Could you have ADHD? Let’s breakdown the signs with Tracy Otsuka | Clutterbug Podcast # 203
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- Опубліковано 27 вер 2024
- ADHD is one of the most common neurological disorders in the world, yet a staggering 75 percent of girls and women remain undiagnosed. Symptoms look different in women (it looks like anxiety, depression and issues with working memory, sleep, energy, and concentration), so many ADHD women are left to navigate a society that fails to understand their struggles and gifts.
Enter certified ADHD coach and podcast host @tracyotsuka4796 . Armed with her experience coaching thousands of women, cutting-edge medical research, and personal insights from her own diagnosis, she offers hope for women with ADHD.
Learn more about Tracy and her new book ADHD for Smart Ass Women here: www.tracyotsuk...
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My whole life I have been told "people either LOVE you, or they HATE you." So, at 42 I have no close friends, and anxiety when it comes to trying to make friends as an adult.
Me too
I had to check to make sure I didn’t leave this comment because I have been told the EXACT.SAME.THING. Sooooooooo many times. My response has always been, “Same.” (It’s my ADHD intuition, I can smell fake and bs like a shark can smell blood in the water!)
I don’t want to eat a frog. It’s the visual for me. I get the metaphor, however I then begin visualizing Kermit in a cereal bowl and want to cry, free the frogs! I have happily earned multiple Fs in many classes because no I cannot and honestly will not be cutting apart with the corpses of animals. No. Just unequivocal NOPE. First of all I like animals more than people and second just no. I was raised on a farm and I haven’t eat meat since like age 9- for obvious reasons. My uncle was very kind and understood my horror and worked very hard to be as delicate about “things” that occurred. However my gran was hard core and I never looked at her the same after the incident with the chicken.
Just starting the video and had to take a moment to appreciate the squirrel on her shelf 🤎🐿️
Thank you so much for this!!!!
I worked as a receptionist in the 1980's (and I was in my early 20's) and had to take messages and write down people's names and phone numbers. I couldn't remember 7 digits to write it down on the "return call" slip. I had to have them give me the numbers 2 digits at a time. Talk about poor working memory! lol! People thought that I was an idiot, but it was just a bad job for me! OTOH, I could organize a band concert with 500 students, 7 teachers, 1500 family members in my 50's... because I loved it!
I wish I had known this while I was teaching and I wish I could open a Special school for extraordinary ADHD kids where they could choose what to study in a big proportion. When I taught, I used to allow kids to chose the way they were evaluated: I am a very creative person and I understand that kids put a lot of effort when they like what they do. So I would offer different ways of evaluation on a topic in science, my subject: making a game, doing a class, making a 3D model, making a song, a video, a puppet show, whatever the kids would like. It was a bit unconventional but the kids liked it and more important, learned for more than cramming for a test.
Wish I had had you for a teacher!
I am so pleased you dud that fir kids. Ten gold stars to you, as so many teachers cannot see how a different approach would help those kids that don't fit ❤
I listen to you talking about your experience and I relive what I went through with my adenomyosis diagnosis: the dismissal was huge ("hey it's normal you literally cannot walk for 2 days every month from the pain, unless you take enough painkillers to drop a horse. Stop bothering us").
And it's the same for endometriosis. For autism. For fibromyalgia. Women are dismissed, ignored, ridiculed all the time and it's so frustrating.
PREACH! Thank god for the internet. I ended up doing a differential diagnosis on mySELF plus a master's degree worth of research to find answers and treatment because so many doctors blew me off. Turns out women with one of my conditions (hEDS) wait over eight YEARS longer on average than males for a correct diagnosis! : - ( A doctor even *falsified* my test results(!!!) (which thankfully his manager later verified were still in the blood pressure machine) *after* I told him an abnormal result would help me get help through an outside referral a panel of his colleagues had *already approved.* He referred me to a psychologist instead! > : - (
Bias is real and damaging and it needs to change!
@@LovesChild316 So glad you found things that helped! Good for you for being persistent! 👏👏👏
I’m in the same boat at 40 years old, 5 pregnancies later. All it took one one doctor who believed me and understood the symptoms. 5 minute phone call.
@@bellaluce7088My sister dropped 30 pounds in a month and her provider pretty much shrugged and said "Meh. Anxiety." Turns out she had Median Arcuate (sp?) Ligament Syndrome, MALS, in addition to POTS and EDS.
