Whenever I look at alternate history I tend to think: this is stupid. But then I remember that a dude said “hey I’m Jesus’ bro” and caused the deadliest civil conflict in history.
@@TravisBroski are you referring to the video cus I tried to understand the story but still don't have even the slightest understanding, did he claimed that he's jesus or something? Honestly can someone sum it up i don't understand
Lol thats why china is thriving now despite their bloody past. China will be china no matter who is in charge, be it the capitalist or the communists they will still be the same.
@@Zeerich-yx9po If china got rid of its censorship I can assure you theres gonna be some entertaining bangers with its entertainment considering how bizzare it is.
Chinese history in a nutshell: >Xin Wow rebellion >caused by minor disagreement between two cabbage merchants >casualties and losses: 70 million deaths, the last known surviving brontosaurus, and the disbandment of the Jedi Council
I remember finding it so depressing when I first read about it. This is basically what happens when a religious cult becomes powerful enough to cause harm on a large scale.
@@drivebypoet that is why Falun Gong was persecuted btw, not to defend the CCP but they got real scared when their members numbered in the millions (over 100 million)
@@sw36jl Unlike the dude that started the rebelion in the video they don't preach the overthrow of government and killing a entire ethnic group (correct me if im wrong though, I'm not well educated on it) . Personally I think CCP did it to further thier own power and advance the police state they got. If by the logic of just numbers alone, Christians, and the like should be prosecuted too (argument can be made that they were prosecuted in the past). And still, it doesn't justify, arresting people, disappearing people and harvesting thier organs.
@@culkaiy7395 Police state that serves to oppress genuine criticism and serve the ruling party's intrest. If they can arrest or dissappear people for criticism of the government, then it's too much. Even I, as a leftist ( the European, allmost socialist kind, not the American "left" ) find a lot of CCPs actions extremely authoritarian and unjustifiable.
You left out the detail that both German and American governments considered helping out Hong for the purpose of creating a Christian China. Until they actually met the guy and picked up on the fact Hong had never seen a Bible in his entire life.
How is it possible that he managed to preach and fool everyone in China when he never even read the Bible? I thought Hong met some missionaries, don't they give you free bibles or something similar to spread christianity?
Hong preached his own strange mythology, which drew from quasi-Christian themes. He also claimed to be descended from Noah lmao Edit: Yes, I realise that many Christians believe that everyone is descended from Noah..
@@mmr_2538 Lotta guys who joined him weren’t super crazy about the weird psuedo-christian communes they just hated the Manchus and Qing dynasty. They wanted to see the end of the dynasty, and so a lot of them left after Hong declared himself emperor in Nanking.
they thought it would herald a new christian kingdom until the taipingers started to ask aboit how tall god was and how did he look like an stuff. to them it was like a diety in the chinese pantheon looool
Average Chinese rebellions be like: >Fails an exam >Gets sick and delusional >Proclaims himself as a brother of a certain god's son >Refuses to elabourate the Mandate of Heaven further >Rebels >K/D ratio is higher than the famous artist from Austria >Having ashes incinerated by cannon blast
Classic China - just from time to time it has one of the bloodiest conflicts in the history (if we take into account world population at the time) just by itself
@@unitedstates4912 some of the Dynasties are Founded by Peasants...the Founder of Ming Dynasty (Hongwu Emperor) is once a Beggars in Streets,he ended up Joining Red Turban rebels and eventually Gained total support to Chinese People,he built the Last Chinese Golden Age..he Made lots of Land reforms and Economic Prosperity.. Founder of Tang Dynasty was founded by Taizong,son of the China's Wealthiest family in its Time,He was the most greatest Chinese Emperor throughout History and his reign was the Zenith of China's History... You clearly need to read Chinese History.. The Mandate of Heaven giving Peasants to Overthrow the Dynasty if its was already Corrupt,if they can be successful,the Mandate of Heaven will grant the Leader of Revolution to Rule over Centuries, if he was a Competent ruler his Dynasty will Lasts longer.. Poor,Rich and even Barbarians can Claim the Mandate of Heaven..it is becuase the Imperial Education in Confucian China is too Open for all Individual.. Unlike Europe all peasant uprising is always a failure becuase the Education is mostly available to rich class only
In this case, reality's limits were pushed to the edge by human stupidity. This amount of stupidity is far beyond imagination to the point that it almost doesn't seem real, but it is.
"Hong's ashes were later blasted out of a cannon in order to ensure that his remains have no resting place as eternal punishment for the uprising." Well, at least he went out with a bang.
@Monsecko actually not true, WW2 death total is about 45 million, this war’s estimated death toll is between 20-30 million, however some estimates are up to 100 million+. But when your civil war has some people estimating that your war had over twice as many deaths as WW2, it’s a normal Chinese civil war
There were a ton of factors other than Hong that caused the revolt- poverty, oppression by the Qing, etc. People just tend to rally around charismatic figures who promise change
@@LautaroArgentino I mean, they were literally Manchurians who occupied the country after defeating the Ming, they weren't Han. Fun fact, they also forced people to wear pigtails for some reason.
Chinese dynastic cycle starter pack: - Steppe nomads invade - A religious secret society, whose members practice martial arts, launches a revolt named after the color of their headdress - The yellow river floods - A general revolts, because the emperor recalled him to the capital - The peasants revolt, because the emperor keeps conscripting them to build huge palaces - The peasants abandon their land and become bandits in the mountains - The emperor drinks mercury, hoping it will make him immortal (it doesn't) - The emperor has no heir - The emperor has too many heirs - Eunuchs install a puppet emperor - Warlord period - Vietnam declares independence
@@khai96x well independence or trying to invade Vietnam and came out with a bloody nose, thousand soldiers and a few fleets got speared because they don’t learn the first time Vietnam did it or died of jungle diseases like usual. Basically the China dynasties experience in Vietnam.
The higher estimates can also go up to 70 mil counting the immediate purges and the plague outbreak after the rebellion failed. There's also a minority that go even higher to say 100 mil though that is a new estimate. Nutty.
@@comradecetacean1927 pretty sure many people throughout history claimed prophethood yet faded into obscurity. The significance of a claimed prophethood on people lives varies and depends on whether people even accept them to begin with, among other factors.
@@alexting827 By a factor of between 5 and 16. Yeah, the Holocaust wasn't really anything too special when it comes to death toll either by number ot percentage of population, it's mostly how ruthlessly intentional it is; like an engineered famine is easy enough to do - you just make sure all the things that normally should happen, don't (either by design or incompetance) and the victims are spread out over a wide area. The Holocaust on the other hand had most of it's victims dying directly at the hands of humans and was mostly contained to a few areas so the piles of corpses were plain to see. Still fucked up though, don't get me wrong, just gets a bit overblown in the history of human tragedy.
It's extra funny when you consider that Hong Xiuquan started off as a guy who had pretty good grades but failed his imperial civil service exams in Guangzhou twice, got a leaflet from a Christian missionary, failed the exam again (it was a hard exam), then had a nervous breakdown before dreaming about having God and Jesus being his family and telling him to slay demons.
@@alessandrodebonis4888 As Chinese you will understand it’s just a norm. Chinese history is just old dynasty performed poorly, new rebellion strives, civil war is just an inescapable event.
Not true. They committed horrible war crimes and there was no recovery from that. All discipline was gone and they were hated by a good part of the country. That's why a new army headed by Yuan was started.
Chinese history be like: -A 6 years old boy falls over a banana peel, proceeds to vow vengeance. -Years later, the boy, now an adult, passed the official exam and became the lord for his own town. Banned the selling of banana. -Unhappy with the ban, many in his town took up arms to overthrow the lord. The minor civil war soon escalated into a full blown revolution that saw the rebellions overthrowing the capital to establish a new Chinese dynasty. -Total casualties: 500M
@@hunterofdarkness8329 and people complain about the ccp being authoritarian, bruh they are the ones that know how much of a based people the chinese are
@@michaeltagor4238 Opressing people, silencing opinions, doing what is good for the government with no regards for the population? Ngl that sounds based as hell man
Funfact: Western Missionaries were thrilled that a christian focused nation exists, they'll try to help them. When they arrived and stayed in nangking, most of them were utterly traumatized or mentally devastated. A missionary, Divie Bethune McCartee says: "I see no christianity in nangking." One foreign director says: "There is no avail in the spread of Christianity - worse than useless."
@@taekai4279 He had. His belief in Christianity came from first having convulsions and fever dreams after failing his third imperial examination, then reading a pamphlet about Christianity and later meeting with a Southern Baptist reverend... He later wrote his own version of the Bible based on Karl Gützlaff's translation of the old and new testament.
Muricans:our civil war had 100.000 deaths Mexican:ours had 250.000 deaths Pain but there is a s before the p: rookie number we had 500.000 death, how many do you china ? China:yes
@@sombodythatyouusedtoknow9046 Americans had almost half a million dead so your really doing a disservice to the American civil war especially since the US had a significantly lower population than that of China at the time.
@@tellme5167 A half million deaths & more, and it was a bloodbath. Now compared to China which always have more zeroes that other country counterparts. I don't know what to call it anymore.
@@MrJumpingson Even with little arable land, whatever little amount of it China has has very fertile soil and are usually located close to large rivers, meaning they are easily irrigated and could output tons of crops. This is why China historically has much more people than others, and they often bounce back easily after devastating events, such as epidemics, natural disasters, and wars. This amount of people also contributed to the ridiculous number of war deaths, as armies were large and wars often cause famines.
