The rest of the story of the lady getting stabbed. A police officer turned the corner when the lady was running on to the side walk. He and some other people stopped to help. I gave my account of what i saw to the police and went about my day. Still not believing what I saw.
Gotta love The DickeyDines Show, it's like having two far-away friends and every upload notification makes me wonder with excitement what these two brilliantly awesome goofballs have come up this time. Love both of you, never stop doing what you do!
When I was in elementary school some guy walked into the bathroom I was in with a huge gash on his face, cleaning it up in the sink and he looked at me and said "never get into a knife fight."
So at the end of the street that I grew up on there are woods. Back in those woods, deep enough that you can't see it from the street, is an abandoned red house. Me and my friends used to go back there and climb up onto the roof of the house for shits and giggles. One time me and my friend were looking after his 13 year old cousin and decided to take him back there after dark. This time we managed to find a way into the house only to find at least a dozen used condoms lining the floor. To scare him we made up a story of how a girl was gang raped and murdered in the house and thats why it was boarded up and abandoned. As we were leaving the house, we heard gunshots coming from the woods and then the impact of bullets on the house. Needless to say we fucking hauled ass out of there.
I saw an old man jump out the passenger door of a van and take a diarrhea dump right on the edge of my parent’s woods. My dad and I tried to stop him, but it was already too late.
I've got waaaayy too many crazy things that i've seen. From walking in to one of my friends performing oral sex on another friend (at my house) to an old crazy lady looking at me and was convinced i was a member of slayer (i was only 21 at the time) to seeing a friend wearing a gorilla mask chase another friend in a banana costume during halloween in highschool. The list goes on.....but by far the craziest thing i've seen is this crazy homeless guy tell me and my friends that McDonalds was built from the ground up by his family (we were at mcdonalds) and when we had to leave, he said "oh! Where do you plays live? I'll teleport you there! " we didn't even say anything and he begins to concentrate so hard that his veins were showing and his face began to turn red like a tomato. I'm fairly certain he shat his pants just by how his face was.
True story, was in jail when a line of children actually came and was staring at our pod. Does happen but all the CO's told us if anyone even blinked we would've been tased sprayed, then beaten to hell in the hole. Quietest day room we ever had lmao.
I was in 5th grade when some dude rolled up in a car next to another kid across from me, the kid started running away saying "I don't know you!" and the old dude grabbed him, put him in his car, and drove off, I was hiding in a bush the whole time.
When I was a Paramedic student we got called to an alleged pedestrian struck at around 10 or 11 O'clock. Turns out that wasn't what happened, but the patient still needed some help anyways. He was a homeless guy who said he had shot up some crystal meth the night before and had been drinking rubbing alcohol that morning. He agrees to come into the ambulance with us so we can assess him without everyone on the street watching. We sit him down on the jump seat, and he's behaving well and being cooperative, until I notice he has a little cut on his arm that he's suddenly fixated on. So I tell him to hold on while I get some gauze to bandage that up. In the span of time it took to turn around and pull a roll of gauze out of the cupboard and turn back around, he had started super vigorously trying bite chunks of skin and flesh off his arm around the cut. It took both myself and my preceptor to wrestle his arm out of his mouth and keep it out. The whole time we're rushing to the hospital (maybe 3 minutes away) he had been going back and forth between telling us that he'd stop and behave, to going back to trying to bite his arms off. Then suddenly he stops, looks at me and smiles with bits of skin and blood between his teeth and says "You've got a cute nose", and then goes back to trying to eat his arm without skipping a beat. It was the most bizarre and surreal thing I've ever seen while wearing a uniform (or otherwise for that matter).
That just gave a whole new meaning to soccer balls! My husband was driving home from work one night and saw a deer jump out in front of a guy on a motorcycle. The guy hit the deer and was impaled by its antlers. The guy died on scene.
Note to self: Never watch a DickeyDines video while trying to take a drink, because there's a chance that Austin will say some fucked up shit like cooch crumpet and I'll run the risk of spitting out my drink in laughter all over my phone.