I got "lucky" in that a follow up ultrasound revealed a suspected large functional cyst to be in fact a large endometrioma-- just diagnosed this week. Yay?
I am so glad that you write this comment! It is so frustrating and disheartening when one is dismissed because the doctor, and/or because the general public does not understand. I wish people would believe people’s struggles and be curious about it rather than dismissing or casting negative judgement. They cannot realize the additional harm they are causing.
Thank you for bringing attention to this! Diagnosed @37. Was told by female psychologist, after taking neuropsych test and checking off almost every ADHD symptom, "You have four young kids and a high IQ, so I think you have really high expectations for yourself. It's probably anxiety." 🤯 Thankfully, my GP knew to put me on Ritalin. Was like putting on a pair of glasses for the first time. Now I don't lock myself out, lose my keys, my phone or other really important things, get myself to places on time and can keep my house relatively under control.
Cas, I just wanted to say that it makes me so sad to hear people have called you annoying and "too much" your whole life. (I don't want you to stop talking about your experiences! That's not what I'm saying) I'm saying I feel such empathy for you that even as a small child you had such hurtful things said to you. Find your people. A lot of my friends have ADHD and we just found each other naturally (before half of us even knew we had ADHD). We understand our weird minds. Please don't smother your light. Just be you, Cas, and the right people will come to you naturally as well ❤❤❤
I almost cried when you said that that "doc" said you were too successful to have ADHD. I work my butt off every second of every day to just keep my head above water. And to the outside it looks like I'm totally fine, when in actuality, I'm drowning.
Yep 😢😊
It astounds me the horrid remarks doctors say in relation to mental health.
The drowning. 💯
Have you heard of the Holderness Family? They have a book coming out called “ADHD Is Awesome” it’s about thriving while having adhd. Penn Holderness has been diagnosed with adhd for quite awhile and he talks a lot about the stigma around it and how he uses adhd as a tool for success rather than a hindrance. They talk a lot about it on their podcast and it has come up in some of the comedy videos they post as well. 😊
This has been me all my life. It’s so sad. I went through thinking I was stupid. I did awful in my school work. But my parents knew I didn’t have a learning disability. But I was tested for it. I was called too hyper, fidgety, anxious, too sassy, too bossy and my teachers said I was too sassy. I was always in trouble for talking and never did my home work! This podcast is MY LIFE! It’s sad. But I guess it’s good to know that there was a reason for it. No one knew how to help me. I have a story and am learning so much now in my 40s. But unfortunately my parents and more importantly my dad are no longer with me. So I cannot call him to tell him. I can finally explain it because I know he tried so hard to help me. But this is all so informative. I feel like it’s gotten worse as I’ve gotten older.
Keep being "EXTRA", Cas! We love who you are!
I just adore you Cass. It breaks my heart that you were told that you were annoying and made to feel that you are weird. Of course I am totally adhd myself.
Breaks my heart too. My daughter is hyperactive and yeah it’s a lot. I’m sad for this narrative that she is already encountering. But I am heartened by the fact that as imperfect as I am, she still considers me her safe person. 💖 I wish everyone who experiences this has a safe person. It’s hard. And then to be so sensitive (rsd).
I love how they are showing the issues right on the podcast!
Hahahaha I can completely relate to the "what was I just saying?". But for real, the working memory issues are so real for me. Thank you for sharing your experiences.
It's kind of a mean joke to literally have a squirrel in the background distracting ADHD folks coming here to watch this podcast 😅
😂
Never be less Cas! I love the person you are!!! ❤❤❤❤❤
Yes to this one million times! You rock AS-IS, Cas!!!!! 🤩
I love Tracy and listen to her podcast regularly. I had asked about it at my provider and then ran across her podcast and there was an episode where she describes what adhd looks like in women. No wonder my physicians missed it. Thank you, Cas, for always advocating for us adhd'ers. Two of my favorite ladies in one episode
Just a thought… Maybe we’re normal? And It’s boring or annoyed people that might need meds??? 🤣
I have cried out to the Lord….”I’m a B- in a TYPE A WORLD!” Love hearing from you Cass, Love Barb D ❤
Wow. I just signed up for Cas’ Clutterbug Course and then I listened to this… I relate! No wonder I haven’t been able to keep the fort at home. Driven is a form of hyper-activity. Wow! Feeling like I could be so much more. I’m there!!!