@@MrJumpingson their wisdom+intelligence stats are high as hell for the time, so better agriculture techniques and living spaces. Good RNG too, since there's alot of fertile land in china
@@eugeneflores6153 Virgin French baguette and English tea sipping 100 years war basically slap fighting vs Chad Chinese short Taiping rebellion with brother of Christ ending in more deaths than WW1
having learnt this in Chinese during 9th grade I can say that it's even more bizzare when you consider all the names lack in aesthetic values that normal titles of places and organisations at that time normally have. It's straight up a bootleg state using bootleg names and bootleg titles all based on some shit a random Chinese farmer hallucinated after hearing what Christianity is supposed to be
@@AB-dm1wz They basically mean that in this time period, organizations and places sound nice, fancy with deep meanings and what not. While the names in his organization sounds like a fourth grader made it. For example: one of the titles was 翼王五千歲; lit. 'Lord of Five Thousand Years Which sounds stupid if you think about it, but I'm not too sure since I'm not a history nerd.
@@zennoix9984 hey, if it works it f*cking works -CCP And honestly, it's better than some war broke out and a bunch of American twitter libtards posting stuff abt it despite not knowing anything abt it -Me
@@zennoix9984 That's why every single chinese government ever (even the RoC that is liked by foreigners more than the chinese for some reason) was authoritarian. Even if the CCP somehow collapsed tomorow chances are it would be taken over by local lords and turned into another authoritarian regime.
@@zennoix9984I don't want to know what's going to happen once a new civil war erupts against the CCP. We live in 2020s so it might start over the fact that kpop is getting restricted. Some wild bts stan is going to start another 50 years war with 70-90 million casualties.
True, American history is so boring to me cuz it's so short and I learn the same things for 10 years. I really only started liking history when I watched videos of European. Middle Eastern and Chinese history
@@johnnyjoestar5193 >He doesn’t think revolutionaries enlisting the help of literal pirates, natives and criminals against the worlds strongest army is cool
"So, you begin in a tavern..." *The players standing amidst ruins of the entire country, and 40 million dead, 70 million starving, innumerable, horrid war-crimes later...* "Woo! We saved the world!"
"Your faction to bring about a more religiously inclusive China meets stiff resistance from the emperor" "I open peaceful negotiations" "Roll for charisma" *Rolls 1* "You declare yourself the brother of Christ and start the bloodiest civil war of history" "Goddammit!" "Hey! That's your brother you're talking about!"
Well I guess but instead of some demon or whatever from some outer dimension wanting to kill or enslave everyone but can usually be defeated by things like *feel good narrative contrivances, empowerment fantasy, and the classic power of friendship,* your players greatest challenge is *society itself,* and them realizing they on their own are utterly powerless to enact meaningful, lasting changes. This makes me realize we REALLY need more fantasy fiction focused on building *solidarity* to realize true, meaningful changes to the status quo.
@@bodo-bing Bard player: Damn it! See this is why y'all should've let me seduce the *"dowager empress"* or atleast all the generals of the armies, BUT NO!
-Hong declared himself the Heavenly King of the Heavenly Kingdom of Peace. -The Taiping rebels were seen chanting while slaughtering the Manchus in Hefei. -After capturing Nanjing, Taiping forces killed about 40,000 Manchu civilians. "if you want peace, prepare to massacre Manchus" -Hong Xiuquan.
China be like: - Minor dispute on why green should be someone’s favorite color - 72 million casualties, war lasts for 206 years, three dynasties form and collapse
@@lorenzorojasv WW1 is generally said to have had about 20 million casualties, the Asian theater having the conservative number at 25 million, the low estimate of the Taiping Rebellion is about 30 million with the consensus being somewhere between 30 million to 50 million with a high end of 70 million casualties. The discrepancy because there was a massive amount of deportations, famine and cities being wiped out. Another estimated 30 million also became refugees. There was literally a point where the Qing were executing 300,000 people a day after the rebellion with the Hakka genocide. It's not surprising that a total war in China would hit those numbers, also noting that the Pacific War didn't last nearly as long or penetrate as deep into China.
@@hyperion3145 IIRC, official number for chineese losses in WW2 is 35 million (because japaneese commited real genocide of chineese) - and that's not counting all other losses on Asian theatre.
@@thedreamscripter4002 wasn't a huge part of China's losses from them braking a dam on one if the major rivers to try and slow the Japanese, but it only ending up killing a ton of Chinese civies?
You should make one about how the Han Dynasty started because a sheriff was transporting prisoners and some managed to escape. And because the penalty for allowing prisoners to escape was death he decided “fuck it” and just freed the rest of the prisoners and led a rebellion against the government.
Fun fact: this was actually the SECOND time a massive civil war was fought over religion in China. 2,000 years ago, a group of peasants revolted against the Eastern Han Dynasty, leading into the Three Kingdoms period. It's called the "Yellow Turban Rebellion" because the rebels wore yellow scarves as headbands. The peasants were associated with secret Taoist societies and there might have been cannibalism involved. 8 million died, the deadliest conflict in world history until _another_ Chinese rebellion, the An Lushan Rebellion, surpassed it 600 years later. Of course, don't get that confused with the _Red_ Turban Rebellion, which was the rebellion to overthrow the Mongol Yuan Dynasty. A thousand years later. There was also a religious cult but Buddhist. China, amirite?
As a Chinese history buff we need to be clear that the Yellow Turban Rebellion was NOT caused over religious reasons. Peasants were being unfairly taxed by corrupt Eunuchs controlling the government and coupled with bad natural conditions for farming, they had no money and no food to eat so they had no choice to rebel. Many peasants involved were taoist but it wasn’t a religious war. It was a rebellion for equality and justice and the peasants lost unfortunately Religion was used as a cover/excuse to rally the people and fight corruption
Confucius was definitely responsible for this, remember the reason why this guy did this entire Civil War was due to him failing an Government exam which was created by Confucius.
Fun fact: the song in the video, “Cup of Solid Gold,” was adopted as the Qing Dynasty’s anthem… a few days before the dynasty collapsed. It was never performed in public. Ironically, the song expresses hope for peace and stability.
Nope, that’s totally untrue. What you said about the anthem is true, but this isn’t that song. It just happened to be included as an extended orchestral section in the most-viewed video of the anthem on UA-cam, but it has nothing to do with the actual anthem which was way shorter.
@@timesnewlogan2032 it's part of an orchestra in taiwan that performed cup of solid gold along with several other traditional chinese songs. in that video, the actual anthem only goes up to 1:20 i think
As a Chinese, I can confirm, that this Hong Xiu Quan（洪秀全）is mad Btw fun fact of Mr Hong: Hong was a great nerd but then he failed so many times during exam (4 times) that he got mad and decided to be a Christian and start a rebellion because he thought the exam system was rubbish. And for a whole fucking rebellion. True story.
@@headlander7119 Look up Tomb of Christ Japan, basically, Jesus japanese brother Isikuri died for him on the cross and then the real Jesus died on japan, so there's a tomb dedicated to him and his brother there.
Citizens is the wrong word, China only had concepts of "citizens" during the early Shang and Zhou eras where people who lived in walled cities were considered a different social class from those who did not, similar to ancient Greece. During the Qing it should be "subjects".
I still don't understand how China got tons of civil wars since the dawn of it's history, with casuallities of millions and millions each civil war, and still it's population keeps growing and growing.
Well you see, fertile land for a very fertile crop (rice) combined with river highways that allow for rapid movement of agricultural products combined with one of the largest literate populations in the world (due to the aforementioned civil servant exams) in conjunction with one of the most efficient centralized administrations in the world (for the time period), generally results in rather large populations.
Less people to feed. But what blows my mind is Russia has a similar history but for most of the year they can't grow shit due to the frozen ground and yet still can pull millions out of thin air
They actually have a demographic crisis now ironically. The Chinese government is struggling to get people to have kids. Extra ironic was how massive wars with millions dead can't depopulate the country but the one-child policy (and other factors) can.
@@danshakuimo Couple this with a changing family culture by the Zoomer-generation Chinese who now prefer job security over family, and not even the one-child policy alone could depopulate East Asia in a few decades' time (note: this trend is also seen in young Japanese and Koreans, hence my use of "East Asia" instead of just China).
I remember having to learn this in middle school Chinese history class. I hated this part so much because I failed, didn't even realise it has so much meme potential.
@@NIDELLANEUM The older stuff is amazing. Like the guy who I forget name of but was famous for being strong. So fought a enemy army by grabbing two of enemy and wielding them like weapons. I think it was his final battle but not sure. I doubt it's even a exaggeration that the guy could wield other humans as weapons since super strength is just a rare genetic condition. We even have a a tleast one living example in Dennis Rogers, dude would be a legend if was born before the gun.
How do you even begin to breakdown a plot regarding British drug cartels, the second coming of Jesus, and the bloodiest civil war in history resulting in… literally no change besides being a little bit weaker.
Chinese civil war starter pack: -Wait for natural disasters to happen -Fail the imperial examinations system -Claim to be related to someone important born centuries ago -Found a revolutionary religious movement
@@ramtwo-marro1463The Huang Chao(黄巢) rebellion happend in 9th century AD was also due to similar reasons, and it killed tens of millions of people and almost ended China's second prosperous age, the Tang Dynasty.
