Pastor Dennis Pollock said that God enables us to repent by the gospel and the Holy Spirit, but... He won't do the repenting for you. So why do I feel so hopeless in repenting of my sin? I do not feel the power of the Holy Spirit and it feels like I am just using my willpower and failing to hate sin. It is almost like God saying 'You have the ability to do so, so choose to hate sin with your free will that I gave you or go to hell.' Even Calvinism does not seem as hopeless as this. At least with Calvinism, God changes your heart and you will obey and you will not be able to refuse even with your free will.
Friend, I am praying for you. I know what you feel like to some degree when you said that it is difficult for you to bring yourself to repentance; almost hopeless in that fight. I wanted to hopefully encourage you that when there is on-going habitual sin that you are seeking freedom from, especially when the heart's affections are often so twisted and perverted, you and many other Christians will experience the feelings that you described at times. Those feelings can be caused by many things but most commonly finds its root in a misunderstanding or misguided expectation. You will never have a perfect repentance. You will never cease longing to sin as long as you live in your mortal body. You will always have evil desires present in you alongside godly ones in the new life that Christ has given you. And for every good and virtuous godly affection that God stirs up in you, you will find sin close at hand waging war against the law of grace. So what should we expect of our repentance then? A helpful illustration would be this: A husband ensnared in pornography in secret is caught by his wife. He realizes (yet at the same time always knew) how much it grieves his wife and is destroying their marriage. But the exposure of sin is the beginning that enabled the confession of it. And now, the repentance is saying to his wife, "I love you. I don't want this. I'm going to do whatever it takes to cease my relationship with this no matter how long it takes." In the same vein, repentance can be viewed as a lifestyle of constantly turning your life to embracing godly affections, which will be increasing in you more and more as you walk by the Holy Spirit in obedience. Personally, this struggle that you describe found its peace in me when I read works like, "The Mortification of Sin" and "Indwelling Sin in Believers" by John Owen. These are free on monergism's website. Some other recommendations would be, "The Joy Project" by Tony Reinke and "Spiritual Depression" by Martin Lloyd Jones. As for scriptures that helped me, I think of Micah 7:7-19 -- God will bring all His enemies in you to utter shame and ruin, and only He is able to slay them through your obedience. Sincerely praying for you friend.
I think Paul is using hyperbole to some degree when he says that he was the worst sinner. I doubt that he really thought this. After all, in the same passage he says that he received mercy because he acted in ignorance (1 Tim 1:13). But it makes sense to think that there were other Jews who opposed Jesus and the early Christians without acting in ignorance. Besides, we know that Jesus said that those who blaspheme against the Holy Spirit will never be forgiven (e.g., Matt 12:25-32). So presumably those who blasphemed against the Spirit in Paul's day were worse than him. But Paul's point in 1 Tim 1 is well taken. He was a really, really bad guy who received mercy from the Lord.
Well worth this summary of Paul's life history before starting Galatians proper. Good foresight Pastor John. Thanks.
God bless this pastor!
Thanks for the background.
Pastor Dennis Pollock said that God enables us to repent by the gospel and the Holy Spirit, but...
He won't do the repenting for you.
So why do I feel so hopeless in repenting of my sin?
I do not feel the power of the Holy Spirit and it feels like I am just using my willpower and failing to hate sin.
It is almost like God saying 'You have the ability to do so, so choose to hate sin with your free will that I gave you or go to hell.'
Even Calvinism does not seem as hopeless as this.
At least with Calvinism, God changes your heart and you will obey and you will not be able to refuse even with your free will.
Friend,
I am praying for you.
I know what you feel like to some degree when you said that it is difficult for you to bring yourself to repentance; almost hopeless in that fight. I wanted to hopefully encourage you that when there is on-going habitual sin that you are seeking freedom from, especially when the heart's affections are often so twisted and perverted, you and many other Christians will experience the feelings that you described at times. Those feelings can be caused by many things but most commonly finds its root in a misunderstanding or misguided expectation. You will never have a perfect repentance. You will never cease longing to sin as long as you live in your mortal body. You will always have evil desires present in you alongside godly ones in the new life that Christ has given you. And for every good and virtuous godly affection that God stirs up in you, you will find sin close at hand waging war against the law of grace.
So what should we expect of our repentance then?
A helpful illustration would be this:
A husband ensnared in pornography in secret is caught by his wife. He realizes (yet at the same time always knew) how much it grieves his wife and is destroying their marriage. But the exposure of sin is the beginning that enabled the confession of it. And now, the repentance is saying to his wife, "I love you. I don't want this. I'm going to do whatever it takes to cease my relationship with this no matter how long it takes."
In the same vein, repentance can be viewed as a lifestyle of constantly turning your life to embracing godly affections, which will be increasing in you more and more as you walk by the Holy Spirit in obedience.
Personally, this struggle that you describe found its peace in me when I read works like, "The Mortification of Sin" and "Indwelling Sin in Believers" by John Owen. These are free on monergism's website. Some other recommendations would be, "The Joy Project" by Tony Reinke and "Spiritual Depression" by Martin Lloyd Jones. As for scriptures that helped me, I think of Micah 7:7-19 -- God will bring all His enemies in you to utter shame and ruin, and only He is able to slay them through your obedience.
Sincerely praying for you friend.
Which app or program is using pastor John ? Great analysis !
I think Paul is using hyperbole to some degree when he says that he was the worst sinner. I doubt that he really thought this.
After all, in the same passage he says that he received mercy because he acted in ignorance (1 Tim 1:13). But it makes sense to think that there were other Jews who opposed Jesus and the early Christians without acting in ignorance.
Besides, we know that Jesus said that those who blaspheme against the Holy Spirit will never be forgiven (e.g., Matt 12:25-32). So presumably those who blasphemed against the Spirit in Paul's day were worse than him.
But Paul's point in 1 Tim 1 is well taken. He was a really, really bad guy who received mercy from the Lord.