This is the main reason why I got into so many toxic friendships and relationships. I never had that filter to realize when someone was envious of me because they all acted just like my family. It’s very hard growing up with people who hate you and you just can’t understand why.
@ Yes and respect for elders is deep within my culture. So I was taught to respect them even with the catty and envious ways my elders would act. That filter for envy never stood a chance.
The book lists different stages, signs, archetypes, and tactics to help people decipher. Envious people are often undetected because they are so calculated!
My dad wanted to come back into my life a few days ago I told him NO. We have a toxic relationship and I told him I wanted NOTHING else to do with him and I asked him NOT to call me anymore and blocked, deleted him number. Yes family can be so TOXIC and WICKED @ my age I'm over it.
This is so eye opening! A lot of us have dealt with this . They are the most dangerous people you’ll kinda end up meeting. They’ll sabotage you not knowing you’ll be sent to break chains from your families bloodline you’ll still thrive alone but when it’s time to help they’ll be shocked when you no longer give access
Yea when you grow up in the chaos its hard to see what's normal or not till you remove yourself and process all the toxicity and realize it was indeed abuse and knowing this will allow us to break the cycle.
I was taught to be kind, loving and forgiving to my abusers cause tbey are family. I was taught to tolerate the disrespect, humiliation, greed, selfishness, and unnecessary cruelness since birth. I was taught to feel bad for defending myself. The disfunction was forced upon me since a young age. The fact this video made me realize this hurts me deeply. But I am thankful. Thank you and god bless you
Literally my current situation. Recently found out my sister has been my biggest hater, all the while pretending to be loyal family at the same time. What a snake.
Same. All while competing with me, dating every guy that showed interest in me, getting locs after I got locs and trying to destiny swap. I caught the evil 😈 coming at me and looked and couldn’t believe it.
Relatable! Mine said she doesn't want to talk to me for a year,put me on a "timeout" after she told a family members where I lived because they coerced it out of her.
This is me right now. I’m finally coming into terms that my mom has a lot of narcissistic tendencies and she is holding me back. She wants me to stay here in Missouri to get my name out here with the whole music thing. But one of the top music schools in the country offered me 17k and there are way more opportunities out there. Everyday work wise and music career wise. I’m a pretty girl and all I have is low tier retail and fast food options for work. It’s a breeding ground for envy and mistreatment. Anyhow I will just have to settle with getting a loan to live on campus the first semester, eventually move and just pay the price if that means I can give myself a better future.
You got this babes! Proud of you 🤍 Make sure the investment is beneficial in the long run and be cautious about taking out excessive loans. Use school as a means to an end.
You are spot on! I went no contact with mom and sister they thrive off chaos not to mention the story of precious hits home too much and is very triggering. To hear someone tell you your mom said she forgave him (my abuser/bio dad) and she thinks Im bitter that she doeesnt hate him which has never been the case. I knew then her selfishness and disdain for me knows no bounds.
It’s such a heavy movie I couldn’t even reference too much of it for this analysis. God bless you baby, you have a life ahead of you that does not entail abuse. You owe it to yourself to move forward and have better 🤍🤍🤍
Same but with my dad most of the time. And in my culture which is Armenian, we are taught to be super subservient and almost worshipping towards our parents. But that’s sooo effed up.
That part. Not to mention Vivicas character tried to brush it off very casual in that scene like “hey I was walking by and he needed help and this happened sorry”. Like tf 😂😂😂😂😂.
Thank you for making this video as well as the others you’ve made like this your so right the holidays can be especially rough for those of us who are dealing with people like this in our families. In my case, the person like this in my life happens to be my own mother. I’m still trying to work on leaving hopefully sometime before my next birthday.🤞🏻✝️
I excluded FAMILY from acting as if they are an enemy as someone on the OUTSODE..blinded by "you have to be there for family" "they are still family" crap. Yea and there are exemptions to the rule.
15:27 is a word! I’ve been reflecting on the last 9 years and whew chile going no contact was best decision I made. The common denominator presented themselves as my day one and I believed it because we were family.
You know, you did your thing with this one. I just love your take and perspective! Having experienced this growing up and dealing with the envy of my stepmother and my stepsister, when I say you're spot on about the envy enablers! YOU ARE 1000% correct! They tend to fly under the radar, but are also just as much of a threat. They also may not like their position and looking to triangulate to find their way of "rising" in the family structure on the back of the target and to get that "validation" they seek. Great great video!!!!
