Breaking news: Taylor Swift is Simon's favourite singer. He knows all her songs and sings them in the shower while he uses her new Taylor brand beard oil.
@@stevegoodson9022 Oh come on. We all know you rub one out while smearing yourself with Beard Blaze oil and Rotting Turtle whenever Simon tells you all about the wonderful people at Nord! We saw your website you created for this using your Blaze coupon for Squarespace which first featured you manscaping yourself down below then up to with another blaze coupon from Dollar Shave club all while listening to Simons Casual Criminalist pod cast via Blinkest!
@@anarchyantz1564 wait, you DON'T use beardblaze oil on your nether regions to get super soft and supple "hair & skin"?? I call it the musntouchit moustache manicure. 😰
I just called him adorable on a megaprojects, or one of the channels to be honest not even sure now. LOLOLOL Him laughing made my day!!!!!!!!!!!! Kind of video you wish you could watch it brand new again, its so good.
@@burtdurger847 I think I paused and rewatched it twice even at risk of my comment being published too late to blow up. It was a calculated risk, but one that succeeded with 250+ likes, so thank y’all for following Fact Boi with the blaze and for liking my comment lol
That clip is possibly the greatest thing I've ever seen, and I've watched a LOT of shit in the last 30 years. Sam should start a "behind the blaze" channel that is literally just shorts of Simon doing this from all of the prior videos
This is, by FAR, the most entertaining video that Simon has released on any if his channels! The script, the editing, the ADHD segment, and Simon doubled over in laughter were all [chef's kiss] marvelous! Thank you for all the laughs! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 That ADHD logo really needs to be on some merch, as well. Pure genius from everyone this episode! 🏆 Well done 👏
Get back to the facts, fact boy. Don't need these ADHD segments, don't need more chipmunks, Alvin was enough, let it die. Please. I will literally pay for your UA-cam premium so you can never see ads again if you let it die.
@@ostentatiousyank Are his nine million facts-focused videos a week on his nine other channels not enough for you? Let him have this and let those of us who enjoy it have it
Unfortunately he has them chained up down there. Maybe they could use the sound of the street cleaners to cover as they attempt a shawshank style escape
The hilarity of laughing so hard at the Mountain Dew names that he can't even read them out loud made my day tbh. I knew about the "winning" entry but not some of the other ones 😂
@Josie Profio I had never heard of this and I’m sore from laughing til I cried hearing the winners and Simon’s reaction to this. OMG that was incredible.
I think the thing to takeaway from this is Skunk Ape's apparently have dogs and cell phones, if that's the case they probably have jobs which is why nobody finds them; they're all at work.
@@aceundead4750 I'm a beard oil tester for Beard Blaze. That is, when I'm not testing Head & Shoulders and Selsun Blue. Gotta find your niche, know what I mean?
Laughed myself into a coughing fit and almost pissed the bed. Barely made it to the toilet while stubbing my toe on my nightstand. Now I have a headache from laughing so hard. No regrets. Danny, you absolute GOD among legends! Never change🤣🤣🤣💀
@ridcom Oh God, I get a pounding head too when I laugh like a hyaena. My head really hurts, so do my sides. I agree, as those bad tats say NO REGERTS. Danny is the man. Simon trying to say fucking savage...oh man, I’m laughing again.
Our "Hero" is outgassing like a streaking comet, watching Simon wrestle with his own mind is the ultimate 21st century brain blast entertainment, this is the best spot ever posted
Horse drugs are legal and are usually more potent than street drugs... Also you can buy them off-the-shelf. Antivenom for rattlesnakes from the hospital cost like $20k per drop, but you can get like an ounce of horse antivenom for around $400 with an express courier in less than an hour without needing an ambulance.
@@runed0s86 I don't know where you are from, but the horses we had when I was a kid weren't venomous. I know, I was bit a few times, never needed horse antivenom. LMFAO
ADHD on air needs to be a monthly compilation of Simon’s best diversions. The intro could be like “I’m Simon, your boi with the ...” [jump cut to screen from Up] “Squirrel!”
3:23 It is not just a British thing, we have egg on spoon races and three-legged races in the U.S., though usually just as a silly game you play on certain occasions (like Easter in my family), rather than as an actual sport. I think I may have done them in elementary school P.E. (gym class) as well.
At my home village in Spain when I was a kid, we had egg on spoon races also, during the local festivities. The only twist is that we grabbed the spoon with our teeth and held the hands behind our backs. It was actually very tricky
Just to clarify, egg-and-spoon/sack/three-legged races are only done in primary schools (age 5-11) as a bit of fun in the UK, rather than anything serious!
Simon in hysterics and I couldn’t understand a word he was saying yet I’m laughing. A middle aged man in a bath, laughing at another man…laughing. What a perfect world.