Very educational and impactful info. 🙏
I’ve been so tired about hearing about ADHD and was resistant to this (I’ve hacked myself to death this past year), but I needed a body double that wouldn’t distract my cleaning. I laughed out loud so many times and felt so validated listening to this. I’m almost done with a masters in special education and have done so much with my inattentive ADHD. But I still feel like I’m failing others and myself. Thank you for the reminder that this is a symptom. I can’t wait to learn more from Tracy. Also Cass thank you for your guidance on body doubling, and on your “make it pretty” brain breaks. In one day I emptied and reorganized my spare bedroom/office, and most of the extra is already in the basement instead of the living room!
I was officially diagnosed with ADHD at 29. An entire lifetime of being told "you have anxiety and depression" plus having had tried 5+ antidepressants, nothing ever seemed to help. I am a physician assistant working in orthopedic surgery and I LOVE my work. I feel my ADHD has helped greatly in my ability to be a good provider, in that I focus extremely well when I see my 20 patients a day, but when I sit down to do the documentation? It is like pulling teeth to complete. Last year, after hitting one of the lowest parts of my life, I finally started ADHD meds and it has been life changing. I had never been so calm in my life. The quiet in my brain was almost overwhelming because I had never experience this. I cried that first day just from the surprise of how I felt. For me, the struggle with school never started until I started my master's program and I would have to have headphones and staring into the wall to do tests. I still to this day never "relax". I am always doing something and feel guilty when I am not doing my list of tasks I think I should be doing. Also, the weird sensitivities to clothes, touch, texture. Thank you for this podcast!!!
I haven't been diagnosed but I diagnosed myself (LOL) and mine didn't start til after I received my bachelors. I would have never gotten that degree with ADHD. So glad it waited! I def know it's related to hormones. I can't sit still and like you I feel like I always need to be doing something. I used to be an avid reader. Once I hit about 25 years old, it was a struggle to get into any books. 😮
@@dianasimplifiesif you didn't have ADHD as a child, you don't have ADHD as an adult. You could have something else.
@@lauralaforge558 that's actually not true. Hormonal changes can set it off. I could have had it but it wasn't showing up as a child as hyperactive.
@@dianasimplifies it's in the diagnostic criteria. you are kind of changing your story though. My ADHD wasn't diagnosed because I did well in school and maybe bc I am female. But looking back, it's so clearly evident.
@@lauralaforge558 all I know is Cas had a show on a few months ago that resonated with me and the lightbulb went on. I don't think anyone could convince me I don't have it at this point but you can obviously think whatever you want about the situation. It also runs in my family which I understand is a big thing. I've only started listening and studying up on it within the last year so I don't know all the "rules" and the correct things to say or not say. Anyway it doesn't matter. I have no interest in taking meds at this point. I've learned hacks along the way to deal with all the issues it was causing me. Have a great day.
That frog thing! Everyone tells you to eat the frog. But the dopamine building activities make so much more sense for me!
Cass, look and see if you can get your daughter a neuropsychological evaluation done by a neuropsychologist. They will be able to properly diagnose your daughter. O had one done for my daughter and found out that not only did she have ADHD, but she also had two learning differences/disabilities. The neuropsych evaluations take several hours, but I think they are so helpful because they test for so many things.
Thank you, Cass, again. Yes, friends are attracted at first, then they drop away, or I do. Relationships are so hard to maintain!
Cass! Turn on music and dance around the house while you get dressed and get ready for the day!! Or maybe yoga or tai chi?
A few months ago I started suspecting I have ADHD and I shared that with a coworker. I told him I checked a list of symptoms and I had 90% of them. A few days later I saw him again and he goes: I told my wife you think you have ADHD and she said you don't. His wife is a baker and has no medical training whatsoever and I've never met her in my life 😂😂😂
I was diagnosed 2 years ago. I have the combo type. I was always very hyper, loved talking (and fast), was told I had a reading disability, couldn’t focus on boring things. Now it all makes sense! Btw, my desk was in the hall as well! LOL
Brilliant, stopped the podcast to do an online test after meaning to do it for a couple of years. Lots of aha moments too. Interestingly I recorded my own podcast, after a year of procrastinating and beating myself up, the other day and said exactly what she said about potential and feeling like I’ve not come close to it. Not sure where I heard the idea but the way I got to starting and hitting record is I wrote down a question with my right hand (dominant) and replied writing in my left . Was almost child like in the answer and just said, too many steps and too complicated to start. So I made a super simple plan. Going to do the same now with exercise cause I’ve been talking (thinking ) myself out of that too. Wondering if music maybe be a part of the answer, hmmmmmmmmmm …… off to overthink things …… thanks both of you for the podcast. And yes, preordered the book.