@@ramtwo-marro1463And another similar thing happened in the next Song Dynasty. Zhang Yuan(张元), a failed scholar, rebelled and joined Xixia and helped Xixia defeat Song's army.
Decisive Imperial Victory! the very next week: this dynasty was overthrown by the roommate of the second cousin of the son of the emperor's least favorite concubine
Chinese civil wars be like: Casus belli: Minor political misunderstanding Result: Decisive victory Casualties: 30,000,000,000 Territorial changes: None
My 7th generational grandfather was a general in Hong Xiuquan's army, we have his records kept at my family's temple in Huế. Apparently, he was actually an illegitimate son of Hong himself.
@@vaninhhuu3215 The story I have been told is that my 7th generational grandfather was sent to Vietnam by his father, most likely to purchase guns from the Nguyen Dynasty. However, he just decided to stay in Vietnam and not return back to his father. My guess is that he likely saw that his father was a mad man and didn't want to be apart of his losing war. He married with the locals and boom, that's how me, a Vietnamese has Hong as my direct ancestor.
The best part is: We write everything down as an official “you have to do it” thing. Every dynasty must claim their legitimacy by “inheriting” the legacy of the former, and by recounting their predecessors fate, they solidify the reason why the mandate of heaven has chosen them to rule China (Some narrative fuckery is to be expected, but that tends to be near the end when the civil war happens). China has produced and retained the most comprehensive collection of orthodox historic records covering the time span of 3000 years, collectively known as 二十四史“Twenty-Four Histories”, amazing feat given how bloody and destructive the civil wars tend to be (and indeed the more tumultuous times like the post-Han and post-Tang years tend to be a bit hazy). Some of the finest literature in Chinese language were created among them.
@@comradekenobi6908 Indeed they were, there was a whole chamber of scholars in the imperial court dedicated to that, called 史官/太史. The position has existed since the first mythical Chinese dynasty; it's an enduring and noble tradition. They are tasked with combing through all records of the previous dynasty and compiling the orthodox history (正史). They also have personnel who record every notable event in the imperial court (起居注) and, of course, around the nation. Ever so diligent, every hour of every day, too bad the daily records before the Qing dynasty (pre 17th century) are mostly lost. Only sporadic chapters remain, like the sole survivor of the Tang daily records of 357 days between 617 AD and 618 AD (大唐創業起居注). It's pretty understandable since they are deemed trivial and serve as crude material to be edited in orthodox history.
@@comradekenobi6908 No printing technology and its nature as an imperial tradition mean its distribution copy number was small. The material they were written on was fragile and didn't tend to survive fires, which happens a lot during turmoil. Not to mention intentional sabotage by invaders who don't care about history or fear their effect. Ancient recorded knowledge being lost to history was not rare, it was the norm; the burning of the Library of Alexandria comes to mind, and the loss of the House of Wisdom in Baghdad. The entire tradition of Classic Greek and Roman knowledge was lost in Europe during the middle ages, were it not for the Arabic people to the East who recorded them, they would've been lost forever too. Like I've said before, having a relatively continuous collection still surviving today is nothing short of miraculous already.
The Qing army was actually kind of good in this though, a lot of their generals adopted some modern tactics and won major victories near the end, but then the incompetent imperial court hindered any actual progress in a modernized army later during the first sino Japanese war.
An advisor told the Emperor to not modernize or upkeep the army because believing it useless, and instead focusing on funding to relief natural disaster just before the outbreak of First Sino Japanese war
That's not really fair to Qing. Wikipedia Self-Strengthening Movement, Beiyang army, Beiyang fleet. They did make a serious effort to modernise militarily during much of the 19th century. The reasons for their failure aren't as simple as lack of trying.
90 million dead 200 million injured led to: extreme famine, collapse of advanced agriculture, tartar invasion of the lao gan ma province, total societal anarchy for 3000 year outcome: complete 大乳房 dynasty victory
The thing that really amazes me with Chinese history is how this country can utterly destroy itself to then reborn as the most powerful country on earth one or two centuries later like nothing happened.
So many people with a unique culture that’s benefits everyone when they work together. Different from the European/American culture, which works best when people have independence.
They actually came within 40 miles of the Capital at one point during the Rebellion. Think about it 40 miles made the difference between us and having products that said “Made in the Heavenly Kingdom” on it
To add, it was because a general leaving from the capital had decided to turn around and go back to fight last minute that the Heavenly Kingdom forces had been stopped at all. Talk about a close call
There’s also the fact that immediately after the war ended, the Qing dynasty mobilised death squads to execute any and all Hakka people. 1,000,000 people were killed in the Guangdong providence with up to 30,000 murders a day and the raising and destruction of hundreds of villages
ok now who is going to write the transmigration novel where our mc reincarnates into hong xiuquan and has to successfully become the self declared brother of jesus
I love how the «Cup of Solid Gold» plays on the background. Fun fact: This song became the official anthem of the Qing dynasty on 4 October 1911 and got de facto relinquished just 6 days later. And the song also has never been performed on public.
this version is also, in fact, not the real version of Cup of Solid Gold, which's original version is actually less than a minute long. This version i think was made for some Taiwanese opera but dont take my word for it. still real version in my heart
Meanwhile European history be like: War of glockenschieble succession between Franz xavier von conratzgson the 8th and Wiltgelm von maxime Casualties: 20 and a half from combat, 3 million from disease, pogroms in glockenscheible for the 6th time this week
I remember reading the whole Wikipedia article on this and I can still remember more than half the snippets shown without having to pause the video every now and then to read it. Man, what a civil war that was.
@@RoseKingSiegfried They were even thinking all that sci fi shit was powered by child sacrifices and shit too lol. Like when orphanages were being built, they were thinking the Europeans were taking all these kids for hellish machinery.
@@jgraaay18 Yep, straight up. Rail ways were fucking up the Feng Shui and Telephone poles were upsetting the chi and shit. Funny enough, Boxers were fucking these things up and making western efforts very hard for those stupid reasons.
@@MrJumpingson man, if I fail UPSC 2-3 times..... I think thats it. I am going to the history books of India or maybe the world. Thats some wild shit baby!!
@@johnlop7763 I'm not sure what drugs you (as an asian person) would need to claim yourself to be the brother of jesus in the Q I N G dynasty (note: that is almost 2000 years after 0 BCE) but it must be pretty heavy drugs
@@alexting827 he must have a Very serious mental breakdown like I get that he failed 3 times but is it really necessary to proclaim yourself as Jesus Christ second brother lol
He wasn't even proclaimimg to be a devout Christian lol He just took a title from the most famous religious figure and peasants seeing he was charismatic and done with the government anyway decided to support him
@@comradekenobi6908 the peasant probably don't buy it but Hong had way with word probably like this "How do you do fellow Hakka? Want genocide sum Manchu demon?"
"This game's lore is confusing & unrealistic"
Real life lore:
Whenever I look at alternate history I tend to think: this is stupid.
But then I remember that a dude said “hey I’m Jesus’ bro” and caused the deadliest civil conflict in history.
@@TravisBroski When reality(or in this case, history) chose to be stranger than fictions.
@@TravisBroski are you referring to the video cus I tried to understand the story but still don't have even the slightest understanding, did he claimed that he's jesus or something? Honestly can someone sum it up i don't understand
@@michaeltagor4238 he claimed himself to be Jesus' secret younger brother, big G God's 2nd son
and then tried to make a new Heaven from China
@@tranquoccuong890-its-orge heaven... with opium
Chinese civil wars be like:
Cause of war: dispute over farmland boundaries
Casualties: 87 trillion dead
Length of war: 112 years
@@mrbisshie decisive victory*
Killing the landlords and give the land to peasants is pretty based
The blue panda society control guanxi
@@larshofler8298 average commie
also at least 100k Koreans eaten
The more you learn about Chinese history, the more you feel like "...what?"
Watching all those Chinese fantasy series does the same effect.
Lol thats why china is thriving now despite their bloody past. China will be china no matter who is in charge, be it the capitalist or the communists they will still be the same.
@@carl4243 true china will forever be rich and prosperity no matter what
@@Zeerich-yx9po If china got rid of its censorship I can assure you theres gonna be some entertaining bangers with its entertainment considering how bizzare it is.
@@Zeerich-yx9po hey if that's the way they get their chikchings flowing....
Chinese history in a nutshell:
>Xin Wow rebellion
>caused by minor disagreement between two cabbage merchants
>casualties and losses: 70 million deaths, the last known surviving brontosaurus, and the disbandment of the Jedi Council
That's Acurate
Quality comment.
"Disbandment of the Jedi Council" HAHAHA!
MY CABBAGES!
At least it wasn't two rice farmers. Otherwise the Earth would have returned to the pre-historic state.
Taiping Rebellion is really one of the craziest events in human history.
I remember finding it so depressing when I first read about it. This is basically what happens when a religious cult becomes powerful enough to cause harm on a large scale.
@@drivebypoet that is why Falun Gong was persecuted btw, not to defend the CCP but they got real scared when their members numbered in the millions (over 100 million)
@@sw36jl Unlike the dude that started the rebelion in the video they don't preach the overthrow of government and killing a entire ethnic group (correct me if im wrong though, I'm not well educated on it) . Personally I think CCP did it to further thier own power and advance the police state they got. If by the logic of just numbers alone, Christians, and the like should be prosecuted too (argument can be made that they were prosecuted in the past). And still, it doesn't justify, arresting people, disappearing people and harvesting thier organs.