Sam, well done on the "Falling Down" clip! The is not only "fine," but also so "vintage" that I had forgotten all about that movie, and it is a classic! *Chef's Kiss!*
That clip and that movie have contextualized everything from Karens to Sovereign Citizens to Incels for me. It was shocking enough to live in my head for over a decade now.
@@jimcappa6815 he can never be free! The Whistler would end up in prison No more Blaze, no more advice how to get more women fight for and become seriel killers And Daven would have to present all the TIFO s himself
I remember that 1984 thing, it was actually one of my earliest memories. My mom managed a McDonald's at the time, and while they got slammed with people wanting their free meals, she also had no qualms about employees taking a few of those scratch offs home. They got paid shit, so they could all use a free meal. So my early memory was my big brother teaching me to use a penny to scratch off the cards. Hundreds of them! We ate free McDonald's that whole summer. It was glorious to a 4-year-old child.
Only on Business Blaze: fails so colossal they have to be spelled collosal! Edit: oh, go ahead, spell it however you want, it's the episode that finally broke the Whistler, after all. :D
Me reading comments before seeing the whole episode: cynical. Disbelieving it could be *that* funny At the end: actual tears from uncontrollable laughter My compliments to the chefs who created this glorious entry for the internet’s enjoyment. Legends, one and all
I'll be honest, if I ever need a pick me up. Or something to cushion the low times, this is my go to video. It's a morphine drip of laughter and comedy! A master class in UA-cam video making! Thank you Danny! Also Simon you're pretty cool too.
Ahh, you make upon me great honor Comrades. In doing so, you bring further glory to Arstoztka! We are on the verge on a runaway chain reaction of GLORY!
Ok start the bidding on this glorious script including genuine Whistler tears & brutal slapping! Kids this is what ADHD, diet coke, too much coffee, cocaine & a UA-cam channel get you. The most EPIC BLAZING show of all time! Sam running the KFC rant on double speed was all kinds of awesomeness. But at 24 minutes in & Simon totally loses the plot laughing, was the LEGEND. Danny, you went above & beyond son! You unleashed a version of Simon on the world that will go down in history. I was laugh snorting until I cried. The tears & snot mingling on my face. Then the side cramps started & I cried even more. I found my inner masochist & rewatched this episode 2x. After I dried my tears, washed my face, changed my shorts from the uncontrolled peeing, I called in sick for the next day as I knew I would require the time to recuperate. 2 days later & I'm still a little dehydrated from the loss of bodily fluids. I now need a T-shirt that reads "I survived the Business Blaze of June 11/21. Simon, Danny & Sam....we your humble subjects are not worthy 🇨🇦❤.
Apart from Sam's Amazing editing, and Danny's captivating scripts, the most mystifying thing about BB, is the sheer dearth of knowledge Simon maintains, and the vast wealth of movies/artists/projects that he has not seen/is not aware of...
@Amanda Moshier Danny is LEGEND. He got Simon with that. I can get tickled just hearing someone else having that uncontrollable laughter. Well that happened and Simon not able to get himself back together made me loose it more. My head is pounding. Lol.
1:55 - Chapter 1 - Communist vs the big mac 10:10 - Mid roll ads 12:45 - Chapter 2 - Homerun 18:40 - Chapter 3 - Rita ora drops the mic 23:05 - Chapter 4 - Dub the dew
@Michelle Schmidt I hurt from laughing and when I laugh really hard, out of control with snorts, I sometimes get a headache. I have a laughing headache. God that was just so unexpected. Brilliant.
The squeal when Simon lost it was the part that broke me. I was watching this at work and trying to keep it together so no one knew I was fucking off instead of doing my job. But that made me laugh so hard I was crying.
Hypo- meaning low. Natre- referring to sodium or more formally natreum as it is shown by it's symbol on the periodic table of elements. Emia- meaning presence in blood. Low sodium presence in blood. Lol chubbyemu did a video on the hold your wee for a Wii one.
The "ADHD Radio" stuff is legit the most hysterical thing you guys have done in a long time. The lady in the car next to me thought I was laughing lunatic....... allegedly.
This would be awesome. Anonymous has absolutely gotten up to some pretty benevolent and hilarious shenanigans in the past along with all the cringe and badness. "Marble cake also the game" comes to mind
Watching Simon make high pitch noises of laughter and read those names off. Was the highlight of my day. Whole office watch the mountain dew segment and all died of laughter. YOU LEGEND!
Seriously one of the best business blaze episodes ever. Absolute Legend! Dub the Dew had me doubled over in hysterics laughing so hard my sides actually hurt! Apparently Simon enjoyed it too. Brilliant! Just incredible writing Danny and the ADHD meme was perfection Sam.