Just about a couple weeks ago me and my band were playing a gig out in Pelham New Hampshire. Long story short before we went on the guy hosting the show said their was gonna be a "freak show halftime show" and everybody had no clue what was going on. So they come up on stage in clown make up with one guy playing a banjo (there were three of them in the show) so for the leaders first act he took three volunteers and told the to spit in a cup the best loogy they could get and then proceeded to drink it . Then after he chugged a whole bottle of glass cleaner to wash it down. His second trick was with tic tacs he had three of them stuck one in his nose and the other two in each eye and made all three of them come out of his MOUTH. ALL THREE. While he was recovering from that another guy came up and did some not so impressive stuff. But for the leaders final act he had a tiny orange envolpe with a string and four brand new razor blades.. he then SWALLOWS all four razor blades one at a time then swallows just enough of the string so he can still grab it and one by one pulls out all four razor blades which were now tangled in the string.
The craziest thing I’ve ever seen is two guys read a bunch of comments even though most of them sounded extremely fabricated and not one of them doubted their credibility for a second...
In second grade we had this tree on the play ground and this 1st grade girl (who was later nicknamed mullet grandma) always wore baggy clothing and sweat pants one day she stood by the tree and pulled down her pants and underwear, the teacher out that day began to yell and run towards her telling her to cover up, the girl proceeded to piss herself and when the teacher got closer she sprinted down the soccer field with her pants at her ankles and was caught once she tripped although she made it pretty far
4:55 For Criminal Justice class. I’ve had the same thing happen. Our class went to the men’s maximum security prison, and one of the inmates just stands in the window and starts going at it.
My sister is a nurse and she works in dialysis (they purify soiled blood) and they hook patients to a bunch of tubes and one of the nurses didn’t properly lock the tube in place. It detached and the patient got covered in his own blood. When telling me this story, she said "he wasn’t only pale from the blood loss"
I forgot until now, but after a concert in San Diego I was walking to my ride that was next/behind the venue and there was a store that was for lease or something at the end of stores close by that had a concrete barrier about 4 feet high around it, as I walked by I heard something and looked....saw a dude with his pants down and a lady bent over in front of him, made eye contact with him for a second and continued to walk, super awkward
This isnt the craziest, but when i was 9, my first guitar teacher got arrested for pedophilia and child pornography, lucky I stopped lessons and decided to self teach myself before I he was able to get me
The rest of the story of the lady getting stabbed. A police officer turned the corner when the lady was running on to the side walk. He and some other people stopped to help. I gave my account of what i saw to the police and went about my day. Still not believing what I saw.
That is truly insane....damn.
@@ArkaeaFCL3 i scrolled down hoping so badly to see this here. thank you for delivering.
What happened with the husband
Epic prank bro
Wow
"You know this show works just because of you"
Tomislav Gredisnjak that depressed hit of reality moment 😂😂😂
he knows it why do u think he made a show with him. jareds made me laugh for sure but a lot lot less often. Austin is a comedian.
Cooch Crumpets!
I think they are perfect, since Austins jokes are fucking funny as hell, and Jareds laugher tops it off.
Wholesome as heck
I once saw The DickeyDines Show have a regular upload schedule with audio that is clear. It's nuts.
BugsyBadger so you heard they had an upload schedule
shit boi
Didn’t they just hire an assistant or some shit to help with video quality?
BugsyBadger HA! GOTEM!
oof I didn’t know you watched these doods
Someone needs to do a compilation of all the times that Jared has lost his shit laughing at something (extra points if they turn it into a song)
Walter Cabrera yes please!
Gotta love The DickeyDines Show, it's like having two far-away friends and every upload notification makes me wonder with excitement what these two brilliantly awesome goofballs have come up this time. Love both of you, never stop doing what you do!
Its like Christmas
someone please make a video compilation of jared dines laughing at dickeys jokes.
Sebass Slam why did u give people this idea
I wish I had seen this comment before posting one myself saying the same thing... I'm sorry internet, I've failed you
That's gonna be hours long
I honestly spit my food out at "cooch crumpets" hahahaha funniest thing of the day for sure
When I was in elementary school some guy walked into the bathroom I was in with a huge gash on his face, cleaning it up in the sink and he looked at me and said "never get into a knife fight."