@@petarspajic7648 "police state" at this point is just proyection man
@@culkaiy7395 Police state that serves to oppress genuine criticism and serve the ruling party's intrest. If they can arrest or dissappear people for criticism of the government, then it's too much. Even I, as a leftist ( the European, allmost socialist kind, not the American "left" ) find a lot of CCPs actions extremely authoritarian and unjustifiable.
You left out the detail that both German and American governments considered helping out Hong for the purpose of creating a Christian China. Until they actually met the guy and picked up on the fact Hong had never seen a Bible in his entire life.
the crazy tactics were also a problem.
How is it possible that he managed to preach and fool everyone in China when he never even read the Bible? I thought Hong met some missionaries, don't they give you free bibles or something similar to spread christianity?
Hong preached his own strange mythology, which drew from quasi-Christian themes. He also claimed to be descended from Noah lmao
Edit: Yes, I realise that many Christians believe that everyone is descended from Noah..
@@calebp6114 Brother of Jesus, Descendant of Noah..... I wonder how Hong family tree system works lol
@@mmr_2538
Lotta guys who joined him weren’t super crazy about the weird psuedo-christian communes they just hated the Manchus and Qing dynasty.
They wanted to see the end of the dynasty, and so a lot of them left after Hong declared himself emperor in Nanking.
I love the fact that the French decided to be part of this black hole of logic
Where there is death, you might find the British and French
@@johnnyjoestar5193 so you are saying they are vultures? That is a pretty accurate description
They and other Europeans did seem to like dabbing on the Qing.
they thought it would herald a new christian kingdom until the taipingers started to ask aboit how tall god was and how did he look like an stuff. to them it was like a diety in the chinese pantheon looool
@@shashakomairos4131
I mean they scavenge the remains of an tragic aftermath
Average Chinese rebellions be like:
>Fails an exam
>Gets sick and delusional
>Proclaims himself as a brother of a certain god's son
>Refuses to elabourate the Mandate of Heaven further
>Rebels
>K/D ratio is higher than the famous artist from Austria
>Having ashes incinerated by cannon blast
By changinh few words, you'll got Mao Zedong.
Don't forget the "gets sick and delusional" in there
> Kills more than Hitler.
> Dies and walks away.
> Not further Explanations.
but he is not artist yet
Jesus ain’t God
Its like a family guy cutaway
"Hey Lois, rememeber when I posed as the Chinese brother of Jesus and commited the worst war ever?"
This needs to be in family guy
I read that in peter's voice
About as funny as Family Guy, too.
@@timesnewlogan2032 this is too funny of a joke to be in family guy
It genuinely does sound that bizarre.
This is one of the bloodiest conflicts in the history of mankind, by the way.
imagine being one of the 20-30 million casualties and the conflict that caused your death only being remembered as a meme
Classic China - just from time to time it has one of the bloodiest conflicts in the history (if we take into account world population at the time) just by itself
Brother of jesus bro💀💀
seconf bloodiest after ww2
China in 100AD lost 50,000,000 in a war lmao
China be like:
"minor civil war"
"30 million causalities"
they always start for the stupidest reasons because the population always wants to rebel but they never actually make a proper cause themselves
@@unitedstates4912
Man gets no scoped
*WW1 starts*
“The deadliest famine in human history occurred in China leaving 40 million dead”
China: this is just Friday
@@proger1960 An Austrian fails arts exam in Germany: I WILL NEVER FORGIVE THE JEWS!!!
*Proceeds to attack Russia for some reason*
@@unitedstates4912 some of the Dynasties are Founded by Peasants...the Founder of Ming Dynasty (Hongwu Emperor) is once a Beggars in Streets,he ended up Joining Red Turban rebels and eventually Gained total support to Chinese People,he built the Last Chinese Golden Age..he Made lots of Land reforms and Economic Prosperity..
Founder of Tang Dynasty was founded by Taizong,son of the China's Wealthiest family in its Time,He was the most greatest Chinese Emperor throughout History and his reign was the Zenith of China's History...
You clearly need to read Chinese History..
The Mandate of Heaven giving Peasants to Overthrow the Dynasty if its was already Corrupt,if they can be successful,the Mandate of Heaven will grant the Leader of Revolution to Rule over Centuries, if he was a Competent ruler his Dynasty will Lasts longer..
Poor,Rich and even Barbarians can Claim the Mandate of Heaven..it is becuase the Imperial Education in Confucian China is too Open for all Individual..
Unlike Europe all peasant uprising is always a failure becuase the Education is mostly available to rich class only
Fiction is limited by human imagination. Reality is limited by human stupidity. This is why reality is usually stranger than fiction.
Can I borrow that?
@@SlightlyDerangedCubewhy borrow when you can steal
@@hypetrailohhh like England
In this case, reality's limits were pushed to the edge by human stupidity. This amount of stupidity is far beyond imagination to the point that it almost doesn't seem real, but it is.
Please forgive me for being an English man here, cuz I'm stealing the heck outta that
"Hong's ashes were later blasted out of a cannon in order to ensure that his remains have no resting place as eternal punishment for the uprising."
Well, at least he went out with a bang.
Jesus what an epic death lmfao. Country's biggest troll
Dayum son.
@@TheSignatureK no the names spelled Dam Son.
@@gavins9846 to be fair he actually died of "eating wild vegetables".
Dude just said one sentence and committed one of the most horrifying history of mankind
I don't think this video really stressed how this war had more casualties than the entirety of WWI
WW II even
@Monsecko actually not true, WW2 death total is about 45 million, this war’s estimated death toll is between 20-30 million, however some estimates are up to 100 million+. But when your civil war has some people estimating that your war had over twice as many deaths as WW2, it’s a normal Chinese civil war
@@noinfo1018 And also don't forget WW1 and 2 is a LITERAL GLOBAL CONFLICT LIKE WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK CHINA
@@noinfo1018 basically what I said. 80mill dead after the chinese civil war compared to the 45 million WW II
@@JetStreamSheet540 “Never fight a land war in Asia”
Kinda crazy how a single guy can tank a huge country like this.
when leaders are soo currupt and inept,any excuse is good to revolt
@@FULANODETAL Bingo. Dude may have been a profligate and a religious nutjob, but his politics were better than the emperor's lol
There were a ton of factors other than Hong that caused the revolt- poverty, oppression by the Qing, etc. People just tend to rally around charismatic figures who promise change
@@treyebillups8602 also the Qing were seen as foreing invaders.
@@LautaroArgentino I mean, they were literally Manchurians who occupied the country after defeating the Ming, they weren't Han. Fun fact, they also forced people to wear pigtails for some reason.
>10 million combatants
>30 million casualties
Wat how
Massacre of civilians on each side
warcrimes time
you can kill people who aren't fighting
I think this kind of war destroys the trade and agriculture to where millions starve without direct violence against them.
@@The105ODST 💀
Chinese dynastic cycle starter pack:
- Steppe nomads invade
- A religious secret society, whose members practice martial arts, launches a revolt named after the color of their headdress
- The yellow river floods
- A general revolts, because the emperor recalled him to the capital
- The peasants revolt, because the emperor keeps conscripting them to build huge palaces
- The peasants abandon their land and become bandits in the mountains
- The emperor drinks mercury, hoping it will make him immortal (it doesn't)
- The emperor has no heir
- The emperor has too many heirs
- Eunuchs install a puppet emperor
- Warlord period
- Vietnam declares independence
Does Vietnam have anything to do with Chinese dynastic cycle?
@@khai96x well independence or trying to invade Vietnam and came out with a bloody nose, thousand soldiers and a few fleets got speared because they don’t learn the first time Vietnam did it or died of jungle diseases like usual. Basically the China dynasties experience in Vietnam.
@@phuct4980 What I mean is: Does any of their many conflicts with Vietnam destabilize a Chinese dynasty?
don't forget Japanese pirates
@@khai96x Possibly, cause lost of manpower
Jesus of Nazareth vs. bing chilling of taiping
Truely bing chilling moment
The most intense battle in the universe
@@skullcrusher6975 Sounds very opium dealer to me
@@1000eau I was literally about to say the same thing 😂
Im chinese and this is fucking hilarious
It's a shame how many people in the west don't know how hardcore chinese history actually is.
Yes like eating your own civlians and then each other during a sieg.
@@Andrewza1 that used to happen everywhere my dude anytime a siege was being done it was a strong g possibility that cannibalism would show up.
@@justinallen2408 Okay hold on. Was it not exceptionally rare? Sure. But did it "happen everywhere" as if it were somewhat common? Ehhhh.
@@beki7408 why bring food to the battlefield when you can become the food - sun tzu
@@Andrewza1 take battle of suiyang for starter
*"I am the brother of Jesus Christ and will create a heavenly kingdom!"*
"bro please just stop buying crack from the anglos."
*opium
China Lore: 30 million people die because someone claims to be the brother of Jesus
The higher estimates can also go up to 70 mil counting the immediate purges and the plague outbreak after the rebellion failed. There's also a minority that go even higher to say 100 mil though that is a new estimate. Nutty.
which is funny because that means on average more peopled died in this "civil war (internal conflict)" than Jews in the holocaust. Surprising
This is universally applicable though, whenever some guy claims to be a prophet/divine being/demigod, millions of people end up dead as a result.