This is such an eye opening video. Thank you! I am not diagnosed but was told unless I wanted medication I didn’t need testing. I tried lemon balm one day. I made 2 pints of lemon balm tea and after drinking the second one my mind was calm. I WAS SO SCARED! I didn’t know what it felt to not have a noise constant going brain. Give it a try. Might work for some?
I love this ADHD section starting at around 24:10!!! Her brain was going so fast and the thoughts/words kept leaving. I feel so validated!!!
Hahah love it! I listen to tracey all the time, its awesome to see her in video! And you both together? Awesome! Nicely done lovelies.
My son is that student sitting in the back of the classroom. He is sitting and quiet. But just can’t focus and remember. He struggles big time😢
❤❤❤ Great interview! And it is so nice to know I have peeps.
Yep we are a tribe!
The pattern of compounding dopamine until 2pm when there is a big boost of dopamine.
This is the pattern of my whole life. The 2pm joy and feeling normal and the daily effort to get there.
My husband has ADHD and our seven children all have ADHD and/or autism and let me tell you, it is an interesting life... They are for sure not the same and each are working on figuring out how to handle life. My husband has the hardest time, probably because of growing up in caos with a mother with ADHD and his father leaving when he was an infant. My youngest had exactly the same experience as Tracy's son with medication, it has tought him how to be and what to do and now he doesn't use it anymore. I'm probably the one knowing most about ADHD in our family because of wanting to understand all these people! 😅
Thank you both for this conversation. I have recently learned that I have ADHD when my 8 year old daughter was diagnosed. I'm still in the process of thinking about whether I need an official diagnosis for myself.
Fantastic interview! Are you going on her podcast too? I would love that!!!! Her listeners wiuld definitely benefit from your tips and organizing styles. A lot of organizers arent made for ADHD folks.
I love this woman’s hair and her overall style!❤
I've been drug addiction since 14, and I'm 37 now, but I've always been able to deal with everyday life, and without IT, I couldn't get out of my head. I don't use it now, but I've been living my dream life. But having the hardest time with doing a little bit of everything until about a month ago when I find your youtub Channel and it taught me a lot thank you so much I would love to get to know you guys and figure out more things about this😢😊❤
I wish I was told about this when I was younger. My life could have been better..😢
That breaks my ❤ for you Cass! You are amazzzzzing! As a fellow ADHDer I love being around others with ADHD! We are fun, quirky, interesting and funny!
WOW! Such an eye-opening interview! I see myself and my sons differently now, possibly even my Mom. Much to learn... Thank you for taking the time to talk about this condition, which clearly affects more of us than I realized! I also use many tools to keep me on top of things because I just won't remember, no matter how important it is! A lot to digest here!
This is just wow! I am so informed and thankful for this conversation.
I've learned a lot from this podcast. I'm on sertralen it helps but not very much. I'm trying to find a way to drive again. Dr said I'm anxious and some depression. I do try to exercise but I'm not good at it to do every day.