It's been 4 days since we've blazed, I saw a guy reading an actual book this morning and told him about this channel, since he was cracking a book at 4:30 am vs. smoking crack. I immediately told him to watch the Amazon reviews first. So anyway FOUR DAYS, Simon!!! #diddannyescape #whatareyoudoingwithyourlife #nowgetcracking #letsblazealready.
Oh my god, I have never laughed so hard during a single Blaze ep. ADHA On Air broke me completely, and then that last bit 🤣🤣🤣🤣 Pretty sure I've actually pulled muscles in my chest and sides from laughing, and most definitely dehydrated from the tears. Bravo guys, you've once again raised the bar.
I'm an OG BB viewer and have been watching Simon's videos on his other channels for years. This is by far the best! Thank you Simon, Danny, and Sam. Absolutely legendary and hilarious 🤣
My ribs started to ache and i realised i was holding my breath when you were laughing, it was just so funny to watch you be 'tickled'... Your team have a great creative rhythm/dynamic between you--this channel is finding its 'form' nicely, the structure and 'character' are clearer now, and Simon is gently becoming more 'relaxed and comfortable' in his style (or he's secretly losing his mind and we're all just watching it from our chair, thinking this is a persona he's 'developing' when really he's withdrawing into shadows of 'madness' and we've missed all the signs beneath his words of underwear and breakfast cereals...). :) But you look happy and healthy, and the good time you're having is the good kind of 'infectious'--your viewers are ready! It's time to laugh and learn and make some new memories--happy Summer 2021!
I'll always remember ours in 4th grade. They had a race between the teachers. Mine was in the lead, until she fell and broke her hip. That ended field day (what our school called it) real quick.
@@TechnoLawyer We didn’t have teachers racing, but we did have parents races. There were some complaints when the mum of some kids we went to church with took part, when she was younger she did run for Scotland.
@@katashworth41 Well, that's just whiny. Luck of the draw. That's like being mad when some high school sports team has someone who is a future pro athlete and they are so far ahead of everyone else that it unbalances everything. Just happens. Happened with the Swim team at my high school. We had a dude who ended up going to the Olympics twice. He was so much faster than your average high school swimmer that he'd win any event you put him in, even the ones that weren't "his" events. They'd put him in as many races as the rules allowed. Opposing teams would get mad.
I need more high-pitched Simon rants in my life Love the rants Simon Love the writing which initiates the rants Danny Love the editing of the rants Sam P.s. Simon I know Danny and Sam have restrictions with their internet freedom in the basement- so make sure they know we Loved them XD
The Business Blaze drinking game: 1. Take a drink whenever they show the He-Man "O" face. 2. Drink for as long as Simon goes off topic. 3. Drink whenever Simon says "Big Brain" 4. Take a drink whenever the dungeon in the basement is mentioned. 5. Drink when he refers to himself as "fact-boy" 6. Drink whenever Communism is mentioned positively. 7. Drink whenever Simon mispronounces a word. 8. Drink whenever Simon complains about the length of the script. 9. Drink whenever the "Danny chill" meme comes up. 10. Drink whenever Simon says "Legend or Legendary". If you survive this game you truly are legends, good luck lol.
That was my favorite Business Blaze in.a while. I smashed that like button! Also, Simon, just an fyi, I have a friend who worked at at Villa before covid, and they literally had a huge billboard advertising the apple shot flavor and other flavors you could add. There was never any reason to come up with a separate name, lol. Everyone would just ask for a Mountain Dew with apple flavor. :D. So all the controversy was totally unnecessary anyways!
I keep coming back to this…. it’s the all-time best episode hands-down. Between the ADHD disco and the frantic hysterical laughter…. No other episodes even come close
I remember that scratcher contest, as a kit I ate very well that summer. This also led to that joke on The Simpsons, where the US won every medal, and Krusty said "I will personally spit in every 5th hamburger!".
Summer Kick-Off Sale! Get 70% off NordPass at nordpass.com/blaze or use a code blaze. Plus, you get an additional month for FREE!
I think Simon would do well in the upper echelons of a communist society, in a papers please kind of way, what do you think Comrade Danny?
Yay, another sponsorship to ignore. At this point you could be sponsored by Nordfreeblowjobs and I'd still be skipping through the shilling
Breaking news: Taylor Swift is Simon's favourite singer. He knows all her songs and sings them in the shower while he uses her new Taylor brand beard oil.
@@stevegoodson9022 Oh come on. We all know you rub one out while smearing yourself with Beard Blaze oil and Rotting Turtle whenever Simon tells you all about the wonderful people at Nord! We saw your website you created for this using your Blaze coupon for Squarespace which first featured you manscaping yourself down below then up to with another blaze coupon from Dollar Shave club all while listening to Simons Casual Criminalist pod cast via Blinkest!