@@comradecetacean1927 pretty sure many people throughout history claimed prophethood yet faded into obscurity.
The significance of a claimed prophethood on people lives varies and depends on whether people even accept them to begin with, among other factors.
@@alexting827 By a factor of between 5 and 16. Yeah, the Holocaust wasn't really anything too special when it comes to death toll either by number ot percentage of population, it's mostly how ruthlessly intentional it is; like an engineered famine is easy enough to do - you just make sure all the things that normally should happen, don't (either by design or incompetance) and the victims are spread out over a wide area. The Holocaust on the other hand had most of it's victims dying directly at the hands of humans and was mostly contained to a few areas so the piles of corpses were plain to see. Still fucked up though, don't get me wrong, just gets a bit overblown in the history of human tragedy.
Be me:
Stub toe on bed
Clearly this signifies the Emperor has lost the Mandate of Heaven
Uprising time
This is now one of my favorite comments on youtube.
This is gold
Casualties: 80 million
You might have just summed up 4000+ years of Chinese history in a nutshell. That Mandate was absurdly easy to be "lost".
Certified EU4 moment
It's extra funny when you consider that Hong Xiuquan started off as a guy who had pretty good grades but failed his imperial civil service exams in Guangzhou twice, got a leaflet from a Christian missionary, failed the exam again (it was a hard exam), then had a nervous breakdown before dreaming about having God and Jesus being his family and telling him to slay demons.
more than 30 million people died for this, sometime history is un-fucking-believable
@@alessandrodebonis4888 As Chinese you will understand it’s just a norm. Chinese history is just old dynasty performed poorly, new rebellion strives, civil war is just an inescapable event.
Not true. They committed horrible war crimes and there was no recovery from that. All discipline was gone and they were hated by a good part of the country. That's why a new army headed by Yuan was started.
Cannot stress how difficult that exam back then was like, most individuals who passed only managed to do so very late in their lives
@@underhorse5367 Weren't there something like 80+ dynasties over recorded Chinese history? Quite a few of which didn't even last 20 years?
Chinese history be like:
-A 6 years old boy falls over a banana peel, proceeds to vow vengeance.
-Years later, the boy, now an adult, passed the official exam and became the lord for his own town. Banned the selling of banana.
-Unhappy with the ban, many in his town took up arms to overthrow the lord. The minor civil war soon escalated into a full blown revolution that saw the rebellions overthrowing the capital to establish a new Chinese dynasty.
-Total casualties: 500M
-Decisive victory
Lit
Chinese: Perfectly normal I don't see any problem
Hahahahhshshs
Shut up and get lost
American: Man, we had such a horrendous civil war, more than 600 THOUSAND people died. So much bloodshed, can you imagine that?
Chinese: Bruh
The funny thing is that they both happened at similar times (1850-1864, 1861-1865).
China history has got to be the most cursed and based human history
@@hunterofdarkness8329 and people complain about the ccp being authoritarian, bruh they are the ones that know how much of a based people the chinese are
@@michaeltagor4238 Opressing people, silencing opinions, doing what is good for the government with no regards for the population? Ngl that sounds based as hell man
@@thegames4565 but this shit is why CCP is so paranoid about rebellions.
Funfact: Western Missionaries were thrilled that a christian focused nation exists, they'll try to help them. When they arrived and stayed in nangking, most of them were utterly traumatized or mentally devastated.
A missionary, Divie Bethune McCartee says:
"I see no christianity in nangking."
One foreign director says: "There is no avail in the spread of Christianity - worse than useless."
Lmao the Chinese man I'm tellin ya
The Chinese is always wild, even today
@@crowbirdryuell they're their own kind of based.
@@lick3227 eating people... Based...
@@esequieltrindade9244 30,000 people eaten
Some random pastor in China: “Hey guys, have you ever heard of this guy named Jesus Christ? He’s kinda chill.”
China:
Imagine being the missionary who gave this guy a Bible. “Hey I’m back in the Yangtze Delta, hope the teachings of the Bible have helped-what the fuck”
@@Kedai610 Poor man is the image of the guy with pizza walking into hell on Earth in his apartment
@@Kedai610 Thing is, Hong Xiuquan had never seen a bible
@@taekai4279 He had. His belief in Christianity came from first having convulsions and fever dreams after failing his third imperial examination, then reading a pamphlet about Christianity and later meeting with a Southern Baptist reverend... He later wrote his own version of the Bible based on Karl Gützlaff's translation of the old and new testament.
@@taekai4279 yes he had
Americans: "Our Civil War was the bloodiest conflict in our history. Like a 100.000 people died"
Chinese: "Ahhh that's so cute"
Muricans:our civil war had 100.000 deaths
Mexican:ours had 250.000 deaths
Pain but there is a s before the p: rookie number we had 500.000 death, how many do you china ?
China:yes
What are you talking about? The American Civil War had 700 000 dead.
100 000 was only the combat-deaths of CSA (not even that quite: 91000)
@@sombodythatyouusedtoknow9046 Americans had almost half a million dead so your really doing a disservice to the American civil war especially since the US had a significantly lower population than that of China at the time.
@@vulpixat2400 apologies, my sources were incorrect
@@tellme5167 A half million deaths & more, and it was a bloodbath.
Now compared to China which always have more zeroes that other country counterparts.
I don't know what to call it anymore.
Civil wars in other regions: 400,000 people died at most.
Civil wars in China: 40 million people died at its lowest casualty estimate.
🤣with so many casualties , I wonder how the hell do they keep having such a population size
@@MrJumpingson There’s just that many of them.
@@MrJumpingson Even with little arable land, whatever little amount of it China has has very fertile soil and are usually located close to large rivers, meaning they are easily irrigated and could output tons of crops.
This is why China historically has much more people than others, and they often bounce back easily after devastating events, such as epidemics, natural disasters, and wars. This amount of people also contributed to the ridiculous number of war deaths, as armies were large and wars often cause famines.
@@MrJumpingson their wisdom+intelligence stats are high as hell for the time, so better agriculture techniques and living spaces. Good RNG too, since there's alot of fertile land in china
@@someyetiwithinternetaccess1253 they got the best class and location 😢
Other countries lore:
"That's my land"
"Nooooo it's mine!"
China lore:
"What the fuck happened and why?"
"Who knows"
Wait isn’t China lore manga stories in general
Othe virgin crybaby countrieS lore Vs Chad China lore
@@eugeneflores6153 Virgin French baguette and English tea sipping 100 years war basically slap fighting vs Chad Chinese short Taiping rebellion with brother of Christ ending in more deaths than WW1
China Really fuck themself for the past 500 year even though they had advance technology At that time
@@wahyusaputra7686 Too many people with such great ambition
having learnt this in Chinese during 9th grade I can say that it's even more bizzare when you consider all the names lack in aesthetic values that normal titles of places and organisations at that time normally have. It's straight up a bootleg state using bootleg names and bootleg titles all based on some shit a random Chinese farmer hallucinated after hearing what Christianity is supposed to be
land of bootleg
How do you mean?
Well, they are Made in China after all.
@@AB-dm1wz They basically mean that in this time period, organizations and places sound nice, fancy with deep meanings and what not. While the names in his organization sounds like a fourth grader made it.
For example: one of the titles was 翼王五千歲; lit. 'Lord of Five Thousand Years
Which sounds stupid if you think about it, but I'm not too sure since I'm not a history nerd.
@@enigmaticenigma7808 What other examples can you provide?
Jesus is gonna be so pissed when he finds out what his brother did
Jesus: Why doesn't my brother look like the people of the Middle East?
Honestly almost every Chinese war is totally fucking crazy
That's why the CCP is so authoritarian today, right?
@@zennoix9984 hey, if it works it f*cking works -CCP
And honestly, it's better than some war broke out and a bunch of American twitter libtards posting stuff abt it despite not knowing anything abt it -Me
@@zennoix9984 That's why every single chinese government ever (even the RoC that is liked by foreigners more than the chinese for some reason) was authoritarian. Even if the CCP somehow collapsed tomorow chances are it would be taken over by local lords and turned into another authoritarian regime.
I hope the upcoming China-US war is even crazier.
@@zennoix9984I don't want to know what's going to happen once a new civil war erupts against the CCP.
We live in 2020s so it might start over the fact that kpop is getting restricted. Some wild bts stan is going to start another 50 years war with 70-90 million casualties.
I've never been a history nerd but I might become one just for Chinese history, this shit is so fascinating.
Same here, there are so much interesting things about their history that we don't know cause they are so ancestral.
China is so large and at times so isolated that their history is like opening a door to another world lmao
True, American history is so boring to me cuz it's so short and I learn the same things for 10 years. I really only started liking history when I watched videos of European. Middle Eastern and Chinese history
My favorite is the guy who used two other guys as weapons in his final battle before he died. When your killing your enemies with your enemies.
@@johnnyjoestar5193 >He doesn’t think revolutionaries enlisting the help of literal pirates, natives and criminals against the worlds strongest army is cool
This was basically a fucking DnD campaign of a war
"So, you begin in a tavern..."
*The players standing amidst ruins of the entire country, and 40 million dead, 70 million starving, innumerable, horrid war-crimes later...*
"Woo! We saved the world!"
When that one player completely derails the campaign but it somehow works
"Your faction to bring about a more religiously inclusive China meets stiff resistance from the emperor"
"I open peaceful negotiations"
"Roll for charisma"
*Rolls 1*
"You declare yourself the brother of Christ and start the bloodiest civil war of history"
"Goddammit!"