I love this episode so much! I was diagnosed with adhd at 38 and it explains a lot! I struggled in school until high school when I could chose music as a major then I was suddenly a genius 😂 I also have this thing that women either love me of hate me, idk why but maybe some ca’nt handle the ”too much” thing about me. I now work at a adhd clinic and I totally found the right place for me. The patients love that I can relate to them, especially the mothers since I am a single mom of four and still manage to keep them all alive and keep a job. Is it easy to organise all my kids stuff? No but I have worked out a way to make it work and I share that with our patients and they love it! I also think my youngest son has adhd. He struggles in school and feels like he is dumb, but he can read and study about whatever he is interested in at the time and he is brilliant! He is so smart, he is just not made for the square school system we have. ❤ Sending lots of love to all adhd women and children out there ♥️♥️♥️🌸
Hey Cass. This is the story of my life and I know that daily exercise is the key to my happiness. Once, I was at a proper weight for about a year and it felt great and I've been struggling every single day to get back into that routine. It's been over 20 years. For a while now I've been wondering how to incorporate everything I have learned about hoarding, minimalism, organisation etc. into having a healthy lifestyle, not just in decluttering my home but also my brain from putting off healthy eating and exercise. Tracey today has sparked a little lightbulb in the 25 min @ 70% heart rate idea but I feel that somehow Decluttering, Minimalism, Organisation, ADHD and Healthy Living/Weight Control are all one package that i need to sort out before I'll ever be able to commit to daily exercise to help with my ADHD, home and family.
“Driven”! Absolutely!! Wow! My studying routine was totally that! Also, I will be doing something productive towards a goal but think at the same time why am I not doing more? This is priceless! Thank you SO MUCH Tracy and Cass!! Merry Christmas! 🎄🎄🤶🤶
Funny thing is…now I’m madly in love and married to a total introvert. 😂
Just wow! I’m definitely sharing this with one of my friends I grew up with. And let her know that this is us! Thank you for bringing hope to my life and will be looking into wholistic care first and then man made medicine last. I won an award in math class for being the head in the clouds . 😶🌫️ lol
😥 I ve been dealing with this my entire life. I’m just knowing why 😢 this is so sad that we don’t really know our struggles
Amazing episode! Cass, you’re an amazing listener!!
I've just met my soul mates!!!thanks to you Cas,I found out that I've got adhd and I have been feeling so happy that I finally know whats going on with me.excelleng at school but easily bored of daily routines or same behavior of people.keep working we are so many!
I am there with you Case on exercise. It actually makes me ill.
This podcast was right up my alley! I definitely have undiagnosed adhd, a lot of these examples I was like yes, yes and yes. My 7yo daughter has adhd and she’s on medication and does so much better with it than without. I’ve learned tips and tricks for mine but I can definitely relate with Cas, I still need my alarms, notes, reminders etc
Wow this is amazing. I listen to u all the time and I can relate to u in sooo many ways I have struggled all my life and been successful in so many ways but never had any balance..
Thank you for helping me through this journey of decluttering and balancing my life and my business.
Put a kettlebell in your kitchen. Start doing 5 minutes in the morning of strength training exercise is while you wait for your coffee. Exercise will absolutely change your life. I have ADHD I take meds They help a little,exercise helps a lot. Plus you don't want to lose all your muscle mass when you get old that's how people start falling over and declining quickly. ❤
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am not through [at 20:23] with this but had to stop a couple of times so far..@56 I am hearing what my life has been about... THANK YOU for this one BEST CHRISTMAS DAY EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!......back to listening - Just finished SO on her website and again Thank you CAS for being YOU!..Thank you both for helpng me truely SEE "MY_SELF" for hearing how you are and I remember I was that way I was the excited pumped up person who was happy and singing and dancing and and and but now I dont remember when that all changed. Today I will start to figure that out and maybe start to excersie in am too. Thank You Thank you and Happy Boxing Day, Cas!!!!
There is not a single thing I enjoy doing in the morning that could motivate me to exercise. I hate mornings. And when I do exercise in the morning, I spend the next four hours struggling to stay awake and don't regain any energy until the afternoon. Exercising after lunch is so much better. Not having to wake up until after 10 am is even better than that.
I love and appreciate this so much 💓 im constantly breaking out in song and dance 💃 randomly. I work so hard to mask it when not around loved ones. No wonder why I'm so exhausted. Love love love this so much thanks to both Cas and the guest ❤️ 💕 💙 💖 💗 ♥️ ❤️ 💕 💙 💖 💗
Please please do a 10 day exercise with me video challenge! It would so fun to go through the morning suckiness with you!
I have been diagnosed with Asperger’s but very attentive so higher level. Interest thrive in positive emotiom
People loving that you’re so exciting is a cultural thing.
I’m not very OTT but I can be blunt or talk a lot or loose my filter in excitement. In the U.K, OTT people are less favoured than in USA. So I tend to repel people and it’s made for a very lonely life now in my 50s.
On a positive note - I see my adhd as my superpower. My ability to juggle so many responsibilities & my creativity knows no bounds.