@@anarchyantz1564 wait, you DON'T use beardblaze oil on your nether regions to get super soft and supple "hair & skin"??
I call it the musntouchit moustache manicure. 😰
Simon cracking up at the whole “Dub the Dew” segment was the most adorable thing I’ve seen in a long time.
I just called him adorable on a megaprojects, or one of the channels to be honest not even sure now. LOLOLOL Him laughing made my day!!!!!!!!!!!! Kind of video you wish you could watch it brand new again, its so good.
I was having a dreadful day then the “dub the dew” just full on made me burst into tears laughing thanks Simon
Furreal I was just watching this part, legendary!
This is a whole new form of complete and utter meltdown. I approve.
@@andrewcorns2982 you should watch "any poll's a goal" by Internet Historian. Thank me later
Shit like the "ADHD On Air" segment is exactly why I love this channel
It also make Simon sound like a character from the Sorcerer’s Stone
Sam really does play an important role.
We need an ADHD timer.
Literally broke me. Had to pause to compose and the lost it as soon as i restarted it.
@@burtdurger847 I think I paused and rewatched it twice even at risk of my comment being published too late to blow up. It was a calculated risk, but one that succeeded with 250+ likes, so thank y’all for following Fact Boi with the blaze and for liking my comment lol
We need to have that “ADHD ON AIR” logo Sam made as a T-Shirt.
If I could like this idea more than once I would
my ADHD ass needs this
Or a sticker! I'd buy that
That clip is possibly the greatest thing I've ever seen, and I've watched a LOT of shit in the last 30 years. Sam should start a "behind the blaze" channel that is literally just shorts of Simon doing this from all of the prior videos
As someone with ADHD I'd love this as a shirt!
Simon's total meltdown laughter is a real high point for the series
It was, wasn't it?
Converting ounces to "sensible units" is an underrated bit.
Those are FREEDOM UNITS pal.
This is, by FAR, the most entertaining video that Simon has released on any if his channels! The script, the editing, the ADHD segment, and Simon doubled over in laughter were all [chef's kiss] marvelous! Thank you for all the laughs! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
That ADHD logo really needs to be on some merch, as well. Pure genius from everyone this episode! 🏆 Well done 👏
That's why I SMASHED DISLIKE!!!
AM I RIGHT PETER?!
Get back to the facts, fact boy. Don't need these ADHD segments, don't need more chipmunks, Alvin was enough, let it die. Please. I will literally pay for your UA-cam premium so you can never see ads again if you let it die.
This script is gonna be worth millions within the community 🤣
@@ostentatiousyank Are his nine million facts-focused videos a week on his nine other channels not enough for you? Let him have this and let those of us who enjoy it have it
It finally happened, Danny broke Simon, the high-pitch squeals are the perfect moment to escape the basement!!! :P
@twocvbloke Yes Simon is broke, I mean lost it broke. Love it. Love Danny. DANNY I LOVE YOU. LEGEND.
Unfortunately he has them chained up down there. Maybe they could use the sound of the street cleaners to cover as they attempt a shawshank style escape
All the comments around this one have a Blaze symbol, but not this, the best one. Savage.
The hilarity of laughing so hard at the Mountain Dew names that he can't even read them out loud made my day tbh. I knew about the "winning" entry but not some of the other ones 😂
@Josie Profio I had never heard of this and I’m sore from laughing til I cried hearing the winners and Simon’s reaction to this. OMG that was incredible.
I remember the whole contest but forgot some of the names.
yeah honestly i wish i could hear the rest of them
@@Swiftkitten882-7 were variations of gushing grannies and one was diabebus
Seeing Simon totally lose control made me follow. I had no idea his voice could go that high! Bravo to him, Danny and Sam.
I agree. But who is the other basement dweller whom they can't name?!
@@IntrepidFraidyCat How rude of me! I forgot all about him or her.. Kudos to the unknown, unnamed basement dweller!
@@p.l.g3190 😆👍🏻
Seeing you bust up in stitches like that... Totally priceless. Danny... You know what to do... 👍😁
Danny is a legend!
The ADHD break was absolutely top notch 👌 perfect format, flawless edit Sam you legend!
Agreed 👏👏👏
@joseph matos Classic...absolutely classic.
I almost peed myself when Simon squeaked with glee. All three of my dogs cocked their heads and look directly at my phone. Holy balls, I'm dying here!
IKR 😂😂😂 😹💜🖖
LOL! I could hardly breathe from laughing.
*love you screen name and avatar!😆
@@IntrepidFraidyCat thanks!
I think the thing to takeaway from this is Skunk Ape's apparently have dogs and cell phones, if that's the case they probably have jobs which is why nobody finds them; they're all at work.