"Hey! That's your brother you're talking about!"
Well I guess but instead of some demon or whatever from some outer dimension wanting to kill or enslave everyone but can usually be defeated by things like *feel good narrative contrivances, empowerment fantasy, and the classic power of friendship,* your players greatest challenge is *society itself,* and them realizing they on their own are utterly powerless to enact meaningful, lasting changes.
This makes me realize we REALLY need more fantasy fiction focused on building *solidarity* to realize true, meaningful changes to the status quo.
@@bodo-bing
Bard player: Damn it! See this is why y'all should've let me seduce the *"dowager empress"* or atleast all the generals of the armies, BUT NO!
I almost cried at the part when Hong said "its uprising time" and uprose all over the place. Truly beautiful and poetic.
sames thing happened in every ten years in China 5000 years history
I liked the part where Hong said: "It‘s Morbin’ Time"
Truly one of the rebellions in Chinese history
@@spacedoutorca4550封建统治者们说它是叛乱，但那是人民伟大的斗争
Then 30 million died
-Hong declared himself the Heavenly King of the Heavenly Kingdom of Peace.
-The Taiping rebels were seen chanting while slaughtering the Manchus in Hefei.
-After capturing Nanjing, Taiping forces killed about 40,000 Manchu civilians.
"if you want peace, prepare to massacre Manchus" -Hong Xiuquan.
Making peace by killing Manchus.
Mr. Hong was undeniably based.
Just because he could not pass the goverment exam he went fully genocidal. Just like some funny mustache man
@@KouNagai The true root of mankind evil: *EXAMS*
Fun fact: the revolution sign that be proposed by Sun Yat-sen is "Expel the barbarians, restore the china", in that case the barbarians means Manchus.
@@我想想-e5d The revolutionaries on the one hand hated the manchus, but kept all the territories the manchus conquered. Lmao.
What a wholesome Christmas story
Captures the true spirit of the season🥰
Chinese histories be like:
A "small" dispute over the farmlands
Casualties: 69 millions
@@CasetooClipsGTA lol you're hilarious, this doesn't has anything to do with CCP, Taiping rebellion is infact real.
not nice
@@miyamoto8733 true
@@miyamoto8733 if it involve CCP, maybe. But if it was a past event, i dont think they would
@@dauzlee2827 Chines Nationalists would.
China be like:
- Minor dispute on why green should be someone’s favorite color
- 72 million casualties, war lasts for 206 years, three dynasties form and collapse
Fun fact: This war had more casualties than WW1 and the Asian theater of WW2... Combined...
If you take the most optimistic apropaches to the 2 world wars i guess
@@lorenzorojasv WW1 is generally said to have had about 20 million casualties, the Asian theater having the conservative number at 25 million, the low estimate of the Taiping Rebellion is about 30 million with the consensus being somewhere between 30 million to 50 million with a high end of 70 million casualties. The discrepancy because there was a massive amount of deportations, famine and cities being wiped out. Another estimated 30 million also became refugees.
There was literally a point where the Qing were executing 300,000 people a day after the rebellion with the Hakka genocide. It's not surprising that a total war in China would hit those numbers, also noting that the Pacific War didn't last nearly as long or penetrate as deep into China.
@@hyperion3145 IIRC, official number for chineese losses in WW2 is 35 million (because japaneese commited real genocide of chineese) - and that's not counting all other losses on Asian theatre.
@@thedreamscripter4002 wasn't a huge part of China's losses from them braking a dam on one if the major rivers to try and slow the Japanese, but it only ending up killing a ton of Chinese civies?
@@RipOffProductionsLLC Yes but it worked, scorched earth isn't a new strategy.
I failed to become engineer 2 times already, and I'm pissed off. I feel the guy.
so what's your family relation to jesus christ?
@@l实旅 don't have relation to Jesus, but I surely do believe that my nation and its people's are superior ;)
@@zombie2356 oh no
Joe Cassidy oh shi-
@@zombie2356 if you are from Germany or Japan I am a little scared-
You should make one about how the Han Dynasty started because a sheriff was transporting prisoners and some managed to escape.
And because the penalty for allowing prisoners to escape was death he decided “fuck it” and just freed the rest of the prisoners and led a rebellion against the government.
What the fuck
@@ohboi2119 this video summarize the whole ordeal pretty well. ua-cam.com/video/gpBgawuphf8/v-deo.html
LOL this is Liu Bang story Isn't it?
Lmaoooooo
@@MrStupidarmy nah
Man failing exams in 19th and 20th century were wild
Now you understand why asian parents are on their kid's asses about school
Fun fact: this was actually the SECOND time a massive civil war was fought over religion in China. 2,000 years ago, a group of peasants revolted against the Eastern Han Dynasty, leading into the Three Kingdoms period. It's called the "Yellow Turban Rebellion" because the rebels wore yellow scarves as headbands. The peasants were associated with secret Taoist societies and there might have been cannibalism involved. 8 million died, the deadliest conflict in world history until _another_ Chinese rebellion, the An Lushan Rebellion, surpassed it 600 years later.
Of course, don't get that confused with the _Red_ Turban Rebellion, which was the rebellion to overthrow the Mongol Yuan Dynasty. A thousand years later. There was also a religious cult but Buddhist. China, amirite?
it isn't a Chinese civil war without cannibalism
2nd? are you sure about that?
buh, if you count cult there is wayyyyyy more than 2
As a Chinese history buff we need to be clear that the Yellow Turban Rebellion was NOT caused over religious reasons. Peasants were being unfairly taxed by corrupt Eunuchs controlling the government and coupled with bad natural conditions for farming, they had no money and no food to eat so they had no choice to rebel. Many peasants involved were taoist but it wasn’t a religious war. It was a rebellion for equality and justice and the peasants lost unfortunately
Religion was used as a cover/excuse to rally the people and fight corruption
@@LeechUFC ah taxes, starter of wars
"What the fuck?!"
-Confucius
sadly he died few thousand years ago (probably a good thing otherwise he'd rage quit seeing all this go down)
You can say Confucius was confused
Confucius was definitely responsible for this, remember the reason why this guy did this entire Civil War was due to him failing an Government exam which was created by Confucius.
@@alexting827 His descendants still lived on, so yeah, OP is technically correct
@@justsomeguywholikesdavidbo1085 Confucius didn't invent the imperial exam
Fun fact: the song in the video, “Cup of Solid Gold,” was adopted as the Qing Dynasty’s anthem… a few days before the dynasty collapsed. It was never performed in public.
Ironically, the song expresses hope for peace and stability.
I bet if they had played it the regime wouldn't have collapsed, considering how much of a banger it is
Nope, that’s totally untrue. What you said about the anthem is true, but this isn’t that song. It just happened to be included as an extended orchestral section in the most-viewed video of the anthem on UA-cam, but it has nothing to do with the actual anthem which was way shorter.
eunuch has his dong cut, and later the empire collapses
@@gmgunnhildr2711 Huh, you learn something new every day. Does the extended piece have a different name?
@@timesnewlogan2032 it's part of an orchestra in taiwan that performed cup of solid gold along with several other traditional chinese songs. in that video, the actual anthem only goes up to 1:20 i think
0:28
British Empire: "You know we had to make an appearance in this."
“I didn’t write this.”
- Sun Tzu: The Art of War
Chinese History's a helluva drug
They like those opium that the British were giving them.
Is this a shuumatsu Valkyrie reference
True, but not as strong as whatever Hong Xiuquan was having.
Ofc they were high on British opium the century of humiliation is basically a acid trip
@@FELONIOUSBOLUSS he high on Christian propaganda
As a Chinese, I can confirm, that this Hong Xiu Quan（洪秀全）is mad
Btw fun fact of Mr Hong: Hong was a great nerd but then he failed so many times during exam (4 times) that he got mad and decided to be a Christian and start a rebellion because he thought the exam system was rubbish. And for a whole fucking rebellion.
True story.
Hitler failing art School,and this Guy failing his Exam 4th times,what a coincidence
@@idsfxtm5759 oh lol
school shooter+
I'm picturing the small to giant domino with "Guy fails an exam" and ending with "30-100 million people dead" at the start and end point.
@@JackgarPrime hahaha
I hope OverSimplified will cover this one day because it's utterly wild
Jack Rackam already did.
How to make a conflict have a ridiculous amount of casualties 101
Step 1: Take place in Asia
“Never start a land war in Asia”
@@jacobb5484 or gamble with a Sicilian when death is on the line
Step 2: Have a tonne of soldiers that are super loyal to you
@@edryctan672 Step 3: commit civil war
@@giaphudoan1768 Step 4: Profit
Ah, so Jesus had both a japanese and a chinese brother
Which is the japanese one?
@@headlander7119 Look up Tomb of Christ Japan, basically, Jesus japanese brother Isikuri died for him on the cross and then the real Jesus died on japan, so there's a tomb dedicated to him and his brother there.
This reminds me of that Lupin III where Jesus' sister lived in Japan and was a vampire.
And was actually Black and born in the Congo.
Look maybe god was getting around who knows
Ah, the adventures of Chinese Jesus. A classic for sure
Damn Chinese Jesus be taking the spot light any time soon
He died for our special fried rice
@The one and only And Knuckles
Chinese Jesus’s Bizzare Adventures
American civil war: 620,00 people died. It was the deadliest war in American history.