Dudes comment made austin laugh like jared. He should be proud
My mom was a receptionist at a hospital one day a guy walked in handed her a ziplock bag with his severed finger inside and told her "I need a doctor"
Nice editing, minus the 33 secs of black screen at the end but I can ignore that, a man's gotta eat without that war robots sponsor
gto_173 thank you very much! Sorry about that Ya boi done goofed on the export and didn’t catch it haha
no worries austin haha, say tho how long have you been doing the editing for this channel?
0:00 Jared doing some shit clapping while Austin playing with his butterfly knife while looking bored out of his mind
"Decapitated head"... when you remove head from head
Cooch Crumpets 😂😂😂
So at the end of the street that I grew up on there are woods. Back in those woods, deep enough that you can't see it from the street, is an abandoned red house. Me and my friends used to go back there and climb up onto the roof of the house for shits and giggles. One time me and my friend were looking after his 13 year old cousin and decided to take him back there after dark. This time we managed to find a way into the house only to find at least a dozen used condoms lining the floor. To scare him we made up a story of how a girl was gang raped and murdered in the house and thats why it was boarded up and abandoned. As we were leaving the house, we heard gunshots coming from the woods and then the impact of bullets on the house. Needless to say we fucking hauled ass out of there.
Damn...that's fucked
Wait a second you would hear the impact and a crack. Then the gunshots
@@oweeeen uh oh
damn dude that’s insane
I got the notification just when I was looking for Austin Dickey memes. Love y’all guys 🤘
Gothic Evil Entries make one that says COOCH CRUMPETS
I saw two or three hot dogs (people dressed as so) participating in a wall of death at a kreator and sabaton concert
Thats amazing
Ayy nice background lights ma boys
9:45 You could say he "lost his marbles".
Cmdr Boothe fuck right the hell off
What’s poppin Bimjo?
phat’s boppen wimjo
bhats woppin pimjo?
Woppin pomjo bhats
🅱️imjo
Javier Olvera Jim🅱️o
I could see Austin being drunk and being like "Hey guys watch this" with that knife
The pan from Austin to Jared for the elephant bit... Fuckin priceless hahaha
"Prolapse the Pear" Sounds like a early 000's metalcore band.
No one:
Dead Japanese man: I BELIEVE I CAN FLY
As soon as I can afford a new computer, I'll definitely be making up a compilation of the fucking gold that comes from Austin's mind!
Austin’s laugh gives me life. Best thing I’ve ever heard 😂😂
0:10 when the eagle learns to use a knife
I saw an old man jump out the passenger door of a van and take a diarrhea dump right on the edge of my parent’s woods. My dad and I tried to stop him, but it was already too late.
I've got waaaayy too many crazy things that i've seen. From walking in to one of my friends performing oral sex on another friend (at my house) to an old crazy lady looking at me and was convinced i was a member of slayer (i was only 21 at the time) to seeing a friend wearing a gorilla mask chase another friend in a banana costume during halloween in highschool. The list goes on.....but by far the craziest thing i've seen is this crazy homeless guy tell me and my friends that McDonalds was built from the ground up by his family (we were at mcdonalds) and when we had to leave, he said "oh! Where do you plays live? I'll teleport you there! " we didn't even say anything and he begins to concentrate so hard that his veins were showing and his face began to turn red like a tomato. I'm fairly certain he shat his pants just by how his face was.
Scott,you saw your metal dude friend blowing another metal dude friend? Did they both have Slayer hair?
‘That picture comes with a video, Jared’ lmao
True story, was in jail when a line of children actually came and was staring at our pod. Does happen but all the CO's told us if anyone even blinked we would've been tased sprayed, then beaten to hell in the hole. Quietest day room we ever had lmao.
Good god, My stomach hurts from laughing so much! Loved the video guys
0:01 awesome butterfly knife tricks Austin 🤘🤘🤘
It's the best feeling when The DickeyDines Show uploads, then it's a feeling of utter emptiness when the video ends
I laughed so hard when I heard the "krumpets" comment that I started crying
Jared’s laugh makes the world a brighter place
Love the intros to these. And nice work with the balisong
You guys do really make me laugh and I love watching your videos. Keep spreading the smiles 😊😊
Chriss Steele
You're very pretty 😊😌
Austin’s reaction at 6:32 kills me every time 😂
The craziest shit I've ever seen is the elephant scene from the brothers grimsby
Cooch Crumpets I’m fucking dying that’s the funniest thing I’ve heard today I’m crying I had to hear that multiple times
I was in 5th grade when some dude rolled up in a car next to another kid across from me, the kid started running away saying "I don't know you!" and the old dude grabbed him, put him in his car, and drove off, I was hiding in a bush the whole time.
sen Lie
JacksGaming how would you know if he is lying? Were you there, in that situation?