@@aceundead4750 I'm a beard oil tester for Beard Blaze. That is, when I'm not testing Head & Shoulders and Selsun Blue. Gotta find your niche, know what I mean?
I was born USSR, and Simon's russian accent is my favourite russian accent on UA-cam.
Glory to Artoska.
Your profile picture 😂
Absolutely agree, i usually down vote his videos because i am ofended, but i up voted this!
@@stefanmuntean5289 I usually down vote BB videos, because SMASH DISLIKE!!
@@jaybeemhardscrote7466
Smesh Dislaik
Laughed myself into a coughing fit and almost pissed the bed. Barely made it to the toilet while stubbing my toe on my nightstand. Now I have a headache from laughing so hard. No regrets. Danny, you absolute GOD among legends! Never change🤣🤣🤣💀
@ridcom Oh God, I get a pounding head too when I laugh like a hyaena. My head really hurts, so do my sides. I agree, as those bad tats say NO REGERTS. Danny is the man. Simon trying to say fucking savage...oh man, I’m laughing again.
OH MY GOD! ADHD On Air is the best new bit on the Blaze since at least ETA.
As someone with ADHD, that was wonderful! 🐿️ Squirrel!
Watching Blaze Boy lose his shit was the highlight of my day.
@Alyssa I couldn’t stop laughing with him. I didn’t get A TEAR...I got TEARS. Damn it was great. Danny is LEGEND.
I laughed so hard my stomach cramped up. This video made my week.
fast talking Simon + ADHD got me 🤣
Our "Hero" is outgassing like a streaking comet, watching Simon wrestle with his own mind is the ultimate 21st century brain blast entertainment, this is the best spot ever posted
"outgassing like a streaking comet" is the only accurate description of the energy in this video
Oh man, I have been waiting for Danny to get to Dub the Dew. That one’s hilarious. And it apparently damn-near killed Simon.
Great times.
sorry sam but that ADHD moment on fast speed is now a must have for every future BB..
JUST DO IT
"on speed"
With a side of cocaine
Horse drugs are legal and are usually more potent than street drugs... Also you can buy them off-the-shelf. Antivenom for rattlesnakes from the hospital cost like $20k per drop, but you can get like an ounce of horse antivenom for around $400 with an express courier in less than an hour without needing an ambulance.
@@runed0s86 I don't know where you are from, but the horses we had when I was a kid weren't venomous. I know, I was bit a few times, never needed horse antivenom. LMFAO
Yes, it's a MUST now!😆
That ADHD On Air segment was amazing! I had to rewatch it a few times just because it was so awesome.
That was EPIC! Well done, Sam!!
This why we need to have more BB videos about business. We get awesome shit like this.
ADHD on air needs to be a monthly compilation of Simon’s best diversions. The intro could be like “I’m Simon, your boi with the ...” [jump cut to screen from Up] “Squirrel!”
Oh my goodness, yes. So very yes!!
Up vote this! 😂
Why is this still not a thing
3:23 It is not just a British thing, we have egg on spoon races and three-legged races in the U.S., though usually just as a silly game you play on certain occasions (like Easter in my family), rather than as an actual sport. I think I may have done them in elementary school P.E. (gym class) as well.
Don't forget running in a potato sack. Tg we ran on grass/sand/dirt....not dangerous at all..lolol
At my home village in Spain when I was a kid, we had egg on spoon races also, during the local festivities. The only twist is that we grabbed the spoon with our teeth and held the hands behind our backs. It was actually very tricky
At Old Home Days, we have the traditional Father/Son Egg Toss. Where you throw a raw egg back and forth at increasing distances until it breaks.
Field Day!! Where one glorious day in Spring, Elementary School stops instruction and we play games all day.
Just to clarify, egg-and-spoon/sack/three-legged races are only done in primary schools (age 5-11) as a bit of fun in the UK, rather than anything serious!
Business Blaze should be renamed to "Simon Unhinged" already.
LOL! BRILLIANT! 😆👍🏻🏆🏆🏆
Simon in hysterics and I couldn’t understand a word he was saying yet I’m laughing. A middle aged man in a bath, laughing at another man…laughing. What a perfect world.
I was trying not to burn myself while doing the ironing
Speed down to 75%. 50% makes Simon sound like he has consumed half a keg. Which, granted, is entertaining in its own right.
@@mwindanji6714 And OF COURSE I now have to watch it again & try that....DAMN, but I gotta see it!
I was already laughing so hard at his reaction and this comment HAS ME 🤣
The best part of Business Blaze is when Simon completely loses his 💩 when reading Danny's scripts. Well done, Danny, well done.
Hope nobody spots the colossal typo fail in the title of this video.
I mentioned it once but I think I got away with it.
opps lol
Simon allows you to comment from the basement? How meta. Go, intro boi!
