Millennial parents frustrated that boomer grandparents aren't around
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- Опубліковано 4 гру 2023
- Some grandparents say they don't want to spend their golden years as caregivers.
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#nyc #parenting #kids
Grandparents used to be in their 40s and 50s when the grandkids came along. People are having children much later in life, so grandparents are now 60s-70s+, and they're fk1ng TIRED.
THIS!!!
Tough shit
Exactly! People were grandparents in their late 30s and early 40s decades ago.
I’m 70 and spent the day watching my youngest grandsons yesterday. 2 am 5 months. It was no joke and exhausting! As much as I love them I could not do this all the time. Nor do I want to.
Lots of Grandparents are still working
They can use some PTO to help once in a while then.
@@jbp5836 take vacation time to do free labor? 😂
When I was a kid, my grandparents were not there. When my kids were little, my parents did not babysit, or look after them, or have them for sleepovers. When my grandkids were little, I had to get custody and raise them. Now that I have great grandkids, I am done, I'm tired of looking after kids. So please, let me have some me time before I die.
My grandmother born 1898 told my Mom; “I raised mine. You raise yours”
I’d like to add my mother and grandmother were extremely close. They double dated as sisters.
73 years young. My Mom shares with me and my siblings, there are 7 the same quote. We were also told, they'd babysit if we were going on a job interview or were in the hospital. No more, no less.😊😊😊😊
i just want my mom to call my children and tell them happy birthday, didnt think that was asking for much
Nah , it’s not too much
Well, my mother and father had 8 children and before they could blink, they had a total of 29 grandchildren! Granted I only had one child, a few of my siblings had twins and so on. I was the baby so I grew up with most of my nieces and nephews and everyone helped out. Now can you imagine how many great grandkids those 29 grandchildren produced? Out of this world.
We millennials loved our grandparents so deeply NOT because their “full” lives were so cool, but because they were selfless and full of love for family.
Speak for yourself. My Boomer Grandma criticizes everyone, judges their morality constantly, and the moment you criticize her she tells you to stop talking back even when she barges into everyone's business.
Id rather my parents come back to life than deal with her another day.
@@LongcrierInProgress well that makes sense because shes a boomer, most grandparents of millenials are silent generation. My parents are boomers and are completely deadbeat grandparents that only want to partake in my kids lives through facebook
Yes this! The boomer generation is so selfish! All they care about is their friends. My grandparents were/are amazing. My mil
And step father don’t show hardly any interest in being there for me or my kids but want my son around.
@user-vq6qi9yc8r my parents were silent generation my grandfather bought his house cash. And was so old he didn't take a driving test. Born 1914. My dad was born 1941
Too many are abusing their parents as default babysitters and banks.
My mom(rip) was extremely close with the grand babies, almost like a 2nd mom. I’m 38, don’t have kids but I’m really close to the children in my family. They stay over at my house all the time. It’s truly a blessing to have them around. We exchange ily’s every time.
When I was a kid, we went to our grandparents house very often. Loved it over there. It was a big blended southern family. They were 30 mins away. Most times Ma would stay too but we got dropped off often. They were in their 40’s-50’s with 9 grown kids, and still worked. They put us to work too. Grandpa had a huge garden and yard so we always helped out. We had fun snapping peas, raking, folding clothes, running around outside, finding bugs.
Their home was HQ for all the holidays. So was my great grandmothers’ houses. That’s how we got close bonds with our cousins, aunts and uncles.
Kids always behaved ourselves over there because we knew grandma and granddaddy wouldn’t take any nonsense respectfully. They instilled a level of discipline and dignity that we didn’t learn from our parents. I think that may be the issue with grandparents and parents today…they haven’t mastered the skill of respectfully commanding respect so they can’t handle being around kids. Kids are what you make them.
I'm 44 I can relate to this so much. I have a 15 Yr old boy had no help with anyone else looking after him. He doesn't really see anybody he hates school. Just lives on his computer. I'm hoping things get better. I feel I had it good growing up.
I am always there for my grandchildren. I dont trust anyone with my grandchildren. I would never hurt or miss treat them I cant feel they are safe if its not with family .
I AM WITH YOU ON THAT ONE
LOUDER FOR THE ONES IN THE BACK!!! Boomers gonna boom tho.
Absolutely, grandbabies are the greatest gift ❤
The grandparents did not have those babies, the parents did. You can't fault the grandparents, they raised their kids and paid their dues. This is the grandparents time to live the remainder of their years doing what they want to do.