Rewatching Soul Food as an adult i’ve come to the realization that the family treated Terri like garbage. Big mama set the tone for how the family treated Terri. They used & abused Terri. The movie made Terri look like the villain because of her standoffish demeanor. Kenny wasn’t smart enough to be with Terri anyway. Max was more of his speed. Max used her marriage to Kenny as a one up on Terri knowing that she would never be where Terri was in life. By Bird being the youngest she was probably spoiled & got away with everything. She probably was still messing around with Simuel because she didn’t set any boundaries & she went behind her husband’s back to Simuel to get him a job. Here are some fun facts: The late Whitney Houston & Halle Berry were considered for the role of Terri.
Whew, you made a great point! The elders in the family set a tone for how everyone is treating either by enabling or avoiding 🎯 Also both Whitney and Halle would have bodied this role as well!
@ After watching movies like This Christmas, Madea’s Big Happy Family & Almost Christmas i’ve come to the realization that Soul Food is the blueprint for black family movies. Every movie that came out after Soul Food mirrors it.
My parents, siblings , 1st and 2nd cousins on my father’s side. I’m strong though, and I know God has my back 1000%. God knows my heart ❤️ and he sees the evil they have been doing to me but it is okay! I’m still winning
Hi Msreadtheroom thanks for all your publications you posted this year. It highlighted me so much ! Also I decided to buy the book green eyes. Although, I'm not emotionally ready to read it yet, I believe it is one of my best purchases of 2024. Thanks again and have a lovely time with your close ones ❤
You should def cover this topic more. I think a lot of jealousy stems from my family especially my older sister. My mom enables her. Now that I’m giving birth to my daughter I’m putting up secure boundaries, not necessarily keeping them out of my life but telling them how they will act around me and what I won’t allow.
There are other types of family fueds out there. I had a boss on a job I had in the past who told me he and his cousins hated each other. I had a co-worker on another past job who told me in her boyfriends family cousins don't like each other and they have gotten into physical fights. There are even other family fueds where one entire side of a family doesn't like the other side. Even still other family fueds where an entire family doesn't like another family - but this last Family Fued is a different subject.
Now, that I’m older, in my opinion the Terry’s real enemy wasn’t the runaway cousin Faith, but her sister Maxine! Think about it, Maxine was the wild, fun and party girl! She ended up marrying her sister’s boyfriend and lived the struggle love life! Terry goes on to being the successful rich auntie everyone turned to for financial help! The party girl was stuck with a manual labor husband and home with 3 kids!!!
LOL kendall is the jealous one they both jealous ladies but kendall is extremely jealous she more manipulative n underhanded while kylie is more in your face with her b.s lol kendall is kylie biggest opps n kendall also likes sleeping with her sisters b/f n husbands on the low there pics of her booed up with scott behind kourtneys back(you can google it)
I feel that’s what Kylie Jenner does to Kendall Jenner. Kylie brought up an old cucumber scene video of Kendall from years ago again in 2024. Kylie is mean spirited and Kylie wanted to make Kendall an object of mockery to others and Kylie wanted people to talk about it again
Facts because if that was me I’d teach her and then let her cut it again on camera to cut the backlash if anything her mother and sisters look bad so they can stay there laughing they should be ashamed of themselves not laughing because they think it’s a haha kee kee momenr because it’s awful that they didn’t teach Kendall the bare minimum and Kylie bringing it up again 😴 definitely a demon because if they’re not a solution fitted person they’re only bringing problems like Kylie just being negative ‼️
It was I think you have to search for the available version. But the ebook is available on Google Play as well. You can get the physical copy as well on Amazon.
Bro my cousin who I confided in about being in a tough spot financially and who allowed me into her home with my Aunty just started flexing her new iPad and called me a “Brokeyyy” with the largest grin on her face . 😭
This is not the concern or character of a true woman from a two person home with a close father relationship will always understand there’s no chance of having the same full time father if you go after some else’s man. Doesn’t make sense as theirs no scarcity of men.