Yeah, this is big brain time.
It boosts engagement. 😉
I did notice it Ddany but my standards have dropped since the pandemic started😉
Sam, well done on the "Falling Down" clip! The is not only "fine," but also so "vintage" that I had forgotten all about that movie, and it is a classic! *Chef's Kiss!*
That clip and that movie have contextualized everything from Karens to Sovereign Citizens to Incels for me. It was shocking enough to live in my head for over a decade now.
Wait… what if the cleaners and construction workers are smuggling parts to Danny so he can fix the car and make his escape?!
Don't let Simon know! #freeDanny
@@jimcappa6815 he can never be free! The Whistler would end up in prison No more Blaze, no more advice how to get more women fight for and become seriel killers And Daven would have to present all the TIFO s himself
But... Danny doesn't know how to drive...
@@KougajiCalling thankfully. So the plan fails
@@KougajiCalling let’s hope Sam does or it’ll be a really shot escape attempt
I agree that mountain dew naming bit had me rolling, watched it twice lol.
"Alien dong on fire" 😂😂
@BlaK HoRizOn oh I watched it more than twice. Christ. LMFAO.
Only twice? Those be rookie numbers. Blaze more
"236 sensible units" this had me in tears 😂😂😂😂😂
I remember that 1984 thing, it was actually one of my earliest memories. My mom managed a McDonald's at the time, and while they got slammed with people wanting their free meals, she also had no qualms about employees taking a few of those scratch offs home. They got paid shit, so they could all use a free meal. So my early memory was my big brother teaching me to use a penny to scratch off the cards. Hundreds of them! We ate free McDonald's that whole summer. It was glorious to a 4-year-old child.
Only on Business Blaze: fails so colossal they have to be spelled collosal!
Edit: oh, go ahead, spell it however you want, it's the episode that finally broke the Whistler, after all. :D
Sam THANK YOU for leaving that entire rant in!!!
Me reading comments before seeing the whole episode: cynical. Disbelieving it could be *that* funny
At the end: actual tears from uncontrollable laughter
My compliments to the chefs who created this glorious entry for the internet’s enjoyment. Legends, one and all
I'll be honest, if I ever need a pick me up. Or something to cushion the low times, this is my go to video. It's a morphine drip of laughter and comedy! A master class in UA-cam video making! Thank you Danny! Also Simon you're pretty cool too.
Simon: "Why don't you become more stupid."
Me: "Well, I'm here, Simon."
Underrated...
Yeah, I'm here for it, and I've watched all 7 hours of Blaze Boi plays Papers Please. Glory to Arstoztka!
Ahh, you make upon me great honor Comrades. In doing so, you bring further glory to Arstoztka! We are on the verge on a runaway chain reaction of GLORY!
Ok start the bidding on this glorious script including genuine Whistler tears & brutal slapping! Kids this is what ADHD, diet coke, too much coffee, cocaine & a UA-cam channel get you. The most EPIC BLAZING show of all time! Sam running the KFC rant on double speed was all kinds of awesomeness. But at 24 minutes in & Simon totally loses the plot laughing, was the LEGEND. Danny, you went above & beyond son! You unleashed a version of Simon on the world that will go down in history. I was laugh snorting until I cried. The tears & snot mingling on my face. Then the side cramps started & I cried even more. I found my inner masochist & rewatched this episode 2x. After I dried my tears, washed my face, changed my shorts from the uncontrolled peeing, I called in sick for the next day as I knew I would require the time to recuperate. 2 days later & I'm still a little dehydrated from the loss of bodily fluids. I now need a T-shirt that reads "I survived the Business Blaze of June 11/21.
Simon, Danny & Sam....we your humble subjects are not worthy 🇨🇦❤.
"Get it together Whistle!"
We must keep this alive
All those silly races (egg race, three-legged, and sack) definitely happen in the US also - usually on the ritual known as “Field day”
We have the same in the Netherlands but it’s called play outside day with classics like nail shitting cookie bitting
FUCK field day
10/10 editing as always - the 3 of you are the ultimate trifecta
Cracking episode. I love his 'adhd' moments. I have ASD and have a habit of going on tangents like that when something reminds me of something
When... When Simon is sped up, doesn't he sound a bit like Daniel Radcliff? lmao
I was under the impression that if you speed up *any* englishman, you get Daniel Radcliffe
I thought he was a little more Tom Felton than Daniel.
Apart from Sam's Amazing editing, and Danny's captivating scripts, the most mystifying thing about BB, is the sheer dearth of knowledge Simon maintains, and the vast wealth of movies/artists/projects that he has not seen/is not aware of...
Beard oil is made from the chicken grease drips from Simon's beard when he eats KFC in front of a chained up Danny. Makes cologne out of his tears.
