't register on people's radar as much as choosing to go to a restaurant with no plans to meet up with anyone else. The latter is more intentional than eating alone at the default eating place while you're a student at an institution of learning. Not just the default eating place, but the only place you usually *can* eat during the school day when you're still in high school. (It just occurred to me that I can't remember how much the preceding sentence is relevant to your life because I can't remember how much of your school career you were homeschooled). Since then the only times at the moment that I can remember eating alone at a restaurant, were when I was a client in the local vocational rehabilitation program and I used to cross the street after appointments and classes and have lunch at a nearby Asian restaurant. At least one of those times I invited a friend that I had made through VR to come with me. And then, more recently--just before Covid hit--I ate alone at a pizza place. That time, the waiter said something like, "Will anyone be joining you tonight?" And yes, that did make me feel a bit awkward. So I can relate to how you felt. I was diagnosed autistic at the age of thirty and am almost forty-six now, and I feel that as I have become aware of the differences between my neurological processing system and most other people's, I have internalized a bit more of society's expectations--to some degree against my will. As I think about it, perhaps this was the reason why I felt more awkward at the pizza place than I did at the Asian restaurant. When I entered the Voc Rehab program shortly after my diagnosis, I still had a level of social obliviousness that I have lost since then, for better or worse. In fact, when I scanned my memory bank for past experiences to share in order to relate to you, the pizza place was the first one that popped into mind and I had to think a bit harder to come up with the Asian place. Probably partly because the former was more recent, but also because it affected me a bit more. As a neurotypical (as far as I know?) and an extrovert (whereas I'm very much an introvert) my guess is that you are far more attuned to society's expectations than I am. So having attention being directed to the fact that you were alone must have been that much more uncomfortable for you. I applaud your courage! Keep on truckin' with your self-love journey, however you see fit. :)

It’s weird to judge how someone is “alone.” There was a period of time where I really worked to go out to eat alone. I almost always watched a video when I did because my “self care” is being able to check out a little. I realized I generally don’t like going out to eat alone bc I need time to “check out” as a full time parent/full time caregiver to my (awesome) kid and eating in a restaurant doesn’t allow me to do that. Instead if I’m alone I’ll eat in my car bc I’m actually alone. Maybe I’ll eat at an outside table at somewhere like Panera where no one is going to talk to me. The other thing I do is order food and when it’s nice I eat alone on my deck. Everyone is going to have a different goal and a lot of people meet their goals differently.

I visited your commentator's channel - a person who does videos in finnish about sewing and scrapbooking, i.e. not the architypical hater/troll. I wonder if her comment is coming across the wrong way due to something being lost in translation? She strikes me as someone who might be very surprised to learn that her post has been construed as a "hate" comment.

You're such an emotionally intelligent person, the video of you taking yourself out has really inspired me to focus more on loving myself . I binged videos from your other channel when I was going through a really hard time in my life and now adore this channel here. You've come so far and I'm proud of you. You're one of my favourite UA-camrs and Always look forward to your videos.

I don't love that you got a hate comment. I do love how you responded to it with self love, vulnerability and strength. Keep doing you!

I've never been brave enough to eat out in public alone. I can barely get a table and wait for a friend to show up It's your solo date, do it how the hell you want 💜

I love and support solo dates so much! You inspire me to keep making self-love a priority. Online community is absolutely real community. ❤ That commenter seems to have an odd idea about what makes something a "real" date. A couple's date doesn't become less real or (less monogamous) if the couple shares parts of it online. 🤷‍♀️ I'm glad you left the video up. ❤

I’m so sorry you had that interaction with a hater. I’m so proud of you and solo dates are super brave…I’m not brave enough to do that. I literally hate leaving my house. Not to mention, journaling in public on a solo date…I’m just not there yet! You’re really brave and inspirational. You deserve self care. Sending you love❤

honestly being comfortable with yourself is of such import, it seems worth it to conquer any percieved awkwardness. And that person knows exactly what they were doing. It's good to give someone the benefit of the doubt but with that wording, it's hard to see how it could be meant in any way other than being discourging. Thank you for talking about this and i hope more people find insight or new perspective from watching your stuff. Cheers and good holidays to ya 😊