Chinese civil war: 20 million people died. Just another Tuesday.
The placement of comma in 62000 is physically fuking with my eyes
@@Yash-wm1nj Not as much as your comment is
ApocalypseS is literally another regular day in history for us
Citizens is the wrong word, China only had concepts of "citizens" during the early Shang and Zhou eras where people who lived in walled cities were considered a different social class from those who did not, similar to ancient Greece. During the Qing it should be "subjects".
wut
@@alexting827 "Citizenship" implies certain rights, in older eras (especially in monarchies) the term subject is more accurate than citizen.
"citizens" can just mean people that live in cities
@@gokbay3057 Op talked about "citizen", not "citizenship"
@@ixamisus ... "Citizenship" is just the status of being a citizen...
My favorite one is:
"casualties: 30,000 civilians, eaten"
*decisive Tang victory*
DECISIVE TANG VICTORY
I still don't understand how China got tons of civil wars since the dawn of it's history, with casuallities of millions and millions each civil war, and still it's population keeps growing and growing.
deaths = less mouth to feed
Well you see, fertile land for a very fertile crop (rice) combined with river highways that allow for rapid movement of agricultural products combined with one of the largest literate populations in the world (due to the aforementioned civil servant exams) in conjunction with one of the most efficient centralized administrations in the world (for the time period), generally results in rather large populations.
Less people to feed. But what blows my mind is Russia has a similar history but for most of the year they can't grow shit due to the frozen ground and yet still can pull millions out of thin air
They actually have a demographic crisis now ironically. The Chinese government is struggling to get people to have kids. Extra ironic was how massive wars with millions dead can't depopulate the country but the one-child policy (and other factors) can.
@@danshakuimo Couple this with a changing family culture by the Zoomer-generation Chinese who now prefer job security over family, and not even the one-child policy alone could depopulate East Asia in a few decades' time (note: this trend is also seen in young Japanese and Koreans, hence my use of "East Asia" instead of just China).
I remember having to learn this in middle school Chinese history class. I hated this part so much because I failed, didn't even realise it has so much meme potential.
"hated this part so much because i failed", well that’s sounds concerning
@@tsarbombawithinternetconne875 as long as OP doesn't become Christian we're good
Whatever you do, make sure to avoid christian missionaries
Actually wait, read the bible, I want something cool to happen within my lifetime
Come and get us some more memes. We could use a western hand.
I did a presentation on this rebellion, I got like a 70 because I couldn't stop laughing.
gg
@@Cooltaha gg=days????
@@darkinvader9862 what
@@Cooltaha youtube translated gg to "days"
@@darkinvader9862 well all I said was gg which means good game
China is underrated, this, the Boxer Rebellion, the Warlord Era and the Civil war.
And this is just, like, one century. They have 30 centuries worth of stuff like this
And World War II
Imagine going through all this shit in just a century. No wonder Chinese governments are always so authoritarian lmao
@@NIDELLANEUM The older stuff is amazing. Like the guy who I forget name of but was famous for being strong. So fought a enemy army by grabbing two of enemy and wielding them like weapons. I think it was his final battle but not sure. I doubt it's even a exaggeration that the guy could wield other humans as weapons since super strength is just a rare genetic condition. We even have a a tleast one living example in Dennis Rogers, dude would be a legend if was born before the gun.
@@LautaroArgentino they just gave up dealing with the people's shit
There's over 8000 movies about WWII, and yet, not even ONE about this batshit crazy war.
Somebody make this shit into a movie/series pronto!
Probably exists as some obscure Chinese drama series
There is The Warlords (2007).
I'm sure there are plenty of Chinese dramas and movies about it, they've just never reached Western audiences.
How do you even begin to breakdown a plot regarding British drug cartels, the second coming of Jesus, and the bloodiest civil war in history resulting in… literally no change besides being a little bit weaker.
@@XXXTENTAClON227 just because nothing bad happened just after all that doesnt mean they were strong, just means they were there...
So long story short:
Guy failed an exam.
A couple millions dead.
I feel somehow I see this before.
*After
The patterns
Massive Austrian Painter vibes.
Does an Austrian Painter getting rejected from art school ring any bells?
宗教只是农民奋斗和寻找革命理由的借口，
Not even joking, this partly explains the position of the Chinese government towards Christianity. Marxism didn't help matters either
Eh. Not sure if it'd be called Christianity since it straight up goes against the gospel, but I still see your point.
LOL it's less about Christianity and more about how he claimed the mandate of Heaven which is treason
It is a mandate from hell not heaven, don’t forget that
Marxism essentially "slit the wound" regarding Christianity and China
It's a Christian cult
Chinese civil war starter pack:
-Wait for natural disasters to happen
-Fail the imperial examinations system
-Claim to be related to someone important born centuries ago
-Found a revolutionary religious movement
+Crop failures.
It just works perfectly
-Vietnamese people declare independence
@@gengarzilla1685北越南在中国历史上都不够格。他都比不上辽，金，西夏。唯一被提到的就是汉朝时候的趾，和后面的安南（北越南改名），中国历史围绕中原地区的争霸展开
" The difference between fiction and reality is that fiction has to be believable."
Wtf is it with failed entrance exams leading to mass carnage?
"Rip the system."
Probably He so depressed he started thinking that he was a brother of Jesus
It already happened 2 times and reason was failed exam both times💀💀
@@ramtwo-marro1463The Huang Chao(黄巢) rebellion happend in 9th century AD was also due to similar reasons, and it killed tens of millions of people and almost ended China's second prosperous age, the Tang Dynasty.
@@ramtwo-marro1463And another similar thing happened in the next Song Dynasty. Zhang Yuan(张元), a failed scholar, rebelled and joined Xixia and helped Xixia defeat Song's army.
Chinese "minor conflicts" be like:
Cause: Dispute over who owns the corner of a house
Casualties: 800 million
Length of conflict: 120 years
Decisive Imperial Victory!
the very next week: this dynasty was overthrown by the roommate of the second cousin of the son of the emperor's least favorite concubine
*800 million dead, 12 million people cannibalized, 71000 children sexually assaulted
because China has long-time been one if thr richest and most populated region in the World,
when you get China, you get 1/4 of fortune of the World,
This wasn't a minor conflict
Result: they moved a street sign 3 inches over
I learned about this in history class, China was a crazy place
wait till you learn about all the other sh*t that happened hahahahahahahaha
Wait til you learn about the wood stoves
Bruh Eastern Europe might be crazy but Chinese wars are by far the most bat shit insane thing
yo china still is a crazy place, they just learn to hide the crazy stuff ;)
It still is
Chinese Wars be like:
"Self declared brother of Jesus Christ"
"20,000-30,000 civilians were eaten"
"Total dead: 50 million"
(emperor drinks mercury to be immortal)
"Generals are forming coalitions"
@@tatotaytoman5934 *When every district leader in China grabs an army together and declares himself Emperor
The Han Emperor in Xuchang:
It's like a Crusader Kings run in real life
Result: Inconclusive
Chinese civil wars be like:
Casus belli: Minor political misunderstanding
Result: Decisive victory
Casualties: 30,000,000,000
Territorial changes: None
Casualties: 20,000-30,000 people eaten
Result: Decisive Tang Strategic Victory
Ming in 15th century only had 18 of China's 31 provinces today. How do you imagine all those changes happened?
@@wenyichen5515well the Wing were brutally hardcore
My 7th generational grandfather was a general in Hong Xiuquan's army, we have his records kept at my family's temple in Huế. Apparently, he was actually an illegitimate son of Hong himself.
Dang, you have some interesting ancestry. As a Chinese man myself, I don't know of any interesting ancestors I may have.
@@The-Opium-Den Aw thank you, also i'm sure you have plenty of interesting family ancestors as a Chinese.
@@epradario8918 bro you might technically be a descendant of GOD if hong is right
How could him (or his descendants) end up in Vietnam? I am curious about that
@@vaninhhuu3215 The story I have been told is that my 7th generational grandfather was sent to Vietnam by his father, most likely to purchase guns from the Nguyen Dynasty. However, he just decided to stay in Vietnam and not return back to his father. My guess is that he likely saw that his father was a mad man and didn't want to be apart of his losing war. He married with the locals and boom, that's how me, a Vietnamese has Hong as my direct ancestor.
MasterofRoflness just continues to show us how underappreciated Chinese history is.
The best part is: We write everything down as an official “you have to do it” thing. Every dynasty must claim their legitimacy by “inheriting” the legacy of the former, and by recounting their predecessors fate, they solidify the reason why the mandate of heaven has chosen them to rule China (Some narrative fuckery is to be expected, but that tends to be near the end when the civil war happens). China has produced and retained the most comprehensive collection of orthodox historic records covering the time span of 3000 years, collectively known as 二十四史“Twenty-Four Histories”, amazing feat given how bloody and destructive the civil wars tend to be (and indeed the more tumultuous times like the post-Han and post-Tang years tend to be a bit hazy). Some of the finest literature in Chinese language were created among them.