"I've never played a Nintendo Wii"
Wii Sports for next BlazeBoyPlays
I had to turn on subtitles to try to understand the Mountain Dew names while Simon was in hysterics
@Amanda Moshier Danny is LEGEND. He got Simon with that. I can get tickled just hearing someone else having that uncontrollable laughter. Well that happened and Simon not able to get himself back together made me loose it more. My head is pounding. Lol.
1:55 - Chapter 1 - Communist vs the big mac
10:10 - Mid roll ads
12:45 - Chapter 2 - Homerun
18:40 - Chapter 3 - Rita ora drops the mic
23:05 - Chapter 4 - Dub the dew
“Get back to the facts, fact boy”...then continues to go on rant. Lol. Love it
Look, you can take almost any slice of this blaze and form another complete episode and scores of memes.
This is a Fractal Blaze.
Not going to lie every morning at 10am I check UA-cam to see if it’s a blazing morning
Sadly, I only get fresh blaze if I'm suffering from insomnia (3:11am here currently)
It's the first channel I check when I turn on the computer
7 pm for me I'm on Simon's time zone. I'm ashamed to have had a private life Friday evening so I had to catch up now. Bad legend.
What wont be a marketing failure? Rotting Turtle, an item selling before its even marketed as being sold as mine is already on the way.
Great editing Sam! That ADHD On Air was so funny! I have ADD so I always relate when Simon goes on those tangents! Another fine video!
Hey Sam the video editor, "ADHD on the Air" absolutely ROCKS! Nice job, Sir!
OMG I'm in the office laughing my ass off.
@Michelle Schmidt I hurt from laughing and when I laugh really hard, out of control with snorts, I sometimes get a headache. I have a laughing headache. God that was just so unexpected. Brilliant.
The squeal when Simon lost it was the part that broke me. I was watching this at work and trying to keep it together so no one knew I was fucking off instead of doing my job. But that made me laugh so hard I was crying.
Hypo- meaning low. Natre- referring to sodium or more formally natreum as it is shown by it's symbol on the periodic table of elements. Emia- meaning presence in blood. Low sodium presence in blood. Lol chubbyemu did a video on the hold your wee for a Wii one.
Oooh fellow chubbyemu watcher.
Glory to the mitochondria, power house of the cell
ADHD(7:25) & Blaze radio(15:05) : fine vintage memes for the Blazers 👌👌👌
The "ADHD Radio" stuff is legit the most hysterical thing you guys have done in a long time. The lady in the car next to me thought I was laughing lunatic....... allegedly.
Adhd on air 😚👌MWAH! Love when the odd Fbomb slips thru, love that zero effort was made to bleep that out. Gold.
Idea for a Business Blaze
The most glorious 4chan actions
This would be awesome. Anonymous has absolutely gotten up to some pretty benevolent and hilarious shenanigans in the past along with all the cringe and badness. "Marble cake also the game" comes to mind
Watching Simon make high pitch noises of laughter and read those names off. Was the highlight of my day. Whole office watch the mountain dew segment and all died of laughter. YOU LEGEND!
I couldnt stop laughing Whistler!!! Staaaaaph
watching Simon play "Papers Please" is both extremely stressful, but also mesmerizing... please keep playing!
OMG Sam you legend!! This was your best episode!! 🤣🤣🤣
Seriously one of the best business blaze episodes ever. Absolute Legend! Dub the Dew had me doubled over in hysterics laughing so hard my sides actually hurt! Apparently Simon enjoyed it too. Brilliant! Just incredible writing Danny and the ADHD meme was perfection Sam.
Loved the ending Danny. Been a while since I cried watching this. Especially hard as I was at work!
Here in South Carolina, it was called "Field Day"
Simon cracking up gives me life
It's been 4 days since we've blazed, I saw a guy reading an actual book this morning and told him about this channel, since he was cracking a book at 4:30 am vs. smoking crack. I immediately told him to watch the Amazon reviews first. So anyway FOUR DAYS, Simon!!! #diddannyescape #whatareyoudoingwithyourlife #nowgetcracking #letsblazealready.
I honestly can't remember the last time Simon had such joy on bb. He literally squealed in the middle of laughing 😂
The reaction to Dub The Dew makes this one of the best Blaze videos to date. Amazing
Play leisure suit Larry! Do it and #FlogDannyForLongerIntros
Outstanding work Fact Boy! the ADHD On Air was brilliant. Utter madness, and I LIKE it.
Sam, thank you for squeaky voice fact boy!
Oh my god, I have never laughed so hard during a single Blaze ep. ADHA On Air broke me completely, and then that last bit 🤣🤣🤣🤣
Pretty sure I've actually pulled muscles in my chest and sides from laughing, and most definitely dehydrated from the tears.