You must be one of those grandparents
I beg and beg to see my grandkids! I have 5 and have never held a baby! 😢
Mine is a different story. When I was a kid, my grandmother raised me. When I had a kid, my parents(mother) never visited during the toughest of my times with the child(and I mean it!!!) because she is scared of working hard. She sent me to my grandma for the first 3 years but she is saying that she is done with parenting!!!! And guess what I will do to my daughter and grandchildren??? I WILL BE THERE FOR HER NO MATTER WHAT!!!
I owned my own business into my 60’s so not a lot of time for babysitting grandkids. And now I’m tired and my body hurts.
You know why. It's because millennials believe in gentle parenting and are raising brats. I don't blame boomers for avoiding you all.
gentle parenting is not a widely adopted model amongst millennials, myself included. Boomers are the ones who brought in participation awards etc. You think the kids came up with that idea?!
do you weed your garden by pulling the leaves because you cant see the roots?
Boomers also popularised divorce and destroyed the nuclear family and hence left bad tastes in the mouth of their own kids, yet will expect to be looked after when theyre old (even though they have more wealth than their kids)
not exactly role models are they?
Preach !
@@theresaruiz-dn1peyes but you can’t expect your parents to be that break
The kids that the millennials are raising are brats. Many of them are so disrespectful.
@keimorgan5654 coming from the generation that said "don't trust anyone over 30"
Early 60s boomer here. My mother-in-law did absolutely less than zero to be a grandmother. I mean on the day your first child was born. She sent you a letter saying she didn’t like babies. She wasn’t comfortable small children don’t ask her to babysit. She got loads of help from her mother, but she just wasn’t into it, she held the place of honored grandmother at both my children’s weddings. They both piss off, apparently just like she did and wind up with my grandchildren catering to me anyway.
Its not a GP obligation.
If all you want is time with the grandparents then spend time with them. All of you. Don't just drop your kids off so you can have your own time.
All of my grandparents except an elderly granddad were gone before I was born. My kids' grandparents were never caretakers for them, they lived out of the area. My kids, who now also live out of my area due to career opportunities, sorted out childcare preferences before they even had kids. Of course I visit, but they planned ahead for their family needs. Don't have much sympathy for people who do no planning for their own choices, yet expect others to accommodate them, especially if the grandparents are now in their 60's, 70's or 80's.
My parents dont help at all . Never offer to take the kid for a day . He’s four they’ve watched him less than ten times and he’s only slept there 2-3 times . They seem to never want to watch him but want to face time all day and expect me to bring him there for a few hours not watch him while he’s there and get him out once he gets too loud .
Sounds like he's poorly behaved and they love him but can only take him in small amounts of time.
Sounds like grandparent behavior. Millennials have expectations. Maybe you should have talked more and discussed the role you thought you wanted them to fulfill when you had kids . You would have heard their and then there would not be any hurt or anger at unmet unspoken expectations. Parents are not mind readers and they don’t owe you anything. They would like a grown up relationship with their children, but being a babysitter. Probably not .
@@sandysmith71 you don’t know the situation so really sounds like you have an issue with your kids .
Felt this
It's true that old people today are more selfish than the generations before them, but the younger generations are too. It's a humanity problem.
Not just boomers Gen X feels the same way take care of your own children we had to
Preach it
It’s true! Many kids of Gen X went to daycare and preschools while both parents worked. Right now, they are planning to live in Mexico somewhere to retire. 😂.
My mum would always drop us off at our grandparents house to be watched. Every Sunday, every public holiday, at least a few weeks over the school holidays, or when mum just wanted to go on a bender. The first thing mum said to me after our first kid was born was that she wasn't a built in baby sitter. For years my mum wouldn't help us out at all. If she did agree to watch the kids, she would always cancel that morning and scree us over. Now she's complaining that we kept the kids away from her when they were little.
That's the kind of shit most millennial parents have to deal with now.
You’re not even exaggerating. That’s my boomer mom. She lives 20 minutes away and can’t be bothered to ever try to see her 4 beautiful grandchildren. She never calls, she never text, she never stops by, she never comes to any sporting events, she never comes to dance recitals. She doesn’t know anything about them. But what did I expect? She was a neglectful selfish boomer mom, so it’s not like things really change.
But I promise you this. I’m not gonna be there when she needs me when she’s rotting away in a nursing home.