@@jacks910 lmao i forgot about this comment. im fucking cringy lol
@@TheBullet0012 forgot about this comment until now. yeah that wasnt true i was bored and wanted to comment something lol
sen okay.. whatever man..
8:14 when jared and austin find out what sex is for the first time.
When I was a Paramedic student we got called to an alleged pedestrian struck at around 10 or 11 O'clock. Turns out that wasn't what happened, but the patient still needed some help anyways. He was a homeless guy who said he had shot up some crystal meth the night before and had been drinking rubbing alcohol that morning. He agrees to come into the ambulance with us so we can assess him without everyone on the street watching.
We sit him down on the jump seat, and he's behaving well and being cooperative, until I notice he has a little cut on his arm that he's suddenly fixated on. So I tell him to hold on while I get some gauze to bandage that up. In the span of time it took to turn around and pull a roll of gauze out of the cupboard and turn back around, he had started super vigorously trying bite chunks of skin and flesh off his arm around the cut. It took both myself and my preceptor to wrestle his arm out of his mouth and keep it out.
The whole time we're rushing to the hospital (maybe 3 minutes away) he had been going back and forth between telling us that he'd stop and behave, to going back to trying to bite his arms off. Then suddenly he stops, looks at me and smiles with bits of skin and blood between his teeth and says "You've got a cute nose", and then goes back to trying to eat his arm without skipping a beat. It was the most bizarre and surreal thing I've ever seen while wearing a uniform (or otherwise for that matter).
10:25 austin pissing him self laughing while dines is traumatized
Really digging the newer setup with the wash lights, it looks super cool 👍
CAN WE PUT COOCH CRUMPETS ON A SHIRT?
Obviously Miranda Do it!
I second this notion!
The videos always get a like, even before actually watching it.
Because honestly, when have I ever disliked a DickeyDines video?
(EDIT - Grammar. 🙄)
I really enjoy these types of videos😊 They are so entertaining. Thank you guys for making our days better with every upload❤️
What in the actual shit, I laughed SO FUCKING HARD at "Coochy Crumpet", literal tears of laughter with a bit of piss.
"Beating the snot out of her bean" I'M DYING 😂😂😂
Don’t you just hate it when you accidentally forget to tell Daddy Dickey to eat out your belly button?
My school sociology class visits a prison
Never stop making this videos, they make my day!
"Cooch Crumpets"
Wow I've never chocked so hard while laughing before
Good thing you didn't CHOKE... that would have been bad... but chocking your wheels will prevent your trailer from rolling...
Austin "noticing" me on 2 livestreams in a row was pretty crazy!
There's a knock at the door. A metal tray slides under. From the corner of the room Austin stirs and says "cooch crumpets again ?!"
#basementboi
3:12 to 3:16 had me following. The look on Austins face and words were priceless
Jared losing it is the best thing 😂
“Damn, that’s some whack shit right there” - Diggity Dines, 2018
This lighting setup is pretty nice, the look of the videos seems to reach the quality of the content ;D
That just gave a whole new meaning to soccer balls!
My husband was driving home from work one night and saw a deer jump out in front of a guy on a motorcycle. The guy hit the deer and was impaled by its antlers. The guy died on scene.
I absolutely love you guys 😂😂😂 I'm still laughing and I've watched this 3 times 😂
Note to self: Never watch a DickeyDines video while trying to take a drink, because there's a chance that Austin will say some fucked up shit like cooch crumpet and I'll run the risk of spitting out my drink in laughter all over my phone.