This is the main reason why I got into so many toxic friendships and relationships. I never had that filter to realize when someone was envious of me because they all acted just like my family. It’s very hard growing up with people who hate you and you just can’t understand why.
Saaaame. It’s super hard to identify when they’re your elders and the behaviors have been present since your childhood.
@ Yes and respect for elders is deep within my culture. So I was taught to respect them even with the catty and envious ways my elders would act. That filter for envy never stood a chance.
Yes! I saw so much jealous energy and insults disguised as jokes growing up that I thought it was normal when people acted like that.
@@Trox229 This!!! I used to think that was how you built a friendship 😭
The book lists different stages, signs, archetypes, and tactics to help people decipher. Envious people are often undetected because they are so calculated!
My dad wanted to come back into my life a few days ago I told him NO. We have a toxic relationship and I told him I wanted NOTHING else to do with him and I asked him NOT to call me anymore and blocked, deleted him number. Yes family can be so TOXIC and WICKED @ my age I'm over it.
Boundaries are sooooo important
This is so eye opening! A lot of us have dealt with this . They are the most dangerous people you’ll kinda end up meeting. They’ll sabotage you not knowing you’ll be sent to break chains from your families bloodline you’ll still thrive alone but when it’s time to help they’ll be shocked when you no longer give access
Such a good point
I realized it’s abuse, I have a family full of abusers.
It is definitely abuse
Yea when you grow up in the chaos its hard to see what's normal or not till you remove yourself and process all the toxicity and realize it was indeed abuse and knowing this will allow us to break the cycle.
I was taught to be kind, loving and forgiving to my abusers cause tbey are family. I was taught to tolerate the disrespect, humiliation, greed, selfishness, and unnecessary cruelness since birth. I was taught to feel bad for defending myself. The disfunction was forced upon me since a young age. The fact this video made me realize this hurts me deeply. But I am thankful. Thank you and god bless you
Such a good point! You have to differentiate forgiveness vs. enabling.
Literally my current situation. Recently found out my sister has been my biggest hater, all the while pretending to be loyal family at the same time. What a snake.
So disheartening 💔 and one thing about a snake, it may shed its skin but it’s still a snake 🐍. Be careful babes! 🙏
Same. All while competing with me, dating every guy that showed interest in me, getting locs after I got locs and trying to destiny swap. I caught the evil 😈 coming at me and looked and couldn’t believe it.
But I forgave. Healing ❤️🩹
Relatable! Mine said she doesn't want to talk to me for a year,put me on a "timeout" after she told a family members where I lived because they coerced it out of her.
This is me right now. I’m finally coming into terms that my mom has a lot of narcissistic tendencies and she is holding me back. She wants me to stay here in Missouri to get my name out here with the whole music thing. But one of the top music schools in the country offered me 17k and there are way more opportunities out there. Everyday work wise and music career wise. I’m a pretty girl and all I have is low tier retail and fast food options for work. It’s a breeding ground for envy and mistreatment. Anyhow I will just have to settle with getting a loan to live on campus the first semester, eventually move and just pay the price if that means I can give myself a better future.
Goodluck mama ♥️
You got this babes! Proud of you 🤍 Make sure the investment is beneficial in the long run and be cautious about taking out excessive loans. Use school as a means to an end.
Good luck to you ❤
You are spot on! I went no contact with mom and sister they thrive off chaos not to mention the story of precious hits home too much and is very triggering. To hear someone tell you your mom said she forgave him (my abuser/bio dad) and she thinks Im bitter that she doeesnt hate him which has never been the case. I knew then her selfishness and disdain for me knows no bounds.
I’m sorry you went through that babes! Many blessings to you, sending you so much love 🤍🤍🤍🤍
They are not sorry, they wanted to taste what it feels like to be you.😢
Yes yes yes. Very heartbreaking 💔
This is it. You nailed it
👀🎯
The Lion King reference at the end of the video gave me chills! Spot on.
Such a heavy scene 🥲
5:40 bystanders in a lot of cases are evil they are like sadists to an extent they get off on seeing you in pain
This is the unfortunate reality in most cases 😩
iConcur
My mom is the reason I can't watch the movie Precious. Its triggering.
Sometimes i have nightmares of my mom attacking me.
It’s such a heavy movie I couldn’t even reference too much of it for this analysis.