I also think that tasks that dealing with the house and the kids takes way more executive functioning then you're chosen profession. So because women are usually in charge of the home, it is just so much work every day.
This Was The Best for Us Female ADHD 💝🙋♀️💖💖❤️🩹💝💞👍👍🏽👍🏿👍🏻👍🏾👍🏽🙋🏽♀️🙋♀️
Cassie this was awesome. I've always felt my brain is A.D.H.D. and I've been told, I am the smartest under achiever. I'm gonna get her book. Thank you both
... Also , cassie , I understand how much you hate exercise period and this will sound a little woo woo to quote you . But I have learned through focusing an emotional release that I can free up the energy and get myself to love exercise. I've been doing so much clearing work and as I clear my AD HD seems to be more and more apparent. Although I call it O CD period LO. Well, I'm talk texting now. Because apparently I do 4 things at once all the time period But I just wanted you to know that as much as you used to hate house cleaning and now you love it and you're addicted to it, and it's made your life so much better, I think the exercise piece is just yet another portion of your reprogramming your brain and aligning yourself. With that better and better knew you period I just wanted you to know how much I would love to this podcast and how much I appreciate your work. It is truly helped me in many ways here. I am a healer, and yet I'm getting help and healing from a person who specializes in organizing period that's pretty awesome and very A. D. D thanks
Thank you!
Wow! She’s gonna change more lives! How about both of you!!! Are gonna change more lives !!!❤❤❤ Come on, you get through to us more than she ever could ❤
At 34:17 had to stop video to just breathe a little. Talking about not remembering the names of books, names of characters…If I don’t immediately get into a book or have to put it down for a while, I pick it up later (months) and can’t remember who’s who or even recognize the plot. Sometimes I just start the book over and it’s like I can barely remember much from the first time I read it. I can watch reruns of tv shows like house hunters and I remember enough that I know I’ve seen it before but I can’t recall which house they picked. It’s like a new show each time. Same way with crime shows like CSI. It’s a surprise to find out who did the murdering even though I’ve seen it. 😂 but also 🙄
I have so many symptoms now. It’s overwhelming 🫤
Exercise is the most potent anti-depressant and the most under-utilized.
You’re amazing, Cass! Your ADHD makes you one of the best UA-camrs and you’ve made decluttering and cleaning fun! (I’ve avoided house work until now and I’m older than you. It was all or nothing which was horrible). But exercise keeps me sane with my sedentary job. I shouldn’t say exercise. More like intensive physical play. Do something fun!! Do you like to dance badly in your house? Loud music and dance cleaning. Or the “just dance” video game (omg so fun). UA-cam videos. You don’t need a gym. Or major equipment. I roller skate in the house (wear all the pads!), do handstands (this took years but the head rush is worth it) and hike when I have time. Ooh and my standing desk w a little stepper from Amazon w music for really boring computer stuff. Anything is better than nothing!
I mean don’t do it Cass!! Don’t exercise, it’s horrible and you can’t do it!
Love you from afar.
Thank you so much!! Exercises and walking help me a lot❤❤❤
This came at the right time!!!
I am pretty sure that I have adhd or something similar.
I really struggle to get anything done before midday... I am kept awake most nights by chronic pain and other symptoms of chronic health challenges. I sleep from 4am or 6am, whenever my pain settles down, until 11am or midday then it takes at least an hour for me to wake my brain up enough to do anything. I am active from 2pm until 6pm then nap for an hour or two. Then I'm back up to cook dinner and get stuff done until 2am. Then I start to get more pain so I slowly potter around the house getting ready for my sleep...i am diagnosed with chronic fatigue syndrome, recovering from being bed bound, so I have learnt that unless I stick to the timetable I've outlined above I end up creating a flare up of all my chronic conditions because one flareup of pain/fatigue will lead to a spiral down into being bed bound very quickly.
I say all this to emphasise the point that we must adapt what we do to our individual capacity....
I went for a diagnosis, I had to have a phone call with a mental health nurse who was suppose to fill in the forms. She stated you don't have ADHD because you haven't been in prison and it'll be a waste of time filling in these lengthy forms. Not only have I scored high on 5 different adhd diagnosis things online I filled in a psychologists form for Autism and I scored 215 out of it. I think it was around 240/250. I never considered I had autism, I filled it in after my sister sent it to me. I'm 47 next month.