Bravo guys, you've once again raised the bar.
It is time once again to beg FACTBOI for the Korea cut covering our most GLORIOUS LEADER KIM and our most GLORIOUS DEMOCRACY North Korea
I was already in hysterics in anticipation of the dub the dew, but when Simon lost his shit I think I was mirroring him. Best Business Blaze ever.
"Rita Ora Purchased 6million followers" is more like it
Allegedly
Old enough to remember that promotion. I even have some of the eagle memorabilia pins.
PS Love the ADHD sign (and the fast forward)
The US has those too. They're usually called track and field days
I'm an OG BB viewer and have been watching Simon's videos on his other channels for years. This is by far the best! Thank you Simon, Danny, and Sam. Absolutely legendary and hilarious 🤣
Danny. Communism. Infidels. Memes.
Let's go.
My ribs started to ache and i realised i was holding my breath when you were laughing, it was just so funny to watch you be 'tickled'... Your team have a great creative rhythm/dynamic between you--this channel is finding its 'form' nicely, the structure and 'character' are clearer now, and Simon is gently becoming more 'relaxed and comfortable' in his style (or he's secretly losing his mind and we're all just watching it from our chair, thinking this is a persona he's 'developing' when really he's withdrawing into shadows of 'madness' and we've missed all the signs beneath his words of underwear and breakfast cereals...). :)
But you look happy and healthy, and the good time you're having is the good kind of 'infectious'--your viewers are ready! It's time to laugh and learn and make some new memories--happy Summer 2021!
Ah sports day, having to do the obstacle course cos I was too rubbish at everything else.
I'll always remember ours in 4th grade. They had a race between the teachers. Mine was in the lead, until she fell and broke her hip.
That ended field day (what our school called it) real quick.
@@TechnoLawyer We didn’t have teachers racing, but we did have parents races. There were some complaints when the mum of some kids we went to church with took part, when she was younger she did run for Scotland.
@@katashworth41 Well, that's just whiny. Luck of the draw. That's like being mad when some high school sports team has someone who is a future pro athlete and they are so far ahead of everyone else that it unbalances everything. Just happens.
Happened with the Swim team at my high school. We had a dude who ended up going to the Olympics twice. He was so much faster than your average high school swimmer that he'd win any event you put him in, even the ones that weren't "his" events. They'd put him in as many races as the rules allowed. Opposing teams would get mad.
I need more high-pitched Simon rants in my life
Love the rants Simon
Love the writing which initiates the rants Danny
Love the editing of the rants Sam
P.s. Simon I know Danny and Sam have restrictions with their internet freedom in the basement- so make sure they know we Loved them XD
Oh... my... GOD! "ADHD on air"!!!
That or the ADHD loading bar... I don't know how to choose! SAM, YOU LEGEND!
Comrade we are indeed here
I'm proud to have been alive to see the Dub the Dew happening live. When will companies learn not to ask the internet to do stuff?
Simon losing his shit over the Mountain Dew campaign is hysterical. Makes me miss the days of quality Hitler memes, before the pearl clutching.
Simon just cracking up at mountain dew promo... freakin legend 😝
The Business Blaze drinking game:
1. Take a drink whenever they show the He-Man "O" face.
2. Drink for as long as Simon goes off topic.
3. Drink whenever Simon says "Big Brain"
4. Take a drink whenever the dungeon in the basement is mentioned.
5. Drink when he refers to himself as "fact-boy"
6. Drink whenever Communism is mentioned positively.
7. Drink whenever Simon mispronounces a word.
8. Drink whenever Simon complains about the length of the script.
9. Drink whenever the "Danny chill" meme comes up.
10. Drink whenever Simon says "Legend or Legendary".
If you survive this game you truly are legends, good luck lol.
That was my favorite Business Blaze in.a while. I smashed that like button! Also, Simon, just an fyi, I have a friend who worked at at Villa before covid, and they literally had a huge billboard advertising the apple shot flavor and other flavors you could add. There was never any reason to come up with a separate name, lol. Everyone would just ask for a Mountain Dew with apple flavor. :D. So all the controversy was totally unnecessary anyways!
The ak by far is the best thing to come out of russia. Rip papa Kalashnikov
Well this was the best Friday gift I could've received!
One of the best, well done Simon/Danny .
Had a tear in my eye chuckling away.
I keep coming back to this…. it’s the all-time best episode hands-down. Between the ADHD disco and the frantic hysterical laughter…. No other episodes even come close
I remember that scratcher contest, as a kit I ate very well that summer. This also led to that joke on The Simpsons, where the US won every medal, and Krusty said "I will personally spit in every 5th hamburger!".
*looks at the inside of the cereal box on his desk* hey.....