@@TheLivetuner Chinese history Record writers must have been a decent job back then
@@comradekenobi6908 Indeed they were, there was a whole chamber of scholars in the imperial court dedicated to that, called 史官/太史. The position has existed since the first mythical Chinese dynasty; it's an enduring and noble tradition. They are tasked with combing through all records of the previous dynasty and compiling the orthodox history (正史). They also have personnel who record every notable event in the imperial court (起居注) and, of course, around the nation. Ever so diligent, every hour of every day, too bad the daily records before the Qing dynasty (pre 17th century) are mostly lost. Only sporadic chapters remain, like the sole survivor of the Tang daily records of 357 days between 617 AD and 618 AD (大唐創業起居注). It's pretty understandable since they are deemed trivial and serve as crude material to be edited in orthodox history.
@@TheLivetuner why so many of the records are lost though?
@@comradekenobi6908 No printing technology and its nature as an imperial tradition mean its distribution copy number was small. The material they were written on was fragile and didn't tend to survive fires, which happens a lot during turmoil. Not to mention intentional sabotage by invaders who don't care about history or fear their effect. Ancient recorded knowledge being lost to history was not rare, it was the norm; the burning of the Library of Alexandria comes to mind, and the loss of the House of Wisdom in Baghdad. The entire tradition of Classic Greek and Roman knowledge was lost in Europe during the middle ages, were it not for the Arabic people to the East who recorded them, they would've been lost forever too. Like I've said before, having a relatively continuous collection still surviving today is nothing short of miraculous already.
“When the Qing Dynasty denies you a job as a scholar, start a bloody rebellion against the government” - Ji Shu Christ, The Bible of War
More like Ji Shu Xe Re Zu
Damn ! I couldn’t breathe for 17 seconds after reading your comments! This sold me!!!🤣😭😭
Oo good lord 🙏👲
When an Austrian art school rejects you...
You’ve overestimated my ability to read text appearing on screen
Chinese history is better than GoT ever was. I could read Wikipedia articles about it for years.
Nah it's way too brutal and insane. Too unrealistic.
@@sarrumac but it is real
@@sarrumac Real life often is exactly just like that! Even George RR Martin will tell you the same thing.... 🤣🤣🤣
维基百科并不准确，你应该去读二十四史，虽然大部分中国人都不看。
The Qing army was actually kind of good in this though, a lot of their generals adopted some modern tactics and won major victories near the end, but then the incompetent imperial court hindered any actual progress in a modernized army later during the first sino Japanese war.
Qing imperial court just never been good out of honesty, same old incompetent all over again beside around Kangxi era
An advisor told the Emperor to not modernize or upkeep the army because believing it useless, and instead focusing on funding to relief natural disaster just before the outbreak of First Sino Japanese war
That's not really fair to Qing. Wikipedia Self-Strengthening Movement, Beiyang army, Beiyang fleet. They did make a serious effort to modernise militarily during much of the 19th century. The reasons for their failure aren't as simple as lack of trying.
the Qing when they have like 10 panzer 1's as their armoured force to defend against a combined arms invasion
@@tatotaytoman5934 it was republic of china, and they dont have big budget nor the industry to produce large decent army to defend against japan
90 million dead
200 million injured
led to: extreme famine, collapse of advanced agriculture, tartar invasion of the lao gan ma province, total societal anarchy for 3000 year
outcome: complete 大乳房 dynasty victory
@James T. big breast dynasty victory?
You should change it to 大奶子, which translates the joke better.
Most based civil war.
Jesus: born in the year 0
Hong, 1837 years later: I am the *younger* brother of Jesus
Funny thing Year 0 doesn’t exist.
Gregorian/Roman calendars started at 1 ad since 0 hasn’t been created by the Indians yet.
@@TitanJonkler Finally someone mention it.
The thing that really amazes me with Chinese history is how this country can utterly destroy itself to then reborn as the most powerful country on earth one or two centuries later like nothing happened.
That nation is based
So many people with a unique culture that’s benefits everyone when they work together. Different from the European/American culture, which works best when people have independence.
They are not nor have they ever been the most powerful country on Earth
@@chinesemassproduction yes they have been, and they may be again in the future
@@123MoMama so are most of the people in this comment section, so its even.
They actually came within 40 miles of the Capital at one point during the Rebellion. Think about it 40 miles made the difference between us and having products that said “Made in the Heavenly Kingdom” on it
I'm not sure his empire would have lasted but same point stands: today there might've been a completely different state or set of countries...
Nah if i remember correctly they banned having sex entirely so i doubt they would last.
@@minhtu7008 absolute mad lad
And "Christianity with Chinese Characteristics"...
To add, it was because a general leaving from the capital had decided to turn around and go back to fight last minute that the Heavenly Kingdom forces had been stopped at all.
Talk about a close call
There’s also the fact that immediately after the war ended, the Qing dynasty mobilised death squads to execute any and all Hakka people. 1,000,000 people were killed in the Guangdong providence with up to 30,000 murders a day and the raising and destruction of hundreds of villages
Ah, this is why my ancestors fled to SEA
Yes, the reason why this guy rebelled was because he was a Hakkan and he couldn't get into government jobs.
ok now who is going to write the transmigration novel where our mc reincarnates into hong xiuquan and has to successfully become the self declared brother of jesus
Bruh 😭😭 I'm a hundred percent sure that they gonna add some type of system administrator that helps them becoming the brother of jesus
I love how the «Cup of Solid Gold» plays on the background.
Fun fact: This song became the official anthem of the Qing dynasty on 4 October 1911 and got de facto relinquished just 6 days later. And the song also has never been performed on public.
this version is also, in fact, not the real version of Cup of Solid Gold, which's original version is actually less than a minute long. This version i think was made for some Taiwanese opera but dont take my word for it. still real version in my heart
@@neileung Heh, that's interesting. I've just found a version which seems to be the anthem you described.
The song used in this video is better.
@@thefishermenislandstimes4924 agreed, this will always be the original version in my heart
Meanwhile European history be like:
War of glockenschieble succession between Franz xavier von conratzgson the 8th and Wiltgelm von maxime
Casualties: 20 and a half from combat, 3 million from disease, pogroms in glockenscheible for the 6th time this week
🤣
Yeah diseases were far more dangerous than guns it can look stupid. An enfection from a little cut were enough to kill you.
Oh and Glockenschieble is a tax haven with a population of 20 and the size of a football field
How the fuck do you have half a casualty
@@hihi-rc8bl Paralyzed body or sth
J O H N N Y J O E S T A R
Games:
History nerds: SO UNREALISTIC
Real life:
History nerds: ...
"Dude you can't just eat everyone you disagree with"
-Sun Tzu
I remember reading the whole Wikipedia article on this and I can still remember more than half the snippets shown without having to pause the video every now and then to read it. Man, what a civil war that was.
Historic China is real life Warhammer 40K but without sci-fi
@crassgop Ohhhhhh
@@RoseKingSiegfried They were even thinking all that sci fi shit was powered by child sacrifices and shit too lol. Like when orphanages were being built, they were thinking the Europeans were taking all these kids for hellish machinery.
@@TheNEOverse So Western technology was basically like Chaos as far as they were concerned?
@@jgraaay18 Yep, straight up. Rail ways were fucking up the Feng Shui and Telephone poles were upsetting the chi and shit.
Funny enough, Boxers were fucking these things up and making western efforts very hard for those stupid reasons.
@@TheNEOverse what lack of Jesus does to a mofo
And the guy only went off the deep end because he failed the Imperial Exam to become an administrator several times.
well hitler failed to become a painter, and Stalin failed to become a priest.. so I guess there is a pattern
@@MrJumpingson man, if I fail UPSC 2-3 times..... I think thats it. I am going to the history books of India or maybe the world.
Thats some wild shit baby!!
Yesterday's failures are tomorrow's brutal dictators.
Chinese civil wars:
War reason: guy gets a little annoyed at someone else
Deaths: 100 Billion
He is starting a religious uprising? Who does he think he is, Jesus Christ?
Advisor- Not....exactly
TFW you fail your exams one too many times
I mean he was having a mental breakdown so I guess
He had either gone completely mad or just say fuck it lets start a civil war
@@johnlop7763 I'm not sure what drugs you (as an asian person) would need to claim yourself to be the brother of jesus in the Q I N G dynasty (note: that is almost 2000 years after 0 BCE) but it must be pretty heavy drugs
@@alexting827 he must have a Very serious mental breakdown like I get that he failed 3 times but is it really necessary to proclaim yourself as Jesus Christ second brother lol
@@alexting827 and went on a killing spree
@@alexting827 Opium DUDH!
We can imagine the most bizarre and unrealistic alternative histories, but real life will overcome our imagination
I love how this is paired up with the music lmfao
As a Hakka Christian that has his ancestors coming to SEA during the 1860s, I feel like Hong Xiuquan might have a point
As a Hakka Christian and Han Chinese ethnonationalist, I concur
You both are undeniably based
Okay, I'm super into wanting context
Seattle or Southeast Asia?
@@Thecognoscenti_1 zased
Europe wished it could get to this level of unneeded religiously fueled death
Thirty Years' War has nothing on this.
'religiously fueled death' I love it
He wasn't even proclaimimg to be a devout Christian lol
He just took a title from the most famous religious figure and peasants seeing he was charismatic and done with the government anyway decided to support him
@@comradekenobi6908 the peasant probably don't buy it but Hong had way with word probably like this "How do you do fellow Hakka? Want genocide sum Manchu demon?"
And Arabia.
Can we just appreciate the fact that this event is litteraly the "please listen i am not the messiah" meme but reverse
Mao Zedong and Chiang Kai-Shek went silent after this dropped.