Just read over my comment. Whew! Gonna let it fly as is, but man, I'm a mess! And I'm going to have to send this video to myself to listen to again, several times I'm sure! I'm like Tracy..."what was I saying?" is something I say (or think) ALL the time!
All thru school my teachers told my parents that I'm smart with a high IQ, but I just don't "apply myself". I got Cs in most classes, Ds in a couple, but As and Bs in subjects I liked or had a teacher who knew how to hold a kid's attention. I was the quiet kid. I didn't have many friends, not close friends. I graduated high school but couldn't finish college. So boring that I'd skip classes. I wanted to be an interior designer so I didn't want to go to that college, but my parents didn't like the idea of me being in NYC (at FIT or Parsons) alone. Eventually I took secretarial classes and had office jobs. Yeah, boring again. I always had trouble being late. Classes, assignments, appointments, work, whatever. I had a union job and that saved my employment and led to being diagnosed with ADD when I was about 43, via being diagnosed with depression. Gee, I wonder why I was depressed! The psychiatrist tried so many meds for me, different meds, different dosages. What finally worked was a combination. Wellbutrin and something else. I can't remember what it was because I had to stop that combo. I had a seizure and it was determined that Wellbutrin caused it! Shortly after that my employer downsized and closed where I worked. Over the next 20 years I had a few part time and temporary jobs, started an embroidery business, and retired to take care of my ailing husband.
Anyway, Cas I idolize you! I am so all over the place that I have been messy, unorganized, super cluttered all my life! You have it all together, even though you said you have to set up multiple safeguards to be that way, and I SO want to have a tidy home! I have all kinds of alarms and reminders too, by the way. I signed up for your "Get your life back" (can't remember the name, of course!) but will only be able to join in for a few hrs on the 13th. Looking forward to having a home I can be proud of. I'm done with being too embarrassed to invite people into my home. It will be nice to be able to entertain and keep in touch with friends that I HAVE made. Thank you for opening up and sharing your back story, and for showing us how to get rid of clutter!💞
I haven’t finished the video but I have to comment, out of my comfort zone, but big feelings about this. Cas mentioned her daughter’s friend saying she can’t always have sleepovers etc with her because it’s exhausting. Heartbreaking as a fellow mom.
Back up though. I’m listening because I’m an intense introvert with an extrovert young daughter who I suspect may have adhd and I want to be able to be a teammate vs a tyrant with her. I need more info on how I might be able to support her while protecting what I’m finding is my own neurodiversity that I haven’t quite yet figured out. As an introvert, thinking about how your energy tends to draw me in also. Yin to my yang so to speak. I need your energy to help balance mine, but I’m an introvert. Like couldn’t order a pizza for years because it required talking to a person I don’t know on the phone. I have enough coping techniques to have been an actress once and have a social life. I love people and need friendships, but I also need periods of solitude and rest. I don’t know the specifics of your daughter’s friendship, but if I were your daughter’s friend, I would want to follow that statement up with, “but I love you!! I want you in my life, you bring so much good to my life that I’m so grateful for, so don’t leave me, but I also need low key interactions too for my own survival, so let’s plan a different kind of hang out”. I’m sure that’s not how the conversation went, I think I just wish it did in my head anyway. :)
This is so interesting - as a forest school/wilderness skills teacher of 25 years, I have found that people (adults and kids) with ADHD always gravitate towards me. We have a lot of fun together and they are the people that I love being around. They get so into things and love to invent and play and delve into things. I don’t think I have ADHD, but I love these things too. I am so full of curiosity and love to play. Atypical people tend to act old fast. Glad people’s brains are all different😊.
Those of us with the Inattentive type might not have that entrepreneurial part though, & that's tough.
Hyperactivity/Impulsivity can help with starting something, but not necessarily the foundations & follow-through.
But hyperfocus without those added traits? You hope that others recognize your gifts & that you won't feel out of place in organizations. But we've often still felt out of place most of our lives, have the same thing of trying really hard but floundering, & wonder why people have an issue with us when we are quiet/shy/fading into the background.
It can be unbelievably puzzling before diagnosis.
& when we do speak up/need something- People can be very harsh. Maybe because they get used to not hearing from us.