God bless you baby, you have a life ahead of you that does not entail abuse. You owe it to yourself to move forward and have better 🤍🤍🤍
I’m so sorry sis ❤ I wish you healing
Same but with my dad most of the time. And in my culture which is Armenian, we are taught to be super subservient and almost worshipping towards our parents. But that’s sooo effed up.
The mom is also her enemy how do you know your second daughter is sleeping with your eldest daughter's boyfriend and not say shit
FACTS! 🎯
That part. Not to mention Vivicas character tried to brush it off very casual in that scene like “hey I was walking by and he needed help and this happened sorry”. Like tf 😂😂😂😂😂.
Plus Big Mama was hiding money in Uncle Pete’s TV 📺… meanwhile, Terri taking out a second mortgage on her home to pay on Big Mama’s debt.
@@blueorgin
Vivaca is the pick me trope to me
Thank you for making this video as well as the others you’ve made like this your so right the holidays can be especially rough for those of us who are dealing with people like this in our families. In my case, the person like this in my life happens to be my own mother. I’m still trying to work on leaving hopefully sometime before my next birthday.🤞🏻✝️
You got this babes! 🤝💗
My entire family.
I’m sorry babe 💔
Thanks for sharing!!! Sending love to everyone who has overcome this dynamic and now lives in peace and prosperity ❤
Much love to you all this holiday season 💗💗💗
I excluded FAMILY from acting as if they are an enemy as someone on the OUTSODE..blinded by "you have to be there for family" "they are still family" crap. Yea and there are exemptions to the rule.
Very good point
@MsReadTheRoom you have your family and relatives lol
15:27 is a word! I’ve been reflecting on the last 9 years and whew chile going no contact was best decision I made. The common denominator presented themselves as my day one and I believed it because we were family.
So sorry you had to go through this babes! I feel for you all who deal with toxic family dynamics 🙏🤍
You know, you did your thing with this one. I just love your take and perspective! Having experienced this growing up and dealing with the envy of my stepmother and my stepsister, when I say you're spot on about the envy enablers! YOU ARE 1000% correct! They tend to fly under the radar, but are also just as much of a threat. They also may not like their position and looking to triangulate to find their way of "rising" in the family structure on the back of the target and to get that "validation" they seek. Great great video!!!!
Glad you enjoyed babes!
And yes! This is addressed in The Substitute and Calculated Co-Sign Technique sections in the book also. You are spot on! 🎯
@ ❤️❤️❤️
Don't associate or live with any toxics.Happy with my new man and small trustworthy circle.
Love this for you so bad! 🤞🤝
This was a very good explanation on enemies in your camp. I just wish people could pick up on the dysfunction far earlier than most do.
Glad you enjoyed it love! 💕 and I agree it disheartening to learn these things after the fact but it is never to late to learn!
Rewatching Soul Food as an adult i’ve come to the realization that the family treated Terri like garbage. Big mama set the tone for how the family treated Terri. They used & abused Terri. The movie made Terri look like the villain because of her standoffish demeanor. Kenny wasn’t smart enough to be with Terri anyway. Max was more of his speed. Max used her marriage to Kenny as a one up on Terri knowing that she would never be where Terri was in life. By Bird being the youngest she was probably spoiled & got away with everything. She probably was still messing around with Simuel because she didn’t set any boundaries & she went behind her husband’s back to Simuel to get him a job. Here are some fun facts: The late Whitney Houston & Halle Berry were considered for the role of Terri.
Whew, you made a great point! The elders in the family set a tone for how everyone is treating either by enabling or avoiding 🎯
Also both Whitney and Halle would have bodied this role as well!
@ After watching movies like This Christmas, Madea’s Big Happy Family & Almost Christmas i’ve come to the realization that Soul Food is the blueprint for black family movies. Every movie that came out after Soul Food mirrors it.