Literally 3 minutes away, around for 2 months of the year, rest is spent traveling everywhere else. These are not my parents though, mine are gone.
Out of curiosity, did your grandmother and mother have full time jobs? Did you have your kids after the age of 30? My grandmother was almost old enough to be my mother. Both of them got married in their early twenties. The timing and life circumstances might make a difference.
This!!!!
My life is exactly the same and I am a millennial. Our grandparents were very helpful and the parents got spoiled and lazy. They don't want to raise their kids or to raise their grandchildren.
Back in the day, grandparents were across the street or across town. Now they’re across the country. Besides, granny being the automatic babysitter is over and done with.
Especially since millennials don't teach their kids to respect elders.
Yea, we're frustrated. The boomer parents dropped us off every chance they got. They had a village, we don't.
I am sorry I hardly ever was at my grandparents and neither did I see my friends at their go
I went to my grandparents pretty much every Sunday but my parents saw it as THEIR obligation to allow them time with the kids. We (boomers) pretty much did the same when our kids were young and they had a great relationship with my Mom (their only living grandparent). The first thing my mother said when her first grandchild was expected “I don’t babysit.” And she was 46!! We didn’t resent it, we thought it was funny. I didn’t become a grandmother until I was in my sixties and I adore the time I spend with my grandchildren when their parents are with us as well. Family time! But I babysit for my grandchildren now two days a week. It’s absolutely exhausting and doesn’t create a real sense of family. And just recently I have come to the conclusion that my SIL (“stay at home dad”) acts like we have joint custody or something! Like those are just our days to take the kids, doesn’t matter if he has plans. I do it for my daughter who has a very demanding job, but damn I am not all that happy about it. I hear a lot of talk about selfish boomer grandparents. Then someone explain to me why at school pickup and at the playground etc. it is predominantly grandparents I see?
Why can’t you just say what you think to the person who is causing the resentment? I never understood why are American people afraid to speak up their mind.
News reporter Tread lightly 😂😅😂😅✌️
My grandma kept my two oldest kids. She even took them to school and picked them up. My grandma was awesome! Maybe because she had access to her great grandkids.
I'm 66 and my husband and I had our first grandchild born a month ago. We live very close to her but our daughter in law is making it very difficult for us to even see the baby. We were so looking forward to babysitting our granddaughter and it doesn't look like that's going to happen. We are so heartbroken.
My mother refused to watch my children unless it’s an emergency.
Can't really blame the grandparents. Being old and tired doesn't work well with highly energetic children.
Wouldn't have so much energy if it wasn't for all the sugars
The boomers want to see their own children as much as the grandchildren 3:02
I raised my siblings now my parents don't want anything to do with my kids.
The kids have no home training and you can’t discipline them.
I am dead in the middle of the sandwich phenomenon. My mother had all of the support in the world when it came to raising me. So she was able to live a full life. And no one had a problem with that. When I had my child (her 1 and only grandchild) it was crickets for me. Very sad because my son actually said to me, Mom you have a mom but I don't have a grandmother. I said what are you talking about, my mom IS your grandmother. He said, you don't understand, Where is she? That was the hardest thing I had to digest when it came to my mother's absence in our life. He said she manages to come around when she will leave with a gift in her hand for Christmas, Mother's Day and her birthday. What a blow! Now my mother is in Assisted Living with regrets. I am not holding any grudges or anything. She is well taken care of. And we visit her every 1-2 weeks now that her health is stabilized. But I wish it were different. What makes it worse it that I never needed a dime from her. Never NEEDED her to babysit but WANTED her to have that desire to spend time with her grandchild. Not one time did my mother call and say, I want to swing thru and spend some time with y'all or my grandson. Or just take him to the mall and walk around and hold his little hand and give him all the kisses in the world. Just her presence is all I wanted and what we needed.
Boomer here. Babysit, YES. Provide daycare, NO.
They don’t have to watch their grandkids but they shouldn’t expect help from those kids when they’re teens either
Keep tht same energy when you are in a nursing home and wondering why no one comes to visit.
I know for a fact i am setting my life up so i can help my children with their children. Its easential in modern society. Daycare costs are insane and is the reason why women leave the workforce.
Keep the same energy
I was literally about to say the exact same thing ! I met a grand mother at the park who said she helps with her grand babies so that one day they in return will help take care of them. I applauded the women and agreed! I also realize that when you bring kids into the world, it’s inevitable that they may also have kids of their own!