Maybe that's just me, I don't know. But anyway, Cassandra, I enjoy Clutterbug & your books so much. Thanks for all you do!
I appreciate what you said about your daughter & RSD. Your daughters are lucky to have a parent so aware of ADHD.
Cas, I can attest to exercise as a dopamine game changer. When you make consistency the goal and not fun or perfection, it’s easier. Just rip the 10 minute bandaid off and then give yourself permission to get or eat however you want to. I started to notice that every time I exercised in the morning, I had a good day, and every time I skipped exercise I had a harder day. 🤷🏼♀️
YES!!!! The intuition!!!!! 🎉🎉🎉🎯
😂😂 Im one of your sisters. I feel like im with my kind. I'm starting the process to get a diagnosis.
Me too! I can’t tell when I’m taking the meds, but I can tell when I’m not.
I have asked my doctor to diagnose me or test me multiple times as well as my daughter because I am 99% confident that I have it and now I'm at a loss as to where to go. Maybe a psychiatrist is the route. But I feel like women have to fight for everything even if they're certain that they know what the issue is. We have tried antidepressants and anti-anxiety medication and it does not help this issue.
A psychologist who does the testing could be helpful. My sister took her daughter to a psychologist.
I’m grateful there’s nothing seriously wrong with me.
ADHD/Borderline (me) is not a disease. I’m just build differently.
I don’t know what life would be like without it, but I love life. I wouldn’t want my life to be any different.
Yep can’t concentrate and all that. So I make lists.
Some people say it’s soooo difficult, but it’s really just a question of acceptance and to stop comparing yourself to others.
Unless you just want to draw attention and play the “I’m special”.
Nope there’s nothing special about having diagnoses.
The truely unique people are the ones without diagnoses. Now they are special.
Spectacular video!!
Making a 52 minute video for ADHD people…. Thanks a lot 😢
Cass! I will be your friend! I struggle with all of it too! (Alberta Strong!)
You are both Treasures!!❤
I feel like you would love dancing. I think just put on some sick beats and shake it Cas. Dance party your way to fun.
I hate traditional exercise, but I love Miranda Esmonde White's Classical Stretch. It's 22 minutes and your body actually feels better after instead of exhausted
Great message. I really needed to hear this today. I hope I remember to talk to my doctor about it next month.
I'm pretty sure rejection sensitive dysphoria can happen without ADHD and in other mental health issues as well; C-PTSD, anxiety, vulnerable attachment, etc.
incredible thank you so much❤
I need the follow-up on Cas' experiment with exercise! Did the reward motivation kick in? Or will that take longer and more support? Big topic!
Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! ❤❤❤
I have to correct you on saying in the UK if you're depressed, they write a prescription for exercise before a prescription for SSRIs. That's absolutely wrong, they want you popping the pills here just as much as in the states
So where do you find someone that is qualified do not misdiagnose I'm 58 and I've been diagnosed with cptsd chronic depression since I was 10 years old as well as a myriad of other issues issues depression anxiety panic attacks night terrors Sleep disorders disorders the list goes on as long as your arm and I feel like I fit this like a glove yet I find myself over and over getting told without even being evaluated even buy Decades of previous doctors and mental health
Cleaning house and dancing can both be exercise. Move your body. I enjoy walking outside.
Cass you need to find a fun group of people to exercise with ❤️
Cash’s, I’m a night owl as well. While I don’t hate exercise as much as you, I totally get your resistance. Trust me, you need a Cellerciser! Not just any rebounder, but a Cellerciser! You can get the same amount of benefits from 10 minutes as opposed to the 20 your guest mentioned. It’s been a game changer for me to jump on that for 3 minutes whenever my brain farts, which is more often than I would like. 🥴
I managed to get through undergrad through enormous effort but getting through the higher academia where you have to do all the boring paperwork and jumping hoops necessary is painful to my brain and it has stopped me from doing the Phd in the topics I wanted to study... so I do it on my own as an independent researcher (for many years because I keep getting distracted) but it doesn't give me the credentials and it doesn't help me to get ahead in the world that values credentials more than the years of practical experience and expertise I have developed by being on the ground doing the work. She makes it sound all rosy but it's actually painful and debilitating and frustrating and sad. I would have preferred to not have it although I do appreciate my creativity and breadth of interests.