My parents, siblings , 1st and 2nd cousins on my father’s side. I’m strong though, and I know God has my back 1000%. God knows my heart ❤️ and he sees the evil they have been doing to me but it is okay! I’m still winning
AMEN baby, God always has you and will bless you in spite of the weapons formed against you! 🙏🤍
Hi Msreadtheroom thanks for all your publications you posted this year. It highlighted me so much ! Also I decided to buy the book green eyes. Although, I'm not emotionally ready to read it yet, I believe it is one of my best purchases of 2024. Thanks again and have a lovely time with your close ones ❤
🥹🥹🥹🥹💕💗💗💗💗 appreciate you babes! I’m glad it has been helpful 🙏🤍
You should def cover this topic more. I think a lot of jealousy stems from my family especially my older sister. My mom enables her. Now that I’m giving birth to my daughter I’m putting up secure boundaries, not necessarily keeping them out of my life but telling them how they will act around me and what I won’t allow.
I have a few videos posted that address family dynamics
@ I’ve watched them all 😭 this why I’m begging for more pls . Lmaoooo
This is my mother and all my sisters. I have gone no contact with them all.
So sorry you had to go through this. Setting boundaries is key.
Your analytical breakdowns are so eye-opening and extensive I love it! Thank you goddess 💗💗
Glad you enjoyed babes 🥹🥹💕💕💕💕🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍
Those of your own household will be your enemy. Mathew 10:36
Whew!
12:36 I was watching a live about the situation with the trophy wife and I kid you not she said her daughter was a sacrificial lamb.
It’s so unfortunate but it’s the reality
So timely
🤝💕
This is so real!! Thank you❤
Glad it was helpful babe 🙏🤍
There are other types of family fueds out there. I had a boss on a job I had in the past who told me he and his cousins hated each other. I had a co-worker on another past job who told me in her boyfriends family cousins don't like each other and they have gotten into physical fights. There are even other family fueds where one entire side of a family doesn't like the other side. Even still other family fueds where an entire family doesn't like another family - but this last Family Fued is a different subject.
Yup. There’s definitely layers to it.
This is exactly why I’m estranged from both sides of the family..too much toxicity
Not both sides 😩😩😩
Right on time
🤝💕
My whole family.
Omg, so sorry you had to deal with that toxicity babes 🥺
Now, that I’m older, in my opinion the Terry’s real enemy wasn’t the runaway cousin Faith, but her sister Maxine! Think about it, Maxine was the wild, fun and party girl! She ended up marrying her sister’s boyfriend and lived the struggle love life! Terry goes on to being the successful rich auntie everyone turned to for financial help! The party girl was stuck with a manual labor husband and home with 3 kids!!!
Really good point here!
They’re probably all jealous of Kendall Jenner but Kylie is the most and I’m worried because Kendall brings lame ass shady Kylie so close to her
LOL kendall is the jealous one they both jealous ladies but kendall is extremely jealous she more manipulative n underhanded while kylie is more in your face with her b.s lol kendall is kylie biggest opps n kendall also likes sleeping with her sisters b/f n husbands on the low there pics of her booed up with scott behind kourtneys back(you can google it)
Yeah, i noticed it too.
I noticed they always ostracized Kendall and because she does her own thing a lot like my family 😅
I feel that’s what Kylie Jenner does to Kendall Jenner. Kylie brought up an old cucumber scene video of Kendall from years ago again in 2024. Kylie is mean spirited and Kylie wanted to make Kendall an object of mockery to others and Kylie wanted people to talk about it again
Facts because if that was me I’d teach her and then let her cut it again on camera to cut the backlash if anything her mother and sisters look bad so they can stay there laughing they should be ashamed of themselves not laughing because they think it’s a haha kee kee momenr because it’s awful that they didn’t teach Kendall the bare minimum and Kylie bringing it up again 😴 definitely a demon because if they’re not a solution fitted person they’re only bringing problems like Kylie just being negative ‼️
Will your book ever be available for Kindle in the US? I want to read it so much!
It was I think you have to search for the available version. But the ebook is available on Google Play as well. You can get the physical copy as well on Amazon.
Bro my cousin who I confided in about being in a tough spot financially and who allowed me into her home with my Aunty just started flexing her new iPad and called me a “Brokeyyy” with the largest grin on her face . 😭
She keeps taking digs at me, I don’t think she likes me at all which is scary because she was my closest cousin
❤❤❤❤❤❤🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
🙏🙏🙏💗💗💗💗💗
This is not the concern or character of a true woman from a two person home with a close father relationship will always understand there’s no chance of having the same full time father if you go after some else’s man. Doesn’t make sense as theirs no scarcity of men.
Facts! No scarcity of men AT ALL