Yup I can see why they don’t babysit for you. That sense of entitlement creeped out of you again. Baby boomers aren’t afraid of growing old alone . So keep your psychic warfare to yourself
THIS!!!!!!!!
You could go in the nursing home before your mother. Have you thought about that
I love my granddaughter and I would love to help raise her
With the culture being anti family, just pay taxes, what does anyone expect
Then boomer parents need to stop pestering their millennial kids to give them grandbabies.
I think the boomers need to be happy that their family wants to be with them. Then they get old. Maybe they wont take care of you when you old.😅😂
Yup I can smell your entitlement in your retaliation. You need to do for me OR else .
Mama gotta have a life to
I have been waiting for grandkids for over 10 years. They’re still not ready, perhaps in 5-10 more years. Furthermore, some of these grandparents are taking care of their parents. Others are helping their Millennial/Gen Z kids, who are still at home because housing is so expensive. There’s no empty nest.
Millennials will GET OVER IT!!!😊
Then they shouldn’t have had help raising us and expect us to help you when you’re old!
A FRIGGIN MEN!! 👏👏👏💯
Well just wait till GenX become grandparents lol
Some GenXers are already grandparents.
Laughing in genx
Some Gen x still having babies😂😅😂
@@muhammad17115 It’s sad
Some of Gen x are still taking care of their children and parents. Now they are being asked to take care of the grandchildren too.
When YOU have children they are YOUR responsibility. As a grandmother I raised mine, my mother would only watch them for 3 hours max once a month. What people don't remember is that we the grandparents have raised, worked and have waited for our retirement to go and do things we did not get to do because we had RESPONSIBILITIES and no one took those away because we were tired, wanted to go out or wanted a break. Grow up life is hard, deal with it.
Me and my families stolen identities used here and shirleen is not me!! Also shutdown came up randomly while putting her name that isn't in my phone, badge randomly came up. Yet I didn't get to exercise my civil and human rights and these people think they own us
My mom came here to live with my grand parents but they and her were never allowed to speak to us
Of course millennials want their parents to (fill in the blank)...it's never ending. Be responsible for your own lives.
Sign em up for the army! They seem to be pretty desperate nowadays!!!😅😅😅😅
Embarrassing
What a bunch of losers
I’m a millennial parrot and my grandparents was not there because they were dead so now I am parent my parents are gone my son has no grandparents swear my generation are a bunch of cry babies
No different from how things changed in your generation, things have changed for their generation also. They do not believe in what their parents did of taking care of g/children. Rest assured you are going to be doing the same, running far away, living your life and on a different and even wider scale. So respect their generation and don’t compare them to their parents generation as you do not like the comparison with your generation verses theirs ❤️
I dont want to babysit! Ill take them places when they are older!
But you got time for UA-cam
@@r0bkush UA-cam doesn't pitch fits or require diaper changes
@@r0bkush😂😂😂😂😂😂. Exactly 😅😅
Selfish boomer! Have fun aging
Then don't complain about them not wanting to go or knowing who they even are, what they like etc.
REMEMBER! SOME OF US BOOMERS, DIDN'T HAVE OUR PARENTS TO HELP US! WE DID IT BY TEAMING UP AND GOT IT DONE!! ALSO! OUR GRANDPARENTS WERE STILL WORKING TOO! QUIT YOUR COMPLAINING AND RAISE YOUR CHILDREN! YOU WANTED!
You have a point but also take into account that those same children who are gonna have to figure it out and not complain may not be available if you find yourself on a fixed income needing somewhere to live and or needing a caregiver of some sort. Be careful what you wish for.
@firestar1215 REMEMBER Again! Some of boomers were on a fixed income, without foodstamps, HUD, or ANY OTHER ASSISTANCE! Due to myself at the time being a waitress and begging for assistance to feed my two kids! Was told at the time early 80s, I made to much .. $1.25 over the limit! No matter what time frame you're in! Got to have a plan to fight and insuring your children are taken good care of!
But you on the damn phone posting comments!!?!!!? You got time to learn the iPhone and not your family tho…. God don’t like ugly people
Why are you yelling Cynthia? Classic boomer
That may be the case on an individual baises but other than that this is a complete full of shit statement. Get the fuck out of here no generation has had it easier than boomers
There's actually the gen x generation in between millennial and boomer, and yes most of us are still working ourselves and don't have time to raise our your for you, figure it out.