Austin: **joke**
Jared: **falls back, opens mouth as wide as possible, suffocates**
Cootch crumpets absolutely sent me
omg big respect for dickeys balisong skills lol
8:50 the sound effects when he pounds the table 😂😂
Just about a couple weeks ago me and my band were playing a gig out in Pelham New Hampshire. Long story short before we went on the guy hosting the show said their was gonna be a "freak show halftime show" and everybody had no clue what was going on. So they come up on stage in clown make up with one guy playing a banjo (there were three of them in the show) so for the leaders first act he took three volunteers and told the to spit in a cup the best loogy they could get and then proceeded to drink it . Then after he chugged a whole bottle of glass cleaner to wash it down. His second trick was with tic tacs he had three of them stuck one in his nose and the other two in each eye and made all three of them come out of his MOUTH. ALL THREE. While he was recovering from that another guy came up and did some not so impressive stuff. But for the leaders final act he had a tiny orange envolpe with a string and four brand new razor blades.. he then SWALLOWS all four razor blades one at a time then swallows just enough of the string so he can still grab it and one by one pulls out all four razor blades which were now tangled in the string.
Bodhi McKellick Bleah.....you lost me at the loogies.....
Jared says Tony's joke at the end, like can you make it look like you hit the camera 😂😂 love it
The craziest thing I’ve ever seen is two guys read a bunch of comments even though most of them sounded extremely fabricated and not one of them doubted their credibility for a second...
had a long day at work and your vids always cheer me up, you bros rock
“BEATING THE SNOT OUT OF YOUR BEAN”
Love the edits in this video. So funny!
that part where Dickey screamed was awesome
0:00 just casually flipping a knife
In second grade we had this tree on the play ground and this 1st grade girl (who was later nicknamed mullet grandma) always wore baggy clothing and sweat pants one day she stood by the tree and pulled down her pants and underwear, the teacher out that day began to yell and run towards her telling her to cover up, the girl proceeded to piss herself and when the teacher got closer she sprinted down the soccer field with her pants at her ankles and was caught once she tripped although she made it pretty far
4:55 For Criminal Justice class. I’ve had the same thing happen. Our class went to the men’s maximum security prison, and one of the inmates just stands in the window and starts going at it.
Yes, this needs part 2
9:20 I had to pause the video for a few minutes. Almost died laughing and was in shock😂
My sister is a nurse and she works in dialysis (they purify soiled blood) and they hook patients to a bunch of tubes and one of the nurses didn’t properly lock the tube in place. It detached and the patient got covered in his own blood. When telling me this story, she said "he wasn’t only pale from the blood loss"
I laughed out loud several times to this, thank you. Also stab story dude delivered.
Jared looks mortified from the elephant video lol
Also, "PROLAPSE THE PEAR" Me: dead lmao
Cooch Crumpets fucking killed me. And then Jared laughing his ass off at it killed me. 🤟🏻🤣 Love this fucking channel.
I fucking lost it when Austin said "That's a good trick" 😂😂😂😂☠️☠️☠️
13:00
Austin was killing the balisong tricks.
Y'all missed the perfect opportunity for a "bust a nut" joke
i'd watch 15 minutes of that intro, anyone else?
I forgot until now, but after a concert in San Diego I was walking to my ride that was next/behind the venue and there was a store that was for lease or something at the end of stores close by that had a concrete barrier about 4 feet high around it, as I walked by I heard something and looked....saw a dude with his pants down and a lady bent over in front of him, made eye contact with him for a second and continued to walk, super awkward
This isnt the craziest, but when i was 9, my first guitar teacher got arrested for pedophilia and child pornography, lucky I stopped lessons and decided to self teach myself before I he was able to get me
"decided to self teach myself"
You sure did a great job.
Literally fingered “A minor”
@@aaronstephens1227 oof
Austin says anything
Jared: HAHAGFAHAGAGAGAGGAGAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAAHAHAHS
6:31 best part of the video
8:42
I was flipping my Balisong knife, watching this video then I see Austin with one in the beginning.
3:42 same my guy.. but you got lucky. Both senpais never notice me.. 😂😭😭
8:50 O O F O O F
yeah you gotta do another one of these
love you guys keep up the great work!!!
The owl one is legit why dashcams were invented.
I had to visit the Coroner this year. Saw a green corpse of a homeless guy, a few dead grandmothers, and a dead baby.
My favorite intro so far is this one 😂😂